[Westheim]

And so it comes down to this, the final week of the season. The Canadiens have not made the playoffs since 1990. And I want them to suffer for longer. Much much longer.

Raccoons (91-65) @ Loggers (55-101) – September 24-26, 2012

The miserable Loggers (remember that they were around .500 well into May?) had won only 12 games since the end of July, and only wanted it to me over. Please, let it be over, they yawned. They had the worst team ERA, an impossibly bad bullpen with a 5.35 ERA, bottom two ranks in walks allowed and strikeouts, and the offense didn’t look any better than that, although they were ninth in runs scored. No, no hope. They were a really, really, really bad team – with injuries! And the Raccoons had run them 10-5 after a rocky start.

Projected matchups:
Scott Spears (10-5, 3.31 ERA) vs. Roy Thomas (6-10, 5.29 ERA)
Rich Hood (7-6, 3.66 ERA) vs. Melvin Alvarado (1-3, 3.57 ERA)
Hector Santos (12-11, 3.52 ERA) vs. Fernando Cruz (6-20, 4.28 ERA)

The one thing that worries me is the pair of left-handers we’re going to face in Alvarado and Cruz. They are not THAT bad, and Cruz had not lost any of his two starts against the Critters. If things are going according to plan, Spears makes his last start of the season, because we will have Brown, Baldwin, Hood, and Santos aligned for up to four games in Vancouver.

Game 1
POR: 2B Nomura – SS Palmer – CF Sambrano – 1B Quebell – LF Pruitt – C D. Alexander – RF J. Alexander – 3B Merritt – P Spears
MIL: CF Brissett – 1B Pace – LF Dally – SS Luján – RF Gilmor – 2B O. Sandoval – C Lemberger – 3B F. Cuevas – P R. Thomas

Yoshi hit his 40th double of the year to open the game and scored eventually on Quebell’s groundout, before the Raccoons started to play ****ball again and hit into inning-ending double plays in the first, third, and fourth innings. And while the Loggers’ lineup was distilled of the essence of sadness, they managed to rout Scott Spears anyway. He was already in a tight spot in the first inning, and in the second, but there was no rescue after a leadoff single by pitcher Roy Thomas (…) and another single by Amari Brissett in the bottom 3rd. Justin Dally’s double equalized, and Antonio Luján brought in the go-ahead run with a groundout, and another run scored after two more leadoff singles in the fourth. The scoreboard offered a grim look at the Elks drubbing the Crusaders in New York, so we had to drag this one out of the dreck, but a John Alexander triple didn’t lead to anything, and if you don’t score with triples, when are you going to score then?

The Coons were still down 3-1 after six, with Spears already hiding under a towel in the dugout. Merritt wrestled a leadoff walk from Roy Thomas in the top 7th, and George Youngblood, who had cleaned up Spears’ mess in the sixth inning, was hit for with Tomas Castro, who clocked a hard drive to right center and into the gap, then chased Merritt around the base paths. Jon Merritt scored, and Castro slid in at third base with an RBI triple, and was now the tying run, and Yoshi Nomura didn’t have to be asked a lot – he singled to left, tied game. The Loggers began to slide, Palmer doubled, and Yoshi scored on a Sambrano sac fly to take the lead for Coon City, 4-3, but Nick Gilmor made a strong catch on Dylan Alexander to end the inning with Palmer still on second and Quebell (int. walk) behind him. Sugano was assigned the seventh against the top of the order, but remained stuck after a 2-out walk to Justin Dally. Steele replaced him to look after the right-handed Antonio Luján, who clanked the 1-1 pitch to deep left. Bloody - … no! no! no! No, Castro caught it AT THE ****ING TRACK after replacing Pruitt for defense. Oh well, thought Steele, I’ll blow it in the eighth then! And waked Gilmor, and allowed a single to Oscar Sandoval to start the bottom 8th. Ron Thrasher would have to deal with that mess, struck out Tommy Lemberger in a full count, also struck out Suketsune Ito, and then Kurt Phillips hit a HARD line to right, John Alexander threw himself at that rocket and managed to contain it – inning over! Yoshi drew a leadoff walk against Tim Poe in the top 9th, was run for by Carmona, and Carmona was caught stealing, and nobody scored. Angel Casas was up against the top of the order in the bottom 9th and struck out the side. 4-3 Critters. Nomura 3-4, BB, 2B, RBI; Palmer 3-5, 2B; J. Alexander 2-4, 3B; Castro (PH) 1-2, 3B;

