Today in the CBO
News and Notes - Reports from around the Commonwealth
by Nat Wright-Kawolski
8 July 2298 - Sphinx Stumped by Riddle
Starlight Lady Killers Justin Sphinx was permanently kicked out of the Puzzlers Club at Hubris Comics West in Fort Hagen after he was not happy with being "picked on" by the members there.
Curious about what members of the Puzzlers Club did, Sphinx attended a meeting last night while the Lady Killers prepare for their important weekend series at third-place Fort Hagen.
When Sphinx joined, the members waited for hi answer asked by the club president and assistant manager of Hubris Comics West, Emeril Nigma. According to Nigma, Sphinx became distraught when he could not answer the riddle and kept yelling out, "Why are you picking on me?" as he overturned game tables and magazine racks.
"Very bizarre behavior," Nigma said. "He said he was named Sphinx, so I thought he would appreciate my question.
"What was my question? What goes on four feet in the morning, two feet at noon, and three feet in the evening? I thought he would appreciate that one. Boy, oh boy, was I wrong!"
There is no discipline expected, but Sphinx is not welcome to any club events again. He is also expected to pay for damages to equipment and stock.
8 July 2298 - FHE Yao Guai Ship Moss to Abernathy
Done deal! The FHE Yao Guai have agreed to send 33-year-old RHP Hercules Moss to the Abernathy Adamantium for 24-year-old 3B Jerry Leftnut and 20-year-old C Poppt Person. The trade, rumored for days, was completed in the wee hours this morning.
Moss has taken the mound for 26 relief appearances this season, nailing down no saves while notching a 0-3 record with a 7.80 ERA. The reliever has limited opposing batters to a .310 batting average.
On the year Leftnut has hit .313 with no home runs, 2 RBIs and scored 2 runs.
8 July 2298 - Penaltybox Whitewashes Radstags
Joe Penaltybox came out firing strikes and when the game ended, the Abernathy Adamantium hurler had struck out 8, leading Abernathy past the Concord Radstags, 9-0. Penaltybox allowed just 2 hits in the ballgame.
"I'm glad that one is in the rearview mirror," said Concord manager Mark Gourdroot.
This year Penaltybox has recorded a 8-5 mark. In 17 starts he has fanned 87 batters in 114.1 innings with a 4.33 ERA.
8 July 2298 - Udder Goes Distance in 6-1 Win
Matt Udder pitched a gem to lead Oberland to victory over the Vault 81 Dwellers, 6-1. Oberland leads the South Charles Association Railroad League by 17½ games.
Udder allowed 1 run on 2 hits over 9 innings for the T-51s. He walked 1 and struck out 6.
"We'll relax tonight and enjoy this win," said Udder.
Jeremy Bugs was the best hitter for the T-51s. He was 2 for 4 with a home run, two runs scored, and an RBI.
8 July 2298 - Hancocks Stomp Cats, 16-3
The Goodneighbor Hancocks powered past the Atom Cats, 16-3, at Coolest Field in Town. Zachary Utsinger was 4 for 5 with a triple, a double, 2 singles, and a walk, while scoring 2 runs and driving in 3, to lead the charge. Oscar Chekhemani got the win, improving to 1-0. He pitched 8 innings, giving up 7 hits and 3 runs, while striking out 4 and walking 2. The Hancocks have now won 6 straight.
Early in the game, Utsinger had a 2-run double for Goodneighbor. It was his 21st double of the season and put the Hancocks on top, 2-0.
"I like our mindset right now," said Goodneighbor manager Jeremy Whiteplate.
8 July 2298 - Dimes Now 8-7 After Subduing Lady Killers
Starting pitcher Joey Dimes took care of business, helping the Fort Hagen Silver Shroud stifle the Starlight Lady Killers, 3-2. With the victory, the Silver Shroud upped their record to 36-30.
Dimes, the winner, is now 8-7 after putting the clamps on the Starlight offense. In 8 innings of work, he gave up 1 run on 3 hits, while collecting 6 Ks.
"We can always improve and get better, but we're feeling confident after that win," said Dimes.
Micah Morals led the Shroud offense. He was 2 for 3 with a double, a run, and an RBI.
8 July 2298 - Streaking Ghouls Win Another One, 5-4
The The Slog Ghouls turned back the Nordhagen Beach Party Boys, 5-4, at Tarberry Field Forever. Boots Yellowhair, in particular, had a fine performance. He was 2 for 3 with a home run and a double. He drove in 3 runs and scored once. The triumph puts The Slog at 37-29 for the season after winning their 6th straight.
Chipping in for The Slog was pitcher David Kiwi. He stroked a run-scoring single in the bottom of the fourth. For the game, Kiwi threw 7 innings allowing 4 runs.
"I'm not out there for personal accomplishments," Kiwi told a The Slog Citizen reporter after the game. "I'm out there to help the team win, and that's what we did today."
8 July 2298 - Extra-Inning Walk-Off Win for Mirelurks Put Them in 2nd Place Tie
The Warwick Mirelurks did just enough to secure a victory over the Quincy Gunners, 5-4, at The Homestead. Nobody did more than first baseman Straight QuaLiTy. Pem Pollack earned the win after being summoned from the bullpen. The right-hander allowed no runs on no hits in 2 innings. His record is now 6-2. Quincy's current losing streak has reached 4 games.
The Mirelurks procured the win, in large part because of shortstop Tumble Lastman. In the bottom of the tenth, he produced the game-winning run-scoring single.
"It's great to see the crowd jacked up," QuaLiTy said.