[Westheim]

Here comes the Raccoons Birthday edition. Will it be a reason to celebrate, or will this singspiel continue to make everybody's fur fall out?

Raccoons (49-50) @ Bayhawks (46-51) – July 23-25, 2030

The Baybirds were another crummy team in the South, which seemed to consist of almost only crummy teams, and the Condors that flattened all of them. They sat fifth in runs scored, seventh in runs allowed, which was all not really bad, but also not really good, and it really all looked a lot like the Coons, who came fresh off a double drubbing the previous week and were now not only a meh eighth in runs scored, but also only fifth in runs allowed anymore. The Coons led the season series 2-1.

Projected matchups:
Mark Roberts (10-4, 3.73 ERA) vs. Matt Huf (6-9, 4.29 ERA)
Dave Martinez (10-6, 3.76 ERA) vs. Gilberto Rendon (5-6, 3.20 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (4-7, 4.65 ERA) vs. Ben Lipsky (10-7, 4.36 ERA)

No southpaws in the Bayhawks’ rotation, so we only expected right-handers to crop up here.

Game 1
POR: SS Ramos – 2B Stalker – 3B Nunley – 1B Harenberg – LF Allan – RF Gomez – C Pizzo – CF Magallanes – P Roberts
SFB: LF Balado – SS Pulido – CF Hawthorne – C J. Wood – 1B Caraballo – 3B Myers – 2B J. Cruz – RF Pacheco – P Huf

San Fran’s Dave Myers gave a limb when he knocked up his elbow on Tim Stalker and second base to break up a double play in the second inning, which allowed the first run of the series opener across after Roberts had issued a leadoff walk to Jimmy Wood, a single to Myers, and those two were on the corners now with Jose Cruz grounding to Ramos. Stalker stood firm, but the Coons only got the second out of the inning, and Wood scored. Mike Martin replaced Myers and contributed a single in the fourth inning when Tomas Caraballo (single), Martin, and Cruz (walk) loaded the bases with nobody out. For once, the other team choked; Roberts, who had no whiffs at that point, rung up Vincent Pacheco and Matt Huf – and remember the two had been traded for another and three other players – and Jose Balado lined out softly to Stalker to strand all the runners in what was still a 1-0 game and in which the Critters had zero base hits. Through five innings, Matt Huf had issued three walks, and two of them had been erased on double plays, and when Magallanes opened the sixth with a four-pitch walk squeezed out of Huf, Roberts bunted into the team’s third double play of the contest. …

The Raccoons would not get no-hit; Alberto Ramos lobbed a single over Caraballo after the Roberts double play, stole second, and was stranded when Jose Pulido handled Stalker’s easy-as-pie grounder. Stalker also withered another impact, this time Jose Cruz’ on another broken-up double play. Cruz was carted off in favor of Jonathan Morales, which was one way to empty a team’s bench. To anybody’s surprise, Portland tied the score at one in the seventh inning, courtesy of a Harenberg double and Ryan Allan’s RBI single. Roberts received no decision, walking Wood and Caraballo with two outs in the seventh before getting yanked for Fleischer, who got Martin to roll over to Stalker. The inevitable loss would hang on Surginer, who allowed a single to Morales, a pinch-hit double to Victor Ayala that was enough to get Morales around to score, and that was way too much offense to concede to the opposing team. The Raccoons ended up with three measly hits. 2-1 Bayhawks.

Game 2
POR: SS Ramos – LF Allan – 3B Nunley – 1B Harenberg – 2B Hereford – C Tovias – RF Rodriguez – CF Magallanes – P Martinez
SFB: LF Balado – CF Hawthorne – 1B Caraballo – C J. Wood – SS Pulido – RF Pacheco – 3B M. Martin – 2B Quantrille – P G. Rendon

The Coons had a double play by the second inning, that one being on Tovias erasing Hereford to end the inning, and the Bayhawks had a man on second base with two outs in the bottom 2nd after a leadoff walk to Jose Pulido, who had been forced out by Pacheco, then got a single from Jeremy Quantrille, and RBI single by Rendon, another RBI single by Balado, and a 2-run single by Hawthorne to bury the dismal Coons four runs deep. Portland took their sweet time to rally. Their rally got started when Rich Hereford got… nailed? … in the fifth? … and it ended when Tovias chopped into his second double play, keeping Rendon to the minimum batters faced through five.

