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Dallas Wins Again! That’s Gold, Jerry! Gold!
By Kenny Bania
Oh man, what a game! Game 2 of the Conference Semifinals — Dallas Stars vs. Vegas Golden Knights — and let me tell you, it had everything. Drama! Action! Bases-clearing doubles! That’s what I call content, baby!
So picture this: it’s Sunday night, people are still digesting their brisket, and George Costanza — yes, that George Costanza — steps up and delivers a whopper of a game! He goes 2-for-4, hits a double, drives in FOUR runs, scores one himself, and suddenly Dallas is up two games to none. That’s not just a win — that’s a solid opener for a motivational seminar!
Biggest moment? Bottom of the fifth. One out. Bases juiced like a protein shake. Costanza gets a slider — boom! Bases-clearing double! The place explodes! The guy’s knocking in runs like he’s ordering soup at Mendy’s! Four RBIs in one night? That’s what I call value!
And don’t even get me started on Vegas. They jumped out to a 2-0 lead, sure. Looked real slick. But then? Poof! Gone. Like my chances with that dental hygienist from Hoboken. I mean, come on, you can’t give up six runs in two innings and expect to win! That’s rookie stuff. Amateur hour!
Ricardo Ramos — tough break, buddy. But you serve up a hanging slider to Costanza? You pay the price. That pitch was so flat I could’ve used it as a dinner plate!
After the game, Costanza told the Dallas Herald, “It feels good to win.” You know what else feels good, George? Killing it in front of a national audience. That’s what feels good! You’re not just a shortstop — you’re a closer! That’s gold, George! Gold!
Next up? Game 3 at T-Mobile Arena in Vegas. Tuesday night. And let me tell you — if Dallas wins again? This series is gonna be tighter than a pair of Kramer’s jeans after laundry day!
I’m Kenny Bania. I cover hockey and I eat veal.
See you Tuesday — and bring your best material!
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