The Yellow Table Lamp with Anne, Rex, and George
A: Good evening baseball fans and the hopefully romantic. This is your host Anne Hargraves presenting to you WRVR’s “The Yellow Table Lamp,” the most exciting radio show for Week 5 of the Commonwealth Baseball League Series of the Week. Today we saw the Railroad League’s Diamond City Swatters win the series over the Shaw High School Knuckle Punchers with a 12-7 win at the Great Green Jewel. Rex, what did you think of the series?
R: First, my dearest Anne, I want to expatiate--
G: Let's not do that!
R:--on our mental state and the state of baseball in the Neuschwanstein of the Commonwealth. Firstly, as the fog of our cerebral cortex from a bender of Jet, Psycho, Vodka, Rum, Mentats, and Battery Acid dissolves, we watched two teams treading more water than a ghoul in power armor. In fact, our experience with baseball has been with the Norman Thomases rather than the Herbert Hoovers. These two squads of dilapidation appear to be battling with the bear mutants of Fairline Hill Estates for the crown of sewerage overspill.
G: I am not entirely sure what you're saying, Rex, but it sounds like you don't care for either team.
R: George, if crows had voices, they would caw-caw at the quality of these two accumulations of uniforms and ineptitude.
A: What is your take on the weekend, Rex?
R: I agree with Rex, I think. Both teams are disappointing, though it seemed as though they could be competitors in the Railroad League.
A: OK, well, let's wrap this up then with awards for the week. Rex, you're first.
R: Anne, the Sportiest Sport of this week, the player showing the most pizzazz within the ball game is none other than Diamond City second baseman Danny Suarez. In his team's two comeback victories, the honorable Suarez swatted doubles for runs batted in. He is indeed the Sportiest Sport.
G: For my award, the top pitcher of the weekend goes to the Swatters' third pitcher, Danny Owens, who gave up only two earned runs in today's pitching performance. Other than Shaw's Nick Mutfruit, Owens was a top pitcher.
A: And I will give out the Outstanding Player Award. That is going to be DC right fielder Wayne Lacy. He hit a double and two home runs on the weekend. He also scored four times and drove in six runs.
R: That is an impressive performance.
A: That's right, Rex, and that is why Lacy is our Outstanding Player of the Week.
We are now going to conclude "The Yellow Table Lamp." I am Anne Hargraves of the Charles River Trio, this week's host. Please join us during the week as we move into Chapter 2 of our drama, "The Barrel of Amontillado."
For Rex and George, see you next week as we stay in the Railroad League and travel to Graygarden to watch the Diamond City Swatters again as they visit the Oberland T-51s. Now let's listen to the Stan Kenton and Nat King Cole classic, "Orange-Colored Sky":
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdi97HHYJew