[Westheim]

Raccoons (46-65) @ Indians (54-58) – August 7-9, 2023

With splendid chances to lose ten games on a four-town trip, the Critters crawled into Indianapolis for a 3-game set starting on Monday, their last games on a 16-day stint without an off day. Off days would be plentiful from here on for them, with a day off every week for the rest of the month. Matt Huf better behave in his Monday start! We’d then play 18 games in 17 days to start the month of September.

The Indians were ninth in runs scored and tenth in runs allowed, so pretty meh overall. “pretty meh” was still good enough to hold the Raccoons to a .333 clip in the season series, which stood 8-4 in favor of the Arrowheads.

Projected matchups:
Matt Huf (1-8, 5.33 ERA) vs. Brandon Smith (2-2, 4.40 ERA)
Chris McKendrick (4-6, 3.41 ERA) vs. Tom Shumway (12-2, 2.58 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (7-7, 3.91 ERA) vs. Alvin Smith (5-7, 4.13 ERA)

Two right-handers named Smith sandwiching Tom Shumway, the lefty; that was, if Alvin Smith could make it. He was laboring on a hamstring, not the only injury to the Indians’ staff in the last few weeks. They were also without the services of Lowell Genge, who had suffered a hand contusion on Friday and was going to take it day by day, but was not on the DL, and also without infielder Bob Reyes, although they were probably missing Genge’s .282 bat and 13 homers more than Reyes’ powerless .263 act.

Game 1
POR: RF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF Spencer – CF Stevenson – C Delgado – SS Bullock – P Huf
IND: 2B R. Mendez – SS Janes – LF Faulk – RF C. Martinez – 1B M. Rucker – CF D. Morales – C Calhoun – 3B Rolland – P B. Smith

Doubles by Claros and Nunley plated a run in the first for the Critters, with Nunley reaching 50 RBI on the season, which was cute for a team and player that had 111 games on the clock already, and one ribbie behind Shane Walter. Nunley turned a double play in the bottom 1st as well after Huf predictably walked the first Indian up, Rich Mendez, and the Critters pushed out two more runs in the second inning even despite Daniel Bullock being thrown out at home plate on Huf’s 1-out RBI single that came with Stevenson and Bullock in scoring position. Cookie’s double up the rightfield line would score Huf for the second run in the inning. While his pitching made you cringe, Huf came up with another single in the fourth inning, and again Stevenson and Bullock were on board, but this time 90 feet further back, respectively. A.J. Faulk was on the ball quickly and Stevenson was held at third base, bringing up Cookie with one out and three aboard. Cookie was batting a mind-boggling .196 with runners in scoring position and lined the first pitch into Smith’s glove for a staggering and deflating out, followed soon by Raul Claros’ pop to third base that stranded all runners.

By the fifth inning, Huf had three leadoff walks on his ledger, but not only had the Indians not scored, hitting into two double plays along the way, he was also still pitching a no-hitter, technically. In actuality, Matt Huf had a hard time pitching a no-hitter, given that he regularly missed the target so grossly that an entire park full of people would hit their forehead with their palms… Mendez ended the bid with a 2-out single to rightfield, cleanly hit, nothing to complain, in the bottom of the sixth, but Erik Janes’ groundout to Nunley kept him from doing permanent damage as well. By the bottom 7th, the Coons’ 3-0 lead appeared to be overpowered by the Indians having three aboard and nobody out. Faulk had led off with a single to left, and Huf had just walked the bags full after that against Cesar Martinez and Mike Rucker. Danny Morales chopped a ball at Claros for a double play, with Faulk scoring, but Huf haplessly went on to walk Justin Calhoun as well, leading to his removal and my investigation into what kind of furniture could most reasonably be fashioned from his dead skin. Billy Brotman replaced him to face left-handed pinch-hitter Tony Ruiz, who nevertheless hit an RBI single, cutting the lead to 3-2. Since the runners moved up during defensive confusion, the Coons intentionally walked Justin Jackson batting in the #9 hole to get Brotman to face Mendez, who flew to deep right, but Cookie was on top of that ball and ended the inning.

