Portland Raccoons (ABL)

[GoodOlKevin]

Do you manage all your games?

[Westheim]

Originally Posted by GoodOlKevin

Do you manage all your games?

All games are played out in one-pitch mode. Of the 6,413 games the Critters have played so far, I have only simmed three, and all accidentally, including - unfortunately - back then the major league debut of Jong-hoo Umberger.

Playing out games makes the pain that much more real.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (1-5) vs. Falcons (4-2) – April 11-13, 2016

I woke up on Monday, and it was true: the Raccoons had won but one game in 2016 so far. Things had to change. In town would be the Falcons for three games before our first proper off day, and they held a tie for the CL South lead, and the Coons had also lost the last two season series, including a 4-5 disappointment in 2015.

Projected matchups:
Nick Brown (0-1, 5.14 ERA) vs. Pablo Sanchez (1-0, 3.00 ERA)
Hector Santos (0-0, 1.29 ERA) vs. Bobby Guerrero (0-0)
Tadasu Abe (1-0, 1.42 ERA) vs. Ron Carter (1-0, 2.57 ERA)

The Falcons had already suffered a blow, losing SP Max Shepherd (1-1, 8.71 ERA) to bone chips in his elbow, which would cost him at least four months of the season. Shepherd had led the Federal League in ERA as a Wolf in 2011, but ever since coming to Charlotte, he had been plagued by misery. With that, their rotation was already in disarray, with potential starter Dave Beebe (0-0, 0.00 ERA) having pitched in relief when Shepherd went down on Saturday. It looks highly unlikely, however, for us to see a left-handed starter in this series, unless they bring someone up from AAA.

Game 1
CHA: SS P. Hall – CF E. Hernandez – C Holliman – 1B Quebell – RF Mugan – 2B F. Soto – LF J. Jimenez – 3B Best – P P. Sanchez
POR: CF Carmona – SS Sambrano – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 2B Jones – C Baca – P Brown

Both teams had only a single the first time through the order, with the Coons’ being Cookie’s, and Cookie almost immediately was caught stealing, dropping him to 0/3 on the year, and the Coons to 0/4. A Francisco Soto single in the second inning for the Falcons didn’t yield something countable, either, and their next runner was Adrian Quebell being hit by Brownie in the fourth. Quebell came in batting .250 with 5 RBI, which ironically would lead the Fuzzies. Matt Nunley would tie his mark in the bottom of the inning, however, walloping a fastball out of rightfield for a solo shot and a 1-0 lead for the home team. For a moment it looked like Adam Young might back-to-back with Nunley, but his drive was caught on the track by Juan Jimenez. In a pitching duel, there was not much offense to be had. Brown, who pitched a fine control game and fed balls to his middle infielders, issued 2-out walks in the fifth and sixth, but the Falcons didn’t do anything with those, while the Coons didn’t get back on base until Sambrano reached on an infield single with two outs in the bottom 6th. At least that brought up Nunley, whose .273 batting average was the best in the lineup, which was not exactly a mark of excellence with two guys batting squid, and three more soundly under .200 …

In the event, Nunley flew out to center, ending the inning, but the Falcons got their biggest chance yet when Soto hit a 1-out double past DeWeese in the top 7th. Jimenez popped out to short, and then the Falcons hit Dave Carter, a right-hander, for Steve Best, who was a left-hander, but had gotten off to a hot start and was hitting over .500! Carter struck out, and Brownie maintained a 2-hit shutout through seven, and on a reasonable pitch count, too. Some more offense would be swell, however. That was when Young and DeWeese went back-to-back with home runs to right in the bottom 7th, hit off Sanchez and Johnny Watson, respectively. That made it 3-0, and what did the Falcons have? An infield single by Paul Hall with one out in the eighth and then the first ball hit hard off Brownie in a long while, which was a single to right by Eddie Hernandez, which chased Hall to third base. Brown remained in for Ryan Holliman (and mainly Adrian Quebell after him), but the inning came to a conclusion quickly when Holliman grounded to short and Sandy Sambrano started the double play. The bottom 8th amounted to a Nunley double play, and with Quebell starting the top 9th, Nick Brown – on 93 pitches – remained in the game. No point in going to Thrasher, who hadn’t exactly excelled so far. After Quebell was the switch-hitter Mugan (who was not very good against southpaws), then the pitcher’s spot. Quebell grounded out to his significant other, Young. Brownie sneezed out Mugan, and at 100 pitches had to face right-handed pinch-hitter Domingo Nieves. He sent the 0-1 pitch to the left side, Nunley over, spinning, throwing – out! 3-0 Brownies!!! Carmona 2-4; Brown 9.0 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 6 K, W (1-1);

BROOOOOOWWW-………….-NIIIIIIEEEEEEE!!!!!

That’s now 16 career shutouts, and at least one per year since 2011. 2010 was ironically the year he last won 20 games, but never pitched a complete game, the only season in which he didn’t do that (outside of his late-season debut in 2001).

Todd von Lindenthal collected the rest of the pitching staff after the game and yelled at them, red-headed. “You see what that old sucker just did?? WHY CAN’T YOU ****S PITCH LIKE THAT???”

Let’s see whether Hector Santos, the chronic failer with no run support, got the message!

Game 2
CHA: LF E. Hernandez – CF Huibregtse – 1B Quebell – C Holliman – RF Mugan – SS P. Hall – 2B Best – 3B Pellot – P B. Guerrero
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 2B Jones – C Baca – P Santos

Pitchers with short stamina don’t dig stupid errors, so when Steve Huibregtse singled in the first and Howard Jones dropped Quebell’s patented pathetic pop, Santos gave him the same look that Nick Brown had always given Ricardo Martinez. This one didn’t snowball, fortunately, as the Falcons popped themselves out of the inning with more qualified personnel (Baca f.e.) making the actual catches. The Coons again scored first, and again on a solo homer (pattern developing…) when Ron Richards hit his first of the year in the bottom 2nd, also jumping over that dreaded .100 mark.

Richards was the hero again in the bottom 4th, plating Nunley, who had doubled, with a 2-out single after Young had grounded out and DeWeese had whiffed. Before that, Quebell had hit the Falcons’ second hit in the top of the fourth, an infield single. The extra run quickly evaporated on Steve Best’s first dinger of the year in the top of the fifth, as runs tended to be scarce and only come on loud, lonely cracks in this series. Baca hit the next one, though his one didn’t go out, finding about the deepest part of the park in right center, but he still cruised into second with a leadoff double in the bottom 5th. Santos lined to Best, who made a dropping grab, then doubled Baca off second base.

Yep, and still 154 games to play! … (shakes head) … Cookie then reached on an infield single, stole his first base on Holliman’s throwing error, and went to third before McKnight walked, but now Nunley struck out. The Coons would get their next insurance run in the following inning, running the score to 3-1 on – wait for it – another solo homer by Ron Richards. Santos went seven and was approaching 100 pitches, so he was hit for by Ochoa to start the bottom 7th. Ochoa hit a Guerrero pitch hard, but into an out to centerfielder Steve Huibregtse. Cookie then singled (leaving sub-.200 territory) and moved over on a wild pitch. Nunley’s grounder was thrown away by Paul Hall, and Cookie was allowed to score from second on the 2-base throwing error, 4-1. The donated run turned out to be superfluous; Manobu Sugano and Ron Thrasher allowed no runners in collecting the last six outs. 4-1 Critters. Carmona 2-4; Richards 3-3, 2 HR, 3 RBI; Jones 0-1, 3 BB; Santos 7.0 IP, 3 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 7 K, W (1-0);

Game 3
CHA: LF E. Hernandez – CF Huibregtse – 1B Quebell – C Holliman – RF Mugan – SS P. Hall – 2B Best – 3B Pellot – P R. Carter
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – C Margolis – 2B Bergquist – P Abe

DeWeese plated a run without going deep for the first time since wearing the brown hat, plating Nunley with a 2-out RBI single in the first inning, which also sent the Raccoons onto the board first for the third time in the set. Abe was perfect the first time through the order, striking out half a dozen, but Huibregtse hit a 1-out double in the fourth to become the tying run. Then Quebell hit a duck snort that didn’t do a lot and belched it out of centerfield to flip the score in favor of the Falcons, 2-1. The home crowd was rightfully reserved in their reaction. Down 2-1, they then saw DeWeese hit a leadoff double to right in the bottom of the same inning, and also saw him scored after Richards grounded out and Margolis hit a fly ball to deep-enough center to bring him home to tie the game. Top 5th, Cookie misfielded Steve Best’s leadoff single into the go-ahead run standing at second base, but Abe got Alfonso Pellot to pop out, a grounder from Ron Carter, and whiffed Hernandez to end the inning with Best at third base. The strikeouts kept flowing for Abe. He reached ten in the sixth, and struck out Jimenez and Soto in the seventh to reach a dozen in his second ABL start!

The Coons had yet to give him another lead, however. They certainly did anything but in the bottom 7th, and Abe struck out Ron Carter and Quebell (with a Huibregtse single in between) in the eighth. That got him to 14 K, but also to almost 110 pitches. C’mon boys! Move those striped tails now. Nope, they didn’t amount to more than a Young single in the bottom 8th. Abe’s interpreter told Todd von Lindenthal how Abe had once thrown 362 pitches in three days in a youth tournament in Japan, and how this was nothing for him. They actually talked him into staying in the game, and he started the ninth by whiffing Ryan Holliman! The crowd was well into it by now, but was disappointed to see Troy Mugan pop out easily. Soto was next, singled on the first pitch, and now the fun was over. Beaver was going to come in to face Best, since the Falcons had already showed they didn’t care about Best’s batting average and Sugano could be hurt by a right-handed pinch-hitter. Best stayed this time (…), hit a poor dropper right in front of the batter’s box, but Margolis’ throw to first was wild and almost decapitated the first base umpire! The Falcons got runners on second and third, an intentional walk to Dave Carter, and then the Critters got a new pitcher in Chris Mathis, who retired Domingo Nieves on the first pitch, a grounder to third, leaving the bases loaded.

Margolis led off the bottom 9th, but grounded out. Ochoa hit for Bergquist and singled, and then Sambrano hit for Mathis and walked. Cookie grounded to Quebell, who missed it, and the bases were loaded with one out for McKnight, who was ribbieless in 2016. That changed; he flew to left, Hernandez caught the ball, but his throw home was poor as Ochoa took off and scored easily. 3-2 Raccoons! Carmona 2-5; Nunley 2-4; DeWeese 3-4, 2B, RBI; Ochoa (PH) 1-1; Abe 8.2 IP, 5 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 15 K;

Raccoons (4-5) @ Crusaders (4-5) – April 15-17, 2016

So, neither of these teams got the start they hoped for. We actually both started 0-3, getting swept in the opening series (the Crusaders by the Indians). Their rotation is the worst in the CL early on, they have no stolen bases, they have the second-worst batting average, and the worst defense. Actually, 4-5 is an achievement for them. I also know that none of this will be important when they hoist another trophy in six months. We beat them 11-7 last season, not that it helped us any.

Projected matchups:
A.J. Bartels (0-1, 15.00 ERA) vs. Edgar Cardoso (0-1, 20.25 ERA)
Jonathan Toner (0-2, 4.85 ERA) vs. Jaylen Martin (1-1, 3.38 ERA)
Nick Brown (1-1, 2.25 ERA) vs. Curtis Tobitt (0-1, 7.20 ERA)

Not many of these starters have gotten a good slide into the season. In fact, outside of Brownie, who erased his meh first outing with a shutout, it’s been a bit of a mess for all of them. Also, still no left-handed starter, but we’ll get them. There are six in rotations of division rivals, including two on the Titans that we just didn’t see back then.

Game 1
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 2B H. Jones – C Baca – P Bartels
NYC: 3B Rivas – SS Walter – LF M. Ortíz – 1B Manfull – RF W. Jones – C Lowe – 2B J. Ortega – CF Brissett – P Cardoso

These pitchers had allowed 11 runs in 5.2 innings combined in their first outings, so of course this game was scoreless after three and Bartels still had a no-hitter going. Ronnie McKnight would dust the cobwebs off the scoreboard with a leadoff jack in the top 4th, putting the Coons ahead with the first run for the fourth time this week. For Cardoso, things slowly got worse: Howard Jones hit a leadoff double in the fifth, and Baca singled. Bartels grounded out, moving Baca to second base, and Cookie singled to right to move the score to 2-0 and Baca to third base. McKnight was in a 3-0 count when he swung and hit a pitch to deep center – unfortunately Amari Brissett was no Jose Paraz and made the catch, but at least this one scored another run on the sac fly, 3-0. Nunley grounded out, ending the inning, while Bartels’ no-hit bid didn’t end until the bottom 5th when Drew Lowe homered to get the Crusaders into both the R and H columns, with a pair of 1’s.

Top 6th: the Coons loaded the bases on singles by DeWeese, Richards, and Jones, bringing up Baca with one out, but the backstop backed out after a strikeout. That brought up Bartels with two down, not exactly swell conditions for more offense, but Cardoso had the nerves and his first pitch missed Lowe completely and allowed DeWeese to cruise home, 4-1. Bartels would get to 2-0 before hitting a sorry floater to shallow center BUT IT FELL IN!! Brissett and Shane Walter converged, neither got it, and Bartels had a 2-out, 2-run single, while Cardoso was yanked by New York. Tommy Costello replaced him and conceded the Bartels run on consecutive singles by Cookie and McKnight, 7-1 in the middle of the sixth. The Crusaders now made hard contact off Bartels twice in the bottom 6th, but both times flew out, had nothing in the seventh, and in the eighth hit two sorry bloopers for singles before Bartels drilled Jorge Ortega to be chased with the bases loaded and nobody out. Sugano came on and got a quick bouncer to Howard Jones from Amari Brissett, resulting in two outs and a run scored. Jim Brulhart pinch-hit now, 38 years old and far removed from being any good. He hadn’t had a full-time gig since 2012 with the Buffaloes. He was a righty, but one I’d dare to have Sugano pitch to. Brulhart saw three balls, then yanked a pitch to left for an RBI double. We now put Alex Rivas on intentionally to have Sugano face Shane Walter, who grounded out, but this inning hadn’t quite gone to plan… The Crusaders’ heart of the order went down quickly in the ninth, though. 7-3 Coons! Carmona 2-5, RBI; McKnight 2-4, HR, 3 RBI; DeWeese 3-4; Jones 2-4, 2B; Baca 2-4; Bartels 7.0 IP, 3 H, 3 R, 3 ER, 1 BB, 4 K, W (1-1) and 1-4, 2 RBI;

Saturday, weather got in the way. The middle game was postponed and a double header scheduled for Sunday. Between Jonny Toner and Brownie there probably wasn’t much difference, the bullpen was well rested and everybody was available, and my usual rule of having the better guy go first didn’t apply. Pitchers remained in their previously assigned order thus, and the Crusaders also stuck to “Midnight” Martin in the first leg of the double header. We’d rotate the personnel a bit for the two games (but – ssshh! – Sandy Sambrano had been in the lineup card for Saturday, that I didn’t show anyone, just as well).

Game 2
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Sambrano – 2B H. Jones – RF Ochoa – C Baca – P Toner
NYC: 2B Caraballo – 3B Rivas – LF M. Ortíz – 1B Manfull – RF W. Jones – C Lowe – SS J. Ortega – CF Brissett – P J. Martin

The bad weather hadn’t moved far; it drizzled in the second inning, but soon stopped. Like Bartels on Friday, Jonny was perfect the first time through the order, striking out five, but the Raccoons hadn’t done anything fantastic, either. Jonny had drawn a walk in the third inning, though. Francisco Caraballo hit a leadoff single in the bottom 4th, and while Rivas struck out, Martin Ortíz soon found a single, too, with a blooper to center. B.J. Manfull was unhelpful, though, and bounced back to Toner, who started a double play to end the frame. Jonny hit a 2-out single in the top 5th, a bouncer to center, and then stole second base – the first actual, hard-earned steal for the team this year. Cookie walked, but Ortíz made a hero’s play on McKnight’s fly to left center, and the runners were stranded.

The end for Jonny came fast and gruesome again. Caraballo opened the bottom 6th with a double to right center. Rivas hit a single to left, Caraballo made for home and drew a poor throw from DeWeese, moving Rivas to second base. Toner then hit Manfull before Winston Jones’ single swamped him for good. Sugano replaced him and got out of the inning, but allowed a second run on a grounder to Sambrano. The Crusaders threatened again against Chun and Beaver in the bottom 7th, but left two men on when PH Miguel Salinas flew out to center, but “Midnight” wasn’t missing a beat until the eighth, in which McKnight doubled. Martin threw a wild pitch to get him to third with one out, but Nunley popped out. DeWeese walked, and with the tying runs on base we went for the big swipe with two outs and sent Adam Young to bat for Sambrano. Another walk didn’t advance us in any meaningful way, pulling up Howard Jones, who was batting .192 and grounded out to Ortega. The other Jones, Winston, homered off Beaver in the bottom of the inning, and the Coons were beaten. 3-0 Crusaders. Sambrano 2-3;

Ah, blech. And considering that Jonny was the biggest offensive threat in this game… Listen, Brownie. Less than another shutout will just not do here… well, if you could hit a slam……

Although there was a light drizzle moving in again just before the first pitch, which ended up being moved back an hour, during which it started to pour. There wasn’t much more time on Sunday, and travel schedules demanded the Raccoons’ departure. The Nick Brown vs. Curtis Tobitt shootout ended up being washed out.

In other news

April 11 – TOP OF Bill Adams (.367, 1 HR, 5 RBI) continues a 2015 hitting streak for long enough to reach 20 straight games of hitting safely with three hits, including all the hard parts of the cycle, in the Buffaloes’ 12-4 thrashing of the Warriors.
April 11 – Only one start into his Canadiens career, SP Jesus Cabrera (0-0, 10.13 ERA) has to go on the shelf with a torn back muscle. The Canadiens hope to get him back by August.
April 11 – The Blue Sox suffer a terrible rout at the hands of the Gold Sox, getting pummeled 16-0 in Denver. Denver’s Mun-wah Tsung (.333, 2 HR, 7 RBI) drives in four.
April 12 – The Warriors place LF/CF Gil Gross (.150, 1 HR, 6 RBI) on the DL with a rotator cuff strain. He might miss six weeks.
April 14 – The Miners rout the Capitals, 15-3, on 20 hits, including a 7-run eighth inning. Four Miners hit home runs, and Dave Carter (.389, 2 HR, 7 RBI) drives in four.
April 15 – Another hitting streak from 2015 keeps up with the beat, as LAP LF Jimmy Roberts (.469, 4 HR, 15 RBI) extends his streak to 20 games with a pair of singles in the Pacifics’ 10-4 win over the Stars.
April 15 – The Capitals shopped MR Cris Pena (0-0, 3.18 ERA, 1 SV) all winter long and found no takers, but now the Condors strike a deal with them. They also receive #19 prospect SP/MR Tim Dunkin and send LF/RF Will Newman (.200, 0 HR, 0 RBI) to Washington.
April 16 – Topeka’s Bill Adams (.400, 2 HR, 8 RBI) continues to hit like a machine, reaching a 25-game hitting streak with one hit in the Buffaloes’ 4-1 defeat against the Cyclones, a first-inning single. Adams hurt himself afterwards, so this streak might retreat to hibernate soon.
April 17 – ATL SP Stephen Quirion (1-1, 1.06 ERA) 1-hits the Aces in a 5-0 shutout. The only hit for Las Vegas is an Arturo Perez single in the second inning.

Complaints and stuff

That Abe kid! Barely here, and he misses the CL and franchise record for strikeouts by one whiff! The last time a CL pitcher struck out exactly 15? Rod Taylor, then with the Elks, in 2009. It was probably against the Coons, but if it was, I have drunk the memory away.

All the pitchers that struck out 16 batters in a game in the Continental League: Kel Yates (2005, Condors), Curtis Tobitt (twice; 2012 with Titans and 2014 with Thunder), Rod Taylor (Elks, 2014), and Jonny Toner (2015 with the Furballs of course!).

Also of course: 15 K ain’t enough for a W ‘round here. Ask Jonny. He took the loss in his 16 K game. True fact. Sad story.

The rained out game against the Crusaders will not be made up until August, then in the middle of a 13-day string of games and in double-header form.

What else is new? Ha-hah, funny one: at one point this week, Jimmy Oatmeal led the ABL in dingers. Yes, actually.

Well, he can bat .381 now. Back then, burying him in the Ron Alston deal was the best thing we could do. He was not hitting anything in the low minors, and he didn’t start actually meeting baseballs until he was 25. Ron Alston made the Coons contenders then (although they missed the playoffs).

[Westheim]

Raccoons (5-6) @ Indians (10-3) – April 19-21, 2016

How exactly the Indians were the only winning team in the North right now was anybody’s guess, but I was quite sure that it wouldn’t last, one way or another. While the Raccoons were last in runs scored (…) and second in runs allowed, but with zero run differential, the Indians were t-2nd in runs scored, and actually were the only team with less runs allowed than the Critters. How exactly this had happened … oh well. The Coons had already been hopeless against the Indians in 2015, being pelted to a 5-13 rhythm, so there was probably not a lot of hope for this set, either.

Projected matchups:
Nick Brown (1-1, 2.25 ERA) vs. Josh Riley (1-1, 5.68 ERA)
Hector Santos (1-0, 1.29 ERA) vs. Jason Clements (1-1, 1.69 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (1-0, 1.80 ERA) vs. Alejandro Mendez (2-0, 2.53 ERA)

Again three right-handers! And we will not get a southpaw on the weekend either – the Knights don’t have any.

Game 1
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B A. Young – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 2B Jones – C Margolis – P Brown
IND: CF J. Wilson – RF Gilmor – C Padilla – 1B S. Guerra – 2B Tolwith – SS Mathews – LF D. Young – 3B Dawson – P Riley

The Critters took a lead in the oddest way they knew in the top of the second, when Adam Young scored on Ron Richards’ triple into the rightfield corner. The lead didn’t hold up, since Joey Mathews hit an RBI double past Carmona’s reach in the bottom of the inning, chasing home the always annoying Aaron Tolwith, Nick Brown’s special friend when he was with the Loggers* and who had singled earlier. The Indians led the league in offense, and were keen on defending that spot, while the Raccoons would soon again show the ****ty defense that had put them at the bottom of that table in the first half of the last season. The Indians in the bottom 3rd got going on an infield single by John Wilson with one out that I was blaming on Howard Jones. Nick Gilmor then hit a double that was close to a bloop and on which DeWeese and Carmona looked another off. Wilson scored. Brownie, already knowing he had lost about an inning ago, hit Dave Padilla, and Santiago Guerra singled to load the bases. Tolwith hit into a force play at home plate, but Joey Mathews plated another two runs with a liner into the leftfield corner before the Raccoons threw out Tolwith at third base. That put the Raccoons down 4-1, and given their previous track record this season, the damage was certainly fatal. The only Critter to reach base in the middle innings was Adam Young, once on a walk, and once with a homer. That was of course a solo shot and still left Brown trailing, 4-2 after six. Brown held out seven and a third innings, while the previously battered Riley went eight. The Raccoons managed only one more base runner, Howard Jones with a single, before silently expiring. 4-2 Indians. Young 2-3, BB, HR, RBI;

Brown and Tolwith were ejected and suspended a number of years ago for inciting a brawl.

Elsewhere, the Crusaders/Loggers game was rained out. The Crusaders have now played one game in the last four days.

The Indians skipped Clements and sent Mendez into the Wednesday game.

Game 2
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 1B A. Young – LF DeWeese – 3B Nunley – RF Medina – 2B Jones – C Baca – P Santos
IND: LF J. Baker – CF J. Wilson – 1B S. Guerra – RF Gilmor – C Padilla – 2B Mathews – SS Dawson – 3B Tolwith – P A. Mendez

Both teams had 1-out doubles in the first inning, but only the Indians used a groundout by Nick Gilmor to score a run. In all fairness, Santos had started his day with drilling Josh Baker, which was not helping his cause much. It was an odd game for Santos, who allowed sufficiently hard contact to be scared rather frequently, including all three batters in the bottom 2nd, Mathews, Ryan Dawson, and Tolwith, but the Indians always seemed to find an out, and Santiago Guerra’s first-inning double remained their only hit through five innings. The Coons had two hits by then, and zero runs, having stranded pairs of runners twice via the strikeout; Nunley in the first, and DeWeese in the third. The Arrowheads didn’t get another hit until the sixth, but then got back-to-back 1-out singles from Baker and Wilson and scored another run on Guerra’s fly out (like one run wasn’t enough…).

Padilla, Mathews, and Dawson would open the bottom 7th with singles off Santos, all of them more or less soft and barely getting past the infield dirt, of ****ing course, and while Apasyu Britton hit into a double play, that still scored another run. Up 3-0, the Indians forewent hitting for “Ant” Mendez, who flew out to DeWeese. What could possibly happen with six outs left? Danny Ochoa opened the inning, batting for Santos, and singled to right center before quickly getting forced out by Carmona. Cookie went on to steal second base, then scored on McKnight’s double to left. Suddenly, the tying run was up! Adam Young cranked an 0-1 pitch into right, a single, and suddenly the go-ahead run appeared in R.J. DeWeese, and still no movement to collect Mendez from the home team. DeWeese hit a looper up the rightfield line for an RBI single, 3-2, before Nunley bounced back to Mendez, who got only DeWeese at second base, with runners on the corners for Sandy Sambrano and two outs. Still no relief in sight, and Sambrano rolled a ball right into Mendez’ glove to end the inning. The hardest harvest was instantly given back to the Indians by Kevin Beaver, who allowed a double and hit a guy, and Seung-mo Chun, who was quite simply no help and allowed another two hard-banged hits, and the Raccoons lost another reason for why there was a huge market for antidepressants. 5-2 Indians. McKnight 2-4, 2 2B, RBI; Young 3-4; Ochoa (PH) 1-2;

The only reason we’re currently not last in the North is that we haven’t lost a sufficient number of games due to three off days and the dreaded and famous New York monsoon season. And I thought Portland was bad!

Game 3
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 1B A. Young – LF DeWeese – 2B Sambrano – 3B Nunley – RF Richards – C Baca – P Abe
IND: LF J. Baker – CF J. Wilson – 1B S. Guerra – RF Gilmor – C Padilla – SS Matias – 2B Mathews – 3B Tolwith – P Clements

Abe, who had struck out 15 in his second and most recent ABL start, was not quite up to speed this time. While Jason Clements had three strikeouts in 16 innings pitched this season and effortlessly axed down two of the Raccoons’ first three batters of the game, Abe issued three hits and three walks in the bottom 1st and was blown up for five runs, and the jury was still out on whether the bases-loaded walk to Raul Matias or the 2-out, bases-clearing triple by Aaron Tolwith was the most gut-wrenching event of the inning. Abe would only last 3.2 innings before being yanked with a runner on second base. Sugano was brought on to face Josh Baker, whom he struck out. Nunley walked to start the top 5th, was doubled up by Richards, and then Alonso Baca singled, which at this point was a big annoyance, since the Raccoons would have liked to keep Sugano around for a few more batters. As it was, Ochoa grabbed a stick, and also singled, sending Baca to third. Cookie then singled, which scored an actual, living run for the Horrorcoons, and McKnight found their fourth consecutive 2-out single in the inning, plating another run and getting the score to 5-2 before Young struck out.

The Arrowheads were close to having their way with Chris Munroe then, who allowed a leadoff double to Wilson in the bottom 5th and walked Gilmor with one out after Carmona had almost shed a few limbs on a flying grab on Guerra’s drive to left center. Munroe fell 3-0 behind Padilla before the catcher grounded to short and into an inning-ending double play on the fourth pitch. Everybody had to endure a 1-hour rain delay after the sixth inning, which was not going to do much but delay the inevitable. Although: the top of the eighth saw Cookie reach on an error by Baker, who dropped his fly, and then reach third base on McKnight’s single. Technically, the Raccoons now had the tying run at home plate, nobody out, and the middle of the order was due to bat. Adam Young’s RBI groundout would be their utmost effort, however, and they ended up swept once again… They made it tense though. Nunley drew a leadoff walk from Joel Davis in the top 9th, bringing up Richards as the tying run, only for him to strike out. Medina hit for Baca and singled before Margolis hit for John Korb and walloped a pitch to center that ended up with the Gold Glover Wilson. Tying runs on the corners with two out, and Cookie singled to left! One run scored, 5-4, and runners on first and second for McKnight. His single to right loaded the bases, but Medina hadn’t gotten a quick jump on the wet infield, and had to hold at third. Bases loaded for an 0-for-4 Adam Young, who fell to two strikes before shoveling a ball into play, a high pop to short that buried the team for good. 5-4 Indians. Carmona 3-5, 2 RBI; McKnight 3-5, RBI; Medina (PH) 1-1; Ochoa (PH) 1-1; Munroe 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 0 K; Korb 2.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K;

Raccoons (5-9) vs. Knights (8-7) – April 22-24, 2016

Late April, and the home crowds were already getting thin. Right now the Raccoons most closely resembled a documentary TV play on Mao’s “Great Leap Forward”. They scored even LESS runs than in 2015 – only the most evil and most ugly bickering and snickering of the baseball gods probably knew how and why. We didn’t have much time for analysis after coming home late on Wednesday night, with the Knights already waiting for us the next evening. They ranked first in runs scored and ninth in runs allowed. Their bullpen was especially flammable with a 5.63 ERA, but whether the Raccoons would ever get to see it was an entirely different thing. We had beaten the Knights for the last three years, including a 5-4 campaign in ’15.

Projected matchups:
Jonathan Toner (0-3, 4.42 ERA) vs. Dave Hogan (1-2, 4.95 ERA)
A.J. Bartels (1-1, 7.20 ERA) vs. Stephen Quirion (1-1, 1.06 ERA)
Nick Brown (1-2, 3.09 ERA) vs. Felipe Ramirez (2-1, 3.60 ERA)

Like I said, no lefties to be found in that rotation. We still haven’t faced one in ’16.

The Knights had picked up veteran LF/RF Lionnel Perri (.143, 0 HR, 0 RBI), age 39, from the Stars to the Knights for 3B/2B/LF Antonio Fraijo (.400, 0 HR, 3 RBI) and #71 prospect 3B Adrian Alvarez earlier this week.

Game 1
ATL: CF M. Reyes – SS Hibbard – 1B Rockwell – RF Raupp – 2B Downing – LF Perri – 3B W. White – C Luna – P Hogan
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – 3B Jones – RF Richards – 2B Bergquist – C Margolis – P Toner

Winless Jonny was a far cry from 2015 so far, although this was mostly in results and not in the raw numbers like walks and strikeouts, and early on he already came close to getting bitten by circumstances again, as Howard Jones, playing at the hot corner to give the spectacularly slumping Matt Nunley some time to think about his actions, missed Devin Hibbard’s playable grounder in the first inning, and made an error on Josh Downing’s roller in the second inning to create a mess for Jonny both times. The Knights didn’t score, and then it was the Coons’ chance to break out in the bottom 2nd after 1-out singles by Jones and Richards and Hogan walking Bergquist to fill the bags for Margolis, who still had a stake in the team home run lead despite batting .148. To be precise, he only had one hit that was not a homer and that didn’t change with his grounder to Hogan, who killed off Howard Jones at home plate. Jonny struck out to end the inning. With that, the game transformed into a quick procession of batters coming out of the dugout with a grim look and retreating to it with a sad face, at least until Hibbard’s leadoff double over DeWeese in the sixth inning. At least Jonny had Gil Rockwell under control, who had four dingers so far, but usually struck out in this game, and the Knights made three outs in succession to starve Hibbard at third base, the game remaining scoreless.

Bottom 6th, and movement: Adam Young led off with a double to left! The Knights tried to be sneaky and walked DeWeese intentionally to get into the swamp of Howard Jones, who was batting .200, and the swath of batters that followed him that batted (way) less. However, Hogan unintentionally lost Jones in a full count, and now the bases were loaded with nobody out. SCORE. SOME. ****ING. RUNS. That was not me – that was a sign out in the bleachers in rightfield. But Richards struck out in another full count before Bergquist grounded hard to the second base bag. Hibbard came over, collected the ball and stepped on second base to force Howard, who never slid and was more like flying in, one leg high with spikes extended, to break up the double play – and it worked. Hibbard ducked out of the way, Bergquist legged out his potential game-killer, and Young scored with the first run of the game. Then Margolis struck out. Jonny Toner was thoroughly sick of the misery surrounding him; he hit a ****ing leadoff jack in the bottom 7th, extending his lead to 2-0. Hogan was melting away now; he walked McKnight with one out, then allowed an RBI triple to Young. The Coons were up 3-0, and the Knights struggled to get anything going against Toner, who entered the ninth inning on 101 pitches. Gil Rockwell walked in the inning, but the Knights couldn’t get another hit and went down. 3-0 Raccoons. Young 3-4, 3B, 2B, RBI; Nunley (PH) 1-1, 2B; Toner 9.0 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 7 K, W (1-3) and 1-4, HR, RBI;

Eighth career shutout for Jonny Toner, who is of course remembered for having five in his first full season in 2014. Meanwhile the Raccoons keep dangling just one run ahead of 12th place in offense…

Game 2
ATL: CF M. Reyes – SS Hibbard – 1B Rockwell – RF Raupp – 2B Downing – LF Perri – 3B W. White – C Luna – P Quirion
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – 3B Nunley – 2B Sambrano – RF Ochoa – C Baca – P Bartels

It was close to freezing in Portland on this Saturday evening, and Cookie Carmona took care to make the crowd just that little bit warmer with a leadoff triple in the bottom 1st, soon scoring on McKnight’s sac fly for the first run of the game. That was before Bartels imploded, however. Lionnel Perri opened the second inning with a single. Wade White made an out to left, but Perri – 39 years old – stole second base. Ruben Luna doubled him in to tie the game, and then Bartels walked the pitcher, allowed an RBI single to Reyes that moved Quirion to third base, then balked him in. Hibbard plated Bartels, and the Raccoons were down 4-1, which was never a good spot to be in for a team wholly inept at the plate.

And on the mound. Bartels got spanked around for three and a third, including another balk, and nine hits total before Gil Rockwell hit a gargantuan 2-run homer to splatter tiny bits of Bartels all over the park. The Knights were up 7-1, and Bartels was banished to the showers where Todd von Lindenthal watched carefully that he didn’t use more soap than he was worth himself. While quite lowly valued himself, Chris Munroe would pitch another ten outs in long relief – while the offensive department literally did nothing – and only departed after a 2-out single by Perri in the seventh. With two left-handers coming up, Sugano was called on, allowed a single to White and a galactic 3-run bomb to Luna, who was even now just batting .175 … A substantial portion of the already sparse crowd was heading for the exits when Ochoa hit a 2-out, 2-run single in the bottom of the inning. Baca somehow stumbled onto base, Richards hit for Sugano and singled, and then Cookie unleashed a 2-run double before being thrown out at third base to end the inning. Somehow, something had sparked. Bottom 8th, Young and DeWeese hit singles before Nunley cracked a 3-run homer to right. Suddenly the Raccoons were back in a 10-8 game! Jim Cushing retired Sambrano and Ochoa to end the inning, but when Howard Jones hit for Baca and walked against lefty Mike Tharp to start the bottom 9th, the tying run came up with Danny Margolis pinch-hitting for John Korb. He flew out to center, and the Raccoons had just reached their high water mark. Cookie got Jones forced with a grounder to Josh Downing, and McKnight struck out to end the game. 10-8 Knights. Carmona 2-5, 3B, 2B, 2 RBI; DeWeese 2-4; Nunley 2-4, HR, 3 RBI; Ochoa 2-4, 2 RBI; Richards (PH) 1-1; Munroe 3.1 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 3 K;

This team…

Sunday will see Nick Brown with the first realistic chance to reach 3,000 strikeouts. Well, IF he can match the CL record for strikeouts in a single game with 16. Also, he can catch HOF Carlos Asquabal for eighth all-time if he whiffs 11.

Game 3
ATL: CF M. Reyes – SS Hibbard – 1B Rockwell – RF Raupp – LF Perri – 2B Downing – C Luna – 3B W. White – P F. Ramirez
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF Sambrano – RF Richards – 2B Jones – C Margolis – P Brown

The Critters struck first, sorta. Actually Sandy reached with a leadoff walk in the bottom 2nd, stole second base on a bounced throw by Luna, and then came home when Downing capitally threw away Richards’ grounder. Ron Richards went to second base on the 2-base error, but Jones and Margolis both failed in their bids to not look shabby at the plate. Nick Brown came up with two outs and beat Gil Rockwell with a hard bouncer for a single to right, giving himself a 2-0 lead. On the mound he was perfect the first time through the order, though with only one strikeout (Downing). Marty Reyes seemed to take him deep to start the top of the fourth, but somehow the ball not only didn’t go out of left center, but Cookie also made a catch at the fence. Reyes had hit it too high and just not far enough. The Knights remained off base and the inning ended with a K to Rockwell. The first Knight on base would actually be Downing in the fifth, who took an 0-2 pitch in the hand, but survived AND stayed in the game. Just when people started double-checking the scoreboard, it would actually be Felipe Ramirez, Brown’s opposing pitcher, who got the Knights into the H column with a line drive single to center with one out in the sixth inning. That still didn’t lead to something substantial, but all bids were off the table for Brownie through six unless with 75 pitches he’d find room for seven more strikeouts to match Asquabal.

Some insurance runs would be nice. Bottom 6th, Ramirez walked Richards with two outs and was yanked. His replacement, Adam Harper, right-handed, walked Howard Jones on four pitches, but all that did was bring up fearsome .121 batter Danny Margolis, who for a different team would be cleaning toilets, but STILL had a stake in the team home run lead. I hated batting for my catcher in the sixth, however, so he was allowed to **** up, grounding out to short successfully. Brownie maintained a shutout with a brittle 2-0 lead through seven, and flew out to center to start the bottom half of the inning. Cookie then ran a 3-0 count against Harper before ripping, and – lo and behold – whacked the ball outta rightfield! Cookie’s first homer since 2014 put the Raccoons up 3-0. McKnight belched another one, 4-0!

The joy proved short-lived. Brown walked Perri to start the eighth, which got the bullpen’s attention. Then Downing doubled, scoring Perri, 4-1. There were two left-handers up, and neither missed a pitch. Luna grounded out, but White was hit. The Knights sent Javier Gusmán to pinch-hit, another left-hander, and Brown faced him as well. Gusmán grounded to second, but Jones only got White at second base as a run scored. Mathis replaced Brownie now, got Reyes to ground out to Nunley, and at least they were out of the inning. And maybe they could rebound! Even if it was just Devin Hibbard’s throwing error that put Sandy on second base to start the bottom 8th. Bergquist hit for Richards against southpaw Quinn McCarthy, flew out to right, but Sandy moved to third base. Jones walked, Margolis lined out to short, and then I didn’t know better than to send DeWeese to pinch-hit, still against McCarthy. DeWeese met the first pitch, mashed it to center, and had an RBI single! Cookie walked to load the bags and still McCarthy was in to face McKnight, who bounced to Downing, close play at first, but out. Ron Thrasher issued a walk in the ninth, but made it out of there. 5-2 Brownies! Carmona 2-4, BB, HR, RBI; Richards 1-2, BB; DeWeese (PH) 1-1, RBI; Brown 7.2 IP, 2 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 1 BB, 5 K, W (2-2) and 1-3, RBI;

In other news

April 18 – Gold Sox and Warriors enter the 10th inning tied at five in Sioux Falls, but the Warriors get blasted out of the water by eight runs in the top of the 10th and lose 13-5.
April 19 – TOP LF/RF Bill Adams (.400, 2 HR, 8 RBI), who has an active 25-game hitting streak going, will miss four weeks with a strained groin muscle.
April 19 – The hitting streak of L.A.’s Jimmy Roberts (.431, 4 HR, 16 RBI) ends with a hitless appearance in the Pacifics’ 5-3 win over the Scorpions. Roberts had been hitting in 22 consecutive games.
April 20 – CIN SP Bruce Morrison (2-1, 5.12 ERA) is sharp against the Capitals with a 6-hit shutout, while the Washington pitchers weren’t quite, as the Capitals are blown out 17-0, including a completely crippling 11-run fourth inning.
April 20 – The Bayhawks rout the Falcons, 13-1, with the help of a 10-run seventh inning.
April 22 – The Scorpions will be without 2B Ricky Luna (.292, 1 HR, 3 RBI) for six weeks. The 26-year old has torn a meniscus.
April 22 – The Blue Sox pump out 20 hits in a 9-4 defeat of the Stars. Chris Macias (.284, 3 HR, 14 RBI) has four hits and drives in five.

Complaints and stuff

The Agitator spit some poison this week, calling the Raccoons too dumb to even play “hide and seek” – the offense had the hiding part down, but they weren’t seeking anything!

Casually checking in on Jeff Magnotta… who has more walks than strikeouts in AAA. (sigh!)

Fun fact: who leads all active pitchers with 3,769.1 innings pitched? Randy Farley!

Ralph Ford is fourth in that list behind Pancho Trevino and permanently inactive Chris York. Nick Brown would be seventh with 2,903.1 innings (with 2,989 K) on that left wing, ranking after Paul Miller and Juichi Fujita.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (7-10) vs. Thunder (7-12) – April 25-27, 2016

Lots of offensive futility in this series! The Raccoons were t-10th in runs scored with 59 mostly lonely counters, while the Thunder were even worse, ranking bottom in the Continental League with 56 runs from 19 games, which was less than three runs per game. They were also dead last in starters’ ERA. The only usable thing seemed to be their second-place bullpen. The season series has ended 5-4 in the Coons’ favor for three straight years.

Projected matchups:
Hector Santos (1-1, 2.14 ERA) vs. Jorge Gine (0-2, 3.47 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (1-1, 3.86 ERA) vs. Bob King (0-3, 4.94 ERA)
Jonathan Toner (1-3, 2.96 ERA) vs. Ted McKenzie (1-2, 6.26 ERA)

We missed our first left-hander of the season by a day, as Ed Michaels pitched on Sunday. He’s also among their least horrendous hurlers with a 3.80 ERA and a 2-1 record.

Game 1
OCT: CF Farias – 2B A. Rodriguez – LF S. Young – 1B B. Thomas – 3B J. Soto – RF L. Taylor – SS Janes – C D. Anderson – P Gine
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B A. Young – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 2B Jones – C Baca – P Santos

Emilio Farias led off with a single on this cold, dark, and windy Monday evening, stole second, made it to third on Alonso Baca’s errant throw, and scored on a groundout to put the Thunder up 1-0 in the first inning. The Raccoons had two on with two outs in the bottom 2nd, which unfortunately brought up Santos, who struck out, but the third saw a leadoff walk drawn by Cookie. He stole second base against ex-Coon Daryl Anderson, moved up on McKnight’s fly to center, and came home on Nunley’s grounder to short to tie the game. Santos was in trouble instantly in the top of the fourth as Sean Young singled to start the inning, and he stole second base. Bill Thomas, coming in batting .192 with one RBI, singled to right, but it wasn’t enough to double his output and the Thunder had them on the corners with nobody out and three left-handers next. Santos struck out Jesus Soto, struck out Logan Taylor (another bad memory there…), and then got a pop by Erik Janes to left to end the inning. Janes was batting under .170, yet somehow led the team with 11 RBI.

