Portland Raccoons (ABL)

[Westheim]

The good news? We can’t possibly lose more than four games this week!

All Star Game

The Continental League beats the Federal League in the All Star Game, 8-2. MVP honors go to Boston’s Willie Vega, who hits a 3-run homer in the third inning to open the scoring in the contest. VAN Dan Schneller also drives in two runs on two hits.

Ryan Bedrosian and Chuck Jones each pitch an inning. Bedrosian gives up a run, Jones does not.

Raccoons (43-47) @ Loggers (43-46) – July 12-15, 2040

After last week’s split the season series was still even, now with four wins for each side. Sixth in runs scored, eighth in runs allowed, the Loggers had a -1 run differential (Coons: -18).

Projected matchups:
Nelson Moreno (1-4, 4.42 ERA) vs. Sal Chavez (6-9, 4.58 ERA)
Raffaello Sabre (6-6, 3.41 ERA) vs. Alfredo Vargas (8-8, 3.08 ERA)
Ryan Bedrosian (5-0, 2.06 ERA) vs. Joe Feltman (9-5, 3.85 ERA)
Angelo Montano (2-4, 6.27 ERA) vs. Sergio Piedra (2-8, 5.14 ERA)

There were only righty pitchers to find here.

The Critters now had Jesus Maldonado back, which was probably a good thing.

Game 1
POR: CF Maldonado – 2B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Greenway – SS Hunter – 3B Ramos – 1B Anderson – P Moreno
MIL: 2B Lira – CF Cannizzard – SS Del Vecchio – 3B Paul – C F. Gomez – RF Valenzuela – 1B Torri – LF J. Nelson – P S. Chavez

Cosmo hit a triple in his first attempt after the All Star Game and was singled in by Manny Fernandez for a quick 1-0 lead, but Moreno squandered it right away, conceding a single to Tony Lira and a hissing double to Jared Paul with two outs to get the game back tied. Nels instead singled in Berto with two outs in the second inning. Berto also had tripled, following up a Tony Hunter single … but Hunter had been caught stealing already before Berto hit the three-sacker, so the Raccoons got only a run out of the inning. Berto also hit a double to right in the fourth inning, which led absolutely nowhere, and with every other player you’d think about a cycle now, but Berto had last hit a home run during the President Eisenhower administration, so that was that. Instead, Jared Paul got the game tied, drawing a leadoff walk in a full count in the bottom 4th, stealing second, reached third base on Morales’ bad throw, and then scored on Dan Torri’s 2-out hit.

Bad weather arrived by the fifth and ended Moreno’s day after five innings of 3-hit, but unrewarding 2-run ball. When the game continued after about an hour of dreary interruption, Berto singled (and was stranded) and sat a home run shy of the cycle. The Raccoons were also out-hitting the Loggers 11-3 and had nothing to show for it. David Lindstrom pitched two innings for Portland to keep the game tied, allowed three runners, but also got two 6-4-3 double plays turned, so that helped in not soaking an L. That would be reserved for Brent Clark, who walked Lira to begin the bottom 8th, with PH Travis Zitzner – (snort!) that guy! – grounding out and moving the runner over. Ted Del Vecchio then immediately hit an RBI single when Jermaine Campbell, that bum, got involved. Gualter Cymbron was in for the ninth inning, which an unretired, homer-seeeking Berto was leading off. He drew a walk, and once again was left on base when Anderson, Hooge, and Maldonado made outs in quick succession. 3-2 Loggers. Fernandez 2-3, BB, RBI; Morales 2-4; Ramos 3-3, BB, 3B, 2B; Lindstrom 2.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 0 K;

Game 2
POR: 1B Maldonado – 2B Trevino – CF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Greenway – SS Hunter – 3B Ramos – LF Daiker – P Sabre
MIL: 2B Lira – CF Cannizzard – SS Del Vecchio – 3B Paul – C F. Gomez – 1B Zitzner – RF Prestwood – LF Torri – P A. Vargas

Four batters in, the bases were loaded and Greenway hit a ball at Jared Paul that was turned into a force on Maldonado at home plate. At least Tony Hunter could come through, hitting a 2-out, 2-run double to right. Berto walked, Daiker grounded out, stranding three. A Lira single, Del Vecchio walking, and a successfully executed double steal allowed the Loggers to get back a run on a grounder right away. A Tyler Prestwood homer tied the game then in the second… Sabre nicked Prestwood his next time up, then with Felipe Gomez already on third base after a leadoff double and a groundout by Zitzner. Dan Torri hit an RBI single to left, 3-2, and Sabre looked like not much of anything again in this game.

He *did* draw a walk to lead off the fifth, though, with Trevino and Fernandez hitting singles to fill the bases, and Morales sticking his fat bum out to take a pitch to it, forcing Sabre in with the tying run. Greenway then hit a go-ahead sac fly, which was more than one dared to ask for, and Hunter’s fly to right was caught by Prestwood. The bags were full again in the sixth, then with Berto (single), Maldo, and Cosmo (2-out walks). Manny Fernandez hit a deep fly to right, but not deep enough; Prestwood caught that one on the warning track. For ***** and giggles, the seventh (Berto) and eighth (Manny) also ended with F9’s, with one and two runners aboard, respectively. The knockout blow was consistently denied in this game, but at least Garavito and Ramirez followed on Sabre in a way that didn’t blow the tender 4-3 lead, and the reward for sitting with clenched butt cheeks for hours on end was a 2-out RBI single Berto slapped off Cesar Perez and by Tony Lira in the ninth, bringing home Morales with an insurance run after all. Berto dashed for third base on a Ledford single, pulled up lame, and limped off the field. There was no joy in baseball, only more and more anguish and agony… Kilgallen replaced him as pinch-runner, then eventually at first base with Maldo moving to third. At least Rico Sanchez put the Loggers away… 5-3 Coons. Trevino 1-2, 3 BB; Morales 2-4, RBI; Ramos 2-4, BB, RBI; Ledford (PH) 2-2;

Saturday arrived and Bedrosian was a scratch. Surely nothing going on with that …

Game 3
POR: 1B Maldonado – 2B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – CF Hooge – SS Hunter – RF Greenway – 3B Nickas – P Montano
MIL: 2B Lira – RF Cannizzard – 3B Paul – SS Del Vecchio – C F. Gomez – 1B Duncan – LF Prestwood – CF Torri – P Feltman

Felipe Gomez and Nick Duncan ripped hits to go to the corners in the second inning with nobody out. Prestwood’s sac fly gave Milwaukee the lead, and Angelo Montano kept being smacked around. Dan Torri hit a single that sent Duncan to third base, and when Feltman hit a grounder at Steve Nickas, the useless bum fudged that for an error. Tony Lira, with the Loggers up 2-0, hit the most vicious ball yet, a loud spanker … right at Tony Hunter, 6-4-3, spook dispelled. Well, except for another seven innings and 69 games of horrible baseball.

Montano fooled no one just like the offense scared nobody. Feltman comfortably pitched a 3-hitter through five, while the Raccoons saw Montano dismembered in a 3-run bottom 5th in which the Loggers just kept ripping, including a 2-run homer by Tim Cannizzard to right. When the Raccoons suddenly loaded the bases in the sixth inning, they did so on a Fernandez single, catcher’s interference being called with Ed Hooge poking, and a 4-pitch walk to Hunter. Greenway batted with one out, and spanked a grounder into a double play. Montano, down 5-0 with four earned, was back in the bottom 6th for some raised eyebrows, but the Raccoons were bracing for a bullpen game around a Brent Clark spot start on Sunday and had to ration their pen. Somehow Montano made it through the sixth despite another hit (10 total) and a sharp liner that Manny Fernandez caught.

Then came the seventh, Oliver Anderson singled in Montano’s spot, and that was the first of four straight singles to suddenly chew up Feltman. Two runs scored, but ultimately the inning ended with the bases loaded and Hunter striking out in a 5-2 game. The next spectacle came in the bottom 8th, in which Jermaine Campbell, a.k.a. the leftovers from the previous inning, got an out from Dan Torri before Chuck Jones got the ball. He would throw 25 pitches to get two outs and allowed seven runs along the way, all earned. Hector Alvarez doubled, Tony Lira homered, 7-2. Cannizzard popped out, after which Jared Paul singled, Del Vecchio walked, and Gomez singled, loading them up. Danny Valenzuela hit a 2-run single, 9-2, and Prestwood hit an RBI single, 10-2. Torri singled, 12-2. Alvarez then grounded out. The Coons would score two off Rob Clack in the ninth, which nobody cared about, and I wasn’t really paying attention, instead checking for the highest skyscrapers in Milwaukee. 12-4 Loggers. Maldonado 2-4; Fernandez 2-5, RBI; Hooge 3-3; Ledford (PH) 1-1, RBI; Anderson (PH) 1-2;

Sometimes you just want to massacre them all.

Speaking of which…

Interlude: Trade

The Raccoons began the deconstruction process on Sunday in a trade with the Knights. Atlanta received SP Ryan Bedrosian (5-0, 2.06 ERA), the unlucky bastard with his 14 no-decisions, CL Rico Sanchez (1-5, 4.62 ERA, 19 SV), LF/RF Brad Ledford (.271, 0 HR, 2 RBI), and AA right-hander Willie Morales.

The Raccoons took in two 19-year-olds in SS/3B Matt Waters and SP Jason Wheatley. They were, respectively, a #9 pick (2039) and #31 pick (2038), as well as the #13 and #38 prospects in the game at this point. Wheatley had five pitches and excelled in stuff and movement especially, while Waters was a power potential bat with good (but not great) defense up the middle.

In accompanying roster moves, the Raccoons flew in Cory Lambert (0-0, 11.25 ERA) to make a spot start on regular rest, plus Ryan van Campenhout (0-0, 3.00 ERA) and Francisco Pena (3-1, 3.98 ERA) – we had been on 11 pitches before the deal.

Raccoons (43-47) @ Loggers (43-46) – July 12-15, 2040

Game 4
POR: 3B Maldonado – 2B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – CF Hooge – SS Hunter – RF Greenway – 1B Anderson – P Lambert
MIL: 2B Lira – 1B Zitzner – SS Del Vecchio – 3B Paul – RF Duncan – C F. Gomez – CF Prestwood – LF J. Nelson – P Piedra

Lambert was torn in half as soon as he set paw on the mound, with the first four Loggers to face him all raking sharp base hits, and three of them ended up scoring. Another 3-spot occurred in the third inning; while Lambert managed to load the bases all by himself, it was the 1-out, bags-full grounder that Tony Hunter threw past Trevino that really broke the game wide open. Also, you know you’re bad when TRAVIS ******* ZITZNER hits a homer off you; that happened in the fourth inning, and it made it a 7-0 game, five runs being earned, and all seven being deserved.

Zitzner then hit a 2-run double off Pena in the next 3-spot, which occurred as early as the fifth inning. Like Lambert, Pena retired basically nobody and relied on defenders making catches on balls hit hard enough to break a passing freight train in half. Top 6th, for some comedy intermission, the Raccoons put Kilmer, Hooge, and Hunter on base with one out, then had Greenway shank another chance with a double play grounder, 4-6-3. Bottom 6th, Pena gave up a Duncan single, then doubles to Gomez and Prestwood, 12-0. Victor Acosta’s pinch-hit single made it 13-0 and brought in van Campenhout in a double switch that also replaced another eyesore (Greenway) with yet another eyesore (Daiker). Lira walked. Zitzner hit an RBI single. Del Vecchio walked. Jared Paul singled home a run. Nick Duncan singled home two. Felipe Gomez doubled in another pair. Out with van Campenhout, who faced six and retired nobody, in with Garavito. Torri singled before Justin Nelson hit into a double play, stopping the genocide on the Procyonidae at nine for the inning and NINETEEN in total.

The count reached 20 in the seventh, with Lira reaching against Garavito, although the inning should have ended with him stranded on third base. But Del Vecchio’s grounder to first was then thrown away by Anderson for a run-scoring error. Garavito then gave up another run on another two hits… 21-0 Loggers. Trevino 2-4;

In other news

July 11 – Salem CF/RF Armando Herrera (.296, 1 HR, 29 RBI) is going to miss a month with a broken rib.
July 13 – SAL 1B/LF/RF Jose Rivera (.317, 17 HR, 76 RBI) has four hits and drives in seven runs in a 16-6 bashing of the Warriors.
July 13 – Tijuana RF/1B/LF Willie Ojeda (.319, 4 HR, 31 RBI) has a 20-game hitting streak after landing two knocks in a 6-0 loss to the Thunder.
July 14 – The Condors’ Bill Quintero (4-7, 3.91 ERA) throws a 1-hitter against the Thunder for a 2-0 shutout win. The only Thunder hit is a single by #8 hitter SS Josh Kalinowski (.282, 0 HR, 15 RBI).
July 14 – The Pacifics get OF Juan Benavides (.314, 8 HR, 26 RBI) from the Gold Sox for CF/RF Pat Pohl (.216, 2 HR, 17 RBI) and a weird catching prospect.

FL Player of the Week: SAL INF Alex Castillo (.296, 4 HR, 27 RBI), hitting .600 (9-15) with 2 HR, 6 RBI
CL Player of the Week: LVA OF Steve Jorgensen (.290, 12 HR, 49 RBI), batting .588 (10-17) with 2 HR, 5 RBI

Complaints and stuff

If I said something now, would it actually matter?

I just want to … I just want to sleep through the next 68 games.

Fun Fact: Ryan Bedrosian had an .800 winning percentage (20-5) as a Raccoon.

Yeah well, it wasn’t his ******* fault.

Maud, send some flowers along. – No, I’m not gonna pick them, I feel mellow.

[Westheim]

Trade

Monday was an off day for Portland, except for trading RF Troy Greenway (.200, 8 HR, 28 RBI) to the Wolves, who were convinced they could get something out of him for the 11-something million bucks left on his contract.

The Raccoons received the #14 prospect, 23-year-old LF Sandy Casaus, a right-handed Dominican batter with a short fuse in the box, but good power potential and a knack for base stealing despite average speed. He was also not a future Gold Glover and lacked arm strength.

The Raccoons called up 2034 second-rounder and long-time St. Pete dweller and left-handed batter Bill Balaski, who played corner outfield with meager success. He was hitting .303 with 8 homers in AAA, by far the best he had done down there so far in the many, many seasons he had spent there. He was already 25, so there was nothing to write home about here.

The Coons also put Alberto Ramos on the DL with knee inflammation, rendering him out until early August. He was replaced by 2B Jose Brito, 26 by now, and never hitting anything in various callups. Cosmo would play third base for the next few weeks.

Somewhere in these couple of days, fan interest went down to zero, and Maud called me in New York that Nick Valdes had called in and asked for me 25 times already. I told her that if that ****** didn’t know the team played in New York right now and thus kept calling Portland, it was his ******* problem.

Raccoons (44-50) @ Crusaders (41-50) – July 17-19, 2040

The horror continued in New York, where the Crusaders were already up 6-3 on the Coons, and couldn’t wait to let their second-worst offense getting boosted by the Raccoons’ utter lack of pitching of any kind. New York was fifth from the bottom in runs allowed, like that meant anything with Portland in play.

Projected matchups:
Nelson Moreno (1-4, 4.10 ERA) vs. Gabriel Lara (0-4, 7.38 ERA)
Raffaello Sabre (7-6, 3.47 ERA) vs. Julian Ponce (9-8, 3.30 ERA)
Angelo Montano (2-5, 6.23 ERA) vs. Josh Brown (10-5, 3.41 ERA)

Right, left, left.

Game 1
POR: 1B Maldonado – 3B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Morales – CF Hooge – SS Hunter – RF Balaski – 2B Brito – P Moreno
NYC: RF Salek – 3B Sifuentes – C J. Herrera – CF Besaw – LF C. Russell – 2B Duenez – 1B Rudd – SS J. Adams – P G. Lara

I also almost strangled our #8 prospect when he remarked before the game that now so many of his friends from St. Pete were here to have a jolly good time.

Cosmo scored his first two times up, hitting a single ahead of Fernandez’ own single and scoring on Morales’ groundout in the first inning, and being doubled in by Ed Hooge in the third inning for a 2-0 lead behind Moreno, who was already the #2 starter on this team and thus not smart to strangle. He pitched a few decent early innings, then bunted Balaski (walk) and Brito (single) into scoring position, giving himself up for the first out in the fourth. Maldo hit an RBI single, 3-0, and Cosmo smacked a 2-run double past Rich Salek, then scored on a Fernandez single, 6-0. The inning fizzled out after that, but the bold half of me hoped that this would put the game more or less away. Only Mario Duenez had a base hit off Moreno through five, and there was a deep fly by Tom Rudd that Balaski caught at the fence in his debut. And while the contact got a little louder in the later innings, he didn’t give up anything that would overpower the defense or the confines of the ballpark, and no Crusader reached base. The Raccoons also went asleep for a while, but returned in the ninth inning to exploit an error by reliever Luis Villagomez that put Fernandez on base, after which Morales and Hoogey ripped back-to-back doubles. Brito would drive in a run with two outs, everything looked like Moreno would breeze towards a 9-0 shutout and then – thunder, lightning, and the game went into a rain delay of over an hour that was bureaucratically correctly waited out even though the Crusaders were out-hit 14-1 and there was no way they would come back, not even against the hold-my-fudge-bar Raccoons pen… Ryan van Campenhout put two on base, but the Crusaders wouldn’t score. 9-0 Critters. Trevino 3-5, 2B, 2 RBI; Fernandez 2-5, 2B, RBI; Hooge 2-5, 2B, 3 RBI; Brito 4-5, 2B, RBI; Moreno 8.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 4 K, W (2-4);

(barks skywards) I can’t have anything, can I??

Game 2
POR: 1B Maldonado – 3B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – SS Hunter – 2B Brito – CF Kilgallen – RF Daiker – P Sabre
NYC: RF Salek – 3B Sifuentes – C J. Herrera – CF Besaw – 2B Duenez – LF Platero – 1B Stedham – SS J. Adams – P Ponce

Both sides had two hits in the first three innings, with Daiker and Cosmo reaching the corners in the top 3rd but being stranded when Manny Fernandez grounded out. Another scoreless inning followed, with Sabre good, but he had the vibe of impending explosion about him, too. It took a leadoff triple to get something going in the game; Kilgallen hit it in the fifth, and while Daiker popped out (…), Sabre slapped an RBI single to center. The bags then filled up with Maldonado and Trevino, allowing Manny to slap a ball at Duenez for maybe two – except that Cosmo broke Jim Adams in half to break up the double play, too. One run scored, and Chris Russell had to replace Adams, who had landed hard on his shoulder and would be diagnosed with a subluxation after the game. Kilmer then struck out, stranding them on the corners.

Juan Herrera and Joe Besaw hit back-to-back singles in the sixth, but the Crusaders continued to not put it all together. The Critters countered with a string of 2-out singles in the seventh, starting with Sabre (…!) and continuing all the way through Kilmer, who drove in a pair, before Hunter lined out to Salek. Both teams hit two singles in the eighth without scoring, and Sabre squeezed his bum into the ninth inning on an 8-hitter and 92 pitches. With a 4-0 lead, an assortment of relievers was warming up. Duenez grounded out to second. Jose Platero grounded out to third. Jesse Stedham, as ex-Coon obviously, singled. Russell struck out, though, ending the game. 4-0 Furballs. Trevino 4-5; Kilmer 2-5, 2 RBI; Kilgallen 2-4, 3B; Sabre 9.0 IP, 9 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 4 K, W (8-6) and 2-4, RBI;

Sixth career shutout for Sabre, and the first since that Closing day spectacle in ’36.

Game 3
POR: 1B Maldonado – 3B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – CF Kilgallen – 2B Brito – RF Balaski – SS Nickas – P Montano
NYC: 3B Sifuentes – LF C. Russell – SS Salek – CF Besaw – RF Platero – C J. Herrera – 1B Rudd – 2B Duenez – P J. Brown

Montano outlasted Josh Brown – narrowly. The Crusaders’ starter left in the second inning with back problems, while Montano had a scoreless first, then was ravaged for five runs in the bottom 2nd. A Platero single and a Herrera homer was the start, and then they just kept whacking away line drives for the other three runs. Duenez’ double play roller with three on and nobody out in the bottom 3rd got another run home, while the Raccoons stood and marveled. Montano pitched another inning, badly but scorelessly, then was hit for in the fifth after another shambles outing.

The Coons had only three hits against an assortment of pitchers through five innings, then got Maldonado and Trevino on base to begin the sixth against Casey McQueen, but the only countable result was a sac fly by Jeff Kilmer. Ed Hooge plated Brito with a pinch-hit single in the seventh… with two outs and *after* Steve Nickas had smacked a ball into a double play with Brito and Balaski both aboard. And for what? For Joe Besaw to homer off Garavito in the bottom of the inning, keeping the gap at five runs. He also allowed a leadoff single to Mario Duenez in the eighth, and when Campbell replaced him he gave up a double to Ramon Sifuentes right away so Garavito’s run absolutely did score. 8-2 Crusaders. Trevino 2-4; Brito 2-4; Hooge (PH) 1-2, RBI; Pena 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 4 K;

Raccoons (46-51) @ Aces (50-46) – July 20-22, 2040

Next up for the team with a pitching staff in complete disarray were the Aces, who sat fourth in the CL South but only six games out rather than 18 1/2 like some other fourth-place team that should remain unnamed. The Aces were in the bottom three in runs scored, fourth in runs allowed, and actually had a -19 run differential (Coons: -39 and growing with every 21-run whacking). Vegas led the season series, 2-1, and only had one significant injury in infielder Jason Bensinger.

Projected matchups:
Cory Lambert (0-1, 11.25 ERA) vs. Willie Gallardo (7-8, 4.70 ERA)
Sal Lozano (0-1, 3.75 ERA) vs. Israel Mendoza (7-8, 4.35 ERA)
Nelson Moreno (2-4, 3.44 ERA) vs. Oscar Valdes (10-5, 2.36 ERA)

Only right-handers up here; the Aces’ only lefty, Jesus Rodarte (7-8, 3.38 ERA), went on Thursday. The Raccoons dumped Francisco Pena (6.08 ERA) for the Xth time and brought up Sal Lozano for the spot start on Saturday, thus lining up three pitchers that prior to May 26 of this year had represented a grand total of zero major league appearances.

