[Westheim]

Raccoons (9-4) @ Titans (9-3) – April 19-21, 2027

It had been six years since a Raccoons team had won the season series from a Titans team, and although the margin had been narrow in the last two seasons (8-10 each time), the lack of success was starting to become really irritating. Out of the gate, the Titans had it done mostly on pitching, conceding just 33 runs in 12 games, which came out to 2.75 runs per game. Their offense, while not exactly poor, had not quite kept up with that performance, and they ranked seventh in runs scored, even a tic behind the Coons.

Projected matchups:
Rin Nomura (1-0, 1.29 ERA) vs. Morgan Shepherd (1-1, 1.59 ERA)
Kyle Anderson (1-0, 4.15 ERA) vs. Dustin Wingo (2-0, 0.00 ERA)
Mark Roberts (0-1, 3.54 ERA) vs. Guillermo Regalado (1-1, 3.77 ERA)

Right, left, right in this series; Dustin Wingo was unscored upon in 16 innings, and had also issued only two walks and conceded nine hits. Looks like somebody was on fire. In a good way.

Game 1
POR: SS Ramos – LF Spencer – 2B Rock – 1B Harenberg – CF Mora – RF St. Germaine – 3B Nunley – C Liu – P Nomura
BOS: LF W. Vega – 1B Gasso – RF Good – CF Reichardt – 2B R. West – 3B Corder – SS Spataro – C A. Arias – P Shepherd

Nomura and Liu remained not a success story, with Rin Nomura issuing five walks in the first five innings, and all to the #5 batter and down in the Titans' lineup. Rhett West and Adam Corder both walked to begin the bottom 2nd, but a timely double play started by Nunley kept them in check. West hit a leadoff double in the fourth, after which Corder grounded out and moved him to third base, but then Nomura walked both Keith Spataro and Alex Arias and conceded the run anyway on a sac fly to center by Morgan Shepherd, and that was the first run in the game. The Raccoons were doing absolutely nothing once more, being 1-hit at that point, with only a sad Trey Rock single in the first inning to their name. Titans fans started paying attention when Adam St. Germaine reached base with a leadoff walk in the fifth inning, but the Raccoons couldn't help but ground out ****tily three times to leave him on base.

Nomura got yanked before the fifth inning was over after allowing a leadoff single to Gus Gasso, a deep fly for the first out procured by Mora off Matt Good's bat, after which he yanked Adrian Reichardt and eventually walked Adam Corder. Three on, two out for Ricky Ohl, who was no help in allowing a 2-run single, sharply spanked, to Spataro, walked Arias, and then somehow managed to not allow another 17 runs with Shepherd batting. Harenberg took his grounder for the third out, now three runs down. Meanwhile, against Morgan Shepherd, the Raccoons' pathetic hitting display never stopped. They amounted to three singles, two of those by Rock and one by Nunley, and negative seven runs. Julio San Pedro was sent into the save situation in the ninth, though, and a bloop (Rock), and a blast (Harenberg), and suddenly it was a 3-2 game with nobody out, and a new pitcher in Harry Merwin, and that right-hander would restore order. Nunley hit a 2-out single, but apart from that the Coons made three more outs just as pathetic as they had made all day long. 3-2 Titans. Rock 3-4; Nunley 2-4;

That was the 300th career save for Harry Merwin. I think I am on record for calling him useless or embarrassing or an excuse-me closer or something like that. Goes to tell you how much I know about baseball. Or people.

Game 2
POR: SS Ramos – LF Spencer – 3B Rock – 1B Harenberg – 2B Stalker – RF Gomez – CF St. Germaine – C Tovias – P Anderson
BOS: LF W. Vega – C Leonard – RF Braun – 1B Good – 2B R. West – CF Reichardt – 3B Corder – SS Spataro – P Wingo

