Portland Raccoons (ABL)

[Westheim]

Raccoons (39-53) @ Crusaders (52-41) – July 18-20, 2023

The Crusaders were losing ground on the Titans in the division race so it was very convenient for them to have some punching bags coming in. With half the games between these two teams this season already played, they held a 7-2 edge over the Raccoons. While they had the worst batting average of any CL team, they were at least eighth in runs scored, exploiting extra base hits and walks both alike, and they also had the best pitching overall, conceding the fewest runs in the league.

Projected matchups:
Chris McKendrick (3-3, 2.62 ERA) vs. Mike Rutkowski (11-4, 2.91 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (5-6, 4.21 ERA) vs. Tim Dunn (7-7, 3.53 ERA)
Travis Garrett (2-3, 3.65 ERA) vs. Alejandro Mendez (10-6, 2.70 ERA)

Their starters would come right, left, right, in that order.

Game 1
POR: 2B Claros – LF Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – CF Stevenson – SS Stalker – C Tovias – P McKendrick
NYC: SS R. Soto – 3B Schmit – RF Fullerton – LF J. Williams – 1B I. Flores – 2B S. Valdez – C Asay – CF Douglas – P Rutkowski

In his closest bid for his maiden home run in a while, Jarod Spencer hit a ball off the fence in rightfield in the first inning, then scored on Nunley’s 2-out single to right for the first run of the game, with Nunley continuing his hot bat post-ASG that had won him a Player of the Week already. Unfortunately, Chris McKendrick and a mostly left-handed lineup would not gel well, at least not for the pitcher. Doubles by Andy Schmit and Jake Williams in the bottom 1st, both past either side of Alfaro, tied the game right away before Nunley handled Ivan Flores’ slow grounder splendidly for the third out. McKendrick got blasted before long; while the Crusaders’ go-ahead run in the bottom 2nd was technically unearned because Nunley spiked a throw that Walter couldn’t come up with that placed Jason Asay aboard to begin with, McKendrick might have wanted to retire Rutkowski with two outs, but allowed a single, then another one to Robby Soto to score the run. Not getting the ****ing pitcher out with two gone would bite him in the arse again the following time through. Rutkowski batted with runners on the corners and two outs, but was inexplicably walked by the Coons’ hurler, after which Robby Soto banged a slam to bury the Coons in a 6-1 hole.

With the starter gone by the fifth, David Kipple also struggled to retire left-handers, put two Crusaders on base and was then lifted for Adam Cowen with two outs and the runners in scoring position. Cowen allowed a 2-run double into the leftfield corner to the left-handed batting Asay, 8-1, and while it was extremely encouraging that Omar Alfaro went deep off Rutkowski in the sixth inning to extend a hitting streak to 13 games, in the smaller context of this game the solo homer would not mean much at all. Bottom 6th, the Crusaders pulled Alfaro’s run right back on two errors. Rutkowski got aboard on Tim Stalker’s throwing error, and then Alfaro overran Soto’s single to shallow right for an extra base. Both runs would score, but were unearned. The Raccoons had no answer whatsoever to this rout in progress and went down mostly silently. Rutkowski went eight innings for his 12th win of the season. 10-2 Crusaders. Spencer 2-4, 2B; Delgado (PH) 1-1; Cowen 2.1 IP, 2 H, 2 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 0 K and 1-1;

After this game, the Crusaders acquired 1B Xavier Garcia (.305, 3 HR, 23 RBI) from the Warriors in return for third-string catcher Alfonso Gonzales, which sounded like a good deal to me… for the Crusaders.

Game 2
POR: CF Stevenson – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – LF Newman – RF Alfaro – 3B Nunley – C Delgado – SS Stalker – P Gutierrez
NYC: 1B X. Garcia – CF Douglas – 3B Schmit – LF J. Williams – RF I. Flores – 2B S. Valdez – C McPherson – SS R. Soto – P Dunn

In a copy of Tuesday’s first inning, Jarod Spencer landed a 1-out base hit, this time a single, then scored on the cleanup man’s single, in this case Will Newman, to give the Coons’ starter an early lead. Rico Gutierrez would also face a mostly left-handed lineup, so there would hardly be an excuse for a bad outing. While he was soul-searching in the first inning and didn’t get ahead of any batter, walking Xavier Garcia, the Crusaders didn’t get through, then didn’t get much at all the next few innings, drawing only another walk against six strikeouts through four. The top 5th saw the Coons in business, although Tim Dunn started their attempt at a second run with an error that put on leadoff man Tony Delgado. Stalker walked, Gutierrez bunted over the runners, and Stevenson was walked intentionally to fill the bases for Spencer, who lined out to Williams in left, with Delgado coming home being the only run scoring in the inning once Shane Walter struck out.

The Crusaders had the bases loaded with no outs in the bottom 5th then. Sergio Valdez had singled hard up the middle, their first base hit in the game, before Gutierrez had walked Eric McPherson and drilled Soto. Dunn struck out, Garcia struck out, but Lance Douglas singled to right to score one, and Gutierrez scored the tying run himself with a wild pitch before Schmit flew out to Alfaro in shallow right. Oh the humanity…! It only got worse from there, because of course it did. Gutierrez struck out ten batters in the game, but wouldn’t make it through six innings after a Valdez double with two outs in the bottom 6th. Cory Dew came on, walked McPherson, allowed an RBI double to Soto, a 2-run single to Dunn (…!!), and then Alfaro made a running catch in the gap on Garcia’s bid for extra bases. Down 5-2 the Coons were once more what they always were – buried. Actually, they did have another bid for a comeback, in the eighth inning. Dunn was still going, but put Newman and Nunley on base. Delgado batted with two outs, lined to the left side, but Schmit swiped the ball and ended the inning. 5-2 Crusaders. Newman 3-4, RBI; Stalker 1-2, BB, 2B;

We out-hit New York 9-5 here. It was still not remotely enough.

Alfaro had a single amongst three strikeouts, extending his hitting streak to 14 contests.

Game 3
POR: 2B Claros – LF Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – CF Stevenson – SS Stalker – C Tovias – P Garrett
NYC: 1B X. Garcia – 3B Schmit – LF J. Williams – CF I. Flores – 2B S. Valdez – C Asay – RF Douglas – SS R. Soto – P A. Mendez

With Stevenson coming home on Elias Tovias’ 2-out double in the second inning, the Coons again scored first, unable to grasp the bad luck they brought upon themselves with those early runs … (hey, you come up with a better explanation for what is going on!) – also, there was “Tragic” Travis pitching, so there was that. He struck out the side in the bottom 2nd around two singles, then walked the bases full in the third, only to whiff Asay to escape, and the Crusaders stranded Soto (single) and Garcia (walk) in the fourth when Schmit grounded out. The big inning was just waiting to happen, so maybe we could tack on some runs?

But the Raccoons were as usual extremely clumsy at the plate, and when they did open the third inning with singles by Claros and Spencer, they soon enough found some fool to hit into a double play, that fool being Walter. Only the in the fifth inning did they scratch out another run on three consecutive 2-out singles by Spencer, Walter, and Nunley, the latter tying Walter for the team RBI lead – Walter had driven in only two runs in the last five weeks, which was pathetic even with the All Star break and a 2-week DL stint factored in. Also pathetic: Garrett, who didn’t make it through five innings before being yanked. The bottom 5th began with a homer by Williams, cutting our 2-0 lead in half, and then Flores singled, Valdez doubled, and Asay’s liner to left was caught by a hustling Spencer or else the Crusaders would already have taken the lead. David Kipple threw an anchor upon replacing Garrett (4.1 IP, 6 H, 5 BB), striking out both Douglas and Soto to strand the tying and go-ahead runs in scoring position. At that point, Adam Cowen came up with two scoreless innings against a swing-eager New York team, maintaining the Coons’ 2-1 lead, which Billy Brotman further maintained in the eighth. The Coons appeared in business with Tim Stalker’s leadoff triple off Steve Casey to begin the ninth, and Tovias dropped a soft floater into shallow right for his second RBI of the game, 3-1. Claros would also get on, and with two down Shane Walter doubled to the fence in right, driving home another run and claiming sole ownership of the team RBI lead again with … 44 ribbies. Nunley flew out, stranding a pair, but a well-rested Brett Lillis needed no more runs to get this one across the finish line. 4-1 Furballs. Spencer 2-5; Walter 3-5, 2B, RBI; Stevenson 1-2, BB; Tovias 2-4, 2B, 2 RBI; Cowen 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K;

Omar Alfaro had an ugly oh-fer with another pair of whiffs, thus ending his hitting streak.

However, this game extended Adam Cowen’s stay on the roster. Somehow, he earned his first hold of the season in this game, and then did it against the Crusaders, for two innings, and with a 1-run lead. He had originally been scheduled for deletion to get another starter onto the roster, but now lightning hit Joe Moore, who had been nothing but a mess recently. Plus, Moore had options, whilst Cowen was out of them.

We called up Matt Huf, who had pitched to a *0.78* ERA in seven starts for the Alley Cats since removal from the 25-man roster.

Raccoons (40-55) @ Bayhawks (48-48) – July 21-23, 2023

Ah, the Bay. The smell of slightly polluted salt water right next to the ballpark – who wouldn’t want to play there 81 times a year? The Baybirds were sixth in runs scored, fourth in runs allowed, with a +24 run differential that claimed they were better than a .500 team, but they had also lost two of three to the Coons in 2023, so how good could they be?

Projected matchups:
Jesus Chavez (6-9, 4.42 ERA) vs. Brian Simmons (6-9, 2.98 ERA)
Matt Huf (1-6, 5.16 ERA) vs. Denzel Durr (6-7, 4.22 ERA)
Chris McKendrick (3-4, 3.33 ERA) vs. Ruben Cervantes (7-6, 3.89 ERA)

For this series, we will face the southpaw up front, then two right-handers. For those who can’t place Simmons anywhere – he is a 9-year veteran, but he previously pitched for the Scorpions and this is his first stint with a CL team. He’s already 32 with an 84-59 record that would be worse if he hadn’t been on one of the best teams in baseball for the last half-decade or so. His career ERA was a mediocre 3.97 – although that was less mediocre in the offense-heavy Federal League. He had won 15 games three times in his career, and 13+ for five straight years, and he was also gifted with pinpoint control, walking just 2.6 per nine innings in his career, and 1.6 per nine this season!

Game 1
POR: CF Stevenson – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – LF Newman – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – SS Stalker – C Delgado – P Chavez
SFB: LF R. Gomez – C O’Dell – CF D. Garcia – 1B Jon Gonzalez – SS Sanks – 2B St. George – RF Booker – 3B Light – P Simmons

By contrast, here was an entirely right-handed lineup – sans the pitcher – that was up against Chavez, who coughed up a leadoff triple to Rafael Gomez in the first inning and surrendered a quick initial run on Brett O’Dell’s groundout. Worse yet, Gomez tripled on an 0-2 pitch that did nothing. The Bayhawks would have the leadoff man aboard in the next two innings as well, but failed to score them, and while Simmons retired the Critters in order the first time through the lineup, Stevenson led off the fourth with a double into the rightfield corner. Walter hit a single, Stevenson was held at third, and Newman knocked a bouncer to Stephen St. George for an inning-ending double play… It was no consolation that St. George also hit into an inning-ending double play a bit later in the bottom of the sixth; the main problem remained the Raccoons’ horrendous attitude at the plate. Walter in the sixth and Stalker in the seventh would hit doubles for the Coons, but both did so with two outs, and neither got any support from the guy behind them. Chavez ended up going seven on the hook, not allowing another run, although the Baybirds had pairs aboard (and left them aboard) twice, including in the bottom of the seventh, in which Simmons legged out an infield single that sent Jaden Booker to third base, too. That happened with one out, but Rafael Gomez struck out, and Nunley handled O’Dell’s bouncer for the final out. After the Coons went down haplessly in the top of the eighth, Cory Dew got torn to shreds. Hitting Jon Gonzalez was not the smartest move to begin with, but then he also allowed RBI hits to Stephen St. George and Jaden Booker, threw two wild pitches to Sean Light, and then allowed another RBI single to Light. He was so badly off the rolls that Kipple relieved him with two outs to face the opposing pitcher, Simmons, who allowed a leadoff single to Walter in the top of the ninth, walked Newman, and then Nunley stupidly hit into a double play. Alfaro struck out, letting Simmons get away with a 6-hit shutout. 4-0 Bayhawks. Walter 3-4, 2B; Stalker 2-3, 2 2B; Chavez 7.0 IP, 6 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 7 K, L (6-10);

It’s amazing how steadfastly a team can score exactly 3.4 runs per game.

And sometimes not at all.

Game 2
POR: 2B Claros – LF Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – SS Stalker – RF Graves – C Tovias – CF Santos – P Huf
SFB: LF R. Gomez – RF Booker – CF D. Garcia – 1B Jon Gonzalez – SS Sanks – 2B St. George – C R. Anderson – 3B Light – P Durr

The early innings saw hardly any offense. Both teams had two singles apiece and neither reached third base. Jarod Spencer came closest, actually touching third base, but not until after Light had slapped the tag on him on his second stolen base attempt of the first inning, and the first one that went awry. Huf, who had been around seven walks per nine innings before his demotion in June, didn’t walk anybody until Dave Garcia worked a free pass in the bottom 4th, but then immediately served up a gapper to Jon Gonzalez for an RBI double, the first tally in the Saturday game. He also walked Light in the fifth; the third baseman stole second base, then scored on Gomez’ 2-out single to left center, 2-0.

Through five it could have been much worse for Huf, but could hardly have been much worse for the Coons’ offense, which once again presented itself entirely and comfortably numb. When they did get the tying runs aboard, this was the result of a sixth-inning bloop single for Walter and Tim Stalker getting drilled. Graves struck out to end the inning. Huf went as far as the rest of the team would allow him to, spinning eight innings of 4-hit ball against the Baybirds. The Raccoons faced Tony Harrell in the ninth, starting with Stalker, who stalked right back to the dugout after swinging over a 1-2 pitch in the dirt. Graves flew out, but then the tying runs did get aboard. Alfaro walked in Tovias’ place, and Delgado singled up the middle for Santos. Stevenson batted for Huf, who suddenly had hope again, only to have it crushed when Stevenson grounded out to Sean Light to end the game. 2-0 Bayhawks. Delgado (PH) 1-1; Huf 8.0 IP, 4 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 8 K, L (1-7) and 1-3;

In five games with San Fran this year, we have scored eight runs. Nifty average there.

Game 3
POR: 2B Claros – LF Spencer – 1B Walter – RF Alfaro – SS Stalker – CF Stevenson – 3B Bullock – C Tovias – P McKendrick
SFB: LF R. Gomez – C O’Dell – CF D. Garcia – 1B Jon Gonzalez – SS Sanks – 2B St. George – RF Booker – 3B Light – P Cervantes

Claros and Alfaro on the corners after singles of their own, Tim Stalker grounded to the left side. Shane Sanks knocked the ball down, but could not get a throw off in time to catch Stalker at first, nor Claros at home, and the Coons took a first-inning 1-0 lead on the infield base hit. Stevenson grounded out, but – whee! – we had a run!! McKendrick hit a double in the second inning that turned out not to matter, then loaded the bases with nobody out in the bottom of the inning. Gonzalez singled, Sanks walked, St. George was hit in the upper arm. Jaden Booker’s grounder tied the game with the Critters getting only an out at second base, and then McKendrick restocked the bags with a walk to Light. Cervantes hit a sac fly to give himself a 2-1 lead before Gomez ripped himself out to strand two. The Coons’ pitcher continued to be way off, issuing a leadoff walk in the third that was drowned in a double play grounder, but also threw a wild pitch with two outs to Cervantes in the fourth…

Stalker tied the game in the fifth with his second 2-out RBI single of the contest, this one into centerfield and plating Spencer, who had singled and stolen second base. Bullock hit a leadoff single in the sixth, but was caught stealing, then committed a terrible throwing error in the bottom of the inning. McKendrick had issued a leadoff walk to Sanks, and was THIS close to getting yanked, when Bullock fired St. George’s bunt over Shane Walter’s head for a 2-base error. Runners on second and third and nobody out, McKendrick was as dead as disco. Vince D came on to see after Booker, ran a full count, then didn’t get the call on a pitch on the corner. The walk loaded the bags with Bayhawks, but Light’s fly to shallow left wouldn’t get anybody home, as Spencer made the catch on the run. Victor Sarabia batted for Cervantes in this spot, struck out, and in a perfect world Gomez would have made the last out, but he singled over Claros’ (a former Bayhawk) head and scored two to break a two-two tie. A passed ball was charged to Tovias afterwards before O’Dell grounded out. Both runs in the inning were on McKendrick, but unearned.

The Critters’ next base runner would be Stalker, reaching on a Sanks error to begin the eighth inning. Manny Sosa was the new reliever, a right-hander with soundly more walks than strikeouts and a 5.04 ERA that appeared generous, a creative selection in a 4-2 game with the tying run at the plate. Stevenson singled, but when we sent Nunley to bat for Bullock, the Bayhawks twitched and sent Miguel Cortes, a different right-hander with no walk issues. Nunley promptly grounded into a double play, while Cortes hurt himself, bringing on Marco De La Rosa, the fourth right-hander of the inning, and he had a 5.63 ERA and allowed an RBI single to Tovias, 4-3. Zach Graves’ foul pop was handled by O’Dell to end the inning. Bottom 8th, Kevin Surginer pitching. Jaden Booker sent a fly to deep center that went into Stevenson’s glove, but Josh stumbled and the ball went back out of his glove. In a wild flight, Booker was already approaching second base and as Stevenson scampered after the ball in the depths of this Grand Canyon-sized park, nothing was ever going to stop him. Booker circled around for an inside-the-park homer, restoring the Bayhawks’ 2-run lead. Tony Harrell would face the tying run in the ninth after Walter’s 2-out double. Tony Delgado batted for Surginer, grounded out to Light, and the Coons were rightfully swept. 5-3 Bayhawks. Walter 2-5, 2B; Alfaro 2-4, 2B; Stalker 2-4, 2 RBI;

In other news

July 18 – The Buffaloes pile it on the Blue Sox in a 15-2 rout. TOP LF/RF Alfredo Quintana (.290, 14 HR, 52 RBI) drives in six runs despite landing only a walk and a hit. That hit though is a grand slam off NAS MR Jim Cushing (0-0, 6.98 ERA).
July 19 – The Thunder pick up SP Zach Weaver (4-7, 4.33 ERA) from the Miners in exchange for INF/CF Jeff Becker (.263, 1 HR, 39 RBI).
July 21 – The Canadiens send SP Kevin Woodworth (3-11, 5.99 ERA) to the Condors for some oddball prospect.
July 23 – The Indians’ 5-run first inning would not carry them to victory, being trumped by the Knights’ 8-run third frame before long. The Knights hold on to win, 12-10, although IND C Justin Calhoun (.200, 3 HR, 23 RB) would lead the day with two hits, two walks, and 5 RBI, all of the runs scoring on a pair of homers against ATL SP Chris Chatfield (1-5, 3.25 ERA).

Complaints and stuff

12 shutouts. We have already played 12 games in which we didn’t score at all. That is a substantial amount, and I am extremely hesitant to collect data to compare this to other horrendous seasons.

It occurs to me that we have a very young pitching staff. There’s Lillis, who is 35, and then the next-oldest guy is... Travis Garrett! Well, after we dumped Adam Cowen for space constraints. Garrett is 27, Cowen is 28.

By the way, no trades are coming. Besides a reliever, we have no real talent on the roster, and nobody wants our relievers. Just so there are no outcries of protectionism or favoritism, I also offered Matt Nunley to a few teams for (mostly random) prospects at the bottom of the top 100, and I didn’t even get in smelling distance of a deal – but I was called names by the Warriors f.e. …

With the series loss in New York this week, we are no longer beating them all-time. It’s an even 420-420 now.

Fun Fact: In 2000, the then-last place Coons went 2-4 in the week ending July 23, remaining in last place. The week included a 14-inning, 4-1 loss to the Titans on Christian Greenman’s walkoff 3-piece, and that guy would turn into another sad chapter in the Brownshirt Chronicles before long, but the main effect of that rotten week was the Sport Illuminated issue with two young raccoons sitting in a tree on the cover, with the text below: "What? We must bat against Martin Garcia?" "Nope, not going to happen. We're not comin' down!" - Is the Raccoons' young talent (pictured: Daniel Sharp, Albert Martin) really ready for the major leagues?

You could run that cover again right now and insert the names of Spencer, Stalker, Alfaro, or whomever.

Besides, Martin Garcia went to the Hall of Fame, Daniel Sharp came and went three times, ultimately going nowhere, and I would murder Al Martin’s career in due time in a stupid trade. What a job well done!

By the way, the lawsuit we brought against the magazine back then was thrown out of court, something First Amendment blah-blah.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (40-58) vs. Condors (47-52) – July 25-27, 2023

The Condors came in with a 2-1 edge in the season series. They were ten games out, which was usually the point where you should just give up in July, but they had already gotten other hints, like sitting fifth in their division (like the Coons), or being stuck in the bottom three in both runs scored and runs allowed in the Continental League.

Projected matchups:
Rico Gutierrez (5-7, 4.23 ERA) vs. Luis Flores (6-6, 3.45 ERA)
Travis Garrett (2-3, 3.54 ERA) vs. Jose Menendez (6-11, 3.06 ERA)
Jesus Chavez (6-10, 4.23 ERA) vs. George Griffin (8-6, 3.90 ERA)

After Monday off again, Tuesday brought a left-handed matchup, and the pitchers’ handedness would also match in the last two games of the set, with four right-handers involved in those.

One Condors regular would be amiss from the lineup in this series, with centerfielder Matt Jamieson (.277, 4 HR, 31 RBI) out for the season with ruptured finger tendons. The Coons also still had a centerfielder (that hadn’t played centerfielder in a while) on the DL. Cookie was not expected back on the field before the weekend and I think we’d try another few warmup games in AAA then. That’s where he got hurt last time around…

Game 1
TIJ: SS B. Rojas – 1B Gershkovich – LF Larios – C Sanford – RF Boggs – CF Hatley – 3B Umpierre – 2B Lawson – P L. Flores
POR: CF Stevenson – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – LF Newman – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – SS Stalker – C Tovias – P Gutierrez

Both teams scratched out a run in the first three innings, with the Coons making a move first. Spencer’s double and Newman’s single got them on the board in the bottom 1st, but Mike Gershkovich’s homer would tie the score in the top of the third. Gutierrez overall was fooling nobody, hit a guy, and looked ripe for a beating. But the Condors didn’t quite get a hold of him, at least not beating style. They scored the go-ahead run in the fifth inning, with leadoff batter David Lawson and Bob Rojas both singling hard to center. Since Lawson had been bunted over by Flores, he scored from second base on Rojas’ single, but the Coons had a comeback opportunity in the bottom of the same inning. Omar Alfaro drew a leadoff walk, after which Flores drilled Tim Stalker outright. Regrettably, the Raccoons would pile up two strikeouts and no base hits after getting their first two batters on, and stranded them both. In turn, a Nunley error cost the Coons an unearned run in the sixth inning, driven in by Lawson with a single to center – again – with two down, and Nunley also continued to fail his way to the nearest paycheck in the bottom 6th with one down and runners on the corners, lining right into Flores’ mitten. Spencer (infield single) and Newman (single) remained put, wisely, after reaching with the crew’s first base hits since the opening inning. That brought up Omar Alfaro for a last chance effort, and maybe – MAYBE – he was slowly becoming accustomed to big league pitching. He belted one to flip the score, a 3-piece to left to set the Coons 4-3 ahead. THE AGE OF OMAR – FEEL IT! FEEL IT!!

Gutierrez had a hard scrabble through seven, allowing nine base hits, then was batted for in the bottom of the seventh with Tovias on second after a leadoff double. Raul Claros grounded out to short in his spot, which kept the runner pinned, and Stevenson won an intentional walk, after which both Spencer and Walter went down on strikes to Luis Flores… Vince D would hold on to the 4-3 edge in the eighth inning, after which we went to Brett Lillis, who struck out Andy McNeal in the ninth, then walked another pinch-hitter, Francisco Ordaz. Adrian Rojas pinch-hit for the other Rojas, grounded to Nunley, but the Coons only got the lead runner. That was their doom. Gershkovich was the first guy that Lillis faced that was not hitting for somebody else, and he creamed a 3-2 pitch for a 2-run homer to left, his second in the game, and 12th on the season. The Coons would nibble no Joel Davis, formerly of their own, who walked Tovias, and allowed a soft 2-out single to Stevenson, but Rey Umpierre would handle Jarod Spencer’s grounder and easily throw him out at first to end the game. 5-4 Condors. Spencer 2-5, 2B; Newman 3-4, RBI; Alfaro 1-3, BB, HR, 3 RBI;

Oh well, this was the first loss of the year for Lillis, his third blown save, and his last decision and blown save had occurred all the way back on May 10 against the Stars, where he had also allowed two runs in a 4-3 game, but back then the Critters had chewed up the ex-Coon to try and save it for Dallas, Quinn MacCarthy.

Game 2
TIJ: SS B. Rojas – 1B McNeal – C Sanford – LF Larios – RF Boggs – CF Hatley – 3B A. Rojas – 2B J. Estrada – P Menendez
POR: 2B Claros – LF Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – CF Stevenson – SS Stalker – C Tovias – P Garrett

Garrett struck out the first pair, then got knocked around quickly. Adrian Rojas and Juan Estrada both hit hard run-scoring base hits to right with two outs in the bottom 2nd, first a single (to score Omar Larios), then a double. After he grounded out to begin the bottom 3rd, Garrett would get support from the top of the order. Claros and Spencer hit singles, but Walter flew out to Larios. Matt Nunley grounded to right, past a lunging Juan Estrada, for an RBI single, and then Alfaro came up again. Omar had batted with two on and two out in the first and had struck out, but he wouldn’t this time, instead mashing his second 3-piece of the series! This one was to right, it flipped the score again, and staked Garrett to a 4-2 lead. For the next few innings, both teams would put runners aboard only to strand them. A Tovias error created a tight spot for Garrett in the fifth, but he struck out Andy McNeal to get out of there. In the bottom 5th, Nunley drew a 2-out walk and Alfaro singled into left, but Stevenson struck out. Garrett cut down on the walks in this game, at least initially. He had one walk and eight strikeouts through six innings, but with one Scavenger down in the seventh lost Adrian Rojas in a full count, then ran a 3-0 count to Estrada, before the opposing second baseman grounded to short in that spot. Stalker couldn’t make the play quickly enough to turn two, and the Condors hit for Menendez here with Gershkovich, yesterday’s killjoy. Estrada stole second base off Tovias, whose CS% kept hovering around 20%, but Garrett lost Gershkovich on balls anyway, which also ended his game. Billy Brotman came in to face Bob Rojas with the tying runs aboard, but the Condors sent Ordaz to pinch-hit for him, a right-hander, and the beginning of the end for Lillis one game ago. Ordaz flew out to center, without panic, however, and the Coons remained 4-2 ahead, even after the bottom 7th despite them loading the bases. Tijuana’s Jeff Little conceded singles to Claros and Nunley, walked Alfaro, but Stevenson grounded out to leave them aboard. Brotman put the tying runs aboard in no time in the eighth, allowing a single to McNeal and walking Sanford. Larios popped out, after which the Critters went to Surginer, who relied on Stevenson to catch up with two flyballs to centerfield to get out of Brotman’s jam, but the Raccoons stranded a pair of their own in the bottom of the inning. Newman and Delgado pinch-hit against Little, landed a single and a walk, and were ignored by the top of the order. It was back to Lillis in the ninth, and this time he held the Condors off the bases completely. 4-2 Coons. Claros 2-5; Nunley 2-2, 2 BB, RBI; Alfaro 2-3, BB, HR, 3 RBI; Newman (PH) 1-1; Garrett 6.2 IP, 4 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 3 BB, 8 K, W (3-3) and 1-3;

Game 3
TIJ: SS B. Rojas – 1B McNeal – C Sanford – LF Larios – RF Boggs – CF Hatley – 3B Umpierre – 2B J. Estrada – P Griffin
POR: 2B Claros – LF Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – CF Stevenson – C Delgado – SS Bullock – P Chavez

After whacking out two and driving in six in the first two games of the set, Omar Alfaro hurt himself on a defensive play right in the first inning and had to be replaced by Zach Graves. The lull of the early innings in which neither team scored gave the Coons plenty of time to wonder why the hell the universe was hating them so hard, until there was the first score of the contest in the bottom of the fourth. With Nunley and Stevenson on base and two down, the Coons’ Tony Delgado and Daniel Bullock would hit grounders near the vicinity of the middle infielders, and neither of them could come up with the ball. Bob Rojas looked bad on Delgado’s RBI single to left, and Estrada looked worse on Bullock’s RBI single to right.

That was all in the first five innings, too, with the Condors only getting three hits off Chavez, all singles, and didn’t transpire into any major threat. The Coons at least put two men on in the bottom 6th, even though that already required an error by Umpierre to get the second man, Delgado, onto base in addition to Graves, who had singled, and then Daniel Bullock smacked hard into a double play anyway. To be fair to Chavez, who carried a 3-hitter through seven, he also had strong defensive support. Stevenson had one amazing catch in centerfield, and Spencer spoiled two potential extra-base hits. Chavez wouldn’t squeeze through eighth thanks to a leadoff single by Estrada. He faced Ordaz, playing center and batting ninth after a double switch, but on his grounder to third Nunley only managed to kill the lead runner. Kipple then replaced Chavez to face the left-handed top of the order. Bob Rojas singled off him, but Adrian Rojas popped out. Cory Dew replaced Kipple to face Sanford, a right-hander, who also popped out to end the inning. Bottom 8th, also traffic: Stevenson hit a 2-out double into the leftfield corner off Jeff Little, then scored on Delgado’s single to left center. Stalker batted for Bullock, walked, and the Coons sent Will Newman to bat for Dew, but to no avail, he grounded out to short. Since the Coons hadn’t moved out of save range at 3-0, and Lillis had suffered in a long successless outing on Tuesday, Vince D got the save opportunity and retired the side in order. Delgado 2-4, 2 RBI; Chavez 7.1 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 4 K, W (7-10);

If the Coons hadn’t brought up the #9 spot in the bottom 8th, Dew would have been in for four outs. Lillis was never on the plate for this one.

Raccoons (42-59) vs. Falcons (38-62) – July 28-30, 2023

The season series with the Falcons, one of five teams more rotten than the Coons, was tied at three, and we were still not clear at how they were even playing .380 ball. They were more games under .500 than runs under .500 with only a -12 run differential against them. They were just below league average in both runs scored and runs allowed. They had to be under the mother of all gypsy curses there…

Projected matchups:
Matt Huf (1-7, 4.83 ERA) vs. Jim Bryant (3-6, 4.03 ERA)
Chris McKendrick (3-5, 3.35 ERA) vs. Justin Fleming (5-8, 4.80 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (5-7, 4.14 ERA) vs. Kyle Anderson (10-10, 3.73 ERA)

Three right-handers! There was something new about the Falcons roster, though, as they had just picked up OF/1B Terry Kopp (.312, 10 HR, 56 RBI) from the Capitals in exchange for MR Johnny Watson (1-1, 5.28 ERA) and #73 prospect SP Reed Bates. Earlier this week they had already traded LF/RF Matt Owen (.301, 6 HR, 45 RBI) to the Titans in an exchange for INF Tony Casillas (.277, 5 HR, 23 RBI).

Game 1
CHA: 3B Good – 2B Casillas – 1B Fowlkes – RF Kopp – C T. Robinson – SS Read – LF J. Avila – CF LeMoine – P J. Bryant
POR: 2B Claros – LF Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Graves – CF Stevenson – SS Stalker – C Tovias – P Huf

The revamped Falcons order immediately went to work on Huf, who allowed a single to Casillas in the first before loading the bases with walks to Pat Fowlkes and Terry Kopp. Tim Robinson’s sac fly and Howard Read’s RBI single to left center plated two for the Falcons, while the Coons also got two on in the bottom of the inning, Claros and Spencer reaching on singles, but then had Walter fly out to left and Nunley ground hard enough to Casillas for the newly-minted Falcon to turn two.

Huf limped through the innings, hardly missing any bad impression he could make. Chris LeMoine, who had fallen from the top echelon in the last few years, hit a 2-out double in the fourth inning. That was not the issue. The issue was the hard single that Jim Bryant knocked into leftfield. Thankfully the single was hard and kept LeMoine from scoring, with Matt Good grounding out to strand a pair. The Coons had another thing going in the bottom 4th, with Walter and Nunley landing soft 1-out singles. Now, how’d they **** this one up? Not at all, in fact, as Zach Graves got a ball past LeMoine in the depths of centerfield for a 2-run triple, levelling the score. The Portland Portlies wouldn’t stop there. Stevenson singled to left, plating Graves and putting the team 3-2 ahead, and from there the bases quickly became loaded. Huf batted with three on and one out and hit a slow roller on the third base line that refused to go foul and Stevenson managed to dive past Bryant in front of home plate to score as all hands were safe on Huf’s infield single, his second RBI of the year. Claros hit an RBI single, 5-2, before Spencer smacked one to Read for a double play to end the inning with a 5-spot.

Huf responded to the 5-spot with a leadoff walk to Casillas in the top 5th, then struck out the next three batters. Those were the last outs he logged; Read hit a leadoff double to begin the sixth, Jose Avila drew the fifth walk off Huf, and with that we went to David Kipple.There was no relief to be gained from Kipple, though, as the rookie left-hander ran a 3-1 count to LeMoine, then served up a gopherball that was promptly hit all the way over the Rockies for a game-tying 3-spot, 5-5. But we weren’t the only team with a hard time finding relief in the sixth inning. Joel Trotter was a Falcons rookie right-hander, put Stalker aboard, then served up a bomb to Elias Tovias, breaking the tie and restoring the home team to a 7-5 lead.

The Coons had another lefty in trouble in the seventh. A single and a walk put Kopp and Robinson on against Brotman to start the inning, but then Read hit into a double play to short, and Avila grounded out to Claros, denying the Falcons a tally in the inning. Bottom 7th, Trotter was still in, but retired nobody before the bases were loaded on an error (by Good) and two singles. Graves batted the first pitch he saw past a diving Fowlkes for an RBI single, and another run scored on a Fowlkes error on Stevenson’s grounder. New pitcher George Barnett conceded a bases-clearing double to Tim Stalker, which put the Coons at 12-5 with two 5-spots, their biggest offensive game of the season! Barnett would get two out, then got two more on the board on Raul Claros’ homer, handing the Coons a 7-spot and a handy win. 14-5 Furballs! Claros 3-5, HR, 3 RBI; Walter 3-4, BB; Nunley 2-4; Graves 2-5, 3B, 3 RBI; Stevenson 2-5, 2B, 2 RBI; Cowen 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K;

Whoah, we’re now almost scoring 3.5 runs per game!

By the way, still no word on recently-awakened slugger Omar Alfaro… MENA!! MENA!!!! … No clue where he is. – Slappy says he sent him to gather ‘herbs’.

Great.

Game 2
CHA: SS Good – 3B Czachor – 1B Fowlkes – RF Kopp – C T. Robinson – LF McClenon – 2B Casillas – CF LeMoine – P Fleming
POR: 2B Claros – LF Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Graves – CF Stevenson – SS Stalker – C Tovias – P McKendrick

Starting with Good and Ryan Czachor, the Falcons slapped four singles off McKendrick in the opening inning, which quickly led to two runs on the board on our rookie du jour. McKendrick would not fool anybody in this start and the Falcons regularly made hard contact. The Falcons had seven hits off him by the third inning, and nine by the fifth. Corner infielders hit solo home runs for either team, Matt Nunley going deep in the bottom 2nd and Pat Fowlkes homering in the top 3rd, before the Falcons got doubles from Good and Fowlkes in the fifth to tack on another run in a 4-1 game. Stevenson went deep in the bottom 5th, but that was also a solo home run in what was now a 4-2 deficit in which the Coons had only one base hit that had not entitled the hitter to circle the bases…

McKendrick would not get through the sixth, and as was good custom for Raccoons pitchers by now got stuffed with a 2-out run by the opposing hurler. Fleming’s single to right center scored Joseph McClenon to restore a 3-run lead, and it was 6-2 by the seventh with Kevin Surginer getting bounced around for two hits and two walks, and it would have been worse if not for Terry Kopp’s double play grounder in between the four base runners. One day after their 14 runs the Raccoons would not get a fourth base hit until the bottom 7th, with Nunley leading off with a single to right. Nothing would come of that… It only got worse. Cory Dew was in to pitch the eighth, but sucked even worse than anybody before him. The Falcons 1-through-5 batters, after LeMoine and Fleming made outs, would all reach base against him on two hits, a walk, and finally not one, but TWO hit batters. Brotman replaced Dew, who’s ERA was skyrocketing like nothing we had seen before, and got McClenon to pop out, ending that dismal inning. The Coons would strafe a tiring Fleming for three runs in the bottom 8th, although two were unearned after a Good error. The Falcons seemingly tried to save some pen after the drubbing on Friday, and it certainly didn’t do Fleming any good, but Ryan Corkum would sit down the Coons in order in the bottom 9th. 8-5 Falcons. Nunley 2-3, HR, 2 RBI; Stevenson 2-4, HR, RBI;

It took him four weeks and some ‘herbs’, but the Druid finally diagnosed Omar Alfaro (.254, 9 HR, 34 RBI) with a strained hamstring. Off to the DL with our future, and he’d probably miss most of August.

We’d add an extra reliever for two or three days – Mike Rehbock – until we’d bring back Cookie from rehab-rehab.

Game 3
CHA: SS Good – 3B Czachor – 1B Fowlkes – CF Kopp – 2B Casillas – C Roland – CF LeMoine – LF McClenon – P K. Anderson
POR: 2B Claros – LF Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – CF Stevenson – RF Newman – SS Stalker – C Delgado – P Gutierrez

The Coons’ daily mess was Gutierrez on Sunday, and Rico ran four full counts in the first inning, including to all of the 1-2-3 batters, resulting in a K, groundout, and single. Kopp also singled, Gutierrez threw a wild one, and Casillas grounded out to Claros in a 3-2 count after that, stranding the runners and putting nothing on the board after some 30 pitches by Gutierrez… If nothing else, Gutierrez drove in the first run of the game, singling home Tim Stalker, who had also singled and stolen second base, in the bottom 3rd. Claros singled, Spencer erased him on a fielder’s choice, and with two outs Shane Walter’s soft line dropped in front of LeMoine in right center for an RBI single. Matt Nunley had landed his 100th hit of the season in his first at-bat of the day and got #101 with men on the corners, running a 2-out, 2-run double into the rightfield corner to extend the lead to 4-0. A walk and a single would even load the bases, but Stalker would fly out to right to end the inning after starting it, nine batters earlier.

