[Westheim]

Raccoons (5-7) vs. Crusaders (5-7) – April 17-19, 2046

After a week of getting pushed and shoved around and stepped on the tails and robbed of some stripes, the Raccoons returned home, licked their wounds, and waited for the Crusaders to show up on Tuesday. They were not scoring runs, second from the bottom in the league, but at least they weren’t routinely exploding with their pitching either, sitting sixth in runs allowed with a -7 run differential (Coons: +3). They had beaten us in the season series last year, 10-8, but at least we had taken the division ahead of them. Right now, we were both tied for fourth, three games behind the Loggers (the Indians had fallen out of the 3-way tie from week’s end on Monday, losing to the damn Elks).

Projected matchups:
Jake Jackson (0-1, 1.38 ERA) vs. Paul Paris (0-1, 5.00 ERA)
Victor Merino (1-0, 2.08 ERA) vs. Carlos Malla (0-2, 7.36 ERA)
Jason Wheatley (1-2, 5.68 ERA) vs. Garrett Sutherland (0-0, 4.26 ERA)

Malla was the only southpaw on offer. They also already had quite a few injuries with Matt Peterson, Alex Adame, and Randolph Nash on the DL, and Dan Schneller being day-to-day, probably with old man pains. The Coons skipped Okuda after two days off and two horrendous starts to open his season.

Game 1
NYC: 3B Riario – C Alba – 2B Briones – 1B D. Hernandez – CF Rogers – LF Rico – RF Foss – SS Gates – P Paris
POR: LF Baskins – CF Herrera – 3B Maldonado – 1B Toohey – RF Fernandez – SS Waters – C Morales – 2B Carreno – P Jackson

Fernando Alba doubled, Mario Briones singled, and the Raccoons trailed again in the first inning. Before long, Jake Jackson was written up for going to two strikes on everybody, and putting nobody away, which, along with other things that made me stark raving mad, led to two more (unearned) runs in the third inning as the Crusaders kept clipping away for singles, starting with pitcher Paul Paris in that inning, and when the Raccoons got a potential 6-4-3 inning-ender served up, Waters tossed that past Carreno for an error instead. Then a Dave Hernandez sac fly and Phil Rogers’ RBI double grew the gap to 3-0. A Maldonado home run to left briefly shortened the score in the bottom 3rd, but Prince Gates singled, stole second, and scored on another Paris single in the top 4th to get the Crusaders up to three runs out again.

Bottom 4th, Waters opened with a single to right, stole second, and was singled home by Tony Morales, 4-2. Carreno’s grounder escaped between the converging Briones and Hernandez for another single, and Jackson bunted the runners into scoring position for Baskins and with one out. Both Baskins and Herrera, though, popped out on the infield, and the chance was pissed away again. Instead, the Crusaders put a 3-spot on Jackson in the fifth. A single, a Manny Fernandez error, finally a 2-out, 2-run triple by Danny Rico. Then Chuck Jones appeared, and plated Rico with a wild pitch. Jones faced three more batters to begin the sixth inning – all reached base. Paul Paris slugged a double, Vittorio Riario reached on an infield single, and Fernando Alba clubbed an RBI single to right. It didn’t look like it back then, but that was the final run in the game, as the Crusades decided to save the rest of the bushel for Wednesday, while the Raccoons looked entirely discordant with reality, but still managed to strand six base runners in the last four innings. 9-2 Crusaders. Pellicano (PH) 1-1; Maldonado 2-5, HR, RBI; Morales 1-2, 2 BB, RBI; Carreno 2-4; Ibold 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 1 K;

Six losses in a row, and the first bomb went off on Tuesday night. With a 20.25 ERA from seven appearances, a 4.50 WHIP, a scouting report that promised more to come, and not even a single ******* strikeout to his credit, the Raccoons front office called in Chuck Jones, their impregnable lefty for six years, from the locker room after the game and told him to fly to St. Petersburg. He had already been put on waivers.

There was no useful left-hander in AAA right now, so Sean Marucci was added to the roster.