Well you can’t say the numbers are deceiving, at least.

Game 1
POR: 1B Maldonado – 3B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – CF Hooge – SS Hunter – RF Balaski – 2B Brito – P Lambert
LVA: CF Beaudoin – RF Jorgensen – SS O’Keefe – 3B Rossi – LF O. Burgos – 1B J. Byrd – C D. Gomez – 2B D. Richardson – P W. Gallardo

Maldonado opened the series with a jack to right, and the Coons tacked on a run right away with a Kilmer double and Hoogey’s RBI single in the same inning. Ozzie Burgos’ double and Danny Gomez’ single gave the Aces a run off Lambert in the bottom 2nd, but hey, who would have thought a 2-0 lead would last even THAT long? That was about as good as it got with Lambert, though. Chris O’Keefe hit a 2-out double in the bottom 3rd, Nate Rossi came up with a screaming RBI triple, and then Burgos popped out to show mercy unto the Raccoons’ completely inept Plan F pitcher.

For giggles, Lambert then gave himself a new lead in the fourth, when the Raccoons caused their own 2-out stir. Bill Balaski had started his career 0-for-8, but whacked a ball over Justin Beaudoin for a double. Brito got on, and then Lambert zinged a grounder through the left side for an RBI single, 3-2 Critters. Maldonado hit another deep fly to left, but couldn’t beat any between Burgos and the fence, ending the inning. Lambert survived a leadoff walk in the fourth, got another run of support when Hoogey drove in Cosmo in the top 5th, then tacked on a scoreless fifth with some major help from Maldonado, who swiped a dastardly spanked ball by Burgos to starve a runner on second base in the bottom of that inning. Six innings of 2-run ball were all the Raccoons dared ask for, and when Lambert’s spot came up in the seventh with Balaski and Brito aboard and two outs, Oliver Anderson hit for him. Anderson walked, but Maldonado stranded three with a soft fly to right against right-hander Marty Madera, who then went on to get singled to death by the 2-3-4-5 hitter in the eighth. Kilmer and Hooge both drove in a run, 6-2, but left-hander Tony Chavez, who replaced him, was not the solution either. He threw a wild pitch, allowed a sac fly to Hunter, a pinch-hit RBI single with two gone to Kilgallen, and then Maldonado was only retired on his grounder on a fine play by Doug Richardson.

But these wouldn’t be the Coons if they wouldn’t spin a save opportunity from a 6-run lead. Lindstrom and Garavito held up fine enough in relief of Lambert, but van Campenhout, the dismal sucker, did not. He retired one batter out of five he faced in the bottom 9th and was yanked with O’Keefe and Rossi on the bases, two runs already in, and one out in the inning. Brent Clark saved the game by getting pops from Ozzie Burgos and John Byrd. 8-4 Raccoons. Maldonado 2-6, HR, RBI; Trevino 2-4, 2 BB, 2B; Kilmer 2-6, 2B, RBI; Hooge 3-6, 3 RBI; Balaski 2-4, BB, 2B; Brito 2-3, BB, RBI; Kilgallen (PH) 1-1;

Cory Lambert is now a winner in the major leagues.

Baseball will never be the same again.

Game 2
POR: 1B Maldonado – 3B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – 2B Kilgallen – SS Hunter – RF Balaski – CF Daiker – P Lozano
LVA: CF Beaudoin – SS O’Keefe – 1B Levis – C Wiersma – RF Jorgensen – 3B Rossi – LF J. Byrd – 2B D. Richardson – P I. Mendoza

By contrast, Lozano was ravaged for three runs in the first inning on Saturday, allowing two walks, two screaming extra-base hits, and also a balk for good measure as the Aces were picking all the limbs from his body. Lozano then angrily struck out the side in the second before things got a bit more normal going forward, also in the sense that the Raccoons weren’t particularly doing anything for four innings until out of the blue the top of the fifth began with a singles onslaught by the bottom of the order, starting with Balaski. Lozano hit an RBI single to get Portland on the board, 3-1 with the tying runs on the corner. Nate Rossi then mishandled a Maldonado roller for a run-scoring error, and Cosmo shyly singled to load the bases … with nobody out, so the handbrake was applied immediately, with Fernandez flying out to Steve Jorgensen, who threw out Lozano being sent as the tying run, and Kilmer went down on strikes. Monsieurs and Gentlewomen – the Coons.

Portland tied the game in the seventh in unearned fashion, Daiker reaching base on another bad play by Rossi for a second error. This gave the Aces – since Lozano had not allowed a hit after the first inning – as many errors as base hits in the game. Cosmo singled home Daiker with two outs, tying the game at three, but Manny Fernandez grounded out and nothing else happened. So of course when Lozano returned for the bottom 7th the Aces suddenly remembered how to hit; Rossi ripped a double, having to make good. Richardson’s single gave them a 4-3 lead, and the pinch-hit home run to left by Ricardo Zarazua anded Lozano’s day. Portland reacted with their most formidable force – BILL BALASKI. With Kilgallen on base, Balaski crushed a 2-out, 2-run homer off Tony Chavez to cut the gap down to one run! Top 9th, Damon DeOrio retired Hooge in the #9 hole to get going, but then blew the lead with gap doubles to both Maldo and Manny, getting everybody even at six. Kilmer, however, grounded out to leave Fernandez on base, and Chuck Jones got picked apart by John Velazquez, Beaudoin, and Doug Levis for a walkoff loss. 7-6 Aces. Trevino 2-4, RBI; Balaski 3-4, HR, 2 RBI; #

There are two sides to this story. Well, yes, Chuck Jones took the loss and dropped to 5-2 for the year. Calamity. But Doug Levis also strained or pulled or tore or broke something running down to first base, which he reached on all four and screaming, so there were degrees to the misery here.

Game 3
POR: SS Hunter – 3B Trevino – CF Maldonado – C Morales – LF Hooge – 2B Brito – RF Balaski – 1B Anderson – P Moreno
LVA: CF Beaudoin – RF Jorgensen – SS O’Keefe – 3B Rossi – LF O. Burgos – 1B J. Byrd – C D. Gomez – 2B van Brunt – P O. Valdes

Five days after a spiffy fine start in New York, Nelson Moreno had his head caved in early on Sunday, with Beaudoin opening with a jack to left, followed by a Jorgensen triple off the fence in right. That run, too, scored, and the Aces were up 2-0 rather quickly. Balaski then hit a solo shot in the second inning, raising some eyebrows about who that kid actually was. The following frame Cosmo, Maldo, and Hooge loaded the bases against Oscar Valdes, but while Morales had already struck out, both Brito and Balaski popped out over the infield for no great effect. Beaudoin and Jorgensen both reached base again facing Moreno in the bottom 3rd, with the former scoring on a sac fly to extend their lead to 3-1, and in the fourth they found another run between two singles and a throwing error by Tony Morales before Beaudoin flew out to Maldonado in shallow center and Jorgensen popped out over the infield.

Nels lasted six innings, then was hit for when his spot led off the seventh, still down 4-1. Kilgallen struck out in his spot, but Hunter walked, Maldo reached on an error by O’Keefe, and then with two outs against Jerry Hodges, Tony Morales zipped an RBI single past Jeff van Brunt. Hooge grounded out, leaving Moreno on the hook. His loss was then cemented in the eighth inning, in which the Raccoons cycled through Lindstrom, Jones, and the dismal disaster that was van Campenhout, hoping for somebody, anybody, to get an out, somehow – that Anderson made an error on a simple grounder didn’t help either. The Aces strafed the three relievers for four runs (three earned) to put the game away. Kilgallen hit a double and scored on a Trevino grounder in the ninth, which was, fun fact, not enough to make up six runs. 8-3 Aces.

In other news

July 16 – In a stunning development, the Titans plainly give up and trade SP Leonhart Becker (7-4, 3.37 ERA) to the Gold Sox for two prospects, neither of them ranked.
July 16 – WAS C Nate Evans (.313, 8 HR, 59 RBI) will be out until early September with a strained hammy.
July 17 – The hitting streak of Tijuana’s Willie Ojeda (.322, 4 HR, 31 RBI) ends at 23 games with a freezeout, 0-for-4, against the Bayhawks.
July 18 – Salem INF/RF Jose Castro (.235, 6 HR, 47 RBI) is out six weeks with a quad tear.
July 18 – SAC LF/RF Joreao Porfirio (.293, 8 HR, 31 RBI) will be shut down until September due to elbow tendinitis.
July 19 – The Stars pick up 2B/SS Oscar Aguirre (.216, 6 HR, 22 RBI) from the Falcons for 1B/3B Ryan Lorensen (.257, 3 HR, 17 RBI) and #41 prospect SP Eric Jacobson.
July 19 – The Bayhawks acquire C Rey Cedillo (.297, 3 HR, 38 RBI) from the Cyclones, parting with a prospect in the deal.
July 20 – The Indians’ Keith Damron (.262, 2 HR, 3 RBI) clips a pinch-hit single with two outs in the ninth inning, taking a no-hitter away from OCT SP Casey Pinter (8-8, 4.23 ERA), who has to settle for a 1-hit shutout in a 4-0 Thunder win.
July 20 – PIT OF/1B Ivan Cantu (.417, 0 HR, 1 RBI) has his first five hits of the season all in the same game, the 16th major league game of his career, helping to down the Scorpions 16-3 with five singles and one RBI.
July 22 – BOS CF Mark Vermillion (.311, 6 HR; 48 RBI) goes 5-for-5 with 2 RBI in a 13-3 rush of the Condors. The Titans score ten runs in the fifth inning alone.
July 22 – The Knights send SP Danny Orozco (8-9, 5.29 ERA) to the Scorpions for INF/RF Joe Crim (.279, 1 HR, 5 RBI) a prospect.

FL Player of the Week: NAS 3B/2B Jim “Mastodon” Allen (.371, 4 HR, 34 RBI), hitting .500 (11-22) with 11 RBI
CL Player of the Week: POR 2B/3B Enrique Trevino (.285, 0 HR, 28 RBI), batting .519 (14-27) with 4 RBI

Complaints and stuff

No more Sauerkraut no more!? What am I supposed to get riled up about then??

Oh right, we have no pitching, and will never have pitching again. I almost forgot.

Cosmo’s Player of the Week nod was the most subdued, stealthy approach to the title by a Raccoon that I have ever seen. Nobody quite noticed his many singles (only two of his 14 hits went for doubles). Maybe it’s being persistently distracted by a pitching staff being ablaze and dousing themselves with gasoline. Cosmo also has a 14-game hitting streak at the moment, dating back to before the All Star Game. It would be 21 games if not for a futile pinch-hitting assignment against the Loggers on the Fourth of July.

100 games are in the books for this year, which is weird because it feels like we lost 300 already. I will begrudgingly trust the standings posted by the league every day then…

Is Bill Balaski the player that will stop the bleeding and make the offense palatable again? His scouting report says no, but for the time being I’ll take his five-games-in OPS of 1.093 and go to bed with that.

Fun Fact: Nelson Moreno debuted 46 days ago and already has the second-most innings on the staff.

(opens mouth)

(whines)

(rolls into a furry ball)

[DD Martin]

So I assume Sabre is the next to be shipped out?

[Westheim]

Originally Posted by DD Martin

So I assume Sabre is the next to be shipped out?

I don't think we'll make it to the end of the season without him.

He is a free agent though, and if he gives at least a bag of baseballs for compensation, he'll be gone. The interesting question is what happens if he does *not* give compensation. I guess if he doesn't give compensation the Raccoons will make an offer to him in the fall. I mean *somebody* has to pitch even in dire times. And I can't stomach much more of Montano here...

Bernie Chavez will only return after the trade deadline. He has a team option for '41, which we will pick up.

I just wished we could get somebody from AAA to pitch to an ERA under seven.....

But generally the guys over 30 are readily available for all the prospects you can offer after the season. But Maldonado, Nettles, and one of the catchers look like people we want to keep as backbones going forward.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (47-53) vs. Condors (41-56) – July 24-26, 2040

Two hopeless teams in July. No, Maud, I don’t think we’ll need more than four, five hot dog vendors for this series.

Tijuana was in the bottom four in both runs scored and runs allowed with a -78 run differential (Critters: -41). We had also swept them in the first three-game set of the year, but the times where the Critters had a friendly sweep in them were long gone. On the other claw, the Condors were ravaged by injuries, with Zach Warner, Omar Uribe, Guillermo Obando, Roy Pincus, and a couple others all on the DL.

Projected matchups:
Raffaello Sabre (8-6, 3.23 ERA) vs. Edward Flinn (3-10, 5.04 ERA)
Angelo Montano (2-6, 6.85 ERA) vs. Gabe McGill (3-2, 1.04 ERA)
Cory Lambert (1-1, 7.71 ERA) vs. Brad Quintero (4-8, 4.01 ERA)

Those were all righties for the Condors, but we both had been off on Monday, so they could switch lefty Bryce Neal (7-10, 5.77 ERA) into the set, although looking at his stats it would really be best to leave the old man (age 41) alone…

Game 1
TIJ: CF J. Simmons – C Sawyer – RF Willie Ojeda – 3B Strohm – LF St. Pierre – 1B Vitalini – 2B Ragsdale – SS Riquenes – P Flinn
POR: CF Maldonado – 3B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – 2B Brito – SS Hunter – 1B Kilgallen – P Sabre

Sabre gave up a leadoff triple to Justin Simmons in the first, with Willie Ojeda plating the runner with a sac fly after Mike Sawyer struck out. The Condors tacked on two runs in the second, hitting three screamers off Sabre, including a leadoff double by Jon St. Pierre. The Raccoons however shanked Flinn even worse in the bottom 2nd. Hunter reached base with one out initially, stole second, and was singled home by Matt Kilgallen, who was forced out on a bad bunt afterwards. Then it went rather quickly: Maldonado hit a jack to right, Cosmo singled, and Manny hit another jack to right, turning a 3-1 deficit into a 5-3 lead. Bottom 3rd, Brito (infield single), Kilgallen (nailed), and Sabre (single) loaded the bases with one down, but Maldonado struck out and Cosmo grounded out to Dylan Ragsdale.

Sabre barely made it through five innings, allowing as many runs. Sergio Riquenes singled home Giacomino Vitalini in the fourth, and straight hits from the meat of the order with two outs in the inning produced another run in the fifth. Vitalini was then robbed by Manny in the gap, preserving a 6-5 lead, with the Critters’ sixth run having come on a second Fernandez homer in the bottom of the fourth. Campbell, the old fart, then effortlessly blew that lead in the sixth, putting Riquenes and Travis Sheaffer on base before giving up a 3-run homer to left to Mike Sawyer, putting the Condors up 8-6.

That wasn’t the end of it all, though. After some inefficient poking – the Condors doing theirs against van Campenhout – the Raccoons managed to tie the game in the eighth, getting even at eight when with Cosmo on base, Jeff Kilmer smashed a 2-out, 2-run homer off lefty Ryan McConnell. Tijuana answered fast, Alex Ramirez being shoved around for singles by Vinny Chavira and Vitalini as well as Ragsdale’s RBI double in the ninth inning, breaking that tie again. Bottom 9th, Steve Bailey for the Condors, Jose Brito ripped a double to left to begin the inning. Hunter struck out. Hooge hit for Kilgallen and grounded out, sending the runner to third base. Oliver Anderson had been batting in the #9 hole for a while, and only Nickas was left on the bench, so why pretend... Anderson grounded out, booking the Critters another loss. 9-8 Condors. Trevino 3-4, BB; Fernandez 4-5, 2 HR, 3 RBI; Kilmer 2-5, HR, 2 RBI; Brito 2-4, 2B;

Interlude: waiver claim

The Raccoons claimed 31-year-old right-hander Juan Zabala (0-0, 3.95 ERA) off waivers by the Scorpions on Wednesday. Zabala threw 93 with a curve and changeup and was borderline starter material – the problem was low stamina, and he had never made a start in the majors in eight years on the quad-A train for the Scorpions.

Well, that might change soon.

Ryan van Campenhout (10.80 ERA) was sent to St. Pete to make room.

Raccoons (47-53) vs. Condors (41-56) – July 24-26, 2040

Game 2
TIJ: CF J. Simmons – LF St. Pierre – RF Willie Ojeda – 3B Strohm – SS Ragsdale – C Sawyer – 2B B. Nelson – 1B Vitalini – P McGill
POR: CF Maldonado – 3B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – 2B Brito – SS Hunter – 1B Anderson – P Montano

Montano did not get disassembled into his constituent pieces in the first inning, but Cosmo did, hurting himself on a defensive play. He was replaced by Ed Hooge, playing center, while Maldonado moved to the hot corner. Bob Nelson followed soon on the stretcher express, suffering a gash on his wing when Bill Balaski collided with him, spikes first, at second base in the bottom 2nd. Balaski was out, but so was Nelson, replaced by James Arnett. The Raccoons retained runners on the corners with Morales and Brito and one out in a scoreless game, and while Tony Hunter popped out aimlessly, Oliver Anderson popped the power drought with a 2-out, 3-run jack to right, his first of the season in over 130 at-bats.

Montano took his sweet time to get rid of the lead, that was for sure. The Condors got nothing going in the early innings, and when they did load the bases in the fourth on two singles and a 2-out walk to Sawyer, it was Arnett to roll into a casual third out. But just when you thought it would all be well, Vitalini opened the fifth with a double, Justin Simmons walked, and St. Pierre hit a blast outta leftfield – tied ballgame, three runs each. Montano would pitch into the seventh before overcome by a leadoff walk to Simmons and Ojeda’s RBI double. He also walked Ragsdale with two outs, giving him six free passes on the day, which, fun fact, was too many. Lindstrom got a grounder to Maldonado from Ragsdale to end the inning in a 4-3 deficit. Montano would not suffer the loss, with McGill imploding in the same inning for back-to-back 2-out triples by Kilgallen (down left) and Maldonado (in the left-center gap), then fell behind when Hoogey slapped a ball through the left side for an RBI single, taking a 5-4 lead. Manny struck out to end the inning. New arrival Juan Zabala held it all together in the eighth, while Anderson added length with another 2-out extra-base knock in the bottom of the inning, scoring Balaski and Brito after Tony Hunter had hit into a 4-2-3 double play with three on and nobody down. Brent Clark then tried to blow it all to hell once more, allowing a leadoff single to St. Pierre in the ninth, then immediately an RBI double to Ojeda. Sawyer chipped in a blooper for an RBI single with two outs before Arnett was retired in deep left by Manny Fernandez… 7-6 Coons. Hooge 2-4, RBI; Balaski 1-2, 2 BB; Anderson 2-4, HR, 2B, 5 RBI; Kilgallen (PH) 1-1, 3B;

Game 3
TIJ: 3B Quintanilla – C Sawyer – RF Willie Ojeda – SS Strohm – 2B Ragsdale – LF St. Pierre – CF Riquenes – 1B Vitalini – P B. Quintero
POR: CF Maldonado – 2B Brito – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – 1B Anderson – SS Hunter – 3B Nickas – P Lambert

Cory Lambert wasted no time in the rubber game in getting thoroughly and utterly destroyed, loading the bases with the first three Condors he saw before plating a run with a wild pitch and three more when Chris Strohm took him so deep to left, Manny Fernandez didn’t even bother looking after it. Another sad day at the office, huh, Manny? I know the feeling.

Amazingly, the Condors stopped hitting after that and the Coons began to nibble away. Lambert hit a single in the bottom 3rd, followed by a Maldonado single, Brito ripped an RBI double, and another run scored on a groundout. Nickas (!) singled in Anderson in the fourth, getting back to 4-3. The inning after that, Maldo was nicked by Quintero to begin the frame, and Brito whacked another double, and where had THAT bat been all those years in AAA?? Manny tied the score at four with a single to right, and Tony Morales made it 5-4 Coons with a sac fly before the inning ran dry. Lambert pitched another scoreless inning, then was hit for in the bottom 6th, in which Nickas (single), Maldo (walk), and Brito (single) loaded the bags with one gone. Manny Fernandez ripped a ball over Strohm’s head for a 2-run single, 7-4, after which ex-Critter David Fernandez was brought in to restore order, but allowed an RBI single to Morales instead. At this point the Coons tried to get too clever, batted Scott Daiker for Balaski to counter the southpaw, and instead cashed two pops over the infield to end the inning. Hunter and Maldonado snapped hits off David Fernandez for a run in the seventh, and with a Morales jack off Armando Zaragoza the Raccoons reached double digits in the bottom 8th. 10-4 Raccoons. Maldonado 2-3, BB, RBI; Brito 3-5, 2 2B, RBI; Fernandez 2-5, 4 RBI; Morales 2-4, HR, 3 RBI; Hunter 2-4, 2 2B; Nickas 2-4, 2B, RBI;

Look, Maud! We won a season series!! – Can we print something about that??

Raccoons (49-54) vs. Bayhawks (41-62) – July 27-29, 2040

The next hopeless team followed right on the Condors’ heels, with the Bayhawks actually already having lost the season series to the Critters (5-1). They were last in the South, eighth in runs scored and tenth in runs allowed. Their run differential was a more modest -53. Since trading Dan Schneller almost a month ago, they had entered a tailspin, posting a 5-16 record in July so far.

Projected matchups:
Nelson Moreno (2-5, 3.72 ERA) vs. Noe Candeloro (4-10, 5.80 ERA)
Sal Lozano (0-1, 5.40 ERA) vs. Gilberto Rendon (6-5, 3.86 ERA)
Raffaello Sabre (8-6, 3.44 ERA) vs. Jose Moreno (7-10, 4.50 ERA)

The series would open with the only southpaw of the week.

Dr. Padilla reported that Cosmo Trevino had a mildly sprained ankle that could be played on, but would irk him for about two weeks. Well, he shall play then – cuddle time’s over in Portland. He would get Friday off because of the left-hander, however.

