[Westheim]

Raccoons (14-10) @ Crusaders (10-13) – May 5-7, 2036

The repeatedly bereft Raccoons staggered into New York to play a 3-game set with the Crusaders, starting on Monday. The Crusaders were on the low end of runs scoring, ninth in offense and third in pitching. Their bullpen was however wonky and had an ERA more than three quarters of a run worse than their rotation. Meanwhile, the Raccoons had placed their last middle-of-the-order holdout on the DL on Monday morning and were now hoping that ****ing Ed Hooge would keep getting the occasional base hit… Last year’s season series with the Crusaders ended up being split, 9-9.

Projected matchups:
Darren Brown (2-2, 4.30 ERA) vs. Ignacio del Rio (1-2, 2.96 ERA)
Gilberto Rendon (1-1, 5.88 ERA) vs. Eddie Cannon (2-1, 3.38 ERA)
Colt Willes (4-0, 1.19 ERA) vs. Jamie O’Leary (1-1, 3.75 ERA)

Two right, one left, and then a day off. The Raccoons penciled Tony Morales in for cleanup on Monday, which was *weird* given his single-digit homer total and him just having turned 22, but he had run out of conventional options by now…

Game 1
POR: SS Ramos – 3B Myers – RF M. Fernandez – C Morales – 2B Vickers – LF Hooge – CF Maldonado – 1B Maruyama – P Brown
NYC: LF Salto – SS Obando – 2B M. Hurtado – C Brooks – RF Chavira – 3B G. Ortiz – CF Balado – 1B Dupuis – P del Rio

The Raccoons would take a 2-0 lead in the second inning with three 2-out singles by Hooge, who doubled, then turned around third base on a Jesus Maldonado single. Recently promoted, Maldonado got the RBI in his first at-bat of the season, moved to second on the throw, then scored on a Maruyama single to left-center. Berto singled, stole second, and scored on a Fernandez single in the third, 3-0, then hit an RBI single with two outs and the bases stacked with Vickers, Hooge, and Maruyama in the fourth. Rich Vickers scored, but then Dave Myers grounded out to short. Darren Brown started reasonably well and scattered a few early singles, but then issued a 4-pitch walk to Mario Hurtado in the bottom 4th, leading off the inning. Jeremiah Brooks immediately singled and Brown threw a wild pitch, which tolled all the bells of doom I had in my head, but he didn’t collapse; Hurtado scored on a groundout, but Brooks was left stranded, and Brown looked fine the following inning, so maybe he would be alright altogether? Indeed, Brown would not be scored upon again in the game, lasting seven innings of 1-run ball. He walked Guillermo Obando to lead off the sixth, but Brooks doubled him up, and Greg Ortiz pushed a single up the middle in the seventh, but was doubled up by Jose Balado’s grounder to Vickers. In between, Tony Morales had doubled in Dave Myers in the seventh, creating a 4-run lead. The pen had to get six outs, and did so without accident despite employing Casey Moore AND Dusty Kulp, with a sprinkle of Mauricio Garavito in between. 5-1 Critters. Ramos 2-4, BB, RBI; Hooge 3-4, 2 2B; Brown 7.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 4 K, W (3-2);

Game 2
POR: SS Ramos – 3B Myers – CF M. Fernandez – C Morales – 2B Vickers – LF Hooge – 1B Maldonado – RF Keller – P Rendon
NYC: LF Salto – SS Obando – 2B M. Hurtado – C Brooks – RF Chavira – 3B G. Ortiz – CF Balado – 1B Dupuis – P E. Cannon