The Elks crushed the Crusaders, 9-2, while the Titans beat the Indians on “Quasimodo” Suda’s walkoff homer in the 12th inning, 6-4, so everything stays the same in the North. POR in first, VAN .5 GB, BOS 4.5 GB. Of course, the Titans are about to run out of time. Both Northwest teams have to start losing right now for the Titans to retain a chance. The best outcome of our weekend series for the Titans would be the Elks to take two of three, but even then the Titans would have to win all their games now to force a game 163.

Game 2
POR: 2B Nomura – SS Palmer – CF Sambrano – 1B Quebell – 3B Merritt – LF Pruitt – C Bowen – RF Ayers – P Hood
MIL: 1B Pace – 3B Sharp – SS Luján – RF Dally – 2B O. Sandoval – C R. Hernandez – LF Hodgers – CF Gilmor – P M. Alvarado

The Elks trailed 2-0 in New York as this game began, and Rich Hood was in mortal danger as early as the first inning after an infield single by Sharpie and a proper single by Luján, but somehow the Loggers failed themselves out of the inning when Palmer started a nice double play on Dally’s grounder. The completely unloved Craig Bowen would give the Raccoons a lead in the top 2nd, scoring Adrian Quebell with a single to right. After Ayers drew a walk, the bases were loaded (Merritt had also reached on a single), Hood hit a ball hard to the left side, but Luján made a leaping grab, but then Alvarado walked in a run against Nomura anyway. 2-0 remained the score after Palmer grounded out to short, but not for long. Sambrano was caught stealing in the top 3rd, and in the bottom 3rd the Loggers cooked Hood completely. With one out, he walked Tim Pace, allowed singles to Sharp and Luján, walked Dally to force in a run, then balked to tie the game. Oscar Sandoval hit a 2-run single – it was AWFUL all along. Hood was yanked in the next inning after Nick Gilmor’s leadoff double and a walk to Tim Pace, trailing 4-2 with two on and one out. Sharp’s double off Josh Gibson brought in the next run, and Pace scored on Luján’s sac fly, 6-2. From there, all was lost. Neither did the offense do anything – except for the eighth, when we had Pruitt and Bowen in scoring position and J-Alex hit for Ayers with two outs and went down flailing against TED REESE – and the parade of long relievers / failed starters that followed on Gibson’s insufficient appearance plated an unearned run with a throwing error (Williams) or loaded the bases and somehow didn’t get set on fire (Williams as well, also Youngblood/Conway in the seventh), OR was drummed for a 2-run homer by Raúl Hernandez, a whimsical .218 batter with no power. That was also Conway, in the eighth. 9-3 Loggers. Gutierrez (PH) 1-1, RBI; Quebell 2-5; Pruitt 2-4; Bowen 2-4, 2B, RBI; Seeley (PH) 1-1;

Things nevertheless remain the same in the North. The Titans lost 8-6 to Indy, and Martin Ortíz’ first-inning, 2-run homer stood up in the Elks’ game in New York, beating them 2-0. With their loss, the Titans are mathematically eliminated. It’s down to the Northwest now.