After six failed attempts to start the season, Baca finally threw out a runner in the sixth inning, nailing Sean Young who tried to go 2-for-2 after another leadoff single off Santos. Howard Jones stole second base with two outs in the bottom 6th after singling, but the Thunder elected the safe choice, walked Baca intentionally and got the third out from Santos again. Santos crossed 100 pitches in completing the seventh, but at least the Coons got Cookie and McKnight on with singles to start the bottom of the inning. However, the 3-4-5 batters failed out of the demanding scoring chance completely and left the runners on first and second. The Thunder had the same opportunity at the start of the eighth inning, whacking two singles off Chris Mathis. Sugano replaced him, the Thunder sent right-handed pinch-hitter Julio Hernandez, and Sugano drilled him. Bases loaded, no outs, Bill Thomas stuck to his lone RBI by hitting into a 6-4-3 double play, that nevertheless scored the go-ahead run. To the Thunder’s credit, they tried real hard to get the Raccoons a comeback opportunity. Jones got a confused walk from Steve Rob in the bottom 8th, but Baca and Ochoa sneezed at the runner. In the bottom 9th, Jason Clark, replacing Thomas at first base, made a clumsy error on Cookie’s grounder, putting a rather dangerous leadoff man on base as the tying run. Cookie stole second base against a battery of ex-Coons in Anderson and Micah Steele, and moved to third when McKnight grounded out to Armando Rodriguez. Nunley grounded back to the pitcher, which had Cookie hold at third. Adam Young flew to center, not deep, not dangerous, not useful in any way. 2-1 Thunder. Nunley 2-5, RBI; Jones 2-3, BB; Santos 7.0 IP, 7 H, 1 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 7 K;

That night at 1:25am, the police visited me. Neighbors had complained about the howling and had assumed I was skinning cats alive in my basement. To be fair, that the cops turned over every bit and box in my house for three hours was justified. After all there were blood stains around the house. It was mine though, after I had stepped into a broken bottle.

Oh, the pain… the pain… the pain is so real…

Can we PLEASE get contracted, just so that the pain will end?

Game 2
OCT: CF Farias – 2B A. Rodriguez – 1B B. Thomas – 3B J. Soto – RF L. Taylor – SS Janes – LF V. Diaz – C D. Anderson – P B. King
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B A. Young – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 2B Jones – C Baca – P Abe

Some 15.000 people that should have known better had bought tickets to see a flock of millionaires trying to pin the tail on the donkey, except that they were wielding bats and there was no donkey. Probably, neither would there be runs.

Well, in some way, the Coons got on the board first … into the E column as Howard Jones immediately misfielded Emilio Farias’ grounder. Rodriguez hit into a double play, but the tone was probably set for another night of nothing to be excited about. The bottom 2nd then DID see the Coons scored a run, though … well … Logan Taylor (ex-Coon alarm) capitally failed on a modestly difficult fly ball by Howard Jones, which would have ended the inning, and instead managed to deflect it into the corner for a 2-out triple. Baca ran a 2-2 count when Bob King sailed a pitch over the head of Daryl Anderson, and Jones scampered home with the run. Not that the lead held for any amount of time! Anderson doubled in the top of the third, Abe failed to get King when he swung and singled, and then Farias hit an RBI double. With runners on second and third, Rodriguez struck out and Thomas popped out to end the inning. Again 1-1. Again suckage.

At least some of the Coons tried. Cookie and McKnight reached in the bottom 3rd, but Nunley hit into an inning-ending double play. Bottom 4th, Young fell into a pitch to reach first base, and DeWeese didn’t finish his sandwich in time and had to continue munching in the batter’s box, but that prevented him from swinging at any of the four balls that King lobbed over. Two on, no outs, Ron Richards hit into a much-expected double play, and Jones flew out to Taylor in right this time. Top 5th, rain started to fall and the Thunder scored a run because Abe failed to retire anybody with two strikes. For a short time there was hope that this one might be over early, but the rain stopped in the bottom 5th just after Abe got Baca killed at second with a horrendous bunt. Abe was then stranded on second base after Cookie grounded out and McKnight flailed himself out. Bottom 6th. Nunley hit a leadoff double to center. Young grounded out, moving him to third. DeWeese… struck out. Richards, batting .188, dimpled a ball back to the pitcher – and King’s throw to first was ****, Thomas had to dash after the ball, and Nunley came home with the tying run. For crying out … -

Bottom 7th, Baca led off with a single to right. Sandy Sambrano hit for Abe and struck out. Cookie was at 3-1, then flew out to Taylor. McKnight hit a ball into the gap in right center, it was a double, but Baca was too slow to score. Nunley also hit a ball in that direction on 2-2, which was also the score, but this time Farias hustled over to catch it and strand a pair of runners in scoring position. The Thunder also reached third base in the eighth inning against Seung-mo Chun, with Sugano taking over to face Jesus Soto, but he got to see Julio Hernandez again. This time, Hernandez flew out to center, ending the inning. Bottom 8th, Steve Rob was in for King, and immediately allowed a hard single to Young, and then walked DeWeese. Juan Medina hit for the awful Ron Richards, struck out, Jones flew out to right, and Baca flew out to center.

In fact, these two capitally ****ed up teams managed to fail to play the game to conclusion. Rain resumed during the eighth inning. With Thrasher “pitching” in the ninth, the Thunder had runners on a single and a walk, and then the rain became a real douser. Play never resumed, and the teams had to complete the game on Wednesday before the main course (another nine horrid innings, at least).

Game 2 (resumption with two outs in top 9th)
OCT: 3B Farias – CF S. Young – 1B B. Thomas – 2B J. Hernandez – RF L. Taylor – SS Janes – LF V. Diaz [2ND]– C D. Anderson [1ST] – PH J. Clark
POR: CF Carmona – P Mathis – 3B Nunley – 1B A. Young – LF DeWeese – RF Medina – 2B Jones – C Baca – SS Sambrano

Mathis replaced Thrasher as the game resumed since Thrasher had already gone to 1-2 against Clark when the game entered the delay on Tuesday, he was a right-hander, and we wanted Thrasher to be available for the third game potentially (hey, ya gotta pretend). Mathis struck out Clark without much fuss to defuse the situation, and the bottom 9th saw Robert Parsons issue a leadoff walk to Sambrano, who reached third on Cookie’s single. Ochoa sent the teams back to their locker rooms after hardly seven minutes of action with a blooper on a 3-1 pitch that happened to drop in front of Logan Taylor. 3-2 Blighters. Carmona 2-5; McKnight 2-4, 2B; Ochoa (PH) 1-1, RBI; Nunley 2-4, 2B; Baca 2-4, 3B; Abe 7.0 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 0 BB, 4 K;

The W was credited to Thrasher, who was also credited for the putout of Jason Clark.

Game 3
OCT: CF Farias – 2B A. Rodriguez – LF S. Young – 1B B. Thomas – 3B J. Soto – RF L. Taylor – SS Janes – C J. Clark – P McKenzie
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B A. Young – LF Ochoa – 2B Sambrano – RF Medina – C Margolis – P Toner

(deep sigh) … well, Cookie hit a leadoff single in the bottom 1st and was ignored, and in the second Ochoa walked and Sambrano singled with nobody out. Medina hit one to short, just barely stayed out of the double play, but Margolis hit right into it, with force and pleasure. By then the Thunder were up 1-0, taking the lead without the benefit of a hit as Jonny walked Bill Thomas and Jesus Soto to start the second inning, Margolis was guilty of a passed ball, and the Thunder found a productive groundout somewhere. Thomas would hit a homer in the fourth to give his team a 2-0 lead, and this was also the single most impressive thing any hitter had displayed in the series.

Bottom 4th, Nunley and Young got on base with a single and a walk, respectively, while Young would have been out if Thomas had held on to his foul pop two pitches earlier. No outs for Ochoa, now batting .412, and he found the hole between Janes and Rodriguez for a bases-loading single. Sandy hit one right to Rodriguez, but the Thunder only got the out at second as a run scored. McKenzie would throw a wild pitch to tie the game… That was about what it took for the Coons to score: the other team ****ing up. The magnificent Raccoons then took the lead in the bottom 5th after Cookie’s leadoff double and Nunley’s roller past Bill Thomas for an RBI single, which also gave the team its first double-digit RBI slugger before it slammed face-first into May! Whoah, watch out, other teams! The Coons, they are a-comin’!

The bottom 7th was led off by Danny Margolis with his fifth hit of the season, and fourth extra-base hit, a double to right center that shot his average to a dizzying .135; Toner was under 100 pitches, but was hit for with DeWeese available on the bench and the Thunder just having gone to right-hander Robert Parsons. He hit a ball hard to right, but also right to Vinny Diaz for the first out. Parsons loaded them up by walking Cookie (intentionally) and Nunley (not so much), bringing up Adam Young, who grounded to the right side, but Rodriguez missed it by inches, and two runs scored! The Thunder immediately chopped one run off the 5-2 lead in the eighth, getting Sugano and Chun on a pair of doubles by Diaz and Sean Young, but that run was made up in the bottom 8th when McKnight hit an angry RBI double after Parsons had drilled Cookie Carmona. Thrasher walked one and struck out three in securing the win and the series. 6-3 Critters. Carmona 2-3, BB, 2B; Nunley 2-4, BB, RBI; Ochoa 2-3, BB; Baca (PH) 1-1; Toner 7.0 IP, 3 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 7 K, W (2-3);

Six runs in a game! Huzzah! Progress!

Too bad we now have an off day and they will have forgotten how to swing at all by Friday…

Raccoons (9-11) @ Titans (9-13) – April 29-May 1, 2016

The Titans had swept us to start the season, but by now the numbers showed that they weren’t any good at all and still a bit of a 100-losses team. They were ninth in runs scored, and 11th in runs allowed. Their rotation was now last in the CL after we had spared the Thunder too much embarrassment during the week. Their pen was also in the bottom three. A good team would beat them senseless…

Game 1
Nick Brown (2-2, 2.90 ERA) vs. Jonathan Ryan (0-2, 6.95 ERA)
Hector Santos (1-1, 1.61 ERA) vs. Kevin Poisson (1-3, 6.00 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (1-1, 3.51 ERA) vs. Ian Rutter (3-0, 1.80 ERA)

Poisson will finally be the first southpaw for the Coons to poke at, on April 30!

Bartels was shunted back to the end of the line with the conveniently placed off day on Thursday.

Game 1
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 2B Jones – C Baca – P Brown
BOS: RF Blake – 3B T. Thomas – 1B S. Butler – C T. Robinson – 2B J. Gutierrez – LF X. Williams – SS Stephenson – CF Thurman – P Ryan

While the Coons went down in order against the shoddy Ryan for the first three innings, Brownie wasn’t fooling anybody, had only one K the first time through the Titans’ lineup, and fell behind 1-0 in the bottom 3rd after a leadoff single by Zachary Thurman and then an RBI single by Tom Thomas. Top 4th, Cookie walked in a full count to finally show some brown on the bases, and McKnight reached with a blooper to center. Nunley struck out, and Young and DeWeese both grounded out to not do a ****ing thing in support of their pitcher. It only got worse for Brown, who walked Tim Robinson to start the bottom 4th, then hit Jose Gutierrez. Joe Stephenson would reach on an infield single to fill the bags, and Zachary Thurman even popped out to Young, but Brown couldn’t whiff anybody or anything, not even Ryan, who singled softly to center to score two runs with two outs.

The tying run would appear at the plate after both Cookie and Nunley had singles in the top 6th and stood on the corners with one out for Young. Ryan ran a full count on Young before the first baseman flailed out pathetically, while DeWeese got his K in much quicker fashion. Brown was hit for to start the top of the eighth. Medina doubled, and when Cookie tripled, the Coons were not only on the board, but had the tying run at the plate once more. McKnight’s and Nunley’s flies to deep center were both intercepted by Thurman, and Young struck out once again, leaving the Raccoons a run short of tying the Titans in the eighth. One more attempt in the ninth! While Ron Sakellaris (10.1 innings, no runs) struck out DeWeese (sob) and caught a scorched liner off Ochoa’s bat, Sandy hit a pinch-hit double to become the tying run. Baca batted with two outs, Robinson’s passed ball moved Sandy to third base, and then Baca flew out to Xavier Williams. 3-2 Titans. Carmona 2-3, BB, 3B, RBI; Sambrano (PH) 1-1, 2B; Medina (PH) 1-1, 2B;

****ed up game.

Only two strikeouts for the longest-tenured Critter, who has seen **** go down at points in his career, but I bet he can’t sleep at night either…

Game 2
POR: CF Carmona – RF Medina – SS McKnight – LF DeWeese – 1B Sambrano – 2B Bergquist – 3B Nunley – C Margolis – P Santos
BOS: SS M. Rivera – 2B J. Gutierrez – 1B S. Butler – C T. Robinson – RF X. Williams – 3B T. Thomas – CF Blake – LF Arnold – P Poisson

Danny Margolis was a bit of the odd, red-headed stepchild on the roster, but hit a 2-out RBI single to give Santos the lead in this Saturday game, in the top of the second inning. The Raccoons would have two on with nobody out in the fourth, but Bergquist, Nunley, and Margolis would then fail in order. Steve Butler hurt himself in the fourth on a double, one of two hits the Titans had against Santos in four innings against seven strikeouts, and was replaced by Daron Griffin. In the top of the fifth, Cookie was caught stealing for the second time in the game, and this one came just before Medina hit a 2-out double, McKnight walked, and DeWeese struck out. Next inning, next RISP opportunity. Sandy led off with a single, and then Bergquist also singled to left, where the ball bounced twice, then hit Bob Arnold in the leg, and by the time Arnold had caught up with the ball, the Coons had runners in scoring position with nobody out. The Titans played this well, walked Nunley intentionally, then got Chae-ku Lee to pop up Margolis, strike out Santos, and Cookie grounded out to Jose Gutierrez. The bottom 6th saw a leadoff single by Mike Rivera, who had seven stolen bases so far, but was thrown out by Margolis here, just before Gutierrez doubled. Gutierrez ended up stranded at third base, and the Coons maintained their 1-0 lead that should have been something like 6-0 by now. The completely annoying Raccoons then lost Cookie Carmona to injury as he tried to defuse a rocket by Robinson, and had two up again with one out in the eighth for Margolis. He hit a rocket to center, too, that one was defused, too, and Ochoa hit for Santos as we were desperate for some offense, yet Ochoa grounded to Gutierrez. Mathis managed to dance around a pinch-hit double by Omarion Thompson in the bottom of the eighth, and the Raccoons would have runners on the corners with no outs in the top of the ninth after a leadoff single by Adam Young, a Jayden Reed wild pitch, and another single by Medina.

SCORE. SOME. ****ING. RUNS!!!

McKnight hit an RBI single, 2-0, before Reed misfielded DeWeese’s grounder into an infield single, and threw a wild pitch, 3-0. Sandy hit a sac fly, 4-0, prompting a pitching change to lefty Matt Branch, who did not allow the Coons to gain another inch. Kevin Beaver ended the Titans with a scoreless ninth. 4-0 Blighters. Carmona 2-4; Young 1-1; Medina 2-5, 2B; Sambrano 2-4, RBI; Bergquist 2-4, BB; Santos 7.0 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 8 K, W (2-1);

The Titans would later find out that Butler would miss six weeks with a sprained ankle. He had batted .295 with 2 HR and 13 RBI.

Game 3
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 2B Jones – C Baca – P Abe
BOS: SS M. Rivera – 2B J. Gutierrez – 1B Griffin – C T. Robinson – RF X. Williams – 3B T. Thomas – CF Blake – LF O. Thompson – P Rutter

The Coons put two on in the first that were left on once DeWeese struck out. Abe would walk Rivera to start the bottom 1st and allowed two hard singles, which was enough to score the quick and annoying Rivera, and the Coons were adrift, down 1-0.

Actually, no. They led by the third inning. Baca doubled in Jones in the second, and Nunley opened the third with another double off Rutter, and scored on Adam Young’s single to center. DeWeese and Richards both rolled shy grounder through between Gutierrez and Griffin, which loaded the bases with still nobody out in the third. Rutter got nerves and walked Howard Jones on four pitches, pushing in another run, before Baca hit a sac fly. The inning expired after Abe even failed to bunt and got the lead run thrown out at third base, while Sambrano grounded out to second, but Abe now had a 4-1 lead. DeWeese would tack on a run with a 2-out RBI single in the fourth, but the Raccoons had the bags full with one out in the sixth and Branch would strike out both DeWeese and Richards to end the frame. For the longest time, Abe would not give the Titans anything in a 5-1 game, before they suddenly assaulted him in the eighth. Thurman led off with a single, and with one out Gutierrez doubled, putting runners on second and third. Sugano came out to face Daron Griffin, but allowed an infield single that kept the runners pinned, so the bases were loaded and Tim Robinson (5 HR, 14 RBI) was the tying run. Mathis came out to see him, fell behind, fell behind further, was behind 3-1, and the Robinson belched a grand slam to left, tying the score of the ****ing game at ****ing five.

The game went to extra innings, with Jayden Reed allowing nothing against Ochoa, Sambrano, and McKnight in the top of the 10th. Thrasher was in for the bottom of the 10th, which turned into something absurd. Rivera led off and grounded to first, where Sambrano shackled the ball and left Rivera safe on the error. Thrasher immediately went on to walk Gutierrez before whiffin’ Griffin. Then Robinson dueled out a walk that loaded the bases. Four batters into the inning, Thrasher sat on 27 pitches, and used another eight to strike out Xavier Williams for the second out. With right-hander Tom Thomas, batting .164, next, Thrasher was probably still the best solution. Right-handed we only had Korb and Munroe left, and I preferred to stick to our assumed closer. Thrasher’s 36th pitch, the first to Thomas, was way wild, twisted Baca like a good old wooden spinning top, and and the Titans danced off into taking another game from completely moronic Raccoons. 6-5 Titans. Nunley 2-4, BB, 2 2B; Young 1-2, 2 BB, RBI; DeWeese 2-5, RBI;

In other news

April 26 – After going to the 10th inning tied 3-3, the Buffaloes and Stars each score three more runs in the 10th inning. The Stars eventually walk off in the 12th, 7-6, on Hugo Mendoza (.474, 6 HR, 26 RBI) getting a single through the right side with the bases loaded.
April 26 – The Blue Sox dish out 20 hits yet again, this time in a 9-3 win over the Scorpions.
April 27 – Radial nerve compression puts NAS SP J.J. Wirth (1-3, 7.40 ERA) out for the season.
April 27 – There’s two 1-0 games in the Continental League on the same day, as the Canadiens beat the Falcons and the Titans squeeze by the Condors by the lowest possible score.
April 29 – It’s a 3-homer game for VAN 1B Ray Gilbert (.292, 7 HR, 14 RBI), who goes deep three times in the Canadiens’ 14-4 rout of the Loggers. He hits a solo home run off Kurt Doyle in the second, a grand slam off Tony Harrell in the fourth, and another 2-shot off Harrell in the sixth. This is the 30th 3-HR binge in ABL history, the second for the Canadiens (Luis Arroyo, 1994), and the fourth time this has happened to the Loggers, who haven’t had such an output by a player in almost 30 years.
April 30 – DAL OF/1B Hugo “Tiger” Mendoza (.467, 8 HR, 29 RBI), who leads the Federal League in mostly everything, will be greatly hampered with a herniated disc for at least a week.
April 30 – The Warriors have to make do without LF/RF Jose “Dingus” Morales (.392, 3 HR, 22 RBI) for the next two weeks. The 33-year old has a mild shoulder strain.

Complaints and stuff

Jimmy Oatmeal was Hitter of the Month in the CL, batting .352 with 8 HR and 19 RBI. I need to kill myself now.

The Agitator continues to find harsh words. Tuesday, the front page read just “COLLECTIVE FAILURE”. Sunday had Cookie lying in center under the lettering of “EVERYTHING CRUMBLES”, but that was better than Saturday’s “TITANS SUFFOCATE BABOONS AGAIN”.

While Alonso Baca and Howard Jones went the entire month of April without an RBI, and I am greatly annoyed, I can feel the hatred for Adam Young and R.J. DeWeese developing, and the desire to see their ****ing guts rot on an open fire in some run-down, blood-stained, trash-littered alleyway in downtown Guatemala City.

That didn’t take long.

Also, no news on Cookie yet, and the Druid isn’t here right now, but I have found an opened, half-empty 15oz can of Yellow Cow and one of those flat vacuum cleaning robots with a very confused black and white kitten on top sucking up what most have been a hundred pounds of sugar strewn all across the floor in the trainer’s room, which probably means that things will get ugly.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (10-13) @ Canadiens (10-14) – May 2-4, 2016

Last year had been a mild disaster as far as our head-to-head battle with the Elks had been concerned. After holding them down for half a decade, the Raccoons completely flunked out of the contest and lost 13 of 18 games. This is not something that can be repeated, boys! These Elks here had not gotten a good start. They ranked ninth in runs scored, but at least fourth in runs allowed, with a -1 run differential that perhaps hinted at some capability to play better than .417. Bad news for the Coons: they had the rotation with the lowest ERA in the Continental League…

Projected matchups:
A.J. Bartels (1-2, 10.13 ERA) vs. Rod Taylor (2-3, 3.57 ERA)
Jonathan Toner (2-3, 2.88 ERA) vs. Sean Lewis (1-2, 2.88 ERA)
Nick Brown (2-3, 3.08 ERA) vs. Samuel McMullen (4-0, 0.90 ERA)

Southpaw matchup on Wednesday with Brownie and McMullen, who looked just ever so slightly untouchable.

While the Elks were down a starting pitcher in Jesus Cabrera, the Raccoons still didn’t know what ailment had befallen Ricardo Carmona, but I trusted in the actual complexity of the injury as a Housean mystery, and would not allow the thought that the Druid didn’t know what he was doing……

Game 1
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Medina – 2B Jones – C Baca – P Bartels
VAN: RF K. Evans – 2B Tellez – CF Cameron – 1B Gilbert – LF E. Garcia – SS Lawrence – C Little – 3B Irvin – P R. Taylor

Back home in Portland, I flicked off the TV while the first inning was still raging, and went to sit in the fridge for a few hours. The Coons had a Nunley double in the top of the first that sat in the middle of a raging sea of strikeouts, while Bartels basically didn’t retire anybody. Kurt Evans had a leadoff walk, Cesar Tellez and Ray Gilbert had singles, which already put them up 2-0, Enrique Garcia hit an infield single, and Jaylin Lawrence bombed colossally to right for a 3-run homer to put Bartels into a 5-0 hole. I missed Jeremiah Irvin’s home run in the same inning, and how the manager removed Bartels after Rod Taylor’s single to give him a deadly injection.

Chris Munroe would pitch 4.1 innings of scoreless relief after Bartels had departed on the windscreen of a transcontinental bus, after which Kevin Beaver with his own kind of ineptitude almost created more joy for hopeless fans of that disgusting team, loading the bases in the sixth, including drilling Enrique Garcia with two outs and an 0-2 pitch. Lawrence fouled out to save his furry butt. All the while, the Raccoons did zero against Rod Taylor, and reached scoring position exactly once from the second through the sixth inning. DeWeese hit a double in the seventh inning and scored on Howard Jones’ 2-out single to left. Baca singled, too, after which Ron Richards hit for Beaver, but got rung up for Taylor’s ninth K. Suddenly: movement. Sandy led off the eighth with a single to right. McKnight singled to right center, Nunley singled to center, and Young singled to left center. Aside from going counter-clockwise around the field, the Raccoons had just doubled their offensive output with four hits in a row, two runs had scored, it was 6-3 with two on and DeWeese coming up, but flew out softly to right. Medina’s infield single loaded the bases, but Taylor wasn’t actually removed until he had struck out Jones. Orlando Valdez came on with the bases loaded and two outs, with Bergquist hitting for Baca and sending a drive to center, that nevertheless ended up with Don Cameron, and was the Coons’ last hurrah in this ****ed up game. 6-3 Canadiens. Sambrano 3-5; McKnight 2-5; Nunley 2-5, 2B, RBI; Munroe 4.1 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 3 K;

The next morning I was so mad I called Todd von Lindenthal at like six o’clock in Vancouver and instructed him to throw Bartels out of the hotel. RIGHT. NOW. 14 innings, 21 runs, that was not even hard math. He was waived and designated for assignment. Chris Munroe would move to the rotation until I could come up with another plan, with his first start on Sunday in Salem.

Also sent home from Vancouver was Cookie Carmona after the Druid had diagnosed a sore shoulder. We’d not get him back for at least three weeks. 2010 second-rounder Matt Stubbs was flown in to replace him. While not much of a defender, the 24-year old Stubbs is batting right-handed and using that for a .329 average in 18 AAA games so far. He’s also quite speedy, so exactly why he makes it seems like his outfield range is like 15 feet is a mystery. Meanwhile, Juan Gallegos filled the open bullpen spot.

Game 2
POR: SS McKnight – CF Medina – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF Ochoa – RF Richards – 2B Jones – C Baca – P Toner
VAN: RF K. Evans – C J. Martinez – CF Cameron – 1B Gilbert – LF E. Garcia – SS Lawrence – 2B Hilderbrand – 3B Irvin – P Lewis

Toner hit into an inning-ending double play in the top of the 2nd, then pulled a Bartels in the bottom of the inning. After a leadoff walk to Ray Gilbert, a wild pitch at 0-2 as prelude to another walk to Enrique Garcia, and a hard 2-run double into the rightfield corner by Jaylin Lawrence, I had already accepted the result and returned to the fridge. The Elks weren’t going to let Toner off the hook, drew another walk and got another three hits in putting four runs on him. The Raccoons would score two in the top 3rd on four singles, but Gilbert hit a leadoff homer off Toner in the bottom 3rd to regrow the lead to 5-2. Sean Lewis wasn’t really fooling anybody, either, however: and the Raccoons had another three singles to load the bases in the top of the fourth. Now they just needed somebody to come up with a big swing for once, and Nunley was at the plate with one out. He had already hit a single in the previous inning to run a hitting streak to 12 games, but now we needed something actually countable. He flew out to Evans in shallow right on the first pitch before Young bounced back to Lewis for the third out. By contrast, Jesus Martinez led off the bottom 4th with a single, stole second base, and scored on Garcia’s single, 6-2.

Both pitchers were out after five innings. Lewis was guilty of allowing a 3-run homer to Alonso Baca in the top of the fifth, while Toner hit a man and threw a wild pitch in the bottom 5th before somehow escaping on Nunley’s merit, who made a great play on PH Manlio Varone’s grounder to help Toner evade T.J. Hilderbrand on second base. The Critters then made everybody in Coon City suffer through two innings of doing nothing against right-hander Frank Yeager and his Bartelsian ERA, before Alonso Baca hit a leadoff single in the eighth to become the tying run. Chris Spindler came in to pitch for the Elks, a right-hander, so DeWeese was sent to bat for John Korb, but popped out and the inning led to nothing. With a raped bullpen, the Coons tried to get the bottom 8th from Ron Thrasher, who threw 12 pitches, all balls. Chris Mathis was called on to prevent the Elks from running up double digits, struck out PH Morgan Little, caught Gilbert’s soft line, and retired Garcia on a soft fly right to Medina. Top 9th, Pedro Alvarado glitched with a leadoff walk to Nunley, which put the tying run on again. Young whiffed, Ochoa failed, and then Sambrano hit for the annoyance in Ron Richards shape, and singled through the right side, sending Nunley all the way to third base. No left-handed bench pieces remained, so it was on Howard Jones to tie the game and stave off defeat. And he struck out. 6-5 Canadiens. Medina 2-5, 2B; Young 2-5, RBI; Richards 2-4, RBI; Jones 2-5; Baca 3-4, HR, 3 RBI;

**** Ron Thrasher. **** R.J. DeWeese. **** Adam Young. **** …

Game 3
POR: 1B Sambrano – CF Medina – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 2B Bergquist – SS McKnight – RF Stubbs – C Margolis – P Brown
VAN: RF K. Evans – LF E. Garcia – 1B Gilbert – CF Cameron – C J. Martinez – 2B Lawrence – 3B Tellez – SS Irvin – P McMullen

If nothing else, Nick Brown at least went further than his predecessors before burning up in a phosphate fire, logging two scoreless innings to start the contest, although that was nothing against Sam McMullen, who faced the minimum through three, walking only the debutee Matt Stubbs, who had quickly been doubled up by the useless Margolis. And after a blowup in the first on Monday, and in the second on Tuesday, Brownie met his maker in the third inning on Wednesday, walking Cesar Tellez, allowing a liner to right for a single to Irvin, and then a 3-run homer by Kurt Evans. The Coons didn’t get a hit until McKnight singled in the fifth, and didn’t reach scoring position until Nick Brown doubled in the sixth. He never reached third base – nor would any other Raccoons reach third base against Sam McMullen in this game. Brown’s line was soiled for good in the sixth with a 2-run homer by Irvin. The ninth inning saw Nunley extend his hitting streak to 13 games at the last chance with a 1-out single, and then Adam Young, hitting for DeWeese, who had looked like a dork three times against McMullen, was awarded first base on catcher’s interference. First and second with one out was by a wide margin the best chance the Raccoons had had the entire evening, and Jason Bergquist hit into a double play to celebrate it. 5-0 Canadiens.

Sam McMullen had a 4-hit shutout. I dig good pitching, but I hate it when a certain team does it to the Coons, no matter how badly they blow it.

Two home runs by left-handed batters, and both hit theirs on two strikes. That is something that would not have happened to Brownie even two years ago. While that is not all of my grief, it is certainly part of it. The march of time was all-consuming…

When the Raccoons returned home from that sweep (minus Bartels), they were read the Riot Act, just so they knew this was not all fun and games…

Thursday brought the news that the Buffaloes had claimed A.J. Bartels, so at least we were off the hook for the last $300k-some of that contract, not that it mattered, or that Bartels mattered, not as a pitcher, and not even as a human being. Don’t even come back here, ***hole, you’re **** will be mailed to you in Kansas.

Raccoons (10-16) @ Wolves (10-18) – May 6-8, 2016

Oregon was a bitter place right now in terms of baseball. Neither team looked even remotely competitive, not even when compared to other baseball teams, but when compared to a litter of newborn kitten. The Wolves ranked 11th in runs scored and 9th in runs allowed in the Federal League, but their 105 runs in the bank still beat the Raccoons by SEVENTEEN. Picture it: Portland, 2016 – the Raccoons had allowed the LEAST runs in the CL, and they were still tied for last place on Friday morning. We hadn’t played the Wolves since 2013, when we lost two of three to them, which ended a run of four straight series wins.

Projected matchups:
Hector Santos (2-1, 1.29 ERA) vs. Tim Dunn (2-2, 4.36 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (1-1, 3.55 ERA) vs. Aaron Walsh (3-2, 2.48 ERA)
Chris Munroe (0-0, 3.21 ERA) vs. R.J. Lloyd (1-4, 8.51 ERA)

The extremely red-faced Dunn, even when not angry, is a left-hander, and we might see another one on Sunday if the Wolves elect so skip R.J. Lloyd in favor of Jaden Joseph (2-3, 3.63 ERA).

Game 1
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – 2B Jones – LF DeWeese – RF Stubbs – C Margolis – P Santos
SAL: CF Cervantes – 3B J. Pena – 1B Avalos – LF Farmer – RF Ellis – C Desan – 2B Ruggeri – SS D. Stephenson – P Dunn

In terms of things we hadn’t seen in a while, the Raccoons scored first when Sandy doubled, Nunley singled, and Young at least hit one far enough to allow Sandy to tag and go home in the first inning. Santos blasted the Wolves in the first two innings, but then had to work around a leadoff double by D.J. Ruggeri in the third. Once that was accomplished, the Raccoons accidentally made it back on base. Young walked and Howard Jones singled to start the fourth inning, which brought up the king of sluggers, R.J. DeWeese, with his seven RBI, ranking approximately 57th in the Continental League. He jumped about 25 spots with his 3-run homer to right center, putting Santos ahead 4-0 (and removing the stunning Margolis from the team lead in homers with his fourth shot). The Wolves had a swift response, loading the bases with no outs in the bottom 4th on three straight singles to center by Tony Avalos, Rick Farmer, and Nate Ellis. Mike Desan rammed a ball off the wall in center for a 2-run double, and Santos would allow another run on Ruggeri’s sac fly, ruining the 4-0 lead and moving back to a 4-3 nail biter. Roberto Cervantes hit a leadoff double in the fifth, but finally Santos missed a few bats and struck out Juan Pena and Avalos to regain control before Farmer grounded out to first.

Santos was completely gassed after six innings, but at least held on to the lead. The top 7th saw Dunn retire the first two Coons before Nunley hit an infield single, Young walked, and Jones singled, loading the bases. Dunn was replaced by Law Rockburn, who had logged four outs against three earned runs for a crisp 20.25 ERA. DeWeese beat him for a 2-run single to right to create some breathing space before Stubbs struck out. Rockburn remained in for the eighth in which the Coons had them on the corners before Nunley sent a drive to left center, where he was robbed by Rick Farmer, whose great grab ended the inning. Devon Stephenson left two on when DeWeese caught his drive to left near the warning track in the bottom 8th (those would have been on Mathis), and the Coons had two on again in the ninth, Young and DeWeese being walked by Joe O’Brian (who had been part of the Cookie Carmona trade). Ochoa hit for Mathis in the #7 slot and rammed a ball to deep right and off the wall for a huge 2-run double, and Korb would end the game with a 1-2-3 ninth. 8-3 Critters. Sambrano 2-5, 2B; Nunley 2-5; DeWeese 2-4, BB, HR, 5 RBI; Ochoa (PH) 1-1, 2B, 2 RBI; Margolis 2-4, BB;

After the sixth part of the season being completed, Adam Young – he of always hitting 25 homers and 110 RBI plus some extra – had two homers and 11 RBI. Don’t multiply that.

The next morning, Hector Santos complained about a sore hamstring, but said he hadn’t felt anything in the game. The Druid didn’t think it was too serious, but Santos might still miss a start. At least the schedule will allow for some shuffling should push come to shove, with an off day on Monday, and he could sit out a few extra days and pitch next Saturday at the tail end of the string.

Game 2
POR: SS McKnight – CF Medina – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – 2B Sambrano – RF Richards – C Baca – P Abe
SAL: CF Cervantes – 3B J. Pena – 1B Avalos – LF Farmer – C Desan – 2B Ruggeri – RF J. Gonzalez – SS D. Stephenson – P Walsh

Abe got himself his own lead in the second inning with his first major league hit, a liner to right that scored DeWeese and Richards for a 2-0 lead. He didn’t allow hits in the first two innings, but allowed three in the third inning, including a single by the pitcher Walsh, and a 2-run homer by Juan Pena that put the Wolves ahead, 3-2. They also stole two bases in that inning after two bases the previous day, running circles around the Raccoons’ catchers. The Wolves then went on to hit THREE INFIELD SINGLES in the fourth inning, plating another run against the variously inept infield. How about the Raccoons exploiting other people’s ineptitude? When Rick Farmer bungled Baca’s pop for an error to start the seventh inning, Abe bunted into a force, and McKnight hit into a double play. A solo home run by Adam Young put the Raccoons one run out in the eighth inning, and they had to face Matt Cash in the ninth, but would bring up their 6-7-8 batters. Sandy Sambrano singled softly to right, which was a good start, that nevertheless crumbled to dust after Ron Richards hit one hard to Domingo Ortega at second base. Zip-zip, double play, and a foul pop by Baca removed from ending the game. 4-3 Wolves. DeWeese 2-4;

Nunley went hitless, ending his hitting streak at 14 games.

Game 3
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Ochoa – 2B Jones – C Baca – P Munroe
SAL: CF Cervantes – 3B J. Pena – 1B Avalos – LF Farmer – RF Ellis – C Desan – 2B Ruggeri – SS D. Ortega – P Lloyd

The braindead Raccoons not only managed to go hitless against a total dork of a pitcher for the first three innings, no, they also managed to put that total dork of a pitcher that didn’t have a grain of batting ability in him on base with an uncaught third strike to create a threat in the bottom of the third. Munroe, in his first major league start, buckled down and got two strikeouts to escape the inning, but the Raccoons already had made another strong impression. Lloyd would walk the bases full in the fourth inning, but the Raccoons couldn’t buy a hit, ending the frame when Jones flew out to Farmer in left. The Coons only got into the H column the following inning on a horrible bloop by Baca that happened to dink in.

Defense continued to be not Baca’s strong suit, however. After Mike Desan reached with a leadoff single in the bottom 5th, Baca airmailed Ruggeri’s bunt, uncatchable for Young, and the Wolves had runners in scoring position with no outs. Munroe contained damage, allowing a run on Ortega’s groundout, but struck out Lloyd and Cervantes to end the inning. But how on earth were the Raccoons to be expected to make up a run!? Nunley hit a leadoff single in the sixth, but nah… Munroe pitched a perfectly good game for six innings while getting nothing but hosed, then melted down with a Ruggeri double and two walks to Jonathan Pruitt and Cervantes with two outs in the inning. Mathis appeared but allowed a rocket by Juan Pena that undressed Adam Young and became a 2-run double to right. Ruggeri would drive in a run off Beaver in the eighth to make it 4-0, and the Coons were almost done and out until O’Brian walked DeWeese and allowed a single to Medina in the ninth. Matt Cash appeared with one out and struck out Richards (…) before Baca grounded slowly to the left side. Cash had to hurry with a throw to first, bang-bang play, Baca was SAFE – and went down, having taken Avalos’ elbow into the side of the back as he rushed through the bag. So, the Raccoons now had the bases loaded, Stubbs running for Baca, and Margolis batting for Beaver in vain hope of a game-tying, 2-out grand slam that never came. 4-0 Wolves. Baca 2-4; Munroe 6.2 IP, 4 H, 3 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 6 K, L (0-1);

Baca was 50% of the Raccoons’ hits.

In other news

May 2 – The Stars’ OF/1B Hugo “Tiger” Mendoza (.485, 8 HR, 31 RBI) is suffering from back problems, but that doesn’t stop him from killing every single Federal League pitcher. In the Stars’ 14-4 thrashing of the Scorpions, Mendoza collects five hits with a double and drives in one run.
May 2 – The Condors beat the Falcons 1-0 on Mike Gershkovich’s (.319, 4 HR, 14 RBI) home run.
May 3 – SAC 3B Jason LaCombe (.333, 0 HR, 6 RBI) will miss another week with back stiffness, a condition that already plagued him since late April.
May 4 – Only DEN LF Joey Kretz’ (.309, 3 HR, 11 RBI) home run in the fifth inning stands between the Wolves and a combined no-hitter. They hold the Gold Sox to that one hit and win eventually, 3-1.
May 6 – RIC SP Randy Jenkins (2-1, 4.30 ERA) could be out for the year with shoulder inflammation.
May 7 – Bad news for the Buffaloes, who might just have lost SP Ian Norman (4-0, 2.92 ERA) for the season with a fractured elbow.
May 7 – The Bayhawks homer four times in their game against the Pacifics, but still lose, 6-5. The Pacifics don’t hit a home run in the game.
May 8 – After entering extra innings tied at four, the Knights blast the Buffaloes for seven runs in the top 10th before conceding two themselves in the bottom of the inning, getting away with an 11-6 win.

Complaints and stuff

Alonso Baca will miss six weeks with a back injury, so here come more free at-bats for Danny Margolis and whatever else we can scrounge up from St. Petersburg.

You know, in times like these you have to consider how lucky we are to have … developed from single-cell organisms that made it onto land – and land itself is a miracle already! – grew paws and a snout and developed into trash can burglars. I might be reaching very far for my reasons not to kill myself right now on the spot.

I would consider trading our ****ing new designated bystanders like DeWeese and Young for spare parts eventually, but doubtlessly they would return to slugging as soon as they left Portland, so their punishment shall be to play out their contracts here and never go to another All Star game.

MORE BOOZE!!!

Also, there was no announcement of it on the Elks’ side during the game on Wednesday, which doesn’t surprise me because they are a ****ed-up conglomerate of galactic arseholes with the breath of death, but Nick Brown finished his slow-motion chase of the strikeout mark of eighth-place Carlos Asquabal. He might be on the last bip of rubber on his tires, but at least he needs only one more start of getting ravaged for five runs like that to reach 3,000:

ABL CAREER STRIKEOUTS

1st – Tony Hamlyn – 3,952
2nd – Martin Garcia – 3,783
3rd – Woody Roberts – 3,313 (HOF)
4th – Aaron Anderson – 3,225 (HOF)
5th – Carlos Castro – 3,198 (HOF)
6th – Javier Cruz – 3,164
7th – Chris York – 3,103 (active)
8th – Nick Brown – 2,996 (active)
9th – Carlos Asquabal – 2,995 (HOF)
10th – Pancho Trevino – 2,961 (active)
11th – Arnold McCray – 2,900 (HOF)
12th – Bastyao Caixinha – 2,844 (HOF)
13th – Rod Taylor – 2,831 (active)

[Westheim]

There's one happy Raccoon around right now... more at 11.

[Westheim]

The Coons called up Tom McNeela heading into this series. McNeela, the usual September addition that won’t get a hit, was batting .314 in AAA at the time of his promotion. How time between him and Margolis will be split is entirely up to those two.

Raccoons (11-18) vs. Cyclones (14-16) – May 10-12, 2016

The Cyclones ranked fifth in both runs scored and runs allowed with a +12 run differential, so they were probably also due for some better luck. What better time to start a winning streak as against these Critters? The Raccoons had not played the Cyclones since 2013, when they had taken two of three games from them.

Projected matchups:
Jonathan Toner (2-4, 3.89 ERA) vs. Shunyo Yano (2-4, 4.70 ERA)
Nick Brown (2-4, 3.60 ERA) vs. Ricky Mendoza (3-2, 4.79 ERA)
Hector Santos (3-1, 1.76 ERA) vs. Graham Wasserman (1-2, 2.01 ERA)

Game 1 was to feature something special – a matchup of pitchers that had been traded for another! Since then, Yano had won 41 games for Cincy, so it’s not like they had gotten no stick at all (just the shorter one), but I’d hold onto Jonny Toner’s stick firmly when comparing those two. Now let’s watch him get blown out for eight runs while Yano spins a shutout. It would fit this rotten season. Of course that’s not the only former Raccoon we’re going to face. Wasserman was ravaged to a 5.98 ERA last season, but seemed to have turned thing around so far in 2015. He was now 25 and due for a decent output. We would not see a southpaw in this series.