The moment he had a lead, Gutierrez sawed off the Falcons in the fourth and fifth, but both Good and Fowlkes hit singles in the sixth inning. Gutierrez was at 104 pitches when he faced Terry Kopp with one out, who smacked the first pitch he got into Stalker’s glove to start a 6-4-3 double play stress-reliever, and that was also the last pitch for Gutierrez in the game. Top 7th, Cory Dew again got stuck, although Tim Stalker also had a hand in a jam with runners on the corners. He threw away Cory Roland’s grounder for a 2-base error, and Joseph McClenon also reached base. Brotman came on with two outs to face Jose Avila, pinch-hitting for Anderson, allowed an RBI single (unearned), and only ended the inning with a K to Good. The Raccoons were still up 4-1, despite being completely invisible in the middle innings. Vince D walked Czachor to begin the eighth before Newman handled Fowlkes’ fly for the first out. Czachor went in a full count to Kopp, who swung through strike three and Delgado threw out Czachor to end the inning. While the Coons’ offense managed to sleepwalk themselves through their last four batting innings, Brett Lillis held the lead together in the ninth, retiring Casillas, Roland, and LeMoine in order to grab the weekend series, the season series, and a winning week for the Critters. 4-1 Furballs. Spencer 2-4; Nunley 2-4, 2B, 2 RBI; Gutierrez 6.0 IP, 6 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 7 K, W (6-7) and 1-2, RBI;

In other news

July 25 – Nashville’s John Muller (.356, 4 HR, 17 RBI) elevates himself to a 20-game winning streak and loses it, all in a day, in the Blue Sox’ double header with the Warriors, which ends in a split overall for the teams as well.
July 25 – A home run by TOP C Jon Gilbert (.212, 3 HR, 10 RBI) lifts Nick Danieley (6-6, 3.24 ERA) and the rest of the Buffaloes to a 1-0 win over the Gold Sox.
July 26 – WAS 3B/SS Guillermo Obando (.279, 4 HR, 28 RBI) is going to miss two weeks with a strained quad.
July 27 – The Indians trade SP Mario Alva (6-10, 3.49 ERA) to the Scorpions for two prospects.
July 27 – SAL OF/1B/2B Raimondo Odescalchi (.254, 10 HR, 43 RBI) will be out for a month with a strained back muscle.
July 28 – The Gold Sox send SP Joao Joo (5-8, 3.76 ERA) to the Miners for RF/LF Max Erickson (.309, 3 HR, 9 RBI).
July 28 – Pacifics and Capitals play 17 innings before the Capitals break through in the top 17th with LF/RF Luis Leija (.231, 0 HR, 1 RBI) driving home the deciding run for his first RBI of the season, giving Washington a 6-5 win.
July 29 – WAS SS Tom McWhorter (.280, 13 HR, 51 RBI) lands his 2,000th base hit in a 7-6 loss to the Pacifics, a ninth-inning home run off LAP MR Rob Owensby (2-2, 2.16 ERA) in the middle of a 4-run rally that just falls short of the goal. McWhorter, 35 years old and a 12-time All Star and twice named FL Player of the Year, has been with the Capitals since 2020. He spent the first 12 years of his career with the Miners. He’s a career .275 batter with 299 HR and 1,183 RBI.
July 29 – The Cyclones’ SP Victor Arevalo (7-8, 4.37 ERA) is traded to the Wolves for MR Alex Ramos (5-3, 4.39 ERA, 1 SV).
July 30 – Bad news for the Scorpions, with LF/RF Pablo Sanchez (.373, 7 HR, 52 RBI) going to miss three weeks with an oblique strain.
July 30 – The Scorpions are also active otherwise, stunningly trading franchise figurehead, outfielder Ray Meade (.267, 9 HR, 48 RBI) to the Rebels for 1B Jesus Ramirez, who was batting .286 in limited action as a 37-year-old veteran, and #18 prospect OF Eric Payne.

Complaints and stuff

Not much to say this week. It speaks to the perpetual numbing drama around this place that the second Omar Alfaro appeared to break out (five homers and a .395 batting average since July 7) he ripped up his leg. Poor Maud – just when she had his bobblehead for some forgettable September game worked out.

Cookie did not yet get hurt on rehab-rehab, but I’m not holding my breath.

And no, there is still nobody trying to trade for any of our personnel. There’s normally always the one young player that everybody would like to get from you … or at least an early-30s regular All Star. Not on this roster. I haven’t had an inquiry the entire month, and shopping personnel or trying to talk GM’s directly has reaped no fruit whatsoever.

A roster full of Clyde Bradys… worst offense… you’d think the rotation is pretty lackluster, but Huf aside right now all the starters have a sub-4 ERA, even if just barely. But the offense is a nightmare, a pile of .250 batters that don’t walk and have no power. Except Alfaro. Maybe. Who knows? Maybe we’ll never know. I’d like nothing more than a Royce Green type of player to rip up the league.

Fun Fact: Six years ago this week, on July 28, 2017, Tijuana’s Jimmy Eichelkraut hit three home runs in a 17-6 rout of the Crusaders, becoming the Condors’ third-ever player to hit three home runs in a game.

Of course Jimmy Oatmeal was the #3 pick by the Raccoons in the 2006 draft – we haven’t had a higher pick since. He never suited up for Portland, because his performance in the low minors was ghastly after the draft, and while named the #67 prospect prior to the 2008 season was a running gag well before getting close to the majors.

With the Coons in the hunt for real in ’08 and in need of offense, Jimmy Oatmeal found himself included in the package that included Daniel Sharp and Ryan Miller in the trade for the Indians’ Ron Alston. The gamble failed in the short term – the Coons wouldn’t make the playoffs until 2010 – and the Indians also would not hold on to Jimmy for very long, swapping him to Tijuana for Jimmy Sjogren before the end of ’08. His struggles in the minors were profound, he didn’t make his major league debut until age 24 – late for a #3 pick for sure! – and didn’t grab more than a token number of at-bats until 26 during the 2014 season, batting .209 with three homers in 151 AB. He would be a regular by ’15 and a starter by ’16, and would actually be a productive batter by 28. That year, 2016, was arguably his best season as he batted .285 with 31 homers and also stole 13 bases.

A 2-time All Star, Jimmy Oatmeal fell from the All Star level by ’20, batting .243 with 24 homers at age 32, but that was only a .706 OPS for him, a steep drop after five seasons over .800. It was also his last full season in the majors. He tore his labrum on May 17, 2021 after a slow start to the season, and retired before the end of the year, finishing with a .266/.349/.466 clip with 158 HR and 510 RBI in less than eight years of major league service.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (44-60) @ Knights (59-45) – July 31-August 2, 2023

The Knights had already grabbed the season series over the Critters, 5-1, and they had to keep on beating them up, making a move for their second playoff appearance in three years. Second in runs scored in the league and fifth in runs allowed, there was still one major flaw to their game, which was the CL’s worst bullpen with an ERA that was almost five, almost unbelievably bad for a team in first place. Listen, Knights, it’s July 31 and I might have a reliever to spare for prosp- no? No? Really? Look at this guy here! (squeezes Brett Lillis’ jaw from the sides to lay bare his teeth) Almost as good as new! Still no?

Projected starters:
Travis Garrett (3-3, 3.46 ERA) vs. Leon Hernandez (8-7, 3.24 ERA)
Jesus Chavez (7-10, 3.97 ERA) vs. Jonathan Ryan (9-4, 3.51 ERA)
Matt Huf (1-7, 4.99 ERA) vs. Brian Cope (13-6, 3.18 ERA)

Three right-handers; Ryan had recently moved back out of the pen with lefty Danny Martin (8-6, 3.10 ERA, 2 SV) to take over the closer’s role in which the team had seen about zero success so far, but that also looked like a butcher’s way of dealing with a sore toe…

Still no juicy prospects for Lillis? No?

The Coons will not have an off day again until the 10th, so we will weave in some off days for the regulars either in this set or against the Loggers on the weekend. We also start a 2-week road trip and won’t be home again until the 15th.

Game 1
POR: 2B Claros – LF Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Newman – SS Stalker – C Tovias – CF Santos – P Garrett
ATL: RF Stuckey – 3B Farias – C Luna – 1B Avalos – 2B T. Jimenez – LF M. Reyes – 2B Hibbard – CF Folk – P L. Hernandez

While the Coons had Walter and Nunley snip 2-out singles in the first only for Will Newman to strike out, the Knights drew a leadoff walk via Johnny Stuckey in the bottom 1st. Emilio Farias hit into a double play, but “Tragic” Travis was *insisting* and walked Ruben Luna. Tony Jimenez flew out to center. The Knights wouldn’t put another man on this time through, with Garrett whiffing three at the bottom of the order, but Stuckey singled with two outs in the third. The rightfielder stole his 11th base off the sleepy Elias Tovias, who was more and more not appearing to be the next big catcher and more and more like the next David Vinson (just without the initial flash) … or Bob Wood. Garrett walked Farias, and Tovias’ passed ball advanced the runners, but Luna struck out in a full count… Tovias garnered even more fans in the manager’s suite when he led off the fifth inning by knocking a ball to centerfield for what he considered a double, but ex-****ing-Elk Brody Folk very much and rightfully so considered a single. Tovias was thrown out at second and I was going through our depth chart at his position. Folk also managed to manufacture the Knights’ first run of the game (and of course the first run overall…) in the bottom 5th, drawing a leadoff walk off Garrett (walk #5 for him in the game), stole second base against Tovias’ pathetic throw, and came home on Emilio Farias’ single to center, which also gave Farias a 19-game hitting streak.

Garrett made it six, both whiffing and walking as many against two base knocks – if he wasn’t such a complete ****ing ***, he’d actually be a pretty half-decent pitcher. Alas, the Coons couldn’t have nice things, such as a good pitcher, or at least one ****ing run’s worth of offense by the seventh inning. At least Tim Stalker reached scoring position to make the Knights nominally uncomfortable, even if that was only with two outs after a walk and a stolen base. Well, he ain’t gonna steal his way all the way around, so how bad can it get, they probably wondered. It didn’t get very bad. Tovias flew out to Stuckey pretty reliably, which was a .225 batter’s thing. At least there were good news for the Knights: Hernandez went eight, and Danny Martin saved the game without trouble. 1-0 Knights. Garrett 6.0 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 6 BB, 6 K, L (3-4);

…and my weeping pillow is back in Portland.

The Coons had four hits by the third inning, and never another one after that. They also pitched Mike Rehbock for a scoreless eighth, only for Rehbock to be in pain afterwards. Without waiting out the diddling Druid, Rehbock was moved to the DL and the Coons were reunited with the Cookieman as soon as August broke.

Game 2
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Graves – SS Spencer – CF Stevenson – C Tovias – P Chavez
ATL: RF Stuckey – 3B Farias – C Luna – 1B Avalos – SS T. Jimenez – LF M. Reyes – 2B Hibbard – CF Folk – P Ryan

Letting your pitcher dive headfirst into first base to beat out the other pitcher’s throw and get a 2-out run home from third base was one way to get on the board, and for some teams it was the only way. Spencer scored on Chavez’ heroics in the second inning for the first counter in the game, and after that Cookie singled in Elias Tovias for a second run. Cookie, who was only playing in his 52nd game of the year, had already opened the game with a double in the first inning, but had been ignored by the middle of the order. Chavez wasn’t the only pitcher to drive in a run in the second inning, though. After Claros popped out to end the top 2nd, the bottom 2nd saw another peculiar control display by Chavez, who ended up behind most batters, walked two and allowed one hit until he arrived at Jonathan Ryan, who ticked a ball into shallow center to plate the Knights’ first run of the game, plating Marty Reyes. Ruben Luna came close to a homer in the bottom 3rd, which would have been his 19th, doubled off the fence and was driven in by Tony Jimenez with a 2-out single instead, tying the score at two.

Through five, Cookie remained unretired by drawing a leadoff walk against Ryan. While Claros quickly forced him out with a grounder and Shane Walter struck out, consecutive singles to center by Nunley and Graves scored a run to restore the Coons to the lead, 3-2, at least for a couple of minutes. The bottom of the inning saw Chavez get blasted without getting an out, with Johnny Stuckey lining up the rightfield line for a leadoff double, then scoring on Farias’ single, which gave the third baseman a 20-game hitting streak. Ruben Luna then actually did hit his 19th, a 440-foot monster to dead center that put Chavez in 5-3 arrears. So there was a hook for Chavez to dangle from, but the Coons would bring up the tying runs in the seventh, when Claros and Nunley were stranded when Stuckey caught Graves’ soft line to right, and again in the eighth, and that was an even better opportunity. Spencer hit a leadoff single past Devin Hibbard, then came all the way around to score on Josh Stevenson’s double into the gap in left-center. Nobody out, the tying run 180 feet away! He would only move another 90 feet, and that was on a wild pitch… The ninth saw the 2-3-4 batters and right-hander Mike Cockcroft, a 4.32 ERA and many walks per nine innings. Claros flew out to right, Walter walked indeed, and Nunley hit into a double play. 5-4 Knights. Carmona 2-4, BB, 2B, RBI; Nunley 2-4, BB; Spencer 2-4; Stevenson 1-2, 2 BB, 2B, RBI;

Game 3
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – RF Graves – 3B Nunley – 1B Delgado – SS Stalker – CF Stevenson – C Tovias – P Huf
ATL: 2B Hibbard – 3B Farias – C Luna – 1B Avalos – SS T. Jimenez – LF M. Reyes – RF A. Sauceda – CF Folk – P Cope

Bases loaded in the top 1st thanks to a Cookie walk and singles by Spencer and Nunley, but Tony Delgado hit into a double play to keep the Coons from scoring… Stevenson hit into a double play in the second, and the third saw Huf with a leadoff single, Cookie reaching on an error, and the next three batters not moving them an inch, in other words, same old, same old. The Knights took the lead in the bottom 3rd thanks to 2-out heroics by Luna, who doubled, and Tony Avalos, who singled him in. There was a 20-minute rain delay before the fourth inning, but it was not really serious weather … just my tears.

Huf struck out with Stevenson and Tovias on base after 2-out singles in the fourth, but I wasn’t exactly planning on Huf to drive in runs, but more like… don’t get shackled? In the bottom 4th, he got shackled. Marty Reyes led off with a double to center, after which Alex Sauceda and Brody Folk hit back-to-back RBI triples into the right-center gap. Brian Cope’s flair to left dropped for an RBI single and ran the score to 4-0. Hibbard and Luna would hit singles, two more runs scored in the inning, and by the time the Knights were done with their 5-spot and 6-0 lead we were basically ready to board the plane.

Top 6th, minor distraction as Cope issued walks to Nunley and Delgado to start the frame. Tim Stalker was on his post, hitting into a double play, and Stevenson choked in a full count. Elias Tovias hit a leadoff jack in the seventh, which was nothing that made the home crowd nervous, but even though they were still down 6-1 the Cons would bring the tying run to the plate in the inning. Shane Walter’s pinch-hit double was followed by two outs, but then Graves singled him in. Nunley also singled, and when Newman batted for Delgado, another single dropped into leftfield, scoring another run, before Tim Stalker lined out to short to keep the score at 6-3, and despite Cory Dew allowing another run in the bottom of the eighth inning, the Coons would bring closer Danny Martin into a 7-3 game pretty soon. Dave Butler, one of many former starters the Knights tried to make work in the bullpen, allowed a ninth-inning leadoff single to Spencer, then hit Graves to put two on with nobody out. When Nunley hit a hard RBI double, the Knights were in trouble, because Raul Claros pinch-hit for Dew in the #5 spot as the tying run and still nobody out. Claros lined a ball up the leftfield line for a 2-run double, the Knights were ready to fall … and then didn’t. Clinging onto the 7-6 lead with the tips of his fingernails, Martin got soft flies from Stalker and Stevenson for two outs, and Tovias popped out lamely altogether to end the game and seal a 3-game sweep consisting of three 1-run games. 7-6 Knights. Spencer 2-5; Nunley 3-4, BB, 2B, RBI; Newman (PH) 1-1, RBI; Claros (PH) 1-1, 2B, 2 RBI; Tovias 2-5, HR, RBI; Walter (PH) 2-2, 2 2B;

Raccoons (44-63) @ Loggers (61-45) – August 3-6, 2023

The Loggers were probably not happy to see the roughed-up Raccoons arriving at their place, despite them sitting in second place themselves and having a 3-game winning streak going. The Coons had so far won five of six games this year against the Loggers, which was hard to explain without resorting a certain handle making the rounds on Twatbook routinely called ‘LOLggers’. They were fifth in runs pushed across, fourth in runs pushed across against, and were still not sure how to avoid disaster.

Projected matchups:
Chris McKendrick (3-6, 3.79 ERA) vs. Morgan Shepherd (10-8, 3.95 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (6-7, 3.94 ERA) vs. Pedro Hernandez (7-10, 3.32 ERA)
Travis Garrett (3-4, 3.30 ERA) vs. Jorge Villalobos (9-11, 3.81 ERA)
Jesus Chavez (7-11, 4.17 ERA) vs. Michael Foreman (13-2, 2.38 ERA)

Four more right-handed pitchers in this series … where have all the southpaws gone?

Game 1
POR: RF Carmona – LF Spencer – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – SS Stalker – 3B Bullock – C Tovias – CF Santos – P McKendrick
MIL: SS Tadlock – 2B March – CF Coleman – RF Gore – C Wool – 3B A. Velez – LF de Santiago – 1B A. Esquivel – P Shepherd

Cookie walked, stole, scored in the first inning, with Jarod Spencer doing the honors with a single to center, gaining an extra base on Ian Coleman’s throw home before being stranded by the middle of the order. Cookie in turn threw out Ron Tadlock at home plate in the bottom 1st as the opposing shortstop tried to score from first base on Coleman’s 1-out double to the fence in rightfield. While the Coons went on to score two fluke runs in the next few innings, one in the third on a 2-out triple by Shane Walter, and one more in the fifth when Cookie came home on a passed ball charged to Josh Wool, the Loggers would consistently poke and tickle McKendrick, put at least one man on in each of the first five innings, landed eight base hits in total, yet wouldn’t score a single run off him. Bottom 6th, Alberto Velez hit a double to left with one out, and then things stalled again. Carlos de Santiago struck out, and Antonio Esquivel’s fly to left was no challenge for Spencer.

The Loggers fell apart a bit in the seventh inning, which began with Cookie’s single to left, then a Spencer double over the head of de Santiago. Claros’ sac fly kicked Shepherd from the 4-0 game, and base hits by walter and Stalker kept advancing the score to 6-0. Bullock hit a double, but Stalker was held with two down and a 6-run lead, and both were stranded when Tovias popped out to Dan March. McKendrick would not be scored upon; he logged two more outs on the Loggers in the bottom 7th before March reached with an infield single. David Kipple replaced the starter, allowed a first-pitch double to Ian Coleman, but this time the Loggers held their man at third base, and Brad Gore grounded out to strand the runners, and they wouldn’t push one across after that inning, either. 7-0 Coons. Spencer 2-5, 2B, RBI; Walter 4-5, 3B, 2 RBI; McKendrick 6.2 IP, 10 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 4 K, W (4-6);

Game 2
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Newman – SS Stalker – CF Stevenson – C Delgado – P Gutierrez
MIL: SS Tadlock – 2B Stewart – CF Coleman – RF Gore – C Wool – 3B A. Velez – LF Beckwith – 1B A. Esquivel – P P. Hernandez

Through five innings the game would be tied at one. Both teams had scored in the third inning, the Coons plating Spencer with a Walter double after Spencer stole his 20th base of the season, and the Loggers getting a 2-out RBI single from Ron Tadlock to plate Antonio Esquivel. Both teams had only three hits apiece, and there were seven strikeouts in the game, but those were all on Hernandez’ ledger. Gutierrez had not whiffed anybody through five, but had instead gotten three foul pop outs, including two in a row in the second inning. The Coons were nominally in business in the sixth inning, in which Pedro Hernandez loaded the bases with Critters with nobody out, issuing two walks and a single between Nunley, Newman, and Stalker. But … they didn’t score… AGAIN. Stevenson’s fly to left was too shallow and Nunley too slow to test Myles Beckwith’s arm, and Delgado smacked a ball right at Tadlock for a double play. The Loggers would then take Gutierrez apart in just three pitches in the bottom of the inning. Tyler Stewart singled, and Ian Coleman whacked a 444-footer to centerfield to put them 3-1 ahead. The Coons? More double plays, because more is always better, right? RIGHT?? Spencer hit into a double play to kill off Cookie in the seventh. Top 8th, Walter got hit by a fastball to bring up Nunley as the tying run with nobody out, and Matt flew into the rightfield corner for a double. Those were the tying runs in scoring position, but why am I even getting worked up about it? Newman, the old fart, struck out, after which Zach Graves batted for Stalker, just for the sake of a left-handed bat. He flew out to Beckwith, shallow again, and Shane Walter also had no speed, so no advance, no run, but two down. There was one more left-hander available on the bench. Raul Claros batted for Josh Stevenson, cracked a single to right, and THAT tied the ballgame and got rid of Hernandez. Gutierrez worked his way through the eighth inning and was rewarded with the W for it – Cookie drew a 1-out walk, then flung the paws when Shane Walter doubled into the gap in right center for a 2-out RBI double. Lillis sealed the deal for him. 4-3 Furballs. Carmona 2-4, BB; Walter 2-4, 2 2B, 2 RBI; Claros (PH) 1-1, 2 RBI; Gutierrez 8.0 IP, 7 H, 3 R, 3 ER, 1 BB, 2 K, W (7-7);

I never want to play anybody but the Loggers, ever again.

Game 3
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Graves – SS Stalker – CF Stevenson – C Tovias – P Garrett
MIL: SS Tadlock – 2B March – CF Coleman – RF Gore – C Wool – 3B A. Velez – LF de Santiago – 1B A. Esquivel – P Villalobos

In an eventful first time through the Loggers order, Garrett walked three, whiffed three, Claros made an error, and Villalobos bunted into a double play. It all amounted to just two innings, but at least no hits, no runs for the Loggers, although the Coons were also dry early on. Villalobos allowed two base hits early, but faced the minimum the first time through thanks to Stalker getting caught stealing in the second, and Walter hitting into a double play before that, and Walter would be the bloke again in the bottom of the third, misfiring Dan March’s grounder into the hustling Garrett’s rear for a 2-base throwing error while Ron Tadlock, who had singled to center to begin the inning and swiped his 24th base, came home to score. March scored on consecutive fly outs to center, giving the Loggers a wholly unearned 2-0 lead. Cookie shagged a hard liner by March with two outs in the next inning to end the bottom 4th, stranding two in scoring position, but the Critters didn’t get back onto base until the fifth inning when Nunley singled up the middle leading off. He almost got doubled off when Gore unexpectedly caught Graves’ blooper just off the turf, but then did score on Stevenson’s 2-out double into the leftfield corner. The Loggers got out of that inning with their 2-1 lead alive by walking Tovias intentionally and getting Garrett to ground out to Alberto Velez.

Garrett lasted the Critters six-plus and was removed after Tadlock’s leadoff single in the bottom 7th. With lots and lots and ever more left-handers coming up, the ball went to Billy Brotman. In a confusing inning that was not that easy to score on paper, Tadlock stole #25, but was thrown out at third base on March’s bunt, a neat play by Tovias. Brotman walked Coleman, while Gore grounded to first, with Walter throwing the ball to second base for the only out to be claimed there and leaving runners on the corners for Josh Wool with two outs. Wool singled cleanly to right to score March, 3-1, before Nunley handled Velez’ grounder to end the inning. On to the eighth, where on August 5 the Raccoons got their first double-dinger hero of the season as Elias Tovias hit a leadoff jack to cut the gap back to a single run. Cookie got aboard, but was caught stealing, and after Brotman walked de Santiago to begin the bottom 8th, Cory Dew’s unraveling continued unabated. Dew allowed singles to both Esquivel and PH Dave Padilla, with Esquivel being caught in a rundown on the latter while de Santiago scored, 4-2. Dew issued another walk before getting out of the inning – another ghastly outing, and he had plenty ever since coming back from injury. Walter, Nunley, and Newman went down in order in the ninth against Tim Dunkin, and the Loggers gasped audibly, having avoided a looming sweep at home for now, and would be able towards salvaging a split tomorrow. 4-2 Loggers. Tovias 1-2, BB, HR, RBI; Garrett 6.0 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 0 ER, 3 BB, 5 K, L (3-5);

Game 4
POR: RF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF Spencer – SS Stalker – C Tovias – CF Santos – P Chavez
MIL: SS Tadlock – 2B March – CF Coleman – RF Gore – C Wool – 3B A. Velez – LF de Santiago – 1B A. Esquivel – P Foreman

The former Raccoon Foreman was crashed for five hits and as many runs in the first inning. The onslaught started with three singles by the first three batters, with Cookie scoring on Walter’s grounder to center. Nunley and Spencer both hit into force plays at second base, leading to a second run, Stalker doubled over de Santiago, and then Tovias ripped a 3-piece to right. So there was a 5-0 lead for Chavez, who quickly set about to blow it, bit by bit. De Santiago took him deep for a solo job in the bottom 2nd, and the Loggers got a leadoff walk and then a few hard hits to score two runs in the bottom 4th, including a 2-out RBI single by Esquivel that scored Wool from second base. It was a no-win situation for the Coons there, because they knew that Foreman was probably not going to bat. Put the extra man on? We didn’t, and in the event that was the wrong choice, with Jon Berntson popping out to short to end the inning, now in a 5-3 game.

The Raccoons had stranded Spencer and Stalker on the corners in the third inning and then didn’t pop into action again until the sixth. Stalker led off with a walk drawn against Luis Calderon, then moved to second when Tovias grounded out. Frank Santos pushed a grounder past Dan March into centerfield for a single, Stalker turned third and made for home with vigor, and also with success. Since that drew a throw, Santos advanced to second base, but would be stranded as Chavez and Cookie both grounded out. That extra run didn’t make it through the bottom half of the sixth inning, which Brad Gore led off with a triple into the gap. The Loggers got him in, and 2-out singles by de Santiago and Esquivel also got Chavez out … of the game, to be precise. Kipple replaced him, facing PH Terry Harris, and hanging a K on the .174 batter to deny the tying runs aboard from doing damage in the 6-4 game, but Kipple fell fast apart in the next inning. Leadoff single by Tadlock, a 4-pitch walk to March, and then Loggers hit into three groundouts, which was just that wee bit of offensive prowess too little to tie the score; March was left on third base, now with the Coons gripping onto their increasingly skinny 6-5 edge. The Critters stranded their insurance run on third base in the ninth. Alex Hichez allowed a pinch-hit double to the fence to Graves, threw a wild one, but the Coons still couldn’t pull through, with Stevenson striking out in the #9 hole before taking the field. Brett Lillis issued a 4-pitch walk to begin the bottom 9th, then allowed hard drives to center and left. Somehow – SOMEHOW – Coons were on either end of those balls, with Cookie in right looking on and being glad he was playing out of the way. The tying run was still on first base, two down, and Tyler Stewart, all .246 and two homers of him, were pinch-hitting and drawing another 4-pitch walk. After a major crisis meeting on the mound involving every Coon around the infield and even Cookie who came dashing in from right (as he was most likely able to throw out anybody approaching home plate). Matt Nunley, who was one of the team leaders due to seniority and also sick of losing barked at everybody including Lillis – the oldest guy on the roster in fact – that **** had to ****ing stop right here. He had a dinner reservation and no time for 15 innings! And the next batter was indeed the last batter of the game. Alberto Velez’ homer walked off the Loggers, and spared them a series loss to the miserable Coons. 8-6 Loggers. Carmona 2-5; Claros 2-5, 2B; Walter 2-4, BB, RBI; Stalker 2-3, BB, 2B; Graves (PH) 1-1, 2B;

I wonder whether Matt is happy now.

Ah, he’s got food, he’s surely blessed.

In other news

July 31 – Season over for the Aces’ C Errol Spears (.202, 6 HR, 23 RBI). The 38-year-old has suffered a hip muscle strain.
July 31 – The same old man’s ailment – hip strain – fells SAL LF/RF Justin Dally (.305, 23 HR, 79 RBI) as well. Dally, 35, is also out for the season.
August 1 – No-hitter!! The Canadiens don’t see any light at the end of the tunnel in their 4-0 loss to the Thunder’s SP Bryan Hanson (3-4, 3.58 ERA) on Tuesday. Hanson walks two and allows no hits, notching the 46th no-hitter in league history and also becoming the third pitcher with two no-hitters to his name, joining Henry Selph and Brian Furst, the latter of which also spun both of his no-hitters for Oklahoma City. The Thunder have five no-hitters in total, all since 2008.
August 2 – NYC INF Sergio Valdez (.314, 4 HR, 28 RBI) will miss the rest of the month with shoulder tendinitis.
August 3 – SAL OF/1B Abel Mora (.295, 7 HR, 42 RBI) should also miss a month with a hamstring strain.
August 3 – The Blue Sox out-hit the Miners 12-5 in 11 innings, but still fall to them on a walkoff homer by PIT 1B Josh Keen (.332, 12 HR, 59 RBI). The Miners win 4-3.
August 4 – The hitting streak of ATL 3B/2B Emilio Farias (.305, 0 HR, 40 RBI) ends at 22 games in a 6-5 loss to the Bayhawks.
August 4 – After breaking his kneecap, TIJ 1B Andy McNeal (.326, 2 HR, 15 RBI) will definitely miss the rest of the season.
August 4 – SAC RF Josh Fields (.304, 2 HR, 9 RBI) staves off a no-hitter against his team with an RBI double in the Scorpions’ 3-2 loss to the Wolves. SAL SP Nate Delli Quadri (9-7, 3.13 ERA) and four relievers will not allow any other base knocks in a combined 1-hitter.
August 5 – More and more injuries: SFW SP Mike Fernandez (9-9, 3.12 ERA) will miss the rest of the year with a torn rotator cuff.

Complaints and stuff

Still waiting for the Coons to get no-hit in consecutive games or something, you know, some real, utmost shame that will resonate for decades. But as long as the Elks are around, we’re not the worst laughing stocks and the go-to punchline for eager late night talkshow hosts running out of ways to ridicule celebrities.

Which is also a new low, I guess; ‘at least the Elks are still sucking harder than us’ was never printed on t-shirts. – Maud! – Maud! – Should be print that on t-shirts? – Maud says no.

Mike Rehbock was diagnosed with back spasms and will miss the entire month, so he was well placed on the DL to begin with.

We ended up 1-8 against the Knights this year, which is our first 1-8 effort against a CL South team since 2012, when the Thunder held us to a token win.

Fun Fact: Facing a lineup consisting of 1B Quebell – 3B Merritt – RF Alston – LF Pruitt – 2B Nomura – CF Trevino – C Bowen – SS Howell – P Cruz 13 years ago this Saturday, on August 5, 2010, the Elks’ Juichi Fujita no-hit the Raccoons in Portland.

What fun.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (46-65) @ Indians (54-58) – August 7-9, 2023

With splendid chances to lose ten games on a four-town trip, the Critters crawled into Indianapolis for a 3-game set starting on Monday, their last games on a 16-day stint without an off day. Off days would be plentiful from here on for them, with a day off every week for the rest of the month. Matt Huf better behave in his Monday start! We’d then play 18 games in 17 days to start the month of September.

The Indians were ninth in runs scored and tenth in runs allowed, so pretty meh overall. “pretty meh” was still good enough to hold the Raccoons to a .333 clip in the season series, which stood 8-4 in favor of the Arrowheads.

Projected matchups:
Matt Huf (1-8, 5.33 ERA) vs. Brandon Smith (2-2, 4.40 ERA)
Chris McKendrick (4-6, 3.41 ERA) vs. Tom Shumway (12-2, 2.58 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (7-7, 3.91 ERA) vs. Alvin Smith (5-7, 4.13 ERA)

Two right-handers named Smith sandwiching Tom Shumway, the lefty; that was, if Alvin Smith could make it. He was laboring on a hamstring, not the only injury to the Indians’ staff in the last few weeks. They were also without the services of Lowell Genge, who had suffered a hand contusion on Friday and was going to take it day by day, but was not on the DL, and also without infielder Bob Reyes, although they were probably missing Genge’s .282 bat and 13 homers more than Reyes’ powerless .263 act.

Game 1
POR: RF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF Spencer – CF Stevenson – C Delgado – SS Bullock – P Huf
IND: 2B R. Mendez – SS Janes – LF Faulk – RF C. Martinez – 1B M. Rucker – CF D. Morales – C Calhoun – 3B Rolland – P B. Smith

Doubles by Claros and Nunley plated a run in the first for the Critters, with Nunley reaching 50 RBI on the season, which was cute for a team and player that had 111 games on the clock already, and one ribbie behind Shane Walter. Nunley turned a double play in the bottom 1st as well after Huf predictably walked the first Indian up, Rich Mendez, and the Critters pushed out two more runs in the second inning even despite Daniel Bullock being thrown out at home plate on Huf’s 1-out RBI single that came with Stevenson and Bullock in scoring position. Cookie’s double up the rightfield line would score Huf for the second run in the inning. While his pitching made you cringe, Huf came up with another single in the fourth inning, and again Stevenson and Bullock were on board, but this time 90 feet further back, respectively. A.J. Faulk was on the ball quickly and Stevenson was held at third base, bringing up Cookie with one out and three aboard. Cookie was batting a mind-boggling .196 with runners in scoring position and lined the first pitch into Smith’s glove for a staggering and deflating out, followed soon by Raul Claros’ pop to third base that stranded all runners.

By the fifth inning, Huf had three leadoff walks on his ledger, but not only had the Indians not scored, hitting into two double plays along the way, he was also still pitching a no-hitter, technically. In actuality, Matt Huf had a hard time pitching a no-hitter, given that he regularly missed the target so grossly that an entire park full of people would hit their forehead with their palms… Mendez ended the bid with a 2-out single to rightfield, cleanly hit, nothing to complain, in the bottom of the sixth, but Erik Janes’ groundout to Nunley kept him from doing permanent damage as well. By the bottom 7th, the Coons’ 3-0 lead appeared to be overpowered by the Indians having three aboard and nobody out. Faulk had led off with a single to left, and Huf had just walked the bags full after that against Cesar Martinez and Mike Rucker. Danny Morales chopped a ball at Claros for a double play, with Faulk scoring, but Huf haplessly went on to walk Justin Calhoun as well, leading to his removal and my investigation into what kind of furniture could most reasonably be fashioned from his dead skin. Billy Brotman replaced him to face left-handed pinch-hitter Tony Ruiz, who nevertheless hit an RBI single, cutting the lead to 3-2. Since the runners moved up during defensive confusion, the Coons intentionally walked Justin Jackson batting in the #9 hole to get Brotman to face Mendez, who flew to deep right, but Cookie was on top of that ball and ended the inning.

Support came from an unexpected angle in the eighth inning, in which Tony Delgado drew a leadoff walk before Daniel Bullock creamed a Brian Gilbert pitch for his second career home run, restoring the 3-run gap. LOOK AT THAT, SPENCER!! LOOK AT THAT!! … With Lillis having been battered around on Sunday, the Coons would try to patch the last two innings without him, lining up Surginer and Vince D for the job, although the save opportunity came off the board in the ninth thanks to singles by Nunley, Tovias, and Delgado plating the first in the procession. Angry at the missed opportunity, Devereaux would strike out the side in the bottom of the inning. 6-2 Coons. Nunley 2-5, 2B, RBI; Spencer 2-4; Bullock 2-4, BB, HR, 2 RBI;

Huf picked up the W, but walked six batters once more. He has 6.6 walks per nine innings, which is well worse than even last year during his rookie season, when he walked “only” 5.4 batters per nine, while tossing 80+ innings in both seasons. His ERA was also up almost a full run, and his 1.69 WHIP was untenable.

There were still no pitchers in AAA that would be striking alternatives…

Game 2
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – RF Newman – 3B Nunley – CF Stevenson – SS Stalker – C Tovias – P McKendrick
IND: C Calhoun – SS Janes – LF Faulk – RF C. Martinez – 1B M. Rucker – CF D. Morales – 2B Rolland – 3B J. Jackson – P Shumway

In a sign of a team held only together by matching cap insignia, McKendrick and Matt Nunley were in another’s fur as early as the first inning; Nunley first struck out with two aboard to end the top of the first, then misfielded an A.J. Faulk grounder trying to start a double play with Erik Janes coming from first base, much to his own dismay. When Mike Rucker hit a 2-out RBI single later in the inning, the rookie McKendrick quipped his relief that at least the run was unearned, which immediately led to Nunley bursting out from underneath his cap with matching insignia that if he wasn’t playing on the team with the most walks surrendered by its pitchers, he wouldn’t have to turn ****ing two all the time! McKendrick hissed, Nunley clawed at his eyes, and Tim Stalker and Jarod Spencer had considerable trouble keeping the two apart, while the Indians were watching on in bewilderment.

The next internal riot broke out in the third inning and involved the same pair. Spencer and Walter were in scoring position following Walter’s 1-out double up the rightfield line, his 30th two-base effort on the season. Will Newman ran a full count before popping out to short, but Nunley hit a 2-out, 2-run single to flip the score. Returning to the dugout after the inning and a job well done, he immediately let McKendrick know it. Soon enough a camera caught them rolling all over the dugout floor trying to snatch each other’s snack bucket, which included Tony Delgado, an older and wiser man, to carefully step over them on his way to the Gaytirade barrel. Nunley batted again with two on and one out in the fifth inning, but this time walked in a full count, shuffling his bum aboard in addition to Spencer (Jackson’s error) and Newman (intentional walk). Shumway was unhinged at this point, walking Stevenson on straight balls to push a run across, then plated another with a wild pitch that pulled Stalker’s legs out from underneath him, after which he was intentionally walked. Tovias walked, McKendrick struck out, stranding three in a 4-1 game. Stevenson made sure he’d walk between Nunley, who was left on third base, and McKendrick on the way back to the dugout.

