I have only made it to the third inning of last night's game outrageously shoved onto Crapple TV Plusminus Whatever-I-Don't-Give-A-****, and as if being down 1-0 to the Rangers is not enough, if that broadcast crew fawns about baseballs for kids one more time, I'm gonna - ... uh...
I don't have much leverage, do I?
I could go on a bit about how the lady broadcasters are shaming Chris Young into giving up his balls, too, but I will forego that topic for the greater good.

Just this much: should I ever get over to your island and to a Mets game, and caught a baseball, I'm keeping it. I'm not gonna hand my precious baseball up to a snotty-nosed half-pint.