Game 1
SFB: SS J. Gonzalez – 1B S. Ayala – CF M. Hall – C Cedillo – 3B Barcia – LF Oshiita – RF Greer – 2B Levinson – P Candeloro
POR: 3B Maldonado – 2B Brito – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – 1B Kilgallen – SS Hunter – CF Hooge – RF Daiker – P N. Moreno

A hit, two walks, a balk – and somehow no runs; Nelson Moreno had a first inning from hell, but Jorge Gonzalez was caught stealing after that leadoff walk and that would cost the Baybirds down the road. Instead, Portland went up 1-0 on a Maldonado triple and another hit by Brito. Moreno survived another leadoff walk in the second inning, which also saw the first career homer by Scott Daiker, a 2-out solo deed that made it a 2-0 game. So far, so well. The third inning saw Ed Hooge getting hurt on a tumbling catch in center, requiring replacement by Balaski (with Daiker to centerfield), and three singles in the bottom 3rd that saw Tony Hunter bring in a run to make it 3-0.

After the early troubles, Nelson Moreno allowed no further hits through five innings, but also struck out only one batter in the first five, and the early mess had him up on 67 pitches. The 1-2-3 went down in order in the sixth for San Francisco, although the string of retirements ended in the seventh on a solo home run to right-center by Dick Oshiita. Marshall Greer grounded out, and although Moreno’s spot led off the bottom 7th in a 3-1 game, he was not batted for. That the Raccoons were short on players by now was not necessarily the main reason. He flew out to left before Maldo and Brito hit singles. Manny grounded to Tristan Levinson for a force at second base, and Kilmer flew out to shallow left to strand runners on the corners. Levinson, PH Dave Martinez, and Gonzalez were sat down in order by Nels in the eighth, including two strikeouts, ending an outing on a high note. Brent Clark then got the 3-1 lead for the ninth. Sal Ayala flew out to center, but Mike Hall singled to center. Eduardo Umanzor batted for Rey Cedillo against the brown-clad southpaw, but hit a grounder to Tony Hunter for a 6-4-3 game-ender. 3-1 Furballs. Maldonado 2-4, 3B; Brito 2-4, 2B, RBI; Moreno 8.0 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 3 BB, 4 K, W (3-5) and 1-2;

Poor Hoogey had broken his hindpaw in the game, and was off to the DL for four weeks, which should be enough as Dr. Padilla opined. The Raccoons brought up Alex Castro, hitting a meager .222 in AAA, as a warm body replacement. The outfielder, age 29, had made 12 appearances in ’38, hitting .391/.481/.609 in an obvious release of hot air.

Game 2
SFB: CF M. Hall – SS Greer – 3B Barcia – RF D. Martinez – 1B S. Ayala – 2B Levinson – C Umanzor – LF Balderrama – P G. Rendon
POR: CF Maldonado – 3B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – 2B Brito – SS Hunter – 1B Anderson – P Lozano

Sal Ayala doubled in a pair off Lozano in the first, but Lozano would take it out on former Raccoon Gilberto Rendon in the bottom 2nd. Morales and Brito had gone to the corners in the inning, Tony Hunter made it 2-1 on a double, and while Anderson grounded out to first base, Lozano zinged a 2-out, 2-run single to right to give himself a lead. Martinez’ throw to home plate allowed Lozano to second base, from where he scored on a Maldonado single. Maldo stole second, but Cosmo grounded out, leaving the score at 4-2. The following inning, Rendon had the bags around him filled with Manny and Morales on singles as well as a full-count walk to Balaski. Brito hit a sac fly, followed by Hunter hitting a single to restock the bases. Anderson then hit into a double play. On to the fourth, Martinez hit a leadoff double off the fence, eventually scoring on a wild pitch, narrowing the score to 5-3 again. Lozano hit a leadoff single in the bottom of the inning. Cosmo extended his hitting streak to 16 games with another single – he had never batted before his injury in the game against the Condors, so there hadn’t been a way to end it. Fernandez grounded out, Morales whiffed, and the two runners remained on board.

Lozano held up for 5.1 innings, getting Ayala out to begin the sixth before being removed on 94 pitches. Zabala retired five straight after that, whiffing three Bayhawks. The Raccoons had a chance to put the game away in the bottom 7th, with Brito, Hunter, and Kilgallen filling the bags against Juan Melendrez, but Maldonado grounded out to strand all of them. Regardless, Campbell and Clark put the game away in just six more batters. 5-3 Coons. Maldonado 2-5, RBI; Trevino 2-4, BB; Morales 2-5; Brito 3-3, 2 2B, RBI; Hunter 2-2, 2 BB, 2B, RBI; Kilgallen (PH) 1-1;

First major-league W for Sal Lozano, then.

Game 3
SFB: SS J. Gonzalez – 1B S. Ayala – RF D. Martinez – CF M. Hall – C Cedillo – 3B Barcia – LF Oshiita – 2B Levinson – P J. Moreno
POR: CF Maldonado – 3B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – 2B Brito – 1B Kilgallen – SS Hunter – P Sabre

Cosmo made it 17 with a single in the first, joining Maldonado on the bags just before Manny belted a 3-run homer for a really quick lead. The Coons put another two on base in the inning, but Hunter grounded out to strand them. Maldonado then knocked a triple in the bottom 2nd, with Cosmo flicking another single to run the tally to 4-0. By the fourth, Sabre was on a 1-hitter with two walks and four strikeouts, while Maldonado had the difficult parts of the cycle ticked off, lining a gap double with two outs and nobody aboard in the bottom of that inning. Cosmo walked, but Manny popped out to leave them on.

The sixth saw the Bayhawks the closest to scoring as they had been in the game, with Ayala drawing a walk and Martinez shooting a double through Trevino to put two in scoring position with one out in the inning. Mike Hall flew out poorly to shallow right, though, with Balaski shooing back Ayala, and Cedillo grounded out to short, leaving them still shut out in the middle of the sixth. Maldo then came up in the bottom of the inning with two outs and nobody on, but couldn’t hit the ball fat enough and instead singled to left, completing the third leg of the cycle, missing only the bomb. Cosmo hit another single, but Manny again stranded them, grounding out to Levinson, whom Sabre would nick with two outs in the seventh. It came apart late for Sabre here, who while he didn’t allow a run in seven innings, also lost command more and more through the innings and ran numerous long counts, leaving him over 100 pitches through seven and thus out of the game.

Balaski got on base in the bottom 7th, ensuring that Maldonado would get another shot in the bottom 8th, which would start with the #8 batter. First though, the Bayhawks ripped a triple (Gonzalez) and two singles (Hall, Cedillo) off Lindstrom in the eighth, getting on the board with one run. Maldonado then faced right-hander Josh Irwin in the eighth with two outs and nobody on base. He hit another ball hard – but again not upwards. A single to center put him at four hits for the day. Cosmo lined out to left, sending the game to the pen. Brent Clark had been the primary closer since Rico Sanchez had been traded away, but he had been out a lot this week, including both of the last two games. With Oshiita leading off, the Raccoons went with Chuck Jones, who got the K on the lefty bat, but then walked Levinson and was replaced with Campbell once Umanzor showed up in the box. Campbell gave up a single on the first pitch. Marshall Greer batted for Gonzalez and flew out to left. Ayala fell to 1-2 before putting a 2-out single into shallow right. Levinson came around to score, with Umanzor absent-mindedly making to third base, thinking the ball had beaten Balaski. Spoiler: it hadn’t, and Balaski threw out Umanzor at third base to end the game and complete the sweep. 4-2 Raccoons. Maldonado 4-4, BB, 3B, 2B; Trevino 3-4, BB, RBI; Balaski 2-3, BB; Sabre 7.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 3 BB, 4 K, W (9-6);

In other news

July 24 – 38-year-old BOS CL Gilberto Castillo (3-4, 3.02 ERA, 26 SV) has his 300th career save in a 6-4 win over the Falcons. Castillo, a 3-time All Star, spent most of his 16 major league seasons with the Warriors.
July 24 – LF/1B Melvin Hernandez (.284, 11 HR, 49 RBI) is swapped from the Warriors to the Cyclones for a prospect.
July 25 – The Thunder beat the Loggers, 13-9, with six runs being driven in on three hits by RF/1B/LF John Marz (.282, 11 HR, 50 RBI).
July 25 – The Loggers acquire Denver CL Kurt Crater (2-5, 2.31 ERA, 26 SV) in a deal for two prospects. The package includes #79 prospect C Amari Thompson.
July 26 – SAC RF/LF/1B Carlos Cortes (.287, 22 HR, 74 RBI) helps tear down the Buffaloes with six base hits in an 11-6 win. Ironically, the slugger hits six singles and drives in only one run
July 27 – Denver’s OF/1B Rich de Luna (.313, 4 HR, 51 RBI) hits a triple in a 6-5 loss to the Miners to reach a 20-game hitting streak.
July 28 – CIN 1B Jamie King (.345, 23 HR, 65 RBI) has a 20-game hitting streak, too, getting a ninth-inning single in a 9-8 loss in Dallas.
July 28 – The Buffaloes take on SP John Kennedy (2-7, 6.69 ERA) from the Warriors, parting with two prospects, including #86 SP Juan Arrocha.
July 29 – The Rebs acquire SP Keith Black (12-7, 3.32 ERA) from the Pacifics, parting with a basket of four prospects.

FL Player of the Week: SFW/CIN LF/1B Melvin Hernandez (.293, 15 HR, 56 RBI), hitting .423 (11-26) with 4 HR, 7 RBI – one game played with the Warriors, five with the Cyclones
CL Player of the Week: TIJ RF/1B/LF Willie Ojeda (.329, 7 HR, 41 RBI), batting .522 (12-23) with 2 HR, 8 RBI

Complaints and stuff

Just like that, the deconstructing Raccoons posted a 5-1 week. (extends both arms and ceremoniously proclaims) Baseball!!

To be fair, the competition this week was appalling. It will get stiffer next week, with a 2-week road trip starting in Atlanta and then circling through Indy, Milwaukee, and Sacramento on the way home. We’d only be home for a 3-game set against the Caps after that before the next road trip.

Second year in a row we won eight of nine against the Bayhawks, too.

Fun Fact: Carlos Cortes’ 6-hit game on Thursday marked the 300th total occurrence of an individual no-hitter, cycle, 6-hit, or 3-homer* game in ABL history.

Amazingly, the Raccoons have the highest total there with 25 entries into the record books: eight no-hitters, six cycles, seven 6-hit games, and four 3-homer* games.

*Includes of course the 4-homer game by Craig Bowen in 2007.

[DD Martin]

Originally Posted by Westheim

I don't think we'll make it to the end of the season without him.

Too bad I’d think you should be able to get a decent haul for him even if he is a rental. But I forget you have the A/B free agent compensation going so that might be better. Maybe a mediocre (but not protected pick team) will sign him like Washington, Richmond or Cincy

[Westheim]

Trade

Monday, the Raccoons made a trade with the Wolves, the second of the month after we had already left them with Troy Greenway, who, I am delighted to tell you, found his bat again, and through his first dozen games with the cuddly wannabe dogs down I-5 was hitting .357/.426/.500.

What a great time to be alive.

Anyway, the Raccoons acquired left-hander Ian Wilson (2-2, 1.79 ERA) from the Wolves for some gum stuck under our cleats, and with that gum I mean 28-year-old outfielder Scott Daiker (.121, 1 HR, 3 RBI), a clump of nothing in a brown hat.

The benefit of the left-handed Texan Ian Wilson – who was a Raccoons pick at #39 in the 2027 draft before seamlessly sliding into minor-league free agency six years later – was that he could be used as a starter if things got any tougher. His stamina was low, but we’re in he “flinging **** at the wall and trying to get something stick” phase of our ongoing rotation remodeling. If a guy goes five allowing two runs it’s better than a guy going five allowing five runs.

The cautionary advice before showing any kind of ill-advised euphoria would be to consider that Wilson is 32 and will be going to arbitration until he’s 34.

Raccoons (52-54) @ Knights (59-44) – July 30-August 1, 2040

The Knights had already taken the season series, 5-1, but the league said the Raccoons had to play them anyway, so *fine*. They led the South, had won six in a row, and sat second in runs scored and fourth in runs allowed in the league. All that I could do was wish them the best of luck if they made it to the CLCS against the damn Elks, even with SP Jon Pereira and 2B Jesus Matos lost for the season already.

Projected matchups:
Angelo Montano (2-6, 6.67 ERA) vs. Jimmy Driver (7-8, 3.33 ERA)
Ian Wilson (2-2, 1.79 ERA) vs. Chris Lulay (9-5, 3.42 ERA)
Nelson Moreno (3-5, 3.39 ERA) vs. Brad Santry (14-5, 3.17 ERA)

Right, left, right as far as their starters were concerned. We’d not see Ryan Bedrosian, who had pitched on Sunday, winning *consecutive games* for the first time this season.

Wilson took over the rotation slot of Cory Lambert (2-1, 7.20 ERA), who would get a chance to reacquaint himself with the gators in Florida. The Raccoons brought back 1B Damian Salazar, batting .314 for the Alley Cats and .137 in Portland, to make up the numbers. Picking another outfielder, or any position player, from AAA was hard; somehow the entire AAA team already seemed to be with us…

Game 1
POR: CF Maldonado – 3B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – 2B Brito – SS Hunter – 1B Anderson – P Montano
ATL: CF N. Velez – SS Crim – 2B Majano – LF Inoa – C Horner – 1B Krumholz – RF Hester – 3B B. Moore – P Driver

Montano did as well as expected against a formidable offense, which is to say that he shuffled the bags full in the bottom of the first inning and then gave up a 2-out double to Adam Horner for the first three runs of the game. He walked Bill Moore to begin the bottom 2nd, then allowed three straight 2-out singles to Joe Crim, Alex Majano (grmbl grmbl), and Luis Inoa before Horner lined out hard to Manny Fernandez. The Knights scored another run on a walk and three singles in the fourth, and left the bases loaded on Zachary Krumholz’ grounder to Cosmo. The Raccoons, who had no way of giving as much as Montano got, were mostly reduced to Balaski and Hunter, who both reached base in each of the first two runs through the lineup. Hunter drove in Balaski in the second, but they were both stranded when Montano grounded out in the fourth, leaving the team down (then) 4-1.

Then, in a 5-1 game in the top 5th, Driver seemed to lose it from one second to the next. Maldonado hit a leadoff jack, after which Driver loaded the bases with Cosmo, Manny, and Tony Morales. And as soon as my whiskers showed some mild excitement, Balaski and Brito struck out and Hunter grounded out to Joe Crim to strand all three runners. Bottom 5th, Billy Hester ripped a leadoff triple and scored on a sac fly, and the Raccoons kept sending Montano back to the mound, which was at least borderline animal cruelty. He wasn’t seen after the sixth, though, with the Knights tacking on another run with three singles off Mauricio Garavito in the seventh. The Raccoons never mounted another threat. 7-2 Knights. Balaski 3-5; Hunter 2-4, 2B, RBI; Salazar (PH) 1-1;

The 17-game hitting streak of Cosmo Trevino ended in this game. He walked twice and reached on an error once, neither event saving him from posting an 0-for-3 at the end of the day.

Angelo, your ERA is now 6.98; what do you have to say for yourself? – M-hm. – A-hah. – Yes, those mean other teams, continuing to whack you around like that. Terrible. – Well, all I can say is that once your ERA goes over seven, I’ll have Dr. Padilla cut your ******* tail off.

Game 2
POR: 2B Brito – SS Hunter – 3B Maldonado – C Kilmer – CF Kilgallen – RF Balaski – 1B Salazar – LF Castro – P Wilson
ATL: CF N. Velez – 2B Crim – LF Inoa – 1B Krumholz – C Horner – 3B B. Moore – RF Ledford – SS Majano – P Lulay

Wilson was the 12th different pitcher to start a game for the Raccoons in 2040. He was spotted a 5-run lead in the second inning in a giant explosion of Chris Lulay that involved 1-out singles by Kilgallen, Balaski, and Salazar for the first run, then after a poor out by Alex Castro – and by the way, who are all these people on the roster?? – Wilson getting nailed with two outs by Lulay, who proceeded to give up a shot over the fence to Jose Brito. GRAAAAAAAND SLAAAAAAAAMMM!!!!

While Luis Inoa hurt himself on a defensive play the inning after and was replaced with George Hwathorne, the old foe, the Raccoons got a string of scoreless innings from their latest dumpster grab. Wilson allowed two hits, hit a guy, and struck out two in the first four innings, and looked never in danger, then had the game ostensibly put away for him when Jeff Kilmer raked Lulay for a 3-run homer to left in the fifth, which understandably ended Lulay’s playtime. Reliever Rich Ray then gave up a string of 2-out hits to the bottom of the order, with Salazar doubling home Balaski before scoring on Castro’s single himself, 10-0, running up a second 5-spot on the Knights. Kilmer wasn’t done though, smashing a 2-run piece off Ray in the sixth inning.

A brief brush with rain then cut into Wilson’s rhythm and left him on fumes by the seventh, with Lindstrom replacing him after a 2-out single by recently-shaved Brad Ledford. Lindstrom got out of the seventh, but was ticked for two runs in the eighth, including a Krumholz homer to left. Chuck Jones finished the game with a scoreless ninth. 12-2 Furballs. Brito 2-5, HR, 2B, 4 RBI; Hunter 2-5, 2B; Kilmer 2-4, BB, 2 HR, 5 RBI; Balaski 2-5; Salazar 3-5, 2B, 2 RBI; Castro 2-4, RBI; Wilson 6.2 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 3 K, W (3-2);

I’ll take that for a Coons debut. I hope Nelson Moreno was inspired.

Game 3
POR: CF Maldonado – 3B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – 2B Brito – SS Hunter – 1B Anderson – P Moreno
ATL: CF N. Velez – SS Crim – 1B J. Garcia – RF Ledford – 3B B. Moore – C Krumholz – 2B Majano – LF Hawthorne – P Santry

Moore’s leadoff double led to a Knights run in the bottom 2nd, the first marker on the board, but the Raccoons woke up with Hunter and Anderson singles to begin the third inning. Moreno bunted them over, Maldonado was nicked, and Cosmo tied it up with a single to right. Two runs then scored on Manny’s single to center, the runners reached scoring position on Nelson Velez’ bad throw, and a passed ball charged to Zachary Krumholz moved Cosmo across for yet another run. Tony Morales got Manny home with a grounder to short as the Raccoons put up their third 5-spot of the series.

The Coons’ offense stopped at that point, but up 5-1 we took some time out of our day to intently watch Nelson Moreno, a young guy and genuine talent, who tried to navigate a tough lineup with a solid lead, trying to not get brutalized. It worked rather well, with the Knights getting only the occasional runner after their second-inning rising, although the counts went a bit longer as the game entered the middle innings. Not princely economical, Moreno needed 89 pitches to get through six innings of a 2-hitter, which was frankly too much. The Knights made three quick outs in the seventh, then got a leadoff single when Majano hit a ball over Brito’s head in the eighth. Hawthorne dumped a ball into a double play, 6-4-3, but that was the end for Moreno after 98 pitches, with lefty pinch-hitter Neil Clark arriving in the batter’s box. The Coons went to Brent Clark thanks to a surfeit of lefty bats on the horizon, with Clark getting Clark on a grounder to complete eight. Manny Fernandez doubled home two runs in the ninth inning against Raul de la Rosa after five innings of sweet slumber, and Brent Clark finished the game without funny accidents. 7-1 Coons. Fernandez 2-4, BB, 2B, 4 RBI; Brito 2-4, 3B; Anderson 3-4, 2B; Moreno 7.2 IP, 3 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 4 K, W (4-5);

Raccoons (54-55) @ Indians (40-68) – August 2-5, 2040

The Raccoons already wished for the season to be over pretty hard, but how did the Indians feel? They were in last place, 30 games out, and were at the bottom of the pile in both runs allowed *and* runs scored in the Continental League. Their offense was so bad, they barely scored 3.4 runs a game. Their run differential had potential to reach -300 by the end of the year, already standing at -178. For the year, the Raccoons led the season series rather narrowly given all that, 4-3.

Projected matchups:
Sal Lozano (1-1, 4.94 ERA) vs. Ayden Cobb (1-4, 4.06 ERA)
Raffaello Sabre (9-6, 3.27 ERA) vs. Jake Jackson (7-11, 4.19 ERA)
Angelo Montano (2-7, 6.98 ERA) vs. Alex Flores (4-11, 4.33 ERA)
Ian Wilson (3-2, 1.56 ERA) vs. Manuel Herrera (7-12, 4.66 ERA)

We would see exclusively right-handers in this long series, with their only southpaw, Eric Peck (7-10, 5.36 ERA) already having been whacked around on Wednesday.

Game 1
POR: CF Maldonado – 3B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – 2B Brito – SS Hunter – 1B Salazar – P Lozano
IND: CF Crocker – 1B Dodson – 3B Hutson – SS D. Serrato – 2B E. Vargas – LF Zimmerman – RF Damron – C Alfonso – P Cobb

The game was a drag in the early innings, with nobody getting much hitting in, despite neither pitcher sparkling with stuff or any other nice quality. This suddenly changed in the fourth inning, where a Tony Hunter error opened the floodgates for the Indians, who got singles from Dan Hutson and Enrique Vargas for one run, then a homer to left from Jason Zimmerman for another three. Lozano was not seen again after that inning, consulting Dr. Padilla for a sore elbow instead. Excellent!