Support came from an unexpected angle in the eighth inning, in which Tony Delgado drew a leadoff walk before Daniel Bullock creamed a Brian Gilbert pitch for his second career home run, restoring the 3-run gap. LOOK AT THAT, SPENCER!! LOOK AT THAT!! … With Lillis having been battered around on Sunday, the Coons would try to patch the last two innings without him, lining up Surginer and Vince D for the job, although the save opportunity came off the board in the ninth thanks to singles by Nunley, Tovias, and Delgado plating the first in the procession. Angry at the missed opportunity, Devereaux would strike out the side in the bottom of the inning. 6-2 Coons. Nunley 2-5, 2B, RBI; Spencer 2-4; Bullock 2-4, BB, HR, 2 RBI;

Huf picked up the W, but walked six batters once more. He has 6.6 walks per nine innings, which is well worse than even last year during his rookie season, when he walked “only” 5.4 batters per nine, while tossing 80+ innings in both seasons. His ERA was also up almost a full run, and his 1.69 WHIP was untenable.

There were still no pitchers in AAA that would be striking alternatives…

Game 2
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – RF Newman – 3B Nunley – CF Stevenson – SS Stalker – C Tovias – P McKendrick
IND: C Calhoun – SS Janes – LF Faulk – RF C. Martinez – 1B M. Rucker – CF D. Morales – 2B Rolland – 3B J. Jackson – P Shumway

In a sign of a team held only together by matching cap insignia, McKendrick and Matt Nunley were in another’s fur as early as the first inning; Nunley first struck out with two aboard to end the top of the first, then misfielded an A.J. Faulk grounder trying to start a double play with Erik Janes coming from first base, much to his own dismay. When Mike Rucker hit a 2-out RBI single later in the inning, the rookie McKendrick quipped his relief that at least the run was unearned, which immediately led to Nunley bursting out from underneath his cap with matching insignia that if he wasn’t playing on the team with the most walks surrendered by its pitchers, he wouldn’t have to turn ****ing two all the time! McKendrick hissed, Nunley clawed at his eyes, and Tim Stalker and Jarod Spencer had considerable trouble keeping the two apart, while the Indians were watching on in bewilderment.

The next internal riot broke out in the third inning and involved the same pair. Spencer and Walter were in scoring position following Walter’s 1-out double up the rightfield line, his 30th two-base effort on the season. Will Newman ran a full count before popping out to short, but Nunley hit a 2-out, 2-run single to flip the score. Returning to the dugout after the inning and a job well done, he immediately let McKendrick know it. Soon enough a camera caught them rolling all over the dugout floor trying to snatch each other’s snack bucket, which included Tony Delgado, an older and wiser man, to carefully step over them on his way to the Gaytirade barrel. Nunley batted again with two on and one out in the fifth inning, but this time walked in a full count, shuffling his bum aboard in addition to Spencer (Jackson’s error) and Newman (intentional walk). Shumway was unhinged at this point, walking Stevenson on straight balls to push a run across, then plated another with a wild pitch that pulled Stalker’s legs out from underneath him, after which he was intentionally walked. Tovias walked, McKendrick struck out, stranding three in a 4-1 game. Stevenson made sure he’d walk between Nunley, who was left on third base, and McKendrick on the way back to the dugout.

McKendrick walked nobody after the first on-field incident and allowed only four hits in total to the Indians across seven innings, holding on to the 4-1 lead until he was hit for by Claros in the eighth inning. The Critters dared fate in the bottom 8th by sending Cory Dew into the 4-1 game along with his 7.15 ERA, with Calhoun immediately lashing a double. Janes also found a gap for an RBI double, leading to Dew’s removal. Kevin Surginer replaced him, but couldn’t keep the runner from scoring on a groundout and a flyout. The Indians even hit two 2-out singles off him via the bats of Mike Rucker and Danny Morales, but Jaylen Rolland struck out to keep them 4-3 behind. The Coons were working on an insurance run against Nick Salinas in the ninth, but Walter was thrown out at home plate on Will Newman’s 2-out double. At least Lillis retired the side in order… 4-3 Critters. Walter 2-4, 2B; Stalker 2-3, BB, 2B; McKendrick 7.0 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 0 ER, 1 BB, 0 K, W (5-6);

