[Westheim]

Raccoons (20-22) @ Bayhawks (26-16) – May 23-25, 2016

The Baybirds were leading the South with a brisk .619 pace, and they hadn’t even played the Raccoons yet. This was the most potent offense in the Continental League, whacking out 5.4 runs per game, but they could use another good pitcher or two or five. Their rotation ranked in the bottom 3 and they were overall conceding the seventh-most runs. Their run differential of +43 did hint at greatness, however. We beat the Bayhawks 6-3 in 2015.

Projected matchups:
Tadasu Abe (2-3, 3.71 ERA) vs. William Raven (3-3, 5.15 ERA)
Chris Munroe (1-2, 3.12 ERA) vs. Jared D’Attilo (1-0, 3.47 ERA)
Jonathan Toner (3-5, 3.14 ERA) vs. Clark Johnson (0-0, 1.93 ERA)

First, that’s another three right-handers. Second, these three Birds have 28 appearances, but only nine starts combined. Johnson would make his first start of the year after the Bayhawks just put Gabriel Caro on the DL, where he will share time with Milt Beauchamp. They could also elect to send lefty Joao Joo (7-1, 1.89 ERA) on short rest and reassemble the remaining pieces on our common off day on Thursday, but we will have to see about that.

Catching at the Bay: Dylan Alexander, who is – of ****ing course – batting .302 with 5 HR and 27 RBI. He was one of four ex-Coons in their lineup, and none of them were even close to worse than in their time in Portland.

Game 1
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – 2B Walter – RF Richards – C McNeela – P Abe
SFB: RF Almanza – 1B McIntyre – LF Alston – CF D. Garcia – C D. Alexander – 3B J. Rodriguez – SS R. Miller – 2B V. Flores - Raven

While the Raccoons managed to hit into a double play right in the first inning, and at the first possible opportunity thanks to Ronnie McKnight precisely grounding to Vic Flores with Sambrano having singled before him, Tadasu Abe only needed ten pitches to put five Bayhawks on base – all that he faced. The first four all hit singles, plating two runs, and then he walked Alexander. After a strikeout to Javy Rodriguez and a 2-run single by Ryan Miller that hurt especially, Abe brought home another run with a wild pitch as the Bayhawks took a 5-0 lead in the first inning. Top 2nd, DeWeese led off with a single before Walter hit into a double play, which was enough to leave the nice enough suite for the visiting team and have a little walk, possibly down to the Bay, and to see whether it was possible to find a hidden corner to drown yourself in.

Turns out, no, there’s some water police dorks patrolling around and they fish out anybody. So by the time I had been dried and warmed up with a standard issue blanket, and had signed some paperwork that claimed it was all an accident and I had no intention to become a body in the water after all in order to avoid a medical examination (last thing I need now is professional help…), I just in time made it into a bar close to the Bay that was mostly deserted but ran the game on a TV to see Tom McNeela break up the shutout that William Raven had carefully knitted on for the last two-plus hours, a 2-out double in the top of the seventh. The Bayhawks were still up 6-1, and although I didn’t ask the elderly patron next to me, who with his stained monocle and his unkempt beard that sported a multitude of grays looked like a cross between the leader of a suicide cult and a 1930s hobo, he readily informed me that the Bayhawks had shown that Japanese import of those goddamn skunks and had rattled him for six runs in just four innings. ‘Damn Nips!’ he called out reportedly, shaking his fist. The bartender had an eye on him, but didn’t say anything. I saw Gallegos pitching in the bottom 7th with a pitch count of 18, which was all that I really needed to know about how things were going. Top 8th, former Coons farmhand G.G. Williams balked in a run while Danny Margolis was batting with two in scoring position and two outs, a recipe for not scoring if there ever was one, and every time there was a close-up of Margolis, my new friend would yell ‘Damn Nip! Damn Nip!’. Margolis obviously struck out against Jayden Maness, much to the old guy’s amusement, which only grew bigger with the 2-out, 2-run double that Chris Almanza hit off Mathis in the bottom of the inning. Goddamnit, I needed some relievers, and something to shove down that old yeller’s throat. Thankfully the Coons caused no commotion in the top of the ninth and the game ended quickly so that I could trot back to the hotel. 8-2 Bayhawks. Sambrano 2-4; Jones (PH) 1-1; DeWeese 2-3, BB; McNeela 2-4, 2B, RBI; Gallegos 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K;