Game 2
NYC: 3B Riario – C J. Ortiz – 2B Briones – 1B D. Hernandez – RF Willie Ojeda – CF Rico – LF J. Simmons – SS Gates – P Malla
POR: LF Baskins – CF Herrera – 3B Maldonado – 1B Toohey – SS Waters – RF Pellicano – C Gonzalez – 2B Carreno – P Merino

Waters hit a double in the bottom 2nd and scored on a Pellicano single, giving the Raccoons the rarest of treasures, a 1-0 lead. The Coons would also have two on with one out in the bottom 2nd, which Carreno solved with a double play grounder, and two in scoring position after Herrera and Maldonado hits with two outs in the bottom 3rd, but Toohey then struck out. The Crusaders, who had lost Phil Rogers to an injury in the ninth inning on Tuesday, saw Briones go down to a knee injury trying to field a ball in the third on Wednesday, but somehow kept finding new bodies, with Sean Calais to fill in at the keystone in this contest. He promptly singled his first time up, stole second, and was at third base in that fourth inning, with two outs and a 2-2 count on Hernandez. Merino unraveled from there, plating the tying run with a wild pitch before walking Hernandez, filled the bags with an Ojeda single and a walk to Danny Rico, and conceded the go-ahead run against Justin Simmons. Somehow, anyhow, Toohey picked a grounder for the third out after that, but FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.

Yelling made no difference. Merino melted down for good in the fifth, loading the bases with a single and two walks, then walked in a run against Ojeda. Rico hit an RBI single. Simmons struck out, the first K for Merino in this ******* *** **** start. Gates flew out to Herrera, concluding five decrepit innings once more. Marucci was in the game by the sixth, allowed a leadoff single to the ******* opposing pitcher, which was something I was getting really tired of seeing, then somehow weaseled around that without giving up another run. The Coons, down 4-1, put the tying runs on base with one out in their half of the sixth, with hits by Herrera and Toohey, plus Waters walking. Pellicano and Gonzalez both popped out to the ******* Crusaders catcher. A Hernandez homer off Marucci made it 5-1 in the seventh, while the Raccoons arrived at the same unhappy place in the eighth inning, except that the tying run, Pellicano was now at the plate with one out, and with Herrera, Toohey, and Waters on base. However – Malla was gone. Righty John Steuer had put Waters aboard after Julian Ponce had walked the first two runners. Manny Fernandez and Pat Gurney had already been used, but Nelson Mercado was there to hit for Pellicano. He struck out. Tony Morales batted for Gonzalez and hit an RBI single up the middle, which was at least something else than utter and complete failure. Then Carreno bounced out to short, stranding the tying runs. Aaron Hickey pitched two scoreless at the end of regulation here, then was hit for to begin the bottom 9th by the last Coon on the bench, Al Martell, who singled off lefty Mike Lynn. From here, they had to go in order. Baskins struck out. Herrera hit into a fielder’s choice. Lynn walked Maldonado, so Toohey came up as the tying run with two outs. He grounded out to Gates. 5-2 Crusaders. Waters 2-3, BB, 2B; Pellicano 2-3, RBI; Morales (PH) 1-1, RBI; Martell (PH) 1-1; Hickey 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 0 K;

Seven losses in a row.

Game 3
NYC: 3B Riario – C Alba – 2B Schneller – 1B D. Hernandez – RF Willie Ojeda – LF Garris – CF Rico – SS Gates – P Sutherland
POR: 1B Gurney – CF Herrera – 3B Maldonado – RF Toohey – LF Fernandez – SS Waters – C Morales – 2B Martell – P Wheatley

Wheatley had gotten it into the snout the last time out, which was not any way to distinguish our starters right now, but at least allowed only one hit the first time through, and no runs. He also didn’t get anybody out on strikes, and the defense did most of the work. No Raccoon even reached base in the first three innings against Sutherland. Dan Schneller became the first K for Wheatley in the fourth, which was an unusual sight, but the future Hall of Fame candidate appeared as much over the hill as Chuck Jones at this point. Armando Herrera had the first Coons hit in the same inning, singling to left, then stole second base. When Maldo singled to center, Danny Rico was trapped between playing it safe and being a hero, and instead only nabbed a Silly Fool ribbon for his uniform, falling over the bouncing ball for an RBI single and an error.