Game 3
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Graves – CF Stevenson – C Tovias – SS Stalker – P Gutierrez
IND: LF Faulk – 2B R. Mendez – 1B M. Rucker – CF D. Morales – 3B J. Jackson – C Calhoun – RF Genge – SS Matias – P A. Smith

Top of the first, Cookie walked, stole, and … was left on third base. Gutierrez walked the first batter he faced, with Matt Nunley silently screaming into his glove, but at least the runner Faulk was deleted by Tovias when he tried to take second base. Gutierrez would allow a single to Jackson in the second, but got Calhoun to hit sharply to short for a double play and was still facing the minimum when the Raccoons chalked a run to the board in the fifth inning. Stevenson had hit a leadoff single, had advanced on Elias Tovias’ groundout to Rucker, and then came home on Tim Stalker’s blooper to center that also fell for a single, but the 1-0 lead was soon enough negated by Justin Jackson’s homer in the bottom of the inning. Tovias’ 2-out single in the top 6th scored Shane Walter to break the 1-1 tie, and while the Indians had Faulk and Mendez on the corners after 1-out singles in the bottom 6th, Mike Rucker’s sharp bouncer to Spencer was good enough for two to end the inning. At that point, Gutierrez had six innings with no strikeouts, which put him in line to become the second Raccoons starter in a row to pitch at least six and not whiff anybody, not even the pitcher or an R.J. DeWeese equivalent. He batted for himself to start the top 7th, grounding out, so he still had a chance to either line up some K’s or get whacked into his eighth loss of the season. The former definitely didn’t happen, and the latter would depend on Vince D after Gutierrez walked Morales and conceded a single to Jackson to begin the bottom 7th. Losing Calhoun in a full count meant that Devereaux now pitched with three on and nobody gone. Genge’s sac fly tied the game, but Tony Ruiz hit into an inning-ending double play to Spencer, keeping the teams even at two after seven innings. The Coons were in business in the eighth inning through no fault of their own. Mike Rucker’s error put Graves aboard to begin the inning, and left-hander Mike Homa failed to play Stevenson’s bunt in any sensible way, allowing a leadoff single. Two on, no outs, which turned into nobody on, no outs in a real hurry when Elias Tovias hit an absolute BLAST to leftfield, 3-piece right off the bat, and this game was no longer tied! Cowen and Lillis made sure that the game would also not be tied again in the future, allowing only one runner between them. 5-2 Critters! Walter 2-4, BB; Tovias 2-4, HR, 4 RBI; Stalker 2-4, RBI; Gutierrez 6.0 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 0 K;

Well, this was a most unexpected sweep for either team, I guess.

We would utilize our upcoming off day(s) to skip Matt Huf for a start, which would work seamlessly given that we had both this Thursday and the Monday after the weekend off.

Raccoons (49-65) @ Pacifics (49-66) – August 11-13, 2023

Both teams were last in runs scored in their respective league, with the Pacifics having plated 18 more runs than the Raccoons at this point. Like the Coons, the Pacifics had no power, and overall the pitching was okay-ish for both teams. While the Coons had the second-worst rotation, but the second-best pen in their league, things were a bit more middling throughout for the Pacifics, who had won two of three from the Coons during the last meeting of the teams in 2022.

Projected matchups:
Travis Garrett (3-5, 3.05 ERA) vs. Vincent Alfaro (12-9, 3.34 ERA)
Jesus Chavez (7-11, 4.26 ERA) vs. Ernesto Lozano (7-10, 4.74 ERA)
Chris McKendrick (5-6, 3.08 ERA) vs. Matt McCabe (5-11, 3.52 ERA)

I hope “Tragic” Travis doesn’t consider himself too unlucky, because McCabe’s ERA and record look a whole lot more like active sabotage by his team mates. All three of their starters for this set were right-handed. In their pen they had ex-Coons in Logan Sloan (5.54 ERA as their closer) and Ricky Martinez.