Game 2
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – RF Richards – LF Ochoa – 2B Jones – C McNeela – P Munroe
SFB: RF Almanza – 1B McIntyre – LF Alston – CF D. Garcia – C D. Alexander – 3B J. Rodriguez – SS R. Miller – 2B Claros – P D’Attilo

For a moment early in this middle game I wondered whether I was in the wrong park. Ron Richards singled home McKnight with two outs in the first inning to give the Raccoons a 1-0 lead, but once Ochoa walked and Howard Jones fouled out with the bases loaded I was assured that I was watching the horrendous Raccoons trying to swing a stick. They would get a second run in the third inning when Matt Nunley went first-to-third on an Ochoa single, but scored when Almanza’s throw to third was well up the leftfield line. The lead didn’t hold up, despite Munroe being perfect the first time through, but he would be everything but the second time. Almanza hit a leadoff single in the fourth, stole second and made it to third on McNeela’s second throwing error of the series, and the Baybirds then got hard hits from Ron Alston and Dave Garcia to tie the game. The Critters would scratch out a new lead, 3-2, in the top of the fifth, but Will McIntyre’s leadoff jack in the bottom 6th erased that, and Munroe was then removed after a 2-out single by the damned Alexander. Beaver came in to face the lefty Rodriguez, whom he walked, before Ryan Miller’s RBI double put the Bayhawks ahead. For fun, Raul Claros would also hit an RBI single, 5-3, and they made it 7-3 before long when John Korb (so far without an earned run conceded this season) was taken deep by Dave Garcia for two in the seventh. The Raccoons didn’t look like a threat in the ninth inning, despite a leadoff single by Sambrano off Jeff Boynton. After a pop to third, Nunley dinked a single to center, however, sending Sandy to third. Adam Young’s 3-run homer was nice, sure, but it didn’t tie the game. It did provoke the Bayhawks to send Chae-ku Lee, however, and he retired Richards and DeWeese quickly to seal this game. 7-6 Bayhawks. Sambrano 2-5; Walter (PH) 1-2; Nunley 2-4, BB; Richards 2-5, RBI; Ochoa 2-3, BB, RBI;

I wonder what the Raccoons could get from a team dumb enough to trade for R.J. DeWeese’s services, with roughly $22.3M remaining on that contract.

Game 3
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 1B Jones – C McNeela – 2B Bergquist – P Toner
SFB: RF Almanza – 1B McIntyre – LF Alston – CF D. Garcia – C D. Alexander – 3B J. Rodriguez – SS R. Miller – 2B M. Robinson – P C. Johnson

It seems like DeWeese can sense the doubts and whenever that happens he finds a way to rip one and dispel them. That happened in the first inning. McKnight had singled and Nunley had doubled, and DeWeese pulverized a Johnson offering for a 3-run homer to right. Under normal circumstances this should have given Jonny plenty of room to pitch a great game, but somehow this wasn’t meant to be an easy afternoon once more. The Bayhawks made hard contact three times in the first inning. While that resulted in three outs, Toner never really got to dominate them, striking out only two (including the pitcher) in the first three innings, while allowing two doubles (luckily in different innings) and plenty of other hard shots across the park. A DeWeese triple in the third inning aside, the Raccoons didn’t amount to much of a threat (much less a run) after the early rampage, and just when Toner seemed to have found something of a groove and had retired six in a row he smacked Almanza with one out in the sixth. Almanza made everybody dizzy, dancing on and off first base, but repeated throws did nothing to shut him up. The Bayhawks ended up not getting another hit (or base), but Toner’s pitch count was rising as well, and was also starting to sabotage his own team’s already pathetic offense. When Bergquist reached on an error by Javy Rodriguez in the top of the seventh, Toner first got him forced out with a poor bunt, then was himself picked off first base. The Bayhawks put runners on the corners in the bottom 7th after a bloop double by Alexander that DeWeese played in an extremely ****ty way, and a Jones error, but Sambrano made the catch on a medium-difficulty Mike Robinson fly to left center, hissing off DeWeese, to end the inning.