Top 6th, the Critters loaded the bases with Manny, Morales, and Balaski, then brought up Jose Brito, who was the tying run and had already smacked a slam this week. This time he popped out to second base, and the Raccoons only scored when Pat Dodson flubbed a 2-out grounder by Tony Hunter for a run. New pitcher Felipe Jacquez then walked Salazar with the bags full, which was genuinely hard to do, but struck out PH Matt Kilgallen to end the inning, still up 4-2. Three singles by Cosmo, Morales, and Balaski scratched out another run for Portland in the seventh, but again Brito had all his coming-through done for the week and grounded out to strand the tying and go-ahead runs. Jacquez was still around to give up a leadoff double to Hunter in the eighth, then yanked for fellow righty Luke Moses, whom Kilmer dinked for a pinch-hit single to tie the score at four with one out. Maldo popped out, Cosmo singled, and Manny regrettably lined out to Dan Hutson to end the frame. Portland put Morales and Balaski on base to begin the ninth, then choked with three poor outs against Marcus Goode, who would have the bases loaded with two outs in the 10th with Cosmo doubling, Manny being walked intentionally, and Morales squeaking out a single. Balaski was next, and it didn’t matter that he was an unlikely rookie; he was batting, because the Raccoons were out of bench players at this point. Balaski cracked a liner up the middle, it fell in, and two runs scored to break the tie! Steve Nickas then struck out against Mike Haertl, sending the game to Brent Clark in the bottom of the inning. While Hutson hit a 1-out single, Dave Serrato hit into a 6-4-3 to put the game away. 6-4 Raccoons. Trevino 3-6, 2B; Fernandez 2-5, BB, 2B; Morales 3-4, 2 BB; Balaski 4-6, 3 RBI; Kilmer (PH) 1-1, RBI; Zabala 2.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 0 K; Campbell 2.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K, W (2-0);

Back at .500 …!?

Game 2
POR: CF Maldonado – 2B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – SS Hunter – 1B Anderson – 3B Nickas – P Sabre
IND: CF Crocker – 3B Hutson – RF Garbinski – 1B Dodson – C E. Thompson – 2B E. Vargas – SS D. Serrato – LF Zimmerman – P J. Jackson

Portland got out and scored first, with Cosmo drawing a walk, stealing a base, and then scoring on singles by Fernandez and Kilmer. Then Balaski hit into a double play to short-circuit the inning… At least Sabre didn’t cause any immediate grief, and the Critters tacked on a run in the third, in which Maldo whacked a triple into the right-center gap and scored on Cosmo’s soft single, 2-0. Balaski, Hunter, and Anderson would then load the bases in the fourth inning, with nobody out, which was enough reason to be filled with foreboding, but also with .133 menace Steve Nickas up next. Jackson got two strikes on him rather quick, then gave up an RBI single anyway, growing the lead to 3-0. Sabre’s sac fly ran it to 4-0, and Maldo legged out an infield single to fill the bags again for Cosmo, who found his way into a 3-6-1 double play after stumbling out of the box…

Considering the Indians’ offense, the game was probably put in the books and the Critters back over .500 when Bill Balaski smashed a 370-footer to right in the fifth inning, binning Jackson with Manny and Kilmer on base and nobody out. Sabre would not amount to a shutout, running out of steam after seven innings of 3-hit ball and 107 pitches. With him out, the Raccoons reached 9-0 in the eighth with Maldo and Cosmo reaching, and Manny (groundout) and Kilmer (sac fly) each logging a run-scoring out. The Indians never amounted to anything much, with Garavito and Lindstrom covering the last two innings. 9-0 Raccoons! Maldonado 3-4, BB, 3B; Trevino 2-4, BB, RBI; Fernandez 2-5, 2B, RBI; Balaski 3-5, HR, 3 RBI; Sabre 7.0 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 7 K, W (10-6);

At this rate we might even get rid of our negative run differential. It’s at -7 halfway through this series.

For now, Berto came off the DL and Steve Nickas, still batting .147, was waived and DFA’ed.

Game 3
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – CF Maldonado – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – SS Hunter – 1B Anderson – P Montano
IND: 2B E. Vargas – 1B Dodson – 3B Hutson – SS D. Serrato – CF Zimmerman – RF Damron – C Alfonso – LF O’Leary – P A. Flores

Portland took the lead in the second inning, Balaski singling home Jeff Kilmer, who reached second base when Nick O’Leary booted his fly to left for two bases. Montano then faced the minimum through three innings, aided by not one, but two double plays turned behind him. Top 4th, Kilmer drew a leadoff walk. Hunter walked as well, and Montano flicked a 2-out single to load the bases for Berto, who fell to 1-2, but then dropped a single in shallow left-center. Kilmer scored, Hunter scored, but Montano misread the play and was tagged out between second and third to end the inning, but not until after Tony Hunter crossed the plate, putting the score at 3-0.

While the Raccoons put up a modicum of offense, Montano was dominating the Indians, which was the real trouble for Indianapolis. Through six, Montano allowed one hit and two walks, despite being a replacement-level left-hander against a lineup with eight righty batters. Then, all of a sudden, Montano allowed leadoff singles to Dodson and Hutson, and also walked Serrato. After some kind advice from the pitching coach, Montano was left in there – if the kid’s ever going to figure it out, then he probably will against these Arrowheads! Jason Zimmerman promptly grounded into a run-scoring double play, 4-6-3 on the field and 3-1 on the board, and Keith Damron hacked himself out to strand Dan Hutson at third base, completing the inning.

Top 8th, Maldonado and Fernandez reached scoring position leading off with meaty hits against Alex Flores, who until now also had nursed a 3-hitter (albeit with five walks). Kilmer was walked to get forces at every base, but Balaski hit a fly to O’Leary that was deep enough for Maldo to diddle home, and Tony Hunter whacked an RBI double in left-center. Oliver Anderson’s groundout scored another run, 6-1. Then Montano clapped a 2-out single off Felipe Jacquez to drive in Hunter. The inning ended with Berto flying out to Damron, and the Indians put four of the next five batters on base to chase Montano in the bottom of the eighth anyway. Alex Ramirez conceded a run on a fielder’s choice against Hutson, who narrowly beat out the throw from second, then got Serrato out on a grounder to third, maintaining a 7-3 lead. A throwing error by Berto led to an unearned run in the bottom of the ninth, but it was too late for Indy to make a substantial run at the Raccoons anymore. 7-4 Critters. Montano 7.1 IP, 5 H, 3 R, 3 ER, 5 BB, 4 K, W (3-7) and 2-4, RBI; Ramirez 1.2 IP, 1 H, 1 R, 0 ER, 1 BB, 0 K, SV (1);

No Portland position player had more than one base hit and somehow we still won behind Montano…? At that rate I was buying into the idea of winning our last 50 games outright and beating the damn Elks to the playoffs!

Game 4
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – CF Maldonado – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – SS Hunter – 1B Salazar – P Wilson
IND: 2B E. Vargas – 1B Dodson – 3B Hutson – SS D. Serrato – CF Zimmerman – C Alfonso – RF Crocker – LF O’Leary – P M. Herrera

Sunday arrived and Ian Wilson drowned, just like that. Vargas and Dodson opened with singles, and Balaski threw out Vargas at third base on the Dodson single. Dan Hutson then hit a jack to left for a 2-0 deficit. Serrato, Zimmerman, and Edwin Alfonso filled the bases with a single and two walks before Nick Crocker and Nick O’Leary both hacked himself out to strand three. Wilson issued two full-count walks in the second inning and we didn’t know much, but we were sure that he would not be around for long in this game. He made it through four for sure, despite leadoff singles by O’Leary and Herrera (!), but was able to bail out after Enrique Vargas hit into a double play.

It was tempting to hit for Wilson in the fifth after Salazar’s groundout had moved Balaski and Hunter to scoring position, but the Critters left him in there. Herrera fell to 3-0 against him, then Wilson poked and popped out, which immediately made my fur that tiny bit grayer. Berto lined out to Dodson, and the Raccoons remained off the board. Zimmerman then walked and Edwin Alfonso hit a jack to get rid of Wilson anyway in the bottom of the fifth, now with the score at 4-0. The bullpen came apart for three runs in the seventh inning, all unearned thanks to Chuck Jones dropping a feed from Oliver Anderson at first base. Ramirez allowed two runs, Jones conceded one, while the Indians also landed three hits in the inning.

The Raccoons were still being shut out in the eighth when Cosmo hit a 2-out double to left. He also tweaked his knee sliding into second base and required replacement by Brito. Brent Clark gave up another run on a Vargas double and Hutson single in the bottom 8th, and Fernandez, Morales, and Balaski all made quick outs in the ninth inning to hand a 5-hit shutout to Manuel Herrera. 8-0 Indians. Trevino 3-4, 2B;

Reality check – completed!

In other news

July 30 – SFW SP Vinny Olguin (2-5, 4.84 ERA) 3-hits the Miners in a 4-0 shutout.
July 30 – The Wolves acquire SP John Gano (8-6, 3.45 ERA) from the Warriors for a prospect.
July 30 – 3B/SS/RF Marshall Greer (.225, 4 HR, 34 RBI) is traded from San Francisco to Topkea in exchange for MR Michael Zabek (5-0, 3.80 ERA) and #24 outfield prospect Jose Casas.
August 2 – The hitting streak of Cincy 1B Jamie King (.352, 23 HR, 69 RBI) reaches 25 games with two singles in a 9-4 loss to the Buffaloes.
August 3 – The Buffaloes make an end of CIN 1B Jamie King (.350, 23 HR, 69 RBI) being on a tear, holding him hitless in a 3-2 win over the Cyclones and keeping King to 25 games of straight hitting.
August 4 – OCT INF Al Martell (.278, 9 HR, 51 RBI) has five hits, including a triple, and drives in two runs in a 12-4 win over the Falcons.
August 4 – VAN CL Josh Boles (4-4, 2.59 ERA, 21 SV) is lost for the season with shoulder inflammation.
August 5 – ATL SP David Farris (4-6, 3.61 ERA) is out for the season after tearing his labrum. Farris had pitched two no-hit innings in a game against the Bayhawks on Saturday, that went extra innings in scoreless fashion, with San Francisco *still* hitless thanks to splendid relief by Ruben Vela (3-2, 4.40 ERA) and Matt May (4-2, 2.74 ERA, 1 SV). But the Knights still couldn’t score, then were defeated by SFB CF/RF Mike Hall (.284, 5 HR, 48 RBI) and LF/RF/1B Dick Oshiita (.290, 6 HR, 27 RBI) plonking a pair of singles for a 1-0 walkoff.

FL Player of the Week: SAC 1B/LF/RF Eddie Moreno (.254, 3 HR, 13 RBI), hitting .500 (14-28) with 3 HR, 10 RBI
CL Player of the Week: CHA INF/LF/RF Jose Farfan (.329, 15 HR, 68 RBI), batting .448 (13-29) with 1 HR, 6 RBI

FL Hitter of the Month: SAC LF/RF Mike Preble (.340, 22 HR, 74 RBI), hitting .395 with 9 HR, 19 RBI
CL Hitter of the Month: NYC CF/LF Joe Besaw (.261, 10 HR, 73 RBI), batting .349 with 6 HR, 28 RBI
FL Pitcher of the Month: CIN SP/MR Jeff Horstmeier (9-5, 3.65 ERA, 8 SV), pitching to a 5-0 record, 2.27 ERA, and 18 K
CL Pitcher of the Month: OCT SP Alan Fleming (10-5, 3.70 ERA), pitching for a 4-0 record, 3.18 ERA, 20 K
FL Rookie of the Month: PIT LF/CF Bill Reeves (.263, 4 HR, 30 RBI), hitting .297 with 1 HR, 11 RBI
CL Rookie of the Month: CHA SP Danny Tankersley (8-4, 4.09 ERA), pitching to a 3-0 record, 2.60 ERA, 17 K

Complaints and stuff

The FL Player of the Week? That’s the #2 prospect making a splash only 17 games into his major league career.

None of his hitting in the minor leagues has hinted at Bill Balaski being a .300 hitter in the major leagues. He hit .226 in AAA as recently as last season. With a .584 OPS, that was.

Cosmo now has a bad knee in addition to a bad ankle. They’re on different legs, so maybe we’ll just let him sit out a few games…

We need a spot starter on Tuesday, because Lozano won’t be ready. Zabala has been set aside to make that spot start, so we don’t have to make a roster move. Zabala would be the 13th different starting pitcher used by the Critters this year.

This is as good a time as any to give a first glimpse about who is under contract for how much longer (but a more complete rundown will follow after the free agency period arrives in the fall). Cosmo keeps having the richest contract on the team, and is fixed for ’41, with a player option in ’42. Manny Fernandez has three more years at our leisure, then a team option after that. Bernie Chavez has a team option for ’41, which will be picked up, as has Jermaine Campbell, but his will be not.

Then there’s Maldonado (locked onto the team through ’45), Ramirez (signed that 3-year deal out of Cuba, but will be under team control even beyond that), and then you have one more year at $600k for Berto, and that is really all that is left for guaranteed contracts. Kilmer and Morales twice and once more, respectively. Nettles reached three years of service time on the DL now. A few people make more than the minimum right now, but nothing to write home about, and everybody not listed here so far is either under team control or will be a free agent after the season.

The latter group includes Sabre, Dominy (welp), Hoogey, and Garavito (thank goodness).

Fun Fact: Only once, in 2029, did the Raccoons line up 13 different stating pitchers.

Mark Roberts was a soldier, started 34 times, and posted good numbers (14-11, 3.42 ERA). Everybody else was a ******* mess. Second in the list of reliable options was Yusneldan “Dan” Delgadillo, making 22 starts… and that was before he went completely into the *******. Tom Shumway started 16 times and was great until pulling a Dominy with a 7-4 record and sub-2 ERA (same for Rico Gutierrez for 11 starts, but with a 4-1 record), while Jamie O’Leary made 16 starts and each week managed to be more **** than the one before and went 2-11.

Billy Ramm, Trevor Draper, Dave Martinez? Not the outfielder Dave Martinez by the way. Who are these people even? Can you completely forget about a pitcher that started 10-ish games only ten years ago? Apparently so!

This year, only Sabre has made it to 20+ starts yet. Bernie Chavez should get there once he comes off the DL. Montano and Moreno might make it there right at the end of the season, unless more injuries intervene or Montano keeps getting worse and I’m cutting his tail off. Bedrosian started 19 games before getting traded. Dominy started 12 before getting hurt.

An then there is the endless parade of shambles of Sal Lozano, Nelson Fonseca, Cory Lambert, Jose de Leon, Jared Ottinger, and Ian Wilson that just keeps on giving. So far the team has used a total of 24 pitchers and 20 position players. The only thing limiting more growth in those totals is the fact that almost all the AAA team *is already here*.

+++

With the demise of the Thanks feature on the forums, I’d like to take the opportunity to thank YOU lot for thumbing up these posts of cerebral diarrhea of the worst OOTP player ever about 6,000 times in the last eight years-plus. Every little one of them kept the wheels spinning, in the game and outside of it. Now that this doesn’t work anymore, please consider just offering some basic compassion from time to time (especially in the next few seasons), or maybe a dank Raccoons meme.

Or just put a bottle o’ booze on the table once in a while. I don’t know. Your pick.

[Bub13]

A 5-2 week? To quote that famous tv insurance salesman Peyton Manning, "Epic comeback starts right now."

[Westheim]

Originally Posted by Bub13

A 5-2 week? To quote that famous tv insurance salesman Peyton Manning, "Epic comeback starts right now."

Did I mention we play the damn Elks another six times? Gap's really only 9 1/2, then!

Delusion is great.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (57-56) @ Loggers (56-56) – August 6-8, 2040

As the battle raged for third place in the CL North – … no, I don’t think they cared either. But they were trying to look good for the home crowd at least, I’d guess. They were fifth in runs scored, seventh in runs allowed, leading the league in stolen bases and sitting second in bullpen ERA, while they were in the bottom three in home runs and defense. They only had one injury though (Joseph Ronan), so nothing was in the way of insufferable Ted Del Vecchio tearing the hapless Critters a couple o’ new ones. Milwaukee led the season series, 7-5.

Projected matchups:
Nelson Moreno (4-5, 3.15 ERA) vs. Sergio Piedra (3-9, 5.11 ERA)
Juan Zabala (0-0, 2.89 ERA) vs. Carlos Padilla (7-7, 4.56 ERA)
Raffaello Sabre (10-6, 3.12 ERA) vs. Alfredo Vargas (8-12, 4.02 ERA)

There he was, the 13th starting pitcher lined up by the Raccoons this year. Have the baseball gods no mercy on us anymore?? The Loggers would line up a string of right-handers for the Coons to poke against.

Game 1
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Brito – SS Maldonado – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – CF Castro – 1B Salazar – P Moreno
MIL: C F. Gomez – CF Cannizzard – SS Del Vecchio – 3B Paul – RF Duncan – 1B Zitzner – 2B V. Acosta – LF J. Nelson – P Piedra

The Raccoons began the week in style, loading the bases in the first inning with nobody out before only scoring on a bases-loaded walk issued to Kilmer while Fernandez popped out and Balaski slapped into a double play. The bases were loaded again in the third inning on shy hits by Jose Brito and Manny Fernandez, then Jared Paul’s error on a potential double-play grounder by Jeff Kilmer with one out. Balaski, in the same spot asbefore, flew out to shallow center, keeping the runners pinned, and Alex Castro struck out, leaving them all stranded. Kilmer would actually hit into a double play to kill the fifth inning then, but with only Manny on base that time. All that kept the score 1-0, as did Nelson Moreno’s fine pitching, conceding as little as feasible to the Loggers. Early on, only a Justin Nelson double to lead off the bottom of the third was scary, but he was stranded at third base and the 1-0 lead remained intact through five. The weather did not, and it started to rain at the end of the fifth inning.

After an uneventful, if wet, sixth inning, the Raccoons put Maldonado and Fernandez on base in the seventh, but with two outs, and Kilmer didn’t know what to do with the runners and popped out to Vic Acosta. Bottom 7th, Moreno issued a leadoff walk to Nick Duncan, who was bunted to second base by ex-Critter Travis Zitzner (oh boy, the good old times…). Tony Lira hit for Acosta, grinded out another walk, and the bullpen got started. Too late – Nelson slapped a single up the middle off Nelson, and Duncan came around to score and tie the game. When Danny Valenzuela hit in the #9 hole, Chuck Jones was brought in, got a groundout, then gave up the remaining runners on hits by Felipe Gomez and Tim Cannizzard with two outs. In turn, the top 8th saw singles by the runts of the litter, Castro and Salazar, but no help coming forth from Anderson and Berto, who ended the inning with poor outs. The Loggers instead beat another run out of the sorry remains of Jermaine Campbell in the eighth, starting with a leadoff double by Jared Paul, but the Raccoons did bring the tying run to the plate in the ninth inning; Jose Brito doubled off Gualter Cymbron to begin the inning. Maldo struck out, but Manny singled, putting them on the corners for “Double Play” Kilmer, who struck out. Balaski did not, singing a ball through first-sacker Hector Alvarez for a 2-out, 2-run double. Tony Morales batted for Castro, slashed a single through the right side, Balaski raced around third base even against the strong arm of Nick Duncan, and scored to tie the game and take the loss away from Nelson Moreno …! Salazar flew out to center to end the inning against new pitcher Shane Jacobs, while the Raccoons sent Mauricio Garavito into the bottom 9th, where he was singled to death by Tyler Prestwood, Felipe Gomez, Dan Torri, and Jared Paul. 5-4 Loggers. Brito 3-5, 2B; Fernandez 3-5; Morales (PH) 1-1, RBI; Salazar 2-5;

Deflation.

Game 2
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Brito – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – SS Hunter – 1B Anderson – CF Kilgallen – P Zabala
MIL: 2B Lira – CF Cannizzard – 3B Paul – RF Duncan – 1B Zitzner – SS V. Acosta – C H. Alvarez – LF J. Nelson – P C. Padilla

Before the Raccoons had a base hit in the game, they had the bases loaded; Padilla nicked Tony Morales to begin the second inning, then walked Balaski and Tony Hunter in turn to fill the sacks, with nobody out of course, so I expected negative eleven runs from the endeavor, all the way. Anderson popped out in a full count, making me sigh out loud, but Kilgallen dropped a floater in front of Nelson for an RBI single. More wickedly, Zabala sloshed a ball through the left side for a 2-run single, with Tony Hunter probably dead at the plate if Nelson doesn’t throw the ball miles off target; he got an error for that, but the Coons got a 3-0 lead, growing to 5-0 on consecutive RBI singles by Berto and Brito, before the inning ended with Manny (K) and Morales (F7).

The immediate aftermath of the 5-run onslaught revolved around the thought of “alright, but how fast can they blow it”, when Zitzner, the first guy up in the bottom 2nd, reached on Hunter’s error and advanced on a passed ball. Somehow, Zabala stranded him at third base. The game calmed down a bit until the bottom three hit straight 2-out singles off Padilla in the fifth inning, giving Zabala a 6-0 lead on a third RBI. He completed five in the spot start on four hits, no runs, and six strikeouts, but was probably not going to go much deeper, given his lack of stamina. He struck out Cannizzard to begin the bottom 6th, with the batter getting ejected after getting into it with the umpire. Dan Torri would replace him. Zabala fell to 3-0 against Paul, who popped out then, while Nick Duncan hit a home run. Zitzner grounded out to end the inning, which would be all for Zabala.

Lindstrom pitched two innings of scoreless relief after that, while Bill Balaski ostensibly put the game away in the eighth, crashing Tony Rivas with a 3-run homer to right. In the ninth Jose Brito hit another one of those off former Indians starter Arnie Terwilliger, turning the game into a rout for good. Brent Clark pitched the ninth inning. 12-1 Raccoons. Brito 2-5, BB, HR, 4 RBI; Anderson 3-5, 2 2B; Kilgallen 2-3, 2 BB, RBI; Zabala 6.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 7 K, W (1-0) and 2-3, 3 RBI; Lindstrom 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 2 K;

Elation!

Game 3
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Brito – CF Maldonado – LF Fernandez – RF Balaski – C Morales – SS Hunter – 1B Anderson – P Sabre
MIL: 2B Lira – CF Cannizzard – SS Del Vecchio – RF Duncan – C F. Gomez – 3B V. Acosta – 1B Torri – LF J. Nelson – P A. Vargas

Sabre got taken deep by Acosta in the second inning, with Nick Duncan on base to make it a 2-0 deficit. While the Raccoons didn’t get a hit until Berto slapped a single with two outs in the top 3rd and was then left stranded by Brito, the Raccoons cranked up the silly to the max in the bottom of the inning. Nelson reached on a Sabre error to begin the inning, then was on third base with two outs. Del Vecchio, the persistent painbringer, slapped an RBI single to right, 3-0, while Anderson missed Hunter’s throw on Duncan’s grounder for another error that put runners in scoring position. Gomez hit the first pitch he saw into shallow right for a single. Del Vecchio scored, as did Duncan when Balaski’s throw was nowhere near Morales – the THIRD error of the inning. Acosta grounded out, finally, with a roller to short, leaving Sabre down 5-0 and looking like he’d seen a witch.