And of ****ing course Jason Seeley is hitting .344 with four homers for them as a regular centerfielder oh my god I will have to kill myself right now kill me kill me kill me –

Game 1
CIN: 1B L. Velazquez – LF R. Hernandez – C Jolley – RF Fullerton – 2B C. Martinez – CF Seeley – SS P. Morrison – 3B Moreno – P Yano
POR: SS McKnight – 2B Jones – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – CF Medina – RF Richards – C Margolis – P Toner

Toner managed to allow a triple, two singles, and smack a guy with his first ten pitches, which put him down 1-0 with the bags full and nobody out. Carlos Martinez’ K and Seeley’s pop raised hopes for a mild outcome with the (thin) home crowd, but Pat Morrison hit another single to right center (all singles dropped right in front of Ron Richards) and the Cyclones went up 3-0, at which point the game was more or less over. What really hurt was the pair of hits that Yano would have in his first two plate appearances, including a rocket double to lead off the second, though he didn’t score, because it only showed that Toner somehow had lost all his stuff over the winter and was merely cooking with water. Also, Seeley tripling and scoring in the sixth, which made me take another bite out of the edge of my desk. While Toner had lined up four zeroes in between despite two leadoff hits (including Yano’s), the Raccoons’ offense was once again and just as always mostly / completely absent. DeWeese hit a dumb-luck triple in the bottom 2nd and scored on Ron Richards’ sac fly. While he was sucking so bad that even a lowly sac fly was a step in the right direction for him, it got the Raccoons nowhere specifically. They amounted to three hits and three walks against Yano in eight innings, and were quickly quelled by Juan Jimenez come the ninth. 4-1 Cyclones.

Three hits, three walks, and not once did a Raccoon reach base with a Raccoon already on it. They are truly a royal pain.

Next, Nick Brown’s I-bet-this-won’t-work next bid for 3,000 strikeouts. He needs four, and things have been rough.

Game 2
CIN: RF Fullerton – SS Dahlke – C Jolley – 3B C. Martinez – 1B J. Ortíz – CF Seeley – LF L. Velazquez – 2B P. Morrison – P R. Mendoza
POR: 2B Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – CF Medina – RF Richards – C McNeela – P Brown

Brownie struck out Jayden Jolley to end a perfect first, then even got a lead in the bottom of the inning. Sandy singled, stole second, scored on Young’s liner to left center. This also gave Adam Young (110+ RBI for three straight years…) 13 RBI for the season, which broke a tie for the team lead, goddamnit. Juan Ortíz struck out in the second, and after Pat Morrison grounded out to start the third, Brownie victimized the pitcher Ricky Mendoza, reaching 2,999. The attendance (still sparse, but with this social media fad that’s going on everything a pitcher does will be on Foolbook in a matter of minutes anyway, so why bother to attend in 44 degrees and a biting wind?) was up and clapping when Brown got D.J. Fullerton to 1-2. Fullerton flailed at a pitch that almost hit him in the foot to end the inning, and the scoreboard in left center went completely nuts. All the colors! This being Nick Brown’s 3,000th strikeout, both teams poured out of their dugouts if not already on the field to hug and pat him between innings. Up in my office, I cried like a bitch.

While we had some vintage Brownie on the mound, allowing only three hits against eight strikeouts in the first five innings, the offense was as usual. They had runners in scoring position after McKnight and Nunley had hits in the bottom 3rd and were stranded there when Young flew out easily. The next inning DeWeese was caught stealing one pitch before Juan Medina doubled to right, with Medina eventually starved at third base. Brownie erased the top of the order with strikeouts to Fullerton and Jolley to reach 10 K through six, before the Coons had a huge scoring opportunity in the bottom of the inning. Adam Young led off with a walk before DeWeese doubled to right center. Young held, but now we had them on second and third with no outs! Insurance runs, insurance runs! Medina smacked a liner to right that Fullerton caught with a panicked Young scampering back to third base. Ron Richards was only batting .194 but was walked intentionally anyway to bring up Tom McNeela, who had amassed the grand total of 1 (one) RBI in the last four seasons. He lashed a pitch to left center, Seeley closed in on it but couldn’t get it, and it bounced to the track for a 2-run double!! Brownie hit an RBI single, and Sandy hit a run-scoring infield single before McKnight hit into a double play to end the 4-run inning. 5-0 for Brownie, who despite 10 K was on only 73 pitches through six. He walked Seeley in a full count with two outs in the seventh, but then struck out Velazquez to the crowd’s excitement. He issued another walk to Morrison to start the eighth, but a quick double play held him in the game. Fullerton bunted for a single, but Tom Dahlke struck out, giving Brown a dozen. Top 9th: Jolley grounded out to Nunley. Carlos Martinez flew out to Medina in center on the first pitch. Ortíz for the money ran a 1-2 count, which had all the fans up and chanting BROW-NIE, BROW-NIE, BROW-NIE – Brownie threw him a fastball to the corner that Ortíz didn’t go at, the ump held still for a moment, then empathically fisted Ortíz out – IT’S A SHUTOUT!!!! 5-0 BROWNIES!!! Sambrano 2-4, RBI; Young 1-2, 2 BB, RBI; DeWeese 2-4, 2B; Brown 9.0 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 13 K, W (3-4) and 1-4, RBI;

OH MY GAWD, ALL THE FEELINGS – JOY – I – I CAN’T – I JUST – WHEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

Game 3
CIN: 1B L. Velazquez – LF R. Hernandez – C Jolley – RF Fullerton – 2B C. Martinez – CF Seeley – SS P. Morrison – 3B P. Cruz – P Wasserman
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – 2B Jones – RF Medina – C Margolis – P Santos

Seeley was beaten again for a run-scoring double, this time by DeWeese and to take a 1-0 lead in the first inning before Howard Jones left him and Matt Nunley on base. That came after the Cyclones had neglected to exploit a Roberto Hernandez triple in the first inning, and they would continue to put pressure on Santos and have a man on in every inning while getting his pitch count up early. The Coons stranded Margolis, who had doubled, on third base in the bottom 2nd, and the next two innings ended with double plays hit into by Young and Margolis, respectively. While the Cyclones nibbled, but didn’t bite, and the Raccoons made a mess throughout, Santos went six and two thirds in a 1-0 game before Morrison doubled and they brought left-handed Juan Ortíz to hit for Pedro Cruz. Sugano was unwrapped from the pen, allowed a huge shot to left, but one that came back down over the track, and DeWeese just managed to get there to preserve the lead. Runners would then be on the corners against Wasserman in the bottom 7th with nobody out after a walk to Medina and a hard single to left by Margolis. Ron Richards hit for Sugano, struck out, but Sandy’s flare to right fell in for an RBI single. McKnight singled to load the bases, with Wasserman still not being removed, and conceded another run on a sac fly to Nunley, but both him and Young were no threats with fly outs to Seeley. That nevertheless put the team ahead 3-0, but they immediately made a mess. Mathis was in for the eighth, walked Hernandez with two outs, then allowed a single to center to Jolley. Hernandez went to third, Sambrano’s throw there was utterly wild, and Hernandez scored, with Jolley to second. Mathis allowed another RBI double to Fullerton before being yanked, but Seung-mo Chun fared no better, blowing the lead with an RBI single to center by Carlos Martinez. The game entered extra innings when McKnight hit a 2-out double in the bottom 9th and was thrown out at third base by Fullerton. Thrasher struck out the side in the top 10th, and when Nunley hit a leadoff single off Jimenez in the bottom 10th, Bergquist ran for him. That one worked: Young singled, moving him to second, and when DeWeese singled hard through the right side, Bergquist was just barely fast enough to score from there. 4-3 Critters. Sambrano 2-4, BB, RBI; McKnight 2-5, 2B; Nunley 3-4, RBI; DeWeese 2-5, 2B, 2 RBI; Medina 2-3; Margolis 2-4, 2B; Santos 6.2 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 5 K;

Only four runs from 14 hits. Oh my…

Raccoons (13-19) vs. Indians (22-13) – May 13-15, 2016

Somehow – which was all we could say about it – the Indians led the CL North, just ahead of the Crusaders and Canadiens, with the third-least runs allowed and an average offensive output. Not only did they lead the division, they were also the best CL team and third overall in the ABL. They had also swept the first 3-game set of the year from the Raccoons.

Projected matchups:
Tadasu Abe (1-2, 3.86 ERA) vs. Dan Lambert (3-1, 2.14 ERA)
Chris Munroe (0-1, 3.05 ERA) vs. Jason Clements (2-3, 3.52 ERA)
Jonathan Toner (2-5, 4.08 ERA) vs. Tom Weise (4-3, 3.97 ERA)

Another three right-handers, as these Indians do not currently employ a left-handed starting pitcher.

Game 1
IND: LF Baker – CF J. Wilson – 2B Kym – 1B S. Guerra – RF Gilmor – C Padilla – SS Matias – 3B Tolwith – P Lambert
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – 2B Jones – LF Ochoa – RF Richards – C McNeela – P Abe

For the third game in a row, the Raccoons scored a single run in the first inning, this one after singles by Sandy and McKnight, a successful double steal, and then little happened. Nunley grounded out, plating Sambrano, Young lined out softly to first, and Jones grounded out to third. The Indians would lose Dan Lambert to injury before long, and he left runners on the corners with two outs in the third inning. Pat Kling replaced him, walked Ochoa, then got a ****ty easy fly from Richards to escape trouble. The score remained 1-0.

Nunley would then tack on a pair of runs with two outs in the bottom 4th, plating Sandy and McKnight with a double that split John Wilson and Nick Gilmor in right center. Both had reached on bloop singles off Kling, who then loaded the bases by hitting Young and walking Jones, but got away with a full plate once again when Danny Ochoa bounced out to Santiago Guerra at first. The Coons didn’t maintain the shutout for much longer. Abe had struggled with control for a while, and when he walked Aaron Tolwith in the fifth inning the Indians bunted him over with Kling before Josh Baker’s single scored him, 3-1. The Coons added a run in the sixth when they got their first two batters on but were then held to a Young sac fly by Fernando Hernandez jr., and Abe departed after seven decent innings, still holding on to the 4-1 lead, and the pen came remarkably close to blowing it in the eighth inning right away. Baker homered off Beaver, 4-2, and then mathis allowed a single to Jong-beom Kym and a double to Nick Gilmor before Dave Padilla thankfully struck out. The Arrowheads went on to donate the Coons a free run in the bottom 8th, putting Nunley on with an error and advancing him with a Mike Daniels wild pitch. Juan Medina’s pinch-hit single plated him. Thrasher would then alternate strikeouts and walks in the ninth inning to end the game just before it would get dicey. 5-2 Coons. McKnight 3-5; Nunley 3-5, 2B, 3 RBI; Medina (PH) 1-1, RBI; McNeela 2-3, 2B; Abe 7.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 3 BB, 4 K, W (2-2) and 1-2;

Three in a row? Must be witchcraft involved.

Next, the Indians would skip Clements and go right to Tom Weise. We might see Alejandro Mendez (3-3, 4.02 ERA) on Sunday then.

Game 2
IND: LF Baker – CF J. Wilson – 2B Kym – 1B S. Guerra – RF Gilmor – C Padilla – SS Mathews – 3B Tolwith – P Weise
POR: 1B Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – CF Medina – 2B Jones – RF Richards – C McNeela – P Munroe

Fourth game in a row with a lead in the first inning! This time McKnight got on, but was forced on Nunley’s grounder. Nunley, however, remained on base long enough for R.J. DeWeese to come up with a crushing 2-run homer that was no doubt outta here right off the bat. The Coons then took their usual nap, except for Munroe, who was perfect the first time through the order and ended up retiring the first 11 before Kym doubled, but was left on after Guerra struck out. Flip to the bottom of the frame, where three soft singles loaded the bases with nobody out, but with Munroe batting. He grounded the first pitch in the general direction of the shortstop, but Joey Mathews missed it and Munroe had his first career hit and RBI. Sandy brought home the fourth run of the game with a groundout, but when McKnight lifted a ball out to Gilmor, McNeela was thrown out at home after going at a not too urgent pace after tagging. Juan Medina’s first home run as a Critter ran the score to 5-0 in the bottom 5th. Munroe was still maintaining shutout pace, but the Indians started to encroach on him. He used just under 50 pitches for the first five innings, but shot to almost 88 after seven innings. He issued a walk in each inning and things got drawn out. The Indians, however, still didn’t score, mostly also due to Guerra utterly failing them in the cleanup spot and striking out with two on to end the sixth. Meanwhile the Coons kept adding runs: McKnight hit a 2-run homer in the bottom 7th off righty Brandon Smith. Munroe managed another inning in scoreless fashion, but even with a 7-0 lead his pitch count had exploded too far to send him back out for the ninth. Juan Gallegos promptly found a way to blow the shutout and got bombed for two runs by Padilla, but the Coons held on to the big picture with their fourth straight win. 7-2 Furballs. Sambrano 2-4, 2 2B, RBI; McKnight 2-4, HR, 2 RBI; Medina 2-4, HR, RBI; Munroe 8.0 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 6 K, W (1-1) and 1-3, RBI;

This was the second time we scored more than five runs this month. And the sixth time we scored more than five runs this entire season. Yuck.

But we’re on a positive run differential now……

Game 3
IND: LF Baker – CF J. Wilson – 2B Kym – 1B S. Guerra – RF Gilmor – C Padilla – SS Mathias – 3B Mathews – P Clements
POR: CF Medina – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 2B Bergquist – C Margolis – P Toner

Jonny allowed a leadoff single to Baker in the top 1st, but then came back with nine straight outs to get through the early innings, whiffing five. Meanwhile the Coons didn’t score in the bottom 1st for the first time since Tuesday, and didn’t make up for it in the next few innings, either. The next runner the Indians had would be John Wilson, who reached on an error that was charged to Toner when he stumbled upon fielding Wilson’s grounder. Wilson didn’t get to grin for long, for Toner picked him off first base a few pitches later.

The bottom 4th saw DeWeese walk and Richards double with two outs, but Bergquist grounded out to Raul Matias and nobody scored again. Jonny walked Gilmor to start the fifth, then struck out three in a row (giving him nine for the game), then singled in the bottom 5th and was moved around with a wild pitch and Nunley single to give himself a 1-0 lead. Fortunately, Jonny had shaken off whatever had bothered him for the last weeks and threw a real gem in the Indians’ face. Through seven, they still only had their leadoff hit from the first inning, and nothing else, but Toner’s pitch count was on the rise with a dozen strikeouts to his name and he was due to lead off the bottom 7th. But there was probably another inning in him (not quite at 100 pitches) and he batted for himself, but made the first of three quick outs. Top 8th, Padilla led off with a grounder to short that McKnight bobbled and was charged an error. Never mind, Jonny’s on it! Matias also grounded to short, and McKnight had that one, 6-4-3 fashion. Toner struck out Mathews on his 100th pitch, his 13th K of the game. The ninth inning would start for him with Mike Denny, a right-handed catcher with a 1.093 OPS in 37 AB, pinch-hitting in the pitcher’s spot. Well, I would really like to have Toner face Denny anyway, even if we should go to Ron Thrasher for the two lefties in the 1-2 spots. Denny grounded out to short on an 0-2 pitch, and Toner remained in the game. Josh Baker grounded out to short at 0-1! John Wilson was up as the Indians were an out away from getting swept by the lowly Raccoons! Wilson grounded to the right side, but Bergquist didn’t get it, and Wilson had a single, 28 batters after the most recent Indians hit in the game. Right-handed Jong-beom Kym appeared, batting .220 with one homer. Also, Todd von LIndenthal made an appearance with Jonny Toner, inquiring on how the old 3-inch howitzer was doing. Apparently fine, since he was satisfied with Jonny’s response, gave him a hard pat on the back and sprinted back to the dugout. Then Kym singled to left on the first pitch, and the Indians sent left-handed Ape Britton, well-travelled coonskinner, to pinch-hit. Red Alert! Ron Thrasher came in right now! He certainly put the crowd through the ringer, slowly building up a full count with Britton before finally burying a sinker off the outside corner that Britton tried to reach in vain. 1-0 Coons! Richards 3-3, 2B; Toner 8.2 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 13 K, W (3-5) and 1-2, BB;

In other news

May 11 – In the first instance of a Titan hitting three home runs in one game, BOS C Tim Robinson (.325, 10 HR, 27 RBI) launches three bombs and four hits total for 8 RBI in the Titans’ 15-8 win over the Buffaloes.
May 12 – Selling already? The Loggers trade SP Chester Graham (3-3, 3.40 ERA) to the Scorpions for 3B Isiah Reed (.239, 1 HR, 9 RBI) and unranked pitching prospect Ramon Maestas.
May 12 – The Gold Sox beat the Crusaders 1-0 on a homer by 1B Mun-wah Tsung (.277, 7 HR, 27 RBI).
May 13 – The Stars obliterate the Wolves in a 16-5 rout. The Wolves also make four errors to help them out.
May 14 – Topeka’s Bill Adams (.360, 2 HR, 9 RBI) returns from injury, but his first game doesn’t go as planned. The Blue Sox hold him dry in five at-bats, ending his hitting streak at 25 games.
May 14 – The Crusaders will be without SP Jaylen Martin (3-2, 2.63 ERA) for two weeks. “Midnight” Martin banged his shoulder in an on-base collision and needs to rest the sore joint.
May 14 – After breaking his kneecap, 39-year old ATL LF/RF Lionnel Perri (.182, 0 HR, 3 RBI) might have reached the end of the road. He definitely will not play again in 2016.
May 15 – Out of nowhere, BOS SP Scott Spears (3-0, 1.45 ERA) 3-hits the Canadiens in a 5-0 shutout.
May 15 – Shoving an umpire nets ATL 1B/LF Gil Rockwell (.236, 13 HR, 27 RBI) a 3-game suspension.
May 15 – The Buffaloes beat the Blue Sox, 14-9. Both teams put up at least a handful of runs in the fourth inning, with the Blue Sox scoring seven, only to give five right back.
May 15 – Scorpions and Pacifics play 14 innings. After being tied 5-5 after regulation, both teams score twice in the 11th before the Scorpions’ pair of runs in the top 14th gives them a 9-7 win.

Complaints and stuff

20 years, 10 months, 26 days after being drafted 293rd overall in the next-to-last round of the 1995 draft, Nick Brown became the eighth pitcher with 3,000 ABL strikeouts. The Hall of Fame is undeniably his, and I will probably never make another pick like that.

Ah-ah! Don’t object. You’ve seen the scum I’ve been drafting the last 20 years. The last ten years alone yielded Matt Nunley and … whom exactly!? The only other players besides him and Brownie on the current 25-man roster that were drafted by us are: Tom McNeela, Chris Mathis, and Matt Stubbs. Matt WHO?? That guy that never plays. Ah, THAT guy.

On the side, Brownie threw his 17th career shutout. It’s his second in 2016, and the first time he has thrown multiple shutouts in a season since 2011.

To my great disgust he had to share the spotlight that Wednesday night with Tim Robinson (who went on the become CL Player of the Week), but I will console myself with getting drunk at Brownie’s Hall induction in a few years.

So before we get too deep into the euphoria section, the Druid told me that Cookie worsened his shoulder while working out and might miss the rest of the month. That is not good on so many levels…

Also, Yoshi Nomura was FL Player of the Week, batting .444 with no homers and 6 RBI. He’s rapping it at a .356 clip with 2 HR and 23 RBI for the year.

Yoshiiii…

[Westheim]

Raccoons (16-19) vs. Loggers (13-24) – May 16-19, 2016

This was our first series against the Loggers in 2016, and it would be for four games. They had lost seven straight games (much opposing the Raccoons’ 5-game winning streak), allowing the most runs (5.9 per game!), which was an amount of raging failure on the mound that even the third-best offense in the league couldn’t possibly pick the slack up for. After beating them up 16-2 two seasons ago, the Raccoons had merely won 11 of 18 from them in 2015, so there was some pace to gain on what had last week rapidly become the worst team in the Continental League (by record).

Projected matchups:
Nick Brown (3-4, 3.00 ERA) vs. Joey Van Buskirk (0-0, 3.27 ERA)
Hector Santos (3-1, 1.51 ERA) vs. Michael Foreman (0-2, 4.72 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (2-2, 3.47 ERA) vs. Brian Cope (2-2, 4.35 ERA)
Chris Munroe (1-1, 2.20 ERA) vs. Jason McDonald (2-6, 6.20 ERA)

Only right-handed starting pitchers for the Loggers, and they only have one reliever.

Odd things happenin’: the Loggers ranked 6th/5th/4th in team slashing in the CL, but had the third-most runs. The Critters ranked 7th/6th/7th and had the least runs. Also, with the streaks going on, Van Buskirk will DEFINITELY fire a shutout in a 13-0 blowout over Brownie’s soon-to-be-dead corpse.

Game 1
MIL: RF Hodgers – SS Howell – LF Dally – 1B M. Rucker – 2B Enriquez – CF Cooper – C Griffen – 3B I. Reed – P Van Buskirk
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 2B Jones – C Margolis – P Brown

Two walks and a McKnight single loaded the bases with no outs right in the first inning for the Critters, and at first it looked like the precious middle of the order would only have salad rather than take in some steak. Adam Young flew out to shallow center in a way that kept everybody pinned, and when DeWeese flew out to right, that also only got Sambrano home. However, power came from an unlikely source, and Ron Richards smashed a fastball outta rightfield for a 3-run homer, giving Brown a quick 4-0 lead. For Van Buskirk, the bleeding would never really stop and he allowed single runs in the next two innings before being removed from the game before Brownie ever gave up a hit. Tom Nelson was in for the bottom 4th, but allowed a run before he retired anybody. McKnight reached, Nunley reached, and Young singled home McKnight, 7-0. That was all in the inning because DeWeese flew out again and Richards hit into a good ol’ double play, and the top 5th started with an infield single for Victor Enriquez, the first Logger to reach on his own merit in the game (Brown had drilled Rob Howell in the first inning), and he was soon brought around to score on two more singles.

Tony Harrell did the impossible and pitched a scoreless inning for the Loggers in the bottom 5th, but the Coons would be all over him in the sixth, as McKnight, Nunley, and Young again opened a frame by reaching base as a group, all with singles, plating McKnight and putting runners on the corners for DeWeese, who was 0-for-2 and angry, and utterly exploded a 3-1 fastball for a massive 410+ footer to right center, blowing the score to 11-1! One more run would be scored in the eighth inning after an Ochoa triple and a Margolis single. Brownie was also done after eight, throwing almost 110 pitches, and Juan Gallegos was tasked with tending to an 11-run lead. No Logger reached base on his watch. 12-1 Brownies!! McKnight 4-5, RBI; Nunley 2-3, BB, 2B, RBI; Young 2-3, BB, RBI; Ochoa (PH) 1-1, 3B; Margolis 2-5, 2 RBI; Brown 8.0 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 8 K, W (4-4) and 2-4;

Yikes, offense! Still last in runs scored, though. Our previous season high in terms of runs in a game had been eight, achieved twice overall and once in a loss.

Game 2
MIL: C T. Delgado – SS Howell – LF Dally – 1B M. Rucker – 2B Enriquez – CF LeMoine – RF Cooper – 3B I. Reed – P Foreman
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 2B Jones – C Margolis – P Santos

After last night’s blowout, the Loggers scored in the first inning against the CL ERA leader Santos, although the run was unearned after Nunley airmailed Justin Dally’s grounder for a 2-base error that allowed Tony Delgado to score unimpeded from second base after a leadoff double. An unearned run in the bottom 1st then tied the game. Andrew Cooper botched the pickup on R.J. DeWeese’s single to right, allowing McKnight to scamper home rather than stop at third base after hitting a double himself. Another error on Michael Foreman loaded the bases in the bottom 2nd. He had thrown wildly past Isiah Reed when fielding Santos’ bunt with Richards and Margolis on base, which admittedly added up to zero speed, but that throw was still horrendous. Bases loaded with one out for Sandy, who was eager to do damage after another so-so start to this season, was close to striking out, but was then smacked by Foreman, which shoved home Ron Richards with the go-ahead run, 2-1. Three more runs would score in the inning on a groundout by McKnight, a single by Nunley, and finally a wild pitch before Young popped out over home plate to end the inning, with the Coons ahead 5-1. The bases were loaded yet again in the bottom 3rd after a walk to Richards and two singles by Jones and Margolis, but with one out it was Santos to bat. He was a career .177 batter that had started this season 0-for-18, so there was not much to expect. He struck out, and Sambrano followed him, head down low back to the dugout.

The Loggers had yet to concede defeat, however, and weren’t going to for a while. They had the game tied before Santos could count his strikeouts, plating two in the fourth on a walk to Justin Dally and an Enriquez triple with subsequent sac fly by Chris LeMoine, and scored two more in the fifth to get even at five, with Dally hitting a 2-out, 2-run double to tie the game. Foreman was already out of the game, which could only be good for Milwaukee, but Santos was still in, at least until LeMoine hit a 1-out double in the sixth. Kevin Beaver came in to replace Santos and **** up as hard as he could, allowing the run to score on two more singles. Isiah Reed brought home the go-ahead run, 6-5, and in the seventh the Loggers continued to mount the pressure. Seung-mo Chun put on Mike Rucker with a 2-out double, then walked Enriquez. With three lefties next, Sugano came out, but the Loggers drew a right-handed pinch-hitter in Oscar Sandoval, whom Sugano nevertheless whiffed to end the inning and strand two. In the bottom of the inning, Toby Wood was in his second frame of the game, and generously missed the strike zone most of the time. Young hit a leadoff single, and DeWeese walked. Ron Richards got two balls before Wood was forced to come into the zone a bit, but came in really fat, and Richards doubled into the rightfield corner to plate both runners and flip the score in favor of the home team. Jones walked and Margolis grounded out to put runners in scoring position with one out, but both Medina and Sambrano failed and left them on base. The top 8th started with a 4-pitch walk that Chris Mathis issued to Andrew Cooper, but luckily Reed hit into a double play. A McKnight double to lead off the bottom of the inning didn’t lead to a run because when him and Young were on the corners, DeWeese struck out and then Young was picked off by Dave Walk. The top 9th saw Ron Thrasher in his element, walking both Delgado and Howell to start the inning before getting to the left-handed meat of the order. Dally struck out, Rucker struck out, only two days of harm left in form of the right-handed batting Victor Enriquez, who was the first to put a ball in play in the inning, doing so on the first pitch, which he rolled over gently to McKnight for the last out. 7-6 Critters. McKnight 2-4, BB, 2 2B, RBI; Young 3-5, RBI; Richards 3-3, BB, 2B, 2 RBI;

Ron Thrasher now has 13 walks in not even 10 innings. I feel like we should look for a closer somewhere. Maybe under my bed, there’s all kinds of chunk under there, and I am fairly confident I can find SOMETHING that will result in less walks than that.

Still, seven in a row is seven in a row.

Game 3
MIL: RF Hodgers – SS Howell – LF Dally – 1B M. Rucker – 2B Enriquez – CF LeMoine – C T. Delgado – 3B I. Reed – P Cope
POR: 2B Jones – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Ochoa – CF Medina – C McNeela – P Abe

The Loggers took another lead in the first on a Mike Rucker moonshot, his ninth homer of the year, that also plated Victor Hodgers, who had hit a leadoff double off the wall in left. Justin Dally would join his team mate in his next attempt and also vomited a 2-run homer over the rightfield wall in the third inning, that one also collecting Hodgers, who this time had reached on a walk. Brian Cope sat down the first ten Raccoons that dared to show up against a mediocre right-handed pitcher before McKnight singled. He stole second base, which turned out not to be necessary since Matt Nunley went deep to center, cutting the Loggers’ lead in half, now at 4-2. While Abe negotiated his way through seven innings – somehow – the Raccoons were not seeing the ready victims of the last few days on the mound. Cope went six and was largely unharmed, with DeWeese striking out as the tying run in that inning, and Ron Richards struck out as the tying run to end the seventh against Robby Delikat. The eighth inning saw Delikat walk McKnight with one out, which prompted the Loggers to move on to Tom Nelson, who had already been handed a card by the Coons’ offense in this series. Here, however, Nunley played the Coons out of the inning on one pitch, hitting into a double play to Rob Howell. Closer Troy Charters was lucky to get the first out in the bottom 9th when Enriquez had to leap to snag Adam Young’s liner, but then got DeWeese easily on a foul pop before walking a so far horrendously ineffective Ochoa. That brought up Medina, who hit a 1-0 pitch hard to left, but right to Dally, and the game and the Raccoons’ winning streak were over. 4-2 Loggers. Medina 2-4;

Over night then, the Loggers blew up their lineup with a trade with the Knights. They shipped Justin Dally (.253, 7 HR, 25 RBI) down to Atlanta, and received a package of five prospects in return, including THREE top 100 prospects: #15 C Adam Redmond, #77 CL Gary Ledford, and #95 1B Pat Turner!

Game 4
MIL: RF Hodgers – CF Cooper – 1B Rucker – LF LeMoine – C T. Delgado – 2B Enriquez – SS O. Sandoval – 3B I. Reed – P McDonald
POR: CF Medina – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF Ochoa – RF Richards – 2B Bergquist – C Margolis – P Munroe

The Coons could have had a nice change of pace after Medina reached on a single to center and McKnight got on with an infield single in the bottom 1st, but then never moved them to even third base as the middle of the order collectively flunked out, which came just before Munroe flunked out, too. LeMoine opened the top 2nd with a single to center, he then walked Delgado, and the gates opened from there, with two runs across in the inning. Margolis in the second and Ochoa in the fourth hit into double plays, and before that Jason Bergquist certainly tried to but Enriquez was not enough of a defender to turn it. He did have the occasional power burst, though and homered off Munroe with two outs in the sixth, putting the Loggers 3-0 ahead. This was the first of three really hard blasts off Munroe in a row. Sandoval doubled to right center after that, and then Isiah Reed homered, which sucked all the air out of the attending fans. Nunley had McKnight on first base after a 1-out walk in the bottom of the sixth, and hit into the team’s third double play of the day as they couldn’t even dream of holding a candle to the usually dismal McDonald, who turned the fourth double play himself in the bottom 7th after allowing a 1-out single to Ochoa and walking Richards, but the equally dismal Bergquist fed him the perfect exit ticket. Someone like McDonald ought to have a ‘best before’ date, but the Raccoons blatantly missed even that, putting two on in the bottom 8th when he was already at 110 pitches, but McKnight and Nunley made poor outs to waste even that tiniest of chances. McDonald finished a 5-hit shutout by getting Young, Ochoa, and DeWeese all to fly out more or less easily to Chris LeMoine in the ninth inning. 5-0 Loggers. Stubbs (PH) 1-1; Korb 3.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 1 K;

This was the first career hit for Matt Stubbs, who did not get a start while up here because we never faced a left-handed batter, and whose days were now numbered, not just for batting .100 in his brief stint, but because …

Waiver claim

… the Crusaders had an embarrassment of riches over there on their decadent East Coast, and they didn’t know where to put all the personnel, and so it happened that INF Shane Walter (.322, 1 HR, 8 RBI) found himself on waivers in the middle of the week. 26-years old, batting left-handed, and usable all over the infield with a secure and steady glove, he was a career .276 batter. Power was not his game, but he had hit 31 doubles between Pittsburgh and New York last season.

The Raccoons were awarded his minimum contract on Friday. He will be under team control through the end of 2018 at least. To make room on the 25-man roster, Matt Stubbs was sent back to St. Petersburg.

Since we don’t get much production between our three potential second basemen, and Sandy Sambrano is needed in centerfield right now regularly anyway, Walter will be on Howard Jones’ throat for the moment. We hope to have Cookie Carmona back within ten days, which is the time window to clear a roster spot one way or the other. The ideal scenario would be to flick Jason Bergquist for a relief pitcher that doesn’t kill us, although that could be hard…

Raccoons (18-21) vs. Condors (22-18) – May 20-22, 2016

Tijuana was trying to get back to the playoffs and they were at least in second place right now with a balanced team that ranked third in runs scored and fifth in runs allowed. They could certainly use bullpen help, as their pen was bleeding for a 4.63 ERA. This was the first meeting between these two teams in 2016, but the Condors had won the last two season contests, with the Coons lying down 4-5 in 2015.

Projected matchups:
Jonathan Toner (3-5, 3.44 ERA) vs. Zach Boyer (5-1, 2.81 ERA)
Nick Brown (4-4, 2.76 ERA) vs. Manuel Rojas (3-4, 3.76 ERA)
Hector Santos (3-1, 2.21 ERA) vs. Michael Colvard (2-3, 5.20 ERA)

Jonny Toner is somewhat mild-mannered compared to me, but I’m sure he would agree with me wanting to shove a baseball down ****ing Zach Boyer’s throat so hard …! Make that another one shoved up his arse. I have a bad feeling about this opener. Again, no southpaws to be seen.

From the category “I can’t believe that I’m not crying yet”: Jimmy Oatmeal ties for the CL lead in homers with 13.

Game 1
TIJ: SS Dasher – 1B Gershkovich – RF Branch – LF Eichelkraut – C Vargas – CF Feldmann – 2B Lafon – 3B D. Jones – P Boyer
POR: SS McKnight – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – CF Sambrano – RF Richards – C McNeela – P Toner

Jonny had some wild tendencies early on, drilling Jose Vargas and moving him to second base with a wild pitch in the second inning, but the Condors did not get a hit and struck out five times the first time through the order. While the first hit for the Raccoons came in the third inning, a McKnight single, the Condors had to wait until the fifth inning when Vargas got his revenge and hit a leadoff single to right. Neither scored, and we had a really good pitching duel on our hands. Ron Richards had a leadoff walk in the bottom 5th, but ended up left on third base, while Jonny reached 10 K after sniffing out Craig Dasher for the second out in the top 6th (Boyer sat on only 2 K, but he was a control pitcher anyway), then watched in horror as Mike Gershkovich lashed a 2-2 pitch to deep right center, where Sandy Sambrano appeared out of nowhere and stole a double. It would be Matt Nunley to put some salt into the soup in the bottom of the sixth inning, homering to right center to give those guys something to pitch for. Jimmy Oatmeal’s weak grounder to third was the only contact made by the Condors in the seventh as both Ezra Branch and Vargas struck out, giving Jonny a dozen. He would not get another one, opening the eighth with a pitch that hit Ryan Feldmann. While that was not the end in itself, with Roland Lafon hitting into a pretty clear double play, Dan Jones then belched a 2-1 pitch to deep center and outta here, tying the score at one. Toner even walked a confused Boyer before Dasher grounded out to third base.

Top 9th, Ron Thrasher was in the game and – shock! – issued a leadoff walk to Gershkovich, who was run for by the rather awesomely named Gordie Polifka. When DeWeese spoiled a drive by Branch to left, Polifka tagged and tried to reach second base, but found himself thrown out by DeWeese to his own manager’s visible abhorrment. Oatmeal struck out. The Coons couldn’t get anything done against Boyer, who went into the tenth inning, but was replaced by Entwistle after a pinch-hit single by Ochoa. McKnight grounded out, ending the inning. Chun pitched a scoreless top 11th before Entwistle walked Nunley with one out in the bottom of the inning. Bergquist came out to run for him, didn’t get a jump, but reached second base anyway when Entwistle walked Young on four pitches. The Coons walked off when Lafon missed a roller up the middle by DeWeese by mere inches and Bergquist dashed home on the throw. 2-1 Raccoons! Ochoa (PH) 1-1; Toner 8.0 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 12 K; Thrasher 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 3 K;

The teams combined for EIGHT hits in 11 innings, a testament to the elite starting pitching at work here.

Game 2
TIJ: SS Dasher – 1B Gershkovich – CF Feldmann – RF Branch – C Vargas – 2B Lafon – LF Eroh – 3B D. Jones – P Rojas
POR: CF Medina – 3B Walter – SS McKnight – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 2B H. Jones – C Margolis – P Brown

The Condors got going really early in spelling out their starter’s nickname for Brownie, which was “Doom”. While Portland’s own struck out Dasher to start the game, Mike Gershkovich launched a homer to left rather quickly. The battery of Brown and Margolis, paired quite frequently so far this season, was not up to par, conceding a stolen base in both of the first two innings, with the latter leading to the Condors’ second run, Roland Lafon scoring from second base on Dan Jones’ single. While his day job on the mound didn’t go as planned, but at least yielded no more runs through five innings, Brownie also had to be his own best friend with the bat, as the Coons managed two double plays in their first four innings, including one where Brown was rolled up by Medina after hitting a 1-out single in the third inning. Brownie came to bat in the fifth inning with the tying runs on the corners and two outs, and hit another single to center to at least get the suckers onto the board, now down 2-1. Medina didn’t explicitly try to help, grounding to Lafon, but Lafon blew the ball and loaded the bases with the error. Shane Walter, 2-for-2 after going hitless in his Coons debut, flew out to Feldmann to strand three. Somewhat dejected for being peed on by his own team, Brown allowed singles to the first two guys up in the top 6th, but Walter made up for at least a bit of the frustration by starting a nifty double play on the hot corner that bailed Brown out of the inning. He did not allow another run while going seven innings on 99 pitches, and was hit for by Ochoa in the bottom 7th with Nunley on second after a 1-out, pinch-hit double. While Ochoa grounded out, at least Medina hit a single to center to tie the game and take Brown off an undeserved hook.

It would be Chris Mathis to get in line for the W when Ron Richards’ 2-out double chased home Adam Young in the bottom of the eighth. However, now the predicament: Ron Thrasher had pitched two innings the previous day (to no great benefit), and they had been long innings. He was out of the question. With right-handed bats up, and not trusting the struggling Mathis with a second inning, we turned to Seung-mo Chun, who had yet to allow an earned run. He promptly allowed a leadoff single to Jose Vargas. Two grounders later, Craig Abraham walked in a full count, bringing up right-hander Alfonso Gonzales to hit for “Doom” Rojas, and we *really* had no other options, and the Condors weren’t big enough idiots to send a left-handed bat with Sugano looming in the pen. Gonzales rolled the 2-1 pitch slowly to third base, Walter hustled in and made a bare-handed blind pick before throwing to first on the run – precisely into Young’s glove and barely in time! 3-2 Critters! Walter 2-4, 2B; Nunley (PH) 1-1, 2B; Brown 7.0 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 4 K and 2-2, RBI;

With this win we ditched the Titans and made it all the way up to fourth place. Whooo, on the move, baby! Never mind that after opening the week with 19 runs in the first two games with the Loggers, we had now once more scored only seven runs from our last four games. We had been 11th in runs scored after the Tuesday game. That was over again.

Game 3
TIJ: SS Dasher – 2B Lafon – RF Branch – LF Eichelkraut – CF Feldmann – 1B M. Herrera – C Gonzales – 3B D. Jones – P Colvard
POR: CF Medina – SS Walter – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Ochoa – 2B Sambrano – C McNeela – P Santos

Santos’ first pitch pretty much deflowered Craig Dasher, and we were off to the races again. While Dasher crawled to first base in obvious pain, the grimaces in the Condors’ dugout were dark, and they soon went to work on Santos. Lafon doubled, putting runners in scoring position (although Dasher was blue in the face) before Santos struck out Branch at 2-2, Oatmeal at 2-2, and was 2-2 on Ryan Feldmann before losing him to a 2-run double to deep right. Feldmann also scored when Mike Herrera singled to left, giving the Condors a speedy 3-0 lead and Santos probably the loss already. He had quite definitely achieved a loss by the second inning, allowing a leadoff single to the pesky Jones, and then had a brain fart on Colvard’s bunt, taking it to second base while having no chance against Jones. The Condors had two on until they had none on, Lafon emptying the sacks with his first homer of the year, a 3-run shot to left, 6-0 Scavengers. Santos would linger into the fifth inning until removed with one out and Ezra Branch on first base after a single. John Korb came on and before he and McNeela were on the same page, Branch took off. McNeela fired a throw to center, moving Branch to third base, but he was left stranded after a foul pop by Feldmann and a K that Korb hang on Herrera. The Raccoons, however, had so far amounted to one hit against Colvard and were not in a position to given the home crowd even the faintest hope of a comeback. They wouldn’t get onto the board until the sixth inning when DeWeese singled home Shane Walter, and that was already with two outs, and it wasn’t until the eighth that the Coons managed to get the tying run to put on his pants. Young had hit an already soft 2-out single against the increasingly annoying Colvard, and then DeWeese reached on an infield single. Down 6-1, Ochoa batted, but was sat down with a howling strikeout. The Condors got a run off Beaver in the ninth, but hardly anybody was left to witness the act. 7-1 Condors. Young 2-4; DeWeese 2-4, RBI; Bergquist (PH) 1-1; Gallegos 2.2 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K;

In other news

May 16 – The Bayhawks pitch a combined 1-hitter against the Knights, winning 6-0, despite losing their battery of Joao Joo (6-1, 1.87 ERA) and Pat Eaton (.265, 0 HR, 4 RBI) to injury in the first few innings. ATL INF/RF Edwin Gutierrez (.333, 0 HR, 0 RBI) has the Knights’ sole hit, only his third hit of the season, off Anthony Bryant (1-0, 1.54 ERA) who pitches 5 1/3 innings in relief for the win.
May 16 – IND SP Dan Lambert (3-2, 2.20 ERA) will be out until early June with a sprained elbow.
May 19 – A torn triceps will put RIC SP Chris Domingue (6-1, 3.97 ERA) out of action for up to three months.
May 19 – The Titans acquire CF/1B Jasper Holt (.148, 0 HR, 1 RBI) from the Bayhawks for SP/MR Chae-ku Lee (2-1, 4.63 ERA) and a prospect.
May 21 – The Bayhawks could be without SP Gabriel Caro (5-0, 3.65 ERA) for most of the remainder of the season. The 32-year old is nursing chronic shoulder soreness and could be out until September.
May 21 – Cyclones and Stars play a wicked game in Dallas. The hosting Stars blow a 5-3 lead in the ninth with three runs scored by the Cyclones, who can’t close the affair either, and the Stars force extra innings on a home run by Hugo “Tiger” Mendoza (.436, 11 HR, 43 RBI). The Cyclones will break out for five runs in the 12th inning, and then almost blow that lead as well, with the Stars scoring three runs before Stephen St. George grounds out with the tying runs in scoring position to end the game.
May 21 – In Sacramento, the Scorpions blow an 11-10 lead in the ninth against the Miners, and both teams score twice in the 11th before the Scorpions walk off in 12 innings, 14-13. A dazzling 11 home runs are hit in this game, five by the Miners and six by the Scorpions, and no single player hits two!

Complaints and stuff

Maddening number of the week: Danny Margolis has started 20 games this season, has appeared in 28, and has 79 plate appearances. Somehow, he’s managed to hit into 11 double plays. That’s Quebell to the Murphieth power.

We damn hard need a catcher or at least Baca back (magic eight ball says “ask again later”), and also some relief to bolster the seventh/eighth inning. We also need some goddamn ****ing runs to be scored at times, for ****’s sake!! The team isn’t even bad in getting on base, they are into the upper half in getting on base. But they’re just stickin’ there. Or Margolis comes up and hits into a quadruple-play: 6-4-3, and up the first base line a pretzel vendor faints in horror, misses a step and falls onto a kid with glasses. They are certainly quite the test for an unprepared eyewitness.

They have now scored eight runs in their last five games (combined, in case you’re wondering), and even though this **** has been going on for seven weeks, this is clearly the worst they’ve fared so far. Previous low was 11 runs in the five games from April 17-22, which started with the double-header that wasn’t one against the Crusaders and at the tail end saw a 4-game losing spree ended by Jonny Toner’s shutout against the Knights.

For as long as Nick Brown’s career has lasted, only one Raccoons outfit was as bad in terms of runs scored: the 2005 team managed 3.4 runs per game. This one sits at the same depressing mark. 2005 was the year that Yoshi Yamada almost broke the single season stolen base record, while batting for a .496 OPS.