The Raccoons got off to an even faster start, with Berto and Myers occupying the corners and nobody out. Fernandez grounded to short, but a brief fumble by Obando took away the double play and only Fernandez was retired while Berto scored. Morales and Maldonado then had additional RBI base hits for a quick 3-0 edge, which now had to be handed over, begrudgingly, to third-year Raccoon Gilberto Rendon, who was never recognizable from one year to the next. And he continued to be ****ty from the start here – the Crusaders hit three screamers for base hits in the first inning, a Graciano Salto single, an Obando double, and a Brooks RBI single. In between Hurtado popped out and Vinny Chavira *jammed* a ball into Berto’s glove for a 6-4-3. Getting hit by a pitch by Cannon surely didn’t make Rendon any better, and to add insult to injury, Cannon hit a 2-out RBI single off him in the bottom 2nd, plating Jose Balado to cut the gap to 3-2. He loaded the bases in the bottom 3rd with two walks and a single, allowed a bases-loaded 1-out single to Balado to tie the game, a LONG sac fly to John Dupuis to fall behind, and then barely struck out Cannon this time ‘round…

Somehow the Crusaders let go of him after that and the Raccoons silently removed him from the game after five innings, still 4-3 behind. After hour(s) of deafening silence, the Raccoons didn’t awake again until the seventh inning; in between Tim Stalker’s pinch-hit 1-out single in the #9 hole and the first inning they had landed only one meager base hit. Following on here, Berto drew a walk that pushed the tying run into scoring position and then Dave Myers dropped a ball in shallow left-center on which Stalker scooted around third base and scored to even the tallies at four. Fernandez flew out easily, but poor man’s cleanup hitter Tony Morales came through with a 2-out single to center on which Berto easily scored from second base, and the Critters were up 5-4. Vickers then struck out, ending the inning with two stranded.

Between Yeom Soung and Casey Moore, a longtime Crusader, the Critters pieced two innings together, setting up Chris Wise for a save opportunity, but we still got dips at Mike Hugh (the rule 5 pick that was foolishly returned so long ago it’s not even funny anymore; Hugh was 28 by now), who faced the top of the order in the ninth. Berto led off with a single, but was caught stealing and nobody ever scored in the inning. Bottom 9th, Hurtado fanned, Brooks lined out to short, and John Hansen hit a belter to right that Jason Keller caught half-blindly while racing back with terror on his face. 5-4 Critters. Myers 3-5, RBI; Morales 2-4, 2B, 2 RBI; Stalker (PH) 1-2;

Game 3
POR: 3B Myers – SS Marsingill – LF M. Fernandez – 2B Vickers – CF Maldonado – 1B Maruyama – RF Pinkerton – C Wall – P Willes
NYC: LF Salto – SS Obando – 2B M. Hurtado – C Brooks – 3B G. Ortiz – CF Balado – RF M. Porter – 1B Dupuis – P O’Leary

Rain wiped out the starters after five innings in which precious little had happened after a pair of singles had sent Obando and Hurtado to the corners in the first and Jeremiah Brooks had hit a sac fly to center. That was the only run before the rain delay of more than an hour, with the Raccoons scattering four singles in the most inefficient manner imaginable. Willes had allowed only one more base hit to the Crusaders than that offending pair of singles.

The end of rain at least gave Portland a shot at the pen, even though the first guy out there, Joe Hicks, had an ERA under one. He retired the Coons in order in the sixth, but Maldonado reached on a Hurtado error to begin the seventh and then Chiyosaku Maruyama drew a walk. Immediately, this was our best chance since the day before…! Preston Pinkerton struck out, but Kurt Wall singled to center to load the bases for a pinch-hitter, who turned out to be Tony Morales as the Critters hoped for a big knock! They got a grounder up the middle that thankfully eluded Hurtado for an RBI single, tying the game. Dave Myers then took Hicks apart with a gapper for a 2-run double, and the Crusaders moved on to another righty, Gabe McGill and his 13.50 ERA. Ramos batted for an 0-for-3 Marsingill, but struck out, and Manny Fernandez disappointingly grounded out to short, keeping the score at 3-1. Kurt Wall added a run in the eighth with a 2-run single, scoring Rich Vickers, and Vickers in turn drove in Manny Fernandez for an unearned run in the ninth inning, giving the Critters five total. Garavito had pitched a solid eighth, but even with the save being off, the Raccoons still went to bother Wise in the bottom 9th because him and Soung were the only somewhat rested relievers left in the pen. Wise struck out two in a quick 1-2-3 inning, securing the sweep. 5-1 Critters! Vickers 3-5, RBI; Maruyama 2-3, BB; Wall 2-4, 2B, RBI; Morales (PH) 1-1, RBI; Willes 5.0 IP, 3 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 3 K;