Game 1
POR: RF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF Spencer – C Tovias – CF Stevenson – SS Stalker – P Garrett
LAP: RF Simmons – SS Hansen – CF M. Diaz – C Dehne – 2B Herman – 1B Gilmor – 3B Weber – LF J. Knight – P V. Alfaro

The Raccoons scratched out a 2-spot in the first inning, getting Cookie and Claros on with singles. Walter and Nunley both grounded out, but also both advanced the runners, which gave an RBI to Nunley, and then Spencer hit an RBI single. “Tragic” Travis opened his start with a customary walk, and would concede two singles and two more walks in the inning, including a 2-out, bases-loaded walk to Henry Weber to tie the game right away again. Cookie drew a walk in the third, stole second base, was driven in by Spencer with two outs, and the complete fool Garrett would blow that lead as well as soon as he could. Matt Dehne singled to left, advanced on a wild pitch (…) and was then singled in by Nick Gilmor, tying the game at three through three.

Not all the team’s misery was Garrett’s fault (though most was). When Stevenson and Stalker reached base to begin the fourth inning, Garrett bunted them over neatly, but Cookie’s pop and Claros’ whiff kept the runners stranded in scoring position. The rest of the middle innings was uneventful, even for Garrett, who struck out eight in 6.1 innings, but departed after issuing a fifth walk in the game, that one to speedy Justin Simmons, who had 20 stolen bases on the season. Kevin Surginer replaced Garrett at this point, and if you were willing to ignore the wild pitch he threw, Kevin did a good job of keeping the Pacifics away, striking out John Hansen and getting Mario Diaz to ground out to short, with the 3-3 tie persisting. Alfaro went eighth innings and whiffed as many for L.A. without winning a decision, either, and Logan Sloan struck out Stalker and Newman and got Cookie to ground out in the ninth. David Kipple was in the game in the bottom 9th. Henry Weber hit a first-pitch single before getting forced on a poor bunt by Michael Lefebure. The left-handed batter in the #9 hole would not bunt – he whacked a 400-footer to right center to end the game instead. 5-3 Pacifics. Claros 2-4; Spencer 2-4, 2 RBI; Surginer 1.1 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 3 K;

This loss sent the Coons to 49-66, nothing special, really. The Loggers and Titans were tied atop the division, 18 games ahead. The real spectacle was going on in Vancouver, with the Elks losing their 80th on that day, against only 35 wins.

It could still be so much worse.

Game 2
POR: RF Carmona – 2B Claros – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – LF Spencer – C Tovias – CF Stevenson – SS Stalker – P Chavez
LAP: RF Simmons – SS Hansen – CF M. Diaz – C Dehne – 2B Herman – 1B Gilmor – 3B Weber – LF Cesta– P Lozano

Lozano retired nobody, period. After walking Cookie to start the game, he waved for the trainer and vanished with him in the tunnel after a very brief conversation, leaving the Pacifics no option but to call a bullpen day. At least Rob Owensby got the team out of the inning without conceding the run, so Lozano would not take a bitter loss on top of suffering injury. Nope, it would be Chavez to concede the first run, walking former Titan Mike Cesta in the bottom 3rd and conceding the run on Simmons’ single to right after Owensby had bunted the runner to second base, putting himself in the lead after three scoreless innings of relief. Owensby would last four-plus, being removed after walking Stevenson to begin the fifth inning. Replacement Jesus Lopez immediately allowed a double to Tim Stalker, putting men in scoring position with nobody out. Chavez struck out, Cookie grounded back to the mound, and Raul Claros grounded to short. Only John Hansen’s slow play behind the second base bag allowed Claros to leg out that grounder, being called safe at first base, with Stevenson scoring to tie the score. Walter grounded out to Nick Herman to end the inning after that. Oh well, at least the Pacifics also stranded their runners in the bottom 5th, reaching the corners with one out. Jose Varela and Justin Simmons both struck out instead of driving in the go-ahead run. Injury would also claim the Pacifics’ John Hansen by the sixth inning, although insult remained with the Raccoons, who couldn’t peel more than six hits and a single ****ty run from the Pacifics’ overburdened bullpen across nine innings, and thus also failed to claim a lead in regulation. Of course there were always ways to make your lot even worse than you deserved. Chavez pitched eight innings of 1-run ball, with Vince D taking over business in the bottom 9th. He struck out Matt Dehne, and Nick Herman grounded out. Nick Gilmor, however, wouldn’t, sending a bouncer up the rightfield line and past Cookie for a 2-out triple. Before Henry Weber got a chance to fail, Devereaux would do so, ending the game with a wild pitch past a befuddled Elias Tovias… 2-1 Pacifics. Claros 2-4, RBI; Chavez 8.0 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 3 BB, 4 K;

