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Jay: Snootchie-bootchies, man! Yo Silent Bob, the freakin’ Padres are like, UNSTOPPABLE, dude! Six and oh in the playoffs, baby! Six and oh! They go into freakin’ Cincinnati, Great American Ball Park, Reds fans all screamin’ “OHHHHHH!” and Padres are like, “shut yer pieholes!” Boom, seven to six, San Diego, what the F— word!
Enrique freakin’ Moreno, three hits, three freakin’ RBIs, like he’s Babe Ruth mixed with a sexy churro, man. And Gargallo, my dude, rips that big ol’ two-run double, like “HEY REDS, SUCK IT!” Padres just slappin’ Cincy around like Randall does Dante when he forgets the keys, bro.
And yo, the Reds tried to come back, right? Eighth inning, little home run, couple doubles, makin’ it all sweaty for a sec, but Padres bullpen’s like, “nah nah nah nah, Reds, game over, thanks for playin’.”
Six and oh, man! The freakin’ Friars are rollin’ like they got the goddamn Infinity Gauntlet, Silent Bob. Snoogans!
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