In a bizarre occurrence, former Raccoons incited a brawl on Tuesday, as the Rebels’ Luis Reya (.297, 2 HR, 12 RBI) went after the Cyclones’ Graham Wasserman (1-2, 2.51 ERA), which turned into something close to the Battle of Chancellorsville. Both were suspended for a week by the league to think about their evil actions.

Randy Farley was on waivers by the Baybirds this week. At 42, he’s finally done. He can’t find the strike zone anymore. In 16 innings he had walked 14 batters and pitched to a 6.19 ERA.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (20-22) @ Bayhawks (26-16) – May 23-25, 2016

The Baybirds were leading the South with a brisk .619 pace, and they hadn’t even played the Raccoons yet. This was the most potent offense in the Continental League, whacking out 5.4 runs per game, but they could use another good pitcher or two or five. Their rotation ranked in the bottom 3 and they were overall conceding the seventh-most runs. Their run differential of +43 did hint at greatness, however. We beat the Bayhawks 6-3 in 2015.

Projected matchups:
Tadasu Abe (2-3, 3.71 ERA) vs. William Raven (3-3, 5.15 ERA)
Chris Munroe (1-2, 3.12 ERA) vs. Jared D’Attilo (1-0, 3.47 ERA)
Jonathan Toner (3-5, 3.14 ERA) vs. Clark Johnson (0-0, 1.93 ERA)

First, that’s another three right-handers. Second, these three Birds have 28 appearances, but only nine starts combined. Johnson would make his first start of the year after the Bayhawks just put Gabriel Caro on the DL, where he will share time with Milt Beauchamp. They could also elect to send lefty Joao Joo (7-1, 1.89 ERA) on short rest and reassemble the remaining pieces on our common off day on Thursday, but we will have to see about that.

Catching at the Bay: Dylan Alexander, who is – of ****ing course – batting .302 with 5 HR and 27 RBI. He was one of four ex-Coons in their lineup, and none of them were even close to worse than in their time in Portland.

Game 1
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – 2B Walter – RF Richards – C McNeela – P Abe
SFB: RF Almanza – 1B McIntyre – LF Alston – CF D. Garcia – C D. Alexander – 3B J. Rodriguez – SS R. Miller – 2B V. Flores - Raven

While the Raccoons managed to hit into a double play right in the first inning, and at the first possible opportunity thanks to Ronnie McKnight precisely grounding to Vic Flores with Sambrano having singled before him, Tadasu Abe only needed ten pitches to put five Bayhawks on base – all that he faced. The first four all hit singles, plating two runs, and then he walked Alexander. After a strikeout to Javy Rodriguez and a 2-run single by Ryan Miller that hurt especially, Abe brought home another run with a wild pitch as the Bayhawks took a 5-0 lead in the first inning. Top 2nd, DeWeese led off with a single before Walter hit into a double play, which was enough to leave the nice enough suite for the visiting team and have a little walk, possibly down to the Bay, and to see whether it was possible to find a hidden corner to drown yourself in.

Turns out, no, there’s some water police dorks patrolling around and they fish out anybody. So by the time I had been dried and warmed up with a standard issue blanket, and had signed some paperwork that claimed it was all an accident and I had no intention to become a body in the water after all in order to avoid a medical examination (last thing I need now is professional help…), I just in time made it into a bar close to the Bay that was mostly deserted but ran the game on a TV to see Tom McNeela break up the shutout that William Raven had carefully knitted on for the last two-plus hours, a 2-out double in the top of the seventh. The Bayhawks were still up 6-1, and although I didn’t ask the elderly patron next to me, who with his stained monocle and his unkempt beard that sported a multitude of grays looked like a cross between the leader of a suicide cult and a 1930s hobo, he readily informed me that the Bayhawks had shown that Japanese import of those goddamn skunks and had rattled him for six runs in just four innings. ‘Damn Nips!’ he called out reportedly, shaking his fist. The bartender had an eye on him, but didn’t say anything. I saw Gallegos pitching in the bottom 7th with a pitch count of 18, which was all that I really needed to know about how things were going. Top 8th, former Coons farmhand G.G. Williams balked in a run while Danny Margolis was batting with two in scoring position and two outs, a recipe for not scoring if there ever was one, and every time there was a close-up of Margolis, my new friend would yell ‘Damn Nip! Damn Nip!’. Margolis obviously struck out against Jayden Maness, much to the old guy’s amusement, which only grew bigger with the 2-out, 2-run double that Chris Almanza hit off Mathis in the bottom of the inning. Goddamnit, I needed some relievers, and something to shove down that old yeller’s throat. Thankfully the Coons caused no commotion in the top of the ninth and the game ended quickly so that I could trot back to the hotel. 8-2 Bayhawks. Sambrano 2-4; Jones (PH) 1-1; DeWeese 2-3, BB; McNeela 2-4, 2B, RBI; Gallegos 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K;

Game 2
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – RF Richards – LF Ochoa – 2B Jones – C McNeela – P Munroe
SFB: RF Almanza – 1B McIntyre – LF Alston – CF D. Garcia – C D. Alexander – 3B J. Rodriguez – SS R. Miller – 2B Claros – P D’Attilo

For a moment early in this middle game I wondered whether I was in the wrong park. Ron Richards singled home McKnight with two outs in the first inning to give the Raccoons a 1-0 lead, but once Ochoa walked and Howard Jones fouled out with the bases loaded I was assured that I was watching the horrendous Raccoons trying to swing a stick. They would get a second run in the third inning when Matt Nunley went first-to-third on an Ochoa single, but scored when Almanza’s throw to third was well up the leftfield line. The lead didn’t hold up, despite Munroe being perfect the first time through, but he would be everything but the second time. Almanza hit a leadoff single in the fourth, stole second and made it to third on McNeela’s second throwing error of the series, and the Baybirds then got hard hits from Ron Alston and Dave Garcia to tie the game. The Critters would scratch out a new lead, 3-2, in the top of the fifth, but Will McIntyre’s leadoff jack in the bottom 6th erased that, and Munroe was then removed after a 2-out single by the damned Alexander. Beaver came in to face the lefty Rodriguez, whom he walked, before Ryan Miller’s RBI double put the Bayhawks ahead. For fun, Raul Claros would also hit an RBI single, 5-3, and they made it 7-3 before long when John Korb (so far without an earned run conceded this season) was taken deep by Dave Garcia for two in the seventh. The Raccoons didn’t look like a threat in the ninth inning, despite a leadoff single by Sambrano off Jeff Boynton. After a pop to third, Nunley dinked a single to center, however, sending Sandy to third. Adam Young’s 3-run homer was nice, sure, but it didn’t tie the game. It did provoke the Bayhawks to send Chae-ku Lee, however, and he retired Richards and DeWeese quickly to seal this game. 7-6 Bayhawks. Sambrano 2-5; Walter (PH) 1-2; Nunley 2-4, BB; Richards 2-5, RBI; Ochoa 2-3, BB, RBI;

I wonder what the Raccoons could get from a team dumb enough to trade for R.J. DeWeese’s services, with roughly $22.3M remaining on that contract.

Game 3
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 1B Jones – C McNeela – 2B Bergquist – P Toner
SFB: RF Almanza – 1B McIntyre – LF Alston – CF D. Garcia – C D. Alexander – 3B J. Rodriguez – SS R. Miller – 2B M. Robinson – P C. Johnson

It seems like DeWeese can sense the doubts and whenever that happens he finds a way to rip one and dispel them. That happened in the first inning. McKnight had singled and Nunley had doubled, and DeWeese pulverized a Johnson offering for a 3-run homer to right. Under normal circumstances this should have given Jonny plenty of room to pitch a great game, but somehow this wasn’t meant to be an easy afternoon once more. The Bayhawks made hard contact three times in the first inning. While that resulted in three outs, Toner never really got to dominate them, striking out only two (including the pitcher) in the first three innings, while allowing two doubles (luckily in different innings) and plenty of other hard shots across the park. A DeWeese triple in the third inning aside, the Raccoons didn’t amount to much of a threat (much less a run) after the early rampage, and just when Toner seemed to have found something of a groove and had retired six in a row he smacked Almanza with one out in the sixth. Almanza made everybody dizzy, dancing on and off first base, but repeated throws did nothing to shut him up. The Bayhawks ended up not getting another hit (or base), but Toner’s pitch count was rising as well, and was also starting to sabotage his own team’s already pathetic offense. When Bergquist reached on an error by Javy Rodriguez in the top of the seventh, Toner first got him forced out with a poor bunt, then was himself picked off first base. The Bayhawks put runners on the corners in the bottom 7th after a bloop double by Alexander that DeWeese played in an extremely ****ty way, and a Jones error, but Sambrano made the catch on a medium-difficulty Mike Robinson fly to left center, hissing off DeWeese, to end the inning.

Toner met a sticky end in the bottom 8th then, finally. Pat Eaton had a leadoff single, but was forced out on Almanza’s grounder. McIntyre’s single brought up the tying run and it was nobody less than Ron Alston. Sugano was called on, walked Alston, and departed having achieved nothing but damage. Mathis replaced him, and allowed an RBI single to Dave Garcia on the only pitch he threw. Now with a 3-1 lead and the bags still full, Ron Thrasher was asked with getting two outs from the two lefties and then finish the game. Alexander hit an enormous shot to center that Sandy Sambrano gauged forever before he made the catch at the edge of the warning track. McIntyre scored, 3-2, but Rodriguez struck out to end the inning. The Coons amounted to nothing in the top of the ninth, and Thrasher got a quick groundout from Ryan Miller to start the Bayhawks’ last chance at a comeback. Then Armando Chavez singled, and so did Jaime Mateo. Facing Almanza, Thrasher lost it completely and walked him on four pitches to load the bases. That wasn’t all, though. Thrasher walked PH Vic Flores to tie the game, and walked Alston to complete the sweep. 4-3 Bayhawks. DeWeese 2-4, HR, 3B, 3 RBI; Toner 7.1 IP, 5 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 0 BB, 6 K and 1-3;

So that’s it with Ron Thrasher (12.2 IP, 17 BB) closing games… or doing anything outside of refilling the Xerox with paper.

Of course we have no replacement closer. We have no closer, we have no setup guys, we have no offense, we have no Cookie, we have no second baseman, and we have no prospects to stuff any hole.

For ****’s sake…

Raccoons (20-25) @ Falcons (22-24) – May 27-29, 2016

The Falcons had their issues, too, ranking eighth in scoring and tenth in allowing runs in the Continental League. They had taken over 10th place in starter’s ERA from the Bayhawks thanks to the latter getting three days off against the incredibly terrible Raccoons. The Falcons had yet to win a game against the Raccoons in 2015, having been swept in the first series between the teams in April.

Projected matchups:
Nick Brown (4-4, 2.74 ERA) vs. Bobby Guerrero (4-2, 4.99 ERA)
Hector Santos (3-2, 2.98 ERA) vs. Ron Carter (3-5, 4.66 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (2-4, 4.40 ERA) vs. Dave Beebe (2-3, 3.78 ERA)

Another entirely right-handed rotation to fail against.

Game 1
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Medina – 2B Jones – C McNeela – P Brown
CHA: SS P. Hall – 2B D. Carter – LF Nieves – C Holliman – RF Mugan – CF J. Jimenez – 1B F. Soto – 3B Best – P Guerrero

In a stunning twist, the Raccoons mangled Bobby Guerrero for seven runs in the first inning, starting early with a single by Sandy and a 2-run homer hit by McKnight. Nunley singled, DeWeese was hit, and Medina hit into a force at second base before Guerrero walked first Jones, then McNeela, the latter with the bases loaded, 3-0. Nick Brown came up, singled hard to center to score two, and then Sandy scored two more with a hit up the rightfield line to make it 7-0. Annoyingly then, Nick Brown’s first seven pitches resulted in a walk and two deep fly outs to center, and Todd von Lindenthal was out there early to yell some sense into him. Ryan Holliman then grounded out to end the inning, and Brown seemed to make an adjustment between innings and got six mostly easy outs in the next two innings, with Steve Huibregtse hitting for Guerrero in the bottom 3rd, but he then issued his second walk to Dave Carter to start the bottom 4th, threw a wild pitch, and saw Carter score on two groundouts. He walked Steve Best and Paul Hall in the fifth before Carter ended the inning with a foul pop, so things were actually quite dicey here, despite a 6-run lead. The Coons were by now facing left-handed relievers that knew their craft, so there was no offense to be had anymore, unless perhaps Paul Hall would throw away a double play grounder, which he did in the top of the sixth, putting Sandy and McKnight both on base with no outs. What was the matter, Nunley wondered, hit into the double play instead, and Young grounded out on the first pitch in his continued quest for futility. Both bullpens would crumble a bit late, with the Raccoon scoring single runs in the seventh and eighth, while John Korb allowed a run in the bottom 8th. The game ended fittingly, with the Falcons having Jimenez and Best on base and Beaver pitching with one out in the bottom 9th when Adrian Quebell (.277, 4 HR, 23 RBI) hit for the relief pitcher, straight into a double play. 9-2 Brownies! Sambrano 3-6, 2 2B, 2 RBI; McKnight 2-5, HR, 3B, 2 RBI; Jones 2-4, BB, 2B, RBI; Brown 7.0 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 4 BB, 3 K, W (5-4) and 2-4, 2 RBI;

Game 2
POR: 2B Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – CF Medina – RF Richards – C Margolis – P Santos
CHA: 2B Best – CF Huibregtse – 1B Quebell – C Holliman – RF Mugan – SS P. Hall – LF J. Jimenez – 3B F. Soto – P R. Carter

The Coons had runners on the corners in the first inning, but DeWeese grounded out to strand them. The bases were loaded in the third inning after a leadoff single by Santos (the first for him this year), another single by McKnight, and Nunley getting drilled in the ribs. Young came up with one out, eager to do damage to either team, and settled for a sac fly to left, scoring the first run of the game, which did a little bit of damage to both. DeWeese then struck out. Santos, coming off two rotten starts the previous week, got three groundouts in the first, three strikeouts in the second, and three flyouts in the third, retiring 11 Falcons in total before Quebell hit a 2-out single to right in the bottom 4th, though that didn’t lead to anything. Offense was literally dead until after the middle of the seventh, when Quebell continued to keep the Falcons fans engaged with a 1-out double. Santos, so far having nursed a 1-hitter, immediately lost a few limbs. He hit Troy Mugan, then allowed another single to pinch-hitter Domingo Nieves, loading the bases with two outs and switch-hitter Jose Jimenez approaching. Colonel von Lindenthal went out to go over the motions of throwing a ****ing baseball with Santos, then threw up some barbed wire between third base and home plate, pointing at Quebell and yelling ‘Thou shalt not pass!’ – Jimenez struck out, ending the inning and preserving a 1-0 lead. Santos got another two outs in the bottom 8th before the left-handed top of the order approached and we sent out Sugano once more. Steve Best grounded out to end the inning, and Sugano remained in the affair for the bottom 9th. Huibregtse grounded out, Quebell struck out, but that brought up Holliman, who was a right-hander with a .313 average and nine dingers. Chun was sent for him, but couldn’t find the zone. One ball, two balls, three balls, and suddenly Holliman swung at a pitch that was low but more or less in the middle of the plate. He wonked it a ton to center, chasing Medina back, back, back, and all the way to the track, where he made the catch. 1-0 Furballs. Nunley 2-3, 2B; Santos 7.2 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 7 K, W (4-2) and 1-3;

It’s May and we’ve taken the season series against the Falcons, which seems odd.

This was also the last game of this set. The Sunday contest was rained out, which is a mild understatement for the storm that came crashing in just before the first pitch would have been thrown by Dave Beebe.

The game has been rescheduled for September 19 as part of a double header in Portland, in which the Falcons will be the home team. While both teams have common off days before that, there is no chance to reschedule the makeup date without giving either team a string of more than 20 games without an off day.

In other news

May 24 – 33-year old NYC CL Salvadaro Soure (2-0, 1.40 ERA, 12 SV) nails down his 400th save in protecting the Crusaders’ 6-4 win over the Knights. A four-time Reliever of the Year and 2013 FL Pitcher of the Year, Soure was oringinally signed by the Raccoons out of Venezuela, but never pitched for them, instead debuting with the Bayhawks at 19. He has been in All Star seven times, and is 64-64 with a 2.05 ERA and 1,310 K for his career.
May 24 – The Aces concede two runs in the top 10th to the visiting Canadiens, but then run up three runs themselves with a 2-run double by Bill Miller (.268, 1 HR, 17 RBI) walking them off with a 5-4 victory.
May 26 – NAS 1B/2B Marcos Garza (.341, 1 HR, 19 RBI) has run a hitting streak to 20 games with a single in the third inning of the Blue Sox’ 5-1 win over the Warriors.
May 28 – Nashville’s Marcos Garza (.333, 1 HR, 20 RBI) finds himself unable to extend his hitting streak to more than 21 games, being held dry by the Gold Sox in their 7-4 win over the Blue Sox.
May 28 – Crusaders and Thunder play a 15-inning marathon in Oklahoma City which the Crusaders end up winning, 5-4.
May 29 – SAC 3B Jason LaCombe (.346, 1 HR, 18 RBI) rips the Rebels for five hits in a 14-5 crushing, driving in three.

Complaints and stuff

Cookie Carmona will start a rehab assignment early next week. I think three games might be sufficient to get him back on track, maybe four. Well, he’s been out a month, there’s no need to re-break him now. But he should wear a brown cap again by the weekend. The timer on Alonso Baca still reads about two to three weeks before he could start a rehab assignment.

I tried to trade Jason Bergquist for a bullpen piece early this week, which didn’t work out. His trade value right now is about zero.

The amount of players that leave Portland and blossom seems to match the star players that come here to die. I have to intensify my attempts to find out about this particular gypsy curse.

Next week: Knights, Titans. After that, the Crusaders at home. Brrrr.

(I'm also on the draft pool, which is key this year with five picks in or close to the top 50!)

(Yes I know I will only draft more human garbage)

[Westheim]

2016 DRAFT POOL ANALYSIS

As usual, the ABL has released the pool for the annual Rule 4 draft. With the Raccoons having five picks in the first 50-some, this could be a draft to refill a much depleted farm system!

From the 360-strong ABL draft pool, the Raccoons have cherrypicked 97 players that we consider at least interesting, 50 pitchers and 47 position players. And then there is of course the (in)famous hotlist with the dozen or so players I would put into my shopping cart right away... (players with * are high school players):

SP Ben Nafe (14/12/9) *
SP Vince Drake (11/12/12) *
SP Chris Klein (13/15/11)
SP John Waker (12/13/14) *
SP Killian Savoie (10/12/16) *

SP/CL Steve Casey (14/13/14) *

CL Ryan Corkum (17/13/12)

C Jaiden Jackson (9/13/10) *
C Kyle Hearn (12/12/10)

1B Pat Fowlkes (14/11/10)

OF/1B/2B Chris Erskine (17/7/9)
RF/LF/1B Dan Brown (10/14/13)
OF/2B/3B Dave Menth (11/12/12) *
LF Brian Miser (11/11/12)

There is an additional comment to be made for two of these guys. The first would be Steve Casey, who is his own category, because while he is one of the foremost high school starting pitchers and throws his fastball and curve to devastating effect, he does not have much of a third pitch at all, which is kind of unfortunate for somebody who will turn 19 this year. While I do suspect him to make the major leagues in relatively short order, I don’t think he can survive as a starter and will be one of those Juan “Chubby” Martinez (whoah, way back to the 90s!) types, the setup reliever that is efficient for a very long time, but neither a closer nor a starter.

The other special case would be Jackson, who has a frack ton of power for a catcher, but unfortunately his case is a good study for that just because the other kids throw rocks at you in some urine-stained backyard in one of New York City’s many problem neighborhoods, and you try to deflect them off your face with your hands, doesn’t mean you’re a catcher. It hurts to watch him getting hit either in the beans or the chin by bouncing balls. He is no catcher, he is at best a backstop. A team that drafts him would have to find him a position, and that could be a REAL challenge. Outside of first base I don’t see any employment opportunities and even then he would probably be a Tetsu Osanai type of defender. Tetsu’s bat could lift the damage he did in the field (he made it to the Hall despite a relatively brief career after all), but there haven’t been many like him in the meantime. Maybe Gil Rockwell on the Knights is the first Osanai since Tetsu himself. Hardly a defender, he murders baseballs efficiently enough to be a key player.

The Raccoons have the #9 pick in the draft, and then four supplemental round picks starting with the #30 pick. I’ll go out on a limb and say that the top three SP’s we have there will definitely be taken by then and so will be Erskine and Brown (though Dan Brown would be a convenient superstar for a poor, battered GM that kisses his Daniel Hall and Nick Brown baseball card good night before going to bed…). Between the rest it’s hard to tell. Casey is probably a dodgy affair and we need results on the farm. I think John Waker might be a good pick at #9, also from New York, two backyards over from Jaiden Jackson (he’s probably the one throwing rocks at Jackson). He has a normal build that looks like it can take the stress, there is some promise to the curve/changeup combo he sports to an admittedly not too impressing fastball. Also plays with a fork. He’s also a left-hander. Yup, I think John Waker it would be (assuming that the three SP ahead of him are taken by then).

[Westheim]

Raccoons (22-25) @ Knights (22-27) – May 30-June 1, 2016

The Knights had won their last three games, and their offense ranked second in the Continental League, despite their league-worst batting average, which somehow was a thing although my head refused to wrap itself around it. In that regard, they kind of were the counter-Raccoons. Their pitching stunk, however, with the third-most runs allowed, with neither rotation nor bullpen being remotely up to the task. The Coons so far were 2-1 against them in 2016.

Projected matchups:
Chris Munroe (1-3, 3.57 ERA) vs. Felipe Ramirez (2-5, 6.09 ERA)
Jonathan Toner (5-4, 2.61 ERA) vs. Stephen Quirion (4-5, 3.93 ERA)
Nick Brown (5-4, 2.61 ERA) vs. Shaun Yoder (4-2, 2.47 ERA)

These will be another three right-handed starters to contend with. Since this has gone so well so far…

The rain on Sunday turned out to be bad news for Tadasu Abe, who was blatantly skipped and would probably not return to the mound until Saturday or Sunday.

Game 1
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – RF Medina – 2B Jones – C McNeela – P Munroe
ATL: CF M. Reyes – SS Hibbard – RF Dally – LF Rockwell – 2B Downing – 1B Berman – C Speed – 3B W. White – P F. Ramirez

The Knights had yet to get a home run from Justin Dally, whom they had acquired a few weeks ago from the Loggers, but they got one from Dennis Berman, 40 years old and in his first season in the Continental League, when he took Munroe deep to left in the bottom 2nd with a solo shot, the first tally in the game. It was Berman’s 322nd career homer with 1,527 RBI, both marks putting him in the career top 10 in the respective category. Talk about some player. Berman’s homer came half an inning after the Coons had had two on and no out after DeWeese had walked and Medina reached on a bloop single, but didn’t do anything with that (Howard Jones had less RBI on the year than Nick Brown).

Third inning, next scoring opportunity for the road team. Sandy drew a leadoff walk, after which McKnight and Nunley singled to load the bases for the middle of the order. They scored zero runs, with Adam Young lining out to Berman, who doubled up an astray Nunley, and Josh Downing caught DeWeese’s liner to end the inning. In response to that, Felipe Ramirez hit a leadoff double in the bottom 3rd, and Munroe generated enough 3-ball counts to allow the Knights to load the bases, although they also scored only one run when Gil Rockwell legged out his grounder to short to beat Jones’ return throw at first base, staying out of the double play and allowing Ramirez to score.

Munroe lasted five innings, being hit for in the top 6th in another nominal scoring opportunity, and one to salvage the game. DeWeese had tripled and scored on Medina’s single, all with one out, pulling the Coons back to a 2-1 deficit. Jones had grounded out, but moved Medina to second, which prompted an intentional walk to McNeela and the Knights moving to their pen as well, with right-hander Joey Hopkins appearing. If that was not a provocation to send Ron Richards… who took two strikes before lifting one into Dally’s comfort zone to end the inning. While the Raccoons would eventually find themselves in a tied game in the seventh, this was owed to Berman’s old and slow play in the field, which helped them to two singles in the inning, one for McKnight, who ended up scoring on the latter single, which was DeWeese’s. Young had walked in between, and with two outs and two on, Medina flailed against left-hander Quinn McCarthy. Singles by Marty Reyes and Devin Hibbard off Kevin Beaver to start the bottom 7th were however enough to give the Knights a new lead, Gallegos allowed another run in the bottom 8th (after McNeela had doubled with one out to no effect in the top of the inning), and the ninth pitted the Coons against lefty Mike Tharp. McKnight struck out before Nunley walked. Bergquist hit for Gallegos in the #4 slot and singled to center, bringing up the go-ahead run in DeWeese, who didn’t look quite as dead as most others in the lineup, struck out anyway, and Medina grounded out to Hibbard to end the game. 4-2 Knights. McKnight 3-5; Bergquist (PH) 1-1; DeWeese 2-4, BB, 3B, RBI; Medina 2-5, RBI;

We out-hit them, 11-9, and we stranded a full dozen. I have run out of logical explanations for this, except for the aforementioned gypsy curse, or perhaps the entire team consists of traitors. What the **** do I know?

Game 2
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – LF DeWeese – 2B Walter – RF Richards – C Margolis – P Toner
ATL: CF M. Reyes – SS Hibbard – RF Dally – LF Rockwell – 2B Downing – C Luna – 1B Berman – 3B W. White – P Quirion

The Coons had their first two men on in the game, after which they successfully held still long enough to score some runs, and that was meant literally. Young didn’t budge when an errant fastball came at his butt, filling the bases, and DeWeese then accepted a walk to push home Sandy. Shane Walter hit a sac fly, 2-0, before Richards struck out to end the inning. Over the next four innings, the Coons would then twice kill offense with a double play, and twice not exploit a double with less than two outs – if it hadn’t been for Berman’s holey glove. McKnight had hit a 1-out double in the fifth and had moved up on Nunley’s groundout. Young grounded to the pitcher, Quirion lobbed badly to first, and Berman was stripped naked by a nasty bounce and was charged the error that allowed McKnight to score. The Knights were still looking for a way to intrude into scoring position, something they didn’t manage to achieve through six innings, either, being held to two singles and a walk by Jonny Toner, who nevertheless had suffered through a few long innings early with 3-ball counts and the like and was probably not in for a complete game.

The Coons had a change to knot the sack on the Knights in the seventh, when Sandy and Nunley were on the corners after a pair of singles. Young came up with one out, struck out (…!), but DeWeese chipped a single to right in a full count, moving Nunley to third in addition to bringing home the Critters’ fourth run. Shane Walter shanefully grounded out. Next inning, lefty Felix Colón pitching for Atlanta. Richards led off with a single, and Margolis hit one, too. Jonny sat at 96 pitches, but was asked to bunt, which he failed to do twice. At 1-2, he got the swing sign and hit a soft line over Berman for a single to load the bases with no outs. Colón struck out Sandy, got a pop from McKnight, and struck out Nunley. FOR ****ING ****’S SAKE, YOU ****ING ********S!!! While I splintered a wooden stool into toothpicks in my suite, Berman doubled on Toner’s 97th pitch of the game, the first Knight to reach second base the entire game. He got two more outs before Reyes singled, which promoted a move to Chris Mathis, who had nothing better to do than to allow an RBI single to Devin Hibbard. A messy outing by Mathis that resulted in another run in the ninth after Downing tripled and scored on Ruben Luna’s groundout eventually went down as a save, but really was nothing to put on one’s resume. 4-2 Critters. McKnight 2-5, 2B; DeWeese 2-4, BB, 2 RBI; Richards 3-4; Margolis 2-4, 2B; Toner 7.2 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 6 K, W (4-5) and 1-4;

Another 12 LOB game, yeesh.

We end the month of May with 176 runs scored. Okay, we have up to four less games played than some other teams, but there are teams in the FL that are approaching 260, 270 now. The CL is a bit slower in scoring, but the only other team under 200 runs scored are the Thunder at 198.

Game 3
POR: CF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – RF Ochoa – 2B Jones – C Margolis – P Brown
ATL: CF M. Reyes – SS Hibbard – RF Dally – LF Rockwell – 2B Downing – 1B Berman – C Luna – 3B W. White – P Yoder

Sandy walked, yet was caught stealing in the first inning, which ended up costing a run after Nunley’s single and DeWeese’s homer. While the 2-0 lead was soon diminished to 2-1 by Justin Dally’s solo home run in the bottom of the inning, the Raccoons quickly moved into annoyance mode, hitting doubles early in innings only to leave the runner on third base. This happened to Ochoa in the second and McKnight in the third, and Ochoa hit another leadoff double in the fourth inning. Howard Jones, who was bemoaning his lack of playing time, singled to center to move Ochoa to third, and then Margolis came through with a single to right, 3-1. Brownie plated another run with a single to right center, a soft fly that JUST beat Justin Dally. The top of the order then failed collectively, but at least the lead was up to 4-1 … for like three seconds. Brown allowed a leadoff walk to Rockwell in the bottom of the inning, and Dennis Berman and Wade White both hit doubles to pull the two runs from the top of the frame right back.

Top 5th, next interesting situation. DeWeese led off with a single to center, after which Yoder lost both Young and Ochoa to walks, thus filling the bases with nobody out. Jones struck out, Margolis popped out, and while Brownie bounced a quick one to Berman, the opposing veteran managed to take it in the chest, somehow, and scrambled to the bag for the third out. The Coons would leave Nunley on third base in the top 6th, while Wade White had his second 2-out RBI hit of the game in the bottom 6th, tying the score at four, but it didn’t remain tied, because Rockwell would hit a 2-out RBI single in the bottom 7th that finally broke Nick Brown’s back and that of the ****ing team of misfits around him. Ron Thrasher finally managed to mangle the box score for good in the bottom 8th, allowing a leadoff single to Berman before walking Luna. Wade White grounded to Bergquist at second, who let go a ****ing **** throw that Young couldn’t come up with, and the Knights proceeded to score three runs on Thrasher, who also walked another left-hander in Dally, in the inning. Just to rub salt into the wounds, the Raccoons would score two runs in the ninth inning after DeWeese got hit with two outs. Young and Ochoa both hit RBI doubles just to make fun of me. 8-6 Knights. Nunley 2-5, 2B; DeWeese 2-4, HR, 2 RBI; Ochoa 2-4, BB, 2 2B; Jones 2-4, BB, 2B, RBI; Medina (PH) 1-1;

Only 11 left on base in this game, so that’s certainly progress. There was also work for the Druid, with Juan Medina having hurt himself on the bases. He was not diagnosed until Friday morning, but it didn’t look too short-term and we had to get Cookie Carmona back on the roster, and made the switch anyway on Friday morning. Medina to the DL, Cookie back onto the 25-man after missing the entire month of May. He’s already out of finally starting at least 140 games in a season.

I didn’t talk to anybody after that Wednesday game, nor during the flight to Boston, nor during our off day in Boston, although several players came scratching at my hotel room door, nor the whole day on Friday. Leave me the **** alone, scum.

Raccoons (23-27) @ Titans (25-29) – June 3-5, 2016

The Titans were not a good team, either, sharing the Knights pitching futility with the second-worst pitching in the league, and they were also not scoring any runs, ranking 10th in the CL. They did have the Coons’ number though, and led the season series 5-1 at this point. Their case wasn’t helped by a ridiculously long DL that held seven players, including all their left-handed starting pitchers (so three more righties on the weekend), as well as familiar damage dealers Steve Butler and Jasper Holt.

Projected matchups:
Hector Santos (4-2, 2.63 ERA) vs. Ian Rutter (4-2, 2.94 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (2-4, 4.40 ERA) vs. Dave Priest (6-1, 3.29 ERA)
Chris Munroe (1-3, 3.57 ERA) vs. Scott Spears (4-2, 2.68 ERA)

I have a hunch that the Titans will find some runs against the #2 pitching in the CL, while the Raccoons will look like dorks again vs. the #11 pitching.

Game 1
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 1B Sambrano – 2B Jones – C McNeela – P Santos
BOS: SS M. Rivera – 2B J. Gutierrez – LF M. Pruitt – C T. Robinson – RF X. Williams – 3B T. Thomas – 1B Greene – CF Arnold – P Rutter

Cookie reached on an error and DeWeese was plunked, but that was not enough to score a run in the first inning. Scoring was deferred to the home team by the kind Raccoons, with Santos issuing a leadoff walk to Xavier Williams in the bottom 2nd that snowballed into two runs on hits by replacement players Miles Greene (double to center) and Bob Arnold jr. (single to left). The Raccoons had their two best scoring chances wasted in identical fashion, when Ron Richards struck out to end the first and third innings, both with two men aboard. Ian Rutter maintained shutout pace comfortably through the middle innings and didn’t look like he needed much help. Santos was battered again by the replacements Greene and Arnold, who went into scoring position with one out in the bottom 7th. Santos struck out pinch-hitter Armando Galan, which removed Rutter after nine strikeouts and to Rutter’s utter dismay, then left for Thrasher to face the left-handed pest Mike Rivera with two outs. Rivera popped out on the first pitch, which left the Coons with a nominal chance against the Titans’ dismal bullpen. Or maybe Jayden Reed, a right-handed with a 6+ ERA, would saw off Nunley, DeWeese, and Richards on nine pitches in the eighth inning… Ron Sakellaris was then in for the ninth, got Sambrano, but then came Shane Walter and CRUSHED a pitch for a solo homer, and finally getting the Coons on the board, now in a 2-1 game. McNeela would have been hit for with Young, but now batted for himself and doubled, with Young batting for Thrasher and striking out. Cookie grounded out to Miles Greene, and game over. 2-1 Titans. Walter (PH) 1-1, HR, RBI;

Somehow, the Raccoons managed to leave eight on base, which was more than I could remember ever being on base in this game.

This Bob Arnold is the kid of the Bob Arnold of the 80s and 90s that was also on the Titans, and also twice on the Raccoons (1990-91, 1993).*

By Saturday we were also informed of the extent of Juan Medina’s injury. He had a torn labrum, and that would probably put him out of his misery for the season. He will be arbitration-eligible this winter, but how much desire are we going to have for a 33-year old arbitration-eligible outfielder with a shot shoulder?

Game 2
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – 2B Sambrano – RF Ochoa – C McNeela – P Abe
BOS: SS M. Rivera – 2B J. Gutierrez – LF M. Pruitt – RF X. Williams – 3B T. Thomas – 1B Greene – C Galan – CF Arnold – P Priest

Cookie opened the game with a triple and scored on McKnight’s groundout to Gutierrez, with DeWeese being hit yet again in the opening inning, but there was no noticeable from the rather indifferent Raccoons dugout. Matt Pruitt (yeah, that one) flipped the score rather immediately with a 2-run homer collecting Gutierrez in the bottom of the inning, which I couldn’t really be mad for, since I had spent years and years praying to all the baseball gods who would listen that he find his power stroke.

Danny Ochoa’s 2-out double would chase home Sandy from first base to tie the game in the fourth, 2-2, but Abe had not a good time out there. While he struck out seven through four innings, he also had immense traffic volumes on the bases at all times, and finally collapsed in the fifth inning, in which he loaded the bases with the top of the order and had nobody out. Sugano came in to see to left-hander Xavier Williams, who was batting .144 in 153 AB, but romped a grand slam on a 2-1 pitch. Sugano faced three more batters, retired none, and when John Korb replaced him, the misery continued. All of Sugano’s runs scored, and once Korb drilled Rivera and walked Pruitt with the bases loaded and two outs, Williams came pretty darn close to his second slam of the inning, but flew out to DeWeese on the warning track. Nevertheless, there was no doubt that the Raccoons were beaten after a 7-run fifth inning. DeWeese was hit again in the sixth inning, and nobody cared. Young singled and got forced by Sambrano. Ochoa hit an RBI single, 9-3, before McNeela whiffed. Ron Richards hit for Korb, walked, and that ended Priest’s game. Reliever Brett Dill came in, a right-hander, but walked Cookie to shove home another run, 9-4, before McKnight grounded out to Tom Thomas. When Dill put Nunley and DeWeese on base to start the seventh inning, Young hit into a double play. Horrors didn’t cease until the Titans ran the score to a dozen against Kevin Beaver, who also hardly retired any left-handed batter, and Seung-mo Chun in the bottom 8th. 12-5 Titans. Carmona 1-2, 2 BB, 3B; Ochoa 3-5, 2 2B, 3 RBI; Gallegos 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 0 K;

**** Ron Richards, Danny Ochoa is in the lineup.

With this haunting loss, the Raccoons dropped to a negative run differential again (188-191). I see no point in even communicating a glimpse of hope that they might return to a positive one.

For years.

Game 3
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – RF Ochoa – 1B Young – 2B Jones – C Margolis – P Munroe
BOS: SS M. Rivera – 2B J. Gutierrez – LF M. Pruitt – C T. Robinson – RF X. Williams – 3B T. Thomas – 1B Greene – CF Arnold – P Spears

Second inning, Scott Spears was surrounded by Critters with nobody out after walking DeWeese and allowing soft, but clear singles to Ochoa and Young. I’ve seen that before; I will probably look what the buffet has to offer. Which was probably a good choice, because I missed Danny Margolis’ 1-out, 2-run single to center that saw Danny Ochoa’s leg almost getting sheared off by Tim Robinson at home plate. Ochoa and his assorted components had to be picked out of the dirt, and the Raccoons proceeded with … Ron Richards in right… The Titans went on to make two errors in the third inning, which allowed the Coons to score three runs, including a 2-run homer by R.J. DeWeese, his ninth of the season.

With that early outburst and a 5-0 lead, Chris Munroe pitched perfectly fine – especially for a rule 5’er – through five innings, despite some slight control issues that accelerated his pitch count. He was not scored against until the sixth inning, when with two outs Williams doubled and Tom Thomas singled him in, but Munroe rebounded with a quick seventh and another scoreless inning after that before sitting down with a pitch count approaching 110. The Coons had been mostly absent offensively ever since the third inning, but the mid-to-bottom of the order should be retired by Ron Thrasher in the bottom 9th before they could pile up four runs, right? Williams popped out to left. Thomas flew out to center. Greene struck out. 5-1 Coons. Nunley 3-5; DeWeese 2-3, BB, HR, 2 RBI; Margolis 2-4, 2 RBI; Munroe 8.0 IP, 6 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 4 K, W (2-3) and 1-4, RBI;

Ron Thrasher now has consecutive outings without a walk, the first time he’s done that since April 9 and 12. His BB/9 is still in regions normally reserved for K/9 values of very good pitchers.

In addition to the buckled leg, Ochoa knocked his head against Robinson’s knee after losing his helmet turning third base, and could only flap with one arm while lying in the dirt, moaning. The Druid has his work cut out for him, while I need to find a semi-usable outfielder in our farm system, which is an even more dreadful task.

In the meantime I guess this means more starts by Ron Richards. Woe is us!

In other news

May 30 – Tijuana’s SP Troy McCaskill (6-3, 1.99 ERA) sparkles with a 2-hit shutout of the Crusaders, who get routed, 12-0.
May 30 – SFB 3B Javier Rodriguez (.315, 1 HR, 23 RBI) is going to miss at least a month with a torn quad.
May 31 – The Wolves get romped 16-4 by the Rebels, who put up two 5-run innings and have five players with a 3-hit game.
June 3 – An on-base collision leaves WAS C Jose Flores (.243, 14 HR, 40 RBI) with a herniated disc. He is out for a month.

Complaints and stuff

Matt Nunley leads the fan voting for the CL’s starter at third base in the All Star game by a considerable bunch, which is about all the good news I have.

Really. I have no mouth and I must scream.

In addition to running the most ridiculous flock of fails this town has seen in decades, we also have to read the Agitator every day, and every day there’s more grizzly details of player escapades in and around the Raccoons’ premises. For one, there’s R.J. DeWeese, who doesn’t get tired of telling everybody how much of a loser they are, and then there’s Adam Young, who tries to reel him in, but gets no respect due to his chronic failure on the field. Then there’s Tom McNeela torturing the rookies – like he’s got any reason to look down on somebody! – and overall there’s lots of little fractions that don’t trust another around their lunch box (and with box I mean a portable fridge).

Dark days ahead.

*Disclaimer: I edited that in because it fit nicely. That’s as much editing as I have ever done in this league, adjusting names (OOTP 12 could create some wicked things).

Second disclaimer: I barely made it through this week without snapping. I think a week-long break to recharge my patience could be upon us soon, because I can’t afford new furniture, which is taking a beating right now.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (24-29) vs. Crusaders (37-17) – June 6-9, 2016

All the same in the North, all the same. The Crusaders were steamrolling the competition, currently had a 5-game winning streak, and in general had the best pitching in the league while nursing a barely average offense, which if you remember was pretty much the other way around from 2015. Their rotation was tops with a 3.17 ERA, and the pen had a sublime 1.91 ERA, also leading the league. The series was tied at one this year, with one postponement.

Projected matchups:
Jonathan Toner (4-5, 2.88 ERA) vs. Doug Thompson (3-2, 3.56 ERA)
Nick Brown (5-5, 2.93 ERA) vs. Fernando Cruz (6-3, 3.03 ERA)
Hector Santos (4-3, 2.64 ERA) vs. Curtis Tobitt (5-3, 3.17 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (2-5, 4.84 ERA) vs. Jaylen Martin (5-2, 2.18 ERA)

Cruz would be a left-hander, which were somehow exceedingly rare again this season. And Thompson would be as terrible as these Crusaders starter would get.

The weather continued to have a grip on these two teams, and the Monday game was immediately rained out and postponed to Tuesday. Since the Titans played (and beat the Loggers 3-1), we had now five games less in the bank than the Titans, however this could even happen. So, double header on Tuesday! The Crusaders made a change with their rotation and brought Cruz into the first game of the double header now, but the Raccoons left Jonny Toner in the opener.

Game 1
NYC: RF Bailey – SS Paull – LF M. Ortíz – 1B Manfull – 2B Caraballo – C Lowe – 3B Rivas – CF Brissett – P F. Cruz
POR: CF Carmona – SS Jones – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – RF Sambrano – 1B Young – 2B Bergquist – C Margolis – P Toner

The Raccoons continued to reach into the bag with chips and pick out on with a middle finger printed on them. While Cookie Carmona and Matt Nunley both came in with 10-game hitting streak and extended them with a single and home run, respectively, in the bottom of the first inning, the Raccoons only got 19 pitches out of Jonny Toner before he tripped and fell on the bases in the bottom of the second and hurt himself, which was bad on a multitude of levels. The Raccoons had to get the bullpen going early and had to get seven innings from the crew, THEN play another game afterwards. The Coons would add single runs in both this and the next inning, and both came on throwing errors, first by Drew Lowe and then by Francisco Caraballo.