Tomas Caraballo hit a solo jack off Martinez to saddle him with a final tally of five runs in the sixth inning, which Martinez completed. Stalker drew a 2-out walk in his place in the top 7th, didn’t get picked off, so the Coons broke out of the vicious cycle of bringing up merely the minimum. Ramos grounded out to keep them to a snuff +1. He got the rest of the day off and Stalker remained at short, which meant that Stalker was back up in the top of the seventh after the Coons had suddenly found the sticks. Nunley walked, Hereford singled, and Tovias(!) doubled both of them in with a fly over George Hawthorne. Rodriguez and Pizzo also reached base to load them up with two down for Stalker… but he flew out to Hawthorne. Steve Costilow allowed a run in his second inning in the bottom 7th, making it a 6-2 game, and the Raccoons looked really lost until Harenberg hit a leadoff jack off ex-Coon Dan McLin to begin the ninth inning. Now it was a save opportunity, so the Baybirds went to righty Marcus Owens, who walked nearly five per nine innings. Hereford grounded out, Tovias walked, and then Owens axed both Wilson Rodriguez and Rafael Gomez to end the game. 6-3 Bayhawks. Hereford 2-3;

(flicks off the TV and turns his wheelchair over to face Cristiano Carmona) Say, Cristiano… don’t you sometimes just want… just want to … fly away? To somewhere nice?

Game 3
POR: SS Ramos – CF Allan – 3B Nunley – 1B Harenberg – LF Hereford – 2B Stalker – C Pizzo – RF Rodriguez – P Gutierrez
SFB: LF Balado – SS Pulido – CF Hawthorne – C J. Wood – 1B Caraballo – 3B Jon. Morales – 2B Sears – RF Pacheco – P Lipsky

Harenberg’s double that scored Ramos in the first inning gave the Coons their first lead of the week, and it was merely Thursday. Rico Gutierrez, who had been pummeled brashly in his recent outings, retired the first six, then shed singles to Micah Sears and Pacheco to begin the bottom 3rd, but pounced on Lipsky’s hard bunt to turn a 1-5-3 double play, and that helped him to escape the inning. Maybe it was the Coons’ turn to win one! Maybe padding that 1-0 lead would be smart, too. When Rico and Ramos hit leadoff singles in the fifth I was so giddy I for once forgot the itching leg cast that had me laid up in the wheelchair. Allan lined out to short, but Rico stayed put on the bag and the Bayhawks couldn’t double anybody off. Nunley walked, bringing up Harenberg with three on and one out. Kevin ran a full count and then was almost taken out by the sixth pitch for an obvious bases-loaded walk, pushing home the Critters’ second run. Rich Hereford added two with a fly to left that Balado gruesomely overran into a 2-run double, but we were at a point of putrid where that couldn’t make me like it less. Stalker lined out, but Pizzo shoved a 2-out, 2-run double through Caraballo, completing a Coons 5-spot to extend the lead to 6-0! A FIVE-spot! In ONE game!! Cristiano, did you see it?? – Stop playing on your phone and watch the game with me, goddamnit!

The scoring for Portland ceased, but the scoring for the Baybirds never got started. For once the stars aligned for Rico Gutierrez to pitch a strong game, and the Bayhawks never got to him through eight innings of shutout ball. They had two singles in the seventh, but that was really it; that was as close as they got. Gutierrez was finished after eight though on account of 109 pitches; Chris Wise took over and completed a combined 5-hit shutout. 6-0 Coons. Ramos 3-5; Pizzo 2-4, 2 RBI; Gutierrez 8.0 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 4 K;

By the way, it may not look like it’s likely, but Kevin Harenberg now actually leads the CL in RBI with 66.

Raccoons (50-52) vs. Falcons (47-53) – July 26-28, 2030

No offense was also the credo of the Falcons, who sat second from the bottom in runs in the CL, and were also in the bottom three in runs allowed. The entire package was thoroughly bottomish and they were arguably winning more games than they should. Despite their shortcomings, they had so far still managed a 3-3 split in the season series.