The Raccoons then battered Vargas for three *earned* runs in the fourth, with Maldo hitting a leadoff single, advancing on a passed ball, and then Manny, Morales, and Anderson each hit liners for RBI hits. Maldonado hit a 2-out triple that led to no run in the fifth, but Hunter doubled home Balaski in the sixth to inch the Critters to within one run of the Loggers, while Sabre held up his part of the box score through the conclusion of the sixth inning. Portland was retired in order in the seventh inning, while the Loggers smashed three hits, two doubles, for two runs off Jermaine Campbell in the bottom of the inning, extending their lead to 7-4, and even though Hunter drove in Balaski *again* in the eighth inning, those two stirring alone was not going to be enough. Anderson hit a 2-out single up the middle and Jeff Kilmer walked the bases full, bringing up Berto with three on and two outs against Kurt Crater, but his sharp grounder was right at Acosta and ended the inning.

With Thursday being off and Angelo Montano already being decided to be skipped on his normal turn, the left-hander instead was put into the bottom 8th, emerging from it without allowing six runs or even just one run. Thus, when the Raccoons started the ninth with Brito and Maldonado singles off Cymbron, they had the tying runs aboard with nobody out. Manny rapped another single up the middle, presenting Balaski with bases loaded… and no outs. Predictably, he made a poor out to Duncan in shallow right. The Raccoons were destined to throw another fat chance away, but Gomez lost Cymbron’s 1-2 pitch to Morales, which scored a run, 7-6, and crucially took the double play away from Tony Morales, who then struck out instead. Hunter popped out on the first pitch he got. 7-6 Loggers. Maldonado 3-5, 3B; Fernandez 2-5, RBI; Balaski 2-4, BB; Hunter 2-5, 2B, 2 RBI; Anderson 2-4, 2B, RBI;

Frustration.

Raccoons (58-58) @ Scorpions (64-49) – August 10-12, 2040

Final stop on the long road trip, with the Scorpions being up on the schedule for the first time since the 2036 season. Back then the Raccoons got swept in the three games in the most-recent winning season the Scorpions had enjoyed. Second in runs scored and fifth in runs allowed, they were leading the FL West – tied with the Wolves – as the series began. Sacramento played the power game, having two hitters (Mike Preble, Carlos Cortes) with 20+ homers already, and more than one homer for the team per game. They were also in the bottom three in defense, but nobody’s clown show featured shoes as big as the Critters’ …

Projected matchups:
Ian Wilson (3-3, 2.08 ERA) vs. Josh Vercher (6-11, 4.64 ERA)
Nelson Moreno (4-5, 3.13 ERA) vs. Jeremy Truett (13-5, 3.59 ERA)
Sal Lozano (1-1, 5.20 ERA) vs. Al Scott (12-3, 2.76 ERA)

Right, right, left – it was Southpaw Sunday again! … Unless the Scorpions also used our common off day to skip Truett. Which was unlikely, but people are people. A skip would move right-hander Lachlan Clarke (9-4, 4.09 ERA) into the series.

Game 1
POR: 2B Brito – 3B Trevino – CF Maldonado – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – SS Hunter – 1B Anderson – P Wilson
SAC: SS Banuelas – 3B Laughren – LF Preble – 1B E. Moreno – RF Cortes – CF Rogers – 2B E. Williams – C Huichapa – P Vercher

Brito opened the set with a double to left, moved to third base on a grounder, and then it got weird. Maldonado was nicked by Vercher, who then attempted to pick him off, but threw the ball over the head of Eddie Moreno. Maldo moved to second, Brito scored, and Manny slapped an RBI single to get up to 2-0 early on. The Raccoons did not put much else together in the early going, but the Scorpions only found one base hit against Wilson, too, the first time through the order. Wilson walked Preble with one out in the fourth, but then got a double play grounder from Moreno. Phil Rogers and Elijah Williams, the latter formerly on the Portlanders, would reach the corners with back-to-back 1-out singles in the fifth, and this time they came through, with Ernesto Huichapa’s sac fly cutting the Raccoons’ lead in half.

It remained 2-1 through six, but Brito reached with one gone in the seventh. He advanced on a grounder by Cosmo, who had been forced to sit out all of the Loggers series with two barking hindpaws, but now was back in action, then singled in by Maldonado’s drop next to the leftfield line. Preble threw to home plate, late, and Maldo reached second base on the throw. Manny hit a fly to deep right, but had it caught on the warning track by Carlos Cortes, ending the inning. The same Cortes opened the bottom of the inning with a single to center, then was doubled up by Rogers, 4-6-3, with the pen already stirring for Portland. But Wilson found his way through the inning despite Williams’ 2-out single, then remained in the game when left-handed batter Rai Higashi opened the eighth in place of Vercher. One pitch later, with Higashi out to Anderson, the Raccoons made the move against righty hitter Jesus Banuelas, bringing in Alex Ramirez, who allowed a single, but then got two more outs to complete eight. Brent Clark put the game away with a 1-2-3 ninth, which as a statement was underselling the magnificent play by Tony Hunter on the middle out, lunging, knocking down, springing up, and zinging the ball to first to nip Cortes. 3-1 Raccoons. Brito 3-5, 2B; Maldonado 2-3, RBI; Wilson 7.1 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 5 K, W (4-3);

And then – no Southpaw Sunday! Al Scott was indeed moved up into the Saturday edition of the Raccoons in the Cali state capital.

Game 2
POR: 2B Brito – 3B Trevino – RF Maldonado – C Kilmer – CF Kilgallen – SS Hunter – 1B Salazar – LF Castro – P N. Moreno
SAC: SS Banuelas – 3B Laughren – RF Cortes – LF Preble – 1B E. Moreno – 2B A: Cedillo – CF Rogers – C Toki – P Scott

Singles by Brito, who breached the .400 mark, and Cosmo, then an error by Banuelas, and the Raccoons had three on and nobody out to start the game. Kilmer struck out, Kilgallen hit a sac fly, and that was all they got, with Hunter also making a poor out to end the inning. The Raccoons continued to strand pairs in the second and third innings as well, at least scoring one run on singles by Castro, Brito (!), and Cosmo in the former for a 2-0 edge for Moreno, who got his ERA under three when he allowed two hits and no runs to the Stingers 3.2 innings into the game.

Kilmer and Hunter reached base with singles in the fifth inning, and then Damian Salazar grounded out to strand both of them, which was the fourth pair left on by the Critters, which had to come back to bite them at some point, and that point was the very same inning. Manichiro Toki hit a 1-out single to center, was bunted over, scored on Banuelas’ single, the shortstop took his 29th bag of the year off a sleepy Kilmer, and then Paul Laughren dropped an RBI single in rightfield to tie the game. That also took care of a 2-something ERA for Moreno for the time being…

He got a new lead though, with Scott suffering a meltdown in the seventh inning. Cosmo hit a leadoff double and Maldonado walked, after which Jeff Kilmer bashed a ball well over the centerfield fence for a go-ahead 3-run homer. With Scott gone, Hunter got on base against Craig Czyszczon – Gesundheit! – stole his way to third base, and was stranded by Salazar and Castro anyway. Nelson Moreno lasted another six outs before ceding the ball to Brent Clark for the ninth (he had thrown 100 pitches). Clark walked Eddie Moreno, allowed a 1-out single to Rogers, and plunked Higashi to fill the bags, then was yanked for Alex Ramirez with Elijah Williams in the box. Both Williams and Banuelas popped out on the infield to end the game. 5-2 Critters. Brito 2-5; Trevino 3-5, 2 2B, RBI; Kilmer 2-5, HR, 3 RBI; Moreno 8.0 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 0 BB, 4 K, W (5-5); Ramirez 0.2 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 0 K, SV (2);

Back to .500 for Nels!

Game 3
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – CF Maldonado – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – SS Hunter – 1B Anderson – P Lozano
SAC: SS Banuelas – 3B Laughren – LF Preble – 1B E. Moreno – RF Cortes – CF Rogers – 2B A. Cedillo – C Huichapa – P Truett

The Raccoons had both Berto and Cosmo caught stealing in the first inning, then produced an unearned run for Sacramento through a Balaski error in the bottom half of what quickly became a second-rate sitcom on Sunday. At least Lozano resisted the urge to implode entirely at the beginning, and then Balaski even made himself useful at the plate, driving in the go-ahead run in the fourth inning, the fourth straight Critter to land a base hit to start the frame; Maldonado had homered the game tied off Truett, and then the 4-5-6 just kept dishing out singles. Balaski’s made it 2-1, after which Tony Hunter walked, filling the bags with no outs, dooming the entire operation. Anderson singled home a run, 3-1, but Lozano lined out to Alfonso Cedillo, with Hunter being picked off second base on the play. Berto then grounded out. Again, just ONE run from three on, no outs. How did they DO that???

The Scorpions put runners on the corners in the bottom 4th, then left them there. Lozano got another five outs in neat fashion before Cortes hit a 2-out single in the bottom 6th. Lozano nicked Rogers, and maybe we should have seen the writing on the wall, but it didn’t become entirely apparent until after Cedillo whacked a score-flipping 3-piece to right. That was 4-3 for the home team, Lozano would not be back for the seventh, and while Maldo hit a 2-out triple to center in the seventh inning, Manny struck out to strand him. Sacramento tacked on an unearned run in the bottom 7th against Campbell, with Banuelas hitting a single, taking his 30th base, reaching third base when Morales’ throw went through Hunter, and then was chased on Laughren’s sac fly. The Raccoons had the tying runs on board in the eighth; Hunter drew a walk from Tony Fuentes, while Salazar hit for Anderson against lefty Justin Kaiser and reached base on yet another error. Brito then struck out pinch-hitting against Czyszczon, leaving everybody stranded. Garavito then got torn up for three runs in the bottom 8th without knowing what the **** was happening to put the game away…

…or was it? Top 9th, Lazaro Cavazos pitching. Leadoff single for Berto. Another single for Cosmo. Maldo reached, too. Three on, no outs, which prompted the Scorpions to go to John Landrum. That was excusable – they were an FL team and could not know every single curse lingering over the Critters. Manny popped out. I groaned loud enough to be asked by bystanders whether I was alright. Then Landrum walked in a run against Morales. Balaski slapped a 2-run single. Suddenly the tying run was on base. And just as suddenly it was all over, when Tony Hunter hit a grounder to second base, to the shortstop, to first – ballgame. 8-6 Scorpions. Trevino 2-4, BB; Maldonado 3-4, HR, 3B, RBI; Balaski 3-5, 3 RBI;

In other news

August 8 – It’s 2,000 career hits now for VAN 2B Dan Schneller (.328, 8 HR, 23 RBI) with two more coming in a 5-0 loss to the Indians on Wednesday. Schneller singles of IND SP Jake Jackson (7-12, 4.36 ERA) for the milestone. A career .288/.386/.427 batter with 196 homers and 792 runs batted in, Schneller was the 2029 Rookie of the Year and 2037 Player of the Year on those same Indians. He was in San Francisco for two-and-a-half seasons before being traded to the Canadiens in July.
August 10 – TIJ SP Bill Quintero (7-9, 4.01 ERA) 3-hits the Buffaloes in a 4-0 shutout.
August 10 – SFW 2B/SS Mario Colon (.227, 12 HR, 51 RBI) objects to his team blowing a 4-3 lead to the Crusaders with four runs conceded in the top of the ninth by hitting a walkoff grand slam in the bottom of the ninth for an 8-7 Warriors win.
August 12 – The only score in the Gold Sox’ 1-0 win over the Loggers is a home run by SS Ryan Johnston (.258, 6 HR, 35 RBI).
August 12 – NYC SP Jamal Barrow (3-12, 4.62 ERA) needs to have bone chips removed from his elbow and will miss the rest of the season.

FL Player of the Week: SAL 1B/LF/RF Jose Rivera (.326, 21 HR, 84 RBI), hitting .476 (10-21) with 3 HR, 5 RBI
CL Player of the Week: ATL SP Brad Santry (16-6, 2.93 ERA), pitching 16.2 innings for a 2-0 record, 0.00 ERA, and 18 K

Complaints and stuff

Ho-hum week after all. Nobody quite knows what Jose Brito is putting into his foodbowl in the mornings, but it looks green and leafy and none of the other Critters will touch it. Nelson Moreno pitched rather fine again. I like how he walks fewer people than in AAA. Of course the strikeouts are very low, but he’s only 21. Most pitchers are not nasty yet at 21.

Apart from him though, the season can’t end soon enough. The Caps and damn Elks are up next week.

Bernie Chavez was sent to AAA this week for a rehab assignment. We’re looking for two starts to get him warmed up, so he should be back late next week / early the week after that. Also back in AAA was Steve Nickas, who cleared waivers for the 87th time in his career. He then quickly strained an oblique and went to the minor league DL.

Fun Fact: Since 2007, the Raccoons-Capitals series has always seen one team take at least three series in a row before the other team took over for just as long.

It’s true; we haven’t played them as often as some other teams, but it’s always been three or four sets in a row before the honors went to the other team.

The Raccoons won the last three sets…

[Westheim]

Raccoons (60-59) vs. Capitals (59-59) – August 13-15, 2040

The Caps were tenth in runs scored, but fourth in runs allowed in the Federal League. The overall package clearly didn’t work, with their .500 record trying its best to mask their -39 run differential (Critters: 0). They had a number of injuries to their already wonky lineup, with Rich Falzone, Brian Schneider, and Nate Evans all on the DL. As hinted at last week, the Critters had won the last three meetings with the Caps, including two out of three games in the most recent series played in 2038.

Projected matchups:
Raffaello Sabre (10-7, 3.11 ERA) vs. Bryce Sparkes (13-9, 3.51 ERA)
Angelo Montano (3-7, 6.52 ERA) vs. Josh Long (9-8, 3.76 ERA)
Ian Wilson (4-3, 1.98 ERA) vs. Jose Alaniz (9-9, 3.81 ERA)

It wasn’t often that we’d play a team with not one, but two former Critters lined up in their rotation. Both Sparkes and Alaniz (who was the only lefty opposition in the set) received a warm welcome-back applause from the thin home crowd. Same for Dave Myers. Nobody remembered much of Dusty Kulp, Dennis Citriniti, or Vince Lutch, while Adam Avakian mostly drew hisses. Me included.

Game 1
WAS: CF T. Romero – RF Ed Thompson – 2B Arnold – LF Weinstein – 1B Avakian – 3B D. Myers – C Petroni – SS Lutch – P Sparkes
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – CF Maldonado – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – SS Hunter – 1B Salazar – P Sabre

The Coons loaded the bases on three incredibly soft singles to begin the bottom of the first inning, but all they got was a Fernandez sac fly before Kilmer whiffed and Balaski flew out to Tony Romero. Damian Salazar made it 2-0 in the bottom 2nd with his first career home run, a shot to left in his 75th career at-bat, which was not the ratio that would get you loved around here. Just ask Avakian. (hiss!)

Giampaolo Petroni opened the third inning with a single to right-center after Sabre had retired the first six in a row. Lutch struck out, except that his bat grazed Kilmer’s mitten and he was sent to first base for catcher’s interference. That extra base gave the Caps a run on Ed Thompson’s 2-out single to center before Logan Arnold grounded out to short to strand two. Kilmer’s game didn’t get better after that, either, as he didn’t last past the third inning, being ejected for going ballistic after being called out on strikes to end the bottom 3rd with Manny in scoring position after a hit and a stolen base. Tony Morales replaced him for obvious reasons. The change of catchers out of the blue didn’t do Sabre any good, with the Caps ripping three singles (with a double play) off him to tie the game in the fourth before Vince Lutch hit a 2-out, 2-run homer to left to give them a 4-2 lead.

That wasn’t the end though; the Raccoons came back in the bottom 5th with Sparkes walking Cosmo and allowing a single to Maldonado. Manny Fernandez ripped a baseball to deep right for a 3-run homer, giving Portland a 5-4 lead, but another single by Lutch and Tony Romero’s RBI double in the seventh ended up leaving both Sabre and Sparkes with a no-decision in a game deadlocked at five. The Caps then loaded the bases on Chuck Jones in dismal fashion in the eighth – and with no body out – with a leadoff single by Avakian (hiss!), who was hitting .268 with five homers at that point, and then two batters reaching because Jones tried to nip the lead runner and couldn’t get him either time on comebackers. Yanked with a real mess on the basepaths, Jones saw Lindstrom surrender the go-ahead run on a Lutch sac fly, but then retired Aaron Botzet and Tony Romero to get out of the inning. The Critters couldn’t get through a cavalcade of relievers in the bottom 8th that included Kulp and Citriniti, but then had Jose Brito and Alberto Ramos draw leadoff walks off Jesse Allison in the bottom 9th, putting the tying and go-ahead runs on base. Cosmo popped out. Maldo flew out to right. And Fernandez also flew to deep right, but also into an out at the fence. 6-5 Capitals. Maldonado 3-5; Balaski 2-4;

Game 2
WAS: CF T. Romero – 1B Avakian – 2B Arnold – C Came – LF Weinstein – 3B D. Myers – RF B. Rios – SS Lutch – P J. Long
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Brito – CF Maldonado – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – SS Hunter – 1B Anderson – P Montano

The story of Tuesday’s game was a rather foreseeable one; Josh Long was good, and Montano was anything but. At least he lasted a while, despite getting whacked around from the start, with Chris Came hitting a 2-run single as early as the first inning. Lutch hit a solo homer in the second, and the Caps tacked on another run in the fifth, while Josh Long scattered four hits and would be working on a shutout through five innings if it hadn’t been for an error by Vince Lutch giving the Raccoons an extra out in the fourth, which put Morales on base with one out. The Raccoons scored him with a pair of 2-out singles by Hunter and Anderson, but after five trailed 4-1 and felt like they trailed by more. While the Caps were done scoring on Montano, who lasted six and two thirds and thus longer than ever anticipated, the Raccoons didn’t land another base hit until Berto singled with one out in the bottom 7th, and then Brito was right there for a 6-4-3 double play to get rid of him. Maldo had leadoff single in the eighth that went absolutely nowhere, while *Citriniti* retired the Raccoons in order in the ninth inning. 4-1 Capitals.

That was a just a terrible game, top to bottom. The only good thing about it was that it lasted well short of three hours and they didn’t make me look at their misery for longer than absolutely necessary…

Game 3
WAS: CF T. Romero – LF Ed Thompson – RF S. Martin – 2B Arnold – 3B Falzone – C Came – 1B Avakian – SS D. Myers – P Alaniz
POR: 2B Brito – 3B Trevino – CF Maldonado – C Kilmer – LF Fernandez – SS Kilgallen – 1B Salazar – RF Castro – P Wilson

Portland scored first, with Brito and Cosmo reaching the corners right away in the first inning. Maldo’s sac fly started and concluded the scoring effort in the inning, though, with Kilmer and Fernandez retired on poor outs. After an uneventful second inning it was Ian Wilson – who was not allowing a base hit through three – to open the bottom 3rd with a double to left. He scored on Trevino’s single, 2-0, and while Maldo forced out Cosmo with a grounder, he reached third base on Kilmer’s single after that. Manny hit a 1-2 pitch to deep center, but couldn’t beat Tony Romero’s reach, and the catch stranded the runners.

Washington remained hitless until the fifth, which Chris Came opened with a homer to center, which sure took care of that concern. The following inning, Romero’s leadoff double and an RBI single to right by Scott Martin tied the game at two. Maldonado *robbed* Logan Arnold in deep center after that, keeping the game at least tied for the time being. The stamina-deficient Wilson made it through seven innings, barely, maintaining the 2-2 tie and ended up with no decision when all the Raccoons did in the bottom 7th with was Anderson legging out an infield single with two outs in Wilson’s spot, only for Brito to ground out easily. Alex Ramirez maintained the tie in the eighth, but Brent Clark was clipped for singles by the just-activated Rich Falzone and Came, then a walk to Avakian and a Myers sac fly for the go-ahead run in the top 9th. Not all was lost yet, with Kilgallen ripping a 1-out triple off Allison in the bottom of the inning. Tony Morales batted for Salazar and hit a sac fly to right, staving off defeat for now, and Castro’s fly out to center sent the game to extra innings. The 10th inning saw Brent Clark retire nobody, conceding two hits and two walks before the Caps continued to ravage Chuck Jones for another bushel of hits. They scored six runs in an abortive, half-arsed attempt by the Raccoons not to get swept. The Raccoons went out in order in the bottom of the inning. 9-3 Capitals. Trevino 2-4, RBI; Anderson (PH) 1-1; Wilson 7.0 IP, 3 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 4 K and 1-2, 2B;

(sigh!)

Bright sides. Only 40 games left, and we were now also emotionally well prepared to face the damn Elks.

The three games on the weekend mattered so little, I didn’t even seek out the additional, if reluctant, emotional support of any of my dear co-workers. After the sixpack in the 10th on Wednesday I just got up, grabbed Honeypaws, and went home without saying a word, slamming the door so hard, part of the bobblehead case collapsed once again.

Raccoons (60-62) @ Canadiens (77-43) – August 17-19, 2040

The damn Elks led the division by about ten games, they were totally gonna make the playoffs, and they were 11-1 over the stupid Coons, none of which mattered too greatly anymore. First in runs scored, first in runs allowed, first in this and that, yada-yada, I don’t … just bring it. (hugs Honeypaws a little tighter)

Projected matchups:
Nelson Moreno (5-5, 3.05 ERA) vs. Matt Sealock (16-3, 2.49 ERA)
Sal Lozano (1-2, 5.08 ERA) vs. Paul Medvec (2-1, 2.95 ERA)
Raffaello Sabre (10-7, 3.27 ERA) vs. Eric Weitz (10-6, 3.26 ERA)

All right-handers, including the rookie Medvec, who was the #75 prospect in the league.

