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Ohhhhhh, LEMME TELL YA! Lemme tell ya what happened at Wrigley, DA BEARS FANS! The Chicago CUBS, yeah, they’re the Cubs, took the Pittsburgh Pirates to school, 9-4, and now we’re talkin’ about a ONE-GAME PLAYOFF, capisce? One game, all it takes, like a da Bears game in December, you feel me?!
DA FIRST THING YA GOTTA KNOW… Israel Fernandez, that third baseman, BOOM, 2-for-4, homers, scores two, drives in two—he’s doing it ALL! I tell ya, he’s like a da Bears linebacker back there, hitting everything in his path. You can’t stop him, nobody!
And the Cubs? They just kept hammering. Woodfin, Padillo, Quiroz, J. Rivera—these guys aren’t messin’ around. Base hits, doubles, stolen bases! I mean, J. Rivera swiping SIX—SIX! He’s faster than da Bears running back on a Thursday night primetime!
Pirates, meanwhile, ohhhh, the Pirates, they tried… they really did. Ramirez gave up eight runs in less than five innings! I mean, it was like they were playing da Bears defense in ’85 against Marino or somethin’, c’mon! They got a little rally late with two in the 7th and one in the 9th, but it’s too little, too late.
AND LISTEN… D. Cranmer comes in and just shuts ’em down after that—8 innings, 4 earned, keeps it together like a Bears offensive line on a cold windy night at Soldier Field. Perfect.
Now it’s all tied, one game to decide who moves on. Wrigley was packed—39,693 folks! The weather? Clear, 54 degrees, wind in from left. Perfect baseball day. Perfect!
DA BOTTOM LINE… Cubs are alive! Pirates better watch out! It’s one game, da Bears style, and you KNOW the Cubs are gonna bring the heat. It’s like the Super Bowl but with baseball bats instead of footballs!
WHO’S GONNA WIN? We’ll see Friday at PNC Park, baby. ONE GAME, BIG TIME. LET’S GO CUBS!
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