Dustin Wingo's scoreless streak to begin the season ended right at 16 when the Coons poured more hits on him than they had scrabbled together against Shepherd in eight innings on Monday. Ramos and Spencer opened with singles before Rock and Harenberg both grounded out, but that at least got Ramos home. Stalker chipped in an RBI single, and Gomez also singled before St. Germaine grounded out to Good at first base. In turn, Kyle Anderson gave the outfielders a workout with the Titans hitting lots of deep drives, most of which were caught. West's to begin the second inning wasn't, but hit off the wall in rightfield for a triple. Corder would single him in, cutting the score to 2-1. Anderson tip-toed his way from inning to inning, hoping to avoid the big one while also praying for some support, which eventually did arrive, but late and not in huge amounts. Spencer hit a leadoff single in the sixth, and Tim Stalker doubled him in, and that was pretty much all the hitting the Raccoons did after the opening frame. Anderson reached the bottom 7th, got Corder and Spataro out before Wingo singled off him with two outs and that was it for Kyle Anderson. Portland went to Billy Brotman, who retired none of the two right-handers he faced, walking Willie Vega (who had swung for a golden sombrero on Monday) and allowing a bases-filling single to Keith Leonard, then somehow got the right-handed terror Adam Braun to pop out to strand three. Brotman retired Good to begin the bottom 8th before Ricky Ohl was allowed to fart in a crowded elevator, walking on West and Reichardt with the tying runs. Corder struck out before the Titans sent left-handed batter / mummy D.J. Fullerton, whichever cemetery they had desecrated to get him. Jeff Kearney replaced Ohl as the bullpen door continued to be worn out, conceded an RBI single, then struck out Yasuhiro Kuramoto batting for Wingo, somehow. Top 9th, Javy Salomon got two outs before the Coons loaded them up for a change, St. Germaine and Tovias hitting 2-out singles before Nunley pinch-walked in the #9 hole, bringing up Ramos, whose grounder up the middle and behind second base was intercepted by Rhett West, but not in time to make any play – St. Germaine scored on the infield single, 4-2. Jarod Spencer flew out to Vega to end the inning. That run was potentially golden given how Snyder pitched to the left-handers in the bottom 9th; Vega with a deep F8, Leonard with a REALLY deep F9, then a walk to Braun to spice things up. Matt Good hit a ball into the gap in right-center that Mora caught up with on the warning track to hold Good to a double, but there was also Adam Braun decidedly not stopping at third base when his run didn't matter. The Coons were acutely aware of his bad judgement as Mora fired the ball to the infield, hit the cutoff man Stalker, and Tim zinged home to kill off Braun by six feet to end the ballgame. 4-2 Coons. Ramos 2-5, RBI; Spencer 2-5; Stalker 3-4, 2B, 2 RBI; St. Germaine 2-4; Anderson 6.2 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 3 K, W (2-0);

Game 3
POR: SS Ramos – LF Spencer – 2B Rock – 1B Harenberg – CF Mora – RF St. Germaine – 3B Nunley – C Tovias – P Roberts
BOS: LF W. Vega – 1B Gasso – RF Braun – CF Reichardt – 2B R. West – 3B Corder – SS Spataro – C A. Arias – P Regalado

Mark Roberts still didn't much look like a Pitcher of the Year and Triple Crown winner once removed, and quickly was down 2-0 in the rubber game after stacking runners on the bases via assorted means, then conceding a 2-run triple to Keith Spataro to put Boston ahead. The Coons had one base hit and four strikeouts the first time through the order, but Kevin Harenberg opened the top 4th with a jack, which sort of seemed to get the team going. Mora reached on an infield single, St. Germaine walked, Nunley grounded out, but that opened the door for Tovias to be walked intentionally and for Roberts to bat with three on and one out, wheee. That was also what the Titans thought, but they would be disappointed and shocked once Roberts slung a single up the middle to drive in the tying run and to keep the bases filled for Ramos, who also hit an RBI single to center. Spencer's sac fly made it a 4-run inning, just before Trey Rock rolled over to Gus Gasso to end the fun. And what was winless Roberts' response? Hitting Adrian Reichardt with a 1-2 pitch, leading off the bottom 4th. Now, no harm was done in a permanent way and Reichardt was caught stealing to end the inning, but … did we really know this was the real Roberts? Does that guy have any ID he could show us?

Whoever the **** was wearing #75 struck out two in the bottom 5th, but also drilled Alex Arias, allowed a single to Willie Vega with two outs, then a Mora-defeating long, long double by Gus Gasso that tied the game at four. When Roberts put West and Spataro aboard with singles in the bottom 6th, the Coons yanked him and brought in Dan McLin which was akin to treating an ingrown toe nail with chainsawing off the leg at the knee, but choices were slim with Ricky Ohl unavailable especially. To anybody's amazement, McLin struck out Arias after running a full count, keeping the game tied for now. When Rock, Harenberg, and Mora all lopped singles off Mike Stank in the seventh inning to load them up with one out, Tim Stalker batted for St. Germaine and hit into a double play on a 3-1 pitch, so so much for our secret weapon nobody had seen coming. Pretty sure we'd all see it going …! In turn, full-o'-**** Dan McLin put Kuramoto and Vega on base to begin the bottom 7th, was absolutely no help whatsoever, and Josh Boles conceded the runs eventually on an Adam Braun single that put Boston 6-4 ahead. Billy Brotman conceded another run in the eighth. The Raccoons never squeaked after the Stalker double play. 7-4 Titans. Harenberg 2-4, HR, RBI; Mora 3-4; Tovias 2-3, BB;