Toner met a sticky end in the bottom 8th then, finally. Pat Eaton had a leadoff single, but was forced out on Almanza’s grounder. McIntyre’s single brought up the tying run and it was nobody less than Ron Alston. Sugano was called on, walked Alston, and departed having achieved nothing but damage. Mathis replaced him, and allowed an RBI single to Dave Garcia on the only pitch he threw. Now with a 3-1 lead and the bags still full, Ron Thrasher was asked with getting two outs from the two lefties and then finish the game. Alexander hit an enormous shot to center that Sandy Sambrano gauged forever before he made the catch at the edge of the warning track. McIntyre scored, 3-2, but Rodriguez struck out to end the inning. The Coons amounted to nothing in the top of the ninth, and Thrasher got a quick groundout from Ryan Miller to start the Bayhawks’ last chance at a comeback. Then Armando Chavez singled, and so did Jaime Mateo. Facing Almanza, Thrasher lost it completely and walked him on four pitches to load the bases. That wasn’t all, though. Thrasher walked PH Vic Flores to tie the game, and walked Alston to complete the sweep. 4-3 Bayhawks. DeWeese 2-4, HR, 3B, 3 RBI; Toner 7.1 IP, 5 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 0 BB, 6 K and 1-3;

So that’s it with Ron Thrasher (12.2 IP, 17 BB) closing games… or doing anything outside of refilling the Xerox with paper.

Of course we have no replacement closer. We have no closer, we have no setup guys, we have no offense, we have no Cookie, we have no second baseman, and we have no prospects to stuff any hole.

For ****’s sake…

Raccoons (20-25) @ Falcons (22-24) – May 27-29, 2016

The Falcons had their issues, too, ranking eighth in scoring and tenth in allowing runs in the Continental League. They had taken over 10th place in starter’s ERA from the Bayhawks thanks to the latter getting three days off against the incredibly terrible Raccoons. The Falcons had yet to win a game against the Raccoons in 2015, having been swept in the first series between the teams in April.

Projected matchups:
Nick Brown (4-4, 2.74 ERA) vs. Bobby Guerrero (4-2, 4.99 ERA)
Hector Santos (3-2, 2.98 ERA) vs. Ron Carter (3-5, 4.66 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (2-4, 4.40 ERA) vs. Dave Beebe (2-3, 3.78 ERA)

Another entirely right-handed rotation to fail against.

Game 1
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Medina – 2B Jones – C McNeela – P Brown
CHA: SS P. Hall – 2B D. Carter – LF Nieves – C Holliman – RF Mugan – CF J. Jimenez – 1B F. Soto – 3B Best – P Guerrero

In a stunning twist, the Raccoons mangled Bobby Guerrero for seven runs in the first inning, starting early with a single by Sandy and a 2-run homer hit by McKnight. Nunley singled, DeWeese was hit, and Medina hit into a force at second base before Guerrero walked first Jones, then McNeela, the latter with the bases loaded, 3-0. Nick Brown came up, singled hard to center to score two, and then Sandy scored two more with a hit up the rightfield line to make it 7-0. Annoyingly then, Nick Brown’s first seven pitches resulted in a walk and two deep fly outs to center, and Todd von Lindenthal was out there early to yell some sense into him. Ryan Holliman then grounded out to end the inning, and Brown seemed to make an adjustment between innings and got six mostly easy outs in the next two innings, with Steve Huibregtse hitting for Guerrero in the bottom 3rd, but he then issued his second walk to Dave Carter to start the bottom 4th, threw a wild pitch, and saw Carter score on two groundouts. He walked Steve Best and Paul Hall in the fifth before Carter ended the inning with a foul pop, so things were actually quite dicey here, despite a 6-run lead. The Coons were by now facing left-handed relievers that knew their craft, so there was no offense to be had anymore, unless perhaps Paul Hall would throw away a double play grounder, which he did in the top of the sixth, putting Sandy and McKnight both on base with no outs. What was the matter, Nunley wondered, hit into the double play instead, and Young grounded out on the first pitch in his continued quest for futility. Both bullpens would crumble a bit late, with the Raccoon scoring single runs in the seventh and eighth, while John Korb allowed a run in the bottom 8th. The game ended fittingly, with the Falcons having Jimenez and Best on base and Beaver pitching with one out in the bottom 9th when Adrian Quebell (.277, 4 HR, 23 RBI) hit for the relief pitcher, straight into a double play. 9-2 Brownies! Sambrano 3-6, 2 2B, 2 RBI; McKnight 2-5, HR, 3B, 2 RBI; Jones 2-4, BB, 2B, RBI; Brown 7.0 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 4 BB, 3 K, W (5-4) and 2-4, 2 RBI;

Game 2
POR: 2B Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – CF Medina – RF Richards – C Margolis – P Santos
CHA: 2B Best – CF Huibregtse – 1B Quebell – C Holliman – RF Mugan – SS P. Hall – LF J. Jimenez – 3B F. Soto – P R. Carter