McKendrick walked nobody after the first on-field incident and allowed only four hits in total to the Indians across seven innings, holding on to the 4-1 lead until he was hit for by Claros in the eighth inning. The Critters dared fate in the bottom 8th by sending Cory Dew into the 4-1 game along with his 7.15 ERA, with Calhoun immediately lashing a double. Janes also found a gap for an RBI double, leading to Dew’s removal. Kevin Surginer replaced him, but couldn’t keep the runner from scoring on a groundout and a flyout. The Indians even hit two 2-out singles off him via the bats of Mike Rucker and Danny Morales, but Jaylen Rolland struck out to keep them 4-3 behind. The Coons were working on an insurance run against Nick Salinas in the ninth, but Walter was thrown out at home plate on Will Newman’s 2-out double. At least Lillis retired the side in order… 4-3 Critters. Walter 2-4, 2B; Stalker 2-3, BB, 2B; McKendrick 7.0 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 0 ER, 1 BB, 0 K, W (5-6);

Game 3
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Graves – CF Stevenson – C Tovias – SS Stalker – P Gutierrez
IND: LF Faulk – 2B R. Mendez – 1B M. Rucker – CF D. Morales – 3B J. Jackson – C Calhoun – RF Genge – SS Matias – P A. Smith

Top of the first, Cookie walked, stole, and … was left on third base. Gutierrez walked the first batter he faced, with Matt Nunley silently screaming into his glove, but at least the runner Faulk was deleted by Tovias when he tried to take second base. Gutierrez would allow a single to Jackson in the second, but got Calhoun to hit sharply to short for a double play and was still facing the minimum when the Raccoons chalked a run to the board in the fifth inning. Stevenson had hit a leadoff single, had advanced on Elias Tovias’ groundout to Rucker, and then came home on Tim Stalker’s blooper to center that also fell for a single, but the 1-0 lead was soon enough negated by Justin Jackson’s homer in the bottom of the inning. Tovias’ 2-out single in the top 6th scored Shane Walter to break the 1-1 tie, and while the Indians had Faulk and Mendez on the corners after 1-out singles in the bottom 6th, Mike Rucker’s sharp bouncer to Spencer was good enough for two to end the inning. At that point, Gutierrez had six innings with no strikeouts, which put him in line to become the second Raccoons starter in a row to pitch at least six and not whiff anybody, not even the pitcher or an R.J. DeWeese equivalent. He batted for himself to start the top 7th, grounding out, so he still had a chance to either line up some K’s or get whacked into his eighth loss of the season. The former definitely didn’t happen, and the latter would depend on Vince D after Gutierrez walked Morales and conceded a single to Jackson to begin the bottom 7th. Losing Calhoun in a full count meant that Devereaux now pitched with three on and nobody gone. Genge’s sac fly tied the game, but Tony Ruiz hit into an inning-ending double play to Spencer, keeping the teams even at two after seven innings. The Coons were in business in the eighth inning through no fault of their own. Mike Rucker’s error put Graves aboard to begin the inning, and left-hander Mike Homa failed to play Stevenson’s bunt in any sensible way, allowing a leadoff single. Two on, no outs, which turned into nobody on, no outs in a real hurry when Elias Tovias hit an absolute BLAST to leftfield, 3-piece right off the bat, and this game was no longer tied! Cowen and Lillis made sure that the game would also not be tied again in the future, allowing only one runner between them. 5-2 Critters! Walter 2-4, BB; Tovias 2-4, HR, 4 RBI; Stalker 2-4, RBI; Gutierrez 6.0 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 0 K;

Well, this was a most unexpected sweep for either team, I guess.

We would utilize our upcoming off day(s) to skip Matt Huf for a start, which would work seamlessly given that we had both this Thursday and the Monday after the weekend off.

Raccoons (49-65) @ Pacifics (49-66) – August 11-13, 2023

Both teams were last in runs scored in their respective league, with the Pacifics having plated 18 more runs than the Raccoons at this point. Like the Coons, the Pacifics had no power, and overall the pitching was okay-ish for both teams. While the Coons had the second-worst rotation, but the second-best pen in their league, things were a bit more middling throughout for the Pacifics, who had won two of three from the Coons during the last meeting of the teams in 2022.

Projected matchups:
Travis Garrett (3-5, 3.05 ERA) vs. Vincent Alfaro (12-9, 3.34 ERA)
Jesus Chavez (7-11, 4.26 ERA) vs. Ernesto Lozano (7-10, 4.74 ERA)
Chris McKendrick (5-6, 3.08 ERA) vs. Matt McCabe (5-11, 3.52 ERA)

I hope “Tragic” Travis doesn’t consider himself too unlucky, because McCabe’s ERA and record look a whole lot more like active sabotage by his team mates. All three of their starters for this set were right-handed. In their pen they had ex-Coons in Logan Sloan (5.54 ERA as their closer) and Ricky Martinez.

Game 1
POR: RF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF Spencer – C Tovias – CF Stevenson – SS Stalker – P Garrett
LAP: RF Simmons – SS Hansen – CF M. Diaz – C Dehne – 2B Herman – 1B Gilmor – 3B Weber – LF J. Knight – P V. Alfaro

The Raccoons scratched out a 2-spot in the first inning, getting Cookie and Claros on with singles. Walter and Nunley both grounded out, but also both advanced the runners, which gave an RBI to Nunley, and then Spencer hit an RBI single. “Tragic” Travis opened his start with a customary walk, and would concede two singles and two more walks in the inning, including a 2-out, bases-loaded walk to Henry Weber to tie the game right away again. Cookie drew a walk in the third, stole second base, was driven in by Spencer with two outs, and the complete fool Garrett would blow that lead as well as soon as he could. Matt Dehne singled to left, advanced on a wild pitch (…) and was then singled in by Nick Gilmor, tying the game at three through three.

Not all the team’s misery was Garrett’s fault (though most was). When Stevenson and Stalker reached base to begin the fourth inning, Garrett bunted them over neatly, but Cookie’s pop and Claros’ whiff kept the runners stranded in scoring position. The rest of the middle innings was uneventful, even for Garrett, who struck out eight in 6.1 innings, but departed after issuing a fifth walk in the game, that one to speedy Justin Simmons, who had 20 stolen bases on the season. Kevin Surginer replaced Garrett at this point, and if you were willing to ignore the wild pitch he threw, Kevin did a good job of keeping the Pacifics away, striking out John Hansen and getting Mario Diaz to ground out to short, with the 3-3 tie persisting. Alfaro went eighth innings and whiffed as many for L.A. without winning a decision, either, and Logan Sloan struck out Stalker and Newman and got Cookie to ground out in the ninth. David Kipple was in the game in the bottom 9th. Henry Weber hit a first-pitch single before getting forced on a poor bunt by Michael Lefebure. The left-handed batter in the #9 hole would not bunt – he whacked a 400-footer to right center to end the game instead. 5-3 Pacifics. Claros 2-4; Spencer 2-4, 2 RBI; Surginer 1.1 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 3 K;

This loss sent the Coons to 49-66, nothing special, really. The Loggers and Titans were tied atop the division, 18 games ahead. The real spectacle was going on in Vancouver, with the Elks losing their 80th on that day, against only 35 wins.

It could still be so much worse.

Game 2
POR: RF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF Spencer – C Tovias – CF Stevenson – SS Stalker – P Chavez
LAP: RF Simmons – SS Hansen – CF M. Diaz – C Dehne – 2B Herman – 1B Gilmor – 3B Weber – LF Cesta– P Lozano

Lozano retired nobody, period. After walking Cookie to start the game, he waved for the trainer and vanished with him in the tunnel after a very brief conversation, leaving the Pacifics no option but to call a bullpen day. At least Rob Owensby got the team out of the inning without conceding the run, so Lozano would not take a bitter loss on top of suffering injury. Nope, it would be Chavez to concede the first run, walking former Titan Mike Cesta in the bottom 3rd and conceding the run on Simmons’ single to right after Owensby had bunted the runner to second base, putting himself in the lead after three scoreless innings of relief. Owensby would last four-plus, being removed after walking Stevenson to begin the fifth inning. Replacement Jesus Lopez immediately allowed a double to Tim Stalker, putting men in scoring position with nobody out. Chavez struck out, Cookie grounded back to the mound, and Raul Claros grounded to short. Only John Hansen’s slow play behind the second base bag allowed Claros to leg out that grounder, being called safe at first base, with Stevenson scoring to tie the score. Walter grounded out to Nick Herman to end the inning after that. Oh well, at least the Pacifics also stranded their runners in the bottom 5th, reaching the corners with one out. Jose Varela and Justin Simmons both struck out instead of driving in the go-ahead run. Injury would also claim the Pacifics’ John Hansen by the sixth inning, although insult remained with the Raccoons, who couldn’t peel more than six hits and a single ****ty run from the Pacifics’ overburdened bullpen across nine innings, and thus also failed to claim a lead in regulation. Of course there were always ways to make your lot even worse than you deserved. Chavez pitched eight innings of 1-run ball, with Vince D taking over business in the bottom 9th. He struck out Matt Dehne, and Nick Herman grounded out. Nick Gilmor, however, wouldn’t, sending a bouncer up the rightfield line and past Cookie for a 2-out triple. Before Henry Weber got a chance to fail, Devereaux would do so, ending the game with a wild pitch past a befuddled Elias Tovias… 2-1 Pacifics. Claros 2-4, RBI; Chavez 8.0 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 3 BB, 4 K;

Game 3
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Newman – C Delgado – SS Bullock – CF Santos – P McKendrick
LAP: RF Simmons – SS Hansen – CF M. Diaz – C Dehne – 2B Herman – 1B Gilmor – 3B Weber – LF J. Knight – P McCabe

The Pacifics made errors in both of the first two innings, but only the second one cost them dearly. The Raccoons had Bullock on second after walking, and Frank Santos at first after knocking a single up the middle (bravely chasing the .200 mark!) when McKendrick bunted. Weber, who had been a Gold Glover in 2018, unleashed a horrendous throw well over Nick Gilmor and into the stands that plated Bullock with the first run of the game and placed runners in scoring position. One of those runners, Santos, scored on a wild pitch, and McKendrick would come home on Spencer’s 2-out single after Cookie struck out. The Critters took a 3-0 lead, all runs unearned, but soon enough the Coons would rekindle the ugly flame still flickering from Tuesday night.

Nunley hit a leadoff double in the top of the third inning, and while Newman drew a walk, Delgado hit into a double play and Bullock was no help either, stranding Nunley on third base overall. In the bottom of the inning, McCabe knocked a clean single over the infielders into left to begin the frame, and on the first pitch, too. Simmons singled to right, putting runners on the corners, and when John Hansen rolled a ball between the mound and third base line, Nunley hustled in and made a bare-handed play at first base to kill Hansen, whose barking back was subdued with painkillers, but was surely slowing him down a wee bit. McCabe scored, much to McKendrick’s visible dismay, which irked Nunley again and he was right in the rookie’s face again, hissing at him that he should do his ****ing job and maybe strike out the opposing pitcher when he saw him – McKendrick had not gotten a strikeout in the Tuesday game, and he had none in this game so far, either. Shane Walter separated the two hagglers, leading to the next play on which Diaz reached on an infield single on a roller even slower than the previous one. Nunley had no chance playing that, but McKendrick still insisted he should hustle more. McKendrick himself had not made a move for the ball. Nunley glared at him, before knocking McKendrick’s hat off his head and calling him a skunk. This time, Delgado had to hold back McKendrick before it got really ugly. The pitching coach also got involved at this point, insisting that McKendrick stop fudging around here, but that advice was not heeded, either. The next three batters all reached base, with Dehne’s RBI single, a walk to Herman, and another RBI single by Gilmor. The last one tied the game. Weber struck out and Joe Knight lined out to Bullock to strand a full set of runners in a 3-3 game. The Pacifics claimed the lead the following inning on Mario Diaz’ 2-piece to left, and Weber’s double and Knight’s single scored another run off him in the fifth. The Knight single knocked him out of the game, with Cory Dew ending the fifth on the mound.

The sixth saw solo homers by both catchers to run the score from 6-3 to 7-4, with Dew surrendering Dehne’s dinger, but the Pacifics would wait to the seventh and Adam Cowen to completely tear a pitcher in half. Cowen got an out to start the inning against Weber, then retired absolutely nobody anymore. Three hits and two walks plated four additional runs for the Pacifics, with Hansen and Diaz plating two apiece with singles. Confused throws by the Raccoons also gave both of them extra bases they didn’t deserve. The Coons, battered and murdered in an 11-4 game, scored a run in the eighth off Jesus Pamatz when Santos, Stalker, and Cookie all reached with two outs, moving the score back to 11-5, which was, you know, cute; also, the final tally. 11-5 Pacifics. Santos 2-4;

In other news

August 7 – Blue Sox and Cyclones combine for no fewer than four half-innings of 4+ runs in a 13-11 whirlwind game that falls the Sox’ way eventually.
August 9 – BOS OF Adam Braun (.285, 4 HR, 57 RBI) hurt his shoulder on a throw and will miss up to six weeks with a shoulder strain.
August 12 – Boston SP Julio San Pedro (13-7, 3.21 ERA) sparkles in a 3-hit shutout over the Stars. The Titans win 7-0.
August 12 – TOP SP Carlos Marron (10-9, 3.36 ERA) will miss the rest of the season with an ankle injury.
August 13 – BOS SP Chris Klein (10-11, 2.91 ERA) and CL Ron Thrasher (3-4, 4.37 ERA, 27 SV) pitch a combined no-hitter in a 2-1 win over the Stars, who score an unearned run in the first inning thanks to a Matt Owen error that puts DAL SS Manny Ferrer (.265, 5 HR, 49 RBI) on second base with nobody out. This marks the second consecutive year that the Titans spin a combined no-hitter.

Complaints and stuff

The story that circulated in Twatbook and other social trivia this week that one Raccoon took a dump in a rookie teammate’s locker is absolutely not true, at all! … The feces weren’t even human – … or a raccoon’s, for that matter.

But I don’t think we’ve had a pitcher and a third baseman this crossed up and envious of the other’s stripes since Nick Brown and Ricardo Martinez, with roles reversed back then between the pitcher and third baseman.

ABL CAREER STOLEN BASE LEADERS
1st – Moromao Hino – 485
2nd – Diego Rodriguez – 460 – HOF
3rd – Martin Ortíz – 457
4th – Cristo Ramirez – 424 – HOF
5th – Daniel Silva – 417
6th – Danny Flores – 411 – active
7th – Pablo Sanchez – 398 – active
8th – Javier Rodriguez – 391
9th – Ricardo Carmona – 380 – active
10th – Piet Oosterom – 368 – active

I would not hold my breath on Cookie eventually reaching the Hall of Fame, by the way. He’s almost 32, he’s still not at 2,000 career hits (1,924 to be precise), and right now he plays like his body is ready to vomit out his soul just to be done with it all.

Also, we all know that WAR is a useless stat, but Cookie’s got 40.7 right now, including utter zero this year.

Finally, it can’t hurt to warm this up again: all of Cookie’s base hits have come with the Raccoons, and no player has ever landed 2,000 base hits as a Raccoon.

PORTLAND RACCOONS FRANCHISE HIT LEADERS
1st – Neil Reece – 1,983 – HOF
2nd – Ricardo Carmona – 1,924 – active
3rd – Daniel Hall – 1,886
4th – Ieyoshi Nomura – 1,581 – active
5th – Tetsu Osanai – 1,548 – HOF
6th – Matt Nunley – 1,490 – active
7th – Adrian Quebell – 1,400
8th – Mark Dawson – 1,313
9th – Daniel Sharp – 1,267
10th – Conceicao Guerin – 1,185

Would you have guessed that even a player as shady as Daniel Bullock is already in the franchise top 100? He is tied for 99th to be precise, with 169 base hits, knotted with Ramiro Cavazos, who played only one year in the brown shirt, in 2001, which brings us to…

Fun Fact: The Raccoons managed to play seven games and lose them all in the week ending August 10, 2003. Five of the losses were incurred by one run, including three 1-0 and 2-1 losses. The Raccoons amounted to 50 base hits in the seven games.

They also dropped into last place during that week, although they would finish a lofty fourth at the end of the year. Not quite sure how this team is supposed to reach fourth place. Maybe if the Indians fold?

The highlight reel from that week 20 years ago includes Marcos Bruno allowing not one, but two 3-run home runs in a single appearance, a 9-5 loss to the Falcons. That was on Tuesday. Saturday, Daniel Sharp and Jesus Palacios began the game with singles before Sharpie was caught in a rundown and Chris Beairsto (yuck!!) hit into a double play. Randy Farley sucked up his 1-0 loss early in the bottom 1st by allowing singles to Phil Montray, Mike Jones, then balking Montray to third and conceding the run on a Jesus Paraz sac fly. On Sunday, Bob Joly suffered the 2-1 loss to the Indians in the 12th inning; as we were out of other pitchers or even personnel (not seeing how Joly ever qualified as ‘pitcher’), we were forced to leave him in the game until he walked enough batters for the bags to spill over.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (49-68) vs. Miners (51-67) – August 15-17, 2023

Here were two teams over 20 games out in August that were just hoping to not get hurt a whole lot more in the last 40-some games. The Miners were second from the bottom in offense in the Federal League, and their pitching was barely better than the bottom three, which of course was not a winning mix to begin with. Their run differential was -100, even worse than the Critters’ (-80). The Miners had not won a series from the Raccoons in 11 years, most recently losing two out of three in ’22.

Projected matchups:
Rico Gutierrez (7-7, 3.87 ERA) vs. George Marsh (2-1, 4.15 ERA)
Travis Garrett (3-5, 3.14 ERA) vs. Josh Knupp (8-10, 4.32 ERA)
Jesus Chavez (7-11, 4.09 ERA) vs. Joao Joo (6-10, 3.93 ERA)

Left-right-left for this series. Amazingly, the Miners were terrible without a single former Raccoon in their duty. Plenty of Elks, though…

Game 1
PIT: CF J. Lopez – 1B Keen – LF B. Adams – C Henley – RF Bramlett – SS Becker – 3B Bahner – 2B Rinehart – P Marsh
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – RF Newman – 3B Nunley – CF Stevenson – SS Stalker – C Tovias – P Gutierrez

Elias Tovias was the only Critter to reach base the first time through the order, hitting a single to left center and getting stranded. Gutierrez was more on the edge than Marsh, although it was not always his fault. In the second inning, Tim Stalker airmailed a throw on Jeff Becker’s grounder for a 2-base error to start the inning, but the Miners failed to cash in the unearned run after Travis Bahner grounded out to Walter, Jeff Rinehart whiffed, and George Marsh flew out easily. Marsh hit a single in the fifth inning, but was also stranded, and the Coons only got another Tovias single before the end of five. That one came with two outs in the bottom 5th and moved Stalker to second base; Tim had been drilled by a Marsh pitch. Gutierrez struck out though, keeping the game scoreless through five. That changed in the top of the sixth inning with Bill Adams’ leadoff jack to center, his 20th dinger on the year, and that was not even the team lead, which was held by J.J. Henley with 21. One inning later, Bahner drew a 4-pitch walk to begin the inning, and PH Jon Pendergrass singled hard to left. Bahner was run for by Leo Otero once he reached second base, but at least we could claw an out from Marsh, who … singled to right. Bases loaded, nobody out, and Gutierrez was totally sure he could get left-handed batter Jorge Lopez out. Lopez hit a mighty deep sac fly to center, putting the Miners 2-0 ahead, Gutierrez threw a wild pitch, then served up an RBI single to Josh Keen. Next thing everybody knew Kevin Surginer was spewn forth from the bullpen gate, with Adams hitting a sac fly off him to extend their lead to 4-0. By the ninth, three base hits would plate another run charged to Adam Cowen – ultimately all window dressing. The Raccoons never as much as scared George Marsh, who finished a 3-hit shutout on just 95 pitches. 5-0 Miners. Tovias 2-3;

That left-handed thing seemed to work for the Miners. They found another left-hander to nag the Raccoons on Wednesday in swingman Joe Jones (7-10, 4.55 ERA).

Game 2
PIT: CF J. Lopez – SS Becker – LF B. Adams – C Henley – 1B Keen – 2B Rinehart – RF Feldmann – 3B Bahner – P J. Jones
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – RF Newman – 3B Nunley – CF Stevenson – SS Stalker – C Delgado – P Garrett

Spencer singled in the first. Walter hit into a double play in the first. Nobody scored in the first. People scored in the second, but that was mostly “Tragic” Travis being on a roll… down a steep embankment, with his tail on fire. Garrett offered a 4-pitch leadoff walk to J.J. Henley which was OH SO AMAZING, then knocked Josh Keen, at which point you could either make it hard on yourself or simply accept having another 5-game losing streak. Rinehart struck out in Elk fashion, but Ryan Feldmann singled to load them up. Travis Bahner grounded back to the mound, with Garrett throwing home for the second out, and then he just had to face the opposing pitcher and get out of – WHY THE ****, Joe Jones hit a single to left center, two 2-out runs scored, and that was that.

On to the fourth, in which “Tragic” Travis employed proven success strategies again and issued another 4-pitch leadoff walk to Henley. This time Rinehart hit a single, Feldmann scored a run with a groundout to the left side, and at that point you had a 3-0 score, Jeff Rinehart on second base and two outs, but with Garrett you can’t even pull up the pitcher with an intentional walk to Bahner. Don’t put extra runs on base! Travis Bahner was thus pitched to, much to his delight, and peppered a 410-footer to right center to race the score to 5-0. And as if I needed prove of there being no joy in life, ever, Garrett then walked the opposing pitcher with two outs… Another walk to Jorge Lopez was the end of Garrett’s outing, but when Cory Dew replaced him he had nothing better to do than to walk Jeff Becker, too. That’s three 2-out walks and the middle of the order coming up! Just before Bill Adams fell just little short of a slam and flew out to Will Newman instead, cameras caught two teenage boys of about 19 and 17 years in the stands who were both wearing matching 2019 Raccoons CL North Champs shirts and classic brown caps and, as they were witnessing the ongoing brutal dissolution of the powerhouse team that they watched compete for trophies as a kid, were both holding on to each other and were dissolved in bitter tears of despair. And so was I.

One of the few vestiges of that dynasty that never was, and that still had his legs under him part-time, finally got the Critters on the board in the fifth. It was mostly an academical motion, but Cookie’s 2-out RBI single to right spelled out that the Coons sucked, but were not going to go down without some noise … besides Matt Nunley operating a popcorn pan in the dugout. Delgado scored on the play, but the inning ended with Spencer grounding out to his opposite keystone guard, Rinehart, keeping the Critters 5-1 behind. They would not get closer than that again… Adam Cowen featured in both the seventh and eighth innings, allowed a run in both of them, including a Feldmann homer. Bottom 8th, Cookie walked, stole second, and was left out there to die. Joe Jones fell one out short of a complete game when Stevenson knocked a single to center on his 110th pitch which the Miners deemed enough. Jayden Reed got Zach Graves to fly out to left to end the game and win the Miners’ their first set over the Coons in more than a decade. 7-1 Miners. Santos (PH) 1-1;

43 more games? Really? It feels like the season has been going on for about as many months!!

There would not be a game on Thursday – rain wiped out our third loss to the Miners before it could occur. Or maybe it was tears. Who knows these things?

Raccoons (49-70) vs. Titans (71-51) – August 18-20, 2023

Up 8-4 against the Coons in ’23, the Titans came into town in second place after a recent losing streak. They were still fourth in runs scored and second in runs allowed in the CL, and we were probably going to take a beating, although one factor in them going 7-8 in August was a rough month in terms of injuries. The Titans were without Alan Farrell, Jamie Wilson, Bill Hebberd, Adrian Reichardt, Adam Braun, and others.

Projected matchups:
Jesus Chavez (7-11, 4.09 ERA) vs. Julio San Pedro (13-7, 3.21 ERA)
Chris McKendrick (5-7, 3.61 ERA) vs. Chris Klein (10-11, 2.91 ERA)
Matt Huf (2-8, 5.13 ERA) vs. Dustin Wingo (1-3, 4.82 ERA)

Unless the Titans would skip the rookie Wingo, he would be the third left-handed opponent for us this week following both Miners starters that actually took the mound.

Game 1
BOS: RF W. Ramos – C Leonard – 1B Herlihy – 2B Kane – 3B R. West – SS Stephens – LF Cornejo – CF Baptiste – P San Pedro
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Claros – RF Graves – 3B Nunley – CF Stevenson – C Tovias – SS Bullock – 1B Santos – P Chavez

The early innings were scoreless, with the Titans getting runners to the corners in the first inning thanks to a leadoff single by Willie Ramos and then Santos’ 2-out error at first base. Rhett West then grounded out, but would belt a ball 375 feet to left in the fourth inning for the game’s maiden run, a solo homer, and only his second long ball in almost 200 at-bats this season. Ramos hit another leadoff single in the fifth inning, stole a base, and this time was brought in to score, extending the Titans’ lead to 2-0. The clump of nothing that was the home team, according to the scoreboard, had three hits by the middle innings, but I’d be damned if I could remember a single one of them, and they sure as hell hadn’t scored any runs.

Chavez lasted 6.1 innings before drilling Keith Leonard for an exit ticket. Kipple retired Trent Herlihy and Mike Kane with strikeouts to get out of that situation. Cory Dew was on the mound in the eighth and he was just a real mess at this point: leadoff walk to West, and then he mishandled Jonathan Stephens’ bunt for an error. Gil Cornejo bunted without interference to move the runners over, but Tristen Baptiste – a player too bad to have even a place on OUR team – struck out and Jose Duran grounded out to keep the runners stranded on second and third. Top 9th, Surginer was in the game and Matt Nunley threw away Ramos’ grounder to put the leadoff man on second base. Alex Arias grounded out, moving the runner to third base, from where Surginer plate him with a wild pitch. Thank heavens for ****ty pitching on the Coons, otherwise I would not have anything to waffle on about! 3-0 Titans. Stevenson 2-3; Santos 1-2, BB; Chavez 6.1 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 1 BB, 6 K, L (7-12);

It’s an odd sample size, but, eh, it’s Friday night, and … and we’ve scored one run this entire week. Damn you, Cookie! Without your RBI on Wednesday we’d be a better punchline! It was even earned!

Game 2
BOS: RF W. Ramos – C Leonard – 1B Herlihy – LF M. Owen – 2B Kane – 3B R. West – SS Stephens – CF Baptiste – P Klein
POR: LF Carmona – 3B Claros – 1B Walter – RF Graves – 2B Spencer – CF Stevenson – SS Stalker – C Tovias – P McKendrick

Nunley had the day off with his new bestest friend pitching (no direct correlation, I swear) and had clear instructions to either shout encouragement from the other side of the railing or just focus on the popcorn pan and the vertical doner kebab rotisserie that he had by now also dragged into the dugout for healthy snacks between innings. Maybe an instructor for a healthy lifestyle was what this team needed?

The Critters had actual scoring opportunities in the early innings, with Jarod Spencer hitting a leadoff double in the second inning, and Cookie and Claros both walking in the third. Nevertheless, none of these were driven in. McKendrick allowed his share of runners, but was not overly awful in the early going, although Raul Claros’ defense at the hot corner was creaky and he was charged with an error in the first inning, and didn’t get to a grounder by Mike Kane in the fourth that everybody in attendance knew Matt Nunley would have gotten to. Kane had a single, but was also left stranded. This roster’s rotten stench returned by the fifth inning, though, in which the Titans went to the top of the order with two outs and nobody on. Three batters later there two outs and three men on, with Ramos walking, Shane Walter’s error putting on Leonard, and then another walk being drawn by Trent Herlihy. Matt Owen ran a full count before knocking the ball in play, grounding out to Stalker and keeping the scoreboard virgin.

Bottom 5th, Tim Stalker led off with a single, then was caught stealing. This would come back to bite the team, since Tovias singled afterwards, and Cookie also reached base with a 2-out single. They would have scored a run somewhere along the way if Stalker had stuck on base, but Claros’ groundout to second base denied them, again. McKendrick was done after six shutout innings, needing over 100 pitches for the effort, but at least him and Nunley were able to gobble up the various foodstuffs in the dugout together without fighting afterwards, and Zach Graves hit a 1-out double in the bottom 6th to present a threat. Spencer grounded out unhelpfully, but Stevenson singled to left center. Not giving a damn about Owen’s arm, Graves made for home and was easily save, the second Coons run of the week! Tim Stalker doubled the output three pitches later with a 2-piece to left center, running the tally to 3-0, to which they added another run in the seventh on Shane Walter’s sac fly that brought home Nunley, who had opened the inning with a pinch-hit single. The Titans were far from defeated though, especially with Tovias’ special invitation in the eighth inning, dropping Surginer’s strike three to Rhett West to give the Titans a free runner on first base anyway. Baptiste would hit a deep fly with two outs, but Stevenson made the catch before things could get out of paw.

Amazingly, the Titans would make a move in the ninth inning despite sending up left-handed batters against Brett Lillis, who was in a 4-0 game because he had not gotten a lot of work in the recent and active 6-game losing streak. Gil Cornejo made an out to begin the inning, but then Ramos doubled to left. Leonard grounded to third base, where Claros made his second error of the game with a terrible throw past Walter, allowing Ramos to score, 4-1. Herlihy walked, and Owen singled off Lillis, loading the bases with the tying runs and only one out on the board. Mike Kane grounded back to the mound for an out at home, after which Lillis ran a full count to Rhett West, who would swing over ball four to end the game. 4-1 Blighters. Stalker 2-4, HR, 2 RBI; Nunley (PH) 1-1; McKendrick 6.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 4 BB, 3 K, W (6-7);

What? We won?

Game 3
BOS: RF W. Ramos – C Leonard – 1B Herlihy – LF M. Owen – 2B Kane – 3B R. West – SS Stephens – CF Baptiste – P Wingo
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – RF Newman – 3B Nunley – CF Stevenson – SS Stalker – C Delgado – P Huf

Cookie walked, Spencer and Walter singled, three on, no outs in the bottom 1st, aaand… nobody scored. Wingo whiffed Will, then Nunley, and Stevenson flew out to left. While there were also positives, like Huf not walking everybody in plain sight… at least not initially. The Titans got only one walk and no hits the first time through the order, but Huf spilled a leadoff walk to Herlihy in the fourth inning. Matt Owen grounded out, but Kane reached on Walter’s error, and Rhett West singled through between Stalker and Spencer to score the first run of the game, Herlihy. They would be held to that one run. Cookie came in well and caught Jonathan Stephens’ shallow fly, and Baptiste went down swinging to end the inning.

The Critters, struggling to make up one run, would soon enough have to make up three thanks to Huf walking Leonard with two outs in the fifth and then getting utterly bombed by Trent Herlihy with his 18th homer of the season. Huf would not be around for much longer after that, but the Coons twitched in the bottom of the inning. Newman drew a 2-out walk, Nunley singled past Herlihy, and then Stevenson sent a fly into the rightfield corner. Newman scored, Nunley was sent, but thrown out, ending the inning still down 3-1. While patching innings with the pen, the Coons would scratch out another run in the bottom 7th, which saw Cookie single, move up on Spencer’s groundout that erased a stolen base attempt, and then scored on Walter’s single, 3-2. Between Newman and Nunley, Coons would hit the ball a combined negative 11 feet, keeping Walter and the tying run on first base. Enter Raul Claros, who batted or Cory Dew to begin the bottom 8th and rammed a ball past Willie Ramos for a leadoff double. C’MON BOYS!! ****ING KILL THEM NOW!! Tim Stalker grounded out to short, keeping the runner pinned, and that was the end for Wingo, who was replaced by right-hander Javy Salomon, who threw two pitches to Tony Delgado to line up for the loss when Delgado belched a bomb over the fence to flip the score! TWO-RUN HOME RUN, HERE WE COME!! Thank goodness, Brett Lillis had pitched so long and pointlessly the previous day …! Nah, Brett’s good – Cornejo, Chris Almanza, and Arias struck out in order. 4-3 Critters! Walter 3-4, RBI; Stevenson 1-2, BB, 2B, RBI; Claros (PH) 1-1, 2B; Delgado 1-3, HR, 2 RBI;

In other news

August 15 – WAS SS Tom McWhorter (.268, 14 HR, 56 RBI) shoots his 300th career home run, a 2-run home run off Boston’s SP Alberto Molina (11-10, 3.42 ERA) that helps the Capitals win 5-2.
August 15 – The Scorpions will be without C Jaiden “Banshee” Jackson (.273, 15 HR, 72 RBI) for three weeks. The 24-year-old has sustained a strained hamstring.
August 18 – Three different Aces have 4-hit games in a 12-1 drubbing of the Knights. Adam Young (.274, 10 HR, 55 RBI) has two home runs amongst his four hits.
August 20 – IND SP Manny Ortega (5-11, 4.29 ERA) is diagnosed with bone chips in his elbow, ending his season.

Complaints and stuff

While parked under a tree on the roadside on my way home during this week and listening to the radio as the late-evening summer rain splashed down on my windshield, the last station in Portland that still plays good old, honest rock for folks like me living in yesteryear let go of a song I hadn’t heard in decades and wouldn’t have remembered anymore if dared to do so. “We’ve got to run/ while our hearts are filled with desire/ run/ like the streets are on fire/ oh-oh-oh/ we’ve got to run …!”* I unbuckled, left the car and stood outside in the rain for a while until the screaming guitars inside the car subsided, then started to run down the road as fast as I could, as long as I could. Then I trudged back to the car, with stinging pain in the side and soaking wet. You stupid fool! Where are you even going to run to? Desire here, heart there. You have nowhere to go to anymore, but down with this team.

Oh well, maybe I managed to catch pneumonia. Always stay positive. I *do* feel icky.

Thursday’s postponement has been rescheduled for Thursday right next week, wiping out our off day there and creating a stint of 13 straight games starting with the Titans series.

The crying teen boys from Wednesday’s disaster did not elude the Agitator, either, who ran them on the front page on Thursday under the title “COONS MAKE KIDS CRY”. Which I guess is one way to become (in)famous. Over the weekend, Maud’s crew got hold of the two brothers, who are named Ralph and Randy after a pair of mildly successful Raccoons pitchers during those early 2000s we talk about so much in this part and invited them and their family to take in a game during the upcoming Thunder series from a suite.

We are yet waiting for them to call back… it’s that bad. The Coons don’t even make good charity anymore. Maybe we should get them bowling coupons or some other **** that takes place on the other side of town?

Fun Fact: At this time in August 1997, David Brewer bluntly stated to BNN that he couldn’t wait but to get out of Portland, which was the final nail in the funeral of the 1989-1996 dynasty (as if last place, the O-Mo trade, and the 47-71 record hadn’t been hints enough).

Brewer had signed a 6-yr, $9M contract prior to the 1995 season, at that point the richest ever doled out by the Raccoons, and also one of the richest in league history. That the 1997 Raccoons shed 40 wins and dryly descended into the Decade of Darkness was not Brewer’s fault. He batted a steady .323/.412/.441 and scored 96 runs, which was as much as we would dare to ask him. In his three years in Portland, Brewer always made the All Star team (his last All Star nods despite him leaving at age 29) and won a batting title along with the Player of the Year trophy in ’95. Always injury-prone, his body was eaten up at a rapid pace as soon as he ventured onto the wrong side of 30, and while he had collected 6+ WAR *despite* injuries for seven straight years from ’91 through ’97, he would never come close to that mark again.

He entered the Hall of Fame as an Elk in 2011, having spent the first seven years of his career with them. Overall he batted .325 with 86 homers and 955 RBI, and also stole 162 bases. He piled up 2,529 base hits and walked almost 1,000 times. His lone World Series ring came with the Titans in 2004, a year in which he barely started more games than his age (36).

And what did the Coons trade him for? To the Condors for Randy Farley, Clyde Brady, and Chris Parker. So there’s half of the crying boys’ above, the Avatar of Losing, and player on a power position that outran a .700 OPS just six times in his career, and only three times in a qualifying season, but still managed to play for 16 years in the Bigs.

*Benny Mardones – We’ve Got To Run, which I stumbled across on Youtube actually this week and which I can’t stop listening to, especially while being tortured by the Furballs.

[Westheim]

(a still from Jarod Spencer crossing first base after a walkoff single over the Aces all the way back in April flashes across the screen, accompanied by the Raccoons’ logo)

“The Portland Raccoons are brought to you by … California Waves – lard-filled pastries with no nutritional value; … Jamestown Brewery – the refreshing taste of old beer; … and Joe’s Hoes – Portland’s #1 address for gardening supplies and tools!”

Raccoons (51-71) @ Crusaders (71-53) – August 21-23, 2023

Inside the final 40 games, finally, the Raccoons made their way to New York to face the Crusaders on a brief 3-day road stint. The Crusaders had a commanding 9-3 lead in the season series and had to keep winning to remain in the three-way battle for the division lead. They had allowed the fewest runs in the Continental League, but still weren’t scoring well, barely making it to the league average in runs plated.

Projected matchups:
Rico Gutierrez (7-8, 3.95 ERA) vs. Tim Dunn (9-8, 3.63 ERA)
Travis Garrett (3-6, 3.51 ERA) vs. Ben Jacobson (5-5, 3.22 ERA)
Jesus Chavez (7-12, 4.03 ERA) vs. Ed Hague (5-2, 3.32 ERA)

This seris would start with two southpaws opposite the Critters, followed by the right-hander Hague. Ben “Nails” Jacobson was the rare case of a 32-year-old near-rookie that did not completely make a fool of himself. Entering the season with fewer than one year of service time (though having exceeded rookie limits), not having made a major league start, and not having appeared in relief since 2020, Jacobson had somehow put together almost as much WAR as “Tragic” Travis, Chris McKendrick, and Matt Huf combined.