Raccoons (10-6) @ Bayhawks (8-8) – April 23-25, 2027

The Bayhawks led the Continental League with 88 runs scored, an impressive 5.5 runs per game, and were tied for sixth in runs allowed, so how could they only be at .500 with a +23 run differential? This was not a mystery solved easily, and they had at least one game of 8+ runs scored against opponent faced so far this season, so that would be the main challenge for the Critters, to keep them off home plate. Portland had won the season series four years in a row, including 5-4 in 2026.

Projected matchups:
Rico Gutierrez (1-1, 4.00 ERA) vs. Tom McGuire (2-1, 2.78 ERA)
Dan Delgadillo (1-1, 3.31 ERA) vs. Rafael Cuenca (1-1, 4.76 ERA)
Rin Nomura (1-1, 2.41 ERA) vs. Alex Vallejo (3-0, 1.80 ERA)

For this series, we'd get the left-handed pitcher up front, then two of their four right-handers. We'd miss ex-Coon Matt Huf, off to a 1-2 start with a 4.50 ERA.

Game 1
POR: 2B Spencer – 3B Rock – RF Gomez – 1B Harenberg – SS Stalker – CF Mora – C Tovias – LF Carmona – P Gutierrez
SFB: CF Hawthorne – 3B Hawkins – LF J. Correa – 1B Caraballo – 2B Pick – C R. Anderson – RF Ryder – SS Pulido – P McGuire

McGuire was perfect until he nailed Rico Gutierrez (but before striking out Spencer anyway), and Rico had already been struck in the hindpaw by a Tom Hawkins shot in the bottom 1st, so he'd doubtlessly be nothing more than a bloody pulp by game's end. Maybe also a loser, because the Raccoons were not exactly driving all over McGuire despite putting Rock (single) and Gomez (walk) on base to begin the fourth inning. Harenberg grounded into a fielder's choice, Stalker lined out to Hawkins, and what the heck was Mora gonna do? More importantly, what was McGuire gonna do? He threw a wild pitch to begin the Mora appearance, plating Trey Rock with the first run of the game. Two pitches later, Abel Mora hit an RBI double to center, putting the Coons up 2-0 before Tovias grounded out.

The Raccoons DID grow annoyed though by the fifth inning, in which McGuire hit Gutierrez YET AGAIN. Free base runners are all dandy, but can you please not knock up your pitcher? Unless of course you want your damn pitcher knocked up, too! Too bad you couldn't threaten the Baybirds anymore that you'd throw a curveball into Dave Garcia's bum, which would have rendered him out for the season… Nothing good came out of Gutierrez running the bases this time, either, and much the contrary, ****ing Tom McGuire continued to own him with a leadoff single in the bottom 6th which preceded George Hawthorne's game-tying homer to centerfield. Hawkins singled, Jon Correa singled, Gutierrez misfielded Pat Pick's grounder for an error, then struck out Ryan Anderson to bring up Zachary Ryder with two outs … and then got taken deep to left for a grand slam, and that basically ended the game. The Bayhawks lost Hawkins to injury by the eighth inning, but McGuire kept merrily throwing into Raccoons hitters, drilling Stalker in the ninth. Abel Mora would draw a walk after that, putting two on with nobody out in a 6-2 game and evoking an appearance by ex-Coon and closer Ryan Corkum, who conceded one run on a Cookie sac fly, but the Raccoons never got the tying run to the plate. 6-3 Bayhawks. Mora 1-2, 2 BB, 2B, RBI;

The next pitcher that looks at one of my guys funny gets beaned into a coma, I swear!

Also, with Dan Delgadillo, who wore a "you kiddin'?" look when he glanced the lineup, paired with the basically byzantine Liu, we would always have an excuse.

