Richard Hildago:
Massively-muscled Venezuelan OF for the Astros. Hit 44 homers one year. Hit the first HR ever in their many-named (currently Japanese Air-Conditioner) park.
Played CF for a while…which filled the Houstons with a desire to see how well Craig Biggio could play CF.
Started 2004 by winning Player of the Month in April. Slumped in May and was benched by Jimy "Which of You ****ers Stole My Other M?" Williams for not hustling. Traded to the Mets in June and went on an immediate hot streak…
…and then faded afterwards (final stats: .239, 25 HR) as the Mets made an impressive 27-50 stretch drive to reach 71-91, at the mere cost of Scott Kazmir and Ty Wigginton.
Walked in Free Agency, after Houston went to the WS and Jim Duquette said, "Oh, so
Beltran was the Houston CF we were looking for! My bad" to his replacement, Omar Minaya.
Was a Long Island Duck a few years later. Now you know.