Game 1
POR: 2B Claros – LF Spencer – CF Stevenson – RF Newman – 3B Nunley – C Delgado – SS Stalker – 1B Santos – P Gutierrez
NYC: 1B X. Garcia – 2B I. Flores – 3B Schmit – LF Loya – CF Douglas – C Rangel – RF J. Williams – SS R. Soto – P Dunn

Perpetually red-faced Tim Dunn did not retire any of the first four Coons that came to the plate in the game, which would cost him two runs on Raul Claros’ infield single, Spencer’s RBI triple to center, Stevenson’s walk, and Will Newman’s RBI single up the middle before the inning fizzled out, though in that regard he was not in the only pitcher in the game that came, was seen, and conquered; Xavier Garcia ripped a leadoff jack off Gutierrez in the bottom 1st, and base hits by Ivan Flores and Lance Douglas tied the game right in the first inning. The Crusaders kept melting, though, with Dunn walking Frank Santos in the second inning. Gutierrez bunted the runner over, and Claros and Spencer both hit singles, Claros’ putting the Coons 3-2 ahead. Stevenson lined at Ivan Flores, who reached for the ball but had it dink off his wrist for a painful error that also scored a run, and Newman rolled a ball across the infield that nobody found it in his heart to make a play on, leaving the sluggish Newman with an RBI infield single, 5-2. The inning ended with Nunley, and for a nice change Gutierrez held on to the lead for more than three seconds, but Matt Nunley would partake in the ongoing deconstruction of Tim Dunn later on, hitting an RBI single in the fifth inning that chased home Josh Stevenson and ran the score to 6-2. Six runs, four earned, would be the final tally on Dunn, who was batted for in the bottom of the inning. Kyle Mims drew a 2-out walk in his place, Garcia singled, but Ivan Flores grounded out to Claros, who faced Adonis Foster in the top of the sixth and hit a single to right, his fourth single in the game in as many attempts. Behind him, Jarod Spencer hit in his second double play in his last two appearances…

Not all things being sugar was also true for Gutierrez, who allowed some really hard fly balls, but the Crusaders wouldn’t hit another ball out of the park off him past the Garcia bomb in the first inning, despite f.e. in the fourth inning making nothing but deep fly outs. Gutierrez perhaps took advantage of a mostly left-handed lineup and after the early 2-spot on him pitched seven shutout innings for eight frames of 5-hit ball. But even with a 6-2 lead on the board we still had to fool around. Cory Dew entered the ninth inning with the hopes for a quick one, which he immediately dashed. Walks to Andy Schmit and Ricky Loya and no outs recorded got him evicted from the event, with Brett Lillis coming on to record strikeouts against Lance Douglas and Harvey Rangel before Jake Williams grounded out to first base. 6-2 Coons. Claros 4-4, BB, RBI; Spencer 2-4, 3B, RBI; Tovias (PH) 1-1; Newman 3-5, 2 RBI; Gutierrez 8.0 IP, 5 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 1 BB, 6 K, W (8-8);

Completely out of whack, with as many walks as strikeouts and with an ERA that refused to leave the vicinity of seven, the Raccoons heavy-heartedly sent Cory Dew packing after this game, hoping he could figure **** out in AAA. Will West was called up rather than Joe Moore, who had been sent down to figure **** out more than a month ago and still hadn’t…

Game 2
POR: LF Carmona – 3B Claros – CF Stevenson – 1B Walter – RF Newman – 2B Spencer – SS Bullock – C Tovias – P Garrett
NYC: CF Douglas – 2B I. Flores – RF Fullerton – LF J. Williams – 3B Schmit – SS Loya – 1B Perkins – C McPherson – P Jacobson

For the second consecutive game, Jarod Spencer hit a run-scoring triple in his first time at-bat, this time driving in both Shane Walter and Will Newman in the second inning, the first counters in the contest. Sadly, between Bullock (K), Tovias (U3), and Garrett (K), the Raccoons did not find it in their hearts to plate him from third base with nobody out. The Coons also wasted a Claros double in the third inning, but we don’t want to whine too much about these things, because the Crusaders shoveled runners to third base in more innings than not against Garrett and never managed to get them across home plate in the early innings. The top 4th saw the Coons’ lead increase to 3-0 in unearned fashion, Newman singling, Spencer reaching on an error, and Bullock’s grounder to Ivan Flores allowing Newman to score from third base.

By the bottom 4th, “Tragic” Travis finally cucked out, stringing up 1-out walks to D.J. Fullerton and Jake Williams, allowing a blooper for an RBI single to Schmit, and then walking Ricky Loya, because remembering the location of the strike zone was really that hard. Raul Claros made a Nunley-esque play on the hot corner on Eric McPherson’s quick bouncer and started a double play to end the inning before it could get really ugly, and this was a statement made assuming everybody’s understanding of a certain baseline ugliness in Raccoons baseball in 2023. The Crusaders kept finding double plays, and the Raccoons failed in other assorted ways, f.e. putting Cookie and Claros on the corners in the top 7th and stranding them with consecutive pops by Stevenson and Walter. Through seven, they had 11 hits and had scored only three runs, formally begging the Crusaders for a comeback. Ricky Loya reluctantly obliged, homering off Garrett to begin the bottom 7th. With the gap down to 3-2, Garrett’s stay was over, and Billy Brotman would retired Josh Perkins, McPherson, and Mims in order, with two strikeouts, but completely lost his **** in the following inning, issuing 4-pitch walks to two left-handed batters in Robby Soto and D.J. Fullerton. Kipple replaced him, allowed a game-tying single to Williams, then threw a wild pitch. Schmit somehow struck out, after which Kevin Surginer came on to whiff Loya to get out of the damn inning.

Doubles by Newman in the ninth and Stalker in the tenth innings went unconverted into something nice, but the Raccoons still had a hard time complaining, given Lance Douglas’ leadoff triple off Surginer in the bottom 10th. Surginer got Soto to pop out before Fullerton grounded to second base. This was for the game! Spencer came hustling in and made a third baseman’s move in picking the ball bare-handed, on the run, and flinging it to home plate in one seamless motion, and Douglas was OUT!! Fullerton to first, the game extended, which meant that Surginer could throw a wild pitch to get the winning run back into scoring position, but Williams struck out to extend the game to the 11th. With the leadoff man aboard, neither Tony Delgado in the 11th, nor Shane Walter in the 12th managed to lay down a bunt, and the Coons were denied a run both times, lingering on until Will West allowed a leadoff walk to Douglas in the bottom 12th, a double to Soto, and finally the walkoff on Fullerton’s sac fly to deep left. 4-3 Crusaders. Carmona 2-6; Claros 2-4, 2B; Walter 2-6, 2B; Newman 3-6, 2 2B; Spencer 3-6, 3B, 2 RBI; Surginer 2.1 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 3 K;

Game 3
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – SS Stalker – RF Graves – CF Stevenson – C Tovias – P Chavez
NYC: 1B X. Garcia – 2B I. Flores – RF Fullerton – LF J. Williams – 3B Schmit – SS Loya – CF Douglas – C McPherson – P Hague

Sprinkling three walks around Williams’ single allowed Jesus Chavez to walk in a run right in the bottom of the first inning, which was too splendid to find words for it. The Critters would hit a pair of 2-out dingers in the second inning to take a 3-1 lead. Zach Graves’ solo shot tied it, and after Stevenson singled to center, Elias Tovias lifted #13, by now far and away the team lead, to get the Coons’ pointy black noses into the wind. Chavez did his best to blow the lead, walking Fullerton again in the bottom 3rd and running a 3-0 count to Williams, but he couldn’t have expected Williams to poke and fly out to center, as did Andy Schmit to end the inning. Williams batted again with two outs in the bottom 5th, having the tying runs aboard and in scoring position in person of Xavier Garcia (single) and Ivan Flores (walk…). Williams hit a fly to left center, Cookie made it to the ball, and the inning ended, with Chavez denied his rightful beating yet again.

When the Raccoons tacked on a run for a 4-1 lead in the sixth inning, they also did hardly deserve it. The inning began with Hague, normally of well control, throwing a wedgie to Shane Walter, putting the leadoff man on base. Nunley reached on a bloop single to shallow left, nary two steps behind Ricky Loya’s reach, and after that Stalker and Graves both tried their best to hit into a double play, but twice the middle infielders got crossed up and only got the runner at second base while Walter scored. Stevenson singled after that, but Tovias was denied a double and more damage to his ledger on a splendid Williams play in left center. Top 7th, Chavez led off with a hard single past Ivan Flores into rightfield, and Cookie doubled down the rightfield line, putting Chavez on third. Yet when Raul Claros grounded out rather slowly to second base, Chavez hesitated and wouldn’t move for home plate… Walter was walked intentionally to set up the double play on Nunley – which worked like a charm, grounder to Schmit, to second, to first, get off our lawn … At least the Critters managed to piece the last nine outs together between Chavez, Kipple, and Devereaux, and we’ll kindly gloss over the fact that Vince D almost blew it with two outs in the ninth after consecutive hard base hits by Perkins and Garcia. 4-1 Coons. Graves 2-4, HR, 2 RBI; Stevenson 3-4; Santos 1-1; Chavez 6.1 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 5 BB, 2 K, W (8-12) and 1-3;

Raccoons (53-72) vs. Miners (56-70) – August 24, 2023

This was the makeup game from last week, and we’d even get to see former Bayhawks Joao Joo (6-11, 3.90 ERA), who would have been up in last week’s getaway game as well if it hadn’t been for the rains. Joo was the third left-hander the Raccoons saw this week. Opposite him would be Chris McKendrick (6-7, 3.35 ERA). The Coons were trying to avoid a 3-game sweep against the Miners.

Game 1
PIT: CF J. Lopez – SS Becker – LF B. Adams – 1B Keen – 2B Rinehart – RF Feldmann – C Jolley – 3B Bahner – P Joo
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – CF Stevenson – 3B Nunley – RF Newman – 1B Walter – SS Stalker – C Delgado – P McKendrick

Fascinatingly, it looked like rain yet again, but the game at least got underway on time, and the Miners were really, really hoping hard that we could get through at least five innings and not exactly be tied. Jeff Rinehart wonked a McKendrick fastball for a second-inning leadoff jack to do the Miners’ quest to score at least one run justice, but while Joao Joo retired the first seven Raccoons to come to the plate, Tony Delgado would hit a double off him in the bottom 3rd. McKendrick failed to advance the runner, but Cookie hit a 2-out single, moving Delgado to third, and Spencer plated the catcher with a double to right. Cookie was held at third base after Ryan Feldmann kept the ball from reaching the corner, and was stranded when Stevenson flew out to Bill Adams, who had hit into an inning-ending double play in the top half of the inning, and Jayden Jolley would hit into one in the next half-inning.

The Raccoons had a chance to take the lead in the bottom 5th thank to Tim Stalker doubling off Joo,beating Adams’ reach in left-center. Delgado’s groundout pulled in Travis Bahner, allowing Stalker to go to third base, but the pitcher struck out, and Cookie’s bouncer was contained by Josh Keen to end the inning. Bottom 6th, rinse-repeat, Jarod Spencer hit a leadoff double over Jorge Lopez in center. Stevenson was walked intentionally, which was an odd selection, and Nunley’s single loaded the bases with nobody out! (Where does that excitement over three on, no outs come from?) No, the Critters would actually break through this time, starting with Newman’s sac fly. Walter flew out to right, but Stalker and Delgado hit consecutive 2-out RBI singles to shallow centerfield, and then Joo lost McKendrick on balls to reload the bases for Cookie, who regrettably flew out to Lopez in the 4-1 game. The Miners would reclaim a run off McKendrick in his final inning, the seventh, with Feldmann and Leo Otero contributing base hits, yet the Coons’ Will Newman pulled the run right back in the bottom 7th, plating Nunley with a long 2-out RBI double to center, 5-2, although that didn’t prevent the bullpen from almost cocking up an arbitrary number of runs in the eighth inning. Adam Cowen drilled Adams, Brotman walked Rinehart, and then it was Nunley to shag Feldmann’s vicious bouncer and collect the third out from the slugger. The required ninth-inning drama was on Tim Stalker to begin with, fudging Bahner’s grounder for a 1-out error, but Lillis then allowed a double to pinch-hitting Jon Pendergrass, bringing up the tying run. Jorge Lopez’ poor grounder kept the runners pinned and counted for the second out on a neat play by Lillis himself, and Nunley swiped Jeff Becker’s grounder and threw to first in time to end the game and salvage at least one win from the Miners. 5-2 Raccoons. Spencer 2-4, 2 2B, RBI; Stalker 2-4, 2B, RBI; Delgado 2-4, 2B, RBI; McKendrick 7.0 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 3 BB, 3 K, W (7-7);

Raccoons (54-72) vs. Thunder (63-63) – August 25-27, 2023

Fifth in runs scored, tenth in runs allowed, the Thunder weren’t quite a winning mix. They had the second-highest batting average in the CL, but like the Raccoons were considerably worse in terms of OBP and in the power department, ranking in the bottom three in the latter. They had the second-crummiest rotation, which wasn’t helped much by an average bullpen, and the bottom-of-the-league defense also didn’t help. Neither did a rash of injuries that had felled a good portion of the lineup including Mike Pizzo, Andy Bareford, Brian Roberts, and Will McIntyre. The season series was level at three and could still go either way.

Projected matchups:
Matt Huf (2-8, 5.11 ERA) vs. Jose Menendez (12-7, 4.11 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (8-8, 3.86 ERA) vs. Zach Weaver (6-8, 4.14 ERA)
Travis Garrett (3-6, 3.48 ERA) vs. Tim Sloan (6-16, 5.63 ERA)

Three right-handers, but they also had an off day, so who knows…

Game 1
OCT: SS L. Rivera – 3B B. Marshall – C A. Baker – RF Branch – LF W. Madrid – 2B Ts’ai – 1B F. Larios – CF Millan – P J. Menendez
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – SS Stalker – RF Graves – CF Stevenson – C Tovias – P Huf

Hopeless Huf ran 3-ball counts to the first three batters, allowing two singles and a walk to load the bases with nobody out. Ezra Branch struck out, but the respite was but brief, for Willie Madrid and Zhang-ze Ts’ai both drove in pairs with hard base hits, and Frank Larios hit an RBI single to put a 5-spot on Huf. Also looking bad was Tovias, who conceded two stolen bases without making a throw at all. Branch would get his RBI later on, knocking a leadoff jack to dead center in the third inning, which also ended Huf’s day. Adam Cowen and Will West would line up to cover as much as possible of this tear-jerking affair, in which the Raccoons had so far sent up the minimum, with Nunley singling to lead off the bottom 2nd, getting forced by Stalker, and Stalker was then caught stealing…

To be fair to this much-maligned team, they actually made a clawback attempt and got sufficiently close during the middle innings that you could say the Thunder were genuinely worried about what had looked like an easy win early on. First, the Thunder ran their lead to 7-0 when Adam Cowen walked Willie Madrid right after the Branch homer and the Thunder maneuvered him around to score, but Cookie drove home Tovias with a 2-out single in the bottom 3rd, and Josh Stevenson plated two with a 2-out double in the bottom 4th. The following inning, Raul Claros’ solo home run further narrowed the score to 7-4, but by the sixth inning Will West entered the fray, and my opinion of him was pretty firm and pretty bad thanks to years and years of quad-A level of lackluster relief. Adam Baker belted a 2-run homer off him in the seventh to move the Thunder away by five, with Lorenzo Rivera having drawn the bane of all managers everywhere, a leadoff walk. West was behind pretty much every batter, and after the Baker bomb allowed really hard singles to center to both Branch and Madrid. Ts’ai would ground sharply to short, Bullock (who had entered with West in a double switch earlier) starting a double play made out of pure salvation, ending the inning. There was no more drive in the Coons, and the only run the Thunder would score off West came in the ninth and was unearned, thanks to Nunley overrunning a ball for an error. 10-4 Thunder.

Matt Huf…….

Game 2
OCT: SS L. Rivera – 1B W. Madrid – LF Dobbs – RF Branch – C A. Baker – 2B Serrato – 3B B. Marshall – CF F. Larios – P Weaver
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – SS Stalker – RF Graves – CF Stevenson – C Tovias – P Gutierrez

Gutierrez would have faced the minimum the first time through the order hadn’t he walked Weaver with two outs in the third inning, which was the kind of thing that made you regret every career choice you ever made for both him and yourself. Lorenzo Rivera flew out harmlessly, but there was only so much booze to buy in Portland… Between Rivera’s throwing error and Weaver falling down on the ball, the Thunder put our battery on the corners with nobody out in the bottom of the third inning, and Cookie’s bouncer hit the edge between grass and infield dirt and escaped under Marshall’s glove for an RBI single, the first run of the game. Well, if you lack any skill at all, exploit your luck! It was also the only run to score in the inning, the next three batters making three fly outs to Frank Larios, Omar Larios’ half-brother.

Rico tried to make the most of the flimsy 1-0 lead, allowing only two hits and two walks, one of those intentional, through five innings. Alex Serrato singled in the top 5th, stole second base with two outs and the #8 batter up, and with the count at 2-1 the Coons didn’t hesitate, instead picking the third out from Zach Weaver. That didn’t mean that Gutierrez couldn’t still knock his own feet out from underneath himself; Brett Dobbs turned a full count into a 2-out walk in the sixth, then went to third on Branch’s single to right. Behind 2-0 on Adam Baker, Gutierrez’ unraveling accelerated and he plated the tying run with a wild pitch that actually whizzed past behind Baker’s back. Baker would end up singling, putting the Thunder 2-1 ahead, but the Coons would take Gutierrez off the hook in the bottom 6th. Weaver allowed a leadoff single to Walter, who moved to second base when Nunley grounded out to Madrid, then scored on Stalker’s single to center. A Graves walk, Stevenson grounding out, and an intentional walk to Tovias loaded them up and really forced our paw. Jonny Toner in his golden days would have batted for himself here – but Gutierrez was replaced by Raul Claros, who did not get an RBI in the spot and yet Gutierrez still got in line for the W because now Weaver threw a wild pitch to plate Tim Stalker. Claros walked after that, as did Cookie, wrestling a bases-loaded walk from Weaver in a full count to push in another run, 4-2. At that point, the Thunder sent right-hander Alex Telles to replace Weaver, with the Coons sending Newman to bat for an 0-for-3 Spencer, but Newman flew out to Larios in center to strand three anyway.

Top 7th, Brotman walked Bobby Marshall, the only batter he faced, then left Vince D to sort **** out with the tying run at the plate and nobody down, but blew the lead completely with doubles to center surrendered to John Elliott in the #9 hole and the pinch-hitting Ts’ai with two outs, the latter tying the game at four. And why stop there? David Kipple was blasted in the eighth, allowing a single to Baker, walking Serrato and then serving up a 3-piece to Marshall, and just like that the Thunder were ahead again, 7-4, and the Critters were seriously running out of pitchers. Not bothering about our puny problems, Lorenzo Rivera obliterated a tame breaking ball by Kevin Surginer for a 2-piece in the same inning, and Brett Lillis had to come into the ninth with Surginer’s runners on the corners, only to have his second pitch tatered by Frank Larios for his first career homer. By the time the Thunder were done stampeding all over them, only the finest dust remained of our pen after it had been eviscerated for ten runs in three innings. 12-4 Thunder. Bullock (PH) 1-1; Graves 2-3, BB;

Oh my.

Say, Mena, what exactly are the health risks for eating a pound or three of these lard-filled California Waves? – And if I eat it with all the pills I can find and a bottle of Capt’n Coma?

Game 3
OCT: 2B Ts’ai – 3B B. Marshall – C A. Baker – RF Branch – LF W. Madrid – 1B J. Elliott – SS Serrato – CF Bareford – P T. Sloan
POR: RF Carmona – 2B Claros – LF Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – SS Stalker – CF Stevenson – C Tovias – P Garrett

“Tragic” Travis’ first ten pitches resulted in two walks, no outs, and a greatly annoyed pitching coach strolling out to the mound, wordlessly slapping Garrett over the head with his Coons cap three times and strolling back to the dugout. It was not the consensus 21st century treatment of how to treat misbehaving youngsters, but it ****ing worked, as Garrett struck out the next two and Madrid popped out above home plate. Well, it worked briefly. By the third, Tim Sloan cracked a leadoff single (…), Marshall also singled, and Sloan scored on a groundout by Adam Baker before Garrett filled the bags, then relief on Spencer to snare Elliott’s drive to left to keep three stranded. That 1-0 deficit was not the greatest problem right now for the lineup; Stevenson drew a leadoff walk in the bottom 3rd and aided by a Tovias single came around to score on Cookie’s groundout to tie the game again, but the guys couldn’t get the fire in the dugout hot enough to roast the half oxen that the bench players kept rotating on a mighty big stick as per Matt Nunley’s instructions.

Also operating a big stick: Elias Tovias. The rookie catcher whipped his 14th homer of the season in the bottom of the fifth, a 2-piece that collected Stalker and broke the 1-1 tie, and also only the second Coons hit in the game. Tovias would add an RBI single in the seventh inning to run the score to 4-1, chasing home Nunley after his leadoff single. Stevenson had also singled in between. Meanwhile, Garrett had rebounded from the exceedingly rocky start and was carried through seven innings on 107 pitches, whiffing seven against four walks and only three base knocks. Graves batted for him in the bottom 7th with two on and one out, but ended the inning with a precise grounder into Ts’ai’s double play zone. By the eighth, it was Brotman again – maybe he could retire somebody THIS TIME. Strikeout to Marshall, handled Baker’s grounder himself, and strikeout to Branch. This shall be put down as a passing grade! In the ninth, Lillis got two outs on four pitches, but then Serrato doubled off the fence in right. No problem, Nunley was on his post when Andy Bareford grounded at him, ending the game with a timely throw for a bang-bang out at first base. 4-1 Coons. Stevenson 1-2, BB; Tovias 3-3, HR, 3 RBI; Garrett 7.0 IP, 3 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 4 BB, 7 K, W (4-6);

In other news

August 23 – The Wolves get crashed by the Stars, 17-3, with DAL 1B Justin Godown (.270, 13 HR, 61 RBI) collecting 5 RBI and his teammate INF/LF/RF Sean Bowman (.288, 0 HR, 16 RBI) landing four base hits, but driving in nobody. DAL LF/1B/CF John Contino (.238, 1 HR, 20 RBI) walks four times besides going 1-for-2 with one RBI.
August 25 – The Aces put up a real crooked number in the seventh inning of their 19-9 blowout of the Indians, plating no less than *14* runs on a procession of five relievers, two of whom retire nobody at all.
August 25 – Remarkably, SFB OF Dave Garcia (.275, 16 HR, 62 RBI) remained on his feet all the way to late August this year, but was finally felled by an oblique strain. The star outfielder that legally qualifies for disability benefits due to his residency on the DL could be out for the season.
August 25 – Agony in Milwaukee, as CF/RF Ian Coleman (.356, 4 HR, 72 RBI) faces a lengthy rehab process after breaking his kneecap and will watch the playoffs, which the Loggers still try to get into, laid up in a cast.
August 27 – Just returning from injury, NYC INF Sergio Valdez (.317, 5 HR, 33 RBI) drives in five runs in the Crusaders’ 15-3 rout of the Falcons, including a home run off CHA MR Elijah Taylor (0-0, 3.14 ERA).

Complaints and stuff

Omar Alfaro started a rehab assignment to AAA on Saturday. I don’t think it’s much of a spoiler to announce that we plan to bring him up on September 1 along with some other players.

In good news, the Elks were mathematically eliminated on Meltdown Saturday. Which is not helping *us*, but I like to keep them down with my boot in their neck while I still can.

The Crusaders this week offered 1B Josh Perkins for Travis Garrett straight up, which is actually amazing, because we’d turn “Tragic” Travis into an actual warm body with such a trade. However, for a first baseman, the 28-year-old Perkins is decidedly mediocre at the plate. At the time of the offer, he had spent most of the year in AAA, and had batted only for a .709 OPS in the majors. He had played a full season in the lineup in ’22 and had batted .284/.351/.422 with 16 homers and 84 RBI, which is decent, but not exactly knock-my-socks-off-it’s-Tetsu-reborn! …

It’s kinda sad the Coons can’t even grow first base prospects anymore. Seems like the only thing we can groom are relievers and .220 batters. Speaking about relievers, did you know that David Kipple was a third-round selection by the Elks in the 2016 draft, but was released by the end of the 2019 season and signed off the trash heap by the Coons the following March? He’s no Ron Thrasher, but he could actually become a very useful reliever with a long career if he could reel in the awful control a bit… He’s 24, there’s still some hope for that.

I don’t think there’s hope for Huf, or anybody else lingering in AAA. We might want to try and sign a serviceable starting pitcher this winter just to give the rotation some stability. You know, a Bobby Guerrero type of player that solidly pitches to a high-3, low-4 ERA without giving you more grief than you can handle. However, depending on how hard the Mexican Prick’s budget slash will be, money might be a bit short in the offseason.

However, there’s a bunch of free agents (Toner, Stevenson, Claros, Delgado) who amount to $4M in salaries this year, plus our share of Claros’ $520k deal. There is one more key personnel bullet point, and that is Brett Lillis. While signed to one more year at $1.8M, that year is a player option. If he voids it, we’re closerless, but we’d have more money to play with. Since Jonny Toner will be gone and I don’t foresee us signing anybody to a HUGE deal, next year’s top salary would be Shane Walter’s $2.5M.

The question one should ask here is whether we can actually flip him for at least one prospect at all, and would be better advised to maybe keep Claros around? But Claros can’t play first. What we really need is a first baseman, or to finally make up our mind about which parts of the next dynasty clearly aren’t going to work out. The jury can’t be out on Spencer (.666 career OPS), Stalker (.705), Graves (.710), and others forever. Is Omar Alfaro the real deal? Is it Elias Tovias? Who knows these things? Right now, with a keen eye, I fear that none of them are the real deal, and we’re still many years removed from contention…

Or, you know, release them all, burn this Tomb of Haunting Memories to the ground and start anew in Omaha, NE …

Fun Fact: The Raccoons have never been swept in a series by the Pittsburgh Miners.

It is true. In 18 encounters, the Raccoons have never lost all three games in a given year to Pittsburgh, and overall they are the team we have the very best all-time record against at 37-17 (.685). Not only have we lost a series to them only four times (including this year), but at one point almost three decades passed between series losses in 1980 and 2009.

Even during the Decade of Darkness, the Coons beat the Miners in all five encounters, going a total of 12-3 against them.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (55-74) vs. Bayhawks (70-60) – August 28-30, 2023

Somehow, a .538 clip was enough to lead the CL South, although the Baybirds were a few games under their expected record. It was still very much everybody’s division – with the exception of the Falcons, all CL South teams were within 4 1/2 games of another. The Hawks were average in scoring runs, but were in the top three where their starters’ ERA was concerned, and also their runs allowed overall, although they did have a shaky bullpen. Against the Raccoons, they had gone 4-2 this season.

Projected matchups:
Jesus Chavez (8-12, 3.92 ERA) vs. Rodolfo Cervantes (11-7, 3.54 ERA)
Chris McKendrick (7-7, 3.29 ERA) vs. Denzel Durr (9-11, 3.73 ERA)
Matt Huf (2-9, 5.57 ERA) vs. Graham Wasserman (12-8, 4.07 ERA)

Three right-handed batters are lined up for the Baybirds, although a prior off day on Thursday could allow them to move left-hander Mark Roberts (13-7, 2.72 ERA) into the series.

Game 1
SFB: CF V. Contreras – 3B Light – 1B Jon Gonzalez – LF R. Gomez – SS Sanks – C D. Rojas – RF Booker – 2B Quantrille – P Cervantes
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Graves – SS Stalker – CF Stevenson – C Delgado – P Chavez

The Bayhawks hit three singles (Sean Light, Jon Gonzalez, Rafael Gomez) in the top of the first, but also struck out three times and didn’t score. In fact, their first ten batters in the game either singled or struck out, five apiece, until Light grounded out to Matt Nunley to end the top of the second inning, and through four innings (which also saw some light rain, just not enough for a rain delay), Chavez’ ledger had seven each of hits allowed and batters whiffed, and still no runs allowed. The Coons had opened the first (Cookie) and second (Graves) with doubles, but would only convert the latter one into a run on Tony Delgado’s sac fly, the game’s only run through four innings. Chavez continued to be both amazing and erratic, although he would allow only one more hit in the game while running his strikeout total up to 11 in seven innings of work. He also drilled not one, but two batters with 0-2 pitches, so only the baseball gods knew how far he could have come in total. The Baybirds remained shut out against him, while the Coons added an incidental run in the sixth inning, Nunley singling home Jarod Spencer to get to 2-0, a lead that appeared to come off the board like wet wallpaper off the living room walls once the bullpen got their paws on the lead. Vince D got whacked around, walking Dave Rojas before allowing a single to Jaden Booker and an RBI double to Jeremy Quantrille in the top 8th. Jarod Spencer would hold the inning and the 2-1 lead together with a splendid play on PH Victor Sarabia’s quick grounder. The Coons pulled the run back in the bottom 8th, with Cookie hitting another leadoff double and this time actually being brought around with a Spencer single and Walter’s sac fly. Graves would also single, but runners were stranded on the corners when Will Newman batted for Tim Stalker, but whiffed just like Nunley had done earlier in the inning. The Raccoons had used Brett Lillis with great frequency recently and turned to Kevin Surginer in the ninth inning against the 2-3-4 batters, in other words, we were begging for it. Surginer however saved the game on three pitches – none of those completing Sean Light’s at-bat. At 2-1, the skies opened up for the second time in the game, and this time there was also lightning involved. The field was evacuated, the tarp came on and the game was called after 90 minutes’ worth of thunderstorms. 3-1 Raccoons. Carmona 3-4, 2 2B; Spencer 2-4; Graves 2-4, 2B; Delgado 1-2, RBI; Chavez 7.0 IP, 8 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 11 K, W (9-12);

Which is ONE way to get your first career save!

Game 2
SFB: CF V. Contreras – 3B Light – 1B Jon Gonzalez – LF R. Gomez – SS Sanks – C D. Rojas – RF Booker – 2B Quantrille – P Durr
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Newman – SS Stalker – C Tovias – CF Santos – P McKendrick

Cookie was caught stealing in the bottom of the first inning, but the Coons still cobbled a run together thanks to Walter walking and Nunley reaching on an infield single before Newman singled cleanly to right to get Shane Walter home, and the same part of the lineup made noise again in the bottom 3rd. Spencer (single), Walter (single), and Nunley (walk) all reached base to fill the sacks for Will Newman with nobody out. Newman’s error in the second inning on Booker’s soft fly had almost allowed the Bayhawks to topple McKendrick, and Newman was certainly eager to make a difference now, and eagerly struck out. Oh well, we’ve got more batters that aren’t just here for cold, calculating reasons. Tim Stalker hit a ball up the rightfield line, Jaden Booker couldn’t get to it, and Stalker had a 2-run double; Tovias scored Nunley with a groundout. Santos was put on intentionally to get Durr to strike out McKendrick, who now held a 4-0 lead. Newman came up again with Walter and Nunley aboard and two outs in the fourth, but grounded out to Gonzalez to keep them aboard.

All went comparably well for McKendrick until he hit a snag with two outs in the sixth inning. From one batter to the next, he served up beans that got peppered. Dave Rojas hit a single, Jaden Booker and Jeremy Quantrille hit doubles, and suddenly it was only a 4-2 lead anymore, and Sarabia was pinch-hitting for Denzel Durr. Brotman came out to face and retire the left-handed batter, who as the tying run, but grounded out to Spencer, who then hit a single to begin the bottom 6th. Walter also got on base again with a single off Marco de la Rosa, but Nunley flew out on a 3-1 pitch. Newman grounded to the mound, de la Rosa threw the ball into Shane Sanks’ legs for an error, and the bases were loaded with one down for Stalker again, and Tim Stalker also had a good day on this Tuesday and would do some more damage. Plenty, actually, creaming de la Rosa’s first pitch to deep left, high, deep – GRAAAAAAAAAAAND SLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMM!!!!

It does feel good to do that every once in a while. Did we even have a slam in ’23 so far?

The Raccoons tried to get length from Will West after that, which yielded mixed results. The 8-2 lead was shortened on Gonzalez’ solo homer in the top 7th, and West walked Victor Baeza, an injury replacement for Rafael Gomez, on four pitches, but then Baeza was caught stealing to end the inning. The eighth went smoothly for West, and in the bottom of the inning the Critters had three on and nobody out again, now for Santos against lefty David Jimenez. Santos struck out, and the Coons wanted West to finish the game and sent him to bat. We’re up by five – it should still be plenty. Once West though had spit out the remains of Jimenez’ bleached bones, they were up by seven thanks to a hard 2-run single to left center, West’s first career base hit in eight attempts. One more run would score on a Spencer sac fly, and Will West finished the game with only Victor Contreras’ single showing life from the Bayhawks in the ninth inning. 11-3 Raccoons! Spencer 3-5, RBI; Walter 2-3, 2 BB; Newman 2-5, RBI; Stalker 3-4, BB, HR, 2B, 6 RBI; Tovias 2-5, 2B, RBI; West 3.0 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 1 K, SV (1) and 1-1, 2 RBI;

Well, guess what – that was also Will West’s first career save! It came in his 133rd appearance and at 30 years of age.

He is truly a national treasure.

Game 3
SFB: CF V. Contreras – 3B Light – 1B Jon Gonzalez – SS Sanks – LF R. Allen – RF Booker – C R. Anderson – 2B Pick – P Wasserman
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Graves – SS Stalker – CF Stevenson – C Tovias – P Huf

The Coons suddenly had a paw on the season series going into game #9, but Matt Huf issued a 4-pitch walk to begin the game, so there was that. Contreras was thrown out by Tovias trying to take second base, while Cookie singled, stole, and scored on Walter’s sac fly to give Huf an early edge. Wasserman would shuffle the bases full after that with 2-out base hits allowed to Nunley and Graves, a walk to Stalker, but Stevenson struck out. As far as the Bayhawks were concerned, Contreras would walk again with two outs in the third inning and was sent for home on Sean Light’s double to right, but found himself thrown out again, this time by Zach Graves, ending the inning. Bottom 3rd, Nunley found Claros and Walter on the corners after leadoff singles, hit into a double play, but at least Claros scored, extending the lead to 2-0.

Huf kept wobbling on, walking Booker to begin the fifth inning, his third walk in the game (only?), and it was worth discussing every one of them, since the Baybirds managed to mess up every single gift they got. This time, Ryan Anderson smacked a ball at Claros, who turned a 4-3 double play, and Pat Pick struck out to get Huf through five scoreless. For a change, Huf drew a leadoff walk off Wasserman in the bottom 5th. The Coons would make their gift count – Raul Claros banged a 2-piece well past the rightfield wall, running the score to 4-0, and the Critters added an unearned run in the following inning after a throwing error by Pick. The Bayhawks, running into the sweep of sweeps, continued to not get the bats up against Huf, who ventured into the ninth inning on 100 pitches and with a 3-hit shutout. He’d face the top of the order, meaning that it was 2-walk Contreras to begin stuff. If he could get through Contreras, Huf might be good to go for a shutout! Contreras knocked the first pitch right at Claros for the first out, so maybe that shutout would actually happen! Light grounded out on the very next pitch, and Jon Gonzalez struck out to bury his team for good. 5-0 Furballs! Claros 2-4, HR, 2 RBI; Huf 9.0 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 3 BB, 4 K, W (3-9);

This was Huf’s first career shutout! I tend to forget that he is still only 23 years old, so maybe there’s still a way to turn his sorry bum around. Right now his career ERA is an unsightly 4.66 …

The Coons had the final day of the month off, robbing them of a chance to ruin their second winning month (14-13) of the season. We thus called up a few extra arms and sticks for September 1, adding Joe Moore again (but not Cory Dew, who was still out of whack), and 23-year-old left-hander Hector Morales would make his major league debut. We had picked him up from the Thunder last year in a trash deal for Dave Dyer and Ruben Pelles. Walks were an issue for him, but that is a team-wide illness… Juan Barzaga was also recalled.

We also added a few pretend-hitters in Manuel Cardona and Greg Borg. Both had already been up this season (as had Barzaga), with little (Cardona) or absolutely no (Borg) success. Also back up: Omar Alfaro! And, well, Isaiah Jones as third catcher / warm body.

There was a pinch in terms of the 40-man roster. For this, Jon McGrew and Brian Perakis were waived and DFA’ed.

Raccoons (58-74) @ Loggers (77-55) – September 1-3, 2023

Here was the second division-leading team we’d see this week, and maybe we could ruin their weekend, too? So far the Coons had a leg or two up on the Loggers, having won seven of the ten games this year against Milwaukee. The Loggers had the highest batting average in the CL, were second in runs scored, and fourth in runs allowed, so this was a team that had the vague shape of a playoff team. They just couldn’t beat the furry losers.

Projected matchups:
Rico Gutierrez (8-8, 3.83 ERA) vs. Pedro Hernandez (9-11, 3.51 ERA)
Travis Garrett (4-6, 3.33 ERA) vs. Jorge Villalobos (13-12, 3.56 ERA)
Jesus Chavez (9-12, 3.75 ERA) vs. Michael Foreman (16-2, 2.60 ERA)

The Loggers had no southpaws available for starts right now, so we’d go this week without seeing one.

Game 1
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – SS Stalker – C Tovias – CF Borg – P Gutierrez
MIL: SS Tadlock – LF Berntson – RF Gore – 1B Gasso – C Wool – 3B A. Velez – 2B Prince – CF W. Trevino – P P. Hernandez

Both teams put two on in the first inning, but neither got a man in, and the Loggers would break through in the bottom 3rd in headache fashion. Hernandez whacked a leadoff single, and although Ron Tadlock forced him out with a grounder, the Loggers were in business and unstoppable. Jon Berntson singled, Brad Gore doubled and plated two, and Gutierrez was dissolving at that point, walking Gus Gasso. Thankfully Matt Nunley would be on his post on the following two quick grounders in his direction, getting the last two outs in the inning without another run scoring. Gutierrez walked Tim Prince (…) leading off the bottom 4th, then served up Willie Trevino’s first hit of the season, a 2-run homer to left. An infield single by Tadlock and a hard 2-out RBI single by Gore got Gutierrez out of the game, down 5-0, with Surginer whiffing Gasso to end the inning. The Coons’ offense was mostly lame so far… Tovias hit a leadoff single in the top of the fifth, and Greg Borg, who had struck out his first time up, hit right into a double play… Hector Morales pitched a scoreless fifth in his major league debut, and drilled Tim Prince in the process.

Hernandez seemed to have the Coons under control, but suddenly Portland broke out the extra-base hits in the sixth inning. Cookie smacked a double, and Shane Walter homered to right center. Nunley doubled, Alfaro singled past Prince, and Stalker managed a run-scoring groundout before Tovias rolled out to end the inning. Suddenly it was 5-3 and much less gloomy, at least until Jon Berntson hit a 2-piece off Adam Cowen in the bottom 6th, and the Loggers battered Juan Barzaga for two more runs in the seventh. It was one of those games; Walter and Nunley got on base in the eighth inning, and it was a longshot for a comeback, but it was not even that anymore when Omar Alfaro smacked into a double play to Prince. The Loggers found another run in the eighth, the Raccoons wouldn’t… 10-3 Loggers. Carmona 2-4, 2B; Walter 1-2, 2 BB, 2 RBI; Nunley 2-4, 2B; Tovias 2-4;

Ouch.