Game 2
POR: SS Ramos – LF Spencer – 2B Rock – 1B Harenberg – CF Mora – RF St. Germaine – 3B Nunley – C Liu – P Delgadillo
SFB: CF Hawthorne – 3B Ryder – LF J. Correa – RF C. Martinez – 1B Caraballo – 2B Pick – C Jai. Jackson – SS O. Camacho – P Cuenca

The goddamn Coons put Ramos and Spencer on the corners with singles to begin the game and couldn't score either one of them as Rock flew out to shallow right, Harenberg walked, Mora fouled out behind home plate, and St. Germaine unleashed the most embarrassing roller of the decade over to Tomas Caraballo. By contrast, the Baybirds got a leadoff single from Hawthorne, who would steal two bases in the inning, two walks issued by Delgadillo, a Caraballo sac fly, and finally Pat Pick nailing a fastball for a 3-run homer while Liu was set up far outside in a crouch and wondered what had just happened – and there he was not the only one wearing a Coons hat. Another run scored in the bottom 2nd on two more walks and Zachary Ryder's RBI single, putting San Francisco ahead by five, or when facing the Raccoons: a whole series' worth. In between, Jing-quo Liu had hit a single in the second inning for his first ABL base hit, then had been seen shaking his head in disappointment when Delgadillo popped up a bunt for the second out. Needless to say, the Raccoons did not appear to be in a great hurry to get back into this game.

Instead, Delgadillo hurried out of this game after a Jaiden Jackson homer extended the gap to 6-0 in the bottom 3rd, and Kevin Surginer got churned for seven hits in 1.2 innings after replacing him. Surginer left the bases loaded, one out, and a 7-0 score to McLin, so you knew the Coons had given up on this game in particular and meaningful existence in general and were embracing the rout. McLin gave the Bayhawks their 8-run game with a balk (…!) before Hawthorne flew out to left and Omar Camacho was thrown out at home plate by Spencer to end the miserable fifth. And misery never really ceased, despite McLin finishing the game in long relief, with the Bayhawks continuing to hit drives all over the place, just without scoring any more runs. Kevin Harenberg hit the most meaningless home run in memory in the eighth inning, and that was all to the Coons in this game. 8-1 Bayhawks. Spencer 2-4; Harenberg 2-3, BB, HR, RBI; Nunley 2-4, 2B;

Probably to complete the humiliation on the Coons, the Bayhawks declared Sunday the debut of 22-year-old right-hander Ben Lipsky, once a supplemental round pick by the Rebels in 2023, and having arrived in San Francisco in a trade in 2024 that involved lots of money as well as Rafael Gomez – ya, the one on our roster now.

Game 3
POR: SS Ramos – LF Spencer – 2B Rock – 1B Harenberg – CF Mora – RF Gomez – 3B Nunley – C Tovias – P Nomura
SFB: LF Hawthorne – 3B Ryder – CF J. Correa – RF C. Martinez – 1B Caraballo – 2B Pick – C R. Anderson – SS O. Camacho – P Lipsky

Lipsky's first career out was Alberto Ramos being caught stealing, and wasn't that a great start to any game? Lipsky whiffed four and was near-perfect the first time through the Coons' order, with Nunley opening the third inning with a double to right, but he was obviously stranded on second base. Meanwhile Nomura pitched awfully even when paired with a catcher he could actually ****ing talk to, the Bayhawks stranding them left and right early on rather than scoring, with the main defensive heroics being Rafael Gomez blatant robbery on Jon Correa's drive to deep right with two outs in the bottom 3rd. The awesome catch took away a sure RBI double and denied the Bayhawks their first run in the game. Nope, the first run of the game didn't come until the fifth inning and did involve both of the 2024 trade buddies – Rafael Gomez rammed a leadoff jack off Lipsky to put the Coons in front. Nunley also singled to get on base after this, but Nomura would take care of him with a horrendous bunt right into Lipsky's waiting arms for a 1-6-3 double play.

Nomura avoided damage, somehow, on two walks in the bottom 4th, two hits in the bottom 5th, and instead it was the Coons who tacked on in the sixth inning on Ramos' leadoff walk, after which he reached third base when Ryan Anderson misfired to centerfield on his stolen base attempt, then scored on a Spencer single. Jarod stole second base, but having a quick runner there with nobody out was nothing that could potentially help the Coons' middle of the order, which made three sad outs around Harenberg being walked intentionally. Speaking of intentional walks, the Coons issued one to Camacho in the bottom 6th with Pat Pick on third base in unearned fashion after a gross throwing error by Rin Nomura, and two outs. What was Lipsky gonna do? Damage? (grunts) No, he didn't, after Mora raced into the gap to spear a biting rocket hit on a 1-2 pitch by Nomura who probably couldn't believe his luck either. He departed in the seventh after Ryder singled, scored and waited for being cashed in. The Coons left it to Josh Boles to surrender a 2-out RBI single to Cesar Martinez, once a vaunted Indians slugger, before Caraballo went down on strikes. That didn't mean Nomura's luck was over, after all HE had not surrendered a HOMER to Martinez! Also, the bottom 8th began with Pat Pick hitting a screaming double off Ricky Ohl, and somehow the Bayhawks managed to strike out three times while Ricky remained in desperate search of the strike zone and walked Camacho with one out. The ninth also had a double, Correa's with one out against Snyder, who next surrendered a spiked bouncer at Matt Nunley, that the veteran turned for the second out on Martinez, after which Caraballo mercifully grounded out to Trey Rock to end this nerve-wrecking series. 2-1 Blighters. Ramos 1-2, 2 BB; Nunley 2-4, 2B; Nomura 6.2 IP, 6 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 4 BB, 3 K, W (2-1);