Game 1
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Brito – CF Maldonado – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – SS Hunter – 1B Salazar – P Moreno
VAN: LF Foss – C Clemente – CF Outram – 2B Schneller – 3B Sprague – 1B J. Lopez – RF DeVita – SS Cabral – P Sealock

Nels was beleaguered from the start, with the damn Elks allowing both a walk and a hit in each of the first two innings, including a Dan Schneller single that extended a 15-game hitting streak, but didn’t allow a run and got his ERA under three again with three scoreless to begin the game. The Critters went zip-for-everything the first time through against Sealock, but then Berto slapped a leadoff single through the left side in the fourth. Brito was on spot again, hitting into a double play, and Sealock continued to face the minimum through four. Balaski and Hunter hit back-to-back 2-out singles in the fifth inning then, but Balaski was thrown out trying to go to third base against the arm of Marc DeVita. Moreno kept grinding away on the mighty Elks lineup, getting through five shutout innings, but the actual line was definitely not pretty: four hits, four walks, and only one strikeout (against Jerry Outram!), and 94 pitches in five frames. He got a groundout from Glenn Sprague to begin the bottom 6th, then allowed singles to Johnny Lopez and DeVita and was replaced with Jones, who got a double play grounder from Ramon Cabral to end the sixth inning and prevented Moreno from going on the hook. We’d chalk that one up as a moral victory for him!

In the real world, the dumb Coons scored as soon as Moreno was out of the game. Brito opened with a double to center in the seventh, then scored on Maldo’s double to right, 1-0. Manny walked, Morales singled, and there were three on with nobody out, which made me announce impending doom to Honeypaws. K, pop, K went the Coons, stranding three runners on base. Chuck Jones blew the lead with back-to-back singles hit by Aaron Foss and Timóteo Clemente, plus Outram’s sac fly, in the bottom 7th. Dan Schneller then hit a double off Ramirez, but Clemente was too slow to score on such a play, and both were stranded when Sprague struck out. Ramirez then put Lopez and DeVita on base to begin the bottom 8th, and this time there was no recovery with Garavito and Zabala continuing to fudge up behind him and concede both runners before somehow Schneller lined out to strand three runners on base. Tony Morales hit a jack off Tim Zimmerman in the ninth that narrowed the gap to one run, but it also came with two outs. Balaski grounded out to Schneller to end the game. 3-2 Canadiens. Morales 2-4, HR, RBI; Moreno 5.1 IP, 6 H, 0 R, 4 BB, 1 K;

(flicks off TV and turns to Honeypaws) That could have gone way, way worse…!

(inadvertently looks skywards to check whether the baseball gods are angered already)

Game 2
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – CF Maldonado – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – SS Hunter – 1B Anderson – P Lozano
VAN: RF R. Phillips – C Clemente – CF Outram – 2B Schneller – 1B J. Lopez – 3B Sprague – LF DeVita – SS Sibley – P Medvec

The middle game was again scoreless early on and Lozano was about as solid as Moreno the night before, allowing five runners in the first three innings, although double plays and bad baserunning kept the damn Elks short. Medvec also hit a single off him in the third inning, then shuffled the bases full in the fourth for Portland. He nicked Maldo to begin the inning, then added Kilmer and Balaski with 1-out walks to fill the bases *and* there was not *nobody* out, so we could maybe actually ******* score here! Tony Hunter slapped a grounder to right which Schneller knocked down, but couldn’t play for an out, giving the Raccoons the lead with the infield single. Anderson and Lozano then both struck out to strand three anyway, and then Jerry Outram rammed one out at the next opportunity anyway.

The bases were loaded with one out *again* in the fifth. Kilmer popped out, making me sigh, but Bill Balaski clubbed a single up the rightfield line. Phillips cut it off quickly, but two runs scored for a 3-1 lead. Hunter grounded out to strand two more then. Lozano blew the lead right away, again; Ross Sibley and Ryan Phillips reached base, and Timóteo Clemente doubled them in with a clonker off the fence in leftfield. Outram also nearly hit a homer, but was actually caught, and Schneller popped out to strand Clemente at third base in the 3-3 game.

Top 7th, Cosmo hit a leadoff double, which knocked out Medvec. Jordan Calderon walked Maldonado, who was forced out on a Fernandez grounder to Schneller. Runners on the corners, Kilmer slapped a single through the left side to take a 4-3 lead, and then Balaski killed it with a grounder to short that went 6-4-3 and kept it 4-3. The Raccoons actually held up for at least one inning this time, with Lozano getting out Sibley to begin the seventh before being replaced by Campbell for two more outs. Top 8th, Jose Brito batted for Anderson against the left-handed Calderon and hit a solo jack, 5-3. Then came the bottom 8th, where Zabala came on and walked Clemente, walked Outram, and walked Schneller without retiring anybody. Three on, no outs went to Lindstrom, who struck out Lopez, struck out Cabral, and then got DeVita to fly out to center in a full count. (blinks bewilderedly) The Coons did not tack on in the ninth, and when Brent Clark came out for the bottom 9th, he started with a 4-pitch walk to Sibley, who reached third base on a balk and a grounder. Phillips flew out poorly for the second out, but Clark also walked Clemente, who was the tying run and replaced with pinch-runner Alex Perez. Outram was the winning run and a lefty batter, so Clark remained in there – if he wanted to be *anything* in the majors as a lefty reliever, even if not a closer, he had to get rid of Outram, or at least not give up two runs (or three)…! Clark threw a wild pitch to score a run, then walked Outram on five pitches. Then Clark was yanked and also no longer the makeshift closer. Alex Ramirez came in for Schneller, walked ******* Schneller, too, and the bags were full for Johnny Lopez, who poked the first pitch into a groundout to Brito at second base. 5-4 Coons. Trevino 2-4, BB, 2B; Maldonado 1-2, BB; Kilmer 2-4, BB, RBI; Brito (PH) 1-1, HR, RBI;

Game 3
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – CF Maldonado – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – 1B Salazar – SS Kilgallen – P Sabre
VAN: LF Foss – 1B J. Lopez – CF Outram – 2B Schneller – RF R. Phillips – 3B Sprague – C D. James – SS Cabral – P Weitz

The only offensive rage of the early innings was Dan Schneller’s leadoff triple in the second inning and how Balaski threw him out at home plate on Phillips’ fly to right. Again, nobody scored through three, with both teams littering two hits for no actual gains. Morales hit a single in the fourth, but was doubled up by Balaski, and the first run didn’t appear on the board until the fifth, and then for the wrong team; Sprague and Derek James hit back-to-back 1-out singles off Sabre in the bottom 5th, Sprague stole third base, then scored on Cabral’s sac fly to left. Weitz struck out to strand James.

Portland answered, though; after five innings of futility, Cosmo opened the sixth with a double, Maldo walked, and Manny raked a 3-run homer to right, all with nobody out. Sabre then allowed a leadoff single to Aaron Foss in the bottom of the inning, but the damn Elks grounded into a force at second base twice and ultimately never got past first base, then made three outs in quick fashion in the seventh, which was as deep as Sabre would go, spending 106 pitches for five hits and the one run. Yet, even with the 3-1 lead handed over to the pen, I was filled with calmness, which was probably what half a bottle of Capt’n Coma with a splash of drain pipe cleaner did for most people. Chuck Jones gave up a run on Sibley and Foss doubles in the eighth, but at least retired Outram with two outs and the tying run in scoring position… Top 9th against Zimmerman, the Raccoons cobbled together singles by Salazar, Anderson, and Berto for a 2-out run, and Oliver Anderson was sent from second base when Cosmo dropped a soft line into left-center for a single. Foss’ throw was late, the Coons got another run, and the trailing runners reached scoring position, too. Maldonado then lined out to Foss, ending the inning and giving the ball to Campbell for the bottom 9th, because if we inevitably have to **** up, why not get the best ****-upper that we have? Schneller walked, but Phillips hit a grounder to Brito at second for a 4-6-3 double play. Sprague singled to center. James singled to right. Cabral was the tying run with two outs, fell to two strikes, then hit a jack to right.

(heavy breathing)

(pours more drain cleanse into his Capt’n Coma)

DeVita hit another single in the #9 hole before a groundout sent the game to extras. It didn’t stay in extras for long. The Raccoons stranded Tony Morales on third base in the top of the 10th, while Garavito was left to his own deviced in the bottom 10th, which opened with a Lopez double to right. Outram legged out an infield single, and Schneller ended the charade with a sac fly to left. 6-5 Canadiens. Ramos 2-5, RBI; Trevino 2-4, BB, RBI; Salazar 2-5; Kilgallen 1-2, BB; Anderson (PH) 1-1; Sabre 7.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 1 K;

In other news

August 15 – DEN OF/1B Rich de Luna (.318, 4 HR, 52 RBI) has extended his hitting streak to 25 games with a single in a 3-1 loss to the Condors. Game #25 comes 15 days after #24 for de Luna, who had to sit out two weeks with a mild forearm strain.
August 17 – The hitting streak of DEN OF/1B Rich de Luna (.314, 4 HR, 52 RBI) ends after 26 games with an 0-for-4 in a 2-0 loss to the Wolves.
August 18 – WAS C Chris Came (.257, 3 HR, 27 RBI) hits a walkoff grand slam to beat the Blue Sox’ Alex Banderas (6-3, 2.30 ERA, 23 SV) in a 14-11 shootout. Came drives in six runs total on four hits, while Washington’s Scott Martin (.276, 3 HR, 20 RBI) drives in two runs on five singles.
August 19 – TIJ CL Steve Bailey (2-6, 3.33 ERA, 31 SV) will miss the rest of the season with shoulder inflammation.
August 19 – The Condors have only three hits in their 1-0 win over the Knights, but one of them is the winning home run by INF Bob Nelson (.236, 8 HR, 31 RBI).

FL Player of the Week: NAS LF/RF/1B Sean Ashley (.293, 25 HR, 71 RBI), hitting .500 (12-24) with 5 HR, 6 RBI
CL Player of the Week: ATL 1B Jose Garcia (.289, 5 HR, 56 RBI), batting .517 (15-29) with 7 RBI

Complaints and stuff

I wonder whether Raffaello Sabre also regularly looks up to the baseball gods, extends his paws, and screams “WHY ME???”

If so, it’s fine, because if he’s worth any compensation pick (and he damn well should be), he can be on a good team next year. One that actually deserves him.

While Saturday was awful, we at least have won TWO games from the damn Elks now, and won’t set a new record for futility against a CL North opponent. As I said, that was also the end of Brent Clark as a closer; we’d go with closing by committee the rest of the year and try to figure something out after the season. That doesn’t mean that Clark won’t get into the ninth inning with a lead – but we’ll try a mixed approach now.

We have Monday off and will be in New York after that. Bernie Chavez did another rehab start in AAA on Thursday and will be lineup to start the opener against the Crusaders, which will indeed happen. Angelo Montano will be sent to the Alley Cats to make room, but we’ll bring him back up on September 1.

Fun Fact: After seven years of having the upper paw in the all-time head-to-head comparison, the Raccoons are now a losing team again facing the damn Elks.

574 wins, 575 losses.

Thanks, Jermaine. ******* *******. ********. Go lick a buzzsaw.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (61-64) @ Crusaders (58-65) – August 21-23, 2040

More games nobody would care about. The Raccoons trailed in the season series, 7-5, against the team second from the bottom in runs scored and sixth in runs allowed. Their run differential was -45. While sucking in most offensive categories, they were second in stolen bases ahead of the third-place Coons.

Projected matchups:
Bernie Chavez (2-9, 5.46 ERA) vs. Todd Lush (10-7, 3.74 ERA)
Ian Wilson (2-1, 2.49 ERA) vs. Gabriel Lara (3-6, 7.85 ERA)
Nelson Moreno (5-5, 2.87 ERA) vs. Aaron Hickey (3-7, 4.36 ERA)

Injuries had ransacked their pitching staff and they were piecing it together somehow. Lush was a southpaw to start the series, but we might also see southpaw Bill Herrmann (1-0, 6.52 ERA) make a spot start. With Josh Brown, Dave Hils, and Jamal Barrow they had three starters on the DL. Outfielders Rich Salek and Chris Russell were also out.

Bernie Chavez would make his first appearances coming back from rehab.

Game 1
POR: 2B Brito – 3B Trevino – CF Maldonado – C Kilmer – LF Fernandez – SS Hunter – 1B Salazar – RF Castro – P Chavez
NYC: SS Adame – LF J. Garcia – 2B Briones – CF Besaw – 3B Sifuentes – RF Platero – C D. Phillips – 1B Rudd – P Lush

Both teams had two hits in the first three innings, but only the New York hit a jack, Ramon Sifuentes hitting a solo home run to right for a 1-0 lead for the Crusaders. Portland had singles by Kilmer and Hunter in the fourth inning. They also brought up the minimum, with Manny hitting into a double play and Hunter being caught stealing. The game remained a low-key pitching duel. Both teams scattered three hits in the middle innings without going anywhere. Bernie Chavez struck out only two batters through six innings, while Lush rung up four, hence low-key; poor contact was the order of the day.

Top 7th, Hunter reached on an error by Alex Adame – the youngest player in the league right now and the only one 18 years old – with one out, after which Damian Salazar hit a double over Joe Besaw to put the tying and go-ahead runs in scoring position for the .190 hitter Alex Castro, who promptly struck out, but then Bernie Chavez zinged a 2-out single to center to flip the damn score in his own favor, 2-1! Brito singled, but Cosmo grounded out to end the inning, and the eighth began with a Maldonado double to right. Kilmer was walked intentionally, while Lush got poor outs from the next three batters without Maldonado making it as far as third base… Bernie Chavez allowed a leadoff single to Devin Phillips in the bottom of the inning, but remained in there. He was only on 70-odd pitches, and we could just as well have him blow his own lead to bits instead of turning it over to our hunchbacked bullpen. Phillips advanced on two groundouts before Adame singled him in with a zinger through the left side, tying the score at two. Ricardo Salmeron, an injury replacement for Juan Garcia, then grounded out. Facing ex-Coon John Hennessy in the ninth, Castro then ripped a leadoff double to left, which was surprising, and now Bernie was hit for. Kilgallen was the only right-hander on the bench and was then walked intentionally, but Brito slapped an RBI single to left off Hennessy anyway, taking the 3-2 lead. Cosmo struck out, but Maldonado hit an RBI single, Kilmer walked, and Manny singled home a pair before Hennessy was yanked for righty Luis Villagomez, who allowed another single to Hunter to load the bases again. Balaski batted for Salazar and hit an RBI single, but Castro struck out and Kilgallen grounded out to end the 5-run onslaught. David Lindstrom then actually made the lead stand up in the bottom of the ninth… 7-2 Critters. Brito 2-5, RBI; Maldonado 3-5, 2 2B, RBI; Fernandez 2-5, 2 RBI; Hunter 2-4, BB; Balaski (PH) 1-1, RBI; Chavez 8.0 IP, 7 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 0 BB, 2 K, W (3-9) and 1-3, 2 RBI;

Game 2
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – CF Maldonado – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – SS Hunter – 1B Anderson – P Wilson
NYC: SS Adame – LF L. Herrera – 2B Briones – 3B Sifuentes – CF Besaw – RF Platero – C D. Phillips – 1B Rudd – P G. Lara

Lara conceded a triple to Cosmo and plated him with a wild pitch for a quick 1-0 lead in the first inning, but the grin was wiped off our striped faces quickly, with Maldonado hurting his wrist on a sprawling catch to strand a pair of Wilson-owned runners in the bottom of the first inning. He was replaced with Alex Castro. Meanwhile the bottom of the order stirred Lara for a bushel of singles (Morales, Hunter, Anderson) in the top 2nd, bringing up Wilson unfortunately with three on and one out. Ian Wilson struck out, Berto grounded out to second, and nobody scored. Cosmo opened the third with a single, was doubled up by Castro, Manny singled, stole second, and scored on Tony Morales’ single. The inning ended with Balaski, and New York got a run back with Adame and Lorenzo Herrera singles, plus a wild pitch, in the bottom 3rd, making it a 2-1 game before *another* wild pitch plated Jose Platero in the bottom of the fourth. Wilson and Morales were clearly not on the same page here; Platero had singled, while Tom Rudd had drawn a 1-out walk in the inning.

More erratic pitching including two walks to Sifuentes and Besaw in the fifth ended Wilson’s outing after that inning and 82 mostly confused pitches. He did get in line for a W with Tony Morales’ leadoff jack to right in the sixth, and was hit for with Hunter and Anderson on the corners. Brito hit a sac fly, Anderson stole a base (!), but while Berto reached, Cosmo grounded out to strand the pair of them in a 4-2 game. Garavito and Zabala nursed that for a while before ******** Campbell inevitably blew it in the eighth. He shuffled the bags full, then gave up a 2-run single to PH Greg Ortiz in Herrera’s spot. Ramirez replaced Campbell and got two groundouts to escape the inning, now with the score tied at four. Hennessy was back at it in the ninth, in which Castro reached with one out on a Sifuentes error before Manny legged out an infield single. Morales and Balaski both flew out to left to strand the runners. Ramirez got two outs in the bottom 9th before Phillips and Rudd went to the corners with singles. Salmeron walked, filling them up for Jim Adams, who hit a grounder up the middle that eluded Hunter, eluded Trevino, and ended the game. 5-4 Crusaders. Fernandez 3-5; Morales 3-5, HR, 2 RBI; Hunter 2-3, BB; Anderson 2-4;

There were about 15 reasons why the 2040 Raccoons were sucking the cover off the baseballs in that one game alone. Maybe even 16.

Also sucking: Jesus Maldonado went on the DL with the sprained wrist, expected to miss at least three weeks, which was like most of the season left – we were only 35 games from the merciful release of death – I mean, Closing Day now.

Ed Hooge was not ready to be activated yet (probably on the weekend), so the Raccoons had to pick through the chafed remains in AAA once again. We produced 23-year-old Aruban switch-hitter Jay de Wit. The Oranjestader didn’t really have a good position, dabbling with second base, third base, and leftfield. He was hitting .294/.325/.448 with six homers in semi-regular duty in AAA. He had cost all of $16k in the 2033 July IFA period.

Game 3
POR: 2B Brito – 3B Trevino – CF Fernandez – C Kilmer – SS Hunter – 1B Salazar – LF de Wit – RF Castro – P Moreno
NYC: SS Adame – 1B Rudd – 2B Briones – CF Besaw – 3B Sifuentes – RF Platero – C J. Herrera – LF L. Herrera – P Herrmann

The Crusaders would hit an incessant amount of grounders through the creases on the infield, including by Adame and Rudd to begin the first. The runners pulled off a double steal and both scored on a single by Joe Besaw, although Tony Hunter would claw the Coons back into a 2-2 tie in the second inning, homering to left-center after a leadoff walk to Jeff Kilmer. That was all the scoring through five, with Nelson Moreno not having one of his best starts, conceding five hits and issuing three walks on top of that. The Raccoons had only one hit other than the Hunter bomb, a single by Alex Castro, against Herrmann until Cosmo opened the sixth with a single to left. Fernandez flew out, but Kilmer singled and Hunter walked, filling the bases for … well… whatever you wanted to call the array from the #6 slot on down. Salazar hit a sac fly at least for a 3-2 lead, but Jay de Wit grounded out to short.

Moreno scattered another three hits for four outs before being lifted after Lorenzo Herrera’s sharp single with one out in the seventh. Brent Clark came on to face PH Jesse Stedham, gave up a homer to dead center, and I wished myself into the offseason even harder than before. Top 8th, Manny Vasquez walked Kilmer and Hunter with one out. The Raccoons brought out Anderson to hit for Salazar to counter the right-hander, and the Crusaders went to the pen and brought Orlando Altreche… a different right-hander. A grounder by Anderson and a soft fly by de Wit ended the inning surely enough, though. Casey McQueen retired Castro, Kilgallen, and Brito in order then in the ninth. 4-3 Crusaders. Kilmer 1-1, 3 BB; Hunter 1-2, 2 BB, HR, 2 RBI;

Raccoons (62-66) vs. Falcons (65-62) – August 24-26, 2040

The Falcons were still telling themselves that at 8 1/2 games out they had a chance to make the playoffs in the South. Well, they had to get winning *now* for that. The season series was even at three, and they looked rather nondescript with their fifth place in runs scored and seventh place in runs allowed and +11 run differential (Coons: -8).

Projected matchups:
Raffaello Sabre (10-7, 3.19 ERA) vs. Jose de Lucio (8-4, 4.40 ERA)
Sal Lozano (2-2, 4.95 ERA) vs. Rafael Pedraza (9-13, 4.06 ERA)
Bernie Chavez (3-9, 5.21 ERA) vs. Jose Lerma (2-0, 2.67 ERA)

Lerma was the only left-hander on offer. The 41-year-old was just coming back from shoulder inflammation, which had cost him almost four months on the shelf. Being the feature on Southpaw Sunday would be his second start back from rehab.

Game 1
CHA: 3B Farfan – 1B Lorensen – SS Aparicio – C M. Cook – RF C. Robinson – CF J. Reyna – LF Salto – 2B A. Rojas – P de Lucio
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – CF Kilgallen – SS Hunter – 1B Anderson – P Sabre

Portland got going fast; Berto opened the first inning with a single, stole second, moved to third on Cosmo’s single, Cosmo also stole second, and then Manny Fernandez barged a 3-run homer anyway! Next thing we saw was Cosmo getting hurt on an abortive double play attempt in the second inning and requiring replacement by Brito. Word came fast from Dr. Padilla that he had strained a rib cage muscle and was headed for the DL. Great! More agony! – No, Maud, your fennel tea won’t make it better. – Just tell me where the detergents are.

Sabre made it through four innings without giving up a run despite giving the Falcons a runner in every inning and – as usual – not overpowering anybody with his stuff. In the fifth it was a Jose Farfan single and Tony Aparicio’s double that got them a run with two outs, with Mitch Cook flying out after that to strand Aparicio in scoring position. Chris Robinson and Jonathan Reyna opened the sixth with a pair of singles and set up camp on the corners only to be cleaned up by Graciano Salto’s double play grounder. Robinson scored, while Reyna was out at second. Alfredo Rojas popped out to end the inning, now in a 3-2 game, although a Tony Morales home run in the bottom of the inning extended the lead to 4-2 again.