Game 3
POR: 2B Nomura – SS Palmer – CF Sambrano – 1B Quebell – 3B Merritt – LF Pruitt – C Bowen – RF Gentry – P Santos
MIL: CF Brissett – 1B Pace – SS Luján – LF Dally – 3B Sharp – C R. Hernandez – 2B O. Sandoval – RF Gilmor – P F. Cruz

Another left-hander (I had the horrors before the game ever began and couldn’t sleep all night), and the Raccoons needed to win this one DIRELY, with the Elks having a game in hand on the following off day for the Critters. If we win this one, two out of three will always be enough on the weekend. If we lose this one, we might need to win three, and …

And the Coons had Yoshi and Palmer on base in the top 1st, and then Sambrano, Quebell, and Merritt all hit the ball hard and deep, and all three were caught. Brissett, Gilmor, Brissett, for those scoring at home. Amari Brissett then promptly singled off Santos to start the bottom 1st. Santos had been a mess for most of September, 1-3 with a 3.60 ERA and no outs logged in the sixth inning, and promptly threw a bean to Antonio Luján that never came down anywhere. The Loggers led 2-0 on the massive homer, and the Raccoons glanced at the scoreboard and saw that second place was awaiting them if they couldn’t come up with something. A pair of triples in the top 3rd was exactly the right medicine. Yoshi had led off with a walk, scored on Sambrano’s triple, who himself came in on a wild pitch. Merritt then tripled, but was left on base… In turn, relief was temporary, with Quebell not only not scoring Sambrano from third with one out, but also getting the Loggers going with a grievous error when trying to pick up an easy roller by Brissett at the start of the bottom 3rd. The Loggers promptly socked two more singles off Santos to take a 3-2 lead, he walked Sharp to load the bases, but then Hernandez struck out and Sandoval grounded out to third base. Still, it was all a right mess.

It was about to get worse before it could get better. Santos was right at 90 pitches after five innings, and thus would not log an out in the sixth for the fifth consecutive game. Plus, Jon Merritt hurt himself on a defensive play in the bottom of the fifth inning, handling an at first glance casual grounder. Walt Canning, batting a great .063, replaced him. The Raccoons looked a bit adrift in the top 6th until Craig Bowen out of the blue socked a 2-out homer to tie the score at three. Cruz then walked Gentry, and Jason Seeley hit for Santos, and ALSO turned on a bad pitch and yanked a go-ahead 2-run homer! The Raccoons were ahead! But for how long? Slayton managed an accident-free sixth, but in the seventh all possible setup candidates conspired to give me a tear in a major artery. Sugano walked the leadoff man, PH Chris Harris before getting Brissett. Steele replaced him and allowed singles to Pace an Luján, the latter scoring a run, before leaving without anybody retired on his watch. On to Thrasher, who smacked Justin Dally to load the sacks in a 5-4 game. Oh dear. Then Sharp struck out (he was batting soundly under .200 against Portland, compared to .292 overall), and Raúl Hernandez was retired on a bouncer back to Thrasher. OH MY GOD. STOP ****ING UP!!

No. Oh dear, no. Sandoval led off with a double against Thrasher in the bottom 8th, representing the tying run too close to home plate for comfort. Date Tate’s bloop single moved him to third with one out before Josh Gibson replaced him and struck out Phillips. Edgar Alires came out to pinch-hit, a left-hander, but I wasn’t buying into Youngblood after is previous outing. Alires singled to center, tied ballgame, and Hernandez won it for the Loggers with a double that scored Daniel Sharp in the bottom 9th, cocked up by Conway. 6-5 Loggers. Bowen 2-3, BB, HR, RBI; Seeley (PH) 1-1, HR, 2 RBI;

The Elks blew their slim lead late, but still beat the Crusaders in ten, 3-2, and the Raccoons now sat in a really ****ty hole.

Thursday was a bit of good news, bad news. Jon Merritt was still in pain with a bad back and was unable to play on the weekend at least. Good news had the Elks lose 8-6 in New York, making the final weekend set a Best of 3, no strings attached.

Raccoons (92-67) @ Canadiens (92-67) – September 28-30, 2012

Here it comes. They are third in runs scored and runs allowed, with the second-best rotation. We are fifth in runs scored and second in runs allowed, with the fifth-best rotation. We lead the season series, 9-6, and have won it the last three years. But we need an 11-7 to make this one here a nice experience.