Juan Gallegos had always been crap, and he would not be of much help in this game. Put in to replace Toner, he managed to run up almost 50 pitches in two innings while conceding two runs thanks to running five full counts. He only got two more outs and allowed a double to Will Bailey in the fifth, which pulled up the big left-handed bats as the tying run in the inning. Beaver had to deal with that, got a grounder from Martin Ortíz, and then got six outs from the next six batters while Jason Bergquist hit a 2-run homer for some cushion in the bottom 5th, extending the lead to 6-2. He was also extremely efficient. When Bailey grounded out to Bergquist to start the eighth inning, Beaver had collected eight outs with 20 pitches, compared to the 58 that it took Gallegos for the same number of outs. He was so good in this outing, we even let him bat twice, which included him getting Danny Margolis killed at third base for the second out in the bottom 8th due to a bunt that was less bunt and more chop. He remained efficient on the mound until the very last batter, with Drew Lowe sending Cookie all the way to the track in deep center, but there his extra-base hit went to die in Carmona’s glove. 6-2 Raccoons. Carmona 2-5; DeWeese 2-4, 2B; Sambrano 0-1, 3 BB; Margolis 2-4, 2B; Toner 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 0 K; Beaver 4.1 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 1 K, SV (1);

Lost somewhere in the misery of losing Jonny Toner was the fact that the Raccoons hit into three double plays and did everything in their power to not run up the score.

If Toner is lost for the season for any reason, the Raccoons will be quite definitely ****ed. I mean, they’re probably ****ed anyway, but that would be the golden spike.

I think the best news after this game is that we still have five relievers available for Brownie. – Wait, Slappy, what? – He feels he pulled a hammy tying his shoes? – WHAT?? NO!! – Why are you giggling??

Game 2
NYC: 3B Salinas – 2B Caraballo – LF M. Ortíz – 1B Manfull – RF Bailey – SS Paull – C Durango – CF Brissett – P D. Thompson
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Sambrano – SS McKnight – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – RF Richards – 3B Walter – C McNeela – P Brown

The Coons scored another run after a Crusaders error, when Cookie hit a leadoff single in the bottom 1st (12-game hitting streak), and not only swiped second, but also took third on Eduardo Durango’s throw to centerfield, which was followed by a deep fly to center by Sambrano, deep enough to tag and come home. The Crusaders immediately threatened in the top 2nd by loading the bases on a bloop single for Bailey, a double to deep left by Eric Paull, and then Brownie lost Durango to a 1-out walk. Bases loaded, Amari Brissett struck out, and Doug Thompson popped out to Sambrano. The lower middle part of their order created more trouble in the fourth, when B.J. Manfull walked and Paull singled, but this time a full count saw Durango strike out and Brissett pop out to left to end the inning with the tying run on third base. After the Coons scored another run in the bottom 5th, Richards coming home on a McNeela sac fly, Brownie struggled some more in the sixth and again loaded the bases, including two walks. This pulled up Doug Thompson’s spot with two outs – and the Crusaders did not hit for him! He grounded out right to McKnight, who sure-handedly ended the inning. That was about it for Nick Brown, who had needed 105 pitches for six innings tedious innings of shutout ball.

Seung-mo Chun opened the seventh with a walk to Miguel Salinas, who was not much of a runner, but the tying run came up again. Caraballo lined out softly to Bergquist, who had entered at second base with Sandy moving to first base before the inning to get us in a position to run out Manobu Sugano for six batters starting with Ortíz. These six contained only one right-handed bat (Paull), so I figured we might be okay, but Ortíz crushed the first pitch he got to deep right to flatten the score at two, his 14th homer of the season. It would be Bergquist to restore the Coons’ (though not Brownie’s…) lead in the bottom of the inning. Ron Richards was on second base with one out when Bergquist batted with two outs and rammed a ball past a diving Salinas into the leftfield corner. Richards scored on the double, and Carmona hit another double on the spot to restore the old gap, 4-2, but Sugano wouldn’t miss a chance to disappoint and drilled Eric Paull to start the top 8th. He got Durango with a pop and Brissett with a K, but with right-handed veteran Jim Brulhart pinch-hitting for Thompson, we went on to Chris Mathis, hoping for four quick outs from him. Brulhart struck out, Ron Richards added an insurance run with a 1-out RBI single in the bottom 8th, and Mathis struck out Ortíz on four pitches to end the game without allowing a runner. 5-2 Coons. Carmona 3-4, 2B, RBI; Jones 1-1; Richards 2-4, RBI; Walter 2-4; Bergquist 1-1, 2B, RBI; Brown 6.0 IP, 5 H, 0 R, 4 BB, 4 K; Mathis 1.1 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K, SV (2);

Jonny Toner had to wait in line on a stretcher; overnight, Ivan Mena first finished up on Danny Ochoa, who had suffered a strained hip muscle and was going to miss at least six more weeks. That of course meant a trip to the DL and left the Critters with three outfielders plus magic shapeshifter Sandy Sambrano. So Matt Stubbs was back, hooray, hooray.

Game 3
NYC: RF Bailey – SS Paull – LF M. Ortíz – 1B Manfull – C Lowe – 3B Rivas – 2B J. Ortega – CF Brissett – P Tobitt
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – RF Richards – 2B Jones – C McNeela – P Santos

Curtis Tobitt looked staggeringly hittable early on in the game, surrendering four hits and a walk to the Coons in the first inning. Cookie opened with a single, stole second base, and was driven in by DeWeese with two outs. Young, Richards, and Jones also reached base, with Richards plating DeWeese for an early 2-0 lead – while dark clouds were hovering over the park once more. Summer in Oregon! You really have to try to enjoy it!

While Cookie already had his hitting streak extended to 13, Nunley had to wait until the bottom 2nd to get to 12 games. He had McKnight on first base with two outs and lined to the right side. Jorge Ortega jumped and swiped, knocked it down, but couldn’t play it in time to beat Nunley at first base, leaving him with an infield single. Then the Crusaders suffered a blow. When the bottom of the third inning dawned, Tobitt was nowhere to be seen, having departed with an ailment of some sort. Colin Sabatino took over, did the third inning okay, but allowed a 1-out single to Santos in the fourth and was then taken deep to right by Cookie, running the score to 4-0. Top 5th, Santos was a bit in a spot of bother, having put two on with two outs for the second straight inning, and now had to face Ortíz. While Adam Young was the biggest offensive disappointment at first base since – well – Stan Murphy, he had reactions and swiped a satanic quick bouncer that tried to escape over the first base bag and ended the inning, depriving Ortíz of at least one RBI. You go, Adam! If you don’t have any RBI, nobody shall have some!

Like Brownie in Tuesday’s nightcap, Santos was suffering from a high pitch count by the middle innings, though he made it through six on 87 pitches only. Considering his lower count where he would losing it (100, more or less), our pen was one full count away from having to find three innings again, but then Santos retired Brissett and Brulhart on two pitches to start the top of the seventh and continued to retire Bailey in the seventh and Paull to start the eighth before Ron Thrasher got the assignment with three lefties in the middle of the order. He walked Ortíz, but got the other two to complete eight. The bottom 8th saw a 40-year old Charlie Deacon in his second inning. Ron Richards singled, with Shane Walter hitting for Howard Jones to continue the long line of left-handers Deacon had to see (in fact, with Thrasher pitching, the ENTIRE lineup was left-handed now!). Walter bombarded Deacon’s first pitch to right center for a no-doubt outta-here 2-run homer, which put this game away for good. Another run would score on McNeela singling, moving up on Stubbs’ groundout, and scoring on Cookie’s single to right. John Korb went on to complete the team shutout with a perfect ninth. 7-0 Furballs! Carmona 3-5, HR, 3 RBI; Richards 2-4, RBI; Walter (PH) 1-1, HR, 2 RBI; Santos 7.1 IP, 6 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 5 K, W (5-3) and 1-3;

You gonna sweep them now?? After all the previous misery? Something’s fishy here!

Also still fishy was Toner’s condition, but the Crusaders broke their bad news right on Thursday before the game. Curtis Tobitt (5-4, 3.32ERA), 36-year old ace and so far considered a sure first-ballot Hall of Famer, had to undergo Tommy John surgery to fix a torn ulnar collateral ligament.

We would run out another almost entirely left-handed lineup (with Sandy being a switch-hitter) on Thursday in the fourth game of the set. We might get two southpaws on the weekend, so we can do some switcheroo then.

Game 4
NYC: RF Bailey – SS Paull – LF M. Ortíz – 1B Manfull – 2B Caraballo – C Lowe – 3B Rivas – CF Brissett – P J. Martin
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – RF Richards – 2B Sambrano – C McNeela – P Abe

The sweep went out of the window just like our starting pitching not having allowed a run in the series, right in the first inning, when Tadasu Abe allowed five runs, starting the inning with three full counts that ended up putting Bailey on with a walk and Ortíz with a single, then had two more hard singles lined to the outfield before Drew Lowe took him deep to left. Another run scored in the second inning, but if Abe thought he could get out early to watch Pukemon on TV, he erred capitally. Our pen had thrown 11.2 innings in the last two days, and he was in this one for 100 pitches now that he had already soiled it. If he concedes 13 runs, so be it.

While it took Oberst von Lindenthal a few trips out to the mound, once even threatening Abe with a combat knife, increasingly furious that Abe’s interpreter didn’t seem to translate all of his profanity-laden tirades, somehow Abe managed to make it through six innings without any more runs scored. He finished with a K to Bailey, his seventh on the day, but that paled compared to nine hits and six runs. The Coons still had not made it onto the board, with their best chance being DeWeese and Young hitting singles off “Midnight” Martin to start the bottom 4th, but then Richards hit into a double play. The Crusaders took the pitching change as an opportunity to reload, and Manfull hit a 2-run homer off Chun in the seventh. The Raccoons were left shut out by Martin through eight innings, getting only seven scattered singles. When Shane Walter hit a 1-out single in the bottom 9th, the Crusaders felt threatened enough to send Alex Ramirez, a right-handed reliever. Bergquist got a pinch-hit single off him, but second base remained a major obstacle for the Raccoons, and McNeela and Stubbs flew out to end the game. 8-0 Crusaders. Walter (PH) 1-1; Bergquist (PH) 1-1;

Well, a sweep would have been too good. We don’t deserve that.

Whether we deserved Jonny Toner being diagnosed with plantar fascitis and being thought to miss six weeks by the Druid is an entirely different thing.

Raccoons (27-30) vs. Scorpions (23-37) – June 10-12, 2016

While the Scorpions had rallied from their .250 start to the season, not winning their tenth game until May 15, they had recovered a bit now, having managed to tie the perennially hopeless Wolves for the worst record in baseball. But they had won four games in a row (we have already solved one of those this week), while ranking in the bottom four in both runs allowed and runs scored in the FL. We had won the last three contests against them, including a 2-1 series win last year.

Projected matchups:
Chris Munroe (2-3, 3.21 ERA) vs. Manuel Ortíz (1-4, 5.26 ERA)
John Korb (0-0, 1.47 ERA) vs. Albert Lorusso (4-4, 3.97 ERA)
Nick Brown (5-5, 2.73 ERA) vs. William Kay (3-7, 4.10 ERA)

I thought they might skip Ortíz on their off day (Thursday), but he is announced for the series opener, which means that we might only see one southpaw, which is Lorusso on Saturday. We also won’t see Noah “Bloody” Bricker, who is 4-6, with a 3.67 ERA, and many moons ago was high on our draft list. If we had sucked one year longer, we would have had a great draft pick in 2008 and he could have been ours. Instead, we drafted Jason Seeley, who is slightly better than average for the Cyclones this year, and still is a career .698 OPS batter. Bricker: 49-40, 3.73 ERA. His main issue is a weak third pitch and he runs into trouble the third time through the order.

So we had to find a pitcher for Saturday. One option on the roster would be John Korb, who had 27 career starts, which had gone badly (7.10 ERA in 17 starts in ’14), but this was an emergency and a longer-term solution could still be implemented for later. There were two factors in favor of Korb. First, we would have Thursday off next week, allowing us to skip the open spot and not needing a real fifth starter until the 21st. Second, there was nobody in AAA exactly begging for a promotion. With Korb starting, we could add a reliever, and selected 23-year old right-hander Will West, who was the closer for the Alley Cats and 1-2 with a 2.28 ERA and 16 SV in the current season after being smacked around for a 6.26 ERA in 2015. He ain’t special: fastball at 92, slider, so-so control. The package was however good enough to merit protection prior to last December’s rule 5 draft, so it’s time to see those $162k minimum salary in action. Whether he remains up here until we need the fifth starter 11 days from now or whether he goes down again afterwards has yet to be decided.

Korb has come quite far from the standing he had in April. If Lou Cannon had signed with us in the first week of the season, Korb would have been DFA’ed.

Game 1
SAC: 3B LaCombe – RF P. Sanchez – CF Meade – LF Tovar – 1B T. Ramos – C J. Young – SS Sauceda – 2B Arias – P M. Ortíz
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B A. Young – RF Richards – 2B Sambrano – C McNeela – P Munroe

The Scorpions were in business early with a walk to Jason LaCombe to open the game. He scored on Pablo Sanchez’ triple to right, but Sanchez also tweaked something and had to be removed in favor of Jaime Garcia, who would score on a groundout. Ortíz would retire the first six Coons before Sandy Sambrano tripled. He scored on McNeela’s sac fly to get the team back to within a run, but overall the hitting display was one of shambles again. Bottom 4th, they had two on with one out for Young and Richards, the vomit-inducing non-sluggers, who managed a pair of groundouts to Alex Arias, and no runs. While Munroe kept lingering and navigated around the runners he repeatedly generated, the Raccoons had another chance in the bottom of the sixth. McKnight reached with a 1-out bloop single, Nunley walked. DeWeese flew out to center, but Ortíz also walked Young, which pulled up… Richards. And he flew out easily to right. Munroe was done after seven and still held the short stick. Sandy drew a leadoff walk in the seventh, but was caught stealing. McNeela then hit a fly to left that dipped just in front of Jorge Tovar for a 1-out single. Shane Walter hit for Munroe, drove a ball to left and past Garcia, and that one was in and would hurt. Walter held at second base, while McNeela scored to tie the game (and we could lead now if …). The top of the order came up, with neither Cookie nor Nunley having gotten a hit so far to extend their streaks. The Scorpions treacherously and intentionally walked Cookie before McKnight and Nunley both struck out. And if the Raccoons could hold on the 3-2 lead that they got when R.J. DeWeese whacked a leadoff jack off Ortíz in the bottom 8th, both streaks would be history. This would be a tense one. Of course the Coons didn’t do anything to add to their newly-found lead, and the top 9th started with Sugano still in from the eighth and facing Tony Ramos, a left-handed former Titan who rammed a pitch to deep left, but just at the extreme edge of DeWeese’s range, and he made the catch on the track before bouncing off the fence. Mathis then took over, allowing a single to Joe Young (who thus won the Young Derby for most hits in the game with one) before getting the last two outs against Gabriel Sauceda and Alex Arias. 3-2 Critters. Walter (PH) 1-1, 2B, RBI; Munroe 7.0 IP, 5 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 3 BB, 6 K;

Game 2
SAC: 3B LaCombe – RF P. Sanchez – CF Meade – LF Tovar – 1B T. Ramos – C J. Young – SS Sauceda – 2B Arias – P Lorusso
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Bergquist – SS McKnight – LF DeWeese – 1B Jones – 3B Walter – RF Stubbs – C Margolis – P Korb

Korb’s start soon turned into a crowded mess with two Scorpions reaching in the first inning, and in the second inning they even had the bases loaded with no outs. They had the misfortune to bring up their pitcher, but Lorusso scored a run with a fielder’s choice at second base. After that, Korb struck out an over-eager Jason LaCombe before Sanchez, who was not seriously ailing, grounded out to Jones at first base. Ray Meade hit a leadoff jack in the top of the third to give the Scorpions a 2-0 lead, but by the end of the third inning the Raccoons were on top, 3-2. Margolis hit a home run, and then Cookie was scraped by a pitch, scored on McKnight’s double, and DeWeese singled to center just past the reach of Arias to get McKnight home. While getting the Critters going in the third, Margolis killed their effort in the fourth, hitting into a double play with Walter (single) and Stubbs (walk) on base. Korb grounded out to end the inning.

Korb made it through five with a lead, which was already a mild and unexpected success. The bottom 5th then saw Cookie and Bergquist reach the corners with a pair of singles and nobody out. Bergquist even stole second base on the second pitch to McKnight, who hit a sac fly, 4-2 the new score, after which DeWeese grounded out. Jones was walked intentionally, while Walter walked unintentionally to load the bases with two outs for Stubbs. The kiddo was hitting .133 in 15 AB and was probably not going to get it done. The alternatives were Sandy (who was struggling) and Richards (who was Richards). Ah, let the kiddo hit. Stranger things have happened. I would be happy with one run. Stubbs hit the first pitch to right center, but no problem for Sanchez. Urghs. Korb then was removed after a 1-out walk to Joe Young in the sixth. Chun was no help, allowing a double to Sauceda and a sac fly to Arias, which got the Scorpions back to 4-3. With switch-hitter Jaime Garcia batting for Lorusso, Ron Thrasher was thrown into the fray since we could afford the odd walk. Indeed he ran a full count before allowing a rocket to left, but it was hanging up and allowed DeWeese to catch the liner before it could dip onto the grass and tie the game. Inning over, bullet dodged. Nunley had entered in a double switch with Thrasher (replacing Walter and batting ninth) and hit a 1-out single in the bottom 6th. Cookie also singled, but Bergquist and McKnight flew out to no effect. Top 7th, Thrasher walked LaCombe to get going, then pounced on a bad bunt by Sanchez to get LaCombe at second. When Sanchez took off to steal second, Margolis threw him out! Ray Meade would ground out to Nunley to end the seventh, and Sugano and Mathis then tip-toed around a leadoff single by Jorge Tovar in the eighth, nursing the sickly lead to the ninth, in which Arias promptly hit a leadoff single off Mathis. And he was fast with five steals on the year, while batting a meager .220. With left-hander Xavier Alvarez batting for the pitcher now, we brought our last left-hander (LaCombe and Sanchez were also left-handed batters) in Kevin Beaver. Alvarez bounced the second pitch to Bergquist for a double play before LaCombe struck out. 4-3 Raccoons! Carmona 2-3;

That squeezing noise you can hear is the Raccoons having won five of six so far this week while batting scarcely the weight of a full-sized fridge invader.

Game 3
SAC: 3B LaCombe – CF Meade – SS Sauceda – RF P. Sanchez – C J. Young – 1B T. Ramos – LF J. Garcia – 2B Arias – P Kay
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B A. Young – RF Sambrano – C McNeela – 2B Bergquist – P Brown

Oberst von Lindenthal was in action again in the first inning. Once Brownie had put on Joe Young with four pitches, which filled the bags on three walks with two outs, he dashed out there on his trusted battle horse “Richard III” to show Brown a rough sketch of the strike zone. Brown, annoyed, got a bouncer from Tony Ramos that he converted for the third out, which at that point was good enough, even though 24 pitches, most of them astray, for an opening inning weren’t. Brown found himself batting with the bases loaded and two outs in the bottom 2nd, a situation that only arose when William Kay threw a wild pitch to Bergquist with DeWeese and McNeela on base. The runners moved to scoring position and Bergquist was walked intentionally, but Brownie’s fly up the rightfield line had lots of hang time and was caught by Sanchez with ease. Bottom 3rd, McKnight and Nunley were on with one out. DeWeese struck out and Young found his new friend Arias again with another grounder.

What a sad game! Nick Brown had NOTHING, and I saw a boy about 13 up the leftfield line with a Brown jersey and the #10 painted on both cheeks that was in tears and seeing the still slightly smoldering remains of his hero, while the Coons missed all their chances. The fifth inning saw Brownie lose LaCombe to a single with one out. While not inherently an issue, he then threw two wild pitches Ray Meade to get him to third base. Meade would end up walking and moved up on a groundout that kept LaCombe pinned for odd reasons before Pablo Sanchez waved over the same way too low pitch three times to end the inning. Nick Brown managed to go six scoreless innings again, although nobody could quite fathom how he had made it around three hits and five walks. This time there was no lead to blow, since the game remained scoreless at the conclusion of six innings. After crowding Kay early on, the Coons did nothing in the middle innings. In the bottom 7th, Sandy Sambrano somehow got to second base before Bergquist and ****ing Ron Richards popped out to end the inning.

Will West made his major league debut in the eighth inning of a scoreless game. The bullpen had suffered some this week, and there was no way around him in this undesirable spot … AND facing the middle of the order, but Sauceda grounded out, Sanchez flew out to left, and Young struck out to give him a reason to smile. The ninth had Kevin Beaver, who put Arias on Jaime Garcia with a walk, although Arias forced him. Stan Whitley’s pinch-hit single brought up LaCombe with two outs, and he unleashed a 3-1 rocket to center. Cookie didn’t get it and played it on the second hop. Arias turned third and made for home, where McKnight’s relay was perfectly placed for McNeela to tag him out and end the inning. Bottom 9th, DeWeese led off with a single to left. Young grounded out to Arias for the 29th time in the series, but DeWeese was left alive at second base after taking an early start. Jose Ramos then was ordered to walk Sandy intentionally, pulling up McNeela, still batting .296 somehow. He grounded up the middle, but into the range of Sauceda, who – LOST THE BALL AS HE WENT TO LOB IT TO ARIAS!! Error on the Scorpion, bases loaded with one out for …? Shane Walter grabbed a bat. Ramos fell to 2-0 before Walter flew to shallow right, but no problem for Sanchez. Howard Jones hit for Beaver and popped out to Arias. Extra innings, and I was banging my head against the window ferociously.

Thrasher was in for the 10th, walked a guy, because that was what he did in 2016, and allowed a single to Joe Young (not that the other Young COULD EVER PULL HIS ****ING STICK OUT OF HIS ****ING ARSE) to put them on the corners with two outs for PH Jorge Tovar, who grounded out to Walter, who had remained at second base. No runs still, and the bottom 10th saw Ramos having another go at the Coons with Cookie leading off. He glared at a ball off the corner that was called a strike, then chipped a ball foul. The third pitch was to his liking and he put the wood on it. HOLY TRINITY!! THAT SOUND! THAT DRIVE! THAT BALL … IS … GOOOOOOOONNNNNE!!!!! 1-0 Cookies!!! Carmona 1-5, HR, RBI; DeWeese 2-4;

In other news

June 6 – The Thunder hold an 8-1 lead in the fifth inning against the Falcons, but go on to lose, 9-8.
June 7 – The Pacifics romp the Stars, 13-3, with all the runs concentrated into three half innings. The Stars score theirs in the bottom 7th, while the Pacifics put up seven in the top 3rd and six in the top 5th.
June 7 – Canadiens and Indians combine for 28 hits, but it takes them 15 innings to decide on the Canadiens as 4-3 winners of the game.
June 8 – It’s season over for Titans rookie SP Eric Rasmussen (1-3, 6.57 ERA), who has to have surgery to remove bone spurs from his elbow.
June 9 – The Capitals commit four errors in their 3-2 walkoff defeat to the Miners, including one by Nelson Chavez to get the Miners rolling in the bottom of the ninth.

Complaints and stuff

We lose our overall best player and the team suddenly takes off? Well, it’s not the first meltdown the Crusaders have suffered against Coon City in recent years, but it certainly came unexpected, and the three wins against Sacramento were all by a single run and in some cases smelled enough like glue for Chad to take off the head of the costume to sniff at a player twice on Sunday.

So yeah, Jonny’s down, but he was not the only top 10-or-so pitcher in the ABL to go down this week. Boy, Curtis Tobitt might be on the Crusaders and all, but he was in the division for so long that he’s almost like family despite never donning the coonskin cap. Him undergoing Tommy John and probably not returning as the old Tobitt is a hard one to see. He has 2,494 strikeouts and a career 2.78 ERA. The fact that he only has 184 wins (against 88 losses) has to do with the hard-to-watch Indians teams he spent most of his career with. He was 77 games over .500 with the Indians, however, with the 2003-12 Indians overall compiling merely a +40 record, being starved for offense for the last few years of that decade (remember the awesome trifecta of Ron Alston, Jose Paraz, and David Lopez, plus supporting cast they had in the early-to-mid 2000s.

[Westheim]

It’s Draft Week! The Rule 4 Draft will take place on Wednesday, after the conclusion of our series with the Rebels, who are leading the FL East.

Raccoons (30-30) @ Rebels (35-27) – June 13-15, 2016

How difficult our relation with the Rebels had been for the longest time illustrated the fact that we had won the last five interleague sets against them, including two sweeps, and not only were we still under .500 against them all-time, no, they were also the ABL team we had the worst record against. The golden banana of spanking the Raccoons would go to over to the Warriors if we could take a sixth series in a row from them.

The Rebels were mostly doing their damage on offense, ranking second in runs scored in the FL, while they sat only fifth in runs allowed. The rotation was decent, but the bullpen had some holes with a 4.30 ERA.

They had also completed a deal with the Canadiens just before the series, acquiring left-handed starting pitcher Dave Butler (4-5, 3.24 ERA) from them for the former Elks OF Ross Holland (.246, 1 HR, 16 RBI) and #41 prospect SP Alex Vallejo.

Projected matchups:
Hector Santos (5-3, 2.39 ERA) vs. Mike Brugh (7-2, 2.82 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (2-6, 5.21 ERA) vs. Dave Butler (4-5, 3.24 ERA)
Chris Munroe (2-3, 3.13 ERA) vs. Josh Knupp (5-6, 4.93 ERA)

And we will get to see Butler immediately, how lovely. He’s the only left-hander tentatively in this set.

Game 1
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – RF Richards – 2B Jones – C McNeela – P Santos
RIC: CF D. Flores – 1B A. Rodriguez – RF Kimura – C J. White – LF Reya – SS Morbidelli – 2B Cramer – 3B Hart – P Brugh

Neither team had a hit through three innings. Santos was perfect on four strikeouts, while Brugh had walked a pair in the first, but the Raccoons had been too polite to exploit the opportunity. Ron Richards would be the first batter to drop in a base knock, beating Alberto Rodriguez with a bouncer to right. That came with Adam Young on first after a walk, yet two outs, and nothing good happened with Jones batting. The fifth inning saw some motion with two outs as Cookie reached on an infield single, McKnight singled, and then Nunley reached on an error, all with two outs again. DeWeese fell to 0-2, which usually meant death to offense, but then landed a solid base hit to right for a 2-run single, the first tally in the game. Young grounded out, of course. Santos continued to deny the Rebels any base runners the second time through the order, but his pitch count was already at 73, which was not outright outlandish, but his limit were a hundred more or less…

The top 7th not only saw Simon Morbidelli hurting himself on a throw, but also a third run scoring for the Critters as Cookie singled, stole, and scored on McKnight’s single. Santos found two outs in four pitches in the bottom of the inning, but then had to look at Tamio Kimura hitting a ball precisely into the gap in left center and that was just in and there was nothing anybody could do about it. Kimura had a double, the Rebels crowd exhaled, some even stood up and applauded, appreciating Santos’ effort, which ended after the inning as he was hit for in the top of the eighth, though Margolis flew out to left against left-hander Iemitsu Rin, ending the inning with a man on base. Mathis appeared in the eighth, which opened an opportunity for David Gonzalez, Morbidelli’s replacement at short, to hit a solo homer to dead center, which was 427’ in Richmond. Manobu Sugano however would end the game with a perfect ninth, including two strikeouts. 3-1 Raccoons. Carmona 2-5; McKnight 2-4, BB, RBI; Santos 7.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 6 K, W (6-3);

Winning record!

After the game I was approached by an older gentleman with a white cowboy hat and an even whiter beard, who gave me his card, which identified him as Richard “Big Daddy” Barbour, and showed me an envelope with a pack of $100 bills and wanted to know whether Santos had any family and if I intended to sell that, too. I raised an eyebrow before shooing Santos, Thrasher, and Cookie into the bus back to the hotel…

Strange people wherever we go this year…

Game 2
POR: CF Carmona – SS Jones – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Sambrano – 2B Bergquist – C Margolis – RF Stubbs – P Abe
RIC: CF D. Flores – 1B A. Rodriguez – C J. White – LF Reya – 3B B. Harris – RF Locke – 2B Da Silva – SS Hart – P D. Butler

This game also remained scoreless for a long time, and the Raccoons defense deserved the most credit for that. The Rebels had a man on base with no outs or one out in each of the first three innings, hit balls hard and got nothing. Cookie made two great plays in center, and Bergquist turned a wonderful double play to keep the Rebels off the board. The Coons however were dazzled by Butler, who in his Rebels debut allowed a double to Howard Jones in the first inning, wiped that one off, and then started to cruise. Through six innings, the Coons were still looking for another baserunner, while Danny Flores, an awesome centerfielder with a bit less of a bat and a bit more of a glove than Cookie, hit a ball to deep left in the bottom 6th that looked like at least a double, but somehow DeWeese got there and made the catch at the track. At the plate, DeWeese would do nothing but strike out; in the first, in the fourth, and also in the seventh, always ending another sad inning. Abe finally buckled in the bottom 7th, which saw Jamal White hit a leadoff double and then a Luis Reya single. Reya was batting a substantial (over 200 AB) .333 at the start of the series, but had gone dry on Monday. This was his first hit in the set. Ron Thrasher appeared with runners on the corners, but only ****ed up the game for good, allowing three straight hits to score three runs for the Rebels. Will West replaced him after that, walked Bo Hart, who was doubled off first when Butler lined out to Sandy Sambrano, which were the first outs in the game after six straight Rebels had reached base. Flores would single in the two runners still on base before Rodriguez flew out to DeWeese. The Coons were completely blown out with that crooked number on the board, and only managed one more hit against Dave Butler, who threw them a 2-hit shutout. 5-0 Rebels. Walter (PH) 1-1;

Well, no winning record any more.

Also no strange offers to buy any players of color after this one…

Game 3
POR: CF Carmona – SS Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – RF Richards – 2B Jones – C McNeela – P Munroe
RIC: 3B B. Harris – 1B A. Rodriguez – RF Kimura – LF Reya – 2B Cramer – CF Correa – C R. Lewis – SS Hart – P Knupp

The K was silent in Knupp’s name, though you wouldn’t have guessed it from seeing him whiff six Coons in four innings against just one hit (a DeWeese double). Munroe bled two runs early by allowing Justin Cramer on base in the bottom 2nd, then fell to a Jon Correa triple. We did not walk Bo Hart intentionally with two outs, and he promptly singled to run the score to 2-0. Hart was up again with two outs and two on (both having walked) in the bottom 4th, but then flew out to Ron Richards.

The visitors would suddenly be in business in the fifth inning. McNeela led off with a home run (his second career homer at age 28), and then Munroe beat Hart at short for a single. Cookie walked, representing a readily scoreable go-ahead run. However, after Walter flew out, Nunley got Carmona taken out with a grounder to Hart. While DeWeese walked to fill the bases with two outs, that put Nunley at second, and he could not score on Young’s single to center, which thus only tied the game, and left it tied when Richards silently K’ed. Singles by Munroe and Cookie with two outs in the sixth removed knocked out Knupp, but Adonis Foster (who could have been a Raccoon now*) got Shane Walter to ground out. In return, Munroe walked Kimura to start the bottom 6th, Reya singled, and with runners on the corners Munroe would get two pops for outs before Russell Lewis singled to score Kimura, Lewis’ first hit of the season.

The Raccoons would get the tying run on base with Dan Nordahl – still alive! – issuing a leadoff walk to Jones in the eighth. Margolis hit for McNeela with Rin approaching again, but hit into a double play, after which Sandy Sambrano actually reached first base and stole second, but Cookie struck out now and ended another inning with another runner in scoring position. Unremarkable ex-Coon Ray Kelley pitched a perfect ninth. 3-2 Rebels.

Raccoons (31-32) @ Loggers (30-36) – June 17-19, 2016

Four games into the season series, we were tied 2-2 with the Loggers, who were only one game removed from bringing up the rear in the CL North. The Loggers’ issue was pitching, of which they had none, reflected in their CL rank of dead-last when it came to runs allowed. Conceding 5.2 runs per game was probably not worthy of even a D-, and they had to work on that. Their offense was third in runs scored, but it was just not enough.

Projected matchups:
Nick Brown (5-5, 2.56 ERA) vs. Kurt Doyle (4-4, 5.40 ERA)
Hector Santos (6-3, 2.20 ERA) vs. Joey Van Buskirk (1-2, 3.86 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (2-7, 5.03 ERA) vs. Brian Cope (7-2, 3.06 ERA)

That’s three right-handers, as we are going to miss their only left-hander by a day.

Alonso Baca started a rehab assignment this weekend and could be back as early as Tuesday or Wednesday. The question was whom to demote. McNeela had an appealing average, but dumping Margolis would leave us with two left-handed batting catchers, and the lineup was distorted enough as it was.

Game 1
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – SS McKnight – 1B Young – RF Richards – C McNeela – P Brown
MIL: RF Hodgers – SS Howell – 1B M. Rucker – LF LeMoine – C Delgado – CF Cooper – 2B O. Sandoval – 3B I. Reed – P Doyle

The Coons jumped into the lead in the top of the first when Shane Walter lifted a ball outta right center, 1-0. It could have been 2-0, but Cookie’s blooper to shallow left was *just* caught by Chris LeMoine, who would later be the first Logger to hit a ball really hard off Brownie. By then Portland’s favorite son-in-law had arrived at two outs in the fourth with only two hits allowed, both soft singles. LeMoine drilled a ball to center, where Cookie laid out and caught it to end the inning. The Raccoons had had a pair on base with two outs in the third, but DeWeese’s liner to right had been caught by a leaping Oscar Sandoval to kill that opportunity. The Coons continued to be a mere nuisance with the bat – for their own fans, not those of the opposing team – and at some point a 38-year old guy that was clinging on to the last shades of his former staff had to give up a run. A leadoff walk to Tony Delgado wound up doing Brown in. By the time the Loggers tied the game in that bottom of the fifth, Andrew Cooper had replaced Delgado on the bases after a bad bunt, but was on second with Isiah Reed batting. Reed was a left-hander and the Critters fell into the trap of considering Brownie able to kill any batter, and even more so a left-hander. He couldn’t, Reed lined up the rightfield line, and Cooper scored, 1-1.

Brown also couldn’t get the heart of the Loggers’ order out in the bottom 6th. Mike Rucker walked and LeMoine singled with two outs before Delgado flew out to Cookie on a 3-1 pitch. The Coons would get Richards on with an infield single (happiness flushed through us…) in the top 7th, and McNeela also singled, bringing up Brown with one out. Hoping for good stuff, we let him hit, and he cracked a hard bouncer to the right side, but right into Rucker, who easily put him out. Cookie grounded to third, and Reed killed him as well, ending the inning with runners on second and third… The Loggers had righty Dave Walk (7.50 ERA) in the game by the eighth, trying to contain an entirely left-handed lineup. Walter hit a leadoff double to right, but when Nunley also hit one in that direction, Victor Hodgers made the play. DeWeese was not pitched to, but McKnight was, and bounced a ball to Rob Howell, who sailed his feed to Sandoval, and the Loggers got nobody, which put up Adam Young with three on and one out. Walk was probably not the right guy for this spot, but the Loggers stubbornly stuck to him anyway, which was precisely how last-place teams were made. Young FINALLY was useful, and hit a 2-0 pitch into the deep right corner, scoring two runs. Richards was walked intentionally (yes, actually!), McNeela struck out, but Sandy Sambrano beat Hodgers for a bases-clearing triple, which finally was enough damage on Walk to end his pains. Toby Wood replaced him, allowed an RBI single to Cookie, but then finally ended the inning against Walter. Kevin Beaver got the ball in the bottom 8th. Hodgers hit an infield single, advanced on an errant throw by McNeela and a passed ball, before Beaver drilled Rucker. This looked a lot like misery in the making, but LeMoine grounded to McKnight for the second out on Rucker while Hodgers scored, and after that Seung-mo Chun replaced Beaver and got the last four outs without blowing the game. 7-2 Brownies! Walter 2-4, BB, HR, 2B, RBI; Young 2-4, 2B, 2 RBI; Sambrano (PH) 1-1, 3B, 3 RBI; Brown 7.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 3 K, W (6-5);

Game 2
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – SS McKnight – RF Sambrano – C McNeela – P Santos
MIL: RF Hodgers – SS Howell – LF LeMoine – 1B M. Rucker – 2B Enriquez – 3B I. Reed – C Delgado – CF Cooper – P Van Buskirk

DeWeese’s double, McKnight getting plunked, and a 4-pitch walk to Sandy loaded the bases with one out in the second inning for McNeela, who grounded to Victor Enriquez, who in turn became the second Loggers infielder in the series to miss his double play partner with a lobbed throw. Howell couldn’t come up with the ball, the first run was in, and the bases loaded for Santos, a dangerous .063 batter. A wild pitch by Van Buskirk plated the second run before Santos struck out, but Cookie brought in another run with a 2-out infield single, giving Santos a 3-0 lead. While that was already a wicked way to fall behind from the Loggers’ perspective, it got worse in the fourth inning. Sandy reached base with a leadoff walk and stole second base because Delgado couldn’t get a grip on the ball. McNeela singled through Rucker to score Sandy from second, 4-0, and Santos bunted McNeela over. Cookie hit his second infield single on the day, and Walter singled to center to score McNeela. Nunley then grounded to Enriquez, who also had to grab twice and thus failed to get any out on the next infield single, which loaded the bases for DeWeese. Mentally, Van Buskirk was dismembered already. He failed to throw a strike to DeWeese, which forced a run home on the 4-pitch walk, 6-0. That was it. The Loggers replaced him with Tom Nelson, a right-hander with good stuff, but ill control, who conceded single runs on Young’s single to center and McKnight’s sac fly to left, then walked Sambrano to restock the bags. McNeela hit a ball to deep left, where LeMoine totally sold out to keep the Coons from taking a double-digit lead, 8-0 in the middle of the fourth, with Santos being good, but not great, having allowed a few hard flies already. The Loggers would get onto the board in the bottom 5th in ironic fashion (this entire game was a mild joke, or an insult if you were a baseball purist) with the reliever Nelson doubling off Santos, who then dropped a feed from Young at first base to add Hodgers to the mix. One out, Howell singled to right center, which scored Nelson, but Hodgers was thrown out by Sandy at third base, helping Santos to end the inning quicker. That unearned run was all the damage the Loggers did to Santos, who went seven and a third, retiring with 92 pitches after Rob Howell had flown out to deep center, roamed by Cookie. The pen created an instant mess when Sugano walked the entire middle of the order and didn’t retire anybody. Mathis replaced him to face Isiah Reed, threw one pitch that was grounded to Bergquist at second base and converted into a double play to end the inning. McKnight countered with a solo shot in the ninth inning that was the final scribble to this day’s box score. 9-1 Raccoons! Carmona 3-4, BB, RBI; Stubbs (PH) 1-1; Young 2-5, RBI; Sambrano 0-1, 4 BB; Santos 7.1 IP, 6 H, 1 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 5 K, W (7-3); Mathis 0.2 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 0 K;

Game 3
POR: CF Carmona – RF Sambrano – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – SS McKnight – 2B Jones – C Margolis – P Abe
MIL: RF Hodgers – SS Howell – LF LeMoine – 1B M. Rucker – 2B Enriquez – 3B I. Reed – C Delgado – CF Cooper – P Cope

Cope struggled in the first inning and after Cookie’s leadoff double walked Sambrano and DeWeese, but Victor Hodgers limited the damage to one run when he spoiled drives to deep right by both Young and McKnight. Hodgers was hurting the Coons all over, hitting a triple in the bottom 1st to handily score the tying run, but of course Tadasu Abe hadn’t been good since his second start of the year… At least for now it didn’t get any worse, and Matt Nunley hit a solo shot in the third inning to put the Coons ahead again. While Cope hit a leadoff single in the bottom of the inning, the Loggers didn’t get him around. Top 5th, Cookie drew a leadoff walk and ended up on third base after Tony Delgado’s throw to second on his stolen base attempt could not be contained by Howell. Nunley plated him with a single, 3-1, advanced on DeWeese’s groundout, and scored on Young’s single, 4-1. McKnight singled, and then Howard Jones found the gap in left center with a vicious liner that stopped dead against the wall. Both runners scored and Jones slid in with a 2-out triple! While the Coons had more chances that were without exception eventually spoiled by Hodgers alone, like him spearing a Nunley drive to deep right with Cookie on third base in the eighth inning, Abe turned up the volume as soon as he had a comfortable lead, and simply turned away the Loggers from the fifth inning through to two outs in the eighth, when Zach Knowling dropped in a pinch-hit double, but Hodgers couldn’t come through with the bat. Howell struck out to start the ninth before LeMoine walked. Rucker popped out, but Abe lost Enriquez in a full count. Isiah Reed was a left-hander, and anyway Abe’s last batter, which Oberst von Lindenthal explained to him in person and through volume and wild waving with his arms alone – no need for an interpreter – but it worked. Reed struck out, and Abe had a complete game win to bounce back from his recent struggles. 6-1 Critters! Carmona 2-4, BB, 3B, 2B; Nunley 2-5, HR, 2 RBI; Young 3-4, 2 RBI; McKnight 2-4; Abe 9.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 7 K, W (3-7) and 1-4;

In other news

June 14 – ATL SP Pancho Trevino (4-3, 4.28 ERA) gets a no-decision in his 500th career game, a 5-4 loss to the Pacifics, allowing four runs in 6.1 innings. Of note, however, is his strikeout of Foster Leach in the third inning, which puts him into the 3,000 strikeouts club. The 36-year old Puerto Rican is only the ninth member of the club. Starting his career with the Thunder in 2000, Trevino had his most successful time with the Crusaders, having a hand in their five most recent championships (2008-09, 2013-15). He was an All Star three times. For his career, he is 222-146 with a 3.59 ERA.
June 16 – The Falcons churn out nine runs in the eighth inning to come from behind and secure a 10-4 win against the Scorpions.
June 19 – Wolves and Scorpions combine for seven home runs in their Sunday game, with the Wolves coming out on top, 6-5, despite trailing in homers, 4-3.

Complaints and stuff

Trevino is closing in on Brownie rather rapidly, up to 3,009 K, with Brownie seemingly stuck at 3,040.

Top 5 series this year by Raccoons’ runs scored:
22 – Loggers (June 17-19)
21 – Loggers (May 16-19)
18 – Crusaders (June 6-9)
16 – Knights (April 22-24)
15 – Aces (April 8-10)

MORE LOGGERS PLEASE!!

True fact: there’s no pitcher in AAA even remotely deserving a promotion to fill Toner’s spot in the rotation come Tuesday. Jeff Magnotta would be the default option but … it’s ugly. He was 42 walks against 31 strikeouts this season. He’s another log to throw onto the fire of forgotten draft busts.

We will send Will West back to AAA to make room on the roster. The 40-man roster is full, so the call could go to Magnotta after all for a lack of other options, although we could shift Juan Medina to the 60-day DL to open a spot.

Odd fact: Sandy Sambrano’s four walks on Saturday tied a populated franchise record, but it was actually the first time in six years that a Raccoon had drawn four walks in a game. Most recently, Adrian Quebell and Ron Alston had achieved four walks – in consecutive games in August of 2010. Daniel Hall and Clyde Brady did it three times.

Re Adonis Foster: I had a deal lined up last July to flip Stan Murphy for him, then describing him as the Bill Conway type (when Conway was decent). We have a fourth supplemental round pick for not doing that trade, so let’s see what our last supplemental round pick will bring.

[Westheim]

2016 AMATEUR DRAFT

And once again it’s Draft Day! Hundreds of hopeful baseball youth around the nation are hopeful to get picked by one of the 24 teams, and please by one that would be winning a ring about five years from now. Or two. Or more.