Game 3
POR: LF Carmona – 2B Spencer – 1B Walter – 3B Nunley – RF Newman – C Delgado – SS Bullock – CF Santos – P McKendrick
LAP: RF Simmons – SS Hansen – CF M. Diaz – C Dehne – 2B Herman – 1B Gilmor – 3B Weber – LF J. Knight – P McCabe

The Pacifics made errors in both of the first two innings, but only the second one cost them dearly. The Raccoons had Bullock on second after walking, and Frank Santos at first after knocking a single up the middle (bravely chasing the .200 mark!) when McKendrick bunted. Weber, who had been a Gold Glover in 2018, unleashed a horrendous throw well over Nick Gilmor and into the stands that plated Bullock with the first run of the game and placed runners in scoring position. One of those runners, Santos, scored on a wild pitch, and McKendrick would come home on Spencer’s 2-out single after Cookie struck out. The Critters took a 3-0 lead, all runs unearned, but soon enough the Coons would rekindle the ugly flame still flickering from Tuesday night.

Nunley hit a leadoff double in the top of the third inning, and while Newman drew a walk, Delgado hit into a double play and Bullock was no help either, stranding Nunley on third base overall. In the bottom of the inning, McCabe knocked a clean single over the infielders into left to begin the frame, and on the first pitch, too. Simmons singled to right, putting runners on the corners, and when John Hansen rolled a ball between the mound and third base line, Nunley hustled in and made a bare-handed play at first base to kill Hansen, whose barking back was subdued with painkillers, but was surely slowing him down a wee bit. McCabe scored, much to McKendrick’s visible dismay, which irked Nunley again and he was right in the rookie’s face again, hissing at him that he should do his ****ing job and maybe strike out the opposing pitcher when he saw him – McKendrick had not gotten a strikeout in the Tuesday game, and he had none in this game so far, either. Shane Walter separated the two hagglers, leading to the next play on which Diaz reached on an infield single on a roller even slower than the previous one. Nunley had no chance playing that, but McKendrick still insisted he should hustle more. McKendrick himself had not made a move for the ball. Nunley glared at him, before knocking McKendrick’s hat off his head and calling him a skunk. This time, Delgado had to hold back McKendrick before it got really ugly. The pitching coach also got involved at this point, insisting that McKendrick stop fudging around here, but that advice was not heeded, either. The next three batters all reached base, with Dehne’s RBI single, a walk to Herman, and another RBI single by Gilmor. The last one tied the game. Weber struck out and Joe Knight lined out to Bullock to strand a full set of runners in a 3-3 game. The Pacifics claimed the lead the following inning on Mario Diaz’ 2-piece to left, and Weber’s double and Knight’s single scored another run off him in the fifth. The Knight single knocked him out of the game, with Cory Dew ending the fifth on the mound.

The sixth saw solo homers by both catchers to run the score from 6-3 to 7-4, with Dew surrendering Dehne’s dinger, but the Pacifics would wait to the seventh and Adam Cowen to completely tear a pitcher in half. Cowen got an out to start the inning against Weber, then retired absolutely nobody anymore. Three hits and two walks plated four additional runs for the Pacifics, with Hansen and Diaz plating two apiece with singles. Confused throws by the Raccoons also gave both of them extra bases they didn’t deserve. The Coons, battered and murdered in an 11-4 game, scored a run in the eighth off Jesus Pamatz when Santos, Stalker, and Cookie all reached with two outs, moving the score back to 11-5, which was, you know, cute; also, the final tally. 11-5 Pacifics. Santos 2-4;