Projected matchups:
Nick Brown (15-8, 2.39 ERA) vs. Brad Osborne (10-10, 4.39 ERA)
Colin Baldwin (5-4, 4.07 ERA) vs. Johnny Krom (16-7, 3.02 ERA)
Rich Hood (7-7, 3.97 ERA) vs. Rod Taylor (16-13, 3.78 ERA)

Left-hander in the middle game, but I am even more worried about Rod Taylor who’s way better than his ERA indicates, and Rich Hood has been a bit like a used piece of gum recently. He was stuck everywhere where you didn’t need him, mostly the fourth inning.

It should be understood right away that if we don’t take the opener, there’s no hope. And I feel like we have a better shot against Krom than against Taylor. Although, looking at the numbers, Taylor faced the Critters twice in 2012, and never made it out of the fifth inning, saddled with a 13 ERA.

Listen, Nick. That Sunday game against Hamlyn – that was a blast. I need another one of those.

Game 1
POR: 2B Nomura – SS Palmer – RF Sambrano – 1B Quebell – LF Pruitt – CF Carmona – C D. Alexander – 3B Roudabush – P Brown
VAN: CF Holland – RF K. Evans – 1B Gilbert – LF Cameron – 3B Suzuki – 2B T. Pena – SS Lawrence – C M. Thomas – P Osborne

Brownie got a headstart when Osborne walked a pair in the first, and while Quebell struck out both Palmer and Sandy scored on back-to-back 2-out singles by Matt Pruitt and Ricardo Carmona, 2-0 in the middle of the first. And then Brownie … walked Ross Holland, and Kurt Evans hit an infield single. Oh ****ing hell. Ray Gilbert grounded out, Don Cameron popped one up, and Mitsuhide Suzuki grounded out to Palmer, and the runners were stranded in scoring position. That Nick Brown had NOTHING was pretty clear pretty soon, and it was not pretty at all. The Elks had their first two men (Osborne and Holland) on in the third with singles, and the baseball gods themselves barely knew how he wiggled out of that mess, but Evans popped out, Gilbert flew out to right, and Don Cameron went down swinging, Brown’s first strikeout in the game. In between the Coons had wasted a Brown single in the top 2nd with a double play, and Palmer had been caught stealing in the third.

Bottom 4th, Suzuki opened with yet another single, stole second (of course), Tony Pena singled, runners on the corners, and then a wild pitch (oy) and a Palmer error (oy!) and we had a tied game, with the go-ahead run on second base and nobody out. Good defense would keep Jaylin Lawrence on third base in the inning, but who was going to save us if not Nick Brown?

Well maybe Dave Roudabush. Yeah, actually. Roudabush hit a leadoff single in the top 5th, was bunted over by Brown – at least that worked – and then scored on Yoshi’s single. Coons ahead again! The next inning it was Roudabush to bat with two outs and runners on the corners. He grounded to short, but at least Lawrence made an error now and Pruitt scored, 4-2. Despite sucking badly, Brownie batted with two outs, since the bullpen had shown its very best side in the last two games in Milwaukee, and at least he didn’t allow hard contact, just singles. He grounded up the middle, and Tony Pena made the play to end the inning. Lawrence hit a 2-out single in the bottom of the sixth and tried to make it two, but Pruitt threw him out at second.

SOMEHOW Nick Brown made it through seven with the 4-2 lead, the baseball equivalent of a penniless man wandering into a restaurant and getting to eat for free. Whom to trust in the eighth, with right-left-right up? A damn good question. Steele was dog ****, period. So Slayton got the ball. He got the right-handed parts Gilbert and Suzuki, but Don Cameron had doubled with one out. Lefty Jose Mendoza hit for the relief pitcher, with Sugano replacing Slayton, and at 2-2 a hard grounder to right, but Quebell threw himself in front of the ball and made the play to end the inning. D-Alex’ insurance homer in the top 9th was not needed in the end: Angel Casas made short work of Lawrence (K), Thomas (5-3) and Joey Koka (4-3). 5-2 Brownies! Nomura 3-5, RBI; Pruitt 2-4, RBI; Carmona 2-4, RBI; Brown 7.0 IP, 7 H, 2 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 1 K, W (16-8) and 1-2;

How the hell did this game not blow up? I don’t know. I just don’t know.