Projected matchups:
Tom Shumway (4-11, 4.22 ERA) vs. Ed Hague (6-6, 4.31 ERA)
Juan Barzaga (0-0) Vs. Chris Rountree (8-10, 5.39 ERA)
Mark Roberts (10-4, 3.61 ERA) vs. Jesus Chavez (6-5, 3.38 ERA)

Southpaw on Saturday to oppose call-up unperishable 33-year-old righty Juan Barzaga, who had a 1.13 ERA out of the pen in St. Pete this year, his 14th as a professional in this organization, and the sixth in which he would get a sniff of major league air. So far, Barzaga had appeared in 48 games (5 starts) in the majors for a 4-4 record and 5.13 ERA. He replaced Steve Costilow (12.60 ERA) on the roster, who had allowed a run in two innings against San Francisco.

Game 1
CHA: CF N. Nelson – C Cooper – LF Salto – RF Kok – 3B G. Ortiz – 1B J. Elliott – SS Wagner – 2B Ra. Mendez – P Hague
POR: SS Ramos – CF Allan – 3B Nunley – 1B Harenberg – LF Hereford – 2B Stalker – C Pizzo – RF Gomez – P Shumway

Greg Ortiz put Charlotte on top with a 2-out, 2-run double in the first, with Shumway looking like random litter on the street right from the start. Single here, walk there, and – bam!! – it was already 2-0 for the other team. But in a stunning move, the Critters took the lead in the same inning; Ramos got on with a walk, as did Nunley with a double, but it wasn’t enough to plate Alberto. Harenberg scored Ramos with a single to center, but Hereford struck out. However, Tim Stalker hit a gapper, and with two outs and some tardiness in the outfield, the Raccoons were able to send Harenberg all the way around to score on a score-flipping 2-out, 2-run double! Pizzo struck out, leaving the 3-2 lead to Shumway, who did not explode on contact. Gomez got a leadoff walk in the bottom 2nd, was bunted over and scored on Ramos’ single, 4-2, and the Coons threw out Barend Kok at home plate on a 2-out Ortiz double to keep the Falcons down. Stalker actually added a second RBI double in that inning, plating Hereford to extend the tally to 5-2 in the bottom 3rd. Nothing good happened in the fourth, but the bottom 5th saw Nunley (double), Harenberg (single), and Hereford (walk) all reach base to begin the inning. That was three on, no outs, so probably nothing good would happen again. Stalker hit a sac fly, and that was indeed it. Pizzo grounded out, the runners moved up, that took the bat away from Rafael Gomez, and Shumway struck out to strand three in a 6-2 game.

Shumway lasted seven on six hits and no further runs, but the Falcons had a few doubles to at least make it interesting in between. Matt Jamieson batted for him with two outs and Stalker and Pizzo in scoring position and grounded out to Greg Orti, but at least Jamieson was back in action after having to sit out all of this week so far with back woes. The Coons went on to get two outs from Brotman and one from Fleischer in the eighth, Harenberg tacked on a run with an RBI double that drove home Allan against Josh Pillsbury in the bottom 8th, and Fleischer continued in the 7-2 game… and then it came to a screeching halt. Base hits by John Elliott and Curt Wagner, a 4-pitch walk to Raul Mendez, and suddenly there were three on and nobody out. Ricky Ohl came on and conceded a run on PH Dave Trahan’s groundout, got Nate Nelson to pop out, but then allowed an RBI single to Matt Cooper that got the Falcons even closer… but Graciano Salto struck out. 7-4 Raccoons. Ramos 2-4, BB, RBI; Nunley 2-5, 2 2B; Harenberg 3-5, 2B, 2 RBI; Stalker 2-2, BB, 2 2B, 4 RBI; Shumway 7.0 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 4 K, W (5-11);

Jonathan Fleischer’s ERA is now over five. We do not like this development.