The Coons had runners on the corners in the first inning, but DeWeese grounded out to strand them. The bases were loaded in the third inning after a leadoff single by Santos (the first for him this year), another single by McKnight, and Nunley getting drilled in the ribs. Young came up with one out, eager to do damage to either team, and settled for a sac fly to left, scoring the first run of the game, which did a little bit of damage to both. DeWeese then struck out. Santos, coming off two rotten starts the previous week, got three groundouts in the first, three strikeouts in the second, and three flyouts in the third, retiring 11 Falcons in total before Quebell hit a 2-out single to right in the bottom 4th, though that didn’t lead to anything. Offense was literally dead until after the middle of the seventh, when Quebell continued to keep the Falcons fans engaged with a 1-out double. Santos, so far having nursed a 1-hitter, immediately lost a few limbs. He hit Troy Mugan, then allowed another single to pinch-hitter Domingo Nieves, loading the bases with two outs and switch-hitter Jose Jimenez approaching. Colonel von Lindenthal went out to go over the motions of throwing a ****ing baseball with Santos, then threw up some barbed wire between third base and home plate, pointing at Quebell and yelling ‘Thou shalt not pass!’ – Jimenez struck out, ending the inning and preserving a 1-0 lead. Santos got another two outs in the bottom 8th before the left-handed top of the order approached and we sent out Sugano once more. Steve Best grounded out to end the inning, and Sugano remained in the affair for the bottom 9th. Huibregtse grounded out, Quebell struck out, but that brought up Holliman, who was a right-hander with a .313 average and nine dingers. Chun was sent for him, but couldn’t find the zone. One ball, two balls, three balls, and suddenly Holliman swung at a pitch that was low but more or less in the middle of the plate. He wonked it a ton to center, chasing Medina back, back, back, and all the way to the track, where he made the catch. 1-0 Furballs. Nunley 2-3, 2B; Santos 7.2 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 7 K, W (4-2) and 1-3;

It’s May and we’ve taken the season series against the Falcons, which seems odd.

This was also the last game of this set. The Sunday contest was rained out, which is a mild understatement for the storm that came crashing in just before the first pitch would have been thrown by Dave Beebe.

The game has been rescheduled for September 19 as part of a double header in Portland, in which the Falcons will be the home team. While both teams have common off days before that, there is no chance to reschedule the makeup date without giving either team a string of more than 20 games without an off day.

In other news

May 24 – 33-year old NYC CL Salvadaro Soure (2-0, 1.40 ERA, 12 SV) nails down his 400th save in protecting the Crusaders’ 6-4 win over the Knights. A four-time Reliever of the Year and 2013 FL Pitcher of the Year, Soure was oringinally signed by the Raccoons out of Venezuela, but never pitched for them, instead debuting with the Bayhawks at 19. He has been in All Star seven times, and is 64-64 with a 2.05 ERA and 1,310 K for his career.
May 24 – The Aces concede two runs in the top 10th to the visiting Canadiens, but then run up three runs themselves with a 2-run double by Bill Miller (.268, 1 HR, 17 RBI) walking them off with a 5-4 victory.
May 26 – NAS 1B/2B Marcos Garza (.341, 1 HR, 19 RBI) has run a hitting streak to 20 games with a single in the third inning of the Blue Sox’ 5-1 win over the Warriors.
May 28 – Nashville’s Marcos Garza (.333, 1 HR, 20 RBI) finds himself unable to extend his hitting streak to more than 21 games, being held dry by the Gold Sox in their 7-4 win over the Blue Sox.
May 28 – Crusaders and Thunder play a 15-inning marathon in Oklahoma City which the Crusaders end up winning, 5-4.
May 29 – SAC 3B Jason LaCombe (.346, 1 HR, 18 RBI) rips the Rebels for five hits in a 14-5 crushing, driving in three.

Complaints and stuff

Cookie Carmona will start a rehab assignment early next week. I think three games might be sufficient to get him back on track, maybe four. Well, he’s been out a month, there’s no need to re-break him now. But he should wear a brown cap again by the weekend. The timer on Alonso Baca still reads about two to three weeks before he could start a rehab assignment.

I tried to trade Jason Bergquist for a bullpen piece early this week, which didn’t work out. His trade value right now is about zero.

The amount of players that leave Portland and blossom seems to match the star players that come here to die. I have to intensify my attempts to find out about this particular gypsy curse.

Next week: Knights, Titans. After that, the Crusaders at home. Brrrr.

(I'm also on the draft pool, which is key this year with five picks in or close to the top 50!)

(Yes I know I will only draft more human garbage)