Raccoons (17-10) @ Scorpions (10-18) – May 9-11, 2036

This was the third straight years of playing the Scorpions, who were currently not going anywhere nice. Their pitching was awful, with a 4.56 ERA in the rotation (9th in FL) and a league-worst bullpen ERA of *6.47*. Their offense was also mostly in the bottom half in most categories. They looked ripe for the taking. Portland had taken two of three games in ’35.

Projected matchups:
Bernie Chavez (2-1, 2.75 ERA) vs. Steve Corcoran (3-1, 2.04 ERA)
Raffaello Sabre (2-2, 3.69 ERA) vs. Josh Vercher (3-3, 4.83 ERA)
Darren Brown (3-2, 3.60 ERA) vs. Mario Bojorques (1-5, 6.96 ERA)

This series would go the other way round: first a southpaw, then two right-handers.

Game 1
POR: SS Ramos – 3B Myers – CF Maldonado – LF M. Fernandez – 2B Stalker – RF Pinkerton – 1B Maruyama – C Wall – P Chavez
SAC: CF Sandstrom – LF Cortes – RF Greenway – 1B Hollenbeck – 2B Laughren – C H. Alvarez – 3B Stackhouse – SS Peeler – P Corcoran

Corcoran still had that dismal Elk smell on him, so I hoped the boys would knock him around a bit and then get rid of him in due time. To my great dismay none of it happened, and the first guy knocked out was – literally – Dave Myers, who got bowled over by former Coons scrub Craig Hollenbeck going first-to-third on a Hector Alvarez single in the bottom 2nd. Hollenbeck didn’t beat the throw by Pinkerton, but he sure beat up Myers, who had his arm wrapped around his body rather weirdly and had to come out of the game, to be replaced by Marsingill. Tim Stackhouse grounded out to end the inning, but Steve Peeler hit a leadoff single in the bottom 3rd, stole second, moved up on a groundout, and then was balked home by Bernie Chavez for the first run of the game…

Again, that was the only run through five innings and the Coons only had a sigh’s worth of hits, three to be precise. Bottom 6th, Carlos Cortes hit a double with one out. Bernie walked Troy Greenway, then conceded a sharp RBI single to Hollenbeck, the dismal bastard. The inning ended with a pair of strikeouts, but the Coons now had a 2-0 hole to dig out of. They showed no signs of being up to the task; nothing good happened in the seventh and eighth innings besides a lonely Pinkerton single. Corcoran, the vile-smelling former Elk, arrived in the ninth still up 2-0 and would continue to pitch to the 3-4-5 batters. Maldonado led off with a double to left, which was a good start! Unfortunately, after that Fernandez lined out to Greenway and Stalker grounded out poorly. Rich Vickers pinch-hit in the #6 spot, grounded over to short, and that completed the 5-hit shutout. 2-0 Scorpions. Myers 1-1; Chavez 6.2 IP, 7 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 1 BB, 6 K, L (2-2);

The mere appearance of Dr. Chung and his face that was simultaneously concerned and disgusted was not something I needed to see any more of, but here he was… So, Dr. Chung, what is it with Myers? – How bad? – So he can play? – That is good news! – What, there is also bad news? – What do I do with a third baseman that can’t throw??

And so Dave Myers was whisked to the DL with a hyperextended elbow. The minimum 15 days might be enough, I hear, never mind that we now have our #2 through #5 batters on the DL and I don’t know how we can even continue. I guess as long as we’re only half a game behind the Titans we’ll just scratch some scrubs together and play every day……

Matt Triolo was called up from AAA, a left-handed bat to pair with Marsingill for a platoon.