Game 2
CHA: CF N. Nelson – SS Wagner – LF Salto – RF Kok – 3B G. Ortiz – 1B J. Elliott – C T. Perez – 2B Cano – P Rountree
POR: 2B Baldwin – 3B Nunley – SS Stalker – 1B Harenberg – RF Gomez – LF Jamieson – C Tovias – CF Rodriguez – P Barzaga

Scratch starter Juan Barzaga lined up to zeroes on the board before it all went to hell again. Chris Rountree fittingly opened the top 3rd with a sharp single, and soon enough Nate Nelson walked and Graciano Salto fired a 3-run homer to left. John Elliott would also single home Barend Kok in the same inning, putting the Raccoons in yet another 4-0 hole. The Coons had yet to awaken, but got Rodriguez aboard to begin the bottom 3rd and with two outs Matt Nunley socked a homer to left-center to cut the gap to 4-2. The following inning nobody was able to help Harenberg around the bases after a leadoff walk, and in turn Barend Kok extended the score to 5-2 with a homer off Barzaga in the fifth. That was the last inning for nobody’s fifth-through-eleventh choice for a starting pitcher, and the Coons progressed through two innings from Chris Wise and no offense before Billy Brotman got into the eighth inning. He got a leadoff grounder from Barend Kok to first, but dropped Harenberg’s throw for an error. Ortiz singled, and then Elliott grounded to Baldwin, who fed to Stalker… and Stalker dropped the sure-as-heck double play grounder. That error loaded them up with nobody out. Tony Perez hit a 2-run double off the fence, leading to Brotman being yanked without logging any out when he could have gotten three, and we raised the white flag with Sean Rigg inhering nobody out and runners in scoring position in a 7-2 game. Ironically, he stranded the runners on a Ricky Cano pop, a soft fly to shallow right that Gomez caught off Travis Adkins’ bat, and then a Nelson grounder to Nunley. But even that performance inspired nobody and the Raccoons went down without coming even close to another run. 7-2 Falcons. Allan (PH) 1-1; Wise 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 3 K; Rigg 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K;

Maud, if we lose another series to a ****ty team, I want you to push me down the stairs. – Wait, why do you agree to that so fast!?

Game 3
CHA: CF N. Nelson – C Cooper – LF Salto – RF Kok – 3B G. Ortiz – 1B J. Elliott – SS Wagner – 2B Cano – P J. Chavez
POR: SS Ramos – 2B Stalker – 3B Nunley – 1B Harenberg – RF Hereford – LF Jamieson – C Pizzo – CF Magallanes – P Roberts

Singles hit past either wing of Ricky Cano by the 7-8 hitters with two down in the bottom 2nd allowed Rich Hereford to come around to score after drawing a 1-out walk off the former Critter Chavez, the first run in the game. Roberts struck out to strand the pair on base. Bottom 3rd, Ramos drew a leadoff walk and was caught stealing, and in the top of the fourth Cano got his revenge against a confused Roberts missing left and right and throwing tons of pitches for no greater good and drove home John Elliott with a 2-out double to right. Better for Charlotte yet, Chavez chucked a single to center to move Cano around, putting the Falcons up 2-1. That also made Chavez 2-for-2 in the game…

Roberts needed 91 pitches through five innings, doling out six hits and three walks, and running many long counts overall. The rest of the Coons were absolutely no help at all. Hereford hit a rather lonely double in the fourth, Magallanes got on to begin the fifth, and neither batter was brought around to score. Roberts was done after six, while Harenberg dropped a leadoff single in the bottom 6th. Hereford popped out, Jamieson singled, Pizzo grounded out. With the tying and go-ahead run in scoring position, the Critters sent Ryan Allan to bat for Magallanes, even though neither of them were actually hitting anything right now. The Falcons put Allan on intentionally to bring up the pitcher’s spot, where Rafael Gomez hit for Roberts, coming off a dire bench. Chavez fell to 2-0, threw a wild pitch, and that one tied the score at two. FINE. Whatever works…! Gomez two pitches later knocked a liner up the leftfield line, it got past Salto, and the Coons took the lead on the 2-out, 2-run double, 4-2, before Ramos flew out to Nelson in center. Surginer pitched a clean seventh, Hereford doubled home Nunley for a fifth run in the bottom of that inning, and maybe we’d escape the week at least even? Garavito got around an Elliott single in the eighth, and the Coons got another run in the bottom of that inning. Baldwin pinch-hit for Pizzo to begin the inning and doubled off lefty Doug Clifford, moved up on Allan’s grounder, then scored on an uncaught third strike to Elias Tovias, who reached first base. WHATEVER WORKS. With a 6-2 lead, Fleischer rather than Ohl got the ninth inning, which already had not worked out so well once in this series, but Ricky Cano started the ninth with a grounder to short for the first out, which – fun fact – were already more outs than Fleischer had grabbed on Friday… Trahan grounded out, too, and Nelson got rung up to end the game. 6-2 Coons. Hereford 2-3, BB, 2 2B, RBI; Baldwin (PH) 1-1, 2B; Magallanes 2-2, RBI; Gomez (PH) 1-1, 2B, 2 RBI;