Saturday brought rain galore, and no game was to be played. The game was moved to Sunday for a double header.

Game 2
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – SS Stalker – CF Stevenson – C Tovias – P Garrett
MIL: SS Tadlock – CF W. Trevino – RF Gore – 1B Gasso – C Wool – 3B A. Velez – LF Tesch – 2B March – P Villalobos

The Raccoons did not have a lot going early on, with “Tragic” Travis getting strafed by the third inning. He struck out three in the second, but struck out nobody in the third, which began with a leadoff walk (…!) to Dan March. Villalobos bunted him over, and then it was an RBI single by Ron Tadlock, and only got worse from there. Tadlock stole second base and made it to third on Tovias’ throwing error, and Brad Gore and Gus Gasso also landed base hits, including a looong RBI double for Gasso, to give Milwaukee a 3-0 lead after three.

The top 4th saw leadoff singles by Walter and Nunley, although the best the Critters managed after that was Villalobos’ run-scoring wild pitch to get them on the good ol’ board. The following inning Garrett hit a leadoff single, and after Cookie fouled out, Villalobos walked both Spencer and Walter to stuff the bags with the tying runs and more, with Nunley coming up. Matt kept the line moving with an RBI single to left, cutting the gap to 3-2, but Alfaro struck out with huge swings and not even remotely any contact. Stalker flew out to right. On to the sixth, where Garrett, constantly in trouble, was in trouble once more, as usual. He walked Alberto Velez with one out, and Brad Tesch doubled over the first base bag to move runners into scoring position. This was a big spot for March, who grounded back to the mound, keeping the runners pinned and being thrown out for the second out, and the score remained 3-2. The Loggers chose NOT to bat for Villalobos for a potential knockout blow, and Villalobos whiffed to end the inning and stranding a pair. That was Garrett’s 100th K on the season, and oh, if only the Coons could have mounted a comeback, but they went down in order in the seventh inning.

The bottom 7th saw Garrett retire the side in order before retreating to the showers. Villalobos remained in the game for the eighth inning and issued a leadoff walk to Matt Nunley. With the long bench and the small 1-run difference, the Coons sent Daniel Bullock to run for Nunley. Villalobos ran a 3-0 count to Alfaro, who then grounded foolishly to Gasso for the first out, which was something that could make you eat your baseball cap. Stalker and Claros (batting for Stevenson) both grounded out haplessly to keep Bullock aboard. But nevermind, they would get another gift chance in the ninth inning. Tim Dunkin got leadoff man Elias Tovias to ground to third base, and Alberto Velez had nothing better to do than to throw the ball over the head of Antonio Esquivel at first base. The tying run went to second base, with nobody out. Santos and Cookie were no help, making poor outs, but Spencer singled to center, and Tovias scored from third base to tie the game. Unfortunately, the Loggers stopped pulling boner moves after that, which meant the Coons failed to get the go-ahead run across, while emptying their pen in the first part of the double header. A procession of Kipple, Moore, Cowen, and Morales held the Loggers away after Garrett’s departure, with Will West taking over in the 13th inning. Josh Wool hit a leadoff single in the bottom 13th, but West started a double play on Velez’ grounder and got through the inning. I had no intention to replace West with anybody but Brett Lillis from here on out, and that was not West’s only double play gotten underway. He’d start another one on relief pitcher Ivan Morales’ in the bottom of the 16th inning. And no, you were not missing anything by nodding off in between, because neither team was getting even close to pushing the go-ahead or winning run across.

Maybe stupidity could decide the game. Spencer flew out to center to begin the 17th inning, after which Walter grounded on the infield. Gore hustled in from first base, but reliefer Luis Calderon never hustled over to first base. Walter had an infield single, reaching an unoccupied first base. Bullock grounded into a force play, and Alfaro struck out, and not even the other team’s stupidity could save the Critters anymore. Will West was totally dead after five scoreless innings in relief, but could still bunt Tim Stalker to second base after Stalker’s leadoff walk in the 18th. That was an actual, living runner in scoring position! The game had not seen such thing in a few hours. Here, Tovias was walked intentionally, pulling up Santos, except that we still had bats available. Newman batted for Santos, grounded out, which wasn’t helping, and that brought up a 1-for-8 Cookie, who was desperate for a base knock, as was the rest of the team. Cookie grounded to the right side, Gore came in again, and this time Calderon made the dash for first base. Which does not imply that he caught Gore’s feed, because he didn’t. The ball dropped, Cookie reached on the error, and the go-ahead run scored, approximately 28 hours and 77 minutes after the previous run had crossed home plate. It was not the last one in the inning: Spencer, Walter, and Bullock ALL hit RBI singles off Calderon and Jerry Counts, giving the Coons a 7-3 lead. Vince D ended the game against only a Velez single. 7-3 Coons. Walter 4-8, BB, RBI; Nunley 2-3, BB, RBI; Cowen 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 3 K; West 5.0 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K, W (2-1);

Cookie and Alfaro both went 1-for-9.

Well, thankfully we played *18*, which means we have already played two and can go ho-

I was just informed that it does not work that way.

Game 3
POR: 2B Claros – RF Graves – LF Newman – 3B Nunley – C Delgado – 1B Cardona – SS Bullock – CF Borg – P Chavez
MIL: SS Tadlock – CF W. Trevino – RF Gore – 1B Gasso – 3B A. Velez – LF de Santiago – C Padilla – 2B March – P Foreman

We would have called for some split duties in the double header anyway, but with the way the first game had gone down we flicked out as many players as possible. Matt Nunley was one exception since he had not even played nine, but most of the lineup had gone the distance in the first 5-hour affair. In terms of relievers, we only had Barzaga, Brotman, Surginer, and Lillis left over. If push came to shove, we’d throw in McKendrick in relief and summon some AAA scrub to Elktown for the Monday game.

Gus Gasso hit a 2-run double in the first inning to give the Loggers an early lead in front of a thinned crowd. Chavez got whacked around really hard by the Loggers, who strafed him for seven base hits in the first three innings, and Velez drove in another run in the bottom 3rd. The Coons had only one base hit against Foreman, and then Matt Nunley had hit into a double play… Between innings, Chavez got a thorough explanation that he would throw 100 pitches, whether he gave up three runs or thirteen, because there were only so many arms available…

Gore tripled in the bottom 5th, to which Chavez responded by balking him in, which was ONE way to keep the bases clean, but also stretched the Loggers’ lead to 4-0. Foreman threw seven shutout innings, being challenged only once when Zach Graves hit a double, and Chavez also lasted seven, although that was with considerably more baggage on his ledger, nine hits allowed compared to three for example, and of course down 4-0. Mike Kress pitched two scoreless innings to finish the game for the Loggers. 4-0 Loggers. Graves 2-3, 2B; Spencer (PH) 1-1, 2B;

In other news

August 28 – RIC SP Rich Guerrero (14-8, 3.60 ERA) whiffs six in a 4-0, 3-hit shutout over the Pacifics.
August 30 – The Capitals not only make up an 8-6 deficit in the ninth inning against the Wolves, but scorch them for nine runs in the ninth precisely, only to almost blow the game in the bottom of the ninth and allowing another four runs themselves, holding on to a 15-12 win. Washington’s Dave Menth (.292, 20 HR, 55 RBI) connects for four base hits, including a homer and a double, and 5 RBI.
September 1 – Crusaders and Canadiens combine for only six hits in their Friday game. Vancouver prevails, 1-0, on a ninth-inning home run by Tony Coca (.228, 7 HR, 56 RBI).
September 1 – Blue Sox rookie SP Jim Shannon (5-6, 3.18 ERA) spins a 3-hit shutout over the Miners. The Blue Sox also rout them for a holistic treatment, 12-0.
September 2 – SAL 1B Kevin Harenberg (.321, 11 HR, 83 RBI) is out for the year with an oblique strain.

Complaints and stuff

Can’t blame the team for donating a 17th win to Michael Foreman on Sunday night. The first leg of that double header took precisely 5:08. The second leg? Over in a crisp 2:22.

The loss on Friday was the 3,700th regular season defeat for Portland. Congratulations, Rico Gutierrez.

I’m sorry for being of so few words, but I witnessed 27 innings today too and I have to crawl onto a plane back to Portland while the team is already on the way to Elkland.

Fun Fact: 14 years ago today, Ricardo Garcia hit for the cycle in the Aces’ 14-2 drubbing of the Wolves, the 43rd cycle in ABL history. Garcia would also clinch cycle #44 the following year, becoming only the third and most recent driver with multiple cycles, joining Carlos León and Bruce Boyle.

Garcia made the All Star team in the latter year, his age 27 season, and his only nomination in his career, which ended at age 30 due to a torn back muscle. He batted .269/.330/.455 in his career with 126 HR and 627 RBI.

He never played for the Coons, but one of the other twice-cycler did: Carlos León came to the Raccoons on a 1-year deal in 1987, his age 30 season, and also the last one of his career, although in his case it was washing out of baseball. His .272 batting average for the ’87 Coons was accompanied by only six homers and 38 RBI, which might have been a factor in him ending up unemployed afterwards.

[Westheim]

The Raccoons began the week by activating Mike Rehbock from the DL for an additional bullpen arm, and also reassigned Brian Perakis and Jon McGrew to AAA after they had gone entirely unclaimed following waivers to remodel the 40-man roster at the start of the month.

Oh, to be 25 and not draw the least interest of 23 other teams!

Raccoons (59-76) @ Canadiens (46-89) – September 4-7, 2023

Believe it or not, but the Elks were actually on a 4-game winning streak and rallying from the depths of hell. The Coons had to play seven more against them, so they’d better take cover – so far we were up 7-4 against the stinking forest donkeys from the North. These two teams brought up the rear in the league in terms of runs scored, with the Elks still plating 36 more runs than us (…), but in turn they were outright the worst in most pitching categories. Who knows, maybe even the Raccoons could break out for an offensive week? So far we had scored a very uncharacteristic 4.8 runs per game against Vancouver in ’23.

Projected matchups:
Chris McKendrick (8-7, 3.28 ERA) vs. Bryce Sudar (2-0, 3.02 ERA)
Matt Huf (3-9, 5.08 ERA) vs. Greg Becker (3-7, 4.53 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (8-9, 4.01 ERA) vs. Bobby Guerrero (7-13, 4.51 ERA)
Travis Garrett (4-6, 3.36 ERA) vs. Bobby Thompson (4-4, 3.39 ERA)

That’s a right-handed rookie, a southpaw, a right-handed former Critter, and another southpaw – nice attempt at keeping the Coons off balance at the plate, but to be frank, they haven’t been balanced at the plate since Slappy unlocked the park in early March.

Game 1
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – C Tovias – SS Stalker – CF Santos – P McKendrick
VAN: 3B Jon. Morales – 1B Saenz – LF A. Torres – C Holliman – SS Calfee – CF Coca – RF Luckett – 2B Crosby – P Sudar

Sudar, who had only two decision in 11 games (7 starts) this year, had walk and strikeout numbers similar to Matt Huf, so there was hope for the Raccoons, who immediately began to encroach on him. Raul Claros drew a 4-pitch walk in the first, Shane Walter singled hard to right, and after Nunley regrettably whiffed, Omar Alfaro hit his first bomb off the DL, and it was a *real* bomb, a no-doubt 3-run homer, and it also made him only the second Critter to hit ten dingers in 2023. The Coons considered that 3-spot a job well done and laid themselves down for a nap, while McKendrick was not in serious trouble in his outing for the first four innings, yielding only one base hit to Omar Saenz, a 27-year-old September call-up. No, trouble only appeared on the horizon when Raul Claros dropped a pop by John Calfee in the bottom of the fifth inning, giving the Elks a 1-out base runner. Elijah Luckett grounded into a force, but McKendrick lost Adrian Crosby in a full count. Sudar hit a fly to left, but Cookie was on that one, stranding two Elks, the most they had put up in any one inning so far. Portland’s excruciatingly hesitant youth movement carved out another run of Sudar in the sixth thanks to a 2-out double by Alfaro, who then scored on Elias Tovias’ single to right center, 4-0.

McKendrick stopped functioning from one second to the next in the bottom of the inning, walking Alex Torres (of 32 stolen bases) in a full count before serving up consecutive and equally impressive bombs to both Ryan Holliman and John Calfee, which in a heartbeat moved the Elks back to 4-3, and caused my heartbeat to skip a couple o’ beats 300 miles further south. McKendrick got rid of Tony Coca to complete six, but was hit for by Jarod Spencer in the top 7th. Spencer grounded out harmlessly for the second out, but the Coons then got on base. Cookie singled to center, knocking out Sudar, but his replacement Fernando Ortega would concede another single to Claros and then walked Shane Walter to fill the bags for Matt Nunley, who was on two K’s and a double play. Well, the good news? He couldn’t hit into a double play here! The count ran full, making a strikeout a possibility, but Nunley put the seventh pich of the at-bat in play, a fly to deep right, plenty deep actually, really deep actually … GRAAAAAAAAAAAAND SLAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMM!!!!!

The Coons’ pen was in instant trouble in the bottom 7th, though, up 8-3 or not. Hector Morales saw two left-handers, walked them both, and with Luckett and Crosby aboard, Joe Moore allowed a single to Hiroaki Ryu into rightfield. Luckett turned third, Omar Alfaro didn’t think so and sledgehammered him out at home with a perfect rocket. The remaining runners moved into scoring position with one out, where they remained when Jonathan Morales grounded back to the mound, but Moore lost PH Bobby Rickard in a full count to fill the bags with two down, then allowed a bases-clearing double to Alex Torres into the depths of centerfield. Kevin Surginer inherited the 8-6 game, whiffed Holliman, and that was that. Surginer also killed off Calfee and Coca in the bottom 8th before Brett Lillis was sent out for a 4-game save with the Coons confidently enough to remove Cookie in a double switch, so things had to fall apart, absolutely. Luckett was retired to end the eighth, but Crosby legged out an infield single to begin the bottom 9th and Lillis then got bombed by Morales, which knotted the score at eight. Despite extra pitchers, one day after playing 27 innings with the Loggers the Coons were ill-equipped to play extras yet again, especially many extras, and had to move swiftly. So of course they only flicked their tails in the 12th inning with Billy Brotman pressed into long relief already. They faced 29-year-old September call-up Mario Aragon, a righty, in only his 15th major league appearance ever; Nunley hit a leadoff single, and Tovias and Stalker both walked after Alfaro hacked himself out. Bases loaded for… Greg Borg!? And we were also out of centerfielders entirely, so Borg had to bat and extended his sucking streak (his entire career) to 3-for-28 with a pop to second base. Jarod Spencer however, who had stuck in the #9 hole and was now playing leftfield, knocked a single up the middle to score two and break the tie. Priced veteran Will Newman struck out in Brotman’s place, and Vince D ended the game… just ignored the pair of 2-out walks to Holliman and Calfee in the bottom 12th that freaked me out considerably on my couch at home. 10-8 Furballs! Stevenson (PH) 1-1; Walter 3-5, BB; Nunley 2-6, HR, 4 RBI; Alfaro 2-6, HR, 2B, 3 RBI; Tovias 2-5, BB, 2B, RBI; Graves (PH) 1-1;

Game 2
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – RF Newman – 3B Nunley – CF Alfaro – SS Stalker – C Delgado – 1B Cardona – P Huf
VAN: 3B Jon. Morales – CF Coca – LF A. Torres – C Holliman – RF O’Rourke – SS Calfee – 1B Rickard – 2B Gura – P G. Becker

Despite facing the right-handed pushover Huf, the Elks didn’t find it in their hearts to put a single left-handed bat into the lineup, which was profoundly odd. Anyway, the Coons scored first, overcoming Huf’s failed bunt in the second inning that killed off lead runner Tim Stalker at third base for the second out and left Cardona and Huf on second and first, respectively, with Cookie’s fast RBI single through Ted Gura and then a wild pitch that plated Huf from third base. Yet up 2-0 the Coons turned into a Buster Keaton movie before long. Huf was about to retire the Elks on three grounders in the bottom 2nd, at least until Cardona dropped Nunley’s feed on what would have been the third out by John Calfee. Huf decided to spontaneously fold hard; he allowed an RBI double to center to Rickard, an RBI single to right to Gura, and for good measure Greg Becker also knocked a double before Morales drew four balls to get onto the open base. Tony Coca belched a slam over the leftfield fence, and the Raccoons were in arrears 6-2 all of a sudden, all runs on Huf being unearned thanks to some completely inept rookie at first base. If I hadn’t been a country away I would have stormed onto the field to strangle him with my bare hands right away. Making things worse, Cardona came to bat with the bases loaded and two down in the top 3rd and rolled out to Morales easily, letting Becker get out of the jam he walked himself into. Becker walked five in 3+ innings but the Coons found ways to wiggle out of scoring situations, f.e. with Will Newman’s inning-ending double play in the fourth…

Top 6th, bases loaded, no outs; Delgado singled, Cardona somehow singled, and Shane Walter walked in Huf’s place. The Elks would not respond to the threat at hand. Not after Cookie’s RBI single, not after Spencer’s sac fly, and not before Will Newman walloped a 3-run homer to flip the score in Portland’s favor, 7-6 (which ironically put Huf in line for a W), after which Emmanuel Castaneda replaced Becker. Huf’s W didn’t live long, thanks to the Elks loading them up with nobody out in the bottom of the very same inning. Adam Cowen walked two in addition to a Nunley error, and that was not the last error in the inning. Gura hit a sac fly, after which Moises Berrones batted against Surginer, who had replaced the hapless Cowen. He grounded in front of the plate, Delgado jumped out and fired to second… or maybe more to centerfield. Calfee scored from second, giving Vancouver the lead, runners were in scoring position and came home on Morales’ double to right center, at which point the garbage game went to Will West, who allowed another run on Torres’ 2-out single in the same inning. Here were two horrible teams that had just exchanged terrible 5-spots. The Elks led 11-7, and nine of their runs were unearned. The Elks would add another run in the eighth – earned – against Mike Rehbock, who also well deserved it for allowing a single, two walks, and a wild pitch… the Raccoons wouldn’t threaten in the last three innings. 12-7 Canadiens. Carmona 2-4, BB, 2 RBI; Bullock (PH) 1-1; Newman 2-5, HR, 3 RBI; Jones (PH) 1-1; Cardona 2-4; Walter (PH) 1-1;

If you consider this entertainment, isn’t then gawking at crash victims being cut out of their cars on the Interstate entertainment as well?

Game 3
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – C Tovias – SS Stalker – CF Stevenson – P Gutierrez
VAN: 1B Jon. Morales – 3B Ryu – LF A. Torres – C Holliman – RF O’Rourke – SS Calfee – CF Coca – 2B Gura – P B. Guerrero

Saw what a right-handed lineup did to Huf and the boys? Wonder what it can do to Gutierrez? Rico would also not face a left-handed bat in this lineup. Torres singled off him in the bottom 1st, but was caught stealing, and the Critters scored first again; Alfaro singled, Stalker doubled in the top 2nd, and Stevenson’s groundout brought at least one run home before Gutierrez whiffed to end the inning, but Guerrero allowed four singles and another two runs in the third inning. Spencer, Walter, and Nunley all hit 1-out singles, Alfaro drove a ball to center for a sac fly, and Tovias hit an RBI single to left, 3-0. Elias would actually throw out Torres a second time in the game, then in the and ending the bottom 4th, leaving Gutierrez to face one over the minimum through four shutout innings. Of course, with these Coons disaster was always just looming around the corner…

Bottom 5th, Gutierrez spilled leadoff walks to Dave O’Rourke and John Calfee. Coca grounded at Nunley, who took the force out at his own base to keep runners on first and second, now with one out. Unfortunately, Tovias was then charged with a passed ball, losing a pitch to Ted Gura under his fat bum, and Gura would end up hitting a sac fly. Guerrero skipped a ball to Stalker that was going to end the inning, unless Stalker would throw it past Walter and into the dugout, which was exactly what happened. Coca scored from second on the 2-base error, and suddenly it was a 3-2 game. Gutierrez walked Morales in a state of bewilderment, but Ryu would strike out to keep the Elks short on runs, 3-2, and hits, 8-1, through five innings…

But, ah, the Elks were nothing if not outrageous. There was a reason for none of the games in the series being attended by more than 12,000 fans. Top 6th, Ryu’s throwing error put Tovias on second base leading off, and a wild pitch advanced him to third. A second wild pitch, still to Tim Stalker, scored the run, 4-2. Stevenson would later reach base in the inning, after which Gutierrez struck out bunting … it was a majestic event to witness, a bit like seeing the Hindenburg’s fireball crash to earth…

The Coons failed to knock out Guerrero in the top 7th when Walter and Nunley were aboard with one out, but Bobby struck out both Alfaro and Tovias, then proceeded to instead kick Gutierrez from the game in the bottom 7th with a 2-out single to right. Joe Moore replaced him and struck out Jonathan Morales to keep the Coons’ 4-2 lead afloat. Vince D handled the eighth, while Guerrero went 8.1 innings before walking Spencer in the ninth and getting replaced by former Coons farmhand Dan Moon. Spencer was caught stealing to accelerate the Critters’ non-scoring attempts, and the bottom 9th went to Lillis with a 2-run lead and the 5-6-7 batters up. Lillis conceded a single to O’Rourke to begin the inning, threw a wild pitch, but somehow the Elks ran out of spark at that point, being retired on three easy pops or flies afterwards. 4-2 Coons. Walter 3-5, 2B; Gutierrez 6.2 IP, 3 H, 2 R, 0 ER, 5 BB, 6 K, W (9-9);

Game 4
POR: SS Stalker – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – LF Newman – RF Alfaro – C Tovias – CF Stevenson – 3B Bullock – P Garrett
VAN: 3B Jon. Morales – CF Coca – LF A. Torres – RF O’Rourke – SS Calfee – C Tanzillo – 1B Rickard – 2B Crosby – P B. Thompson

Stalker got struck, stole second, and was starved right there in the first inning, but the Critters still scored first for all the games in the series, owing that feat to Elias Tovias’ solo homer in the second inning, his 15th this year. The Coons added a run in the third, with Stalker getting nailed AGAIN by Thompson, and this time coming around to score on a wild pitch and Spencer’s single to left center. Meanwhile, Travis Garrett struck out six the first time through, but with him it was only a matter of time for tragedy to strike… But before that could happen, Josh Stevenson tripled in Alfaro and Tovias in the fourth inning, running the score to 4-0 thanks to Tony Coca taking a circuitous and ultimately fruitless route to his fly ball. Bullock singled him in, 5-0, and after Garrett’s bunt put the second out on the scoreboard, Tim Stalker avoided all the pitches aimed at his head and doubled on the one that was to his liking, 6-0. That was it for Thompson, his replacement Jasper Devitt getting Spencer to ground out to end the inning. Devitt also singled off Garrett in the fifth, but the Elks couldn’t touch him as whole. Against their four hits in five innings off “Tragic” Travis, they had also struck out nine times. Shane Walter made an error to extend the bottom 6th, but the Elks couldn’t score Alex Torres, either, although Garrett reached 98 pitches by the end of the sixth, so he would not collect a shutout in this game. Garrett did bat for himself in the seventh, though, hitting a leadoff single off and returning a favor to Devitt, but Stalker hit into a double play. Garrett faced five more batters, retired them all, including four more strikeouts, but 115 pitches was enough, especially with him approaching the heart of the order. This was not a no-hit bid; those had different rules. Ask Brownie and Toner throwing 130+ in no-hitters. Morales and Barzaga would collect the final four outs without incident, while the Coons had even piled on three more runs in the eighth inning, including a 2-run homer by Alfaro. 9-0 Furballs! Spencer 2-5, RBI; Alfaro 2-5, HR, 2 RBI; Tovias 2-3, HR, RBI; Stevenson 2-4, 3B, 2B, 2 RBI; Garrett 7.2 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 14 K, W (5-6) and 1-3;

Travis Garrett’s 14 strikeouts were by far his best output in the major leagues, beating an 11 K outing against the Condors in 2020. Yes, he has annoyed us for that long. Even longer actually, debuting in 2019.

The Coons lost Josh Stevenson to a hip strain late in the game. He was moved to the DL, but would be able to return this season. In his absence, maybe Omar Alfaro could get some more reps in center, and maybe Greg Borg would get enough at-bats for a fourth major league hit?

Raccoons (62-77) vs. Indians (63-77) – September 8-10, 2023

Suddenly this was a battle for fourth place in the division, and also the last meeting between these two teams, neither of which were yet mathematically eliminated from the playoffs, but had been, spiritually, for many months. The Indians held an 8-7 edge in the season series, but were consistently crummy, ranking in the bottom four in both runs scored and runs allowed in the Continental League.

Projected matchups:
Jesus Chavez (9-13, 3.81 ERA) vs. Jordan Caldwell (7-12, 4.33 ERA)
Chris McKendrick (8-7, 3.35 ERA) vs. Rich Hood (1-2, 3.92 ERA)
Matt Huf (3-9, 4.85 ERA) vs. Alvin Smith (7-7, 3.92 ERA)

Yup, that’s ex-Coon Rich Hood rearing his ugly head again. After spending years in oblivion, he had pitched to a 5-7 record with a 3.51 ERA with last year’s Elks, and now had broken free of AAA constraints to work his way into the rotation again at age 36. Of course, injuries had to do with the left-hander’s resurgence. The Indians were without both Tristan Broun and Manny Ortega from their rotation, and were also missing a couple of regulars in Lowell Genge, Erik Janes, and Bob Reyes.

Game 1
IND: 2B R. Mendez – 3B J. Jackson – RF C. Martinez – 1B M. Rucker – LF T. Ruiz – CF Faulk – C Calhoun – SS Benedetto – P Caldwell
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – C Tovias – SS Stalker – CF Borg – P Chavez

Exceedingly harmless early on, not something they had shown in Vancouver, the Raccoons would get only one hit the first time through the order, and that was by Chavez. Cookie and Alfaro both drew leadoff walks in the first two innings, but sometimes not hitting into a double play right afterwards was all the success you could possibly get. At least Chavez shut out the Indians for the early innings, despite them landing a bunch of hits against him. Offense didn’t start until the fourth inning, with Omar Alfaro peppering a 1-2 pitch by Caldwell over the rightfield fence, his 12th dinger of the year. Tovias and Stalker would both reach base after that, and then we got some actual semblance of life from Greg Borg, who doubled off the wall in left for a 2-run double to run the score to 3-0. The Coons would throw up another 3-spot in the following inning when Elias Tovias collected Walter and Alfaro with a truly towering 2-out, 3-run homer, jumping the score to 6-0 with his 16th bomb of the year, a 410-footer to right center. Meanwhile, the Arrowheads had nothing against Chavez anymore; after collecting four base hits in the first four innings, they went down entirely in order from the fifth through the eighth innings. His pitch count reached 99 through eight, but with a 6-run lead, he would get the chance to complete the job for sure in the ninth inning, then facing the heart of the order. Cesar Martinez flew out to Borg on the 100th pitch, but Mike Rucker would end Chavez’ day with an absolute, raw, blinding moon shot estimated at 452 feet that was outta here in no time at all. A.J. Faulk would hit another off David Kipple, Chavez’ replacement, and the game didn’t end until after Will West walked Justin Calhoun, with Borg catching another fly hit by Jason Benedetto. 6-2 Coons. Alfaro 2-2, 2 BB, HR, RBI; Chavez 8.1 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 6 K, W (10-13) and 2-3;

Whee, fourth place!

Game 2
IND: 2B R. Mendez – CF D. Morales – RF C. Martinez – 1B M. Rucker – C T. Perez – LF T. Ruiz – 3B J. Jackson – SS Benedetto – P Hood
POR: SS Stalker – 2B Spencer – RF Alfaro – 3B Nunley – LF Newman – CF Santos – 1B Cardona – C Jones – P McKendrick

McKendrick was roughed up right out of the gate, losing Rich Mendez to a leadoff walk and then conceding runs on RBI doubles by Cesar Martinez and Mike Rucker. Tony Perez walked, but Tony Ruiz hit into a double play to keep the Indians to two runs. Their advantage would not be final yet, with Rich Hood being known to drink away leads in a hurry. In this particular case he faced the opposing pitcher with two outs and Cardona and Jones aboard in the bottom 2nd, and inexplicably walked McKendrick on four pitches before allowing a game-tying 2-run double to Tim Stalker. Spencer grounded out, stranding a pair, but hit a 2-out RBI single the very next inning. It was the sixth and final single off Hood in that inning, which also saw a walk issued, and the Coons plating four runs to take a 6-2 lead, first attained with Manuel Cardona’s sac fly that scored Matt Nunley. Laden with ten hits and six runs, Rich Hood would not reappear for the fourth inning.

Some ill control ran up McKendrick’s pitch count, although he “only” walked three in six innings of work. He was hit for in the bottom 6th with two outs and the bases loaded for Mat Stone. A Rich Mendez error had just put Isaiah Jones aboard to extend the inning, one play after long man Pablo Correa had left the game with an injury after 2.2 scoreless innings. Raul Claros drew a full-count, bases-loaded walk in McKendrick’s place, forcing in another run in the now 7-2 game, while Stalker’s fly to left was caught by Ruiz. More offense occurred in the bottom 7th, with Spencer singling, stealing, scoring on Alfaro’s single, and Alfaro was also brought around to score eventually on Frank Santos’ sac fly. The Coons pumped out 18 hits in the game, creaming the Indians as they ended up being held to three hits, and the two runs they had scored right at the start of the contest. 9-2 Raccoons! Stalker 2-4, BB, 2B, 2 RBI; Spencer 4-6, RBI; Newman 3-5; Santos 3-4, RBI; Jones 2-4, BB, RBI; Claros (PH) 0-1, BB, RBI; McKendrick 6.0 IP, 2 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 3 BB, 6 K, W (9-7);

The Correa injury was already the second of the game for the Indians, who had previously lost Cesar Martinez on a defensive play. Both were ultimately only diagnosed with some soreness or other, and both were not ruled out for the Sunday game.

Game 3
IND: 2B R. Mendez – CF D. Morales – RF C. Martinez – 1B M. Rucker – C T. Perez – LF T. Ruiz – 3B J. Jackson – SS Greene – P A. Smith
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – C Tovias – SS Stalker – CF Borg – P Huf

Portland struck first, although Shane Walter also struck the Coons themselves with his run-scoring double play grounder to short in the bottom 1st. Cookie – after singling and stealing – scored, Claros was wound up. Tovias hit into a double play in the second, and Shane Walter’s throwing error in the third cost the team the early lead. A terrible throw behind Huf put Justin Jackson on third base to begin the inning, and Huf didn’t recover from that, conceding the run on Smith’s bunt and Mendez’ groundout. Bottom 3rd, Greg Borg led off with a bloop single into shallow left, and now the Coons had two productive outs before Claros’ RBI single into right and in front of Martinez regained them the lead, 2-1.

67 pitchers got Matt Huf through five innings with a no-hitter, which was both a splendid and a frightening thing at the same time, because you didn’t want to feel obliged to maneuver him into late innings with a wonky 1-run lead. His spot also came up in the bottom 5th with Greg Borg on first base and one out. Huf bunted up the third base line, and Rucker would not be anywhere near Jackson’s horrendous throw that gave the Coons two free bases, but Cookie struck out and Claros lined out to centerfield to keep the runners aboard.

Matt Huf removed the 1-2-3 batters on 13 pitches in the sixth, then started with strikeouts to Rucker and Perez in the seventh. The Rucker K put him at 100 for the season, achieved in 114 innings. If only those 76 walks weren’t there… Tony Ruiz hit a hard fly to right, pretty deep, but Omar Alfaro hustled back and made the catch on the track, ending the seventh. Huf’s bid cracked right down the middle with a leadoff walk to Jackson in the eighth inning, and he even took eight pitches to do it. It put him at 104 for the game, and with six outs to collect, things looked bleak for him AND the team, given that there was still only a 2-1 lead on the board. Justin Calhoun popped out, after which Jaylen Rolland pinch-hit in the #9 hole and ran another full count. Heavy-heartedly we were going to remove Huf after his one anyway, and when Rolland singled to center, the bid was gone anyway. Vince D replaced Huf, struck out both Mendez and Morales atop the order, and maintained the lead in the inning. The Coons put Walter (double) and Alfaro (intentional walk) aboard in the bottom 8th, but couldn’t push through against Brian Gilbert, leaving Brett Lillis with the tender 2-1 lead in the ninth, and also with a season series win in the balance. Jarod Spencer also replaced Claros for defense, handled two fast bouncers for the first two outs from Martinez and Rucker, and Lillis would then incinerate Tony Perez on strikes. 2-1 Furballs! Claros 2-4, RBI; Alfaro 1-2, 2 BB; Borg 2-3; Huf 7.1 IP, 1 H, 1 R, 0 ER, 3 BB, 9 K, W (4-9);

In other news

September 4 – Atlanta utility player Brody Folk (.257, 8 HR, 61 RBI) shines in the Knights’ 16-6 victory over the Falcons, hitting a home run, a double, and a single, and driving in six runs in the effort.
September 5 – BOS 3B/2B Rhett West (.225, 2 HR, 25 RBI) is out for the year with a torn back muscle.
September 6 – The Thunder walk off on the Bayhawks in the 10th inning for a 5-4 win in the truest sense of the word as San Francisco’s Tony Harrell (5-4, 3.75 ERA, 33 SV) issues straight walks to Zheng-ze Ts’ai, Omar Millan, Lorenzo Rivera, and Frank Larios (.545, 1 HR, 8 RBI in 22 AB).
September 7 – TOP INF Kyle Burns (.251, 3 HR, 35 RBI) is out for the season with a broken elbow that will take at least six months to heal.
September 9 – The Knights’ C Ruben Luna (.287, 24 HR, 95 RBI) drives in five runs on two hits and two walks in Atlanta’s 13-1 drubbing of the Thunder, including a grand slam off OCT MR Manuel Chavez (0-0, 10.00 ERA).
September 10 – Done for the season with a torn back muscle is PIT SP Josh Knupp (10-12, 4.06 ERA).

Complaints and stuff

None of our minor league affiliates made the playoffs this year. The Ham Lake Panthers came closest, currently sitting six games out with only a few games to play. The St. Petersburg Alley Cats are right at .500, but things were rough as usual for the Aumsville Beagles, who did not come close to the .400 mark and narrowly missed 90 losses in their 140-game campaign, with a run differential exceeding -200.

I have earmarked 23-year-old right-hander Juan Mendez to start the extra game during the upcoming double header with the Loggers on Monday. He was signed in the 2016 IFA period, costing us a tiny $18k, or three Daniel Bullock’s worth. He throws five pitches, none amazing, and his control is spotty, but isn’t it for all pitchers in the organization? This will be Mendez’ major league debut after going 5-9 with a 4.03 ERA in AAA this year. He also saved six games during a brief stint in the pen. Overall he has thrown 147.1 innings in 31 games (21 starts), walking 81 and whiffing 96.

Slowly, slowly, I am starting to feel like not all might be lost with our current set of youngsters. Granted, Omar Alfaro’s slash doesn’t scream PERENNIAL ALL STAR right now, but do you still remember what he amounted to in 151 AB in 2022?

.159/.226/.219 – no comparison to today!

Tovias is blind as a bat and a weak-armed catcher at that, but he could generate some worth if he continues to hit for power, which is a comparable skill set to Craig Bowen, who was something of a folk hero a decade ago here. We still have Cookie and Nunley to stick around them, but the problem is that we do not really have any leadoff material right now. Yes, Cookie is leading off every day, but it’s more of no-better-idea thing.

The weakest link might just be Jarod Spencer, who is slapping singles, but has a poor OBP. He has good defense and speed, but we really need somebody for the #1/#2 holes. Getting on base persistently was something that Raul Claros has always been quite good at. His career OBP is .351, and he’s still only 30 years old (he hit the three-oh this Tuesday). If Alfaro and Tovias continue to get better, Cookie returns somewhat to form, and Matt Nunley can maybe find a few doubles in his bat, this lineup should produce a lot more runs. Tim Stalker doesn’t knock your socks off, but he’s a good defensive shortstop. He’s allowed to bat .260/.340/.380 or so without hurting the team…

Of course, a star starting pitcher wouldn’t hurt… although I might want to stop worrying, at least now that Matt Huf has not allowed an earned run in his last three starts. Yes, he coughed up six unearned runs on Tuesday, in one innings, but … eh.

Maybe, maybe we can aim for a winning record next year?

This kind of delusion deserves punishment…

Fun Fact: The 16 home runs hit by Elias Tovias so far this season tie him for seventh place all time amongst Raccoons rookies – that is, if you are including efforts from the 1977 season when technically all ABL players were rookies, and three 16+ HR efforts were put up that year by Ben Simon (21, the highest total ever for a Coons rookie), Ed Sullivan (20), and Pedro Sánz (17).

If you want only players in a grown-up league on the list, there’s one 16+ HR performance from each of the four full decades that the league existed. Matt Workman was the Raccoons’ best guess for their first baseman after Wyatt Johnston retired and before they flipped him in a package for Tetsu Osanai, which is its own story meriting retelling at some point, also because you can rub it into the Elks at that point. Workman hit 18 bombs in 1982, when he was technically a rookie, but factually already 27 years old. Workman won three Rookie of the Month honors that season, but lost out on the Rookie of the Year award against some left-handed pitcher from north of the border that happened to win 19 games that year, some chap named Kisho Saito.

Ten years later, Vern Kinnear bopped Daniel Hall out of leftfield and also 16 homers out of the park. He did go on to win the Rookie of the Year award later that season, batting a fantastic .311/.404/.516 long before exchanging the black #9 on the brown shirt for the yellow #16 on the blue shirt.