The Raccoons would have an exclusive selection of early picks thanks to taking a dump during the 2015 season, which handed them a protected first round pick, and also due to letting four compensation eligible free agents walk that all got signed, which gives us four supplemental round picks. Overall, we have five picks in the first 52, with our highest pick coming at #9. Which brings us straight to the hotlist:

SP Ben Nafe (14/12/9) *
SP Vince Drake (11/12/12) *
SP Chris Klein (13/15/11)
SP John Waker (12/13/14) *
SP Killian Savoie (10/12/16) *

SP/CL Steve Casey (14/13/14) *

CL Ryan Corkum (17/13/12)

C Jaiden Jackson (9/13/10) *
C Kyle Hearn (12/12/10)

1B Pat Fowlkes (14/11/10)

OF/1B/2B Chris Erskine (17/7/9)
RF/LF/1B Dan Brown (10/14/13)
OF/2B/3B Dave Menth (11/12/12) *
LF Brian Miser (11/11/12)

The anomalies with Jackson and Casey have been talked about already, and neither was right at the top of this hotlist, but more bottom-scrapers, and certainly weren’t going to be the #9 pick. With eight teams picking ahead of us, we had drawn up that the first three SP’s would be taken, as well as Erskine, Brown, and one between Menth and Miser, with two teams picking dirt. With that, John Waker would fall to us.

Wouldn’t it be fun to have both of the ghetto kids, Waker and Jackson, going after another with knives in Aumsville?

Losing a hundred games in 2015 had netted the Titans the first overall pick, which they ended up using for SP Chris Klein, the lone college starting pitcher on our hotlist. There goes the quick shot in the arm! The next two picks were outfielders, as like we had expected the Cyclones grabbed Chris Erskine (who was considered close to being major league ready) and the Aces took Dan Brown (who would have been great to have for vanity reasons). The top five were completed by more hotlist players: the Falcons took Pat Fowlkes, while the Capitals selected Dave Menth.

SP Ben Nafe went sixth overall to the Buffaloes, which was rather low if my opinion was to be considered, before the Gold Sox made an odd pick at #7 with SP Manny Suarez, who was buried quite deep on our list. The Blue Sox made another odd pick with outfielder Tom Schorsch, a raw power masher with serious contact issues. That left us with a silent moment to consider switching from John Waker to Vince Drake … or would we pick Ryan Corkum as future closer after all? Juan Calderón had initially listed Drake higher than Waker, but with time seemingly had come to like Waker more. We exhausted our deliberation time in the draft room to the last minute before staying put with John Waker, whom Calderón considered to have a livelier and richer pitch selection right now, and who could easier built on his repertoire later.

Miser went with the next pick to the Wolves, and the Thunder took Ryan Corkum at #15. To my big surprise, Vince Drake still stuck around at the beginning of the supplemental round, but was then taken by the Titans right away with the 25th pick. That left Savoie, Casey, and the two catchers, one of whom wasn’t a catcher, and the group got thinner. Kyle Hearn ended up with the Aces at #27, and #28 was Savoie to the Capitals, leaving the “special cases”, none of whom went to the Buffaloes at #29, and #30 was the Coons’. Do you want to pick a special case with #30? We needed bats in the system, that much was clear, and there was still a very promising outfield bat available in 19-year old Zach Graves, who had not made the hotlist, but was perhaps the sixth or seventh-best outfielder according to Calderón in this draft pool. We did not get another chance at the two special cases: Jaiden Jackson ended up being the #34 pick by the Scorpions, and the Pacifics swiped up Steve Casey with the #39 pick.

We laid our eye on SP David Wayne after that, but the Capitals grabbed him two picks before the Raccoons got another go. We moved on to a centerfielder in Chris Matty, also a high schooler, who was recommended by Calderón. I wanted to pick a high school pitcher at that point, but he was still around a handful of picks later.

2016 PORTLAND RACCOONS DRAFT CLASS

Round 1 (#9) – SP John Waker, 18, from New York, NY – left-handed ghetto kid with an arm strong enough to throw rocks, and able to locate them in the strike zone! He was still adding to his fastball, but he was able to keep all of his stuff low in the zone to generate ground balls. Good curve, promising changeup, and also a fork to supplement all that, with good control. Slim build, he might want to eat a bit more.
Supp. Round (#30) – RF/LF Zach Graves, 19, from Indianapolis, IN – above-average bat across the board with good contact and some pop in it; also a decent-to-good defender and a quick first step to swipe a few bags. Graves is not great in any one area, but he is not worse than average in any important area.
Supp. Round (#45) – CF/LF Chris Matty, 18, from Tinton Falls, NJ – great agility gives him absurd range when roaming centerfield, and he has blistering speed and an uncanny ability to pick the right moment to make a dash for the next base; the bat itself is more of the singles nature, with his slim build preventing him from hitting many deep balls, and he also has to learn some patience at the plate, considering ball four as a personal insult so far.
Supp. Round (#51) – SP Dave Dyer, 18, from Ellicott City, MD – well-balanced mix of a 90mph fastball, slider, and changeup, with the ability to move the fastball to anywhere in the zone with decent precision. Could use another mile an hour or two here or there for sure.
Supp. Round (#52) – INF/LF/RF Justin Chambers, 18, from Chicago, IL – excellent defender that could end up anywhere around the diamond, including at the premium position, shortstop, and not hurt the team with the glove; we consider his glove to be in the upper 20% of the shortstop population. Batting could however be an issue for him, as so far he doesn’t have much power, doesn’t make contact consistently, and sometimes just hacks blindly.
Round 3 (#85) – OF Dwayne Metts, 20, from Wichita, KS – another defense-first outfielder, and also with excellent range to potentially roam centerfield, plus lightning speed; for him his batting is of even more concern, as he definitely has no power to speak of, and he strikes out quite a lot
Round 4 (#109) – CL Steve Rush, 21, from Brooklyn, NY – excellent curveball in addition to a 95mph heater for this right-hander, but the fastball often comes straight, resulting in long ball trouble; also still struggling with control
Round 5 (#133) – C Owen Walker, 20, from Beverly, MA – calls a good game behind the plate, but does not have the best arm; hits for some average, but no power, while striking out quite a bit
Round 6 (#157) – SS Michael Richert, 17, from Bellflower, CA – first off, the bat needs a lot of work. He has a good eye for bad pitches, but as soon as he swings, terrible things happen to him. He only recently quit pitching and started playing shortstop. His arm is quite strong, but his range is limited, which would probably put him more towards third base than shortstop. He is also really fast when going in a straight line.
Round 7 (#181) – CL Roger Coolen, 21, from Cambridge, Canada – swooping curve is accompanied by a 91mph dead-straight fastball for this Canadian right-hander
Round 8 (#205) – C Jared Bragg, 18, from Westerville, OH – decent catching ability and arm, hitting for quite a good average, but even in high school with almost no power; also has too much patience, letting good pitches go by instead of hitting them, then swings over the two-strike stuff
Round 9 (#229) – CL Mike Warmack, 21, from Houston, TX – right-hander with a good 93mph fastball, but the slider sometimes won’t even slide and instead go anywhere
Round 10 (#253) – INF Ian Herbert, 17, from Pasadena, MD – switch-hitting shortstop with good speed and considerable range, which could make him a defensive shortstop even in the Bigs if he could bat at least a little bit; unfortunately the outlook is grim right now
Round 11 (#277) – SP Andy Trexler, 17, from Grafton, OH – even at this young age he hits his spots … and he has to, given that his 85mph fastball isn’t shocking anybody; slider and circle change both need heavy work to get him anywhere other than accounting school
Round 12 (#301) – SS Chris Tibbetts, 19, from Brooklyn, NY – also more of a glove-first shortstop, with even more holes in his swing
Round 13 (#325) – C Steve Work, 22, from Huntingburg, IN – well, he gives his best…

All additions were stuck with our A-level team, the Aumsville Beagles.

Along with the draft pumping players into the system, it also always spit out other players that had been drafted in years prior, and had turned out to be duds. Like f.e. 2013 second-rounder 1B Russ Greenwald, who was batting .180 in Ham Lake for the second consecutive year. Going hard on 23, and with hardly any idea what else to do with him, he was made the headliner to the list of players handed their papers and released. Also gone: southpaws John King (2014, 8th round) and Joe Morley (2015, 11th round), right-handers Cody Burdette (2015, 13th round), outfielder Mitch Vanoy (2014, 11th round), and a few scouting discoveries that were just occupying seats on the team bus in Aumsville. After the initial wave of releases, we were still overweight by about five players.

Odd fact: “Icon” Waker has the same nickname as Mark “Icon” Allen had, who was on the Raccoons almost 30 years ago. Not only did we pick “Icon” Waker in this draft class, but there was also an unrelated Mark Allen in the pool.

I messed up the 13th round pick when I actually had settled on another lefty pitcher but then actually hit the draft button to take the scouting recommendation. I suck endlessly…

[Westheim]

Raccoons (34-32) vs. Indians (31-37) – June 20-22, 2016

The two worst offensive teams would be pitted against another in this 3-game set, with the Indians’ 252 runs scored ranking 11th, six counters better than the Coons’ league-worst 246 runs. Their pitching was quite good and efficient, and was good enough for the fourth-least runs conceded in the league, despite a more mediocre rotation, which could rely on the second-best bullpen. Coming into this series, they were in a tremendous rut, having lost seven straight games prior to a 6-2 win over Boston on Sunday, and they had only won four games in the entire month. This season series was so far tied, 3-3.

Projected matchups:
Chris Munroe (2-4, 3.26 ERA) vs. Tom Weise (5-7, 4.53 ERA)
Jeff Magnotta (0-0) vs. Kyle Lamb (0-2, 5.75 ERA)
Nick Brown (6-5, 2.47 ERA) vs. Dan Lambert (3-4, 3.84 ERA)

Magnotta would be in there due to a total lack of other ideas. We could have tried Blake Kelly, our 2012 seventh-rounder, but he also had grief control issues, so why not stick to the stick that didn’t stick the first time? Magnotta will oppose the Indians’ only southpaw, Lamb. This is only a stopgap solution for this one game and Magnotta will be back to AAA afterwards. We have another off day on Thursday ahead of playing for 17 days straight before the All Star Game, but with the off day we will not need another guy until the following Tuesday rather than this Sunday.

Game 1
IND: LF Baker – CF J. Wilson – 2B Kym – 1B S. Guerra – RF Gilmor – C Padilla – SS Matias – 3B Tolwith – P Weise
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B A. Young – SS McKnight – RF Richards – C McNeela – P Munroe

It would be interesting to see how pulling all the left-handed registers against the obligatorily opposing Tom Weise would work, but the left-handers quite definitely worked for the Indians against rule 5 pick Chris Munroe. He walked Josh Baker in the first, John Wilson singled, the Indians scored the first run on Jong-beom Kym’s sac fly (who was not a left-hander), and Nick Gilmor, another left-handed batter, also singled before Dave Padilla flew out to very deep right. The Coons in the bottom 1st opened with consecutive doubles by Cookie and Shane Walter before simply stopping. Back to the Indians in the top 2nd, Munroe hit Tom Weise to give the Indians a 2-out runner, then fell to an RBI double by Baker, singles by Wilson and Kym, which ran the score to 3-1, and then Richards had to dash after the next drive to very deep right to pick a Guerra rocket off the fence. The Indians would only score one run from having the bases loaded with no outs in the third inning, but it was pretty obvious that Munroe had absolutely nothing.

Meanwhile, the Coons’ catching dilemma resolved itself when Tom McNeela limped off the field after legging out an infield single in the bottom of the second inning. That single put two on with one out, Munroe bunted them over into scoring position, but Cookie flew out to Wilson in center to end the inning. The Coons would go on to strand pairs of runners in the next two innings, scoring one run in between on a Nunley groundout. Munroe put up zeroes in the fourth and fifth before finally some power came through. DeWeese hit a leadoff double in the bottom 5th before Adam Young hit a no-doubter to right center – WELL outta here. This, only his fifth homer for the team, and the first in almost a month, out of a hoped-for 25, put the Raccoons even at four. McKnight doubled right afterwards, only to be stranded, but Tom Weise then hit a leadoff double in the top 6th and was promptly scored on productive outs, giving the lead back to the Indians, their third in the game.

Munroe was gone after a leadoff single by Guerra in the seventh, but Seung-mo Chun bailed him out. The bottom 7th saw a leadoff single to center by DeWeese, representing the tying run, before Adam Young grounded to the right side. Kym made a lunging stop, but the ball broke free when he hit the ground, and the required second grab gave Young enough time to leg out an infield single without dismembering himself like McNeela had done. McKnight’s dull fly out to left was as close as the Raccoons came to tying the game; Richards struck out and Margolis rolled out to Raul Matias. The Raccoons also stranded the tying run on second base in the eighth inning when Cookie had doubled and then came emptiness. The ninth saw Jarrod Morrison, a right-hander, chainsaw them off in just three batters. 5-4 Indians. Carmona 2-5, 2 2B; Walter 2-4, 2 2B, RBI; DeWeese 3-5, 2B; Young 2-5, HR, 2 RBI; McKnight 3-5, 2B; McNeela 1-1; Chun 1.2 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K;

We out-hit them 14-11, and it seems like even six doubles and a homer among 14 hits is not enough to score a decent amount of runs with this team of open sores.

McNeela had a tender hamstring, which would require at least two weeks of rest, which resulted in a switch of catchers between the roster and DL, as Alonso Baca was activated from his rehab assignment in AAA, though facing a southpaw on Tuesday the next start would actually go to Margolis. In another roster move, Will West (4.2 IP, 0 R, 4 K) was sent back to AAA to make room for Jeff Magnotta, who had pitched to a 6.05 ERA in 19.1 innings in the Bigs last year, and had a 5.42 ERA in AAA this year, with 46 walks opposed by 37 strikeouts. Last year in St. Pete, he had still had 90 K to 67 walks…

Game 2
IND: LF Baker – CF J. Wilson – 2B Kym – 1B S. Guerra – RF Gilmor – C Padilla – SS Matias – 3B Tolwith – P Lamb
POR: CF Carmona – 1B Sambrano – 3B Walter – LF DeWeese – SS Jones – 2B Bergquist – C Margolis – RF Stubbs – P Magnotta

Josh Baker opened the game with a hard single, but Magnotta held the Indians off the board for two innings. Raul Matias would open the third with a double off the centerfield wall, an already unpleasant event, but that was nothing against Kyle Lamb’s 1-out double up the rightfield line that scored Matias for the first run of the game. A walk to Baker and Wilson’s single loaded the bases and sent the bullpen stretching, but Jong-beom Kym hit into a double play. Magnotta was bailed out with a double play once more in the fourth before the ground swallowed him whole in the fifth. A leadoff walk to Aaron Tolwith opened the abyss. After Lamb’s bunt, the Indians put Baker and Wilson on with consecutive infield singles, and Magnotta registered only one more out from the next four batters, with doubles flying all over the park. Also, a wild pitch. John Korb got a fly out to center from Matias to end the inning with runners on the corners, but the Raccoons were down 5-0 and had so far not shown any offensive ambitions.

There were bad news for the Indians, though. Kyle Lamb allowed a leadoff walk to Danny Margolis in the bottom 5th before Matt Stubbs singled to left. The pitching coach and trainer hustled out after that, having seen something not to their liking, and Lamb was removed on the spot. Right-hander Mike Daniels took over, first facing Korb, who bunted over the runners to give Cookie a good chance to score two, which he promptly did with a single to center, 5-2. Korb would put the Coons into the seventh, but allowed a 1-out double to Kym. Guerra grounded out, with Sugano called on to retire Nick Gilmor and end the inning. Gilmor homered in a full count, which pretty much put Sugano on the heap of broken toys for good, and also put the game far out of reach for good. The Indians piled on another two runs in both the eighth and ninth innings, three of which were on Gallegos, and the last one was on Beaver, who became the second left-handed reliever on the day to allow a 2-run homer to left-handed batter Nick Gilmor. 11-2 Indians. Carmona 2-4, 2 RBI; Bergquist 2-4; McKnight (PH) 1-1;

Four and two thirds, 11 hits and five runs is probably not a good resume if you want to apply for more starts.

Or not being removed from the 40-man roster.

I also heard there shouting and some thudding sounds in the Raccoons’ locker room after the game, but I am too afraid to investigate.

Two roster moves were being made after this game, with Magnotta dumped back where he didn’t belong, either, but could do damage to his team less visibly, and Matt Stubbs was also dropped, batting .174 in limited usage. Jimmy Fucito (…….) was promoted from Ham Lake (!!), where he had batted .348/.455/.587 since being dumped there to become the right-handed non-presence in the outfield. Also up: right-hander Gary Dupes, 26, the third piece of the Cookie/Dingus trade that was still in the organization, although he was relegated to swingman duties in AAA, pitghing to a 3.12 ERA this season, but also with high walk numbers.

Dupes was already on the 40-man roster, but Fucito wasn’t. Juan Medina was moved to the 60-day DL – he was not expected to return this season anyway.

Game 3
IND: CF J. Wilson – SS Matias – 2B Kym – 1B S. Guerra – C Padilla – RF Gilmor – 3B Tolwith – LF Baker – P Lambert
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B A. Young – SS McKnight – C Baca – RF Richards – P Brown

Alonso Baca homered in his first plate appearance since returning from injury, plating McKnight to give the Coons their first lead in the series, 2-0 in the bottom 2nd. DeWeese added a run with a sac fly in the third inning. Nick Brown didn’t fool anybody, but utilized our ‘special’ baseballs with metal core, and Slappy had flicked on the power to the magnetic layer under the infield, driving the Indians nuts with grounder after grounder after grounder. Then he came to bat in the bottom 4th, seeing three on with no outs after a walk to McKnight and consecutive singles by Baca and Richards. Brownie was the first of two foul pop victims in the inning, with only Cookie chasing a run home with a sac fly hit to center, 4-0. Nunley hit a leadoff single in the fifth, DeWeese walked, and Nunley scored on productive outs (yay!) to bring the score to 5-0.

Something happened between innings then, because in the sixth the Indians suddenly whacked the ball. Opening with two hard singles by Wilson and Matias they put runners on the corners. Brown gave his all, and was lucky that Kym smacked a ball right to Nunley. While that was only good for an out at second base and Wilson scored, 5-1, the Indians would not get another hit in the inning and a subtle inspection by Oberst von Lindenthal (who dug a trench along the first base line after the unsuccessful bottom of the sixth) found that the metal layer under the field was no longer magnetic. After the game we would find out that Slappy had boozed and had fallen asleep in the control room, knocking over the evil lever for exactly this park ‘feature’. Brownie switched back to regular baseballs and struck out the side in the seventh to the delight of the home crowd. Brownie got one more out in the seventh after walking Mike Denny initially, and Chris Mathis took over with the lefty Wilson being disposed of with an easy fly to left. While the first thing that Mathis did would be a balk to move Denny to scoring position, the Indians never got another base runner against either him or Seung-mo Chun in the ninth inning, and this one was Brownie’s. 5-1 Brownies! Nunley 2-4; DeWeese 1-2, BB, RBI; Baca 2-3, BB, HR, 2 RBI; Richards 2-4, 2B; Brown 7.1 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 6 K, W (7-5);

Raccoons (35-34) @ Aces (39-34) – June 24-26, 2016

The Aces were in the – for them – unusual position of being in the hunt, sitting 1 1/2 games out in the South. They were the third-best offensive team in the league and had average pitching with a soft and squishy bullpen. The season series stood at 2-1 in their favor.

Projected matchups:
Hector Santos (7-3, 2.02 ERA) vs. William Hinkley (8-3, 4.28 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (3-7, 4.59 ERA) vs. Nehemiah Jones (6-5, 4.13 ERA)
Chris Munroe (2-5, 3.61 ERA) vs. Alonso Alonso (3-7, 5.90 ERA)

The Aces only had right-handed starting pitchers. They could skip Alonso to bring Juan Valdevez (6-3, 2.15 ERA) into this series, however.

Game 1
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B A. Young – SS McKnight – C Baca – RF Richards – P Santos
LVA: 1B Bovane – RF B. Miller – SS Burke – CF Struck – C D. Rice – 2B R. Walsh – LF Hubbard – 3B Reeve – P Hinkley

Hinkley’s leadoff walk to Cookie in the first inning cost him, as DeWeese rapped his 11th homer of the year to put the Raccoons up early, 2-0. In a perfect world you’d relax know and let your 2.02 ERA guy do his thing, but while Santos had a quick first inning, the second saw deep drives by Geoff Struck and Danny Rice defused on the track by Richards and Carmona, respectively, before Rich Walsh hit one out to cut the lead in half. Jimmy Hubbard hit a hard single to left, enough to look after Santos, who claimed to be fine and ended the inning with a K to Ron Reeve. Santos threw hard and the Aces swung hard, resulting either in no contact or very hard contact. McKnight homered in the top of the fourth, only the Coons’ second hit against Hinkley, but Santos gave the additional run right back with two hard hits against him in the bottom of the inning. In a disturbing contrast to Brownie’s game on Wednesday, every ball put in play by the Aces was usually enough to sound the alarm. He also had six strikeouts through four innings, but the bottom 5th opened in cringing fashion with Hinkley (!) hitting a ball so ****ing hard right at Nunley that survival instinct took over for Matt and he turned away and swiped to keep the damn ball off his face. That worked to a certain degree – the ball was kept in the infield, Nunley kept all his teeth, but he was assessed an error. The 3-2 lead was then protected by Cookie and Richards making circus plays on Bill Miller and Brent Burke, respectively.

Shane Walter’s leadoff single in the sixth was the Critters’ first hit not a homer in this game, and the Aces probably made a mistake by not pitching Nunley hard in to unnerve him after just barely holding on to his little black nose in the field before. Nunley didn’t swing at anything and walked eventually. DeWeese grounded out, but Young put another knife in the team effort with a glaring strikeout. McKnight bounced one over to Bovane – who inexplicably missed a perfectly playable ball, leaving McKnight with a stunning 2-out, 2-run single to right. The two runs proved to be not much cushion soon enough, with Santos rocked for another three hits and two runs in the bottom of the inning before departing the game in shame. More shame in the eighth, as Sugano was put in for a string of left-handers, walked Struck and Rice and was then chased from the game. Thrasher took over, with Bobby Diersing bunting the tying run to third and the go-ahead run to second base, now with one out. Rusty Beard popped out before Thrasher obliterated Reeve with a 2-2 heater to spoil the Aces’ chance. Cookie got on and was caught stealing in the top of the ninth, so no insurance run from there, either, and Thrasher remained in the game in the bottom ninth. Ahmed Williams struck out before Raúl Bovane singled. Bill Miller struck out, and then he hit Burke. Putting in Kevin Beaver for Geoff Struck would probably be as much of a folly as leaving Thrasher in to blow the game, and we were committed now. Oberst von Lindenthal did a flyover with a Douglas Skymaster and dropped a supply crate with a hand-written pep talk: “GET TO ****ING WORK!” Struck grounded out to Sandy Sambrano at second to end the inning. 5-4 Furballs. Walter 2-4; McKnight 2-4, HR, 3 RBI; Thrasher 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 3 K, SV (7);

Game 2
POR: CF Carmona – RF Sambrano – 3B Walter – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – SS McKnight – C Baca – 2B H. Jones – P Abe
LVA: LF Flack – RF B. Miller – SS Burke – CF Struck – C D. Rice – 2B R. Walsh – 1B Bovane – 3B Reeve – P N. Jones

The Raccoons again jumped out to a lead in the first inning, this time with a triple by Walter, DeWeese walking, and Adam Young doubling into the corner in rightfield. The 1-0 lead was soon obliterated with Abe loading the bases with nobody out in the bottom 1st. Adam Flack singled, Miller doubled, and Burke walked. While Struck hit into a double play, a run scored there, and Miller scored on Danny Rice’s single. Cookie would tie the game with a 2-out RBI single in the second inning, and the score would remain 2-2 through six for two main reasons. First, the Raccoons did little to no hitting, and second, Abe kept getting bailed out by the defense. Cookie made a breakneck play in the fourth inning, and Jones and Walter each started a direly needed double play in the fifth and sixth innings. That was it for Abe, who was hit for to start the seventh. Nunley singled in his spot, Sandy Sambrano also singled, and then Walter hit into a double play. In the eighth inning, both teams went on to make outs on the base paths. DeWeese was caught stealing by Danny Rice, while the Aces had Rice on second base with two outs in the bottom 8th, the result of yet another Sugano walk. Chris Mathis allowed a single to center to Ahmed Williams, with Rice sent around third base, only to find himself thrown out by Cookie Carmona. The game remained tied. Both leftfielders made two sparkling plays each in the ninth inning to deny any offense and send the game to extras, where the tie was broken in the 11th. Michael Sieben pitched for the Aces in his second inning and had allowed Alonso Baca on base with a single. Jones made the second out before Nunley came up with two hits in two appearances since pinch-hitting earlier. He got his third one, a rocket blast high and deep to right, and gone! The Aces would show us three left-handers in the bottom 11th, and with Sugano and Beaver already used, we were in a bit of a bad spot. Thrasher was sent out after having thrown 31 pitches the previous day. He struck out Rice and Walsh in full counts before Ahmed Williams grounded out to Sambrano on first base. 4-2 Coons. Carmona 2-6, RBI; Young 2-3, BB, 2B, RBI; Nunley (PH) 3-3, HR, 2 RBI; Mathis 2.1 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 0 K, W (3-1);

Game 3
POR: CF Carmona – SS Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – 2B Sambrano – RF Richards – C Margolis – P Munroe
LVA: LF Flack – RF B. Miller – SS Burke – CF Struck – C D. Rice – 2B R. Walsh – 1B A. Williams – 3B Reeve – P A. Alonso

Offense was low early on in this game. While Munroe was struggling with control, the Aces had only one hit in the first four innings, a Williams double, which moved Rich Walsh to third base in the bottom 2nd, from where Ron Reeve scored him with a sac fly. The Coons didn’t make that run up until the fifth. Young singled, was forced out by Sambrano, but Sandy then stole second base and came home on Ron Richards’ single. The Aces would have two hard singles in the bottom 5th, but Geoff Struck’s liner was caught mid-flight by Sambrano before it could get into centerfield, denying the Aces another lead. Instead, the Coons grabbed a 2-1 advantage in the top of the sixth. Walter hit a 1-out single, after which Nunley hit one hard to deep left, but was denied on the track by Adam Flack. DeWeese then walked, and Young singled to center, plating Walter from second base.

Munroe lasted six and two thirds with the lead, but when he got back to the top of the order, we saw two left-handers there, then the righty Burke, then another four left-handed bats. With Sugano and Thrasher having been used in both games in this set already, this was a case for the Beaver, hopefully. Adam Flack hit an infield single to immediately dampen the mood, but then was caught stealing by Margolis, who bumped his CS% to a meager 25% with this good throw. Alonso was still going in the eighth, which was a dangerous game by the Aces. Walter hit another 1-out single and Nunley walked to build pressure, but still no reliever in sight. And why would they bother with a reliever? DeWeese grounded out and Young flailed embarrassingly to end the inning, but Beaver was burned with three hard singles by Beard, Diersing, and Rice in the bottom of the inning to not only blow the lead, but also fall 3-2 behind. Michael Sieben, the loser on Saturday, retired McKnight, Richards, and Baca in order to end the game. 3-2 Aces. Walter 2-4; Young 2-4, RBI; Munroe 6.2 IP, 3 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 3 BB, 4 K;

More shouting in the locker room. I will pretend they are discussing who has the prettiest jewelry while I pack my **** so we can get to the airport.

In other news

June 21 – There are no less than six half-innings of 3+ runs in the Falcons’ 14-9 win over the Bayhawks. CHA LF/RF Domino Nieves (.304, 3 HR, 19 RBI) contributes by going 4-for-5 with a double and a homer, plating five.
June 24 – The Crusaders’ and Bayhawks’ 12-inning game ends in favor of the home team with NYC 3B Alex Rivas (.248, 8 HR, 39 RBI) belting a walkoff grand slam off Jayden Maness.
June 25 – The Gold Sox not only rout the Capitals, 13-0, but they also score all of their runs right in the first inning. After the 13-run top of the first the game becomes a bit of a lull, though.
June 26 – The Warriors’ Jose Flores (8-5, 3.73 ERA) spins a 5-hit shutout in the Warriors’ 14-0 rout of the Rebels.

Complaints and stuff

We are currently seventh in the power rankings. I don’t know what they’re smoking at BNN, but I want some. Chad, our resident glue sniffer, too.

This week I could have done some trades and didn’t do them. One would have been a flip of Jason Bergquist for the Capitals’ Calvin Morris, a right-hander making an open stink in D.C. for not being in the rotation. Truth be told, his career record was not exactly a recommendation letter for a starting job, but we had a hole to fill, maybe two if Munroe was on the downwards trend. But I didn’t do that, despite Bergquist being about fourth on the depth chart at second base right now. The Capitals also tried to get rid of Toki Hayashi, a right-handed outfield bat, but Hayashi was in a terrible rut and was making $2M this year, which was not a good combo (especially with the international free agent period right around the corner). The Cyclones had 3B Pedro Cruz available, but there was the slight issue of us already having a very good third baseman in Matt Nunley, and neither had experience anywhere else.

Ron Richards notified me that the clubhouse was a right mess and that he couldn’t bare the negative factors in there. I had to remove them.

Dear Ron, nobody’s going to accept your pelt in any trade, and DeWeese might be an asshole, but he’s the only guy hitting for any vague power. He also has a shot at 90 RBI, which would be something for this rotten team…

In that 13-run inning game on Saturday, the Capitals got three shutout innings from Cássio Boda in long relief. Boda has been up and down between the majors and AAA ever since they acquired him in 2009. Last year he actually managed a decent season, going 8-5 with a 3.35 ERA in 22 games (20 starts), pitching 137 big league innings, the most in his career at age 32. Overall he’s 28-27 with a 4.00 ERA in 97 games, including a lot of bouncing.

Funny exercise! Let’s analyze the two Boda trades! We got him from the Titans in January of 2006 in the package for Al Martin (and a 12th-rounder that never made the majors) that made room for Adrian Quebell to take over on first base. The other incoming players were certified flashes in the pan J.C. Crespo and Ricardo Martinez. Besides Martinez having one of those great half-seasons to replace Danny Sharp on the field (but not in our hearts), almost driving Nick Brown up a tree with his butcherous defense at third base, and this deal also ruining Al Martin’s career, it also set the points for eight-and-a-half years of being annoyed over Quebell. The outward trade was at first unspectacular, receiving Pat White from the Capitals at the winter meetings in 2009. White did little of note here, but that had been true for Boda, too.

White was later included with Brett Gentry in the trade with the Buffaloes that brought Joe Cowan and Danny Margolis to Portland, with us still suffering through the latter. Ricardo Martinez, interestingly, netted us Bill Conway from the Rebels in November of 2010, which if nothing else at least created an interesting story line with him leading the CL ERA race in August of 2014 only to explode in September. Now with the Gold Sox, he’s employed exclusively in relief, while Martinez is still giving pitchers shivers, but has only 171 big league at-bats since being dumped by the Rebels after 2012. He got those with the Gold Sox in 2015, but batted .199 for it.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (37-35) vs. Condors (41-34) – June 27-29, 2016

The CL South-leading Condors were more of an offensive team, scoring the second-most runs, but their pitching was certainly not bad, ranking fifth in runs allowed. Their rotation was even fourth in ERA. So far, the Raccoons had won two of three games from them.

Projected matchups:
Nick Brown (7-5, 2.39 ERA) vs. Troy McCaskill (9-4, 2.50 ERA)
Gary Dupes (0-0) vs. Manuel Rojas (4-8, 3.45 ERA)
Hector Santos (8-3, 2.27 ERA) vs. Michael Colvard (7-4, 4.00 ERA)

Three more right-handers in this set.

Game 1
TIJ: SS Dasher – 1B Gershkovich – LF Eichelkraut – CF Feldmann – RF Branch – C J. Vargas – 2B Lafon – 3B D. Jones – P McCaskill
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – SS McKnight – C Baca – RF Richards – P Brown

It didn’t take long for this one to go wrong. Nick Brown threw 12 pitches before leaving the game with back pain, which was something that usually befell old people and then often wouldn’t go away anymore. Ezra Branch was on first base after a leadoff single in the second inning when Brown departed. John Korb walked and balked long enough to allow Branch to score, which of course then hung on Brown. The loss was not his, however, as the Raccoons got something going in the bottom 3rd. Korb hit a leadoff single, lined over Dasher at short (not his natural position, which was occupied by Dan Jones), before Cookie struck out and Walter popped one for another easy red dot on the board. Then Nunley doubled past the reach of Branch in right, DeWeese walked in a full count and to everybody’s bafflement Adam Young proved useful for once, hitting a single to center to score a pair and flip the score in Korb’s favor, 2-1. McKnight upped the score to 4-1 with a 2-run double that just barely went past the reach of Ryan Feldmann in center. Young would come through again in the fifth inning with a solo homer, which negated a run on Seung-mo Chun in the top of the inning. While Korb had gone 2-for-2 at the plate, he had expended almost 60 pitches, all he had, for three innings. Chun took over after a leadoff walk to Jones in the top 5th, and while Jones was removed on a force play after a bad bunt by McCaskill, the Condors still got a run across, and two more in the sixth on a 2-run homer by Dan Jones. Shane Walter’s 2-out RBI single in the bottom 6th brought the score to 6-4 as this one could still go either way, especially with the Raccoons burning through their bullpen.

They arrived at Juan Gallegos by the seventh, which was asking for a blown lead and a sour defeat for sure. Gallegos allowed a 2-out double to Jimmy Oatmeal in the seventh, with the Condor swiftly flying home on Feldmann’s single to left, cutting the lead to 6-5. And they were only picking up speed. Gallegos was ravaged for four hits in the eighth inning – all those runners came in to score; two against Gallegos, and the other two on Mike Gershkovich’s 2-run double off the wall and off Ron Thrasher. Feldmann plated Gershkovich with another 2-out single for good measure, blasting the Raccoons away in a 5-run inning. 10-6 Condors. Carmona 3-5; Nunley 2-4, 2B; Young 3-4, BB, HR, 3 RBI;

With red alert sounding throughout the clubhouse, the Druid hurried out the same night to organize a 200 gallon barrel of pickle brine for Brownie to tread wat- … brine in for the next few days. That was certainly going to help him heal his back in time for the next scheduled start on Saturday!

In the meantime, all players were slightly befuddled at the barreled, naked Brownie being stowed away in a corner of the weight room, glaring at them while clawing into the corner of the barrel.

Meanwhile, Dupes… which rhymes with “Oops” …

Game 2
TIJ: SS Dasher – 1B Gershkovich – RF Branch – LF Eichelkraut – C J. Vargas – CF Feldmann – 2B Lafon – 3B D. Jones – P M. Rojas
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – 1B Young – SS McKnight – RF Richards – LF Sambrano – C Baca – P Dupes

“Oops” indeed – on the Condors, who went hitless the first time through, with three strikeouts against them. Dan Jones drawing a walk was all they got, but Jones also made a big throwing error in the bottom 2nd to put Adam Young on second base with no outs. Young went on to be scored by a soft 2-out single by Sambrano past the reach of Dasher, giving Dupes a 1-0 advantage. “Doom” Rojas made the capital mistake of issuing a leadoff walk to the opposing pitcher in the bottom 3rd. While Cookie grounded out, Walter singled and Nunley hit a 2-run double, later scoring himself on a single by McKnight to run the score to 4-0. But the Coons had also scored four runs before the Condors on Monday before the Condors had scored ten runs before the Raccoons, who got there … never. And this was a guy pitching with a career ERA of 9.19 …

… and the Condors were comin’. Branch drew a walk in the fourth, but was caught stealing, which ended up costing them. Jimmy Oatmeal singled, their first hit in the game, before Dupes also walked Jose Vargas. In a full count, Feldmann struck out swinging to end the inning. Roland Lafon’s leadoff single in the fifth went under with two pops and a bunt in between, but the sixth saw another leadoff single by Gershkovich. A passed ball moved him to second and the Condors sent him when Branch singled to center, but Gershkovich ended up thrown out at home by Cookie Carmona. Cookie also spoiled Oatmeal’s fly to left center before Vargas grounded out to McKnight. Six shutout innings, somehow, for Dupes. While we were still wondering how he was doing it, Ron Richards showed a sign of life with a 2-run homer in the bottom 6th, running the score to 6-0 and evicting Rojas from the game. Dupes would get five more outs before walking Gershkovich, ending his outing on 111 pitches, the last nine of them to the Condors’ first baseman. Sugano came out to face Branch, walked him on four pitches, then left Mathis to deal with the resulting mess. Jimmy Oatmeal hit an RBI single past Nunley, his 50th RBI on the year (…!!), but Vargas grounded out afterwards. The Condors then showed off Daniel Dickerson in the bottom 8th. He came in with an ERA over seven, and left with an ERA over eight, allowing two runs mainly due to Sandy Sambrano’s RBI triple. 8-1 Coons. Richards 2-3, BB, HR, 2 RBI; Sambrano 2-4, 3B, 2 RBI; Dupes 7.2 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 4 BB, 6 K, W (1-0);

I’m starting to give everybody days off already to spread the load. DeWeese sat out this one (but pinch-hit), and Cookie will get a day off on Wednesday before we have the Crusaders over for four.

Game 3
TIJ: SS Dasher – 1B Gershkovich – RF Branch – LF Eichelkraut – C J. Vargas – CF Feldmann – 2B Eroh – 3B D. Jones – P Colvard
POR: CF Sambrano – 2B H. Jones – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – SS McKnight – RF Richards – C Margolis – P Santos

The Critters took a 1-0 lead in the bottom 2nd again when DeWeese homered, but when McKnight tripled with one out, Richards and Margolis left him rotting on third base. Santos struggled with control and allowed deep drives, which was a dangerous mix. His walk to Branch to start the fourth inning was his second leadoff walk in the game, and this one got punished when Oatmeal hit his 19th homer (……) of the season, flipping the score in favor of the Condors, 2-1. Santos’ pitch count also escalated quickly, though not as quickly as the score. He walked Feldmann in the sixth inning, Ron Eroh singled, and there was some concern that we had to dig into the pen early yet again before Dan Jones homered, blowing out Santos 5-1 and we were assured that we had to get digging. The bullpen exploded just as it had on Monday, with four runs across parts of two innings on Seung-mo Chun, who had just about lost all effectivity. The same was true for Kevin Beaver, if he ever had had any effectivity. Beaver was romped in the ninth inning, with Feldmann and Dasher both belting 2-run bombs off him. The Raccoons managed all of five hits against Colvard and two relievers. 13-1 Condors. DeWeese 2-4, HR, RBI; Bergquist 1-1;

I could use an entirely new bullpen… thankfully the only guaranteed contract in there for 2017 is Thrasher’s $500k, and I’m pretty sure I can trade him for a bat boy. No, Esteban, you’ve got a new family now!! (won’t let go of crying Condors’ bat boy’s foot)

Raccoons (38-37) vs. Crusaders (52-25) – June 30-July 3, 2016

This was going to hurt. If the Condors could ruffle the Raccoons’ disoriented pitching for eight runs per game on average, the Crusaders would have no problems to rip them for 50 over the long weekend. They had won their last six games, their offense had started pumping after a lame April and was up to fourth in the league, and they had the outright best pitching. June wasn’t quite over, but their run differential was just under +100. Their bullpen had a 1.95 ERA. They had lost four of six to the Coons so far, but there was nothing in their way to a 4-game sweep this weekend. This would also destroy the last tiny bit of a chance the Raccoons had if they finally got going and the Crusaders would finally stop creaming people. Nope, the Raccoons would get raped top to bottom, and be out of the playoffs by the first week of July.

Projected matchups:
Tadasu Abe (3-7, 4.48 ERA) vs. Hwa-pyung Choe (8-2, 2.56 ERA)
Chris Munroe (2-5, 3.42 ERA) vs. Doug Thompson (5-4, 3.16 ERA)
Nick Brown (7-5, 2.45 ERA) vs. Fernando Cruz (9-5, 3.77 ERA)
Gary Dupes (1-0, 1.17 ERA) vs. Randy McMullen (2-2, 2.25 ERA)

Brownie was a bit of a “maybe”, but likely to make his scheduled start (and if not, the results would be mildly catastrophic). The last two starters of theirs will be left-handers, and before you complain about that rotation of theirs, mind that we will a) miss “Midnight” Martin (7-2, 2.26 ERA), and b) they have ****ing Curtis Tobitt on the DL.

Why am I even crying? We were doomed before the season ever began.

Game 1
NYC: RF Bailey – 2B Caraballo – LF M. Ortíz – 1B Manfull – CF W. Jones – SS Paull – C Durango – 3B Rivas – P Choe
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – SS McKnight – RF Richards – C Baca – P Abe

When Eduardo Durango and Alex Rivas went to the corners with hits to start the third inning, I already felt tired. That Choe bunted pointlessly, Will Bailey struck out, and Francisco Caraballo’s ugly liner to right was spoiled by Ron Richards didn’t seem believable and maybe I was dreaming already. But no, it was reality. One inning later, the Crusaders had two on with two outs when Adam “****ing” Young dropped Walter’s feed to put Durango on base as well, after which Abe ran a 3-0 count to Alex Rivas, who lined to left, where the ball fell into no man’s land and plated two.

Surprisingly, the Raccoons mounted a quick comeback. After the Korean Choe had held them to one hit in the first three innings, they rapped out four hits to start the bottom of the fourth inning. Walter singled, Nunley singled, DeWeese doubled, and Young singled, plating three runs to take the lead. Abe could have been the first pitcher this week going about his pitch count in economic fashion, but that didn’t happen as he needed 100 pitches through six innings while walking one and whiffing eight. He got Choe to ground out at the start of the seventh inning, but with left-handers approaching was then replaced by Sugano, who had been **** for a few weeks now. Here, he struck out Bailey before walking two. PH Miguel Salinas grounded out (and why would you ever bat for B.J. Manfull!?). The Raccoons got a valuable insurance run in the bottom 7th when Nunley singled home Cookie with two outs, Choe still dealing. Mathis pitched the eighth and allowed hard contact to Winston Jones, Eric Paull, and Durango in order, and DeWeese had to shake his limbs to spoil all three potential extra-base hits, which he achieved successfully. Thrasher pitched a clean ninth with much less drama. 4-2 Raccoons. Walter 3-4; Nunley 2-4, RBI; Abe 6.1 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 0 ER, 1 BB, 8 K, W (4-7);

When Salinas hit for Manfull, it ended B.J.’s 18-game hitting streak. He had gone 0-for-3 against Abe.

Game 2
NYC: RF Bailey – SS Paull – LF M. Ortíz – 1B Manfull – CF W. Jones – C Lowe – 2B J. Ortega – 3B Rivas – P D. Thompson
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – SS McKnight – RF Richards – C Baca – P Munroe

The Crusaders got going quickly with Munroe walking Bailey before Martin Ortíz casually popped his 16th homer of the season for a 2-0 New York advantage. It got worse in the second inning for all the wrong reasons. Jorge Ortega and Alex Rivas opened with singles before Thompson’s bunt was taken to third base by completely ******ed first birdman Adam Young. Ortega arrived well ahead of the throw, and all hands were safe. Although Bailey fouled out, the first out in the inning, the Crusaders then went to work. Eric Paull drove in two, Ortíz walked, and Manfull plated two more with a hard single to right. Winston Jones made it 7-0 with a single, and Munroe was removed after Walter botched the play on Drew Lowe’s grounder to reload the bases. John Korb allowed a run on Ortega’s sac fly, but by that point it didn’t matter anymore. The Raccoons had the bases loaded with one out in the bottom 3rd (after another hit by Korb, no less). R.J. DeWeese came up with an RBI single, 8-1, yay, before Young ****ed his way into a double play. That was neither the first, nor the last double play the Raccoons hit into that day, but as usual Young’s was going to be the worst.