In other news

July 22 – TOP SP David Elliott (9-6, 3.09 ERA) pitches a 2-hit shutout in a 7-0 win over the Stars.
July 23 – VAN OF Brian Wojnarowski (.295, 17 HR, 63 RBI) is going to miss a month with an intercostal strain.
July 25 – The Capitals get routed, 11-0, by the Gold Sox, with DEN SP Robbie Blair (8-6, 4.53 ERA) going the distance with a 3-hit shutout.
July 26 – RIC SP Gabriel Lara (4-7, 4.31 ERA, 1 SV) 2-hits the Stars in a 6-0 Rebels victory.
July 26 – BOS SP Greg Gannon (11-7, 3.42 ERA) strikes out ten against only three base hits in a 9-0 shutout of the Bayhawks.
July 28 – Legend TOP RF/LF Pablo Sanchez (.346, 3 HR, 45 RBI) reaches the 3,500 hits plateau with a third-inning single off Denver’s Joel Trotter (8-3, 4.02 ERA) in the Buffaloes’ 10-9 loss to the Gold Sox. Sanchez, age 36, who was in his first season with Topeka after 17 years with Sacramento, is a 4-time batting champion, 3-time Player of the Year, 13-time All Star, and career .345 batter with 125 HR and 1,323 RBI and is indisputably a lock for a first-ballot Hall of Famer.
July 28 – The Stars trade LF/RF/1B Mike Chaplin (.277, 8 HR, 54 RBI) to the Bayhawks for three prospects.
July 28 – Salem picks up SP Brian Frain (6-9, 3.98 ERA) from the Blue Sox in exchange for two prospects.

Complaints and stuff

What shall I say? Not for the first time this year we played two crummy teams – the CL is full of ‘em – and came out 3-3, barely. What does that say about us?

There is not likely to be a trade at the deadline. There is no point in us shelling out our good pitching prospects now for more 3-month rentals and everybody will then leave after the season. There is too much wrong with the “proven veteran” on the roster to keep patching holes.

Although, truth be told, with the way the Elks and Indians can’t get going, there is still an outside chance that we make the playoffs purely by accident. But I would not bet on it. And even if we make it, the Condors will send us straight to the glover's shop.

Matt Nunley is still seven short of the 1,000 RBI mark thanks to a terrible offensive week from the team. It was not necessarily Nunley – he batted only 4-for-19, but also drew six walks with mostly nobody on base. Three of the four hits were for extra bases, including the 2-piece on Saturday. And THAT came in a loss. What do I want to say? His OPS went up three points this week, so I don’t blame him.

Oh, Mena! – Mena! – How much longer do I have to wear this cast? I am itching, and my leg doesn’t feel all that bad! – What do you mean, an injured man *my age* needs lots of rest??

Fun Fact: Pablo Sanchez is only the fifth player to reach the 3,500 hits mark, and the first such player who’s career started in the 21st century.

He is not the first Sanchez, though. Victorino Sanchez still leads the all-time hits chart with 4,083 knocks. Dale Wales reached 3,673. Cristo Ramirez had 3,625. And Jeffery Brown reached as far as 3,582. Brown (1981-2000) opposed us in all those Capitals World Series in the 1990s, but Ramirez is the only one of the bunch that spent the majority of his career in our division, with the Loggers.

The career top 10 are completed by Sonny Reece (3,294), Antonio Esquivel (3,263), Martin Ortíz (3,220), Alberto Rodriguez (3,172), and Dennis Berman (3,098) – all of these are in the Hall of Fame, except for (obviously) Pablo Sanchez and also Rodriguez, who somehow got only 32.7% of the vote in his first year on the ballot last winter.

By the way, in 11th place with 3,050 career hits? Yoshi Nomura! He lasted 23 seasons, 12 of those with the Coons (across two stints), and we also claim 1,581 hits, more than half his total.