Game 2
POR: SS Ramos – LF Hooge – RF M. Fernandez – C Morales – 2B Vickers – CF Maldonado – 3B Triolo – 1B Maruyama – P Sabre
SAC: CF Sandstrom – LF Cortes – RF Greenway – 1B Hollenbeck – 2B Laughren – C H. Alvarez – 3B Downs – SS Peeler – P Vercher

While the ravaged Raccoons were hitless through three innings, the Scorpions ticked hits off Sabre left and right, and this was it, right? This was how it would end? With Buzz Simpleton hitting .179 in cleanup for the Raccoons by June, and them never scoring a run again, right?? The Scorpions, not decimated by injuries, got Greenway and Hollenbeck into scoring position in the bottom 3rd, and Paul Laughren shot a ball through Maruyama for a 2-run double for the first markers on the scoreboard. The first base knock for Portland would be a leadoff double by Ed Hooge in the fourth inning. A Manny single put the tying runs on the corners for Tony Morales, who hit a sac fly, which at least got us on the board. Vickers then doubled to left, but Fernandez had to hold at third base when he stumbled turning second; however, Maldonado had the tying and go-ahead runs in scoring position. He was also batting .167 since his call-up… he took strike three, Triolo popped out, and the runners were stranded. Sabre then walked Steve Peeler in the bottom of the inning, the runner was bunted over by Vercher, and scored on Chris Sandstrom’s single, 3-1 Sacramento…

When the Coons tied the game in the fifth, they did so with not one, but two Scorpions errors to aid them. Maruyama led off the inning with a double, but was still on base with two outs and only scored when Ed Hooge reached on Adam Down’s 2-base throwing error. Ed went on and scored on Manny’s single, and Morales reached on Peeler’s error. Peeler would however handle Rich Vickers’ grounder, ending the inning at three-all.

Sabre pitched into the seventh without getting a decision; he was lifted for Garavito when the Scorpions pinch-hit the left-handed Christian Abel in Hollenbeck’s slot, and Garavito secured the K to end the inning. Top 8th; Morales drew a leadoff walk from Vercher, then as immediately doubled up by Vickers… Garavito got two outs in the bottom 8th before Prieto replaced him to face Downs. Again, a pinch-hitter sprung up, Mark Vermillion, normally a regular and All Star, but befallen by hard to explain struggles this year. He shook those off with a pinch-hit homer to give the Scorpions a 4-3 lead in the eighth and set up left-hander Jacob Poirier for a save opportunity. Maruyama struck out. Marsingill struck out. Berto singled! …but Hooge popped out. 4-3 Scorpions. Hooge 2-5, 2B, RBI; Morales 1-2, BB, 2 RBI;

After this game the Scorpions traded for 3B/2B Adam Corder (.221, 0 HR, 1 RBI) of the Gold Sox, parting with a minor leaguer and a prospect.

The Raccoons remained bereft and wandering the desert.

Game 3
POR: SS Ramos – C Morales – CF M. Fernandez – LF Hooge – 2B Stalker – 1B Maldonado – RF Keller – 3B Triolo – P Brown
SAC: CF Sandstrom – LF Cortes – RF Greenway – 1B Hollenbeck – SS Laughren – 3B Corder – C H. Alvarez – 3B Downs – 2B Stackhouse – P Bojorques

Sandstrom walked, Cortes walked, Troy Greenway went yard, and Brown walked two more in the first inning on his way to AAA. Down 3-0 in the first, the Raccoons, who had nothing better than a .200 batter behind cleanup man ED HOOGE, were beaten before the game had really begun, and a Bojorques single and a Carlos Cortes homer put the game out of reach for good, 5-0 after two innings.