The Coons declined the invitation to tack on after the error, but did get some more in the fifth. Armando Herrera doubled off the fence with Martell and Gurney in scoring position, cashing them both with a double, 3-0. Sutherland hit Maldonado, but Toohey grounded out to Gates at short, completing five frames. Wheats meanwhile maintained a wonky shutout, but at least got better in the middle innings and made some good pitches rather than good defense behind him work. Bottom 6th then, the Coons had their 5-6-7 on base with nobody out against Sutherland. Martell hit a sac fly, and Wheats hit into a double play… The scene repeated in the bottom 7th, with the 1-2-3 now reaching in order on a single and two walks. Sutherland was only yanked after walking in a run against Toohey on four pitches, with additional runs scoring on lefty Jordan Calderon’s walk to Manny, a Waters sac fly, and – after Morales walked – a Schneller error on Martell’s grounder. Wheats struck out, Gurney popped out, so nobody got a hit with a runner in scoring position in that inning, but we still scored four runs. While the Coons reached double digits when Waters doubled home Mercado and Manny against Lazaro Ochoa in the bottom 8th, Wheats was still going in the late innings, and tried to nip a shutout…! He entered the ninth on 92 pitches, facing the 3-4-5 hitters. He struck out Schneller as well as Hernandez, then handled a comebacker by Ojeda to finish the game. 10-0 Raccoons. Herrera 2-3, BB, 2B, 2 RBI; Waters 2-4, 2 2B, 3 RBI; Wheatley 9.0 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 6 K, W (2-2);

Fourth career shutout for Wheatley, and just when we needed it the most!

Raccoons (6-9) vs. Falcons (10-6) – April 20-22, 2046

The Falcons had opened the year in first place and were scoring the most runs in the league (6.3 per game!), but were also bleeding runs at an accelerated rate, ninth in runs allowed overall. The +31 run differential was impressive for week 3, though. Besides, a prolific offense is not what our staff can cope with right now… We won the season series last year, 5-4.

Projected matchups:
Ryan Person (1-1, 3.94 ERA) vs. Oscar Flores (0-1, 4.05 ERA)
Sadaharu Okuda (0-2, 7.94 ERA) vs. Adam Messer (2-1, 3.57 ERA)
Jake Jackson (0-2, 3.57 ERA) vs. Justin Kaiser (3-0, 2.76 ERA)

Southpaw Sunday! Perfect timing for a team with only one lefty in the rotation.

Charlotte had a few injuries, too, with Ed Haertling on the DL, Chris Kokoszka in limbo, and Tony Aparicio day-to-day and uncertain at least for the opener.

Game 1
CHA: 2B M. Martinez – 3B E. Sandoval – LF Besaw – SS Aparicio – RF Turley – 1B Allegood – C N. Evans – CF Marroguin – P O. Flores
POR: 1B Gurney – CF Herrera – 3B Maldonado – LF Toohey – SS Waters – RF Mercado – 2B Martell – C Gonzalez – P Person

Person entered with 14 walks in 16 innings, pitched behind to virtually everybody, but somehow didn’t allow early runs despite scattering three singles and a walk to the other team’s pitcher in the first three innings. He didn’t get a K until he whiffed Nate Evans to end the fourth, while the Raccoons followed the basic premise of “do less, get less” offensively, behind held to a sad single until Flores slipped a bit and issued consecutive walks to Maldo and Toohey with one out in the bottom 4th. Matt Waters had no patience and singled to right on the first pitch, but Maldo hadn’t been ready for that and had to hold at third base. Nelson Mercado struck out in a full count, while Al Martell was ahead 3-1, then grounded out to Miguel Martinez.