Sabre was hit for by Castro in the bottom 7th to no great effect, but then the Raccoons reeled off singles against de Lucio and Mike Simcoe. Berto and Brito went to the corners, and Manny’s RBI single made it 5-2. Morales grounded out, ending the string and the inning. Ramirez and Garavito pieced together the eighth inning to begin the worst part of every game – the one where our pen got involved. It was still 5-2 to begin the ninth, with Jermaine Campbell being the designated glonk of the day to get three outs before blowing a 3-run lead. Reyna opened with a single to center. Salto doubled to left. He walked Rojas. When switch-hitter Ruben Esperanza came out with three on and nobody out, the Raccoons moved on to Chuck Jones instead. Jones rung up Esperanza in a full count, then gave up a run on Farfan’s groundout. Ryan Lorensen looked at strike three in another full count to stave off another complete collapse. 5-3 Raccoons. Ramos 2-3, BB; Trevino 1-1; Fernandez 2-4, HR, 4 RBI; Morales 2-4, HR, RBI; Balaski 2-4; Sabre 7.0 IP, 8 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 1 BB, 4 K, W (11-7);

First Portland save for Chuck Jones, and the third of his career in 173 games. He saved two games with the Scorpions in ’38.

Cosmo meanwhile was off to the DL. The Raccoons dug some deeper into the AAA roster, which already had that team tanking like no tomorrow. Up came 24-year-old 2035 third-rounder 2B Nick Lando, who was barely hitting anything in AAA as it was. He was meager on defense, meager at the plate, but a good runner.

At the same time, Ed Hooge was activated from the DL and Alex Castro (.188, 0 HR, 1 RBI) was returned to the Alley Cats.

Game 2
CHA: 2B Farfan – 1B LeClerc – SS Aparicio – C M. Cook – LF Esperanza – RF Salto – 3B A. Rojas – CF J. Reyna – P Pedraza
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Brito – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – CF Hooge – SS Hunter – 1B Anderson – P Lozano

Sal Lozano had himself taken apart in quick fashion on Saturday. The first inning saw two Falcons runs on a Farfan double and singles by Aparicio and Cook, while in the third inning he nailed two batters and conceded another two base hits for another pair of runs. Esperanza and Salto got RBI’s in that inning. Lozano then drew a 1-out walk in the bottom 3rd, with the bags filling via Berto and Fernandez singles. Pedraza nailed Morales to push in a 2-out run, 4-1, but Balaski grounded out to to Farfan to strand a full set. Lozano got a sac fly in the fourth, hitting a fly to center after Hooge and Hunter had landed base hits and getting Hoogey home from third base. Berto then popped out to end the inning, still down 4-2.

Lozano didn’t make it past the fifth thanks to plentiful chaos early on, which had the additional benefit of getting the regularly unhinged bullpen into the game that much sooner. Reyna doubled off Lindstrom in the sixth, and Jose Farfan hit a 2-run home run, 6-2. Justin LeClerc and Aparicio also reached base after that, leading to Lindstrom getting yanked for Campbell, who gave up an RBI double before Balaski got paws on an Esperanza drive to finally end the inning. Farfan singled home a 2-out run off Campbell in the seventh, one of three batters to reach in *that* miserable inning. Nick Lando made his debut in the bottom 7th, pinch-hitting for Campbell and flying out to center before the 1-2-3 batters unleashed three singles for a pity run. He got to bat again in the ninth against Josh Livingston, hitting a 1-out single to left for his first big-league souvenir. He reached third base on Ramos’ single, after which Kilmer hit for Garavito and walked. Since this was an 8-3 game, the tying run now appeared in the on-deck circle in Morales, with Manny Fernandez batting. Lando scored on a single to center. Then it was over quite suddenly, with Tony Morales poking a 2-1 pitch at Farfan, to Aparicio, to LeClerc, fín. 8-4 Falcons. Ramos 3-5; Brito 2-4; Fernandez 3-5, 2 RBI;

I really like it when they almost look like they’re gonna rally.

And then – ka-whoom!

I really like that.

But at least Lando’s a .500 batter now.

Game 3
CHA: 3B Farfan – CF J. Reyna – SS Aparicio – C M. Cook – RF C. Robinson – LF Esperanza – 1B Salto – 2B A. Rojas – P Lerma
POR: 3B Ramos – SS Hunter – CF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Kilgallen – 1B Salazar – 2B Lando – LF de Wit – P Chavez

The Falcons slapped single upon single off Bernie Chavez, driving in runs with Chris Robinson and Ruben Esperanza with two outs for a 2-0 lead before Salto grounded out to Hunter. Portland would make up one of the runs in the second inning, with Kilmer reaching base, then advancing on a wild pitch and two groundouts to score. While Bernie did not allow another base hit until a Reyna single in the fifth, the Raccoons also weren’t exactly hitting it out of the park. They didn’t get another base knock after the Kilmer single until Nick Lando singled with two outs in the bottom 5th. He then stole his first bag, which led to an intentional walk to the more hapless Jay de Wit, and then to Bernie flicking a 2-out single to center that was enough for Lando to race around and score with the tying run. Berto flew out to left to end the insurrection.

Bernie Chavez then held the fort for another two innings before Kilgallen and Salazar began the bottom 7th with a pair of singles off Lerma that put them on the corners. Before Lando could do more heroics, a wild pitch by Lerma plated the go-ahead run. The Coons then went down strikeout, groundout, popout. Bernie was back for the eighth, gave up singles to Reyna and Cook and left having gotten only one out. Chuck Jones came out for Robinson, but Esperanza pinch-hit quickly and grounded out just as quickly. When Ryan Lorensen batted for Esperanza, another righty bat, the Raccoons sent Alex Ramirez, who secured a strikeout and starved runners in scoring position! The Coons then got an insurance run when Hunter tripled and Manny singled in the bottom 8th, 4-2, after which Kilgallen hit a 2-out single and Salazar was nailed. Lando flew out to right to strand a full set, but Alex Ramirez remained steady in the ninth to save the game. 4-2 Coons. Kilgallen 2-4; Chavez 7.1 IP, 8 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 0 BB, 3 K, W (4-9) and 1-3, RBI; Ramirez 1.1 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K, SV (4);


In other news

August 22 – TOP INF/RF/LF Felix Marquez (.308, 9 HR, 50 RBI) will miss two to three weeks with back soreness.
August 24 – NAS 3B/2B Jim “Mastodon” Allen (.374, 8 HR, 51 RBI) has a 20-game hitting streak after landing a single in the Sox’ 4-3 loss to the other Sox of the Gold variety.
August 24 – Canadiens OF Aaron Foss (.299, 5 HR, 56 RBI) drops two hits in a 12-3 rout of the Condors to also reach a 20-game hitting streak.
August 26 – Everything falls apart in Salem, as Wolves SP Phil Harrington (15-4, 2.24 ERA) is announced to have a torn UCL and will miss the rest of this and maybe all of next season.
August 26 – SFW CL Andy Hyden (4-3, 3.19 ERA, 29 SV) saves his 400th game in a 3-1 win over the Rebels. Hyden, a #13 pick, spent all his career in the Federal League and mostly with the Cyclones. The 34-year-old has a 56-58 record with a 2.96 ERA. He was an All Star four times and the Reliever of the Year in 2036.
August 26 – The hitting streak of VAN OF Aaron Foss (.296, 5 HR, 56 RBI) ends at 20 games after an 0-for-4 in a 9-1 loss to the Condors.
August 26 – MIL SP Sal Chavez (12-10, 3.73 ERA) 3-hits the Knights in a 3-0 shutout.
August 26 – IND 3B Dan Hutson (.242, 24 HR, 68 RBI) drops five hits and ends a triple shy of the cycle while driving in thre runs in a 10-2 rush of the Bayhawks.
August 26 – PIT 3B/2B Ben Freeman (.255, 7 HR, 49 RBI) hits two home runs and two singles and drives in seven runs from the #7 spot in a 14-5 bombing of the Pacifics.

FL Player of the Week: PIT 3B/2B Ben Freeman (.255, 7 HR, 49 RBI), hitting .480 (12-25) with 2 HR, 13 RBI
CL Player of the Week: SFB 1B Salvador Ayala (.311, 10 HR, 54 RBI), batting .435 (10-23) with 3 HR, 6 RBI

Complaints and stuff

The season keeps dragging on, now with even more injuries and even more weird AAA players that we never thought we’d talk about again. Jay de Wit is a switch-hitter, meaning he is equally harmless from both sides of the plate. Nick Lando did some stirring in two games, but his scouting report says he’s a worse version of Jose Brito, who is currently grossly overperforming.

Both Maldonado and Trevino will be back this year, which is at least something. It’s entirely possible that they will be traded this winter. Maldonado is not *likely* to be traded, but he’s not nailed down either, and I can’t tell you of a position player that is.

This homestand will last through all of next week, with three games against the Aces and four against the Indians. The horror though has yet to end, with two more trips to Boston and one more journey to Elk City being on the September program.

31 games left. (sigh)

And then however many seasons until the team is watchable again.

What is it, Maud? – Not good enough for the sales pitch? – *Fine*. – (artificially joyful) And don’t forget to reserve your 2041 ticket plans now! There will be baseball – in some form or other – and maybe even a win here or there! (keeps the stupid grin even after finishing)

Fun Fact: Nelson Moreno is 3-0 with a 1.94 ERA in his last six starts!

Future star!

Was definitely worth the trouble of not including him in any of the trades for the last 34 players we didn’t get that would have pushed the team over the hump to a title…

[DD Martin]

Bernie Chavez would make his first appearances coming back from rehab.

Wow 2-0 since coming back from rehab. You should have sent him several years ago!

[Westheim]

Originally Posted by DD Martin

Wow 2-0 since coming back from rehab. You should have sent him several years ago!

Should be start operating on Nels right now so he'll never suck?

+++

Raccoons (64-67) vs. Aces (65-66) – August 27-29, 2040

Offense was the problem for the Aces, who ranked third from the bottom in runs scored, while their pitching was *alright* and fifth in runs allowed. The rotation was much better than the perpetually porous bullpen, though. Vegas was up 4-2 in the season series.

Projected matchups:
Ian Wilson (4-3, 2.14 ERA) vs. Willie Gallardo (10-11, 4.43 ERA)
Nelson Moreno (5-5, 2.96 ERA) vs. Oscar Valdes (12-9, 2.89 ERA)
Raffaello Sabre (11-7, 3.16 ERA) vs. Chris Crowell (10-13, 3.11 ERA)

Only right-handed opposition to be found here.

Game 1
LVA: CF Beaudoin – SS O’Keefe – 1B Levis – C Wiersma – RF Jorgensen – 3B Rossi – 2B D. Richardson – LF Velazquez – P W. Gallardo
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Brito – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – CF Hooge – SS Hunter – 1B Salazar – P Wilson

Ian Wilson had one of those frustrating starts, conceding three hits, three walks, and a hit batter in the first two innings alone, but only one run. That one was of course driven in by Ken Wiersma with a first-inning single, because it’s always those infuriatingly clinical no-name guys, and every team seems to have one. Wiersma was batting all of .236 for the year. Wilson walked even Willie Gallardo the first time through, and all the early “excitement” meant that he was toast after just five innings, despite not allowing more than that one first-inning run. The Raccoons were not doing anything worth reporting and couldn’t even turn a 2-base error that put Damian Salazar on base in the bottom 5th into anything countable. When Gallardo then conceded a leadoff double to Jose Brito and a home run to Manny Fernandez in the sixth inning and the score was flipped, it came as quite the shock indeed, because heretofore nothing had hinted at even the potential of a comeback from a 1-0 deficit. Balaski hit a 1-out single in the inning that led to nothing, then threw away a baseball in the seventh inning that gifted a run to the Aces; Chris O’Keefe and Doug Levis hit back-to-back singles, and Balaski tried to throw out O’Keefe going to third base. He didn’t even find the vicinity of third base, O’Keefe instead scored, and the game was tied at two at the stretch.

More offensive sadness sent the game to extras, ultimately, with the Raccoons getting Tony Hunter to second base with one out in the ninth before both Salazar and Kilmer struck out. Berto drew a leadoff walk off Damon DeOrio to begin the bottom 10th, stole second base (like Hunter had done), and then was stranded with two grounders to short and a fly to left by Morales. Top 11th, Tony Hunter hurt himself on a defensive play. Since the bench was already picked thin at that point, the Raccoons had to shift Berto back to shortstop for the first time in years, with Jay DeWit filling in at the hot corner. No ball came their way in the inning, deWit hit a 2-out double in the bottom of the frame, his first major league hit, and then was stranded when Salazar AGAIN struck out. Brent Clark put two aboard in the 12th inning, but somehow wiggled out of it, with Berto making the final play. He then hit a double off Derek Barker with nobody out in the bottom of the inning – but with Oliver Anderson already on first base. They reached scoring position, after which the Aces got Brito to strike out and walked Manny with intent. Then Barker threw a wild pitch to end the charade. 3-2 Coons. Brito 2-6; Fernandez 3-5, BB, HR, 2B, 2 RBI; de Wit 1-1, 2B; Anderson (PH) 1-1; Zabala 2.0 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 2 K; Campbell 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K;

I’d say “like glue”, but that would be mean to glue.

Hunter was out with a strained hamstring, which would probably cost him the rest of the season. When I called St. Pete for another player, at first nobody answered on the first 15 tries. Then I reached the cleaning lady, who only spoke Spanish. Apparently there was barely anybody left in St. Pete to call up, but she found good old Jon Caskey and sent him to the airport.

Sigh.

Game 2
LVA: CF Velazquez – RF Jorgensen – SS O’Keefe – 3B Rossi – LF O. Burgos – 2B D. Richardson – 1B Zarazua – C D. Gomez – P O. Valdes
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Brito – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – CF Hooge – 1B Salazar – SS Caskey – P Moreno

Yes, Nels, that is all the lineup I can give you anymore. – No, it will not get better any time soon.

The defense also didn’t get any better, with only ho-hum options left at short, like f.e. Caskey. Nelson Moreno scattered two hits in the first, then two more in the fourth. Unfortunately in the latter inning one was a Nate Rossi double and the Aces got the first run of the game, while the Raccoons were again dead from the waist up … and, crucially, also dead from the waist down. Top 5th, back-to-back singles by Ricardo Zarazua and Danny Gomez began the inning, and with Zarazua making for third base, Balaski *again* threw the ball into no man’s land. Zarazua scored, Gomez went to second, and it was 2-0. Moreno retired the next three in order to at least strand Gomez, and bitterly fought his way around leadoff doubles to right in the next two innings to strand both those runners (O’Keefe, Zarazua) at third base. Moreno was hit for with Tony Morales as the tying run in the bottom 7th, but Morales flew out to left, and Caskey was stranded.

Despite all the suck so far, the Raccoons would have the tying runs in scoring position in the ninth inning. Granted, they did so in unearned fashion, with Kilmer reaching on a 1-out error by Jeff van Brunt, after which Hoogey hit a double to right, by far the loudest hit the Coons had so far in the game. Anderson hit for Salazar against Derek Barker, one of those random ex-Coons, singled to right, and one run scored. Kilgallen hit for Caskey for a sac fly. Nick Lando hit for Garavito, struck out, and we had extras again …! Yay, lucky us! David Lindstrom pitched three scoreless innings in overtime then, not allowing anything major, while the Raccoons remained absolutely awful at the plate. De Wit hit for Lindstrom to begin the bottom 12th, last guy on the bench, and struck out. Berto singled, Brito grounded out, Manny grounded out, and the worst game ever yet continued.

We continued with three scoreless innings by Brent Clark, who also got to strike out in between, but it wasn’t like there had been anybody on base to drive in with two outs in the 14th. Ace Ricardo Sanchez was in his fourth inning in the bottom 15th and allowed a soft leadoff single to Berto, then a louder double to Brito. Berto had to stop at third base. Fernandez popped out. Kilmer was walked intentionally and new reliever Marty Madera now had the bags full. Balaski hit a 2-1 pitch to second, van Brunt fired home, and the Raccoons were wrapped up in a 4-2-3 double play. Madera then hit a 2-out RBI single off a tuckered-out Juan Zabala in the top 16th, after Zabala had walked both Rossi and Ozzie Burgos. Hooge, Anderson, and Kilgallen made swift outs in the bottom of the inning before the pitcher’s spot would have become involved again. 3-2 Aces. Ramos 2-5, 2 BB; Brito 4-7; Moreno 7.0 IP, 8 H, 2 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 7 K; Lindstrom 3.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K; Clark 3.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 6 K;

I know, Nels, I know. – No, you’re great. I suggest you start swinging for the fences though.

The Raccoons returned .250 hitter Nick Lando to AAA and called up Francisco Pena, the miserable sucker.

Any fresh arm in a storm…

Game 3
LVA: CF Velazquez – RF Jorgensen – SS O’Keefe – 1B Levis – 3B Rossi – LF O. Burgos – 2B van Brunt – C D. Gomez – P Crowell
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Brito – CF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Hooge – 1B Anderson – LF de Wit – SS Caskey – P Sabre

The order of business for Sabre was that if he pitched a shutout and drove in his own run, that was fine, but if he couldn’t do that, he was supposed to at least give up six so the stupid **** brigade couldn’t tie the game by accident in the ninth inning and we’d then play 20 innings of sillyball. He probably wouldn’t, because he loaded the bases with walks (Burgos, van Brunt) and a nailed batter (Gomez) with two outs in the second and only barely escaped on Crowell’s grounder to Ramos. The Coons actually took a 1-0 lead on a random homer by Jon Caskey in the bottom 3rd, but Sabre nailed Rossi in the fourth and then allowed singles to Burgos and van Brunt, stacking the bags with nobody out. *Somehow* the Aces popped out until the inning was over and stranded another three. Top 5th, Levis hit a 2-out double to left, then turned third base on Rossi’s single to leftfield. De Wit threw him out, ending the inning, but Burgos’ leadoff double in the sixth finally broke the camel’s back. Van Brunt singled, and Gomez tied the game on a sac fly before the Aces fizzled out again. Oh good, now we’re set up for 20 innings!

Bottom 7th, game still tied at one, and that sounded like a lot given the lack of action. Hoogey and Anderson opened the inning with singles past either side of van Brunt, bringing up the misery division at the bottom of the order. De Wit flew out, but Caskey singled to right, loading the bases for PH Jeff Kilmer, who squeezed a walk out of Crowell in a full count, forcing home the go-ahead run. Berto added a sac fly, while Brito flew out to center to end the inning. Chuck Jones and Marty Madera both survived a hit and a walk in the eighth, with the former also collecting a groundout from John Velazquez in the ninth before right-handed batters got Alex Ramirez involved. Walk, passed ball, walk – and the tying runs were on base. I was cramming gunpowder down the blunderbuss barrel while Levis popped out. Rossi grounded to third base, Caskey made the play, and somehow the Coons won a game yet again. 3-1 Blighters. Hooge 2-3, BB; Anderson 2-4; Caskey 2-3, HR, RBI; Kilmer (PH) 0-0, BB, RBI; Sabre 7.0 IP, 7 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 3 BB, 3 K, W (12-7);

…!

Raccoons (66-68) vs. Indians (48-85) – August 30-September 2, 2040

Was it worth it unlocking the ballpark for this series? The two teams were a combined 58 1/2 games out of first place, so I’d go with the under on whatever estimate for attendance you’d give me. The Indians remained worst in the league in both offense and preventing said offense to the other team. Their run differential was -209, and their situation was only not hopeless because they had seven left with these completely inept Raccoons. We somehow led the season series, 7-4.

Projected matchups:
Sal Lozano (2-3, 5.20 ERA) vs. Jake Jackson (7-13, 4.14 ERA)
Bernie Chavez (4-9, 5.03 ERA) vs. Manuel Herrera (9-15, 4.47 ERA)
Ian Wilson (4-3, 2.12 ERA) vs. Alex Flores (4-14, 4.78 ERA)
Nelson Moreno (5-5, 2.85 ERA) vs. Ayden Cobb (3-5, 3.06 ERA)

We’d draw their four right-handers. Rosters would expand on Saturday, although I am not sure there’s anything in St. Pete that we’re keen to move here.

Game 1
IND: CF Crocker – 3B Hutson – C Mordino – 1B Dodson – 2B E. Vargas – LF Zimmerman – SS D. Serrato – RF A. Torres – P J. Jackson
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Brito – CF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – SS Kilgallen – 1B Salazar – LF de Wit – P Lozano

Nick Crocker ripped a triple to begin the game and the Indians failed to score, which was the sort of opener that made people in the seats turn to the nearest guy around – usually three rows away – and ask “how long’s this series gonna be? FOUR games??” … Lozano allowed another hit to Crocker the next time around, a 2-out single in the third that led nowhere. The Coons scored a run in the bottom of that inning on singles by Berto and Manny, and it felt like that was gonna be all for the day.