Okay boys! We need ONE more! ONE more! Can you give me ONE more?

There was a little thing, though. There would be no Johnny Krom. Rod Taylor was moved up to this game to start on short rest, and that could only mean that Juichi Fujita (20-8, 3.50 ERA) was going to start the last game on short rest, too. And that was probably not a bad move by the Elks.

Game 2
POR: 2B Nomura – SS Palmer – RF Sambrano – 1B Quebell – LF Pruitt – CF Carmona – C D. Alexander – 3B Roudabush – P Baldwin
VAN: CF Holland – RF K. Evans – 1B Gilbert – LF Cameron – 3B Suzuki – 2B T. Pena – SS Lawrence – C M. Thomas – P R. Taylor

Rod Taylor led the league in strikeouts with 258, and he started murdering the Raccoons right away, sitting down the first ten Furballs with half a dozen strikeouts. Baldwin allowed two singles in the first, but no runs, and had four strikeouts after three innings. Palmer was the first Coon to reach, hitting a 1-out single in the fourth. Sambrano walked on a close call in a full count, and then Quebell singled to load them up for Pruitt, who struck out, but Carmona clubbed the first pitch. Pena leapt after the liner, but it was too high and INTO THE GAP! Palmer in to score, Sandy in to score, Quebell in to score, Carmona standing up at third base – bases-clearing triple!!

Cut down on the euphoria, though. Baldwin was tagged for a run in the bottom 4th, and Michael Palmer came out of the game with an arm injury after an awkward throw on Mark Thomas’ grounder that bounced well before it reached Quebell and almost escaped the first-sacker for unfathomable calamity. The Elks whipped three more singles and another run off Baldwin in the fifth, and now only trailed 3-2. Roudabush was on base in the fifth and seventh, Baldwin bunted him into scoring position twice, and he was always left on second base. Bottom 7th, Juan Medina hit for Rod Taylor – the 28-year old’s first plate appearance of the year! – and hit a leadoff double. WHY!!?? Ross Holland dropped down a drag bunt and legged it out for a single, and Medina scored from third on Kurt Evans’ sac fly to right, tying the game. Holland would be caught stealing, but the damage was done. The Coons stranded two more in the eighth before having to face closer Pedro Alvarado (103 K in 69.1 IP…) in the top 9th, and he struck out the side. Bottom 9th, Ron Thrasher pitching, and thus mortal danger even without someone in the batter’s box. Leadoff single by Jaylin Lawrence. Mark Thomas struck out. Single by the ****ing Clint Southcott. Holland struck out. Left-hander Alonso Baca batted for Alvarado. 0-2, grounded up the middle, Yoshi over, to first – extra innings.

The Coons were fooled by Pat Treglown in the 10th and 11th, while Steele in the former and Youngblood in the latter had men on, but the Elks couldn’t push through. Southcott, the arse, hit into an inning-ending double play, 3-6-3, in the bottom 11th, which tasted good. Then, the top 12th, and runners on base! Roudabush led off with a single, and then Castro was hit by Treglown, who then struck out Yoshi Nomura for a golden sombrero and an 0-6 day. Then John Alexander hit into a double play. Bottom 13th, Sugano was in his second frame, Suzuki drew a leadoff walk. Mark Austin tried to bunt him over, but Sugano went the aggro way and got Suzuki at second base, and the Elks were kept from walking off again. The winning run was on second again in the bottom 14th when Slayton replaced Sugano to face Ray Gilbert, the slugger. Slayton walked both him and Cameron to load the bases with two outs, and now we had to throw in Angel Casas, who never threw a pitch. Instead, he twitched on the rubber, a tiny little muscle tic, but the second base umpire called him out, hollering “That’s a balk!!” – and it was game over. 4-3 Canadiens. Roudabush 2-5; Castro 1-1;

Angel.

