Today in the CBO
News and Notes - Reports from around the Commonwealth
by Nat Wright-Kowalski
19 December 2296 – JP Pitcher Not Going Soft
Jamaica Plain Red Rockets pitcher Chris Teddybear was the most successful a pitiful pitching staff in 2296. He finished the season 7-10 with a 6.55 ERA. Though he was the second pitcher behind ace Will Rope, Teddybear vowed that he wants to be more than fluff.
The pitcher has used the offseason to work out with new pitching coach Lance Okolita every day. Teddybear credits Okolita with showing him new ways to deliver his fastball and vows to up his numbers from 72 strikeouts in 115.1 innings pitched, a low rate of 5.6 strikeouts per nine innings.
“I am concentrating not on volume,” Teddybear said, “but being able to deliver the ball in a way where hitters just aren’t ready for it.”
Okolita worked some as a traveling coach before joining the CBO this offseason. His philosophy is to show pitchers how to pitch harder and to blow fastballs past hitters.
“Chris has shown me two things so far since I joined Jamaica,” Okolita said. “He is willing to work and he has the talent to get better. He’s sharp, and I’m not just talking about the combat knife in his pocket.”
Teddybear is considered to be among the leaders of the Red Rockets. New manager Mark Sellsword has said better pitching will go a long way in making the team more successful.
“We’re looking to generate runs on offense and keep numbers down on defense,” Sellsword said. “Half of that battle will be getting Will and Chris to strike out a lot more batters per game.”
19 December 2296 – Warwick Minor Leaguer Tries New Diet
Warwick Mirelurks pitcher Dave Kovalenko has experienced disappointment so far in his young baseball career. Having gone undrafted in the 2296 Inaugural Draft, Kovalenko was not initially signed by a team after the draft either. Ten days later, he was called out to Warwick Homestead where he got a tryout with the Mirelurks. He was signed but never got off the reserve roster all season.
Kovalenko decided that was not good enough. Considered a health freak, Kovalenko tried various regimes and diets throughout the season hoping to gain an edge. Now he thinks he has found that edge.
“I got a hold of a few consumables from a seller out of Far Harbor,” Kovalenko said. “It’s a mash up of aster, lure weed, and cave fungus. I dry it out and add it to my meals. I feel like it’s really going to give me a boost in my baseball career.”
So far, Kovalenko said he tried a few fad diets and exercise regimes—the Cat-O Diet, the Pale Ale Diet, the Meat Diet, and the County Crossing Fit exercise regime—but nothing made him a better baseball player.
“Nobody is doing this new diet. I think I’ll call it the Kova Diet.”
We’ll see if the Kova Diet works and if it will then catch on. I will say that smelling the powder he makes reminds me of wet leather and crusty underwear. Smells delicious, or not.
21 December 2296 – Vault 81 Pitcher Injured by Blast
Vault 81 Dwellers starter Godfather Hough has suffered minor injuries after an incident that killed his pet brahmin, Puffy Puffy Passie, at the players’ living quarters near the Charles River.
It is unclear what exactly caused the explosion, but a team of Brotherhood explosives experts will be dispatched to the area to investigate. The explosion is not considered accidental. Hough will also need to answer questions.
According to Hough, “I was sleeping in my bed. I hear an explosion, and the next thing I know is Puffy Puffy Passie’s severed head is in the bed with me. It was unreal.”
Asked about his injuries, Hough only said that he had a few schrapnel injuries and a busted nose from the impact of his brahmin’s head smacking him in the face.