Not that the Critters didn’t almost make up the deficit after Berto led off the third with a triple to right. Morales hit an RBI single, but then Fernandez stupidly popped out at 3-0. That one soon hurt, with Hooge and Stalker reaching base, the latter singling home a run, and Hooge scoring on Maldonado’s groundout, cutting the gap to 5-3. Keller’s single got Stalker across, 5-4, but of course the game would have been tied by now… After Triolo got drilled, Vickers batted for the ****ty, ****ty Darren Brown, but grounded out, stranding the tying and go-ahead runs. The Raccoons asked Dusty Kulp for long relief, but somehow he understood “suck his hard as you can”. He walked Adam Corder and Hector Alvarez to begin the bottom 3rd, then threw away Bojorques bunt for a Scorpions run, 6-4. Somehow Sandstrom and Cortes didn’t rip his stupid bum apart, whiffing and grounding out to short, respectively.

By the sixth inning Berto was a homer shy of the cycle but the Raccoons were no closer to a single stinking W in Sacramento, refusing to reach base outside of from the #1 hole. The game receded into the distance in the bottom 6th with David Fernandez on the mound. Triolo made a stupid error to begin with, but Fernandez walked a guy, threw a wild pitch, and lacked basically any nice qualities before he got smacked for two unearned runs on a Greenway sac fly and a Hollenbeck single… Bojorques was also out of the game by then, and once again the Raccoons wouldn’t beat a completely overmatched starter on another team. They were no less awful in the last three innings than in the middle three innings, and ended up being swept by a last-place team. 8-4 Scorpions. Ramos 3-5, 3B, 2B; Morales 2-5, 2B, RBI; Stalker 2-4, 2 2B, RBI;

In other news

May 5 – Career Thunder Luis Sagredo (.224, 1 HR, 5 RBI) agrees to a trade to the Bayhawks, who send two prospects to Oklahoma.
May 5 – The Falcons beat the Thunder, 10-7, on the strength of a 9-spot in the fifth inning.
May 8 – The Indians give up on the season already, sending venerable veteran Pablo Sanchez (.268, 1 HR, 4 RBI) to the Capitals for C Elliott Thompson (.267, 0 HR, 2 RBI) and a prospect.
May 9 – The Loggers rally past the Cyclones for a 14-8 win, scoring 10 runs in the eighth inning. MIL OF Will Ojeda (.287, 1 HR, 9 RBI) has four hits and 2 RBI from the #8 spot.
May 10 – The Blue Sox pump out 17 base hits in a regulation game and still come up losers, 7-5 against the Titans. Nashville leaves 11 on base with 16 singles and one double to their names, while the Titans score their seven runs from 10 hits and seven walks.

Complaints and stuff

For the Crusaders series we used twice Morales and once Vickers as cleanup batter. Both have eight career homers. Somehow, we still got the sweep, but I struggle to explain why and how and what it all means. By Sunday, Ed Hooge (7 HR) was hitting cleanup… If you grade signs of trouble, this is an A+ that things are going to turn hard south soon…

None of that got better this week either, with the Raccoons not hitting a single dinger. Well, who’d hit them…? (buries striped face in paws)

The other options for Myers’ injury replacement (…) would have been Vince Lutch and Yukitsura Hirai, two 25-year-old versatile infielders, but both right-handed, and Hirai was rather clumsy. Edgar Barrios, technically, counted as lefty alternative, but he was 30 and struggled to hit a lick in St. Pete…

Fun Fact: Manny Fernandez is in the top 5 of many offensive categories in the Continental League and ranks 3rd in WAR by batters in the CL.

Now, WAR is a useless stat, but Fernandez seems to merit being the #5 selection in the 2031 draft by now. He never broke into the top 50 in the prospect rankings, but bee-lined to the majors in less than two years and after some above-average but not jaw-dropping results in his first almost-three-full-seasons, he seems poised for the big breakout at age 26 (which isn’t too late, I claim). His best season was last year when he was in 148 games (120 starts) with a .286/.333/.418 clip, 12 HR, 75 RBI, and stole 22 bases. He got 4.9 WAR that year.

Right now he’s projected for a .333/.371/.516 campaign with 27 HR, 97 RBI and 22 sacks again, but with 8.8 WAR!

But knowing our luck he’ll break a few vertebrae tumbling down the gangway on the return to Portland and then get wheelchair advice from Cristiano…….