Despite all the rage and tears, the Raccoons (sans Munroe) managed to escape this game with only one black eye and managed to finish the contest with just two relievers and with no more runs allowed. On the other side of the box score, Thompson threw a complete game with 11 hits and four walks, but only allowed three runs thanks to double play galore, three in total. 8-3 Crusaders. Walter 2-5, RBI; DeWeese 2-4, HR, 2 RBI; Jones (PH) 1-1; Korb 4.1 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 2 K and 1-2; Beaver 3.1 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 3 K;

Next, Nick Brown. His skin below his nipples is slightly greenish and he has a goddamn awful stench that will kill all the hair in your nostrils, but the back is fine again and maybe he can be better than Munroe…

Game 3
NYC: 3B Salinas – 2B Caraballo – LF M. Ortíz – RF W. Jones – SS Paull – C Durango – 1B Bailey – CF Brissett – P F. Cruz
POR: CF Carmona – SS H. Jones – 3B Walter – LF DeWeese – 1B Sambrano – 2B Bergquist – RF Fucito – C Margolis – P Brown

Another Brownie start, another injury within minutes – just not to Brownie. This time Howard Jones was hit by figurative lightning on a defensive play in the first inning. Walter slipped over and Nunley entered at third base and hit into a double play right in the bottom of the first. The Coons would end up scoring first after Margolis drew a 1-out walk in the bottom 3rd, Brown bunted him over, and Cookie bounced a ball over the third base bag for a long single that allowed even the lead-footed Margolis to score, but that run didn’t hold up: Eric Paull homered off Brownie in the fourth, tying the game at one. The lead was restored when Shane Walter scored on Bergquist’s RBI triple in the bottom of the inning.

The Crusaders had two infield singles in the top 5th and couldn’t get any of their runners home, before the bottom 5th was led off by Margolis with a single to center. Brown bunted again, and then Cookie reached on an infield single. Nunley hit into his second double play of the game to keep the score at 2-1, with the Crusaders then stranding runners in scoring position in the sixth and seventh, with Durango being left on third base in the latter after a leadoff single when they did not hit for Cruz with two outs. Brown lasted to the eighth, in which Caraballo became the tying run with a 1-out single. Ortíz grounded to Bergquist, who only was able to retire the lead runner and left Ortíz on first base with two outs. With the right-handed Jones up and Brownie seemingly out of gas, Seung-mo Chun appeared, but that prompted the Crusaders to go to B.J. Manfull as pinch-hitter in his usual spot. Hardly any good could come of this, and Manfull made hard contact with the first pitch Chun threw, but he knocked it downwards and it made it to (and knocked back) Bergquist on one very hard hop. Bergquist survived being hit by a school bus AND made the play at first base, ending the inning. No insurance was coming forth; when the Crusaders sent left-handed pinch-hitter Drew Lowe to bat for Paull leading off the top 9th, Ron Thrasher was brought in right away – Chun would have faced Paull before Thrasher would have appeared for the left-handers behind him – and went on to strike out the side to seal Brownie’s eight W of the season. 2-1 Brownies! Carmona 3-3, RBI; Margolis 1-2, BB; Brown 7.2 IP, 6 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 5 K, W (8-5);

The Crusaders briefly considered protesting the game to the league office for reasons of the Raccoons using biological weapons against them, but I was able to point out that there was nothing in the rule book against pickle brine, and the foreign substance was not on Nick Brown’s paws, which had remained above the brine level at all times.

Game 4
NYC: RF Bailey – SS Paull – LF M. Ortíz – 1B Manfull – CF W. Jones – C Lowe – 2B Caraballo – 3B Rivas – P R. McMullen
POR: CF Carmona – 1B Sambrano – SS McKnight – LF DeWeese – 2B Bergquist – 3B Walter – RF Fucito – C Margolis – P Dupes

Dupes’ strong first start was forgotten as soon as he hit Paull with a 2-strike offering, then walked THREE Crusaders in a row. Lowe scored their second run with a sac fly while DeWeese sold out on a Caraballo drive to keep them from blowing the game open in the first inning. This continued in the second inning, with a 1-out walk to the opposing pitcher, another one to Will Bailey, and then a single by Paull to load the bases ahead of the big guns. Ortíz could not find something to hit and walked, pushing home the third run in the game, while Manfull flew to right, where Fucito had one job and still butchered it and dropped the ball. 4-0, and counting. Winston Jones hit an RBI single, and another run scored when Lowe flew out to center. Another 6-0 game in the middle of the second inning, how lovely. Dupes managed to get another walk in to start the third inning, that one to Rivas, before getting yanked after McMullen’s (unsuccessful) bunt. For the third time this week, the Raccoons were into their pen before the conclusion of the third inning. Juan Gallegos managed to make everything worse, getting only one out against four hits and four runs.

Next was John Korb once again, who was charged with an unearned run in the fourth inning after another waste of oxygen, Bergquist, dropped Alex Rivas’ pop to lead off the inning, and Will Bailey plated him with a single. In the fifth, Manfull, Jones, and Lowe loaded the bases with no outs on straight singles before Caraballo unloaded them with a bases-clearing double. McMullen singled (…), Bailey singled, Paull doubled, and we were now out of long men … IN THE FIFTH INNING. The Crusaders were up 17-0 after the inning ended, Sugano allowing another run on a groundout by Ortíz before K’ing Manfull and actually pitching long relief with rousing success (compared to everybody else). Despite the Purple Pests up by seventeen, Will Bailey managed to get tossed after whiffing against Sugano. When McMullen hit DeWeese in the bottom 7th, a riot was near, but nobody was going to support DeWeese in much of anything these days. In a complete cluster**** of a game, Ron Richards pinch-hit for Sugano and singled, Walter walked, and after fouling off three pitches in a full count, Jimmy Fucito hit a ****ing grand slam to dead center. And nobody cared.

Adam Young had pitched in high school and was put onto the mound for the eighth inning. The last Coons position player to pitch in a blowout loss had been Jon Merritt, and he had promptly broken in half doing so. Young actually collected the final six outs without allowing another run, although the Crusaders had them on the corners with one out in the eighth inning. 17-4 Crusaders. Carmona 2-4; Young 2.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 0 K and 1-3; Sugano 2.2 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 3 BB, 3 K;

There were thousands of kids at this Sunday afternoon family promotion game. Half of them were a waste of money, not bothering about the game and instead smearing ice cream everywhere (with a lovely July afternoon that saw up to 54 degrees in Portland), and the other half was crying a river. Talk about hell.

Dupes is headed not only back to AAA after seven walks in 2.1 innings, but also off the 40-man roster. No point in wasting more time with this piece of garbage. The same is true for Juan Gallegos. Onto the dump with that loser!

And they should be glad! If they hadn’t made it onto waivers, Oberst von Lindenthal would have court-martialed them!

In other news

June 28 – ATL LF/CF Marty Reyes (.259, 4 HR, 34 RBI) will miss up to four weeks with a herniated disc.
June 28 – The Miners crunch the Scorpions, 18-5. PIT 1B Dave McCormick (.366, 9 HR, 44 RBI) goes 5-for-6 with a homer and a double and drives in three.
June 30 – The Warriors will have to get through July without RF/LF Mike Bednarski (.285, 5 HR, 31 RBI), who is out with a knee sprain.
July 1 – One for the ages down in Richmond, as the Rebels and Blue Sox engage in a 21-inning, 6 1/2 hour marathon that ends on Lance Tinker’s bases-loaded walk to Simon Morbidelli, walking off the Rebels, 5-4, after 12 consecutive scoreless innings preceding the walkoff.
July 2 – One day after the never-ending game, the Rebels beat the Blue Sox, 2-1, with their only hit being a homer by 3B Blair Harris (.200, 2 HR, 8 RBI). The Blue Sox fail to score despite having eight hits.
July 2 – More bad news in South Dakota, with INF Jamie Wilson (.318, 6 HR, 38 RBI) lost to the Warriors for the season with a ruptured achilles tendon.
July 3 – The Miners’ superstar SS Tom McWhorter (.302, 13 HR, 54 RBI) will miss at least a week with a thumb contusion.
July 3 – WAS SP Brendan Teasdale (5-6, 4.87 ERA) is lost for the season with a torn back muscle.
July 3 – The Cyclones beat the Buffaloes 1-0 on 2B Carlos Martinez’ (.228, 6 HR, 29 RBI) home run.

Complaints and stuff

Garbage week. Period.

The McMullens are not related. They aren’t even of the same race. And Randy McMullen is even older than Sam McMullen (who’s with the Elks, who are next on our plate).

Friday marked the beginning of the international free agent hunt. The soft cap this year will be $388k, and the Raccoons had no limitations this year. We went out and made offers to seven players totaling $475k initially. The absolute biggest slice of the pie is offered to SP Jonathan Benitez right now, a 16-year old Dominican right-hander. He has an absurd slider in his blossoming repertoire, and he’s also a borderline genius with an interest in Astrophysics. While I don’t like smart players (they tend to have opinions), Calderón digs his arsenal. The rest of the money is sprinkled around a bit to a finesse pitcher and various position players, including a slick-fielding Brazilian shortstop who does not know what a bat is, but who would be a no-risk type of investment. We have offered the tiniest piece of pie to him, all of $6,000.

Sunday morning’s special attraction was a pitching lesson by Oberst von Lindenthal for Munroe with the rest of the cast (minus Dupes, who had to prepare for his start) required to attend. I only noticed it when a mild explosion rattled my window. Apparently, Todd had been trying to imbue the real desire to throw a hard fastball into Munroe by pulling the pin off a hand grenade and lobbing it to him. The first three grenades were dummies that only released a bit of smoke, but the fourth one was real, blasted a hole into the backstop in front of the really expensive seats and also shredded the netting. Oh well, three hours to game time – what do we even employ a grounds crew for? Never mind that the explosion sent a dozen professional pitching critters scattering all over the ballpark. Chris Mathis wasn’t located hiding in a closet until the game was in the fifth inning…

AND WASN’T THAT A FUN LITTLE GAME??

Lots of yelling in the clubhouse again, too. I’ve been slipped a note that said that DeWeese had publicly embarrassed Adam Young in front of the entire team by ripping the towel off his waist as he left the showers, exposing him to everybody in the locker room after the Friday game (which had been Munroe’s blowout loss).

To be fair, a lesson for Young was included, allegedly, with DeWeese shouting in his face that THIS was exactly how Young left his team hanging.

Okay, I would do something about this if DeWeese wasn’t right. He might be an asshole after all, but he’s so far always been right. And he could still hit 30 homers if the wind picks it up in the fall.

And if nobody stabs him in the parking lot.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (40-39) @ Canadiens (43-37) – July 4-7, 2016

While I was going to have a lonely and desperate Fourth of July at home in Portland, the Critters had worked their way north into hostile territory to take on the Elks for four games. So far in 2016, they were winless against them, having gotten swept in the first series this year; an unbearable condition that had to remedied immediately! How exactly this would work out I didn’t know, though. The Elks had strong pitching, allowing the third-fewest runs in the Continental League, and were only held back by their eighth-place offense.

Projected matchups:
Hector Santos (8-4, 2.57 ERA) vs. Rod Taylor (12-4, 3.51 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (4-7, 4.18 ERA) vs. Sean Lewis (5-6, 4.48 ERA)
Chris Munroe (2-6, 4.15 ERA) vs. Armando Gonzales (1-3, 6.07 ERA)
Nick Brown (8-5, 2.36 ERA) vs. Samuel McMullen (11-2, 1.75 ERA)

Brownie had the dubious honor to see his team getting shut out on Thursday. The good McMullen is also the Elks’ only left-hander.

Meanwhile, there were some roster changes with Gary Dupes and Juan Gallegos waived and DFA’ed. Will West rejoined the team in the pen, and I had no clue which pitcher to give a start to on Friday between all the depressing non-options. Maybe it’s back to Magnotta… But even then, he wasn’t going to be called up until the team would make it to Boston. Maybe this was the right time to indicate that the chances to see Jonny Toner done the brown cap again this month were not too good.

Lacking any other clever idea, OF Brandon Johnson was dispatched to Vancouver with the team as spare outfielder. He batted .246 in 23 games with the Critters in 2015, but was hitting for a poor .665 OPS in St. Pete this season, which was down a rousing 200 points from his 2015 AAA work. Also keep in mind that we were without Howard Jones, who was in medical limbo still.

Game 1
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – SS McKnight – RF Richards – C Baca – P Santos
VAN: 2B Hilderbrand – RF E. Garcia – 1B Gilbert – LF Cameron – SS Lawrence – CF Rocha – C J. Martinez – 3B Irvin – P R. Taylor

Control issues hadn’t been Santos’ thing in 2016 as he came in with a 6.4 K/BB ratio, which was mildly insane, but the two walks he conceded in the bottom of the second inning, along with Jesus Martinez’ single, loaded the bases for T.J. Hilderbrand, the former Knight, with two outs. Hilderbrand took a 1-2 pitch past Adam Young and into the rightfield corner, emptying the bases and giving the Elks a 3-0 lead. Martinez singled home Mario Rocha in the bottom 4th after Rocha’s leadoff double, and the Elks stranded a pair in scoring position in the inning thanks to some slick defense by Matt Nunley, while Santos’ pitching certainly didn’t live up to the assumed pitching duel for this game. Worse yet, the Raccoons were hitless through four innings against Rod Taylor. Shane Walter’s 1-out double in the sixth was the first hit for the Critters, and he was thrown out by Don Cameron trying to make it a triple, the ****ing dork. Santos went six and two thirds, Beaver collected the last four outs, and Rod Taylor leisurely threw a 2-hit shutout, whiffing seven. 4-0 Canadiens.

Shane Walter has a 10-game hitting streak. I think I will still give him a few strokes with the good belt when I see them in Boston.

Tuesday, the Raccoons DL’ed Howard Jones with a mild shoulder strain. He was going to miss another seven to ten days or so with the injury, and given the All Star break approaching the actual additional games he was going to miss due to being DL’ed would not exceed two or three. He exchanged places with Tom McNeela, who came off the DL, so we now have three catchers, none of whom can hit, and still no offense in general.

Game 2
POR: CF Carmona – SS Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – RF Sambrano – 2B Bergquist – C McNeela – P Abe
VAN: RF K. Evans – LF E. Garcia – 1B Gilbert – CF Cameron – C Little – 3B Fellows – SS Irvin – 2B Hilderbrand – P Lewis

Before Bergquist killed the inning with a double play to Mike Fellows, a 26-year old major league debutee, the Raccoons scored three runs in the first inning, starting with a Cookie single and consecutive doubles by Walter and Nunley. Adam Young singled home Nunley. Abe then put the first two on ahead of Ray Gilbert, but the despised slugger grounded to Walter for a double play and Cameron struck out to end the bottom 1st. Fellows’ first major league at-bat then resulted in a solo homer to cut into the lead in the bottom 2nd (and who hadn’t seen that one coming from far away?)… Abe let go of another run in the third inning, but the Raccoons came back with another crooked number in the fifth. Cookie led off with his third single on the day and stole second base. Walter singled, and Nunley hit a sac fly before Lewis lost control. DeWeese and Young went on with walks before Sandy Sambrano hit a 2-run single to left center. Down 6-2, Lewis’ day was over, but Dustin Burke allowed the two remaining runners to score on Abe’s 2-out, 2-run single: 8-2 halfway through.

Getting Tadasu Abe to a point where he was eligible for a win proved a major task however. The Elks erupted for a counter-crooked number in the bottom 5th. Kurt Evans got on with a single, and Abe balked. Gilbert hit an RBI single (…!), before Cameron hit an RBI triple. Morgan Little scored him with a sac fly to deep left before Fellows popped out on 3-1, which was about the move that saved Abe’s bacon. T.J. Hilderbrand’s double in the bottom 6th knocked him from the game for good, and Sugano allowed the run to score on Evans’ 2-out single to right, bringing the Elks back to 8-6. But Burke was still making an honest effort at long relief, but this was starting to go south in the top 7th. Young singled, Sambrano walked, wild pitch. Intentional walk to Bergquist(!), which loaded the bases and brought up McNeela. With three catchers, you could afford sending somebody else here: Ronnie McKnight grabbed a stick. Burke had now completely lost calibration and walked McKnight on four pitches, none close, 9-6. That was not the last run the Elks walked in in the inning. For once, Fucito drew a bases-loaded walk batting for Sugano, and Chris Spindler, who replaced Burke, continued to struggle. Run-scoring outs by Carmona and Walter were followed by a Nunley single and DeWeese walking, which filled the sacks again. Young came up … and drew another walk, 13-6. Sandy walked, 14-6. It was only when Bergquist popped out that the inning finally ended. And still, the dragon was not slain. Gilbert and Little both homered off Will West in the bottom 7th, bringing the Elks back to 14-8, and with the way the game was going, a comeback was not impossible. And Kurt Evans homered off Thrasher in the bottom 8th, 14-9. Thrasher put two more on before leaving Mathis with the mess. Mathis’ first pitch drilled Little, loading the bases, but he then struck out Fellows to end the inning, and also got through the ninth, somehow. 14-9 Raccoons. Carmona 3-6, RBI; Walter 3-5, 2B, 2 RBI; Nunley 2-5, 2B, 2 RBI; Young 3-4, 2 BB, 2 RBI; Sambrano 2-3, 2 BB, 3 RBI;

Every day that passes that I am involved with these guys, I feel that I know less and less about baseball.

Game 3
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Sambrano – RF Richards – C Baca – 2B Bergquist – P Munroe
VAN: RF K. Evans – LF E. Garcia – 1B Gilbert – CF Cameron – C Little – 3B Fellows – SS Lawrence – 2B Hilderbrand – P A. Gonzales

Munroe started off very loose, walking two in the first inning, but those didn’t score. Nobody scored through three innings, and then it was Ron Richards with a rare 2-out RBI single to actually give the Critters the lead in the top of the fourth. Alas, the lead didn’t last. Morgan Little, who already had decapitated two Raccoons runners in this game, opened the bottom 4th with a double to left, and the Elks kept swinging away. After Jaylin Lawrence had tied the game, Gonzales batted with two outs and laced another double to left to score Lawrence with the go-ahead run – lovely! While the Coons had absolutely nothing going with the sticks, Munroe somehow lumbered on into the seventh inning, but was removed after the inevitable Gilbert hit a 2-out double. Beaver was tasked with Cameron, except that the Elks hit Jesus Martinez for him, who singled and scored Gilbert to run the score to 3-1. The Raccoons faced Pedro Alvarado in the ninth inning and didn’t figure to mount a comeback, but when Ron Richards out of nothing hit a solo shot with one out, they were back to within a run, somehow. Well, there’s being in it, and being in for it. The Coons were the latter; in for two more strikeouts that Alvarado hung on Baca and Young to end the game. 3-2 Canadiens. Carmona 2-4; Richards 2-3, BB, HR, 2 RBI;

Game 4
POR: CF Carmona – LF Sambrano – SS McKnight – 1B Young – 2B Bergquist – 3B Walter – RF Fucito – C Margolis – P Brown
VAN: RF K. Evans – 3B Fellows – 1B Gilbert – C J. Martinez – LF E. Garcia – CF Holland – 2B Roundtree – SS Lawrence – P S. McMullen

Both teams appeared with four left-handed batters in the lineup against the opposing left-handed starter, and a left-handed bat did the first damage in the game, as Shane Walter catapulted a solo shot in the second inning to not only extend his hitting streak to 12 games (he didn’t appear in Wednesday’s contest), but actually Fucito went back-to-back with him to spot Brownie a 2-0 lead after two. Unfortunately Brownie had left his stuff in Portland, and struggled with control as well, which was an unusual thing these days, normally. A leadoff walk to Lawrence in the bottom 3rd became costly when Fellows’ 2-out double brought him in to score and cut the lead in half. Gilbert ripped hard, but flew out to center to end the inning. The next inning, Brown hit Martinez with a 3-2 pitch and allowed a single to Enrique Garcia. Ross Holland hitting into a double play was a major relief and Brown made it out of the inning when Steve Roundtree grounded out to Shane Walter. The Coons got their first runner since the second-inning double-whammy when Cookie walked in the sixth (…!) but was promptly caught stealing. Fellows drew a leadoff walk in the bottom of the inning, but Brown, who was hardly ahead of any batter in these middle innings and whiffed nobody, got two pops to infielders (including one from Gilbert) and made it out of that slow-motion mess, too.

Then came the seventh inning. Sam McMullen was still pitching a 2-hitter, though behind, and the Raccoons’ next runner was Adam Young making it on base only on Roundtree’s throwing error with one out in the inning. Bergquist singled, putting runners on the corners for Walter, who hit one to deep center, but not good enough to beat Gold Glover Ross Holland – it was a sac fly, though, giving the Raccoons a breather. Bergquist then took off with stealing intention, Martinez’ throw was terrible and as the ball skipped to center, Bergquist doodled over to third base, from where Jimmy Fucito plated him with a single to center, 4-1. Brownie got three grounders in the bottom 7th before being hit for in the next inning. Sugano got two outs in the eighth, Mathis got Fellows, and then also retired Gilbert to start the ninth, a grounder to Sambrano at short. Then he walked Martinez, and that got Thrasher involved, with two left-handers following him. If Martinez had been retired, Mathis would have remained in for the 4-out save, but now I wanted Thrasher as long as the tying run was not in the box. Garcia’s grounder to third got Martinez erased at second base, but the return throw was well late. Thrasher then walked Holland, with Brownie being clearly visible in the dugout gnawing on his cap. Morgan Little hit for Roundtree, but struck out, ending this series with a split. 4-1 Brownies! Fucito 2-3, HR, 2 RBI; Brown 7.0 IP, 3 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 3 BB, 1 K, W (9-5);

We had to get Jeff Magnotta onto the roster (sadly), so Tom McNeela was returned to St. Petersburg after the conclusion of this series. He had already cleared waivers in April, so this was a free move.

Raccoons (42-41) @ Titans (43-37) – July 8-10, 2016

For reasons unknown, the Raccoons were unable to compete with the Titans in 2016, having dropped all but two of the nine games played. Boston ranked seventh in runs scored, but tenth in runs allowed. They were last in on-base percentage, had no power, no speed, and still out-scored the Coons by 42 runs.

The Titans made a trade just before the first game, sending OF Bob Arnold Jr. (.215, 0 HR, 9 RBI) and a mild prospect to the Condors for RF Ezra Branch (.284, 11 HR, 40 RBI) and cash.

Projected matchups:
Jeff Magnotta (0-1, 9.64 ERA) vs. Scott Spears (6-4, 2.89 ERA)
Hector Santos (8-5, 2.74 ERA) vs. Kevin Poisson (3-7, 5.20 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (5-7, 4.49 ERA) vs. Jose Fuentes (0-5, 5.54 ERA)

One more southpaw before the break, and it’s Poisson. That one is not pronounced “poison”. He’s Canadian and miffed if you don’t call him “po-saw”. GET THAT POISON GUY, BOYS!

If at all possible, we will hold Santos a bit shorter in this start, which comes three days ahead of the All Star game, and I consider him a candidate to go there. We can not skip him, though, the overall coverage is too thin. If we could couple John Korb, who did not appear in the Canadiens series, with him on Saturday, that would be awesome, but you’re hesitant if it’s a 2-1 game or something like that.

Game 1
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – SS McKnight – RF Richards – C Baca – P Magnotta
BOS: SS M. Rivera – 2B J. Gutierrez – 1B S. Butler – C T. Robinson – RF Branch – 3B T. Thomas – LF Mata – CF Blake – P Spears

Mike Rivera hit Magnotta’s first pitch for a triple, and the Titans immediately piled on him. Ezra Branch’s first Titans at-bat was a 3-run homer, putting them 4-0 ahead, and the season-long rout of the Critters continued. One of those runs was unearned after a Nunley error, and in the third inning Cookie dropped a ball for an error that eventually made all three runs in the inning unearned, but honestly somebody also allowed the nine hits the Titans had in those three innings. Meanwhile, a 36-year old Scott Spears, who hadn’t set the world on fire as a 32-year old Raccoon some years back, was working on a no-hitter. He then walked McKnight and Richards in the fifth, only for Baca to hit into a double play. Somehow Magnotta made it through five innings in another rampantly depressing game, before Fucito batted for him leading off the sixth and got tattooed by Spears. Cookie warded off another nonsense George Kirk-type no-hitter when he legged out an infield single to follow that free runner, and Nunley then hit a proper single to load the bases. DeWeese drew a bases-loaded walk, Young hit a sac fly, McKnight singled to reload the bases and Richards forced in another run with another bases-loaded walk, but when Baca grounded out it still left the Coons four runs shy, but instead of continuing to get closer, they fell further behind when the Titans scored another run on Fucito’s throwing error in the bottom of the seventh inning. We got two runs off Tommy Briggs late, but it was too little, and indeed too late. 8-5 Titans. Carmona 2-5; McKnight 2-3, BB; Sugano 1.2 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 2 K;

We had seven hits and made four errors. Combined with that incredible draft bust on the mound I am very surprised we didn’t lose by a dozen. In any case, Walter lost his 13-game hitting streak.

Game 2
POR: CF Carmona – SS Sambrano – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – RF Fucito – 1B Young – 2B Bergquist – C Margolis – P Santos
BOS: SS M. Rivera – 2B J. Gutierrez – 1B S. Butler – C T. Robinson – RF Branch – 3B T. Thomas – LF O. Thompson – CF Mata – P Poisson

DeWeese loudly moaned about being protected only by a half-eaten yogurt in today’s lineup, but still hit a 2-run homer in the first inning after Nunley ahead of him got clipped. The Titans got two singles to start their half of the first inning, but then had Steve Butler ground out to Young and Santos struck out Tim Robinson and Ezra Branch. The Titans made up a run in the bottom 2nd, and once again it was a pitcher getting a 2-out hit, Poisson singling home Tom Thomas, who had opened the inning with a double. Santos went on to drill Mike Rivera before Jose Gutierrez grounded out. After a few calm innings, the Critters would have a badly struggling Margolis on base with a leadoff double in the fifth, but nobody could be bothered to score him. DeWeese hit a 1-out double in the sixth and advanced on Fucito’s infield single. Young hit one to center that fell in just a few feet in front of the hustling Alex Mata, scoring DeWeese with the Coons’ third run of the game.

Santos was on 71 pitches through five, and with the All Star Game in mind, we would not want him to go much past 80. Or not at all. Steve Butler’s leadoff single in the bottom 6th was the beginning of the end for him, and he only logged Robinson’s following pop before departing with 79 pitches. Ron Thrasher came out with a significant left-handed smell to the lineup and got five outs from five batters, while the Coons gained a run on Sambrano’s RBI single off Harry Merwin (though the run was charged to Poisson). Cookie scored, having been walked intentionally after McKnight’s leadoff double in the seventh, but McKnight was then thrown out on a double steal attempt. John Korb then pitched a scoreless bottom 8th before Jayden Reed made a mess in the top of the ninth. Cookie singled with one out before Reed walked both Sambrano and Nunley, though something was off with him as the Titans trainer then hauled him in. Tommy Briggs, who had lost a few more feathers in the series opener, appeared to face R.J. DeWeese, which was begging for trouble. Briggs, with the ERA over six and throwing right-handed, hit DeWeese at 1-1, which prompted DeWeese to point his bat at him and bark whether he wanted to have his head taken off. The home plate umpire had a hard time getting him up the first base line, Cookie scored, and no war broke out. Fucito flew out to shallow left, but Young scored two with a single past second baseman Robby Vasquez. At that point, Korb remained in the game as his turn at-bat came up, flew out to right to end the inning, but then pitched another scoreless inning to beat the Titans. 7-1 Coons. DeWeese 2-4, HR, 2B, 3 RBI; Fucito 3-5; Young 2-5, 3 RBI; Richards (PH) 1-1; McKnight 1-2, 2B; Santos 5.1 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 5 K, W (9-5); Thrasher 1.2 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K; Korb 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 2 K, SV (1);

Not too bad for a half-eaten yogurt!

Also, lo and behold, the Raccoons made it to 11th in runs scored with this contest. 328 runs from 85 games was just good enough to pass the Indians (326 runs in 87 games).

Game 3
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – SS McKnight – RF Richards – C Baca – P Abe
BOS: SS M. Rivera – LF M. Pruitt – 1B S. Butler – C T. Robinson – RF Branch – 3B T. Thomas – 2B Vasquez – CF Blake – P Fuentes

Cookie started the game with a groundout. It was the last out that Fuentes recorded before striking out Abe, with all seven Coons in between either singling or walking, which gave them a 4-0 lead and the bases loaded with Cookie appearing again, and he wasn’t going to make two outs in the first inning: he singled sharply to right, just good enough to score two and give his team a 6-0 lead before Walter flew out to Matt Pruitt. This one was Abe’s to lose, and he went to work immediately, putting Rivera on with a leadoff single in the bottom 1st and conceding the run on Butler’s double, and Butler hit a 2-run homer in the bottom 3rd, then collecting Pruitt, who was batting .318 in 129 at-bats when he came up in the bottom 4th with the bases loaded and two outs. Yes, Abe was actually that bad. Oberst von Lindenthal went out to inform him that the drumheads were ready for him if he botched this 6-0 lead, which did little to encourage him. Pruitt hit a 2-run single to center, Butler hit an RBI single to right, we were tied, and Abe was gonna be fried.

Will West inherited this horrendous botch job of a game, got a grounder from Robinson to Nunley for the last out, and four innings in we were reset and even. Top 6th, Brett Dill pitching for Boston. Richards led off with a double before Baca walked. Nobody out, Brandon Johnson hit for West and struck a single to right to load the bags. The Titans had already burned their southpaws, so this was all Dill’s mess. Cookie was up and hit a ball to left center. The ball kept stretching and escaped Jonathan Blake’s range, bouncing in for a 2-run double which broke the tie and put Will West in line for an 8-6 lead. Walter K’ed, Nunley walked, DeWeese rocked a fastball to right for another two runs, ending Dill’s unfortunate outing. Ron Sakellaris took over a 10-6 bushfire, balked, but did not concede another run after Young was walked intentionally, McKnight popped out, and Richards flew out more or less right to Blake in center. We still had 12 outs to get, though, and the Titans immediately made a run at Kevin Beaver. Rivera singled, Pruitt singled, but Rivera was then caught stealing third, and that took the air out of the rally, Beaver escaping on Cookie shagging Butler’s deep drive, and Robinson grounding out to short. Compared to all the drama so far, the game was rather dull afterwards until Thrasher took the ball in a non-save situation (10-6) in the ninth. Steve Butler hit a 1-out single, and while Robinson struck out, Ezra Branch hit a double to right center that scored Butler, and made it to third base when the ball got lost on the infield. Tom Thomas grounded sharply to third base, where his significant other Matt Nunley intercepted the bouncer and threw to first in time to end the first half of the season with a W. 10-7 Raccoons. Carmona 2-5, 2B, 4 RBI; Nunley 2-4, BB; DeWeese 2-5, 2 RBI; Richards 2-4, 2B, RBI; Sambrano (PH) 1-1; Beaver 2.1 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K;

In other news

July 4 – The Cyclones acquire SP Gavin French (5-7, 2.98 ERA) from the Gold Sox for two prospects, including #84 prospect SP Alejandro Purcella.
July 7 – NAS SP Joe Medina (9-7, 3.57 ERA) 2-hits the Cyclones in a 9-0 shutout.
July 7 – Just having added to their pitching, the Cyclones lose CL Juan Jimenez (4-3, 4.12 ERA, 18 SV) to a torn labrum. The 32-year old southpaw is out for the season.
July 7 – Veterans are exchanged between the Aces and Scorpions. 1B Tony Ramos (.272, 6 HR, 40 RBI) is traded to Las Vegas, while Sacramento receives RF/LF Bill Miller (.280, 5 HR, 36 RBI). Miller is already 35, Ramos will be in six months.
July 8 – Tied at seven after 12 innings, the Miners’ five runs in the top 13th beat the Cyclones’ two in the bottom to secure a 12-9 win. The Cyclones out-hit the Miners in the game, 20-18.
July 9 – The Warriors pick up CF Roberto Pena (.357, 0 HR, 3 RBI), who was injured for much of the season so far, from the Gold Sox, who receive 2B Dave Fletcher (.321, 6 HR, 21 RBI).
July 10 – MIL OF/2B Victor Enriquez (.254, 12 HR, 45 RBI) is out for the season with a torn labrum.

Complaints and stuff

Ron Richards called me in Portland on Wednesday morning demanding to be traded. While doubtlessly something was going on in Elkland that I didn’t want to know about, there was also the undisputable fact that as soon as he was out of the lineup the Coons emptied a 14-run bucket on the Elks, and also the sad reality that he was vastly and ghastly overpaid and nobody would trade for him.

Speaking about the clubhouse, Todd von Lindenthal let me know that Manobu Sugano had formally filed a complaint about somebody having filled all his socks with rice. Maybe, just maybe, things were getting out of hand with the guys…

Nick Brown has reached 125 innings at the All Star break, which is as good a point as any to remind our following that he has a vesting option for 2017 that requires him to pitch 190 innings, and which is worth $1.8M. At his pace he would actually far surpass that mark. But we haven’t had any hamstring incidents yet…

We signed our first international youngster by Monday, adding 18-year old Brazilian shortstop Daniel Bullock (long story with that name; we’ll tell it once he’s off to his first All Star game) for a meager six grand. During the week we went on to add 16-yr old Dominicans 1B Manuel Cardona ($40k), C Marco Vallejo ($38k), SP Juan Mendez ($18k), and CF Danny Torres ($15k). We dropped one player from the shopping list, and the only other guy we’re after now is SP Jonathan Benitez, yet another 16-year old Dominican player. (He claims to be 16. He also sports a full beard…) We have reached a point in the bidding where if we sign him we will be far over the soft cap and will onyl be able to sign third-rate internationals next year.

[Westheim]

All Star Game

Despite a record of wild mediocrity in 2016, the Raccoons somehow managed to get five players onto the CL’s All Star roster. To nobody’s great surprise, three of those were starting pitchers: Brownie, Santos, and Jonny Toner, who was going to be a non-participant due to injury. For Brownie, it was his eighth nomination, while for Santos and Toner it was the third (all consecutive) for both of them. The other two nominees were our two recent Rookies of the Year, Ronnie McKnight and Matt Nunley. Both made the roster the first time.

The game itself was not a good advertisement for the Raccoons or the Continental League. The latter managed only two hits in the entire game and lost 3-2 to the Federal League, which had ten hits. Matt Nunley and Ronnie McKnight both went 0-for-4 in the game. Nick Brown and Hector Santos both pitched an inning; Brownie allowed a run on three hits, while Santos was unscored upon. Despite playing on the losing team, VAN 1B Ray Gilbert won MVP honors with a home run and a walk in two plate appearances.

Raccoons (44-42) vs. Canadiens (48-39) – July 14-17, 2016

Eighth in runs scored, fourth in runs allowed, the Elks were still 10 1/2 games behind the Crusaders. They had swept the Loggers quite forcefully on the weekend before the All Star Game. Overall, the season series stood 5-2 in favor of the pink guys.

Projected matchups:
Chris Munroe (2-7, 4.14 ERA) vs. Rod Taylor (14-4, 3.20 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (5-7, 4.85 ERA) vs. Sean Lewis (6-7, 4.73 ERA)
Nick Brown (9-5, 2.30 ERA) vs. TBD
Hector Santos (9-5, 2.69 ERA) vs. TBD

We start with two right-handed opponents. Southpaw Sam McMullen (11-3, 1.78 ERA) started the All Star Game and threw 15 pitches, and I expect him to pitch at some point this weekend. One of Bill King (3-8, 3.96 ERA) and Armando Gonzales (2-3, 5.03 ERA) will fill out the rotation.

Brown threw 23 pitches on Tuesday and will have three days’ rest. Santos threw 16 pitches and goes on four days’ / regular rest. Abe also pitches on regular rest.

Game 1
VAN: RF K. Evans – LF E. Garcia – 1B Gilbert – C Little – 3B Fellows – CF Holland – SS Irvin – 2B Hilderbrand – P R. Taylor
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – SS McKnight – RF Richards – C Baca – P Munroe

The game was scoreless through four innings, which was also how long it took the Critters to get a hit against Rod Taylor. Adam Young had a 2-out single that sent Nunley, who had walked, to third base. McKnight sent one deep to center, but Ross Holland just barely made it there and ended the inning with a nice grab. Munroe, while not perfect, had so far held the Elks to two hits and three runners in total, but was almost done in with consecutive walks to Jeremiah Irvin and T.J. Hilderbrand at the start of the fifth inning. After an obvious bunt, Kurt Evans’ foul pop, and Richards spoiling Enrique Garcia’s drive to right, the game remained scoreless. The Elks loaded them up in the sixth when – with one out – Morgan Little singled, Mike Fellows was hit, and Holland walked. Irvin lined out to McKnight for the second out before Hilderbrand popped out to Shane Walter. Munroe got a K from Taylor to start the seventh, which was a job well done and a well-maintained no-decision for him. Sugano then appeared, walked Evans, and departed when Jesus Martinez hit for Garcia. Chun got a groundout from him, which moved the runner to second and took the base out of the hands of Ray Gilbert, owner of the country’s leading coonskinnery. He was walked intentionally to get to Morgan Little, who struck out. With Young on second and one out, the Elks bypassed Richards for whatever reason to get the last two outs of the bottom 7th from Baca and Fucito then. Still no score, and that didn’t change in regulation. The Coons couldn’t drink a glass of water against Taylor, but both teams amounted only to three hits each in nine innings. The Coons would only get one more hit, a leadoff single by DeWeese in the bottom 12th, but truth be told, the Elks also only got one more hit and made it count. It was the most stupid kind of hit: closer Pedro Alvarado romped a leadoff double off Kevin Beaver in the top of the 12th inning, and scored on productive outs by Evans and Mario Rocha. The Raccoons never got DeWeese off first base. 1-0 Canadiens. Young 2-5; Munroe 6.1 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 4 BB, 4 K and 1-2; Thrasher 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 3 K;

Oy.

Game 2
VAN: RF K. Evans – LF E. Garcia – 1B Gilbert – C Little – CF Cameron – 3B Fellows – SS Lawrence – 2B Hilderbrand – P King
POR: CF Carmona – SS Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – RF Richards – 2B Sambrano – C Baca – P Abe

In a display of everything wrong with the Raccoons, the game opened with a 2-base throwing error by Sambrano on Evans’ grounder, Abe hitting Garcia and throwing a wild pitch, and then Gilbert gave them a lead with sac fly. The run was unearned – whether that was too mild on Abe would probably be the point of an interesting discussion. The Coons opened their first inning with three straight singles, which scored Cookie to tie the game, before the middle of the order collectively funked out with DeWeese’s fly out and two K’s. The Coons would not have another hit through five, and the Elks had only one, an Enrique Garcia single in the third, but Morgan Little came through for them in the sixth, plating Evans, who had drawn a leadoff walk, with a 2-out single to put the Elks up 2-1. Less than five minutes later, Little was responsible for DeWeese moving from second to third with one out on a passed ball. DeWeese had singled in Walter to tie the game after Walter’s leadoff double in the bottom 6th, but neither Young nor Richards could get the ****ing stick up to bring home DeWeese. Abe went on to pitch nine innings, allowing only three hits and no more runs. The bottom 9th started with left-hander Aurelio Garcia pitching, who had already thrown 1 1/3 innings. He got three more outs from pinch-hitters McKnight and Fucito as well as Sambrano. Taylor had thrown 9 1/3 innings in the series opener, and the Coons sent out Abe for the tenth again, coming in on 101 pitches, and despite a leadoff walk to PH Jesus Martinez the Elks could not break through, hitting into two force outs before Steve Roundtree was caught stealing by Alonso Baca. Beaver followed with two scoreless, the Coons still couldn’t hit a lick, and Sugano was overwhelmed in the top 13th with a 2-out double by Roundtree and a subsequent RBI single by Irvin. Margolis hit for Baca to start the bottom 13th against Orlando Valdez and found the gap for a double, the Coons’ first hit in extra innings. Bergquist popped out, and Cookie and Walter both grounded out to first base, ending the game in another bitter defeat. 3-2 Canadiens. Walter 2-6, 2B; Margolis (PH) 1-1, 2B; Abe 10.0 IP, 3 H, 2 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 5 K and 1-3; Beaver 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 1 K;

Okay, this is like watching old people clip their nails. Naked.

Game 3
VAN: RF K. Evans – 3B Fellows – 1B Gilbert – C J. Martinez – LF E. Garcia – 2B Hilderbrand – CF Rocha – SS Lawrence – P Lewis
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – SS McKnight – RF Fucito – C Baca – P Brown

Brownie had two strikeouts in the first, Evans and Gilbert, while Fellows singled and was thrown out by Baca when he tried to steal second base. The Elks had two on in the second with no outs, results of a leadoff single by Martinez and a walk to Garcia, but Brown whiffed the next two and got Lawrence to foul out. Himself he would come up with the bases loaded and one out in the bottom 2nd – Young and McKnight had singled while Baca walked – and while he didn’t get the ball past Gilbert, he at least gave the team the first lead in the series with a run-scoring groundout. The 1-0 lead didn’t stand up; the Elks had two hits while Gilbert got nicked in the top 3rd and pulled the run right back. The Elks lost their starter Sean Lewis to injury in the third inning, and Dustin Burke took over, who had more walks than strikeouts in his 20 innings of work this season. The Coons couldn’t hurt him, and Brownie was all done after six innings with six strikeouts and many long counts, the game still tied 1-1. But hey, there was another chance for his tenth win of the season, if the Raccoons could get a run home against Frank Yeager, another pretty bad right-hander with an ERA close to seven. DeWeese hit a single, and that was all. Brown were left with a no-decision. John Korb managed another scoreless inning after that, but the Elks then blasted through Seung-mo Chun for two runs in the eighth, and three runs off Will West in the ninth, including three doubles off the walls. The Coons couldn’t find their bare asses even with a map and a flashlight and lost miserably once again. 6-1 Canadiens. Brown 6.0 IP, 7 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 6 K;

Well, that’s three runs in 34 innings. Let me briefly check the conditions on my life insurance policy…

In the meantime, Howard Jones came off the DL and rejoined the roster. Brandon Johnson, who had appeared in five games with as many at-bats and only one hit, was reassigned to St. Petersburg.