In other news

August 7 – Blue Sox and Cyclones combine for no fewer than four half-innings of 4+ runs in a 13-11 whirlwind game that falls the Sox’ way eventually.
August 9 – BOS OF Adam Braun (.285, 4 HR, 57 RBI) hurt his shoulder on a throw and will miss up to six weeks with a shoulder strain.
August 12 – Boston SP Julio San Pedro (13-7, 3.21 ERA) sparkles in a 3-hit shutout over the Stars. The Titans win 7-0.
August 12 – TOP SP Carlos Marron (10-9, 3.36 ERA) will miss the rest of the season with an ankle injury.
August 13 – BOS SP Chris Klein (10-11, 2.91 ERA) and CL Ron Thrasher (3-4, 4.37 ERA, 27 SV) pitch a combined no-hitter in a 2-1 win over the Stars, who score an unearned run in the first inning thanks to a Matt Owen error that puts DAL SS Manny Ferrer (.265, 5 HR, 49 RBI) on second base with nobody out. This marks the second consecutive year that the Titans spin a combined no-hitter.

Complaints and stuff

The story that circulated in Twatbook and other social trivia this week that one Raccoon took a dump in a rookie teammate’s locker is absolutely not true, at all! … The feces weren’t even human – … or a raccoon’s, for that matter.

But I don’t think we’ve had a pitcher and a third baseman this crossed up and envious of the other’s stripes since Nick Brown and Ricardo Martinez, with roles reversed back then between the pitcher and third baseman.

ABL CAREER STOLEN BASE LEADERS
1st – Moromao Hino – 485
2nd – Diego Rodriguez – 460 – HOF
3rd – Martin Ortíz – 457
4th – Cristo Ramirez – 424 – HOF
5th – Daniel Silva – 417
6th – Danny Flores – 411 – active
7th – Pablo Sanchez – 398 – active
8th – Javier Rodriguez – 391
9th – Ricardo Carmona – 380 – active
10th – Piet Oosterom – 368 – active

I would not hold my breath on Cookie eventually reaching the Hall of Fame, by the way. He’s almost 32, he’s still not at 2,000 career hits (1,924 to be precise), and right now he plays like his body is ready to vomit out his soul just to be done with it all.

Also, we all know that WAR is a useless stat, but Cookie’s got 40.7 right now, including utter zero this year.

Finally, it can’t hurt to warm this up again: all of Cookie’s base hits have come with the Raccoons, and no player has ever landed 2,000 base hits as a Raccoon.

PORTLAND RACCOONS FRANCHISE HIT LEADERS
1st – Neil Reece – 1,983 – HOF
2nd – Ricardo Carmona – 1,924 – active
3rd – Daniel Hall – 1,886
4th – Ieyoshi Nomura – 1,581 – active
5th – Tetsu Osanai – 1,548 – HOF
6th – Matt Nunley – 1,490 – active
7th – Adrian Quebell – 1,400
8th – Mark Dawson – 1,313
9th – Daniel Sharp – 1,267
10th – Conceicao Guerin – 1,185

Would you have guessed that even a player as shady as Daniel Bullock is already in the franchise top 100? He is tied for 99th to be precise, with 169 base hits, knotted with Ramiro Cavazos, who played only one year in the brown shirt, in 2001, which brings us to…

Fun Fact: The Raccoons managed to play seven games and lose them all in the week ending August 10, 2003. Five of the losses were incurred by one run, including three 1-0 and 2-1 losses. The Raccoons amounted to 50 base hits in the seven games.

They also dropped into last place during that week, although they would finish a lofty fourth at the end of the year. Not quite sure how this team is supposed to reach fourth place. Maybe if the Indians fold?

The highlight reel from that week 20 years ago includes Marcos Bruno allowing not one, but two 3-run home runs in a single appearance, a 9-5 loss to the Falcons. That was on Tuesday. Saturday, Daniel Sharp and Jesus Palacios began the game with singles before Sharpie was caught in a rundown and Chris Beairsto (yuck!!) hit into a double play. Randy Farley sucked up his 1-0 loss early in the bottom 1st by allowing singles to Phil Montray, Mike Jones, then balking Montray to third and conceding the run on a Jesus Paraz sac fly. On Sunday, Bob Joly suffered the 2-1 loss to the Indians in the 12th inning; as we were out of other pitchers or even personnel (not seeing how Joly ever qualified as ‘pitcher’), we were forced to leave him in the game until he walked enough batters for the bags to spill over.