The Coons arrived in a pinch in the bottom 6th of the still scoreless game, when with two outs Mercado and Martell singled and Flores followed that up with a nailer into Ruben Gonzalez. Person was obviously next. We weren’t keen on lifting him after six, but he was also a prototypically hitting pitcher and we kinda needed the runs. Manny Fernandez batted for him, got hit by Flores, and that pushed the game’s first run across. WHATEVER WORKS! (clonks bottle of booze on the table) Gurney struck out, stranding a full set, with Zack Kelly getting two outs to begin the seventh before walking Jordan Marroguin. With righty Sean Watson out to bat for Flores, Nelson Moreno came on and got an easy groundout to reach stretch time. Then the baseball gods had another chuckle; for the eighth, the Falcons put the tying runs on the corners in form of Miguel Martinez and Joe Besaw, both of which reached by infield singles…! Whyyyy. However, the baseball gods also hated the Falcons, or loved to toy with them, too, or whatever – Tony Aparicio, somewhat lame-legged, spanked a 1-1 pitch back to Moreno for a perfect 1-6-3 double play, and the inning ended, Portland still up by a skinny run. They added a second one off Steve McKeny in the bottom 8th, with Martell reaching, stealing second, and scoring on a pinch-hit single by Derek Baskins in the #9 hole. And with that, it came: a save opportunity for Josh Rella…! We had waited a while for that! In fact, Rella was so bored (having tossed a meaningless inning on Tuesday most recently) that he appeared on the mound with his shirt on backwards, having been scrambled from the ballpark’s tanning booth. Archie Turley, Mike Allegood, and Nate Evans went down in order. 2-0 Critters. Gurney 3-5; Waters 2-4; Martell 2-4; Baskins (PH) 1-1, RBI;

The Falcons got more bad news than one shutout by Saturday, finding out that catcher Chris Kokoszka (.396, 0 HR, 8 RBI) was out for the year with a torn posterior cruciate ligament.

Game 2
CHA: 2B M. Martinez – 3B Watanabe – LF BEsaw – SS Aparicio – RF Turley – 1B Allegood – C Herbert – CF Marroquin – P Messer
POR: 1B Gurney – CF Herrera – 3B Maldonado – C Morales – SS Waters – LF Fernandez – RF Mercado – 2B Martell – P Okuda

The weather was iffy, and so seemed Okuda, giving up a double to Miguel Martinez to begin the game. The often-injured phenom strained an intercostal (whatever the heck that was) on the play and had to leave the game and head for the DL right away. Esteban Sandoval took over for him. Sandoval scored on Shintaro Watanabe’s single, and the Falcons landed three straight hits before finally striking out 1-2-3. Okuda struck out Omar Marroquin (MarroQuin – not related to Jordan MarroGuin!), then walked Messer (!!), and then allowed four straight hits for another two singles. I laughed nervously, but failed to self-suffocate with a pillow.

Rain then held Okuda to four ****** innings before Hickey allowed two more runs on four hits in the sixth as the game gradually swam away from the Raccoons once more, who at the midway point were down 5-0 in runs and 11-2 in hits. No, once again the Raccoons had to settle for the highlight of the game being scoreless long relief by some bullpen bum, in this case Sean Marucci, who pitched three hitless innings, heroically, and pointlessly. The team never rallied; in fact, they never even got a third base hit. 5-0 Falcons. Herrera 2-3; Marucci 3.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 4 K;

Game 3
CHA: 1B Allegood – 2B E. Sandoval – LF Besaw – SS Aparicio – RF Turley – CF Marroguin – 3B Watanabe – C Herbert – P Kaiser
POR: RF Pellicano – CF Herrera – 3B Maldonado – 1B Toohey – SS Waters – LF Fernandez – C Gonzalez – 2B Carreno – P Jackson

Manny Fernandez flew out to Archie Turley in deep right to end the bottom 1st, stranding Maldonado, Toohey, and Waters, then hit another deep fly to left in the bottom 3rd with Herrera and Waters on base and two outs, and was denied again, now by Joe Besaw. Agony. Jake Jackson pitched four no-hit innings to begin the game, but had to draw first blood himself, plating Ruben Gonzalez with a grounder to right to get the first run on the board after Gonzalez singled, advanced on a wild pitch and Carreno’s grounder, and while I had little hope or confidence. Jackson added a fifth no-hit inning before the Falcons once more got all their hits at once, although the downfall started with a Maldonado error (already sounds familiar) and a walk to Allegood. After that the Falcons broke down the ballpark with three fat base hits, with Sandoval flipping the score already with a 2-run double. Besaw singled him home, and a fourth run would score on Turley’s single.