In 2003, the Raccoons were in the deepest doldrums and clinging to every faint bit of hope they could find while running up their seventh losing season in a row. Chris Beairsto batted only .241, but the kid banged out *17* dingers in just *78* games! No doubt he’s gonna be a superstar!! Turns out, this Canadian left-handed swinger would swing quite freely without ever replicating this success. He did hit 18 home runs in a full season for the Bayhawks in 2006, but dropped to a .181 batting average the next year and was out of the majors for good by the time he was 29. He did not win Rookie of the Year honors – that title went to another Raccoons, Eddie Torrez, another one of those sad stories…

The highest mark by any post-1977 Raccoon in terms of rookie dingers was then set in 2015. The Coons came off a losing season their only one between 2007 and 2021, and had made some shrewd moves to bring in fresh blood, which included a shortstop picked up from the Cyclones in exchange for Graham Wasserman, who had made two starts for Portland the previous year and had been roughed up for 10 runs in 6.1 innings total. McKnight was an instant smash in Portland after some token at-bats with Cincy in 2013/14 and batted .278 with 20 home runs and 91 RBI to become the team’s second consecutive Rookie of the Year, following Matt Nunley.

Life was good in 2015. It was the year of Jonny Toner’s first Pitcher of the Year award. He’s still on the DL and also a free agent.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (65-77) vs. Loggers (80-61) – September 11-14, 2023

Hey, let’s play five! What had been a 4-game set now opened with a double header on Monday, including a makeup game that had been rained out on June 18. The Loggers had the highest batting average, were third in runs scored, and also a decent fifth in terms of runs allowed, but all of that had not helped them a whole lot against the Raccoons in ’23, as they were pretty close to losing the season series, coming in with a 5-8 deficit.

Projected matchups:
Rico Gutierrez (9-9, 3.86 ERA) vs. Pedro Hernandez (11-11, 3.49 ERA)
Juan Mendez (0-0) vs. Morgan Shepherd (10-13, 4.29 ERA)
Travis Garrett (5-6, 3.14 ERA) vs. Jorge Villalobos (13-12, 3.39 ERA)
Jesus Chavez (10-13, 3.68 ERA) vs. TBD
Chris McKendrick (9-7, 3.33 ERA) vs. TBD

The poor Loggers had a mighty bad problem. They led the division by half a game, they had to play two on Monday, but they had already played two on Sunday! Worse yet, they had been swept on the weekend by the Elks, so this was a team in a state of falling apart. They didn’t know whom to pitch themselves, and our best guess above already has Villalobos pitch on short rest on Tuesday. Michael Foreman (17-3, 2.66 ERA) and Ian Prevost (14-9, 2.63 ERA) both went (and lost) on Sunday, and are unlikely to appear in the series. All of these five are right-handed starters.

I guess we’ll be surprised?

Game 1
MIL: SS Tadlock – 2B Stewart – RF Gore – 1B Gasso – C Wool – 3B A. Velez – LF Berntson – CF W. Trevino – P P. Hernandez
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – C Tovias – SS Stalker – CF Borg – P Gutierrez

Gus Gasso hit his first home run of the season right in the first inning, collecting Brad Gore and his 2-out single to give the Loggers an early 2-0 lead against a merrily missing Gutierrez. Although, him missing was probably preferable in this outing; both Alberto Velez and Jon Berntson hit mighty deep drives in the second inning, both to left. Cookie snared Berntson’s but couldn’t catch up with Velez’, which escaped for a leadoff jack, 3-0. When the Raccoons got onto the board, it was a wicked chain of events that was very Loggers-like. Errors by Velez and Ron Tadlock put Borg and Cookie on the corners with one out in the bottom 3rd. Claros popped out, but Shane Walter – who had singled in the bottom 1st, extending a 10-game hitting streak – was drilled to fill the bags. Nunley’s 2-out grounder could not be dug out by Tyler Stewart, leaving Matt with a run-scoring infield single, but unfortunately Omar Alfaro flew out to center to keep the Coons to their single, doubly-unearned run.

While Gutierrez settled in after the rocky start and held the Loggers at bay in the middle innings, the nature of the Raccoons’ offense was mostly token and mandatory through five innings. They batted because they had to, not because they wanted to change the course of events transpiring. In the bottom 6th however, they at least put Hernandez in the pressure cooker. Walter singled, Nunley walked, Alfaro singled – three aboard, nobody out in a 3-1 game! Hernandez’ lead evaporated on Tovias’ hard-cracked RBI single into shallow right, and then Tim Stalker’s sac fly to right. Greg Borg grounded to short, but Stewart dropped Tadlock’s feed for an error that restocked the bags. Zach Graves batted for Gutierrez and his RBI single to left put Gutierrez in line for the W. Cookie singled and scored two before the Loggers finally yanked Hernandez and Luis Calderon restored order. It was too late for the Loggers’ bid to maintain the lead in the division on this day, though, because between Billy Brotman, Will West, and Brett Lillis, the Raccoons conceded only two more base runners, and no runs. 6-3 Coons. Walter 2-3; Nunley 2-3, BB, RBI; Alfaro 2-4; Graves (PH) 1-1, RBI;

The Loggers. Please never change.

Now, for a change, this: the makeup of June 18’s rainout was… rained out. We’d try to play two tomorrow then.

For Tuesday, the Raccoons would retain Mendez in the nighcap, so “Tragic” Travis moved up into the second game of the series. Garrett would be responsible for not ending our season-high 6-game winning streak.

Game 2
MIL: SS Tadlock – LF de Santiago – RF Gore – 1B Gasso – C Wool – 3B A. Velez – CF Tesch – 2B March – P Shepherd
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – C Delgado – SS Stalker – CF Borg – P Garrett

“Tragic” Travis was exceptional at handling pressure – he issued three walks, a balk, a single, and yet somehow only one run in the first inning, throwing 36 pitches in the first inning of (probably?) a double header. Salvation arrived in the bottom 1st in form of three of the top four reaching base (with Spencer forcing out Cookie), and Alfaro drawing a bases-loaded walk to tie the score, to which Tony Delgado added an RBI single, and Stalker a sac fly to put the Coons up 3-1. Garrett, nothing more than an *** with a cap, continued his rancid effort, allowed singles to Dan March and Carlos de Santiago to concede a run in the second, and also hit Brad Gore and walked Gus Gasso before Josh Wool grounded out to keep three men aboard in a 3-2 game. It also started to rain…

In the rain, the Coons in the bottom 2nd put an even more crooked number on Morgan Shepherd. Garrett hit a leadoff single, which was never a good sign for the opposing pitcher, and Cookie also reached base, but was then forced out by Spencer again. Walter’s RBI double, Nunley’s RBI single, and Alfaro’s second sac fly of the game ran the score to 6-2, and Tim Stalker hit a 2-out RBI single to right to get to 7-2 before Borg grounded out. Garrett kept failing nevertheless on the mound, walked Velez leading off the third – his fifth free pass in the game – and was lucky that Brad Tesch’s fast bouncer was converted into two by Jarod Spencer. At the plate, slugging Travis hit another leadoff single in the bottom 3rd, which was the curtain call for Shepherd, finally. Gary Ledford replaced the fallen starter, got through the top of the order in orderly fashion, then hit a leadoff single off Garrett in the top 4th… ***hat Garrett walked Tadlock on four pitches, Gore on five, then allowed a single up the middle to Gus Gasso. Ledford scored, Tadlock tried to, but was thrown out by Borg at home plate. It was still the end for Garrett, who in 3.2 innings had allowed four hits and SEVEN walks. Kipple replaced him and got Wool to ground out, ending the inning with a 7-3 score, but then allowed two runs on Jon Berntson’s pinch-hit double in the fifth inning after putting Tesch and Dan March on base with a single and walk, respectively. As Coons pitching continued to melt, the Loggers had the tying runs on the corners against Mike Rehbock in the sixth, but Velez and Tesch both struck out against the lefty, and the Coons maintained a tenuous 7-5 lead.

Bottom 6th, Calderon in for Milwaukee again, but the Coons were on him right away with Shane Walter’s leadoff double and Nunley’s subsequent single to left, and now had themselves runners on the corners with no outs. They would not find another base hit, but at least Delgado’s groundout scored Walter from third after Alfaro’s groundout had kept him put. The Loggers put two on base against Joe Moore in the seventh, but stranded them, and Vince D had a scoreless eighth to move things along, and Brett Lillis would be out for the third straight day in the top of the ninth inning, but managed to retire the Loggers on only seven pitches to run our winning streak to as many games. 8-5 Coons. Carmona 2-5; Walter 3-4, BB, 2 2B, RBI; Nunley 3-5, RBI; Rehbock 1.1 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 3 K;

David Kipple got the W despite allowing two runs. We would field an almost completely different lineup in the second leg of the double header. It’s not like we’re playing for anything. F.e. Matt Nunley was not in the lineup, either, but since he has so far appeared in every game this season, you can bet on him pinch-hitting later on.

Game 2
MIL: SS Tadlock – CF W. Trevino – RF Gore – 1B Gasso – 3B A. Velez – C Padilla – LF Tesch – 2B March – P Villalobos
POR: SS Stalker – 2B Claros – LF Graves – RF Alfaro – C Tovias – CF Santos – 1B Cardona – 3B Bullock – P Mendez

Mendez debuted with a flash, striking out five in the first two innings while allowing two inconsequential singles and also knocked a single himself in his first plate appearance in the majors, although that single also proved inconsequential. Both teams had two hits apiece in the first three innings, but didn’t score. The Loggers started to figure him out, however, and Mendez got no whiffs the second time through the order, which was good for 4.2 innings for him, although Milwaukee also didn’t get any hits or walks. Velez was drilled in the fourth; March reached on Claros’ error in the fifth, but the game remained scoreless. Brad Tesch annoyed the Critters in the bottom 6th, snaring gappers by both Alfaro and Tovias with Zach Graves on first base, where he would remain without advancing, and Tesch would also draw the first walk off Mendez, although that didn’t happen until with two down in the seventh of a scoreless game. Mendez also walked PH Carlos de Santiago after Tesch stole second base, but the Loggers didn’t bat for their pitcher Villalobos with two outs. Mendez remained in the game, and of course served up a hanger for an RBI single knocked into leftfield, the first tally in the game. Tadlock grounded out to short, and Mendez was hit for in the bottom 7th. With Bullock on first and two down, Nunley came out to maintain his flawless appearance record this season, but flew out to Willie Trevino in deep center. Top 8th, Kevin Surginer managed to load the bases on five pitches, allowing singles to Trevino and Gore before hitting PH Josh Wool. Brotman replaced Surginer with two outs, Alberto Velez’ sac fly having grown the lead to 2-0, and only made it worse with an RBI single allowed to PH Myles Beckwith, then walking Tim Prince on four pitches. The Coons were out of qualified pitching and had to resort to Juan Barzaga with the bases loaded, two outs, and Jon Berntson pinch-hitting for Villalobos. Bernston knocked in two, just as he had in the first game of the double header, with a single to center, and the Raccoons’ winning streak was quite definitely over by now. Barzaga struck out three in the ninth; the only guy he didn’t strike out was Brad Gore, who homered. 6-0 Loggers. Alfaro 2-4; Mendez 7.0 IP, 3 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 5 K, L (0-1) and 1-1;

Oh well, you can’t win forever, huh? We won seven straight here.

Game 4
MIL: SS Tadlock – CF W. Trevino – RF Gore – 1B Gasso – C Wool – 3B Velez – LF de Santiago – 2B March – P Foreman
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – C Tovias – CF Santos – SS Bullock – P Chavez

The Loggers, who took a 1-0 lead on the second following their catcher’s 1-out triple and Velez’ run-scoring groundout, tried their luck with Michael Foreman on two days’ rest. Foreman had thrown only 63 pitches against the Elks in a defeat on Sunday, but it was obviously a dicey attempt by them. Nevertheless, Foreman retired eight in a row before walking Chavez for some weird reason. Spencer’s leadoff single in the bottom 4th was the Coons’ first base hit, and Nunley’s single to center put runners on the corners. Alfaro tied the game with a groundout to first base, and tied the game would stay for a bit after that. Chavez doubled in the bottom 5th, but with two outs, and Cookie tried to complete the groundout bingo, rolling out to a different infielder every time he came up, so Chavez was left on base. Spencer hit another leadoff single his next time up, which was to begin the bottom of the sixth. Walter flew out to right (putting at 0-3 with a 12-game hitting streak on the line), but Nunley got a bit more of Foreman’s offerings and homered to right, his 10th shot of the season. It was also the last one against Foreman for now, as the Loggers made the move to the pen immediately.

Chavez lasted seven innings, conceding only two base hits, but was hit for in the bottom 7th with Daniel Bullock on first base after a single and one out. Graves chopped the ball back to reliever Jerry Counts for a double play. The Critters now had to collect six outs without Brett Lillis in a 3-1 game. Vince D entered the fray first, issued a leadoff walk to Kevin Jaeger, who was then forced out by Tadlock’s grounder to short. Trevino struck out, as did Brad Gore… except that Tovias lost the ball, kicked it up the third base line, and Gore reached first base on the uncaught third strike. The tying runs were aboard for Gasso, but he was a right-hander, so Vince D (who had faced the left-handed Gore because of Gasso here, for if a left-hander lost Gore, we’d have to go back to a righty immediately) remained in the game, only to serve up an RBI double to center on the first pitch. Runners on second and third, lefty Josh Wool up, the Coons tapped Kipple, who got the K and was also the pitcher of choice for the ninth inning (and had been beforehand, anyway). Bottom 8th, Mike Kress walked Walter, which would end his hitting streak unless we’d get to extras, but that would require Kipple to blow the lead, so **** that hitting streak, daddy wants to go home for today! Kipple faced three pinch-hitters, of whom Myles Beckwith singled with one out. Tyler Stewart forced him out, but remained on first base, and the Loggers sent Jon Berntson to bat in the #9 hole. He had a million pinch-hit RBI in the series, and was a right-hander, so Kipple was outta here. Joe Moore faced Berntson, walked him, and allowed game-tying single to Tadlock. Trevino flew out to center while I was filling the blunderbuss with lead shot.

Top 10th, Adam Cowen and Tony Delgado entered in a double switch and managed to give the Loggers a lead in real style. Cowen allowed a single to Gore, then walked Gasso and Prince before Delgado lost a pitch to Beckwith for a passed ball that allowed Gore to scamper for home. Beckwith popped out, Stewart lined out to Spencer. The Critters wouldn’t even manage to get Shane Walter back to the plate in the bottom 10th, which would have required one of Delgado, Cookie, or Spencer to get on against left-hander Tim Dunkin. 4-3 Loggers. Spencer 2-5; Nunley 2-4, HR, 2 RBI; Chavez 7.0 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 4 K and 1-1, BB;

Nope, still terrible! That’s also back-to-back games where the starter went seven, allowed only one run, and still didn’t get the win.

Game 5
MIL: SS Tadlock – CF W. Trevino – RF Gore – 1B Gasso – C Wool – 3B A. Velez – LF Tesch – 2B March – P Prevost
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – C Tovias – RF Graves – SS Stalker – CF Borg – P McKendrick

Ian Prevost went on short rest and was spotted a 1-0 lead by the third inning when McKendrick got taken plenty deep by very, very light-hitting Willie Trevino. It was the 24-year-old Trevino’s third career homer in 200 plate appearances. McKendrick allowed two base hits through three innings, while Prevost was on five hits allowed by the bottom 3rd, with the Coons having the bases loaded with one out after proper singles by Borg and Spencer, and Prevost turning McKendrick’s in-between bunt into another single. Shane Walter popped out, but Nunley worked a bases-loaded walk in a full count to tie the game, and Tovias’ single into left center plated two for a 3-1 lead. Graves stranded two, flying out to Gore, but McKendrick wouldn’t reap any benefits from the 3-1 lead, leaving the game after four innings with an apparent injury.

Will West would log five outs against the Loggers before allowing a single to Gus Gasso, bringing Billy Brotman into the game against the left-handed bottom of the order. Wool flew to right, Graves dropped the ball, and the tying runs reached scoring position. Jarod Spencer’s mighty stretch on Alberto Velez’ liner ended the inning, just barely. Brotman also retired the Loggers in order in the seventh, whiffing Tesch and Prevost. The latter remained in the game into the eighth. Even after Walter’s 1-out bloop single there, he was still under 90 pitches despite allowing nine hits against the Coons. Matt Nunley would get the tenth hit, a 380-footer around the inside of the right foul pole, running the score to 5-1. For Portland, Surginer and Rehbock held down the Loggers in the last two innings, putting this odd 5-game set away with a 3-2 series win. 5-1 Raccoons! Spencer 2-4; Nunley 2-3, BB, HR, 3 RBI; Tovias 2-4, 2 RBI; McKendrick 4.0 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 0 K and 1-1; West 1.2 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K, W (3-1);

Regardless our exploits of the Loggers, however, mathematical elimination from playoff contention (while trivial) could occur any day now, as the Coons were 15 1/2 back with 16 to play for the division-leading Crusaders.

Raccoons (68-79) @ Condors (76-70) – September 15-17, 2023

Five games out in the South, the Condors still entertained vaguely plausible playoff chances with 16 games left on their schedule, but any attempt at the postseason had to come over the Coons’ thoroughly dead bodies. Sweep or nothing! The season series was level at three, and the Coons had lost it the last two seasons, 4-5 both times. The Condors were ninth in runs scored, but had the best rotation in the league and were conceding the third-fewest runs.

Projected matchups:
Matt Huf (4-9, 4.54 ERA) vs. Luis Flores (10-9, 3.22 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (10-9, 3.88 ERA) vs. Jeremy Waite (16-3, 2.53 ERA)
Travis Garrett (5-6, 3.27 ERA) vs. Andrew Gudeman (13-9, 4.19 ERA)

Flores would be the lone southpaw for the Coons to face this week.

Tijuana was missing two regulars from the lineup in Matt Jamieson and Andy McNeal, neither of which would be back for potential playoffs.

Game 1
POR: SS Stalker – 2B Spencer – RF Alfaro – 3B Nunley – LF Newman – C Delgado – CF Santos – 1B Cardona – P Huf
TIJ: SS B. Rojas – 1B Gershkovich – LF O. Larios – 3B M. Matias – C Sanford – RF Boggs – CF Hatley – 2B B. Torres – P L. Flores

Offense was slow early on, both teams once stranding a pair in the first three innings. The Critters had Santos and Stalker in scoring position in the third inning, but Jarod Spencer lined out to Bob Rojas to keep them on. The scoreboard only lit up in the bottom of the fourth inning, Pat Sanford hitting a 2-out solo jack off Huf. The Critters were held to two hits through five innings, but Huf opened the sixth with a soft single to left center. Omar Larios mishandled the ball into an extra base, but that didn’t matter anymore once Tim Stalker walked. Spencer ripped a ball up the leftfield line for a game-tying RBI double, and runners remained in scoring position with nobody out for the middle of the order. The Condors wanted no part of Alfaro with first base open, but still fell behind on Nunley’s sac fly to right. Will Newman hit into a double play just as it started to rain. Huf retired the first two batters in the bottom 6th, but then the rain got too heavy and a 1-hour delay ensued. Rehbock replaced him afterwards, getting a groundout from Larios to end the inning, with the Coons up 2-1 through six.

Bottom 7th, Hector Morales was in the game, because we were still kinda short on pitching, somehow. Mike Matias grounded out, but Sanford, who was mostly all of the Condors’ offense, doubled to left. Robby Boggs then grounded to the left side of the mound, Nunley had to hurry, but mishandled the ball and was charged a hard-luck error. Boggs was however thrown out trying to steal second base by Delgado, with Sanford still on third and now two outs to PH Francisco Ordaz, whose single to left on the very next pitch tied the score at two. Bobby Torres made the third out, while in the bottom 8th Kevin Surginer did not get a strike past anybody, walked a pair, balked them into scoring position, and then Nunley handled Mike Matias’ grounder for the third out to keep the contest even. Scoreless efforts by ex-Coon Joel Davis and Will West moved the game into extra innings, where the Raccoons continued to be present, but not a threat. West remained in for the bottom 10th and lost the game on four singles by Eric Stephenson, Bob Rojas, Mike Gershkovich, and Mike Matias. 3-2 Condors. Santos 2-4; Huf 5.2 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 2 K and 1-2;

Not only were we finally eliminated from the playoffs, but by Saturday there were some news about Chris McKendrick (9-7, 3.29 ERA), though we didn’t like them. The Druid reported that McKendrick had a damaged elbow ligament and needed reconstruction surgery and would probably miss the entire 2024 season. So there’s that.

(sighs)

Game 2
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – C Tovias – RF Graves – SS Stalker – CF Borg – P Gutierrez
TIJ: SS B. Rojas – 1B Gershkovich – LF O. Larios – 3B M. Matias – C Sanford – RF Boggs – CF Hatley – 2B B. Torres – P Waite

Cookie reached on an error, stole second base, and scored on Spencer’s single to give the Coons an instant 1-0 lead that Rico Gutierrez even more instantaneously blew in the bottom of the inning with Bob Rojas’ leadoff jack. Worse yet, Gershkovich singled hard to left, and Mike Matias hit a 2-piece to put the Condors in front, 3-1. Two innings later, Gutierrez issued a walk to Gershkovich and then served up a bomb to Omar Larios, only falling further behind. Gutierrez would drag himself through five innings without any sparkle and without any support by his team; that first-inning RBI single by Spencer was the Coons’ only hit against POTY candidate Jeremy Waite through five innings… Spencer singled again with two outs in the sixth, but Walter grounded out, ending that inning, too, and while the Coons tried to get long relief from Juan Bazinga or whatever his name was, all seemed dandy for the Condors through seven innings, until Jeremy Waite mysteriously didn’t re-appear for the eighth. Apparently, he had been removed with an injury. Against left-hander Jeff Little in the top of the eighth, the Coons got singles from Stalker and Borg, only for Raul Claros to hit a smoker into a double play, and Cookie to ground out to third base. Barzaga pitched 2.2 scoreless innings before getting scratched on consecutive 2-out doubles by Matias and Sanford in the bottom 8th, but what did another run matter? The Coons went down in exceptionally hapless fashion. 6-1 Condors. Spencer 2-3, RBI;

Waite was later revealed to suffer from a hamstring strain, so his 17th win of the season was bought at some cost. He would miss the rest of the regular season and probably would also not be able to make a possible CLCS.

Game 3
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – C Tovias – SS Stalker – 1B Cardona – CF Borg – P Garrett
TIJ: SS B. Rojas – 1B Gershkovich – LF O. Larios – 3B M. Matias – C Sanford – RF Boggs – CF Hatley – 2B B. Torres – P Gudeman

The Condors continued to the dismantlement of the Raccoons in seamless fashion with two singles to begin their efforts in the bottom 1st, a soft one to right by Bob Rojas, then a hard one to center by Gershkovich, and following Omar Larios’ regrettable strikeout found a 3-run homer in Mike Matias’ bat. Not enough, Sanford also powered up to go back-to-back with the third baseman, putting Tijuana 4-0 in front after just one inning. Sweep or nothing, huh? Omar Alfaro hit a leadoff single in the second inning, but for some reason turned first base and was thrown out at second by Robby Boggs. Tovias walked, but Stalker hit into a double play, and so it went… “Tragic” Travis meanwhile, a week and change removed from a 14 K game, continued to craft his true masterpiece, drilling Gudeman in the bottom 2nd and loading the bases with a single and walk before Matias somehow made the third out with the bases stuffed. Sanford got drilled leading off the bottom 3rd, advanced on a wild pitch, and after several Condors refused to hold still and instead made outs to Nunley rather than walk, Garrett finally got Bobby Torres to draw a free pass with two outs, bringing up the pitcher, with Gudeman singling hard to center, too hard actually for Sanford to have a chance at scoring. Bob Rojas – marvelously – struck out.

At which point at least Matt Nunley remembered that they, too, could score runs, theoretically. He whammied a 2-piece over the rightfield fence, his 12th homer on the season and the third this week, to cut the Condors’ advantage in half in the fourth inning. ****head Garrett responded by walking Gershkovich AND Larios to begin the bottom 4th, and was then removed from the game so he could be beaten to death by the coaching staff out of sight. Joe Moore replaced him, and easily derailed the game with another deranged performance. Surrendering a bases-loading single to Mike Matias on his first pitch, he then drilled poor Pat Sanford as well, pushing in the Condors’ fifth run. Boggs’ sac fly and a 2-out single by Torres also plated runs, running the tally to 7-2. There was only one way to go from there, really, as the Coons again sought innings mostly from the trash can gang at the shallow end of the pen. Adam Cowen put two aboard in the seventh, and Billy Brotman couldn’t fool the lefty Larios, who smacked a 2-run single to center to add to the Condors’ run total. The Coons got another base hit in the eighth inning – rousing success! – with a leadoff single by pinch-hitting Daniel Bullock, although the hardly warm body of Manuel Cardona instantly hit into a double play afterwards. 9-2 Condors. Bullock (PH) 1-1;

In other news

September 11 – An oblique strain ends the season of SAL OF/1B Abel Mora (.296, 7 HR, 44 RBI).
September 12 – The Scorpions seal up the FL West with a 7-4 win over the Wolves behind Sam McMullen (17-6, 3.21 ERA), locking themselves into the playoffs for a Federal League-record 12th time. It is also the fifth straight year that they won the West.
September 13 – SFW RF Justin Quinn (.310, 11 HR, 65 RBI) tears up the Stars for six hits in an 18-4 Warriors win. Quinn falls a homer short of the cycle, including a triple and two doubles in his effort, and drives in three. It’s the Warriors’ first 6-hit game in 28 years, and the second consecutive 6-hit effort against the Stars after DEN Mario Rocha’s last May. In the same game, SFW 1B Dan Culpepper (.254, 15 HR, 61 RBI) does a significant part of the damage, plating seven runs with two walks and two homers.
September 14 – RIC SP Dan Lambert (12-8, 3.18 ERA) is not only out for the season with a ruptured disc, but also highly questionable for Opening Day next year.
September 14 – The Stars walk off on the Warriors in ten innings, 6-5, when SFW Ken Gautney (5-11, 3.93 ERA, 33 SV) plates Dallas’ Ryan Collins (.239, 0 HR, 4 RBI) from third base with a wild pitch.
September 16 – The pinch-hit, 10th-inning walkoff single by DAL INF Raul Maldonado (.310, 1 HR, 64 RBI) produces the only run in the Stars’ 1-0 win over the Rebels.
September 17 – The Capitals beat the Scorpions, 4-2, despite having only two base hits to their 11. Two walks, RF/LF/1B Matt Hamilton’s (.315, 13 HR, 54 RBI) RBI single, and SS Tom McWhorter (.259, 23 HR, 85 RBI) going deep for three do the trick for the Capitals in the fourth inning.

Complaints and stuff

Matt Nunley reached 70 RBI on Sunday, which was a magnificent moment for the team. I will admit, there was a point earlier in the season where I doubted that either Walter or Nunley could even make it to 60. And then they picked up the pace in August and September and now we have a real raptor in the lineup in Matt Nunley and his astounding pile of 70 RBI in the middle of September!

We are truly blessed.

McKendrick’s injury makes signing a decent starting pitcher this winter even more imperative, since “Tragic” Travis once again demonstrated that he can’t be worked with… twice this week. Juan Mendez remains in the rotation for the last two weeks, and he probably would have anyway as we might have gone to a 6-man rotation to give everybody two more reps. Well, it wasn’t meant to be…

Fun Fact: With our successful Loggers series this week we have taken the season series, 11-7. It has now been ten years that the Loggers won the season series against the Raccoons.

The Loggers’ 11-7 triumph in 2013 marks their ONLY season series win over Portland since the Coons’ Decade of Darkness (1997-2006) ended. Three times the season series ended in a 9-9 tie, including twice since ’13. Overall we have a .529 clip all time against them, the best mark against any CL team for the Raccoons, followed by the Thunder at .522.

[Westheim]

The Raccoons were three wins away from their 3,900th regular season victory ever. The competition would be stiff however, consisting of a pair of teams in the thick of the playoff races in the Continental League.

Raccoons (68-82) vs. Aces (84-65) – September 19-21, 2023

The Aces were on a bit of a winning streak – they had not lost a game since the first day of the month, a 3-2 defeat against the Falcons, and since then had won 14 games in a row. They were also first in the South, three games ahead of the Knights on Tuesday morning, and they were also first in runs scored in the Continental League. In terms of runs allowed, they were in fourth place, with a healthy +114 run differential. The season series so far was even, three wins for each of the two crews.

Projected matchups:
Jesus Chavez (10-13, 3.59 ERA) vs. Chris Wickham (15-6, 2.79 ERA)
Matt Huf (4-9, 4.40 ERA) vs. Jason Clements (12-14, 4.78 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (10-10, 4.02 ERA) vs. Brian Leser (8-10, 3.28 ERA)

Wickham would lead off the series as the Gamblers’ sole left-handed starter, with two righties following afterwards.

Game 1
LVA: LF Serrano – 3B J. Navarro – CF A. Martinez – 1B A. Young – RF D. Brown – SS A. Medina – C Schoeppen – 2B Burrier – P Wickham
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – C Tovias – SS Stalker – CF Borg – P Chavez

The Aces burst right out the box, putting two on Chavez in the opening inning, although in all fairness it could have been a lot worse considering Danny Serrano doubled on the first pitch, Chavez lost Jose Navarro on balls, and Armando Martinez filled the bags with a bloop single to right. That brought up Adam Young though, the career loser / used band-aid on the Aces’ roster, and he popped out to second base. Dan Brown singled in two, but Andres Medina struck out. Hitting Casimiro Schoeppen to reload the bases, Chavez got Cy Burrier to ground out to Shane Walter, ending that atrocious inning. By contrast, the Coons sent up the minimum in the first three innings. Jarod Spencer hit a single, but Walter found his way into a double play; the Critters got onto the board the following inning, though, Cookie hitting a leadoff double up the rightfield line and scoring on Matt Nunley’s single up the middle. The Aces had, safe for another Serrano double, let go of Chavez in the interim, and it would cost them their lead by the bottom of the fifth. Tovias hit a deep drive in the inning, had it caught by Brown, but Tim Stalker found the gap a bit to the left of Brown after that, ended up with a 1-out triple, and was plated on Greg Borg’s flyout to left, knotting the score at two. The Aces had fallen entirely idle in the middle innings, but sometimes offense wouldn’t come from the lineup, it would come from the pitchers. Wickham hit a clean single on a lazy pitch to lead off the seventh, and advanced on a bunt and a groundout. With the runner on third base and two outs, Chavez managed to balk in the run to fall behind 3-2, and was quietly disposed of after Martinez flew out to Borg. However, stupidity was a game for two; Wickham would also balk in the bottom of the inning, albeit that only moved Tim Stalker to second base with Borg at the plate and two outs, so you could be excused for thinking that there was no danger brewing. But even an utterly blind hen would occasionally pick something edible, Borg rolled a single into leftfield on a 3-2 pitch, and Stalker scored to tie the game again. Wickham was removed, replaced by Franklin Alvarado, and the right-hander coughed up a single to pinch-hitting Will Newman (moving Borg to third) and then an infield single to Cookie which Adam Young failed to play in time, and Borg scored to put the Coons ahead. While Kipple and Surginer held on to the 4-3 lead for the Critters in the top 8th, Elias Tovias’ crushed 3-piece in the bottom 8th, still off Alvarado, was likely to end the Aces’ winning streak. Mike Rehbock sealed the deal in style in the ninth, striking out Burrier, Ron Raynor, and Serrano in order. 7-3 Coons! Carmona 2-4, 2B, RBI; Spencer 2-4; Newman (PH) 1-1; Chavez 7.0 IP, 6 H, 3 R, 3 ER, 2 BB, 7 K, W (11-13);

The team overall might be crummy, but they sure know how to get noticed. We were all over the late news and were dissected by all the sports talk bobbleheads the next day for ending the Aces’ 14-game, 18-day streak.

The Aces were skipping Jason Clements, sending Brian Leser into the middle game instead.

Game 2
LVA: LF Serrano – 3B J. Navarro – CF A. Martinez – 1B A. Young – RF D. Brown – SS A. Medina – C Schoeppen – 2B Moroyoqui – P Leser
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – C Tovias – CF Santos – SS Bullock – P Huf

Jose Navarro jacked the Aces into the lead in the first inning, but they were held to the single run despite putting another two men on right away with Martinez’ double to center and Young drawing a walk. A strikeout to Brown and Medina’s groundout to second base ended the inning. The Coons didn’t take long to come back, though, and again a pitcher had a paw in runs scoring. Elias Tovias doubled off the wall in the bottom 2nd, and was still on second base with two outs. Huf singled to left, with Tovias scoring. A fielding gaffe by Serrano allowed Huf to take second base, from where Cookie scored him with another single, giving the Critters the lead. Omar Alfaro would up the score to 3-1 the next inning, homering mighty deep to right center.

But you could almost bet on it: at some point our battery would manage to cock up a run or two or seven. The time arrived in the fifth inning after Jesus Moroyoqui’s leadoff double. The runner was on third base with one out when Serrano lined out to Daniel Bullock, only for Tovias to lose a pitch to Navarro and Moroyoqui scoring on the passed ball, narrowing the gap to 3-2, but with the Coons offense this time lying entirely dead in the middle innings, it was on the Aces to maybe rise again. Schoeppen legged out an infield single leading off the seventh, although Raul Claros looked pretty bad on that one. Allen Retzer’s pinch-hit double in the #8 spot put the tying and go-ahead runs in scoring position with no outs. The Aces let Leser bat, he struck out, and after that Vince D replaced Huf. We were certainly hoping for a strikeout here, but we wouldn’t get it. Serrano cracked a pitch into rightfield for an RBI single, although that was it for the Aces. Retzer remained stranded with a K to Navarro and Martinez’ fly to Alfaro. The game was barely tied when fall struck and the game went into a rain delay of almost two hours. The Coons remained harmless even after the weather, while the Aces loaded the bags in the ninth without the benefit of a base hit. Schoeppen walked against Joe Moore; Josh Baker walked against Billy Brotman; with the beauty of it all being that these were players of matching handedness… Nunley bungled a pickup on Navarro’s 2-out grounder for an error, after which Surginer came on and got a fly to Alfaro from Martinez, stranding all the runners. The bottom of the ninth was another wonderful example of baseball. Tovias led off with a single to right against right-hander Harry Merwin. Jarod Spencer took over for Tovias as the winning run, while Borg was asked to bunt, which he did, badly. Merwin got the force at second base, but Bullock then singled to right, sending the winning run to third base. Tony Delgado batted for Surginer, poked at a 3-0 ball, and grounded to short. My heart stopped, although Andres Medina was unsure about his double play chances and instead fired home. However, the slight hesitation before abandoning the double play attempt gave Greg Borg a few extra steps, and he beat the throw, walking off the Critters. 4-3 Furballs! Walter 2-4, 2B; Tovias 2-4, 2B; Bullock 2-4;

The Aces, desperate for a W, would send Miguel Morales (19-7, 3.25 ERA) into the Thursday contest. Rico Gutierrez would have the chance to win #3,900.

Game 3
LVA: SS A. Medina – 1B A. Young – RF D. Brown – LF Raynor – 3B J. Navarro – C Schoeppen – CF Serrano – 2B Moroyoqui – P M. Morales
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – SS Stalker – CF Santos – C Jones – P Gutierrez

Again, the Aces scored in the first inning, one run following Medina’s double, Young’s single, and Brown’s run-scoring groundout. Again, they wouldn’t hold on to their lead for long. Cookie was aboard both of his first two times at the plate, but was caught stealing the first time around, which robbed the Coons of a chance to score in the bottom 1st. In the bottom 3rd, Cookie walked with two outs, Raul Claros got nicked, and then Shane Walter’s fly near the leftfield line eluded Ron Raynor for a 2-run double. Nunley walked, but Alfaro struck out, keeping the score at 2-1. Neither would Gutierrez hold on to this lead – Casimiro Schoeppen took him deep right in the fourth inning, tying the score at two.

Portland amounted to three hits through five innings, and the Aces kept poking at Gutierrez, who scattered seven hits through six innings and another run as well, allowing a 1-out double to Brown and a 2-out RBI single to Navarro in the sixth, putting the Aces 3-2 ahead, putting Morales in line for his 20th win of the season. Gutierrez lasted seven innings, getting into quite a few 2-strike counts without piling up any number of strikeouts that would excite his GM. The eighth saw the Aces tack on a run charged to Hector Morales, who faced only leadoff man Medina and allowed a single, and Juan Barzaga was no help in keeping the runner aboard, allowing a walk to Brown and a single to Raynor to get Medina around. Medina’s error then put Cookie aboard in the bottom 8th, but Cookie was caught stealing for the second time in the game, this time trying to snatch second base. Instead, Schoeppen snatched him. But: the tying run would be up immediately in the bottom 9th after Nunley’s leadoff single against Harry Merwin, a hard shot into shallow left, and there was some power available to the Coons, even though power bid #1, Omar Alfaro, chopped a ball right back to the mound. His luck was that it was slightly to Merwin’s off side, and he could not play it cleanly, knocking it down when he swiped with the glove, but it still bounced away a few feet. Alfaro legged it out for an infield single, bringing up the winning run with nobody down. Tim Stalker kicked a single to right, loading them up, and after that Elias Tovias batted for Santos. Sadly, Tovias jabbed the ball right at Moroyoqui, who turned a double play. Nunley scored, but the air was out of the Coons now, and Will Newman grounded out when he batted for Isaiah Jones, ending the game. 4-3 Aces. Gutierrez 7.0 IP, 7 H, 3 R, 3 ER, 1 BB, 4 K, L (10-11);

Well, you can’t win them all. But maybe we can win one from the Crusaders on the weekend?

Raccoons (70-83) vs. Crusaders (87-65) – September 22-24, 2023

The Crusaders had won three in a row (only), including whacking the Knights 10-0 on Thursday in a makeup game, and that had been enough to take over the lead in the North midweek. Their strength was opposite to the Aces, as they had allowed the very fewest runs in the CL, and were above average, but not extraordinary in runs scored, ranking fifth. They were second in starters’ and first in bullpen ERA, and they had already claimed the season series, 10-5 in their favor.

Projected matchups:
Travis Garrett (5-7, 3.63 ERA) vs. Ben Jacobson (7-5, 2.94 ERA)
Juan Mendez (0-1, 1.29 ERA) vs. Tim Dunn (10-11, 3.64 ERA)
Jesus Chavez (11-13, 3.60 ERA) vs. Ed Hague (8-5, 3.07 ERA)

This puts up against two southpaws to open the series, plus the right-hander Hague on Sunday, who had pitched a 6-hit shutout against the Thunder on Tuesday.