Why.

Why did you forsake me.

Game 3
POR: 2B Nomura – RF Sambrano – LF Pruitt – 1B Quebell – C D. Alexander – CF Carmona – SS Roudabush – 3B M. Gutierrez – P Hood
VAN: CF Holland – RF K. Evans – 1B Gilbert – LF Cameron – 3B Suzuki – 2B T. Pena – SS Lawrence – C M. Thomas – P Fujita

Rich Hood had not completed six innings in four consecutive starts, and had allowed 3+ runs in his last six starts. Juichi Fujita was Juichi Fujita.

Carmona singled with two outs in the second and was caught stealing, giving the Raccoons an 0/4 pace in stolen bases this week. Hood retired the first six before Lawrence and Thomas hit singles to start the bottom 3rd. Fujita bunted them over before Holland lined out hard to Yoshi and Evans flew out to Pruitt. The Coons also had two singles in the top 4th, Yoshi and Pruitt, before the useless Quebell and Alexander struck out. Instead, Ray Gilbert rammed a leadoff homer in the bottom of the inning, no doubt about that one, his 29th on the year, and the Raccoons were sent spinning in a 1-0 deficit. While the Raccoons failed to mount anything even remotely resembling offense, Ray Gilbert whacked another one his next time up, 2-0.

Time was running out at a frantic pace. Three innings left, and Fujita had yet to break a sweat. Dylan Alexander hit a 2-out single to left in the seventh, but Carmona bounced out harmlessly. Fujita batted in the bottom 7th, two outs and nobody on against Steele – and singled. ****ING ASSHOLE STEELE!! Youngblood managed to retire Ross Holland, but there were only six outs remaining, and Fujita still looked like everything was under control. Castro hit for Roudabush to start the top 8th and singled to center, and the Gutierrez singled to right! Oh dear, the tying runs on with nobody out! John Alexander batted for Youngblood, but flew out harmlessly to right. Yoshi hit into a fielder’s choice, getting Gutierrez nipped at second base. Sandy walked, and Fujita was still in there! And why would they remove him? One strike to Pruitt, two strikes to Pruitt, three strikes to Pruitt and the inning was over. Top 9th, Pedro Alvarado (106 K in 70.1 IP…). Quebell singled to right, Alexander struck out. Carmona singled to right, tying runs on first and second. Castro hit a 2-1 pitch to deep left, Don Cameron racing back, and that one was – gonna be - … NOOO, HE CAUGHT IT!! A pinch-hitter for Gutierrez was needed. On a broken bench, Craig Bowen was the best of the rest. He flew out to center. 2-0 Canadiens. Carmona 2-4; Castro (PH) 1-2;

In other news

September 26 – The Miners clinch the FL East behind a strong performance by 24-game winner Miguel Rodriguez, beating the Capitals 5-1. It is the Miners’ fourth playoff appearance, and the first since 1995. They have never won the World Series.
September 26 – Topeka’s SP Brian Patrick (10-12, 4.33 ERA) 3-hits the Blue Sox in a 7-0 shutout.
September 28 – The Knights’ Pat Arnette (.268, 4 HR, 40 RBI) has a double in the Knights’ 9-2 defeat at the hands of the Falcons, extending a hitting streak to 20 games.
September 29 – OCT INF Emilio Farias (.358, 1 HR, 101 RBI) breaks the single season hit record held by 1990 Rebel Manuel Doval, knocking three hits against the Aces (in a 5-4 extra inning loss) to reach 248 hits in total for the season.
September 29 – WAS SP Chris York (16-6, 3.59 ERA) wins his 200th game with a 7-inning shutout performance in the Capitals’ 2-1 win over the Blue Sox.
September 30 – PIT 1B Steve Butler (.342, 25 HR, 110 RBI) will miss the playoffs after hurting his wrist.

Complaints and stuff

There are no words.