The Raccoons, down 4-1, stood, watched, and admired, while I marked an L into the pocket schedule already. And that is what we deserved, but there was another twist up the baseball god’s game plan. The bottom 7th should have ended after a Derek Baskins single with two outs, when Herrera grounded out to Aparicio – but Aparicio fumbled the ball for an error. Maldonado was next. Facing right-hander Kyle Conner, he fell 0-2 behind, then cranked a 395-footer to right-center to tie the game at once. After Moreno had a scoreless eighth then, Herrera held the game together for Rella in the ninth. Jordan Marroguin (not: Marroquin) hit a bloop single with one out, then stole second. When Watanabe hit a sharper single to center, Marroguin was sent around with the go-ahead run, but was thrown out by Herrera, and Herrera then also caught a Nate Evans liner to end the inning, giving Portland a chance to walk off in regulation. Carreno grounded out against McKeny, but Mercado singled in the #9 hole. Rella was hit for by Pat Gurney in the #1 spot, but Mercado stole second base on the first pitch by McKeny, who struck out Gurney eventually. Herrera was not done with making the $4.7M all worth it, though – batting with two outs he waited til 2-2 for his pitch, then singled to right-center. Mercado ran on contact and scored, walking off the Critters. 5-4 Raccoons! Baskins (PH) 1-1; Herrera 2-4, BB, RBI; Maldonado 2-4, HR, 2B, 3 RBI;

In other news

April 16 – A 3-hit shutout by TOP SP Carlos Vasquez (1-1, 4.35 ERA) defeats the Capitals, 9-0.
April 20 – The Gold Sox beat the Cyclones, 6-3 in 17 innings, but the more impressive individual hitting results are found on the losing team. Cincy’s Chris Strohm (.409, 1 HR, 10 RBI) hits 5-for-8, while teammate Alvin Zuazo (.274, 2 HR, 12 RBI) drives in all Cincy runs on three hits.
April 20 – IND OF/1B Bill Quinteros (.283, 1 HR, 11 RBI) will miss two weeks with a finger sprain.
April 22 – Blue Sox OF/1B Mike Harmon (.257, 2 HR, 8 RBI) could miss a month with an elbow sprain.

FL Player of the Week: DAL OF/1B Omar Gonzalez (.395, 0 HR, 9 RBI), batting .522 (12-23) with 5 RBI
CL Player of the Week: VAN OF Jerry Outram (.387, 2 HR, 10 RBI), smashing .524 (11-21) with 2 HR, 6 RBI

Complaints and stuff

Chuck Jones cleared waivers and accepted his assignment to AAA on Friday, which is how you know they smelled it too. We are in the market for a new lefty reliever now, though.

As well as for a few starters, and some offense, and defense, and at this rate I will also chew off my claws and need something else to scratch the doorframe with.

Thunder and Loggers next week, although we have no trouble to look bad against anybody.

Fun Fact: The only ABL player from Luxembourg was Portland’s own Johan Dolder.

The right-handed outfielder was truly nothing special compared to the rest of the league. He was an Original Raccoon that hit .203/.270/.275 for his career, with four home runs (all in 1977) and 41 RBI. The Original Raccoons were so bad, this defensively unremarkable Luxembourger managed to get 448 plate appearances while hitting .209/.275/.284 that year. There was a reason why we were the dullest bulb in the chandelier in the league’s early years.

Dolder was wrapped up in a garbage trade with the Crusaders in January 1980. He made only one more major league appearance with them in 1981, then disappeared into obscurity. The Raccoons got various other disappointments in that trade, including Pedro Hermundo and Jayson Bowling. The latter was on the roster all through 1984, thus being part of a pennant winner in 1983 (although he hit just as little as Dolder), then was flipped for three prospects, none of whom reached the majors. Hermundo at least was wrapped up in a deal for Jack Pennington, who was flicked at the 1981 deadline for dead-ended Mark Dawson from Topeka, who broke out in Portland and won a home run title the following year, and played for the Coons for a decade.

So Johan Dolder was not entirely bad – he gave the Raccoons a true slugger, around six corners or so.

This concludes the set on only-one-from-X players. There is currently no professional minor leaguer that would join the set any time soon.