In other news

April 20 – Achievements, achievements: CIN 3B/1B Eddie Moreno (.261, 4 HR, 10 RBI) hits for the cycle in the Falcons' 6-4 win over the Aces, coming to the plate four times and going unretired with 2 RBI. The cycle is the 74th in ABL history and the fourth for the Aces after those of Hubert Green, Joe Morton (both 1999), and Jose Jimenez (2015).
April 20 – WAS RF/LF/1B Tsuneyoshi Tachibana (.298, 7 HR, 24 RBI) connects for three home runs in an 11-5 win over the Cyclones, marking the 50th time an ABL player has hit three or more home runs in a game. It is the third time the achievement has been completed by a Capital after Bob Butler (2010) and Matt Hamilton (2022).
April 20 – The Wolves acquire 3B/SS Guillermo Obando (.407, 0 HR, 4 RBI) and a prospect from the Capitals for SP Jorge Beltran (2-1, 1.25 ERA).
April 20 – NYC SP Carlos Marron (0-1, 4.61 ERA) figures to miss a month with a strained hamstring.
April 21 – SFW CF/1B Pedro Cisneros (.222, 0 HR, 2 RBI) is everything that stands between LAP SP Brian Cope (1-0, 1.09 ERA) and a perfect game. Cisneros hits a leadoff single in the first inning, and later draws a 2-out walk in the ninth inning that brings on the Pacifics' closer Kevin Woodworth to end the 2-0 game.
April 24 – The Thunder lose, 3-2 in 14 innings, in Indianapolis on MR Pedro Hernandez (0-3, 7.30 ERA) plating Indy's Joe Dale from third base with a wild pitch.
April 25 – IND SP Mark Matthews (0-2, 2.08 ERA) could miss the rest of the season with a torn rotator cuff.
April 25 – The beleaguered Scorpions beat the Buffaloes 12-1 on the strength of an 8-run seventh inning and a 4-for-5 performance by INF John Byrd (.262, 1 HR, 4 RBI), who goes 4-for-5 with 3 RBI.

Complaints and stuff

Many say they are gaining weight when watching baseball, which is due to all the pretzels, but I find I am losing weight due to the sweat running all over me for three hours every day. I can't eat during games. Impossible. The Coons are hard to digest on their own without bratwurst and sauerkraut on top. Drinking is not that much of a problem. (tries to resist Maud as she wants to wrestle a bottle of booze away)

This was not a pretty week. You never expect much when playing the Titans, and the series loss was sad, but the Bayhawks series was outrageous. No hitting, no pitching, sometimes no fielding, not even bunting! How they stole a single game in that series remains a mystery…

Fun Fact: After 50 years and 50 times a batter hit three or more home runs in a game, Portland's Craig Bowen remains the only "or more" in the category. Bowen went deep four times in a 14-2 rout of the Loggers on August 31, 2007.

Bowen went 5-for-5 in the game and drove in nine runs, one of those displays of offensive prowess you will never forget if you watched it. Well, 2007 was magical in its own right, but I still don't know what was the bigger miracle – Bowen swatting four, or Cássio Boda outdueling Martin Garcia the next day…! Two homers each by Bowen came off William Lloyd and Leonardo Gonzalez, and he also hit a double in between off Steve Galloway. 20 years later, none of these pitchers ring very familiar anymore…

Also in that lineup was Jose Gutierrez, playing second base and batting seventh, who 20 years later is the oldest fart still on a major league payroll. These were also the "Duke Smack" Raccoons, and of course the first to post a winning record since 1996.

They were also the Coons to blow a 10 1/2 game lead on June 26 to the Crusaders on their way to their first three-peat.