Game 1
NYC: 1B X. Garcia – 3B Schmit – RF Fullerton – 2B S. Valdez – SS Loya – LF J. Richardson – C McPherson – CF Douglas – P Jacobson
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – RF Alfaro – 3B Nunley – C Tovias – SS Stalker – 1B Cardona – CF Borg – P Garrett

Reaching ever new levels of wickedness, “Tragic” Travis not only held the Crusaders from scoring in the first inning, the first Raccoon to achieve that feat this week, but the Coons also scored first, and plenty. Bottom 2nd, Tim Stalker homered, a solo shot to left-center, and after that the gates of hell opened for the Crusaders. Manuel Cardona hit an infield single with two outs, and Greg Borg was about striking out when Eric McPherson was called up for catcher’s interference, putting a second runner on base. A wild pitch advanced the runners, and then Garrett cracked a single to left to score them both and send himself up 3-0. The following inning, and while the Crusaders were still hitless, the Coons’ Spencer, Nunley, and Tovias all hit singles off Jacobson to stack the bags with one out. Tim Stalker also rammed a single to left, uncatchable for the infielders, upping the score to 4-0 and bringing up Cardona, the wannabe slugger with no homers in 93 AB, with the bags still full. Cardona would remain homerless, but still got the job done, doubling to center to score a pair. Borg was walked intentionally, but Jacobson couldn’t get Garrett removed without allowing another run on a groundout, the seventh run on his ledger, and also the final batter he faced. Left-hander Bryce Neal replaced him, with Cookie flying out to left to end the inning.

Obviously, this was Garrett’s to lose with a 7-0 lead. The Crusaders were not really rallying at this point; they weren’t landing even a base hit until the fifth inning, a McPherson double up the leftfield line that only fell with two outs, and wouldn’t lead to a run with Lance Douglas making the third out to short. By then and courtesy of another 2-run homer by Tovias, the Crusaders were already down by nine, and the Coons kept piling on, with Spencer driving in a run in the fifth, and Cardona hitting a 2-run single in the sixth. The Crusaders only got onto the board against Garrett in the seventh inning, and then they required a Ricky Loya RBI triple over the head of Greg Borg. Loya also scored on John Richardson’s groundout, cutting the gap to 12-2, but that was cosmetics at best. Talking about cosmetics, the Coons had a couple of singles by Spencer and Alfaro in the bottom 7th, Shane Walter walked in Nunley’s spot against Tony Baxter, the right-hander being encroached on with three on right now, and then Baxter was the most recent pitcher to find out that you can’t just throw a curve to Tovias and expect to live to tell about it. Tovias peppered a 1-0 breaking ball (81mph!), a mighty drive to right, and is it? Would it? … GRAAAAAAAAAAAND SLAAAAAAAAAAMMMM!!!!

Garrett allowed a leadoff single in the eighth inning and was removed, with David Kipple (barely…) keeping the run from scoring. The Raccoons would not score in the eighth, ending a 6-inning scoring streak, and the Crusaders were glad for it. Juan Barzaga pitched a quick ninth, whiffing two, to get the game over with. 16-2 Raccoons! Spencer 4-5, BB, RBI; Alfaro 2-5; Tovias 4-5, 2 HR, 6 RBI; Stalker 3-4, HR, 2B, 2 RBI; Cardona 3-4, 2B, 4 RBI; Garrett 7.0 IP, 3 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 8 K, W (6-7) and 2-4, 3 RBI;

By the way, we are still last in runs scored… BUT … only ONE run behind the Elks for 11th place!

Brace for getting shutout for the rest of the weekend. For now, Ed Hague was moved to the middle game on short rest, with Tim Dunn removed from the start for reasons so far unknown.

Meanwhile the Coons brought back Josh Stevenson from the DL to make his presence felt again in centerfield.

Game 2
NYC: 1B X. Garcia – 3B Schmit – RF Fullerton – LF J. Williams – 2B S. Valdez – C Asay – SS Loya – CF Douglas – P Hague
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – C Tovias – SS Stalker – CF Stevenson – P J. Mendez

Four straight 2-out base hits rapped off in the first inning put the Crusaders up 3-0 in a hurry against Mendez, who made his second career start with little luck. At least the Coons were not idle entirely. Cookie got aboard in the bottom 1st and scored when Shane Walter hit a bomb to right, cutting the gap to 3-2. Mendez struggled with control, badly. While not walking anybody in the first three innings, he ran half a dozen 3-ball counts and whiffed only one batter, Xavier Garcia right at the start of the game. Apart from that, he entirely relied on the defense to get him through the innings. That still allowed him to get through four scoreless after spilling three in the opening frame, but he needed 90 pitches to get that far, getting a few more strikeouts along the way as well. Mendez got through six; spilling a 2-out walk to Sergio Valdez in the sixth he’d get to face the right-hander Jason Asay, who grounded out to Nunley to keep the score at 3-2. Joe Moore would pitch a perfect seventh inning before handing over the reins to Mike Rehbock, who got strafed in the eighth. Xavier Garcia corked a fastball for a leadoff jack, and the Crusaders scrabbled another run together with a walk, a single, and a groundout before having to be dug out by Kevin Surginer. It wouldn’t get better in the ninth inning. While the Raccoons showed no ambition to come back, the bullpen showed no ambition to get the game over with silently. Hector Morales allowed a single to Lance Douglas, walked Josh Perkins, balked, and there was still nobody out… The Crusaders were eventually held to a single run on Xavier Garcia’s groundout, but were still up 6-2 now, with the Coons not having scored past the first inning. They also wouldn’t score in the ninth. Although leadoff singles by Tovias and Graves knocked out reliever Jon Ozier quickly, closer Steve Casey wouldn’t allow them another inch, let alone 180 feet. Stevenson popped out, and Jarod Spencer hit into a double play. 6-2 Crusaders. Carmona 2-4; Graves (PH) 1-1;

Worse yet, the Coons lost Raul Claros to an injury on a play in the ninth inning, but the Druid is trying some new herbs in his pipe and is currently not available for conversation or diagnosis. He is not exactly in our sphere as of now.

Game 3
NYC: 1B X. Garcia – 3B Schmit – RF Fullerton – LF J. Williams – 2B S. Valdez – C Asay – SS Loya – CF Douglas – P Dunn
POR: LF Spencer – 2B Walter – RF Alfaro – 3B Nunley – C Tovias – SS Stalker – CF Stevenson – 1B Cardona – P Chavez

There was scoring in the first inning, but this time from the home team only, with Shane Walter hitting his second home run of the series, a solo job to put Chavez 1-0 ahead. Chavez had allowed a pair of 2-out singles in the top 1st to D.J. Fullerton and Jake Williams, but had made it out before the Crusaders had piled on him for anything countable. The Crusaders had two more hits in the second inning, didn’t score, and two more in the fourth inning, when they scored, and nope, Chavez wasn’t exactly fooling anybody. Jake Williams’ 30th double of the season led off the fourth inning and he immediately scored on Valdez’ single to center. Drawing the throw and beating it, Williams allowed Valdez to move into second base, and he would score on a groundout by Asay and Ricky Loya’s sac fly, flipping the score overall in the Crusaders’ favor at 2-1, although the Coons would get back at them in the same inning. Tovias’ 1-out walk was followed by 2-out singles by Stevenson and Cardona in the bottom 4th to load the bases, after which Chavez dropped a ball near the rightfield line for another single and the one that probably annoyed Tim Dunn the most. Tovias scored, Stevenson was sent, but thrown out by Fullerton, ending the inning.

After hitting that game-tying 2-out single off Dunn in the bottom 4th, Chavez almost issued a leadoff walk to Dunn in the top 5th before the opposing pitcher popped out on a 3-1 offering. He would not walk anybody in the game, but would also only get a single strikeout, with nine hits against him in 5.2 innings. Singles by Valdez and Loya kicked him out in the sixth inning, with David Kipple inheriting runners on the corners and two outs with Lance Douglas at the plate. Douglas went down swinging, keeping the game tied. For his troubles, Kipple got into position for the win when Josh Stevenson walloped a solo home run in the bottom of the inning, a good drive out of left-center that put the Coons 3-2 ahead. Unfortunately for Kipple, his fellow left-hander Billy Brotman would immediately get whacked in the seventh inning and single-handedly blew the game. After whiffing Dunn, Garcia and Andy Schmit both singled off him, then embarked on a double steal with Tovias not really making them fear for their lives. Fullerton’s sac fly tied the game, and then Jake Williams grounded to the mound, but instead of getting the third out, Brotman misfired the ball past Cardona, allowing Schmit to score and Williams to get to second base. PH Ivan Flores flew out to pretty deep left to end the inning. Will West’s eighth was scoreless, but in the ninth Brett Lillis got scored on. After not being needed all week long, Lillis was rusty and got whacked as he spilled a walk and two doubles, with D.J. Fullerton driving in an insurance run, spotting Steve Casey to a 2-run lead in the bottom of the ninth inning. The amount of runs for Casey would not matter; Stevenson, Cookie, and Graves went down in order in the inning. 5-3 Crusaders. Walter 2-4, HR, RBI; Stevenson 2-4, HR, RBI;

In other news

September 22 – VAN SP Greg Becker (4-8, 4.64 ERA) is out with a torn back muscle, but should be ready for the next Opening Day.
September 22 – The Pacifics walk off on the Scorpions in the 18th inning, 3-2, on a 2-out double by LAP INF Nick Herman (.281, 6 HR, 42 RBI) lighting up his so-far 0-for-6 day.
September 24 – Another postseason drawing up, another Scorpions steamrolling team falling apart: centerfielder Justin McAllester (.298, 7 HR, 62 RBI) goes on the DL with a torn back muscle.

Complaints and stuff

What is it with torn back muscles these days? Must be that these kids don’t know about a proper breakfast anymore! When I was young, the only breakfast we had was rye shred with ewe’s milk – and I never tore or broke anything! … during physical activity, that is.

Elias Tovias was named Player of the Week! Our rookie catcher batted .400 (8-for-20) with 3 HR and 9 RBI to snatch that trophy. Tovias is also blind enough for 40+ extra base hits barely making him a league average hitter, but right now I can’t complain. Right now I am enjoying this $18,000 investment from the 2017 IFA pool. Also consider that he has put up his countables in fewer than the qualifying amount of plate appearances, so the power is raw.

…unless it is a Beairstoean kind of power, subject to vanishing within the year, which is also the most vowels you can fit in a word of this length.

Only the Titans and Elks left this season! The Crusaders and Loggers will play four to start the final week, which will probably go a good way to decide the division. Similarly, the Aces and Knights play four starting Monday, so the Knights still have it in their own hand to overcome their 3-game deficit. In the FL East, the Capitals are going to face the bottom two in their division in the last week, which combined with their 5 1/2 week should probably be good enough to put the division into wrappers.

Fun Fact: 25 years ago this Monday, on September 19, 1998, Kisho Saito took the loss in a 9-2 rout on the hands of the Atlanta Knights, dropping to 5-14 for the final defeat in his penultimate season.

Saito finished that year 6-14 with a 3.20 ERA, so you get the idea. The Raccoons dropped to 69-79 in that game, not noticeably different from their record right now, and then as well the roster was filled with young players that were surely going to lead the Raccoons back to the playoffs very soon. Stephen Buell for example had a promising .750 OPS and while batting him fifth behind catcher Werner Turner, who led the team with 71 RBI (as many as Nunley has today, and yes, the ’98 Coons finished last in runs scored), was certainly a bit too optimistic, it would only get better from there. And, oh, Clyde Brady, and Chris Parker, and Luke Newton, and Samy Michel, and Mike Crowe …! Mike Crowe especially. His .260 average with six homers in his only season with a qualifying number of plate appearances remained his career highlight. He was essentially the answer to the question who had a good arm and a pulse after Ben O’Morrissey was traded during the previous season.

I will never stop hating O-Mo.

This was Werner Turner’s only season with the Coons, who became a free agent after the season. We had acquired him in a trade from the Warriors, along with Bob Joly, for Gabriel Rodriguez the previous December. While the name Bob Joly has a certain name recognition around this place for no-hitter reasons (once) and sleepless nights (thousands, at least…!), 25 years later nobody even vaguely remembers Rodriguez anymore, a career backup that amounted to fewer than 1,000 career at-bats, hitting .274 with 12 homers across ten years and four teams. But the story loops back to O-Mo, because Rodriguez, who played only 13 games for the Coons before a bad back claimed him, was one of the two players picked up from the Condors in the O-Mo trade in June of ’97. The other was Ralph Ford, the first half of the F&F pitching duo – Farley and Ford – to get aboard during the 1997 downsizing. Randy Farley was acquired later, also from the Condors, in the David Brewer trade, as were, well, Chris Parker and Clyde Brady…

[Westheim]

Baseball is spherical
Often cyclical
Sometimes cynical

One team falls to ashes
As its journey ends
And another team’s begins

Cycle of baseball
Cycle of life
Baseball is life

Raccoons (71-85) vs. Titans (88-68) – September 25-27, 2023

Pressure was square on the Titans for this one. They were wedged between the Crusaders and Loggers, 1 1/2 games out of the playoffs, while their two competitors would play each other – the Titans were damned to win or lose a terminal amount of ground especially as they were up against the Loggers, and not the North-leading Crusaders, on the final weekend. Fourth in runs scored, second in runs allowed, the Titans were certainly a rather complete team, even though injuries had ripped out a few of the pieces, most prominently SP Alan Farrell. The Coons – down in the season series 6-9, a success after winning only a token two from Boston last year – were playing for nothing, really, because there’s no merit medal for fourth or fifth place, except maybe for the rough fun of playing spoilers on the Titans, who, let’s not forget, were still the defending champs.

Projected matchups:
Matt Huf (4-9, 4.39 ERA) vs. Dustin Wingo (4-6, 4.28 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (10-11, 4.01 ERA) vs. John Schneider (0-1, 4.12 ERA)
Travis Garrett (6-7, 3.57 ERA) vs. Alberto Molina (14-14, 3.38 ERA)

Left-right-right. Let’s dive into this.

Raul Claros, 2-for-his-last-24, was not available to begin the final week after suffering an injury on the weekend that the Druid and his pendulums had not figured out yet.

Game 1
BOS: CF Reichardt – C Leonard – 1B Herlihy – LF R. Amador – 2B Kane – RF Cornejo – 3B Corder – SS Hebberd – P Wingo
POR: LF Spencer – 2B Walter – RF Alfaro – 3B Nunley – SS Stalker – C Delgado – 1B Cardona – CF Borg – P Huf

Three straight 2-out runners plated a run for the Titans in the first inning, with Trent Herlihy’s and Mike Kane’s singles framing a walk issued to Roberto Amador, and to be honest, we didn’t expect much better against chronically overwhelmed Matt Huf against a lineup holding seven left-handed hitters than to crash and burn. For the moment, the Coons returned the favor of a first-inning run, although Matt Nunley’s sac fly was unearned. Shane Walter, who scored on the fly to left, had reached on Amador’s error. By then in a light drizzle, Walter reached second base on his own in the third inning, doubling to right-center, and again was plated by Nunley, this time with a 2-out single, putting the Coons 2-1 ahead and the Titans into some problems. The Raccoons though knew how to get rid of leads. They gave it their best shot in the fourth. Errors by Nunley and Cardona put Mike Kane and Gil Cornejo on base with nobody out. The right-hander Adam Corder struck out, and Bill Hebberd’s grounder was good for a force at second base. Huf then dawdled through a full count to the pitcher with two down before surrendering a sharp grounder up the middle after all. Shane Walter’s heroic play not only contained the ball, but also allowed him to get the third out from Wingo, who thus remained behind in the game. Wingo went on to also show a certain lack of vigor against the opposing pitcher with two outs in the bottom 4th, walking Huf with Manuel Cardona on second base, but Jarod Spencer’s grounder was cut off by Kane to end that inning.

Top 5th, Adrian Reichardt took Huf’s first pitch of the inning and his 72nd overall for a liner up the leftfield line. With the ball making its way into the corner and Jarod Spencer having a mediocre arm for an outfielder, Reichardt’s speed would always give him a triple, putting the tying run 90 feet away for the Titans. Leonard flew to left in a full count, Spencer dropped that ball, and the tying scored anyway. Huf then walked Herlihy before he got blasted by Amador, a 430-foot, 3-run homer to dead center. Huf wobbled through the inning to finish with five runs (four earned) conceded in five innings, but Wingo would not get the W either. The earlier drizzle swelled into some full-blown fall shower, interrupting the game with two outs in the bottom of the fifth inning for well over an hour. When play resumed, Wingo tried to get rid of Nunley, but missed and walked him, then was swiftly removed. Jose Fuentes balked Nunley to second, but then got Stalker to ground out. The Titans would score more runs; one in the sixth when Reichardt hit an RBI double off Morales, and another one in the seventh against Rehbock, with Tony Delgado’s throwing error on a pickoff attempt at first base being to blame. The Raccoons would amount to one counterinsurgent run in the bottom of the eighth inning, a weak 2-out groan that saw Stevenson and Tovias reach base as pinch-hitters before Jarod Spencer dipped in a blooper to chase home Stevenson. The Titans pulled the run back in the ninth on Willie Ramos’ pinch-hit RBI double to left-center, that one coming out of Will West’s allowance. 8-3 Titans. Newman (PH) 1-1; Cardona 2-5, 2B; Stevenson (PH) 1-1; Carmona (PH) 1-1;

The Loggers overcame the Crusaders and 20-game winner Mike Rutkowski for a crucial 4-1 win on Monday. This put New York only half a game ahead of Boston and a full game ahead of Milwaukee. This being crunch time, the Titans would skip Schneider on Tuesday and go with Alberto Molina on short rest.

Meanwhile, the Druid diagnosed Claros with a knee sprain, ruling him out for the last five games of the season.

Game 2
BOS: SS Baptiste – LF M. Owen – CF Reichardt – RF Almanza – C Arias – 1B Elder – 3B Corder – 2B Kane – P A. Molina
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – C Tovias – SS Stalker – CF Stevenson – P Gutierrez

In contrast to 24 hours earlier, the Titans this time pulled out every single right-handed bat they could possibly find, with only Kane batting from the left side in the lineup. Because things were invariably going to go badly for Gutierrez, it surprised absolutely nobody that the game started with Tristen Baptiste legging out an infield single. The Titans easily got him in thanks to Matt Owen’s single and then Reichardt’s run-scoring groundout, and if Reichardt hadn’t been caught stealing third base after Chris Almanza’s single, maybe the inning would have gone forever. Baptiste would hit leadoff doubles outright his next two times at the plate, in the third and fifth innings. The first time he was stranded, mainly thanks to Reichardt striking out with him already at third base, but the second time Reichardt hit into a double play with Baptiste and Owen on the corners against Gutierrez, and Baptiste scored. At that point in the top 5th, the run broke a 1-1 tie that the Coons had gotten into in the bottom 4th on Nunley’s RBI single plating Spencer, their only real effort towards home plate by then.

Molina was in trouble in the bottom of the fifth inning. Straight singles by Tovias, Stalker, and Stevenson loaded the bags with Coons, and there was nobody out. Gutierrez didn’t go out of his way in striking out, but that was at least no triple play. Cookie tied the game with a groundout to Jay Elder, but that was unfortunately all the Coons had in them; Spencer flew out to Reichardt in centerfield. Gutierrez lasted six and would be stuck with the no-decision when the Coons got Nunley aboard in the bottom 6th, but not beyond first base his single merited him. Kevin Surginer did the seventh against the bottom of the order, and he would wind up in the lead afterwards, with Tim Stalker singling to left in the bottom 7th, stealing second base, and coming home on Stevenson’s double past Almanza, hit on Molina’s 0-2 offering. Three groundouts by Graves, Cookie, and Spencer stranded Stevenson on third base, though, and Devereaux put two aboard in the top of the eighth. Reichardt singled with one out, Alex Arias walked with two outs, and when left-hander Willie Ramos batted for Jay Elder, David Kipple was sent in and reaped a strikeout to escape the jam.

Molina was still going in the bottom 8th, having thrown only about 80 pitches, but also having allowed ten base knocks already. Nunley’s single to left made it 11, and then Alfaro doubled to center, putting two in scoring position with one down for Tovias. The Titans still wouldn’t remove Molina, not until he had surrendered a first-pitch sac fly to Elias Tovias plus an RBI single to center to Tim Stalker. Javy Salomon then came in and struck out Stevenson. Brett Lillis retired the Titans in order in the ninth, whiffing two. 5-2 Coons. Nunley 3-4, RBI; Tovias 2-3, RBI; Stalker 3-4, RBI; Stevenson 2-4, 2B, RBI;

This was the fifth win of the season for Kevin Surginer, more than Matt Huf had…

Meanwhile the Crusaders rallied from 3-0 down to plate four runs and walk off on John Richardson’s sac fly in the bottom 9th against the Loggers. With that, the division race was reset to the state of Monday morning: Crusaders 1 1/2 up on the Titans, and two up on the Loggers.

Another division battle ended as the Capitals lopped the Miners, 8-0, to seal the FL East and arrange for an FLCS meeting with the stomping Scorpions.

Game 3
BOS: CF Reichardt – C Leonard – 1B Herlihy – LF R. Amador – 2B Kane – RF Cornejo – 3B Corder – SS Hebberd – P Klein
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – C Tovias – CF Stevenson – SS Bullock – P Garrett

The Titans needed this win SO BAD, and they sent another pitcher on short rest, Chris Klein (11-15, 3.58 ERA) having last pitched on Saturday. And given that they sent another plethora of left-handed batters at “Tragic” Travis would certainly play into their cards… the second inning saw a walk to Adam Corder, who moved to second on a groundout, and then Klein batted with two outs. But… Garrett. Klein hit a hard single up the middle, plating Corder with the first run of the game, then scored on Reichardt’s triple to centerfield. Reichardt himself would score on a Spencer error. Doubles by Amador and Corder would add another run in the third inning, staking the Titans to a 4-0 advantage. The Coons cut into that in the fourth with a 2-run homer by Alfaro, who collected Nunley after a leadoff walk, but there was no real helping Garrett, who was washed up after only five innings, throwing 109 pitches and allowing eight hits and five walks. Allowing four runs was almost kind given the lack of mileage. This included him loading the bases in the fifth on Cornejo’s 1-out single, and then walks to Corder and Hebberd. Fine, Travis, that’s your mess. Clear it up yourself. He whiffed Klein, he whiffed Reichardt, escaping with six strikeouts in five frames, but damn heck was the total package awful. Also awful: the Coons’ offense. After the Alfaro homer, they would amount to only two more base hits, and none of them a biggie. The shallow end of the Coons’ pen pitched the four innings that Garrett had no desire to appear in, but the Titans didn’t completely skin them down to the bones. Rehbock and Barzaga were not scored upon; Billy Brotman and Joe Moore combined to give up a run in the ninth inning. The Raccoons did not respond in any way to that, with ex-Coon Ron Thrasher nailing down the save. 5-2 Titans. Stevenson 2-3, BB; Graves (PH) 1-1;

The Titans would thus keep the pace of the Crusaders, who beat the Loggers, 7-3, which all but eliminated the latter club, three games out with four to play. The Loggers would win their do-or-die game on Thursday, 8-2, staying within two of the Crusaders, with the Titans now one game back.

Raccoons (72-87) @ Canadiens (55-104) – September 29-October 1, 2023

The Critters would finish the season with three games against the Vancouver Trainwrecks, by far the worst team in the league this year. We had already clinched the season series, 10-5, on the team that scored the fewest runs in the CL next to ourselves, and was allowing by far the most runs.

Projected matchups:
Juan Mendez (0-2, 2.77 ERA) vs. Bobby Thompson (5-7, 3.97 ERA)
Jesus Chavez (11-13, 3.59 ERA) vs. Emmanuel Castaneda (5-3, 2.77 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (10-11, 3.98 ERA) vs. Bryce Sudar (3-0, 4.11 ERA)

Again, left-right-right. I’ll be watching from the couch, expecting the worst.

Game 1
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – RF Alfaro – 3B Nunley – C Tovias – SS Stalker – 1B Cardona – CF Borg – PP Mendez
VAN: 3B Jon. Morales – RF Houghtaling – LF A. Torres – C Holliman – SS Calfee – CF Coca – 1B Rickard – 2B Crosby – P B. Thompson

A Cookie single and John Calfee’s error on Spencer’s grounder put two Coons on base to begin the game, but Alfaro’s sharp double play grounder and Nunley flying out to left kept them from scoring. Bottom 1st, a similar game developed. Jonathan Morales legged out an infield single, and then Jeremy Houghtaling reached on a Spencer error. The Coons wouldn’t get a double play, and neither would they escape unharmed. Alex Torres flew out to right, moving the lead run to third base, and Ryan Holliman’s groundout scored Morales for the first run of the game. The Coons’ offense remained absent, while the Elks didn’t get another base hit until Morales hit another single, this one actually past the dirt with one out in the fifth inning. Morales would reach third base on a stolen base attempt on which Tovias misfired the ball into centerfield, but Nunley snagging Houghtaling’s liner and Torres rolling out to short kept him aboard and the score 1-0 in the Elks’ favor. The teams had five hits and three errors between them after five frames.

The Coons’ fourth hit was a soft single by Cookie to begin the sixth inning. At 1-0 to Spencer, the Coons called the hit-and-run, Spencer singled through between Bobby Rickard and Adrian Crosby, and Cookie made it to third base handily. Alfaro lined out for the first out of the inning, Morales faking a Nunley on the play, but the Elks’ lead disappeared and reversed itself into a 2-1 Coons advantage on consecutive RBI singles to centerfield by Nunley and Tovias before Stalker got hit by a pitch. Cardona struck out (…), and Greg Borg grounded back to the mound, where Thompson mishandled it and lost any play. Nunley scored, 3-1, and the bases remained loaded for Mendez, who further ripped the gaping wound in the Elks’ stomach open with a single to center. Two runs scored, giving the Coons a 5-spot before Cookie struck out, stranding a pair. That put the game into Mendez’ paws, who was still vying for his first major league win. He made it all the way into the eighth inning, conceding one run along the way when he hit Adrian Crosby leading off the bottom 7th. He walked the leadoff man Torres in the eighth, but Vince D would strand the runner. The rest of the game was Lillis’, who repeated his earlier outing this week and faced only three in the ninth inning, whiffing two of them. 5-2 Coons. Carmona 2-5; Nunley 2-4, RBI; Stalker 2-3; Mendez 7.1 IP, 2 H, 2 R, 1 ER, 5 BB, 3 K, W (1-2) and 1-4, 2 RBI;

This was the 40th save for Lillis this season, his 113th as a Raccoon, and who knows, if he voids his last contract year it might have been his last. For his career, he has 288 saves.

The CL North went to a tie on this Friday. The Crusaders dropped a 3-2 game to the Indians, who got homers from Mike Rucker and Cesar Martinez in the sixth to overcome an early deficit, while the Titans whipped the Loggers, 8-1, behind Julio San Pedro, who won his 17th. The Loggers were now two games out and their only hope was a 3-way tie, which had already worked for them once before…

Game 2
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Alfaro – C Tovias – SS Stalker – CF Stevenson – P Chavez
VAN: 3B Jon. Morales – RF Houghtaling – LF A. Torres – C Holliman – SS Calfee – CF Coca – 1B Ryu – 2B Crosby – P Castaneda

The Coons put a run on the board in the first inning, Nunley singling home Spencer, who had singled himself and then taken second base by force, his 27th stolen base of the year. There was no worrying about Chavez here – he managed to blow the lead quickly and painfully, with Tony Coca hitting a leadoff single in the bottom 2nd, and Emmanuel Castaneda hitting an RBI double to the base of the wall in right-center, that one tying the score at one in the second.

There wasn’t that much offense otherwise – both pitchers had the K’s going. Castaneda whiffed six, Chavez five in the first four innings, and Chavez would pull even at six through five innings, but that was because Matt Nunley accelerated the top 5th with a rally-killing double play. The game remained tied at one through five. Ryan Holliman hit a leadoff single in the bottom of the sixth, but tried to get to second base, and Cookie told him that he didn’t think so. Holliman was tagged out by Stalker and Chavez faced the minimum in the inning, which was also his last as he reached 100 pitches by the end of it. The Elks would instead break through against David Kipple, who served up a pinch-hit homer to Bobby Rickard in the bottom 7th. That solo job put Vancouver up 2-1. The Coons couldn’t get through Nick van Fossen in the eighth inning, then had to face Francisquo Bocanegra in the ninth – the left-hander they had released earlier in the season. Tovias, Stalker, Stevenson went down in order. 2-1 Canadiens. Spencer 2-4, 2B; Chavez 6.0 IP, 7 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 7 K;

The Titans eliminated the Loggers with an 8-5 win, but would break the tie with the Crusaders, who beat the Indians, 4-3, in 11 innings. Robby Soto hit a walkoff single.

Game 3
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – C Tovias – RF Graves – SS Stalker – CF Borg – P Gutierrez
VAN: 1B Jon. Morales – 3B Ryu – LF A. Torres – C Holliman – SS Calfee – RF Houghtaling – CF Luckett – 2B Wise – P Sudar

The Coons put Walter, Nunley, and Tovias on with a walk and two singles in the first inning, but Zach Graves flew out to Elijah Luckett to keep them stranded. Gutierrez responded to getting the nod over Huf for the season finale by bunting into an inning-ending double play in the second, then loading the bags in the bottom 2nd with nobody out via hitting Holliman and walking Calfee and Houghtaling. Productive outs by Luckett, who grounded out to Walter, and a sac fly by Ehren Wise plated two for the Elks in the inning. For the next two innings, the ****ing Elks would both time get an infield single to lead off, first by Morales and then by Houghtaling, and Gutierrez would also issue a walk to deepen the hole. He got out of it in the third, but not in the fourth, where Jonathan Morales rammed a 2-out, 2-run double into the leftfield corner, stretching the Elks’ lead to 4-0. And no, the Raccoons weren’t doing anything.

Except double plays. After Gutierrez’ in the second, the Coons also smacked into double plays in the third (Walter) and fifth (Borg) innings, putting up the minimum the second time through. The team amounted only to three hits at all during Gutierrez’ time around, and when Gutierrez was done after six messy innings, walking as many, the team actually managed to squeeze on Nunley with a walk, but then went down in order again against Bryce Sudar. The bullpen bled for a run in the bottom 7th, then came completely unhinged in the eighth inning. Rehbock faced only one batter, allowing a single to Luckett, and then Barzaga came in, allowed another single to Ehren Wise, then got taken deep by pinch-hitter Omar Saenz for his first homer of the season, and for a score of two slams’ worth. Barzaga also put Morales and Ryu aboard, effectively retiring nobody. When Vince D replaced him just to get the ****ing game over with, he got Torres on a fly to deeeeep left, then threw a run-scoring wild pitch, balked, and walked Holliman. Another wild pitch plated Ryu, and then Calfee doubled, driving in Holliman, which got Devereaux yanked as well. Billy Brotman got the ball and clear hints that mommy wouldn’t pick him up. He promptly allowed an infield single to Cory Briscoe, before whiffing Luckett and Wise to escape a 6-run inning. Dan Moon extinguished the Coons in time in the ninth to give me something to gnash my teeth about all winter. 11-0 Canadiens. Alfaro 1-1;

The division remained knotted on Closing Day, with both the Titans and Crusaders eeking out 1-run wins over their opponents. They would face off on Monday in a tie-breaker.

Ed Hague got routed in a 5-run fourth inning and the Titans would ride that advantage, and actually build on it. Adam Corder’s slam off Hague in the fourth remained the biggest blow and he led the team with his four RBI in Boston’s 10-6 division clincher.

In other news

September 27 – The Miners rally past the Capitals with a 10-run eighth inning, eventually securing a 14-6 win. PIT C/1B J.J. Henley (.262, 22 HR, 67 RBI) goes 4-for-5 with 2 RBI.
September 28 – The Aces beat the Knights, 6-1, to clinch the CL South. This is their fourth playoff appearance, all since 2018.
October 1 – TOP SP Jose Lerma (20-9, 2.36 ERA) closes the door on the Rebels in a 2-0, 1-hit shutout. Richmond’s 1B Luis Moreira (.273, 23 HR, 73 RBI) has their only base hit, a seventh-inning single.

Complaints and stuff

That Lerma shutout on Closing Day was big actually. With the W he pulled even for the FL lead with 20 victories, and he struck out nine to snatch the strikeout crown from Sam McMullen. And he also had the ERA title won … Jose Lerma took home the triple crown!

The most recent player with a triple crown? Why, Jonny Toner of course!

Elias Tovias was named Rookie of the Month in September, batting .281 with 5 HR and 20 RBI. It’s the only time that he won the designation this year, and I don’t know whether he has a shot at the ROTY title given how rough his first half of the season was.

Matt Nunley managed to appear in all the games this season! It would be worth more if he hadn’t put up such a mediocre slash line.

Fun Fact: The Coons and Elks also faced off in a garbage series to end the 1997 season, but that time the Raccoons swept their adversaries to leap out of last place on the final weekend, where the Elks would drop into. Royce Green, Liam Wedemeyer, and Marvin Ingall did the principal damage, game by game, as the Raccoons not only took all three games, but also outscored Vancouver a solid 29-11.

“Weeds” went on to win the CL home run crown with 24 dingers.

INGALL SINGLE.

I’m glad it’s winter, AND I’m already in my burrow.

[Westheim]

2023 ABL PLAYOFFS

Once more, the juggernauting Sacramento Scorpions had dominated the FL West and had stomped into the playoffs with a towering 108-54 record. It was their 12th playoff call, their fifth in a row, and sixth in seven years. It was also their third straight 102+ win season, and yet they had been deleted from the postseason in the FLCS both of the previous two times, by the Blue Sox and Capitals respectively. Again, they were considered the best team in the country, and again they were considered unbeatable. Their run differential was a magical +219, they had led the Federal League in both runs scored and runs allowed, and there was hardly a weakness to make up about them. Well, they didn’t hit for a lot of power. But they also had a .356 team OBP – who needs power strokes when you can just suffocate the opposition. Atop their lineup they had four .300 batters in Trey Rock (.319, 0 HR, 31 RBI), Jason LaCombe (.359, 0 HR, 14 RBI), Pablo Sanchez (.369, 8 HR, 63 RBI), and Doug Stross (.328, 10 HR, 105 RBI). The rest of the lineup was not shabby either, and they only had lost Justin McAllester in centerfield to injury this time around. On the pitching side they had the best rotation with three 15+ game winners, and the best bullpen with a right selection of strikeout pitchers with low-2 ERA’s. What could even go wrong?

Opposite them, the 95-67 Capitals, who had won the same matchup last season facing even steeper odds, had finished third in both runs scored and runs allowed in the FL, and had won the East by eight games. A notable feature of this team was that they had hit the most home runs, with three 20+ dinger hitters in Dave Menth (.278, 26 HR, 67 RBI), Matt Wittner (.260, 20 HR, 94 RBI), and Tom McWhorter (.252, 24 HR, 87 RBI). Also notable was the way their pitching hung heavily to the left side; three of their starters and another four relievers were left-handed hurlers, with southpaw Eric Williams (14-8, 2.87 ERA) being considered their ace. The team leader in victories, Tom McGuire (18-11, 4.42 ERA) was not expected to be in the playoff rotation.

For the second time in four attempts, the Titans had emerged victorious from a tiebreaker scenario in the CL North, squeezing through the Crusaders to get a chance at defending their 2022 title, and giving them back-to-back playoff appearances after 16 seasons on the outside looking in. This team had led the Continental League with a .350 on-base percentage, but a better-than-average rather than convincing .260 batting average and average power saw the team only score the fourth-most runs in the CL. They were second in runs allowed, with a decent rotation and the best pen in the league. Their rotation issue was real: no starter had an ERA better than Julio San Pedro (17-10, 3.47 ERA), and veteran Chris Klein (12-15, 3.68 ERA) had even posted a losing season for the first time since his rookie year in ’17. The rotation had also lost Alan Farrell through injury in the summer, and injuries had also claimed a few bits and pieces like interim 3B Rhett West, who had subbed for an injured veteran Jamie Wilson during the season. Their lineup was balanced, even though top-heavy, between left- and right-handed hitters.

The opposing 92-70 Aces had a noted lack of left-handed pitching to counter that left-handed offense the Titans hoped to put up. Behind starter Chris Wickham (15-8, 3.07 ERA) they had only one left-handed reliever, and this was certainly a weak point to their roster. Add to that an average rotation led by 22-game winner Miguel Morales, who put up a good, but not splendid 3.10 ERA. Their pen was good, but not overwhelming; the Aces hoped and had to hope to win this one via offense. They had scored the most runs in the Continental League during the season, playing a game of getting on base a lot while ranking in the bottom third of teams in terms of home runs. They had ended up second in stolen bases, though, so Titans batteries better be on the watch. The Aces were in the playoffs for only the fourth time, all appearances since 2018, the first of their back-to-back championships after wandering the desert for over 40 years.

Experts favor the Scorpions and Titans to make it to the World Series, but when haven’t the Scorpions be favored, and how often have they actually pulled through?

All of the playoff teams this season are multiple past champions, even if in some cases the last title is decades back. Behind the record champions, the Crusaders anointed seven times, the Titans rank second with five titles. The Scorpions and Capitals both tie for third place with three championships apiece, with Washington not having been triumphant in a quarter century. The Aces tied for seventh with two titles.

Four teams have never won the World Series; of these, the Knights (4 GB), Condors (7 GB), and Buffaloes (11 GB) came reasonably close to the postseason and posted winning records, while the Miners (26 GB) don’t figure to get off the list too soon.

