Not a lot happening, so a few stories before a little creativity.
Today in the CBO
News and Notes - Reports from around the Commonwealth
by Nat Wright-Kawolski
13 November 2299
Rookie, Meet Deathclaw
Nothing says welcome to the CBO like a little thrashing from a Deathclaw on your way to the team facilities. That happened to Finch Farm Four Leafs 5th-round draft pick Stole Greeson as he left a stay in his hometown of Brockton on his way to Finch Farm for a uniform fitting and rookie camp.
Greeson and the caravan he was with found a lone deathclaw in their path. The creature attacked, killing one crew member. Greeson was injured when the deathclaw swiped him with its tail while he was stabbing it from behind with a Chinese officer's sword.
According to a statement from Four Leafs GM Nick "Gunner" Jones, "We received word that Stole was attacked by a deathclaw. We heard that he is in Quincy Hospital getting treatments for his injuries but that he can join our team by the end of the month. He does not have any severe injuries."
Greeson was a 5th-round pick out of the Cape Cod Youth League where he played for the West Dennis Menaces and had a 7-2 record in 13 starts there with a 1.47 ERA. He has a great fastball that reaches 96 MPH, with a good cutter. He does have some control issues and relied on bad at bats to pick up many of his strikeouts. He will need to change that tendency to have a chance to make it to the CBO. The OSA also listed on his scouting report that he is "a legend in his own mind."
15 November 2299
Quincy Gunners Ship Derp to Roxbury
It's all done except the paperwork. The Quincy Gunners and the Roxbury Knuckle Punchers have agreed to a trade that will send 27-year-old minor league 3B Dan Derp and 22-year-old RHP Walt Barbed to Roxbury, while 34-year-old RHP Plow Holdgun will be shipped to Quincy. GM Gunner Sprague of the Gunners described the trade talks as "quick and easy."
"We're glad to get this deal done. We think it's something that helps our ball club and it didn't take too long at all to sort this one out," he said.
Holdgun has no saves during his career with a 1-1 record and a 5.68 ERA.
20 November 2299
Kilgore Disappointed in Rejection
Egret CF Kurt Kilgore has been trying his hand at a new hobby, poetry. Today he received bad news from the League of Extraordinary Poets that his entry into their club does not hold merit.
Kilgore entered a three-lined poem that he titled, "Tupelo." It reads, "When the tupelo / Goes poop-a-lo / I'll come back to youp-a-lo."
The letter from the League was a scathing review of his work. Kilgore allowed Publick Occurrences to provide an excerpt:
"This has to be the worst poem to ever cross our review board. What is a 'tupelo'? Also, you cannot just make up words to make a rhyme. You are no Magnolia! . . . Please do us the honor of never submitting a poem to our League again. It would be too soon to read your works."
According to Kilgore, he considered entering another poem, but thought it would go over the League's head because they may not know what high school is. He calls it, "16." It reads, "Roses are red, / And ready for plucking, / You're sixteen, / And ready for high school."
Kilgore said that he will not let the League's rejection affect him. According to Kilgore, "It's back to the writing board, et cetera."
21 November 2299
Knuckle Punchers No More
The Roxbury Knuckle Punchers have officially announced today in an unveiling ceremony that they will no longer be the Knuckle Punchers but have changed their team nickname to the Rad Sox. They uncovered banners around Atomatoys Stadium at Roxbury today and modeled their new uniforms and stadium banner (shown below).
According to team owner Arlen Glass, "We feel new and better things coming to our team. As a way to honor the Boston Commonwealth with a nod to the pre-War team and express our state of life today, we are now known as the Rad Sox. We feel this will boost our team to even more success than Toyland! Our future is now!"
Glass also announced that the Mole Rats logo and name were for sale to any minor league team that would want it. They are also renaming their minor league affiliate, Forest Grove, to the Knuckle Punchers, or may even consider a similar name with the Knuckle Punchers logo. That final decision will be made by January 1 when the new league year begins.