Game 4
VAN: RF K. Evans – LF E. Garcia – 1B Gilbert – CF Cameron – C Little – 3B Fellows – 2B Lawrence – SS Irvin – P McMullen
POR: CF Carmona – 3B Jones – SS McKnight – LF DeWeese – RF Fucito – 1B Young – 2B Bergquist – C Margolis – P Santos

Cookie was on third base in the first inning (after a dire 1-for-a-million output so far in the series) with a single and his 16th stolen base, but DeWeese struck out to end the inning. While Santos was holding the Elks hitless early on, the Coons had another man on third base in the bottom 3rd. Margolis had hit a leadoff double to left, and Cookie reached with an infield single that moved Margolis along. Jones struck out, McKnight grounded out to short, and once again we didn’t have ****. The Elks’ first hit would be Gilbert’s 22nd homer of the season, a 2-shot off Santos in the fourth that was half unearned after Garcia had reached on a DeWeese error.

Bottom 5th: Bergquist hit a leadoff double, after which the hard failing began again. It was only Cookie with two outs that moved Bergquist to third base with his third single of the day. Jones flew out to Evans in right, and the fans openly showed their dismay by now. The Critters got a free runner in the seventh when McMullen, who was not sparkling, but perfectly competent, hit Bergquist with one out. Margolis didn’t want to play in easy mode and hit squarely to short for a double play. Santos broke down in the eighth after seven very good innings, allowed leadoff singles to Fellows and Lawrence and continued with a walk to Martinez. Nobody out, but three on, and three left-handers up starting with Ross Holland who hit for McMullen, bringing Ron Thrasher in was like begging for it, but only one run scored on Holland’s groundout before Evans whiffed and Garcia grounded out to Young. But that was still a 3-0 lead for the Elks and the Coons had barely scored three runs in the entire ****ing series. The Elks got greedy though. They pitched Yeager in the 3-0 game, and Cookie had his fourth hit on the day (the entire rest of the team combined for two) with a 1-out single in the bottom 8th, and FINALLY FINALLY FINALLY somebody came through: Ronnie McKnight hit a 2-run homer, and the Raccoons were back in business. DeWeese reached on Jaylin Lawrence’s error, but Richards grounded out in place of Fucito. Mathis held the Elks pinned in the ninth, and we faced Alvarado in the bottom 9th, starting with Young, who hit the first pitch to deep center, but not past Don Cameron. Bergquist grounded to third base, and Mike Fellows threw the ball away, putting the tying run on second base with one out! Margolis whiffed, though, and that brought up Nunley, who had pinch-hit and remained on third base the last time through. He cracked a ball to first base, where T.J. Hilderbrand was simply beat – Nunley tied the score with a 2-out double, and now came Cookie, undenied so far, who wrestled a walk from Alvarado. Walter walked batting for Mathis in the #2 hole, but McKnight struck out – extra innings … again…….

Top 10th, Korb allowed a leadoff double to Lawrence. Alvarado, who had already instituted a Coons loss in the series with a double, hit an infield single and stole second base, which made a right mockery out of the game. Evans grounded out to Nunley for the second out, but Enrique Garcia dumped a single into shallow left to plate both runners, and the Raccoons drowned once again – despite tying the game in the bottom 10th off Alvarado. DeWeese singled, Richards homered (!), and then Bergquist and Margolis hit singles, but the previous inning’s hero, Matt Nunley, hit into a double play to kill the inning. Young killed the 12th with another double play, and Seung-mo Chun yielded a run on a Hilderbrand double in the top 13th to put the Elks ahead once more. Dustin Burke remained in the game after pitching three innings on 22 pitches, and sawed off the Coons in due time in the bottom 13th, retiring Bergquist, Margolis, and Nunley in order. 6-5 Canadiens. Carmona 4-5, BB; McKnight 2-6, HR, 2 RBI; Richards 2-3, HR, 2 RBI; Bergquist 2-5, 2B; Margolis 2-6, 2B; Santos 7.0 IP, 4 H, 3 R, 2 ER, 1 BB, 5 K;

Kill me.

Raccoons (44-46) @ Indians (45-47) – July 18-20, 2016

The two worst offensive arrays in the league would poke against another in futility once more, with the Indians having jumped the Critters again after their disastrous showing against Vancouver. The Indians were also fourth in runs allowed, with the second-best bullpen in the Continental League. They were up in the season series, 5-4 over the Raccoons.

Projected matchups:
Jeff Magnotta (0-2, 7.45 ERA) vs. Kyle Lamb (1-4, 4.95 ERA)
Chris Munroe (2-7, 3.86 ERA) vs. Alejando Mendez (7-9, 3.95 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (5-7, 4.50 ERA) vs. Dan Lambert (5-6, 3.61 ERA)

The series starts with a southpaw, and – breaking news! – the Raccoons will NOT see Tom Weise (9-8, 4.11 ERA), which hasn’t happened in like forever.

In encouraging news, Jonny Toner was assigned to AAA for two rehab starts, so we might not have to bear Magnotta all that often going forwards.

Game 1
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Sambrano – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – RF Fucito – 1B A. Young – SS Jones – C Margolis – P Magnotta
IND: LF Baker – SS Matias – RF Gilmor – 2B Kym – CF J. Wilson – 1B S. Guerra – C Denny – 3B Tolwith – P Lamb

While the Raccoons somehow managed to scratch out a run in the third inning (Nunley sac fly), Magnotta genuinely failed his way through the first four innings with horrendous pitching, a few doubles, bad counts, and was time and again bailed out by the defense. In the fifth, the score was still 1-0, and he opened the inning with walks to Mike Denny and Aaron Tolwith. This was a tough one to get out of, but then Kyle Lamb laid down the most horrendous bunt in history, which jumped more or less right into Margolis’ throwing hand after a bounce, Margolis rocketed the ball to third base to kill off the lead-footed Denny, and Nunley, who had read the play well and had dropped back, fired to first to also get the pitcher. Tolwith, the old Logger, remained at second with two outs, so of course Magnotta allowed a hard single to left center to Josh Baker that tied the game. Magnotta at least made it through seven to protect a mangled bullpen, which saw scoreless innings by Sugano and Thrasher before the Coons had to depart for their fourth extra inning game in five days because they couldn’t score a single ****ing run. Sambrano hit a double in the 10th and was stranded, after which Mathis loaded the bases in the bottom 10th not solely with his own failure. With Joey Mathews and Raul Matias on base, Nick Gilmor hit a perfect double play ball to McKnight at short, but McKnight blew it and the bases were loaded with one out. The Indians walked off three pitches later when Jong-beom Kym hit a sac fly. 2-1 Indians. Sambrano 2-5, 2B; Nunley 2-5, RBI; Walter (PH) 1-1; Magnotta 7.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 3 BB, 1 K;

Well, this is starting to get really ugly. We might want to look into folding because I can’t stand the thought of seeing them **** up like that for another 71 games.

Game 2
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – SS McKnight – RF Richards – C Baca – P Munroe
IND: LF Baker – C Padilla – RF Gilmor – 2B Kym – CF J. Wilson – 1B S. Guerra – SS Matias – 3B Mathews – P A. Mendez

For four innings, all the offense the Raccoons had was Cookie Carmona, who singled twice, which didn’t get us anywhere since he was wrapped up in Shane Walter’s double play grounder the first time and was caught stealing my the soft-armed Dave Padilla the second time. Gilmor and Kym were on base with singles in the first inning, but didn’t score either, and the first run didn’t get onto the board until the fifth inning, when DeWeese put the Coons 1-0 ahead with a leadoff jack. 1-0 leads hardly ever stood up, and this was no exception. A leadoff walk to Josh Baker in the bottom 6th opened an unholy box; Baker moved up on Padilla’s groundout, and scored on Gilmor’s single to right. Munroe held up for seven innings before Padilla’s leadoff single in the bottom 8th got him removed in favor of the Beaver, with right-hander Mike Denny pinch-hitting for Gilmor. Denny hit into a double play, but Kym bombed Beaver with a shot to left, giving the Indians a 2-1 lead, which the Coons were in no condition to make up. Sandy Sambrano had a pinch-hit single to start the ninth, but was forced out by Cookie. Worse yet, Walter hit into his second double play of the night. 2-1 Indians. Carmona 2-4; Sambrano (PH) 1-1; Munroe 7.0 IP, 7 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 4 K;

What a – … we have now scored ten runs since the All Star break. In six games. Ten runs. In six games.

Somehow, I have no clue how and why, R.J. DeWeese has a 10-game hitting streak, however. I hope he didn’t expect any congratulations from his team mates, but Oberst von Lindenthal told me that somebody had used lipstick to smear “**** YOU” on his favorite T-shirt in the locker room during the game.

Game 3
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 2B Jones – 1B Sambrano – C Baca – P Abe
IND: LF Baker – C Padilla – RF Gilmor – 2B Kym – CF J. Wilson – 1B S. Guerra – SS Matias – 3B Tolwith – P Lambert

The Coons started like lightning with a first inning run, Nunley doubling home Cookie. DeWeese extended his streak to 11 games with a third-inning double which came an inning too late to do something about the walks that Lambert had issued to Jones and Baca in the second. The Indians even drew three walks off Abe in the bottom of the third, including Lambert drawing one to start the inning (…), but John Wilson grounded out to Howard Jones to thwart that golden opportunity. Abe also had five strikeouts in three innings, which combined with the walks had served to explode his pitch count to 64 early on, and he made all the way to 90 pitches through five innings, which however went over scoreless for him, despite the befuddling inability to keep Dan Lambert off the bases. To be fair, Abe also hit an inconsequential 2-out double off Lambert in the fourth inning, which only served to set up Cookie to fly out to left with Abe and Baca (who had walked) in scoring position. The Raccoons then actually opened their can of runs again in the sixth inning, scoring a rousing TWO runs in one stroke by Alonso Baca, who buried a tame fastball in the rightfield stands for a 2-run home run, collecting Sambrano for a 3-0 lead. The Indians hadn’t threatened since the first inning and went down with two strikeouts and no runners in the sixth, Abe’s last inning. After that, Korb, Sugano, and Thrasher pitched hitless relief to end a 6-game spill for the Coons. 3-0 Blighters. Carmona 2-4; Baca 1-1, 2 BB, HR, 2 RBI; Abe 6.0 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 3 BB, 7 K, W (6-7) and 1-3, 2B;

Raccoons (45-48) @ Thunder (40-54) – July 22-24, 2016

No Thunder team had *ever* finished a season with a .426 win percentage or worse; they had *always* won at least 71 games for a .438 clip. But not only were they in last, they were also on pace for less than 70 wins for the first time in franchise history. Their offense was meager, ranking 10th in runs scored (Coons: guess where…), while the pitching was average, with the sixth-least runs allowed. The rotation was so-so, the pen was rather good. The Coons were 2-1 against them this season.

Projected matchups:
Nick Brown (9-5, 2.27 ERA) vs. Ray Taylor (4-4, 4.04 ERA)
Hector Santos (9-5, 2.69 ERA) vs. Ted McKenzie (3-10, 7.00 ERA)
Jeff Magnotta (0-2, 4.86 ERA) vs. Jorge Gine (9-5, 2.54 ERA)

The Thunder had an off day as well and could skip McKenzie to bring their only southpaw into the series, 6-8, 3.22 ERA Ed Michaels.

Game 1
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B A. Young – C Baca – RF Richards – 2B Jones – P Brown
OCT: 2B A. Rodriguez – LF L. Taylor – 1B B. Thomas – CF S. Young – 3B J. Soto – SS Farias – RF V. Diaz – C D. Anderson – P Ra. Taylor

Howard Jones hit his first home run as a Raccoon in the second inning, a 3-run shot to left to also plate Baca and Richards, who had hit 2-out singles. The damage to Ray Taylor could have been greater if Adam Young hadn’t hit into a double play to erase Taylor’s leadoff walk to DeWeese. Nick Brown had little flash, but got the ball on the ground. Unfortunately, his first two pitches in the second inning resulted in singles by Jesus Soto and Emilio Farias through the seams of the infield, and Soto came in to score on Vinny Diaz’ groundout, immediately reducing the lead to 3-1.

The middle innings breezed by without any team doing damage to the other. The Coons excelled in bringing up Brownie with two on and two out, which they did twice, and he failed both times, ironically after hitting a single in his first at-bat of the game. Danger only was generated when Cookie opened the seventh inning with a triple to right center, which scared the Thunder enough to move to the bullpen, from where they brought in left-hander Bryan Robbins, who had a K/BB of almost four and a decent sub-3 ERA. This was probably going to be another one of those situations where three consecutive batters would fail to plate a runner from third base. Time for a shakeup: Bergquist hit for McKnight – and was walked intentionally! Nunley grounded out, moving Bergquist to second, but that left DeWeese, the King of K’s, in the line of fire against Robbins. He put the ball in play, however, sending a liner to center that Sean Young caught with some difficulty, and Cookie scored on the sac fly, 4-1. The Thunder infield came then apart with a pair of 2-out infield singles by Young and Fucito, the latter scoring Bergquist to get to 5-1 before Richards grounded out. Diaz tried to retaliate against Brownie, leading off the bottom 7th with an infield single, but Brownie struck out Daryl Anderson and Jesus Flores before Armando Rodriguez hit a ball to deep center – but Cookie was there to make the play. Brownie went on to pitch eight innings, and Mathis sealed the deal with a perfect ninth. 5-1 Brownies! Carmona 2-5, 3B; Young 2-5; Baca 2-3; Fucito (PH) 1-1, RBI; Richards 2-3; Brown 8.0 IP, 6 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 7 K, W (10-5) and 1-4;

This was Brownie’s 210th career win. In terms of strikeouts, he stands at 3,065 – with Pancho Trevino having approached to be within 29 strikeouts of him.

DeWeese ended his 11-game hitting streak. Somebody left a note in his locker that read “Ha-hah!” …

Game 2
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B A. Young – 2B Walter – RF Richards – C Margolis – P Santos
OCT: CF S. Young – 2B Farias – 1B B. Thomas – C Parks – LF L. Taylor – 3B J. Soto – SS Janes – RF J. Flores – P T. McKenzie

Jalen Park’s throwing error on Cookie’s and McKnight’s double steal attempt in the first inning helped the Raccoons to a 2-run first. Cookie scored outright, and McKnight came home on Nunley’s groundout. The Raccoons even got a third stolen base in the inning when DeWeese singled and successfully took second, but was left on there. The lead didn’t last: Jesus Flores tied the game with two outs in the bottom 2nd, launching a liner into the left center gap for a 2-run double. The runs were unearned after a Nunley error in the inning. But Santos struggled badly with a lineup that had only one right-handed batter (Bill Thomas) and ran up 100 pitches in five innings. He also incurred a deficit when Jalen Parks hit an RBI double in the bottom 3rd to give the Thunder a 3-2 lead. The loss didn’t stick, however, as Walter singled in Nunley in the sixth, tying the game at three.

Cookie was walked intentionally in the top 7th after Howard Jones had hit a 1-out pinch-hit double in place of Manobu Sugano. The strategy worked for the Thunder as McKnight flew out and Nunley rolled a 3-1 pitch to Farias to end the inning. In turn, the Raccoons collapsed in the bottom 7th. Thrasher issued a leadoff walk to Cameron Konrath, before Armando Rodriguez hit an infield single. Both embarked on a fine double steal. Thrasher struck out Farias, but was removed for Mathis, who conceded four runs on Thomas’ 2-run single and Parks’ 2-run homer. Funnily enough the Coons scored three runs in the top 8th against three Thunder relievers, and it was just not enough. Micah Steele (…) pitched a perfect ninth against the top of the order. 7-6 Thunder. DeWeese 2-4; Baca (PH) 1-1, HR, 2 RBI; Jones (PH) 1-1;

Game 3
POR: CF Carmona – SS Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B A. Young – RF Fucito – C Baca – 2B Jones – P Magnotta
OCT: CF S. Young – 2B Farias – 1B B. Thomas – C Parks – LF L. Taylor – 3B J. Soto – SS A. Rodriguez – RF J. Flores – P Gine

The Coons opened with a run thanks to a Cookie triple and Walter’s sac fly in the first. A run was cute, but it was immediately threatened to get buried under a Thunderslide when Magnotta started his day with two walks. Thomas popped out and Parks grounded hard to third, where Nunley tipped his base and fired to first in time for a 5-3 double play. On to the third, where half the Coons dugout applauded Jorge Gine when he hit DeWeese with a pitch. That put two on with two out for Young, preceding an obvious strikeout. The Thunder tied the game in the bottom of the third, with Sean Young singling, Emilio Farias doubling, and Thomas bringing in Young with a groundout. Somehow, Farias remained on base, and somehow the infield single by Logan Taylor (who limped off the field afterwards and was replaced by Vinny Diaz) and subsequent balk and walk by Magnotta didn’t give them a lead in the fourth, either. He walked two in the fifth, with Young being caught stealing third base by Baca before Parks struck out to leave Thomas in scoring position. That was Magnotta’s first K in the game against five walks, and that balk.

Magnotta finally ended in the dumpster outside the stadium in the sixth. Jesus Soto homered, and Rodriguez hit a 1-out single after that. But the Thunder gave all they had to take him off the hook themselves; the top 7th first saw Fucito reach with a leadoff single before Rodriguez blew a double play grounder by Jones into an error, and when Ron Richards hit for Beaver and grounded to first, Thomas made ANOTHER error to load the bases. Three on, one out, top of the order approaching! When had Cookie ever hit into a double play!?* Grounder to Farias, to Rodriguez, to Thomas, double play.

The Thunder busted Chun and Sugano for three runs in the bottom of the inning then, a complex orgy of walks and singles, and also a wild pitch. The Coons faced Steve Rob in the eighth after Gine departed following a walk to Walter. Nunley reached on a Gine error, before Rob, a right-hander, struck out DeWeese AND Young, but following McKnight grabbing a bat in place of Fucito, they sent left-hander Ken McKenzie, who got a groundout to Farias. The game ended in the bottom 8th in a sudden thunderstorm – THANKFULLY. 5-1 Thunder. Fucito 2-3;

In other news

July 12 – The Falcons acquire 29-yr old OF Ryan Feldmann (.258, 10 HR, 46 RBI) from the Condors, leaving Tijuana with the services of 33-yr old LF/RF Domingo Nieves (.273, 5 HR, 24 RBI) and #38 prospect Alfredo Mendoza, a right-handed pitcher.
July 14 – The Warriors acquire CL Ron Sakellaris (2-5, 2.58 ERA, 21 SV) from the Titans, parting with two prospects.
July 15 – The Stars receive OF/2B Nate McKee (.274, 4 HR, 24 RBI) and a prospect from the Scorpions in their trade for C Raúl Hernandez (.272, 1 HR, 29 RBI).
July 16 – SFW SP Luis Guerrero (11-6, 3.24 ERA) 3-hits the Pacifics in a 6-0 shutout.
July 17 – SFB OF Dave Garcia (.267, 7 HR, 50 RBI) will miss two weeks with knee tendinitis.
July 20 – The Miners acquire SP Tim Dunn (6-8, 4.51 ERA) in a trade with the Wolves, sending them two prospects.
July 22 – One hit in the Warriors’ 9-3 win over the Miners is enough for SFW 1B Stanley Murphy (.306, 15 HR, 66 RBI) to reach 2,000 career hits. The 36-year old 5-time All Star, 2-time World Series champ, and 2011 FLCS and World Series MVP hits a single off Pittsburgh’s Jeremiah Bowman to reach the mark.
July 22 – The Aces acquire SP Brian Benjamin (4-10, 3.90 ERA) from the Capitals for #82 prospect INF Brian McAteer.
July 23 – CHA SP Dave Beebe (3-8, 5.75 ERA) could find a groove all year long, and now will spend at least nine months on the DL to recuperate a stretched elbow ligament.
July 23 – TOP SP Alberto Molina (9-8, 3.04 ERA) shines with a 2-hit shutout of the Stars, who go down 8-0.
July 24 – CHA SP Steve Kreider (7-11, 5.50 ERA) has his season end with a torn back muscle.

Complaints and stuff

Sunday in Oklahoma, I hardly noticed after the Carmona double play.* I was too busy biting into a stool’s leg. To be precise, I carried the stool, clenched irremovably in between my jaws, to the airplane with me, growling at security when they tried to remove it.

I *did* hear somebody saying that DeWeese made a snide remark about Cookie’s unclutchiness in the dugout between innings and that Howard Jones and Nick Brown had to remove him from DeWeese’s face. Our likeable leftfielder suffered two minor scratches, but Cookie failed to take his eyes out. But like I said, I hardly noticed. I was too busy imagining death.

Jonny Toner pitched eight strong innings on Saturday, which means that he will be back in time to take Magnotta’s spot next week, although he could also slide in ahead of Santos into the Friday game. That will be a home series against the Knights, following an off day.

The bitter sweep at the hooves of the disgusting Elks has put us under .500 all-time against them again (355-358), and I don’t want to talk about our 2-9 record against them this season. Truth be told, you don’t deserve anything better if you can’t score more than eight runs in 47 innings.

Danny Ochoa came off the DL on Tuesday and was assigned to AAA. Not that I see much in terms of salvation in Jimmy Fucito, but we need his bat to balance the lineup against left-handed pitching, and off the bench as well. Ochoa did very well in a limited role early in the season, but you can’t get through left-handed pitching with five left-handed outfielders. I have been trying to trade Ron Richards, but nobody wants his bacon.

We had a trade proposal from the Miners during the All Star break. They offered the services of 30-yr old outfielder Dave Carter for both Hector Santos and Seung-mo Chun. Now, Carter, who is not suitable for centerfield, but a right-handed batter, is quite at the peak of his career, which got started late and leaves him still two years shy of reaching free agency. He had put up OPS values of .827 or better for three straight years, and had a .925 OPS this year. He had 87 homers since the start of the 2013 season, and also had a good eye and drew lots of walks. He was a perfect fit for a #3 batter, and he could replace Ron Richards in a heartbeat.

Except that I don’t want to part with Santos AND give them a reliever (though Chun’s value is probably not very high) for a 30-year old, even a 30-year old with a very cheap contract. Few things would get better with him, because we still would have to figure out a way to get rid of Richards, and then there was the mild problem of further tearing up the holes all over the pitching staff. We can’t adequately fill 12 positions even right now. If the Raccoons were four games out rather than fourteen and had at least some reserve pitching available, this would probably be the right shakeup trade to make a move in the second half of the season, but with the way things were it was better not to make the move.

Also consider the following: Santos is under contract through 2021 for a *very* reasonable price, $1.25M this year and $1.75M for the next six years, which is probably not bad for a starting pitcher having made three All Star Games in a row.

This is a very difficult situation. The Critters are obviously playing around .500 right now, which is mostly the offense’s fault. The farm looks dire. While we certainly have a few players with high (trade) value on the roster, all of them are either still on the minimum, or on very team-friendly deals for what they are putting out. Looking at Santos, Toner, Cookie, Nunley, and maybe McKnight here. All of them are locked up or under team control through 2019 at least. Heck, even Adam Young is supposed to be on that list. Young is probably the key for the team to contend in 2017. He ****ing hit well in San Francisco, he *can* hit, he just doesn’t do it right now. I hoped for a Luke Black-type of precedent and that he would hit 35 homers here, but he’s probably not going to hit 15…

If we can somehow find a catcher, some relievers, and Young’s bat, the Coons could be in the mix again in 2017. But for that they need Hector Santos.

I shopped a number of players the last week, but I didn’t get any remotely appealing offers. There were zero offers even for Ron Thrasher. The only guys that I will not shop are: Brownie, Toner, Santos, Munroe, Nunley, McKnight, and Cookie. I have already shopped DeWeese – no takers. Must be the clubhouse horror stories going round the league.

We bowed out of the Jonathan Benitez bidding on July 20 when the prize went over $450k. We spent $500k on Danny Arguello a few years back, a sum that will probably never be converted into a single major league win, and ultimately I was unwilling to shoot next year’s signing period with somebody that didn’t look any better than Arguello (who was 19 and struggling in single-A) had back in 2013. So despite money available, the Raccoons ended their international free agent period with only $117k spent on five players, none more expensive than Manuel Cardona’s $40k.

In terms of failed prospects, we released five minor leaguers in the last week, including 2013 fifth-rounder 2B Terry Gibbons, who at 24 stunk up the joint in Ham Lake, 2015 sixth-rounder Gary Coffin, relievers Tim Patton and Jason Slaughter as well as C Jake Schwaiger, who had been a trash heap signing.

*He had one DP this season, and only 16 for his major league career of over 2,400 PA. Before Sunday.

[Westheim]

As the new week began, we discarded Jeff Magnotta (0-3, 4.50 ERA) back to St. Petersburg and brought back Jonny Toner. That’s some good news!

Raccoons (46-50) vs. Bayhawks (55-44) – July 25-27, 2016

The Bayhawks led the South and came into this series with a perfect 3-0 clip against the Raccoons in ’16. They led the league in runs scored and a number of other offensive categories, but were only eighth in runs allowed with a creaky rotation that carried a 4.42 ERA, only good enough for ninth in the CL.

Projected matchups:
Chris Munroe (2-7, 3.68 ERA) vs. Milt Beauchamp (4-9, 5.89 ERA)
Tadasu Abe (6-7, 4.28 ERA) vs. Jared D’Attilo (4-4, 4.57 ERA)
Nick Brown (10-5, 2.20 ERA) vs. Clark Johnson (1-1, 3.74 ERA)

Three right-handers, as we’re missing their best (surviving) pitcher and only southpaw, Joao Joo (11-5, 3.16 ERA). They do carry FOUR left-handed relievers, however, so we can forget about mounting any comebacks right away…

The difference in runs scored between those teams, by the way, would be 131. 494 for San Fran, 363 for Portland, which is of course the team that graces the bottom in offense in the CL.

Game 1
SFB: 3B J. Rodriguez – RF McIntyre – LF Alston – CF Almanza – C D. Alexander – 2B Ingraham – SS R. Miller – 1B Mateo – P Beauchamp
POR: CF Carmona – 2B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – SS McKnight – RF Richards – C Baca – P Munroe

First time through the order, only Ron Richards reached base, and he did so on a Zach Ingraham error. Nope, the fountain of offense would not suddenly gush runs again, it didn’t even sputter. While Munroe did his very best and didn’t allow a run until the fourth, when consecutive singles put runners on the corners and Jaime Mateo hit for a run-scoring groundout, Beauchamp, whose stats didn’t scream out something like a no-hitter, held the Coons hitless well into the game. It wasn’t until with one out in the fifth inning that McKnight and Richards hit back-to-back doubles to tie the game. General befuddlement ensued when Cookie Carmona socked a home run in the bottom 6th to give the home team a 2-1 lead. Deserved or not, the Bayhawks had their chances: Munroe’s control went away in the middle innings and he ended up with six walks in 6.2 innings, the last two of those coming to Ron Alston and Chris Almanza with two outs in the seventh. Kevin Beaver got a grounder from Dylan Alexander to end the inning. In a game extremely starved for highlights, this was the crucial moment; John Korb and Ron Thrasher turned in scoreless innings despite issuing a walk each, and the Bayhawks were defeated by the slimmest of margins. 2-1 Coons. Munroe 6.2 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 6 BB, 4 K, W (3-7);

Both teams only managed five hits apiece. Also, we killed a 15-game hitting streak for Ron Alston, who walked three times, but also struck out in the first inning.

I’m browsing the hitting coach applications. By now, I’m ready to shake things up. Why not hire a 64-year-old housekeeper and mother of six boys? I’m sure she’d know a few tricks to get the rancid offense going. Although it probably wouldn’t do us much good if she sent all the players to bed in the sixth inning for not having done their homework.

Game 2
SFB: 3B J. Rodriguez – RF McIntyre – LF Alston – CF Almanza – C D. Alexander – 2B Ingraham – SS Claros – 1B Mateo – P D’Attilo
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 2B Jones – 1B Sambrano – C Margolis – P Abe

D’Attilo faced the minimum through two despite Cookie walking (caught stealing) and Richards singling (picked off), but another leadoff walk to Sambrano came back to hurt him in the bottom 3rd. Margolis singled, Abe was not able to bunt, but Cookie sent a looper up the leftfield line for an RBI double, the first run in the game. McKnight and Nunley had runners in scoring position but McKnight wore his pants over his eyes and couldn’t see the ball, and Nunley was called out after everybody had waited ten minutes for him to return from the fast food temple across the street. At least McKnight went on to redeem himself a little bit with a 2-out RBI double in the fifth, plating Margolis, after which Nunley struck out in person.

D’Attilo was hit for after that fifth inning, but Armando Chavez led off the top 6th with a groundout and the Bayhawks couldn’t get past Tadasu Abe, who was working on a 2-hitter. Chris Almanza dispelled the looming shutout with a solo home run in the seventh inning, his 24th of the season (DeWeese? Anything to say, R.J.?), and the Birds got Raul Claros all the way to third base after a leadoff walk in the eighth. DeWeese, while not batting anything recently except his teammates’ feelings, made a headlong dive on Javy Rodriguez’ liner to left that threatened to die on the grass and plate Claros with two outs – DeWeese kept the 2-1 lead together, even if he hadn’t contributed anything to the offense so far. *So far*… he came up with two outs in the bottom 8th. Matt Nunley had just singled off Chae-ku Lee, and DeWeese rocked a shot to center that whizzed over the wall by just a foot, but doubled the Coons’ runs to four. Chris Mathis finished the game by quickly retiring Will McIntyre, Alston, and Almanza. 4-1 Critters. Margolis 2-3; Abe 8.0 IP, 3 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 4 K, W (7-7);

Game 3
SFB: C Eaton – 1B Mateo – LF Alston – CF Almanza – RF McIntyre – 3B J. Rodriguez – 2B Ingraham – SS R. Miller – P C. Johnson
POR: CF Carmona – SS Walter – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 1B Young – 2B Jones – C Baca – P Brown

After being suffocated by marginal pitching for two days, the Baybirds burst out all over Brownie right in the first inning. The first three batters all reached base as Pat Eaton walked, Mateo singled, and Alston got nicked by a 1-2 fastball. Almanza hit into a run-scoring double play before additional runs were driven in by McIntyre with a triple and Rodriguez with a single, putting the Raccoons into a 3-0 hole. This was only the beginning to an outright miserable outing by Brownie, who pitched like a blind high schooler and managed to hit three batters in the first four innings. The Bayhawks were denied additional runs in that span thanks to another double play turned for Brown, who had nothing going for himself with his left paw, and made things even worse in the fifth inning, plating an additional run for the Bayhawks with a throwing error on Chris Almanza’s grounder. That ran the score to 4-0, with only two hits amassed against Clark Johnson so far, but the Critters loaded them up on three singles (Jones, Brown, Carmona) with one out in the bottom 5th. Shane Walter scored their only run in the inning with a groundout before Nunley fouled out.

Ingraham’s 1-out double knocked Brown from the game in the sixth inning. Seung-mo Chun appeared to make things so much worse. His first pitch was cracked to deep center by Ryan Miller. While Cookie somehow got a glove on that one for the second out, Clark Johnson then hit an RBI double and Chun allowed two more singles before Oberst von Lindenthal lured him into one of the booby traps he had installed on the infield. Sugano struck out Alston, but the Raccoons were now down by five, and nominally had no hopes for a comeback. A double switch after the sixth removed the disgusting Adam Young and brought in Sambrano mainly to allow Will West to pitch two innings, which he would do in shutout fashion. Sambrano however hit a 1-out triple in the bottom 7th and scored on Cookie’s groundout, putting the Coons back in the race down 6-3. That was still the score in the ninth, facing Jeff Boynton, who was not exactly overwhelming with his 3.38 ERA. Howard Jones led off with a single, but would be forced on Sambrano’s grounder. Cookie however found the gap in left center and doubled with two outs, pulling up Shane Walter as the tying run after all. Walter snuck the first pitch he saw through the hole on the right side, plating both, 6-5, and then Nunley livened up an 0-for-4 nightmare with a bloop single. This brought up DeWeese, and the home crowd, who didn’t know half of the **** going down in the clubhouse, stood up and chanted for their princely-paid slugger to turn this one around and sweep a first-place team. He grounded out to Jaime Mateo. 6-5 Bayhawks. Carmona 2-5, 2B, RBI; Walter 3-5, 2B, 3 RBI; Jones 2-4; Sambrano 1-2, 3B, RBI; West 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K;

Raccoons (48-51) vs. Knights (44-57) – July 29-31, 2016

Two hopeless teams for this weekend set, with the Knights having dropped into last place in the South. They were fourth in runs scored and ninth in runs allowed, with a -35 run differential that not quite stark enough to explain why they were 13 games under .500; without a doubt they would wake up right now. The season series was tied at three, with the Raccoons having won the season contest with Atlanta for three straight years.

Projected matchups:
Hector Santos (9-5, 2.65 ERA) vs. Pancho Trevino (7-6, 4.46 ERA)
Jonathan Toner (4-5, 2.81 ERA) vs. Felipe Ramirez (4-8, 4.59 ERA)
Chris Munroe (3-7, 3.53 ERA) vs. Dave Hogan (9-9, 5.12 ERA)

Three right-handers from the Knights, who do not employ a southpaw starter. They were also without a few important bats including Dennis Berman who was laboring on a sore knee but could return to the field any day now.

Game 1
ATL: CF M. Reyes – SS Hibbard – RF Dally – LF Rockwell – C Luna – 2B Downing – 3B W. White – 1B Betancourt – P Trevino
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 1B Young – 2B Jones – C Baca – P Santos

The Coons struck first thanks to a Cookie single and McKnight’s RBI double in the bottom 1st. Devin Hibbard dropped Nunley’s soft line to move McKnight to third base on the error, and DeWeese scored him with a grounder, putting Santos ahead 2-0, but Santos needed 46 pitches for three perfect innings, which was due to running four 3-ball counts, including three full counts in a row to the 6-7-8 batters. He would go on to retire the first 13 Knights in the game before Ruben Luna doubled into the leftfield corner. He would not get deeper into the game than six and a third, but the Knights were still shut out after Hibbard grounded out to short to start the seventh inning, and in fact the score was still 2-0, which definitely was no surprise ‘round here anymore. The lead didn’t make it. Kevin Beaver allowed singles to Luna and Josh Downing to start the eighth inning, and Chris Mathis surrendered the runs on Jimmy Raupp’s pinch-hit single to center with one out.

While I was lying on the floor of the office in agony, and Hector Santos considered taking batting lessons in the offseason to enhance his chances in the future, the Raccoons were donated an opportunity in the bottom 8th. With two outs, the Knights’ Yuji Hashimoto and Josh Downing made consecutive errors to put Richards and Young on base. Jimmy Fucito batted for Jim Cushing with no left-handed bats available (Walter was already in the game, and Sambrano was not hitting anything) and hit the first pitch entirely toothless to short, where Devin Hibbard finally made a play, ending the inning. Sugano pitched a perfect ninth, whiffing Javier Gusmán (who had taken over for an injured Marty Reyes) and Justin Dally, which gave the team a chance to walk off if they could somehow find a run. Baca hit a leadoff single, was run for by Sambrano, and the Raccoons never got their winning run off first base… In turn, John Korb allowed hits to Gil Rockwell and Wade White in the top of the tenth, Rockwell scored, and the Coons disappeared into the night without much fuss in the bottom of the tenth. 3-2 Knights. Carmona 2-5; McKnight 2-5, 2 2B; Santos 6.1 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 6 K and 1-2;

Reyes had broken a finger on a headlong defensive play, which would put him out for about six weeks.

Jonny’s back! Maybe he can hit a single, steal two bases, and MAYBE, MAYBE some mook can find a productive out then…

Game 2
ATL: SS Hibbard – 3B W. White – LF Rockwell – RF Dally – 2B Downing – C Luna – CF Walrath – 1B Betancourt – P F. Ramirez
POR: CF Carmona – 3B Walter – SS McKnight – LF DeWeese – 1B Young – RF Fucito – 2B Jones – C Baca – P Toner

Another first inning, another lead for the Critters, and they really blew the lid off the container with the runs this time. After two outs, McKnight singled and DeWeese homered for a 2-0 lead. That wasn’t all: Young singled, and Fucito homered! 4-0! Not that the lead held up for long… Toner allowed hard contact in his return right from the start (Devin Hibbard hit his very first pitch to deep right, but into an out), and the Knights rapped him for three hits and two runs in the top of the second, with Reyes replacement Jeffrey Walrath knocking a 2-run triple. Toner remained wonky and faced runners on the corners again in the fourth inning, but was lucky enough that he got Ramirez up with two outs. The Coons also brought up their pitcher with Fucito and Jones on the corners in the bottom 4th, but Toner batted with one out and had already singled in his first plate appearance, but struck out in a full count before Cookie flew out to Walrath. He was still on the mound in the seventh inning, which turned out to be the turning point in this particular game. David Betancourt’s single was followed with Toner hitting Jimmy Raupp hitting for Ramirez. Hibbard was a right-hander, the temptation was there, and it was also fatal. Hibbard hit a ball to deep left, DeWeese got a claw on it, and the ball caromed around in his glove while DeWeese was heading right for the wall. He managed to bounce off the wall without killing himself, but he lost the ball – Hibbard had an RBI double, and Toner was knocked from the game. Sugano threw one pitch on which Wade White hit a liner to left that DeWeese caught, but it also allowed the tying run to score. Mathis then struck out Rockwell. And the Coons kept melting. Ruben Luna hit an RBI double off Thrasher in the eighth to break the tie, but maybe they had a comeback in them against left-hander Quinn McCarthy in the bottom 8th. Shane Walter walked to start the inning. McKnight moved him up to second with a grounder before DeWeese singled to center. Desperate, the Coons sent Walter around third, the throw came home – safe! DeWeese was the go-ahead run on second base with one out for Young, who flew out to Justin Dally, and Fucito struck out. Bottom 9th, righty Jim Cushing on the mound again. Jones flew out to right, but Baca singled. He was not run for, at least not until Ron Richards somehow found a misfiled single in his pocket. Baca moved to second and was replaced by Sambrano. Cookie ran a 3-1 count against Cushing before grounding up the middle. Hibbard lunged, didn’t get it, and with Sandy running, this was no doubt a walkoff! 6-5 Raccoons. DeWeese 2-4, HR, 3 RBI; Young 2-4; Fucito 2-4, HR, 2 RBI;

Seung-mo Chun got the win, pitching four outs in relief.

The Knights made a pitching change for the Sunday game, bringing in Shaun Yoder (6-5, 3.41 ERA), another right-hander.

Game 3
ATL: SS Hibbard – 3B W. White – LF Rockwell – RF Dally – 2B Downing – C Luna – CF Walrath – 1B Betancourt – P Yoder
POR: CF Carmona – SS McKnight – 3B Nunley – LF DeWeese – RF Richards – 1B Young – C Baca – 2B Bergquist – P Munroe

The Raccoons took the lead with a 4-run inning again, this time in the third after earlier efforts had ended with a most unfortunate Bergquist double play. In the third, McKnight hit a 1-out triple and scored on Nunley’s single before DeWeese and Richards homered back-to-back to give the fans something to chant. Munroe was pitching a 1-hitter through four, but a Downing single and a Walrath homer cut the lead in half, 4-2. Back-to-back doubles in the sixth by Hibbard and Dally chopped off another run, and the Raccoons kept killing their efforts with another double play in the sixth. Baca hit into that one.

Munroe had used 95 pitches in six innings and was replaced by the seventh. Kevin Beaver pitched a scoreless inning against the bottom of the order, and maybe, just maybe we could get things moving in the bottom of the inning. Our own bottom of the order produced two singles to start the frame by Bergquist and Walter, which brought up Cookie, who was not exactly hot recently, 0-for-3 in this game, and popped out to short. McKnight and Nunley both grounded out, and nobody scored. Wade White singled off Will West (wow, wow, wow) in the eighth, but West struck out Rockwell for the second out before Thrasher was employed to remove Dally, which he did with a grounder to short. The bottom 8th only yielded a 2-out double by Young and Baca’s strikeout, so Thrasher remained in the game for the ninth, trying to nurse the 4-3 lead to safety to continue to extend our streak of beating the Knights for four straight seasons. He struck out Downing before things went south. Luna singled and was run for by Kyle Mims, who had speed and nothing else. Walrath singled, and Betancourt launched a deep fly to left that DeWeese spoiled, but Mims moved to third base. Javier Gusmán hit in the #9 hole, at least a left-handed batter. Thrasher whiffed him, and this one was in the bag. 4-3 Furballs. Nunley 2-4, RBI; Young 3-4, 2B; Walter (PH) 1-1;

In other news

July 25 – The Wolves deal SP Zach Hughes (1-1, 4.00 ERA), who missed most of 2015 and 2016 with injury, to the Warriors for five prospects, including #53 prospect 1B Austin Metzger.
July 25 – In only three games in the Federal League, two end in a 10-0 shutout. The Blue Sox blow out the Warriors, the Miners romp the Wolves, and the Buffaloes’ 3-2 win over the Gold Sox there is actually something like suspense for nine innings.
July 26 – The Wolves hold a 4-2 lead in the ninth inning against the Miners before imploding for eight runs and a 10-4 loss. Pittsburgh’s Dave Carter (.286, 26 HR, 86 RBI) hits a 3-run homer off Joe O’Brian in the inning.
July 27 – SAC 3B Jason LaCombe (.358, 2 HR, 40 RBI) has two hits in the Scorpions’ 6-2 win over the Capitals to run a hitting streak to 20 games.
July 27 – Bad news for the Miners, who will be without their star SS Tom McWhorter (.296, 16 HR, 64 RBI) for the next two weeks. The 28-year old is out with a mild quad strain.
July 27 – 2B Ross Irvin’s (.250, 4 HR, 31 RBI) home run is all the scoring in the Pacifics’ 1-0 win over the Cyclones.
July 28 – The Falcons and Loggers conclude a trade that sends INF Steve Best (.333, 2 HR, 33 RBI) to the Loggers and sees the return journey being made by SS/2B Oscar Sandoval (.291, 0 HR, 30 RBI) and a second-rate prospect.
July 28 – The Thunder trade 29-yr old MR Steve Rob (3-4, 3.83 ERA, 1 SV), who saved 54 games between 2014 and 2015, to the Aces for two prospects.
July 30 – The Crusaders continue to add talent to their already loaded roster, trading for Sacramento’s SP Albert Lorusso (8-8, 3.97 ERA). The Scorpions receive a pitching prospect.
July 30 – The 22-game hitting streak of SAC 3B Jason LaCombe (.352, 2 HR, 40 RBI) is killed by the Buffaloes, who hold him hitless in five at-bats while routing the Scorpions, 14-3.
July 30 – The Aces shut out the Titans 6-0, despite having only four hits to the Titans’ six. Titans pitchers offer seven walks to aid the Aces, and ex-Titan 1B Tony Ramos (.265, 8 HR, 49 RBI) hits a 3-run homer for Las Vegas.
July 31 – Radial nerve compression ends the season of BOS SP Dave Priest (10-5, 4.39 ERA).

Complaints and stuff

The Thunder are selling. I don’t think I’ve seen that before.

I tried to sell, but nobody was buying. The team is that rotten. I even shopped Shane Walter and Adam Young; DeWeese of course as well but by my count 20 GM’s laughed and three flipped me off. Funny thing: the Bayhawks would have taken back Adam Young and even would have returned Dylan Alexander. Gee, no thanks.

We have started a 20-day string of consecutive games. The pace won’t slow down after that, either, because after an off day on August 18 we will play a double header with the Crusaders right away. In total, we have 30 games in August on our plate.