+++

Capitals @ Scorpions … 10-3 … (Capitals lead 1-0) … WAS Luis Leija 4-5, 2B, 2 RBI; WAS Matt Wittner 2-5, 2B, 3 RBI; WAS Tadasu Abe 7.0 IP, 7 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 3 K, W (1-0);

Capitals @ Scorpions … 3-8 … (series tied) … SAC Pablo Sanchez 3-5, 2 RBI; SAC Jorge Castro 3-4, HR, 3 RBI; SAC Brian Petracek 3-3, BB, 2 RBI;
Aces @ Titans … 2-4 … (Titans lead 1-0) … BOS Adrian Reichardt 3-4;

Aces @ Titans … 5-0 … (series tied 1-1) … LVA Casimiro Schoeppen 3-3, BB, RBI; LVA Miguel Morales 6.0 IP, 8 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K, W (1-0);

Scorpions @ Capitals … 4-5 … (Capitals lead 2-1) … SAC Jason LaCombe 2-3, 2 BB, HR, 2B, 2 RBI; WAS Luis Leija 2-3, 2B, 2 RBI; WAS Jason Stone 2-4, HR, RBI; WAS David Lessman (PH) 1-1, RBI;

Scorpions @ Capitals … 4-0 … (series tied 2-2) … SAC Pablo Sanchez 3-5, 2B, RBI; SAC Samuel McMullen 7.2 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 4 BB, 9 K, W (1-0);
Titans @ Aces … 11-5 … (Titans lead 2-1) … BOS Trent Herlihy 4-4, BB, 3 2B, 3 RBI; BOS Matt Owen 3-5, RBI; BOS Mike Kane 2-5, HR, 3 RBI; LVA Ron Raynor 3-4, 2 RBI;

Scorpions @ Capitals … 4-5 … (Capitals lead 3-2) … SAC Pablo Sanchez 3-4, 2 HR, 3 RBI; SAC Doug Stross 2-2, 3 BB, 2B;
Titans @ Aces … 6-4 … (Titans lead 3-1) … BOS Keith Leonard 3-4; BOS Trent Herlihy 2-3, BB, HR, 2 RBI; BOS Mike Kane 3-4, RBI; LVA Danny Serrano 3-4, 2B;

Titans @ Aces … 1-5 … (Titans lead 3-2) … LVA Casimiro Schoeppen 2-3, BB, 2B, RBI; LVA Chris Wickham 6.2 IP, 1 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 3 BB, 3 K, W (1-1) and 1-3;

The Titans fail to end the season in Vegas, amounting to only two hits against Wickham, Mike Daniels, and Noah Bricker.

Capitals @ Scorpions … 1-6 … (series tied 3-3) … SAC Jason LaCombe 1-3, BB, 3 RBI; SAC Ozzie Pereira 8.0 IP, 3 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 3 BB, 6 K, W (2-0);

Capitals @ Scorpions … 4-1 … (Capitals win 4-3) … WAS Eric Williams 8.0 IP, 8 H, 1 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 4 K, W (2-0);
Aces @ Titans … 1-0 … (series tied 3-3) … LVA Miguel Morales 8.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 6 K, W (2-0); BOS Julio San Pedro 7.1 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 4 BB, 4 K;

While “it” has happened again in Sacramento (and at home…!), the Aces stave off elimination and force Game 7 on Corey Curro’s sac fly in the ninth inning off Boston’s Edwin Balandran. The CLCS game sees only seven total base hits and the Titans are 2-hit for the second time in the series.

Aces @ Titans … 4-5 … (Titans win 4-3) … LVA Danny Serrano 2-4, 2B, 2 RBI; BOS Matt Owen 3-3, 3B, RBI;

+++

2023 WORLD SERIES

Not only was this a rematch of last year’s World Series, which the Boston Titans took for their fifth championship so far, but it was already the third time the Capitals encountered the Titans in their seven appearances in the final round; they had previously beaten the Titans in the 1997 World Series, at the tail end of their 1990s dynasty and at the start of the Titans’ late-90s / early-00s domination. As a fun fact, the Capitals in seven World Series appearances had only faced two other CL teams, beating the Condors in 1990 before playing the Raccoons every year from 1991 through 1993, winning the title once, in ’91.

Enjoying home field advantage, the Capitals still had suffered the loss of 1B Matt Hamilton (.303, 14 HR, 57 RBI), who had left the FLCS with knee tendinitis and would not come back this year. The 94-69 Titans had luckily not picked up any more injuries during the CLCS and were as ready to go as they ever would this fall.

Both teams had plenty of left-handed pitching, even more than they probably needed, and both had largely balanced lineups, and no prominent switch-hitters. Both teams had surrendered a roughly even number of runs in the regular season, while the Capitals had scored some 30 more runs than the Titans. Whether this was a big difference given the FL’s tendency to score more in general was uncertain. The truth of it all was that the teams were probably as even as you’d ever find two teams in the World Series, even though the Capitals had a marked power advantage.

Experts were uncertain on the winner of this series and considered the baseball gods would toss one to the Capitals for the first time in almost 30 years.

+++

Titans @ Capitals … 5-1 … (Titans lead 1-0) … BOS Adrian Reichardt 2-3, 2 BB; BOS Matt Owen 2-4, 3 RBI; BOS Alberto Molina 7.1 IP, 8 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 7 K, W (1-2); WAS Victor Hodgers 3-4;

Titans @ Capitals … 6-5 … (Titans lead 2-0) … WAS Victor Hodgers 2-4, 2B, 2 RBI;

Capitals @ Titans … 6-9 … (Titans lead 3-0) … WAS Luis Leija 2-5, HR, 2 RBI; WAS Matt Wittner 3-5, 3B, 2B, RBI; BOS Adrian Reichardt 2-5, 2 RBI; BOS Matt Owen 3-4, 2 2B, RBI; BOS Alex Arias 2-3, BB, 2 2B, 2 RBI;

In a rather rancid pitching display by everybody involved, the Titans break the Capitals in half with a 5-run sixth inning, erasing their lead and keeping the lead alive until the end, patching and botching with six different pitchers behind Chris Klein, who was rocked for five runs in four innings – still better than Eric Williams, though, who took the loss for 5.2 innings of 8-run ball.

Capitals @ Titans … 2-3 … (Titans win 4-0) … WAS Guillermo Obando 3-5, RBI; WAS Matt Barber 4-5, 3 2B; BOS Adam Braun 3-4, 2 2B, 2 RBI; BOS Mike Kane 2-2, BB, 3B;

The Capitals out-hit the Titans, 11-7, but can’t get their men across. In a 2-2 game, Barber’s double in the seventh inning knocks starter Alberto Molina out of the game with two outs in the inning. Jose Fuentes retires Tom McWhorter on a groundball, the only out he logs, but enough for the W in the series clincher; Kane triples off Jose Diaz in the bottom of the inning, then scores on Chris Almanza singling to right, the winning run and final run of the season. Almanza entered the game with Fuentes in a double switch.

This is the third time in league history that both league championship series go seven games, but the World Series is over in four games. The other instances were 1986, with the Blue Sox beat the Stars, and the Knights beat the Canadiens in seven, and then the Blue Sox yielded no ground to the Knights in the World Series; also: *last season*. The Capitals fall to the Titans without winning a single game for the second straight year.

Maybe, just maybe, there are no baseball gods after all?

2023 WORLD SERIES CHAMPIONS
Boston Titans
(6th title)

[Westheim]

Sometimes they’re going, sometimes they’re staying. The offseason for the Portland Raccoons began with the announcement of one guy sticking around, and another one throwing in the towel. The latter was scouting director Nick Ridler, who was giving up on the radar gun and crudely constructed four-liners for scouting reports to focus completely on another project that had been on his mind for decades, a three-volume epic about Ezra Meeker’s 1906 return to the Oregon Trail, in the anapestic metre.

We certainly wished him all the best with that endeavor.

While that left us without a head scout for now (and also no hitting coach, interim coach Mark Smith leaving as well), at least we weren’t left without a closer, as Brett Lillis picked up his option for 2024. In the press conference in which he announced his decision he also expressed his confidence that he would be part of a contending team in his age 35 season.

Well, *someone*’s gotta be confident …

I was not that confident, given that the Mexican Prick continued his hacky-hacky, slashy-slashy tactics on the budget, which dropped slightly from $27M in ’23 to $26.2M in ’24. In terms of ranking, the Raccoons fell from t-14th last year to 17th among all teams, and even in absolute numbers were closing in on the bottom of the table fast, sitting more than three times further away from the top financial powerhouses as they were from the bottom.

The Crusaders, who dumped their manager Juan Gil after losing out in the CL North tie-breaker to the eventual champions, the Boston Titans, would have the biggest budget in 2024, tied with the once-again-embarrassed Scorpions. Both teams could throw around a crisp $40M. The twice-defending champions from Boston ranked third with $35M, the twice-swept pennant winners from Washington were fourth with $34.5M, and the Gold Sox and Rebels tied with $33.5M in fifth place.

At the bottom of the pack ranked the Elks and Thunder, tying for 19th actually with $25M apiece, followed by the Indians ($24.2M), Warriors ($22.8M), Stars ($22.6M), and Wolves ($22.2M). The only CL North team missing still are the Loggers, who would have the eighth-biggest budget at $30.5M.

The average budget for 2024 was $29.1M, the median budget was $28.8M.

+++

After that general overview and a lengthy hand-written note about my performance in the last 12 months in very angry scrawls by the Mexican Prick that I must omit at this point because children are still watching, let’s dive a bit further into the Raccoons’ financial situation in particular, because there are some things that need talking about.

With Lillis picking up his option, the Coons had all of six players with a proper contract to start the 2023-24 offseason, ranked here in terms of the total commitment to them, rounded to full $100k:

$7.5M – Cookie Carmona, signed through 2027 (good move!)
$7.1M – Shane Walter, signed through 2026
$1.9M – Will Newman, includes $1.72M for 2024 and the $160k team buyout for 2025 option
$1.8M – Brett Lillis, contract year
$1.4M – Matt Nunley, signed through 2025
$1.0M+X – Jesus Chavez, it’s complicated*

Chavez originally signed a 4-yr, $3.6M deal when he came out of Cuba prior to the 2021 season. The upcoming season will be the final one where he receives a guaranteed $1M salary. His 2025 salary would be subject to standard league rules for players under team control, but it is so far uncertain (and might be for the entire year) whether he will be arbitration-eligible for 2025 or whether he will not qualify as a super-2 player. His major league experience so far is 1 year and 109 days, placing him reasonably close to the cutoff to prevent a clear guess. You could expect him to make close to $1M in arbitration, but he would make only around $180k if he does not become a super-2 arbitration case.

The list above excludes our arbitration cases this year, some of which we might sign to a deal earlier to prevent arbitration. We have five such players, four pitchers (“Tragic” Travis, Adam Cowen, Vince D, and Cory Dew) and outfielder Frank Santos. None of them are tapped for more than $300k in arbitration by the pundits who claim to know everything.

There are also four free agents that need talking about, including this year’s waiver claim addition Raul Claros, veteran catcher Tony Delgado, starting centerfielder Josh Stevenson, and smoldering wreck Jonny Toner. [Find the full arbitration table before any actions were taken at the bottom of the post]

Let’s start with the elephant in the room right away, which is old #39, four-time Pitcher of the Year Jonny Toner. A once-in-a-generation talent, 32 years old, and increasingly ripped apart by opposing pitching and his own health. His career ERA is 2.61 against a 157-69 record and 2,234 strikeouts, but a once-assured Hall of Fame career has become derailed by three nightmare seasons … well, by his standards. He got tagged for a 3.74 ERA ever since turning 30, and that also includes pitching only 171.2 innings between 2022 and 2023, including a 4-6 record, 4.41 ERA, and 5.6 BB/9 in his disastrous 12 outings in ’23. He made $3M in 2023, and he’s out with elbow ligament reconstruction surgery well into the new season. Given our limited financial prowess (we have roundabout $3M to play with at this point, but have to fill up on coaching, too), we can not reasonably make him an offer at this point.

Not that I don’t want to try him out again. But another go has to start in the new year, after nobody has picked him up and he will drop his asking price. Right now he thinks he’s worth $2.6M in 2024.

Now that the worst is out of the way, let’s talk about what we have, and what we don’t have (and after a general discussion of the general state of the roster we’ll get into some specifics later);

It looks like Jesus Chavez, Rico Gutierrez, and “Tragic” Travis Garrett will play rock-paper-scissors for the Opening Day tap. I would have been after a strong starting pitcher this offseason, but I guess our financial situation forbids an encouraging discussion of this. These three are varying degrees of capable, and all are often serviceable, sometimes excruciating. A team that isn’t going to compete (sorry, Brett) can get along well with all three of them in the rotation. The real problems start behind them, where Matt Huf was been rapturously mind-numbing with 111 walks in 185.2 innings between AAA and the majors. Juan Mendez was merely a stop-gap for the double-header against the Loggers in September, and stuck around when Chris McKendrick went down to injury. McKendrick will miss all or at least the very most of the 2024 season with the same surgery that Toner had, so for now it’s probably best to disregard this poor soul entirely. AAA holds no salvation other than Jonathan Shook, who walked three for every strikeout and posted a 7.99 ERA in his brief time up.

We probably don’t have to worry about the bullpen; there’s enough talent there to make it through a season unharmed, especially with Lillis sticking around. We have numerous options for right- and left-handed pitching, and while his ERA was not that good (4.40), David Kipple’s emergence has been especially encouraging in ’23. He easily leapt past Billy Brotman to #1 on our lefty reliever depth chart (which does not contain Lillis, who is the anointed closer anyway). Brotman’s ERA was better, but his other numbers weren’t – Kipple beat him outright in about every measure. For righties, between Vince D, rule 5 pick Surginer, and the sometimes-sorry Joe Moore, you have a guy for most every situation. And we can easily find a long man between Cowen, West, Barzaga, and what about Cory Dew? He caught himself a bit at the very end of the AAA season, and certainly is making a case for a return to the majors, where he posted a 6.61 ERA in 19 games after returning from injury mid-season.

Behind the dish, Elias Tovias banged 19 homers in his rookie year, which counts for something. The question is whether we need Tony Delgado around. Probably we need a veteran backup still; while we have an interesting option in AAA in 23-year-old Ricky Ortiz (no accent on the I!), his defense is not very good (though Tovias certainly didn’t show much of the advertised catching ability). He did hit .268 with seven homers in 78 AAA games after promotion from Ham Lake, though, so he is definitely on the radar now. Ortiz was the return in the 2022 Joel Davis trade with the Condors.

The infield is where the problems *really* start. Well, we have Matt Nunley at third base – that one is sure. After that it gets tight and porous at the same time. We have two strong defensive shortstops in Tim Stalker and Daniel Bullock, one of which is even hitting okay-ish. Second base is crowded between veteran Shane Walter and still-young Jarod Spencer. Walter played at first base all year, but maybe we would want to try a proper first baseman at some point? Truth be told, I haven’t been not disappointed ever since recycling Al Martin for Adrian Quebell, but come on, every 20 years a team should be able to find a competent first baseman…

There is also the particularity of Raul Claros, who fell into our lap in July. Claros, 30, batted only .271 for the Coons after hitting .340 in the Cyclones’ uniform, but he is something the team does not otherwise have: somebody willing to be patient and draw a ****ing walk. His career OBP is .349, which while not amazing would certainly liven up the top of the order especially with Cookie’s light appearing to have gone out grossly and prematurely. Jarod Spencer, slapper of singles, batted .301 the first time he qualified for the batting title, but he hit only 22 extra-base hits, and drew even fewer (17!) walks in 543 plate appearances. Well, yeah, he’s more than doubled his walks from last year, when he walked eight times in 496 plate appearances.

Add to that Spencer’s utter lack of power (zero homers in 1,234 at-bats), and here you have a .301 batter that was a net loss to his team even with 27 stolen bases, putting up a slash of .301/.325/.350. Even with that .301 batting average, he barely managed to get over the team average in OBP, a disastrous .312…

What about Claros, who played on four teams in the last two seasons? His numbers fluctuated wildly from a high .390 OBP with the Bayhawks in early 2022 to the natural low of .318 with the Coons in the second half of 2023. He finished the season in a slump, which is not designed to be an excuse, though it sounds like one. If you sign Claros to an extension (and I don’t even know whether we can) you have to get rid of Spencer, because there’s just no room for three second basemen on the roster, or you resign yourself to putting Spencer on the bench for those situations where there’s the go-ahead run on third base, two outs, and the pitcher’s spot up in the bottom of the sixth. He will put that ball in play.

Shane Walter can well spend another season at first base, given that Manuel Cardona was a gross disappointment. Batting .239/.282/.294 with no home runs in 109 at-bats as a first baseman automatically disqualifies you from any discussion.

There’s more conundrum in the outfield.

First off, you have Cookie Carmona and his huge extension which he cleverly signed him to before the season even began. His .247/.301/.279 slash in 104 games this year was by far the worst of his career, and it came at age 31. Of course we’ve seen MUCH better of him for a long time, and there’s no reason for him not to get back to his earlier OBP prowess (.386 OBP *one* year ago!), but “we’ve seen better of him before” is a dangerous argument and gave the Coons five more terrible years of David Vinson just a wee few years after his 1990 breakout. Since Cookie is not tradeable right now with the $7.5M commitment and the shambles performance and the health record, it’s best to pencil him in to bat first on Opening Day and refuse to think about it until then.

Omar Alfaro broke out late in ’23 and eventually hit 14 homers for a middling .724 OPS, which is far from great, but he was a lot better in the second half than in the first. Like, it wasn’t even close. He slugged .238 in June. He slugged .413 in September. He slugged .800 in July, but in a small sample size before getting hurt. The truth should lie somewhere between the July and September numbers. His power is for real. We might want to get ready for 130 strikeouts, but I fully expect him to potentially whack up to 30 dingers eventually.

I have to expect that. It’s all the hope to cling on to. It’s the Age of Omar after all.

There’s also Will Newman’s dead contract, whatever we want to make of Zach Graves’ erratic bat, and then the real issue, centerfield. Josh Stevenson was okay in maintaining the grass out there for three years, but never reached a league-average OPS. He’s a free agent, and I feel no urge to hold on. Frank Santos is a pile of nothing, who was sent packing even by the Wolves (though I should not speak ill of a team operating on next-to-no budget and beating the Coons by nine games while facing the Scorpions 18 times). Even his $290k estimate is too much for him. Which leaves us with Greg Borg, who got every chance we could stuff him with and batted .143/.176/.171. (Technically, there’s also still Dwayne Metts, who always hits in AAA, and never in the Bigs, but who’s not on the 40-man roster)

You know, the cynic in me advises to pack Cookie in center, since he obviously can’t withstand the vigors of playing any position anymore, and platoon Graves and Newman in left. Once Cookie invariably shatters in week 2, call up Borg to bat eighth, and spend a modest sum on a Eddie Jackson-like player to be the fifth outfielder in the meantime.

We also have somebody studying up to a business degree sitting next to me, but I can’t be certain whether Cristiano Carmona actually advises me to play Cookie because whenever he plays we sell 15% more uniforms at the park, or because he’s his ****ing brother. He also made a 78-slide Power Point presentation about starting Daniel Bullock at third base and batting cleanup, which has almost convinced me, I must admit.

Hey, we batted Matt Nunley cleanup for a .682 OPS all year, so how bad can Bullock reasonably be compared to that?

[Westheim]

In the last week of October, several developments occurred that we might want to go into. First of all, Josh Stevenson made it clear that he was worth seven figures per year, which did not quite occur to me. Seven figures for a not-even-quite-average batter? What’s next? 30 million for a star?

Raul Claros also had the idea that he was worth a million per year, at least. He at least had a better case than Stevenson, although his expectations might just as well save Jarod Spencer’s bacon.

The first idea was to try and flip Spencer for a centerfielder, although I was expecting other teams to glance past that .301 average as well and find a notorious hacker and singles-slapper. Yeah, the speed was nice to have, but he wasn’t offering anything even remotely exciting. Yes, you can bat .300 and still suck.

Perhaps we should figure out first how far we are actually away from competing again. How many pieces will it take? And how many pieces will it take when Alfaro and Tovias continue the slugging of the last two months, and Cookie and to some extent Nunley find back to former batting prowess?

I also wonder, when looking at Matt Huf, whether he would be more comfortable in the bullpen. He could be an absolutely murderous reliever. Maybe a bit like Ron Thrasher, just right-handed. The stuff would be enormous for a reliever. But if so, we’re suddenly at least one, and maybe two starting pitchers short of five, depending on your opinion on Juan Mendez (and mine isn’t all that high despite a 3-start, 2.21 ERA debut this fall).

By the end of the month, the Raccoons had signed a trio of pitchers to $300k extensions for 2024, including Travis Garrett, Vince Devereaux, and Cory Dew. Garrett actually signed a 2-year extension that would guarantee him $450k in 2025.

We also resigned Tony Delgado to another $400k contract, the same that he made in 2023. Adam Cowen signed for $270k, which was his arbitration estimate.

We also had a new head scout in 58-year-old Miguel Carrasco. He had no experience working for ABL teams, but apparently he had only the best credentials and flowery letters of recommendation from three different teams in the Chihuahua League. Which, you know… is in Mexico.

Something is fishy here…

+++

October 22 – The Loggers acquire MR David Warn (6-3, 3.05 ERA) from the Thunder. The price for the 26-year-old right-hander is a catching prospect.
October 27 – The Raccoons acquire 24-year-old OF/1B Cory Briscoe (.286, 1 HR, 19 RBI) from the Canadiens, who receive 34-yr-old RF/LF Will Newman (.288, 99 HR, 594 RBI) and a pair of 23-yr-old AA players in 3B Matt Anton and C Marco Vallejo.

+++

I would consider the Briscoe trade something of a masterpiece. How I managed to offload Will Newman and his hideously broken contract on the Elks for a young, juicy centerfielder without giving up anything of substance will forever remain a mystery. They deserve another 100 losses for their follies. Truth be told, I was really after Tony Coca, who is a year younger even at 23 and who is probably the better batter, but they wouldn’t give him up for anybody.

But just to show how mind-bogglingly lopsided the trade was … even the *Agitator* was raving over the deal. The *Agitator*. According to them I haven’t done anything right since… uh… well, probably since I last obnoxiously fleeced the Elks in the Kisho Saito deal?

Okay, since they still have Tony Coca, the Elks probably didn’t give up THAT much, but what did they get in return? Newman is never going to return his meal money for them, and what about the prospects? They are mired in AA and already 23, so that’s a bullet point there. Vallejo looked like a major league about one to two years ago, but was terrible this season, and our 2021 third-rounder Anton had a strong single-A campaign in the first half, but hit nothing in the second half in Ham Lake. They might still reach the majors, but they’re not All Stars. Anton is no loss to us, given that we still have a better 3B prospect in Mike Grigsby, who split the year between Ham Lake and St. Petersburg and hit in the .270s at either place, and also homered six times each. He does not have Matt Nunley’s strong defense, but should be decent enough at the hot corner, and did I mention he will not turn 22 until November?

The Briscoe deal changes A LOT. We no longer have a need for Josh Stevenson and he will not be offered arbitration. Frank Santos will also not get an offer (but he wasn’t likely to get one before). Whether Greg Borg is a prudent choice as backup … I don’t think so. Maybe a right-handed option will crop up, but there’s also the fact that the other two starting outfielders, Cookie and Alfaro, can both sub for Briscoe in a pinch. No, Cookie has not played a single inning in centerfield in the 2020s…

So, well, right now the team is better than it was when the curtain fell on the World Series, and we have more coin to play with. Good start to the offseason!

+++

2023 ABL AWARDS

Players of the Year: SAC RF/LF Pablo Sanchez (.369, 8 HR, 63 RBI) and ATL C Ruben Luna (.284, 26 HR, 103 RBI)
Pitchers of the Year: TOP SP Jose Lerma (20-9, 2.36 ERA) and TIJ CL Joel Davis (6-6, 1.27 ERA, 42 SV)
Rookies of the Year: SFW OF/1B Pedro Cisneros (.263, 6 HR, 37 RBI) and TIJ OF Nick Hatley (.297, 8 HR, 55 RBI)
Relievers of the Year: WAS CL Ben Marx (3-6, 2.03 ERA, 46 SV) and TIJ CL Joel Davis (6-6, 1.27 ERA, 42 SV)
Platinum Sticks (FL): P SFW John Rucker, C CIN Pat Walston, 1B RIC Luis Moreira, 2B DEN Rich Hereford, 3B CIN Eddie Moreno, SS WAS Tom McWhorter, LF SAC Doug Stross, CF CIN Nando Maiello, RF SAC Pablo Sanchez
Platinum Sticks (CL): P IND Alvin Smith, C ATL Ruben Luna, 1B CHA Pat Fowlkes, 2B CHA Matt Good, 3B LVA Jose Navarro, SS LVA Andres Medina, LF SFB Rafael Gomez, CF MIL Ian Coleman, RF IND Cesar Martinez
Gold Gloves (FL): P DAL Yoo-chul Kim, SAL C Armando Galan, 1B TOP Chris Owen, 2B SFW Dave Burfoot, 3B NAS Tony Fuentes, SS SAC Trey Rock, LF SFW Jeff Wadley, CF SAL Abel Mora, RF SAL Nate Ellis
Gold Gloves (CL): P TIJ George Griffin, C ATL Ruben Luna, 1B SFB Jon Gonzalez, 2B NYC Sergio Valdez, 3B LVA Jose Navarro, SS POR Tim Stalker, LF SFB Rafael Gomez, CF OCT Andy Bareford, RF LVA Dan Brown

How about Joel Davis being Pitcher of the Year …!? And I had him sour in the seventh inning…

I feel a lot less smart now. Maybe I should try to return Briscoe, too.

[Westheim]

Nothing out of the ordinary happened anymore before the free agency deadline on November 14. Raul Claros refused arbitration and became a free agent, and no arbitration had been offered in the first place to Jonny Toner, Josh Stevenson, and Frank Santos.

Who had that in the misery lottery even two years ago, that Jonny Toner’s contract would end and the Raccoons wouldn’t even make an honest effort to keep him around?

I couldn’t yet cry more than was decent for a man my age, because a shiny new toy was literally washed ashore in Florida in November, and it was almost too good to be true. A 21-year-old right-hander had made over by boat from Cuba, and his first showcase dazzled scouts from all attending teams. Young Dan (rumored to be short for Yusneldan) Delgadillo threw a 94mph heater, and strong curves, changeups, and forkballs for utmost effect and with great precision. He had the 6’, 190lbs body of a young demigod, and a winning smile as well.

No way that kid is 21 years old!

No way any other team is laying their dirty paws on this gem, either. Daddy needs a new plaything! *Thankfully*, money was available. Despite their small coffers, the Raccoons had a bit over $5M to wave in players’ faces. And weren’t we looking for an additional starting pitcher anyways? Caution was advised; the Cuban right-hander that we had already around (Chavez) had sported a scouting report not quite as flashy, but he had taken until 25 and some $2M into the fire to become a worthwhile major league pitcher. And I had a hunch early on that 4-yr, $3.6M wasn’t gonna cut it for Delgadillo.

Before we were going to blast $10M into one ear of a juvenile brainfart, and straight outta the other, perhaps we would be well advised to at least check out the free agent market. Despite his recent ruckus, and the injury, Jonny Toner was still graded as the highest-stuffed free agent starter on the market. There was Sam McMullen, one of numerous free agent Scorpions (so the FL West might be available this year), but he was already 35 and a type A free agent. He was a GOOD 35 though – he had won 20 games this year with a 3.14 ERA and had whiffed 203.

Another option out there was Frank Kelly, who had been briefly a Coon in 2022 before being traded in early July for the Blue Sox’ Matt Huf. It was a deal that right now both teams were losing, given that Kelly had gone down to a torn UCL and Tommy John surgery before the month had been out. He had spent most of 2023 unsigned and rehabbing the wing, finally signing a deal with the Pacifics in September. He made three late starts that painted a very unclear picture of what he had to offer now. In 22 innings, he had posted a 2.86 ERA, but even BB/9 and K/9 numbers of 4.5 … small sample size, right? Well, his K/9 in Portland in ’22 had not been much higher (4.7) in five times as many innings, but at least he hadn’t walked anybody (2.5).

The truth was probably somewhere in between for Kelly, who had the advantage of probably trying to rebuild value and of not having compensation attached. But, well, he pitched just as many innings as Toner the last two years combined, so you know that the cover is a lot prettier than the book between the ends.

There was also ex-Coons farmhand Graham Wasserman, 33, a free agent after pitching 200+ innings five straight years for San Francisco. His stats were quite good; he had never been a flamethrower or had thrown up massive strikeout totals. He had topped 150 K only three times in a career of 9+ seasons. He was only a type B free agent, so our second-round selection would also not be spoiled by pursuing him.

Yup, for a team with some coin lying around there was no reason NOT to sign an Opening Day starter off the market, because let’s be honest, between Rico Gutierrez, Jesus Chavez, and Travis Garrett I have a hard time selecting even a #3 if they’re starting behind Toner and Santos.

THOSE were the times. Toner, Santos, Abe, and only on Thursday the worries start again… By the way, Hector Santos retired at age 35 after a disastrous campaign with the Rebels, who even hid him in the pen at the grisly end. He ended up with a 129-90 record and 3.19 ERA, plus 1,839 strikeouts. Probably no Hall of Famer there.

I want Delgadillo. Any way I can.

There was also the mild issue on the right side of the infield to repair. Well, the departure of Claros had done a lot to soften the pain there. There was nobody stopping the Critters from continuing to run out Jarod Spencer at second, and Shane Walter at first, and continuously being annoyed by Spencer. You would it consider to be feasible to find a better first baseman, at least offensively than Shane Walter, and I am talking mostly pop here. Yes, Alfaro and Tovias showed power in the second half. The spectre of Chris Beairsto is still flickering above either one of those two.

I am looking for that anchor bat. Matt Nunley batting cleanup might have been one of many reasons why the Coons had the absolute worst offense in the league in 2023. Don’t get me wrong, I love Matt to bits, but he’s not a cleanup hitter. You know, the goal should be to get him into a more suitable spot. I am thinking about the #6 hole or something like that. He’d be right at home in the #6 hole. Now, Tovias hit the most homers, but his swing as a few gross holes. He’ll be 24 next year, all of this can still get better. Alfaro could bat ahead of Nunley. Adjusted for the time he missed on the DL or shared space with other outfielders in the first half of the season, he had slightly more homers per exposure than Tovias, and a higher average.

Nah, I’m looking for that true #4 bat. Good average, monster power. I’ve been looking for that guy ever since the Duke Smack era ended, and no, Hugo Mendoza was never my guy. He could never do well enough for my expectations.

Is Jon Gonzalez that type of player? He batted .288 with 70 extra-base hits, including 24 dingers, for the Bayhawks this year in what was his first full season in the league, having turned 26 in May. The power is real, and the best thing of all might be that the Bayhawks didn’t outright flip me off and are actually ready to talk. The problem is that they are exclusively after pitching and have no interest in Shane Walter or Jarod Spencer, at all.

This is where I can play my strengths, you know. Tactfully manipulating the other GM into disliking his own players and leaving them to me for next to nothing has always been my special move. Right after coming up with new ideas for cocktails with pills. If I play my cards right, maybe we can accelerate that rebuild …!

[Jacksono69]

( A man with a long, black raggedy beard wearing a torn and twice fixed 15 Hall jersey stumbles and falls into the room.) He...Hello? I’ve been waiting so long (long pause).... so long. I’ve spent 2 months on a pilgrimage throughout time and space, revisiting every game, every offseason, and every moment. I would like to say.....(void opens and the man is whisked back to whatever place he came from.....)








(In all seriousness, thank you for this unbelievable thread. Just spent 2 months reading,starting from the beginning. Please continue)

[Westheim]

Originally Posted by Jacksono69

( A man with a long, black raggedy beard wearing a torn and twice fixed 15 Hall jersey stumbles and falls into the room.) He...Hello? I’ve been waiting so long (long pause).... so long. I’ve spent 2 months on a pilgrimage throughout time and space, revisiting every game, every offseason, and every moment. I would like to say.....(void opens and the man is whisked back to whatever place he came from.....)

(In all seriousness, thank you for this unbelievable thread. Just spent 2 months reading,starting from the beginning. Please continue)

You, Sir, are deserving of a medal! Or at least a cookie. Unfortunately... (rummages through all the drawers in the desk) ... it seems like the players have eaten every single crumb in the building before leaving for the winter.

Well, Raccoons, what are ya gonna... (shrugs)

+++

The bells of All Sinners’ Church in downtown Portland rang feverishly on Sunday morning, November 19, when news broke that the Raccoons had struck a 5-player deal with the Bayhawks overnight that would doubtlessly rebuild the franchise in a hurry. Father Ted’s sermon during that Sunday’s sermon, which he delivered wearing a Raccoons cap and waving a small Raccoons flag, explained the trade in detail to the congregation and how Moses had wandered the desert for 40 years, but with the right amount of faith, the Raccoons would have reached their destination in just two years. Several older men in the attendance could be seen weeping before the congregation delivered a smashing triple Hallelujah!

Let’s dive into it, shall we?

The Raccoons will send three starting pitchers to San Francisco, including 24-yr-old Matt Huf (7-16, 4.36 ERA), 25-yr-old Jonathan Shook (1-4, 7.99 ERA), and 23-yr-old AAA Reese Kenny.

Now before you throw something, let me explain. The big loss in the pack is undoubtedly Huf, who has characteristics of Antonio Donis, including his habit of walking anything standing remotely close to the plate. He might eventually figure it out in the rotation, or maybe he can be that murderous reliever that I envisioned him as recently. It’s hard to say, really. His stuff is comparable to Ron Thrasher, who also had and has the same incidental control troubles.

Shook is a well-mannered young man that knows a thing or two about delivering a ball, but unfortunately he god torn up for that near-8 ERA in his cup of coffee mid-season, lasting only 23.2 innings in five starts, walking three for every strikeout. What really makes him readily expendable are his AAA numbers, where he tossed 170 innings for a 10-8 record, 4.13 ERA, and 4.0 BB/9 with only 5.9 K/9. He’s 24, he should have grown some stuff by now. Reese Kenny, our first-rounder in 2019, was outright abysmal in AAA this year, pitching to a 7-12 record, 5.98 ERA, and 7.3 BB/9 against 5.4 K/9. I doubt there’s any fixing for this one.

We might want to talk about what the Coons get for their troubles. Well, I have already hinted at 1B Jon Gonzalez (.281, 42 HR, 174 RBI), who mashed 70 extra-base hits last year and dingered 24 times. Remember Luke “Duke Smack” Black, who couldn’t get a ball out of the park at the Bay? Imagine Gonzalez doubling down like that in Raccoons Ballpark! And so far, he is still making the minimum …! It’s pretty obvious that Shane Walter will not start at first base anymore, but we will get to that later.

Who’s the second player the Raccoons receive in the deal? Oh, merely the guy I dubbed “the next Jonny Toner” a few years ago. 29-year-old left-hander Mark Roberts (46-42, 3.12 ERA) led the league in strikeouts in both of the last two seasons, and also led it in WHIP in ’23. His stuff is truly hideous and he can mix six pitches to unnerve opposing batters. He throws 100mph fire, has a wicked slider, and mixes in curves, changeups, splitters, and forkballs for pleasure. There is the caveat that he can’t move the 100mph heat, which comes dead straight, leading to many home runs if someone should accidentally make contact and keep it fair. But hey, they’re SOLO home runs!

Other players the Bayhawks would have taken on in the deal were Vince D, Joe Moore, or any between Gutierrez, Chavez, and Garrett. Also, kindly, Omar Alfaro. But they were always going to take Huf – there was no deal without Matt Huf. Best thing is, since Gonzalez is so dirt cheap (minimum), we still have almost $4M to play around with. And we need a fifth starter (not so keen on Mendez; or, heck, “Tragic” Travis), and a right-handed backup outfielder. And whatever improvement can be made over Daniel Bullock, even though Cristiano Carmona will doubtlessly give me The Look for even stating that.

Mmmm, Mark Roberts, yummy. I think we got our Opening Day starter?

[Westheim]

During the latter half of November, the Crusaders resigned INF Sergio Valdez for another six years, so he will remain a mainstay in the opposing lineup. Valdez has been batting .285 with 74 dingers in his career. That wasn’t their only “addition”…

I mostly busied myself with polishing our 1992 and 1993 trophies and wondered where I’d put the third one next year by this time. Do not judge – fall is the time for delusion before reality will grimly swoop in around April 15.

I also tried to acquire a low-profile, cheap, and serviceable right-handed outfielder as a backup to the various crew we already have and to be paired with Zach Graves as reservers on the green part of fair territory. I tried to get the Gold Sox’ … what’s his name again? Steve Rokosky. You have never heard of him, and he’s not really Eddie Jackson material, but what we are looking for here is any kind of upgrade over Greg Borg and/or Dwayne Metts (who was not on the 40-man roster). I even tried to get Man-su Kim from the Buffaloes, who still smelled of Elk from his years in Vancouver, but me trying to not give up anything major in a deal largely led to … no deal.

Before we knew it, the rule 5 draft zoomed up… I had my eyes on two players, a pitcher and a right-handed outfielder, both already past typical prospect age – cough, 28, cough – and merely insurance plans in case our other plans (like Dan Delgadillo) wouldn’t work out.

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November 20 – The Scorpions trade 33-yr old 2B Ricky Luna (.272, 162 HR, 751 RBI) and cash to the Rebels for 29-yr old MR Zhuo-Cheng Li (2-0, 5.40 ERA, 1 SV) and a prospect.
November 27 – The Crusaders sign ex-SAL LF/RF Nate Ellis (.294, 118 HR, 518 RBI) to a 5-yr, $16.4M contract.
December 1 – Rule 5 Draft: 22 players are drafted across three rounds; the Raccoons add 28-year-old SP Kaleb Babcock from the Titans and 27-year-old OF/1B Hector Barcenas (.214, 1 HR, 14 RBI) from the Miners.
December 1 – At it again, the Crusaders ink ex-CIN SS Piet Oosterom (.260, 9 HR, 473 RBI). The 31-year-old signs a 1-yr, $630k deal.
December 1 – The Stars trade 28-year-old righty SP Jay Schimek (54-66, 4.87 ERA) to the Blue Sox for two prospects.

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Like I said, these two rule 5 picks are not serious contenders for Opening Day. Barcenas might have chances if I can’t unearth any sort of non-left-handed outfielder to match with Graves; Babcock’s scouting report sure looks nice, but he’s a stretch to be the #5 even now without signing Delgadillo, who is still weighing his options. Babcock has never pitched in the majors, while Barcenas most recently appeared in 2022 for the Miners.

Come here, Dan, come here, we’ve always been good to players named Dan(iel) in Portland, and we already have a Cuban buddy for you to bond with!

Various Raccoons finding a cushion to fall on: Mike Denny signed a $492k deal with the Miners; Frank Santos got two years, $444k total from the Stars;

Also out: the Hall of Fame ballot!

Anybody on there you like?

[UltimateAverageGuy]

Interested to see how Rin, Tobitt and Trevin fare in the voting....cant wait for the alert!

[Westheim]

Originally Posted by UltimateAverageGuy

Interested to see how Rin, Tobitt and Trevin fare in the voting....cant wait for the alert!

Those are the only ones that concern you?