But no, excitement arrived in the form of injury, with Lozano waving for Dr. Padilla after 3.2 innings and requiring replacement. Francisco Pena got the ball, struck out Enrique Vargas, and was spotted a *whole* more run in the bottom of the inning, with de Wit singling home Balaski for his first career RBI. (Don’t bother checking, he’s 2-for-15)

Pena pitched another two scoreless innings before walking Pat Dodson and Vargas to begin the seventh. He got another two out before reaching 57 pitches and started to pant, at which point we went to Garavito in a double switch, but the Indians batted right-handed Nick O’Leary for Alberto Torres. Then O’Leary flew out easily to left, stranding the tying runs. The Raccoons remained spiritually linked to the Indians’ offensive rages, with de Wit grounding out, Anderson popping out, and Berto striking out in the bottom of the inning. Jim Drews hit an infield single in the top 8th. Then he was doubled up. The Coons got Brito on with a leadoff double off Nate Norris, who walked Manny. Then Morales sponged into a double play. Balaski was walked intentionally (…!) to bring up Matt Kilgallen, who hit a floater to shallow left where Dave Serrato and Jason Zimmerman shooed another off and the ball dropped for an RBI single. The Raccoons then let Jermaine Campbell bat, because we kinda needed him for the ninth inning. He hit a ******* RBI single to left-center. De Wit flew out, and the Indians remained miserable to conclude the game. 4-0 Raccoons. Fernandez 2-3, BB, RBI; Balaski 1-2, BB; Kilgallen 2-4, RBI; Lozano 3.2 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 3 K; Pena 3.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 4 K, W (4-1); Campbell 1.2 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 0 K, SV (3) and 1-1, RBI;

(blinks)

Game 2
IND: CF Crocker – RF A. Torres – 3B Hutson – 1B Dodson – 2B E. Vargas – SS D. Serrato – C Alfonso – LF Garbinski – P M. Herrera
POR: RF Balaski – 2B Brito – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – CF Hooge – SS Kilgallen – 1B Anderson – 3B Caskey – P Chavez

Two hits and Bernie’s own error gave the Indians an unearned run in the first inning. Brito and Kilmer countered with singles of their own, and the bases filled up when Hoogey drew a walk. Manuel Herrera gave up the lead with a wild pitch before Kilgallen could fly out poorly. The rush of offense subsided quickly after that, although Kilgallen hit a leadoff double in the fourth when there was nobody to plate in scoring position anymore. Anderson singled to right, moving Kilgallen to third base, and Jon Caskey flew out to center. Kilgallen made for home, scored, and it was 2-1 Critters. The inning fizzled out really quick after that, but with one out in the fifth the Raccoons were encroaching on Herrera again. Manny walked, Kilmer doubled, and they were in scoring position for Hoogey, who was put on intentionally. Kilgallen promptly struck out, but Oliver Anderson zinged a hit to right to score a pair. Caskey flew out to Torres, leaving Bernie up 4-1 after five.

When the Indians reached the corners in the seventh, they did so on a Caskey error and a Josh Garbinski single, and only with two outs. O’Leary hit for Herrera and grounded out to Brito, keeping Bernie largely trouble-free, although he had run a 3-0 count to Serrato before the runners had reached and Serrato had poked and grounded out. Bernie then hit a 2-out RBI single off Mike Haertl in the bottom 7th, plating Anderson. Balaski brought in Caskey with another single, and Bernie scored on Brito’s single off new pitcher Felipe Jacquez. Manny then hit a blast to right to put the game away for good. Bernie lasted eight innings on 104 pitches, with Zabala and Garavito combining for the ninth. 10-1 Raccoons. Balaski 2-5, RBI; Brito 2-5, RBI; Fernandez 1-2, 3 BB, HR, 3 RBI; Kilmer 2-5, 2B; Anderson 2-4, BB, 2 RBI; Caskey 2-3, RBI; Chavez 8.0 IP, 6 H, 1 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 6 K, W (5-9) and 1-4, RBI;

That game put the Coons back at .500, even with the Loggers for third place, and ended the 25-man roster phase of the season as rosters expanded for Saturday. The Raccoons added only two batters as Nick Lando was recalled in addition to a third catcher in Chris Lancaster, batting a solid .200 in St. Petersburg. On the pitching side we added Nelson Fonseca and Ryan van Campenhout.

The Indians got funny and gave a spot start to Luke Moses (1-2, 3.35 ERA), who had made 40 relief appearances so far this season. Well, he was still a right-hander…

Game 3
IND: CF Crocker – 3B Hutson – C Mordino – 2B E. Vargas – LF Zimmerman – SS D. Serrato – 1B J. Diaz – RF A. Torres – P Moses
POR: 3B Ramos – CF Hooge – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – SS Kilgallen – 1B Anderson – 2B Lando – P Wilson

Portland was up quick with Manny walking and Tony Morales whacking a homer to right-center for a 2-0 edge, but the Indians erased it just the same way two innings later. Nick Crocker walked, Dan Hutson rammed a ball outta leftfield, and it was a 2-2 tie. In between, Lando had hit a 2-out triple in the second inning, but there had been nobody on base and Wilson was no help, either. Top 4th, Jason Zimmerman singled, Dave Serrato homered, and it looked like the Raccoons were actually having an uphill battle on their paws even at these depths of the baseball class ladder. Wilson loaded the bases with the 3-4-5 batters in the fifth inning, mixing in a hit, a walk, and a welt to Zimmerman, then was knocked out by Serrato’s 2-out, 2-run single. Ramirez replaced him, got the K, and ended the inning, but was knocked around for three hits and two runs in the sixth inning before being replaced by van Campenhout, which was a clear white flag in an 8-2 game, in which the Indians had just put up their fourth consecutive 2-run inning. The useless right-hander van Campenhout then walked FIVE batters in the seventh inning, including Moses, who probably hadn’t held a bat since stickball times. Alberto Torres mixed in a double, too, so three runs were across and three runners on base when Pena replaced van Campenhout, gave up an RBI single, and ran the score to 12-2 before striking out Zimmerman. Bottom 7th, the Raccoons loaded the bases with nobody out with Balaski, Lancaster, and Anderson. Lando brought in a meaningless run with a groundout, which was still better than Caskey’s pop. Berto hit an RBI single, but Hooge flew out to center to strand two, not that it mattered anymore. 12-4 Indians. Ramos 2-4, RBI; Morales 1-2, BB, HR, 2 RBI;

Dr. Padilla reported that Sal Lozano had back spasms that might last a few more days. He may or may not miss his next start. With that, we’d keep Nelson Fonseca out of the Sunday and Monday games; he was the closest thing to another starter on the roster, which was sad enough.

Game 4
IND: CF Crocker – RF A. Torres – 3B Hutson – 1B Dodson – C E. Thompson – 2B E. Vargas – SS D. Serrato – LF Drews – P A. Flores
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Brito – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – SS Kilgallen – CF Hooge – 1B Salazar – P Moreno

Early on, home runs by Manny Fernandez and Alberto Torres created a 1-1 situation on the scoreboard that smelled like 15 innings once more because nobody else seemed to have much of a grasp about hitting. Things didn’t get interesting except for the bombs until the fifth inning, which Moreno opened with a leadoff walk – meaning he drew one from Flores. Berto also walked and Brito wasted no time and hit into a 6-4-3 double play. After an intentional walk to Manny Fernandez, Kilmer clipped an RBI single to center, giving the Coons the 2-1 lead. Balaski flew out to Crocker, ending the inning.

Moreno, who had only allowed three hits through six, was then beaten to begin the seventh with Pat Dodson hitting a double over Balaski before Elliott Thompson hit a ball over the fence entirely, flipping the score to 3-2 Indians. Serrato hit *another* home run and Moreno was knocked out when Flores, of all people, hit a 2-out single. Chuck Jones would get out of the inning after another single conceded to Crocker. In a perfect world, the Raccoons would now rally for the 21-year-old rookie and pick him up. Well, how perfect was this world? They were retired in order in the seventh, but Kilmer and Balaski went to the corners with the tying runs in the eighth, knocking 1-out hits. Kilgallen hit a sac fly before Hooge popped to second base, where Juan Munoz dropped the ball. With Nate Norris coming in, Tony Morales batted for Salazar, the wimp, got a hanger, and BLASTED it over the fence! 3-run homer!! Brent Clark got the 6-4 lead in the ninth, not because he was reinstated as closer but because lefty bats were expected to show up, like Drews to begin the inning. Drews promptly singled, then was doubled up on a grounder hit by Sal Mordino. Crocker singled again, but Zimmerman struck out. 6-4 Furballs. Kilmer 2-4, 2B, RBI; Balaski 2-4; Morales (PH) 1-1, HR, 3 RBI;

In other news

August 27 – The hitting streak of Nashville’s Jim “Mastodon” Allen (.372, 10 HR, 54 RBI) ends after 22 games in a 2-0 over the Stars.
August 27 – The Buffaloes beat the Pacifics, 16-7, with ten of their runs scoring in the sixth inning alone.
August 28 – The Thunder walk off, 5-4, against the Indians when with the Indians still up by a run and the bases loaded, left-hander Joe Robinson (5-9, 6.03 ERA) hits consecutive batters. 2B/3B Bill McWhirter (.274, 5 HR, 37 RBI) and C Jesus Adames (.300, 12 HR, 75 RBI) hold still for the good of the team.
August 30 – ATL SP Ryan Bedrosian (11-2, 1.94 ERA) 2-hits the Bayhawks in a 5-0 Atlanta effort.
August 30 – SAL SP Andy Jimenes (9-10, 3.62 ERA) will miss 10 months with a damaged elbow ligament.

FL Player of the Week: SAL RF Troy Greenway (.226, 15 HR, 49 RBI), batting .400 (12-30) with 3 HR, 10 RBI
CL Player of the Week: OCT RF/1B/LF John Marz (.313, 18 HR, 76 RBI), hitting .450 (9-20) with 3 HR, 6 RBI

FL Hitter of the Month: DAL 2B/SS Oscar Aguirre (.288, 8 HR, 32 RBI), hitting .350 with 6 HR, 21 RBI
CL Hitter of the Month: VAN 2B/SS Ramon Cabral (.291, 11 HR, 58 RBI), batting .391 with 4 HR, 26 RBI
FL Pitcher of the Month: SAL SP John Gano (14-6, 2.89 ERA), hurling for a 6-0 record with 1.36 ERA, 47 K
CL Pitcher of the Month: VAN SP Matt Sealock (19-3, 2.33 ERA), tossing to a 5-0 record with 1.77 ERA, 30 K
FL Rookie of the Month: SAC 1B/LF/RF Eddie Moreno (.280, 10 HR, 36 RBI), batting .350 with 9 HR, 29 RBI
CL Rookie of the Month: VAN OF Aaron Foss (.296, 6 HR, 57 RBI), hitting .371 with 3 HR, 24 RBI

Complaints and stuff

Don’t ask why Moreno is not also Hitter of the Month. I asked the league stuff like that in the past. They never answer in coherent fashion. They don’t know what the **** they’re doing.

Same is true for this team, really…

That Aces series was the worst series ever that the Raccoons actually won. Eight runs scored in 36 innings of “hitting”. How that was enough for two wins will never be explained in a satisfying way.

Why not more callups? Well, do we *need* more players? Also, there were lots of injuries even in the minors this year and there is no point in stripping them to the bones and risking injuries due to overworking them when all the Raccoons stand to gain is finishing ahead of the Loggers. I’d rather finish behind the Loggers and get the #12 pick without having two tired and dazed AA outfielders slam into each other face-to-face.

Sunday’s win put the season series with the Indians away (10-5), conceivably the only one we’ll win this year against CL North opposition. The damn Elks (cough), Loggers, and Crusaders all already have 9+ wins against the Coons. Only the Titans remain, with things currently locked at six against them. We’ll proceed to sort this out immediately with a three-game set in Boston to start next week. We’ll then go back home to play the Loggers.

Fun Fact: Saturday’s utter beating was the 5,000th regular season loss for this team against 5,345 wins.

Makes us a .517 team in the regular season, which is the fifth-best mark in the league. Only the Titans, Warriors, Capitals, and Condors are better, and the Condors are only a couple of games ahead.

The damn Elks? Ninth in a pack of .504 teams. Which is what we’ll have to conjure up as soul-soother once they’ve won another title this fall, tying the Coons with four rings.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (69-69) @ Titans (76-59) – September 3-5, 2040

The season series with the Titans was even at six, which sounded like the Raccoons were due a few more losses. Boston pretty much had given up on the playoffs at this point, sitting out by a dozen games with only four weeks to play. They were fifth in runs scored, third in runs allowed. Their offense was in the top 3 in on-base percentage, but lacked speed and power (minus Willie Vega’s 23 homers), and just couldn’t put the humming machines back together.

Projected matchups:
Raffaello Sabre (12-7, 3.09 ERA) vs. Blake Sciulli (3-4, 5.06 ERA)
Sal Lozano (2-3, 4.81 ERA) vs. Mario Gonzalez (12-4, 2.67 ERA)
Bernie Chavez (5-9, 4.70 ERA) vs. Seth Green (3-0, 3.18 ERA)

Right, left, right, then a day off. The Titans would then play another game against Oregonians, having a makeup game with the Wolves on Thursday.

Game 1
POR: 3B Ramos – SS Kilgallen – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – CF Hooge – 2B Lando – 1B Salazar – P Sabre
BOS: SS Gil – RF J. Davis – CF Vermillion – 1B A. Zacarias – LF W. Vega – C Duryea – 3B Bunyon – 2B Toney – P Sciulli

Mark Vermillion put Boston in front with a solo shot in the first inning, bot Portland countered with three in the top of the second. Balaski and Hooge opened with singles, Damian Salazar – of all people – hit an RBI double, and Sabre’s groundout and Berto’s single each brought in another run. Boston shrugged, Michael Duryea walked and Donovan Bunyon doubled in the bottom 2nd, and Sciulli and Antonio Gil hit a pair of singles to tie the game at three. Sabre never got into a groove, though, even after the Raccoons took a 4-3 lead in the fourth inning after Ed Hooge’s leadoff triple and Nick Lando’s groundout. The Titans put two more runners aboard in the fourth, three more in he fifth, with Gil singling and Alex Zacarias and Willie Vega drawing walks, and somehow stranded all of them, but a confused Sabre was out of the game after five.

Then all the offense suddenly died. For the next three innings, there was a Kilgallen single … and that was it for base hits. Zabala, Garavito, and Ramirez pitched hit- and scoreless relief for Portland through eight. In the ninth, the Coons got a leadoff single from pinch-hitter Oliver Anderson. Berto hit into a double play and that was pretty much the inning. Portland turned to Chuck Jones for the ninth inning, getting a walk to rookie Bobby Mendoza with two outs for discomfort, but Antonio Gil grounded out to end the game. 4-3 Raccoons. Balaski 2-4, 2B; Hooge 2-4, 3B; Salazar 2-4, 2B, RBI; Anderson (PH) 1-1;

Where is that sort of clutch holding-it-together when we play the damn Elks?

Tuesday brought persistent rain and zero baseball, meaning we’d get a double header on Wednesday. The Raccoons flipped their pitchers around, with Bernie Chavez pitching in the opener. The Titans did not.

Game 2
POR: 3B Ramos – CF Kilgallen – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – 1B Anderson – 2B Lando – SS Caskey – LF de Wit – P Chavez
BOS: SS Gil – RF J. Davis – CF Vermillion – 1B A. Zacarias – LF W. Vega – C Duryea – 3B Santillan – 2B Toney – P M. Gonzalez

Unsurprisingly, the Raccoons’ idea of a lineup caused little stir, but at least Bernie Chavez wasn’t exactly cheated out of a win, having his worst start since coming back from injury and falling 2-0 behind on a Vermillion homer in the third inning. John Davis was on base to score, and Antonio Gil could have been, had he stopped at third base on the prior play and not been thrown out at home plate by Jay de Wit. While that was all the runs scored through six innings, Bernie Chavez was a real mess and needed over 110 pitches just to make it through six. The Raccoons had only two base hits against Gonzalez and looked very much defeated already. Kilmer, Balaski, and Anderson were sat down in order in the seventh, but Jon Caskey shone with a whole single in the eighth inning. de Wit made a poor out. Manny pinch-hit against Mike Hugh, but was instead faced with a left-hander in Daniel Miller and popped out, ending the inning. Gilberto Castillo pitched in the ninth inning, facing the top of the order. Berto grouded out. Hooge hit for Kilgallen and grounded out. Kilmer whiffed. 2-0 Titans.

Blargh.

Game 3
POR: 2B Brito – CF Hooge – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – SS Kilgallen – 1B Anderson – 3B Caskey – P Lozano
BOS: RF J. Davis – LF W. Vega – 1B A. Zacarias – CF Vermillion – C Dear – 3B Rangel – 2B Toney – SS Gil – P S. Green

The Titans loaded the bags in the bottom of the second inning with Matt Dear getting hit by Lozano, Ruben Rangel singling, and Mike Toney reaching on a Kilgallen error on a grounder that should have ended the inning. Then both Gil and Green popped out and let Lozano off the hook anyway. Both teams remained rather impossible to watch. The Raccoons had one base hit, a Caskey single in the third inning, until Kilgallen legged out an infield single in the fifth. Anderson then hit a fat single to right, putting TWO batters on AT ONCE. Caskey then popped out, and Lozano shoved a ball into a double play… Lozano, that second inning aside, kept holding the Titans very much at bay, too – and it was *Lozano* – and maintained a 2-hitter through five.

The Raccoons remained abysmal, though. Brito hit a leadoff single in the sixth, but Hooge popped out and Manny hit into a double play, so that inning, too, was in the bin. Vega, Vermillion, and Dear then all whacked singles off Lozano in the bottom 6th, scoring a lonely run that might just as well stand up. No Raccoons reached base in the seventh. No Raccoons reached base in the eighth. Seth Green was still on a 4-hitter with seven strikeouts as he entered the ninth inning, facing the top of the order. Brito flew out to Bill Huntly in right. Hooge flew out to Vermillion in center. Fernandez flew deeper to center… but also to Vermillion. 1-0 Titans. Lozano 7.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 5 K, L (2-4);

Well, wasn’t that a bitter series…

Raccoons (70-71) vs. Loggers (69-70) – September 7-9, 2040

Here was the final series against the Loggers, who led the season series, 9-6. They were third in runs scored, ninth in runs allowed, and had a tiny +4 run differential (Coons: -1). They were leading the league in stolen bases, 122 bags in 139 games, but didn’t really do anything else all that well, being merely average in batting average and on-base percentage. They were ninth in homers, and bottoms in defense, sinking their pitching staff.

Projected matchups:
Ian Wilson (4-4, 2.64 ERA) vs. Joe Feltman (14-6, 3.75 ERA)
Nelson Moreno (5-5, 3.00 ERA) vs. Carlos Padilla (9-9, 4.73 ERA)
Raffaello Sabre (13-7, 3.15 ERA) vs. Sergio Piedra (4-12, 4.48 ERA)

We’d face all right-handers here, with no alternatives to be found in their rotation.

Also, thanks Maud, for the heads-up that Nick Valdes had flown in. – No, I donned this fake French moustache and Basque cap as disguise and he has yet to talk to me.

Game 1
MIL: 2B Lira – C F. Gomez – 3B Paul – SS Del Vecchio – 1B Brayboy – LF M. Aguirre – RF Cannizzard – CF Ronan – P Feltman
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Brito – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – CF Hooge – SS Kilgallen – 1B Salazar – P Wilson

The Loggers stole three bases and scored one run in the first inning, Tony Lira coming in on a sac fly after a single, stolen base (duh!), and a wild pitch. Then, with Jared Paul and Ted Del Vecchio in scoring position, Aaron Brayboy struck out and Mike Aguirre grounded out to Berto to somehow not have the game get away instantly. Instead, the Raccoons somehow got Brito and Morales on base with free passes in the bottom 1st, then a 3-run homer to right from Balaski to take the lead. Then it began to rain…

The rain was on and off, but what never really changed was Ian Wilson being terrible. Finally, a hit and two walks loaded the bags with Loggers in the fourth inning with nobody out. Tim Cannizzard struck out, but Joseph Ronan drew a walk in a full count to push home a run, and Feltman’s groundout scored another, tying up the game at three. Wilson then walked Tony Lira and was yanked; Lindstrom got Felipe Gomez to pop out, stranding three.

By the fifth there was a 40-minute rain delay in the 3-3 game, and Nick Valdes, who had verbally molested Cristiano Carmona and Slappy until that time, then turned to me and directly asked me who I was and that he had never seen me around here. – Me? Uh, moi? Oh, la-lá! I am … uh, Cousin André from … Marseille. – Je suis! – Non-non, I barely know this “inept, miserable bum of a GM” you talk about, monsieur.

Bottom 5th, Salazar, Berto, and Brito tumbled on base for the Raccoons, with Feltman still holding out despite the rain delay. Fernandez hit a 2-0 pitch back to Feltman for a force out at home plate, and Tony Morales flew out easily to left to do away with the chance to score, let alone score big. The following inning, Hooge walked with one out. Kilgallen singled, moving Hoogey to second base, and then Salazar swiped at an 0-2 pitch and actually poked it up the middle. Hoogey had enough of not scoring and went for it, narrowly sliding home safe ahead of Joseph Ronan’s throw, breaking the tie. And then Anderson and Ramos both grounded out pathetically. The Loggers weren’t much better either, failing to score against Pena and Jones in the next two innings. Not that the offense had any more “breakouts”. Alex Ramirez got the ball in the ninth inning. Travis Park and Tony Lira made hard outs before Gomez singled up the middle. Jared Paul also singled to center. Don’t get beaten by Ted Del Vecchio, don’t get beaten by – Ted Del Vecchio hit a fly to deep center, Hoogey chased after it … and made the catch to end the game. 4-3 Raccoons. Hooge 3-4; Salazar 2-3, RBI;

Maybe help would come from the DL, with Cosmo Trevino activated by Saturday.

Game 2
MIL: 2B Lira – RF Duncan – SS Del Vecchio – 1B Brayboy – 3B Paul – C F. Gomez – LF J. Nelson – CF Cannizzard – P C. Padilla
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – CF Hooge – SS Kilgallen – 1B Salazar – P Moreno

Cosmo walked and was caught stealing in the bottom of the first inning, so maybe help would NOT come from the DL either. On the other side of the box score, Justin Nelson hit a 2-out single in the top 2nd, stole second, Kilmer’s throw was so bad that Nelson made it to third base on the error, and Cannizzard and Padilla, too, hit two more singles to give the Loggers a 1-0 lead. While Lira grounded out after that, Nick Duncan and Ted Del Vecchio opened the third inning with soft singles before Aaron Brayboy (who?) hit a very much not soft bomb to left, extending the lead to 4-0. Valdes raged where the GM responsible for this shambles was and whether we could finally get a good player onto the team to win a championship. I was holding on firmly to the baguette I had brought for additional masquerade, biting my lip. Moreno then walked Gomez and conceded that run, too, on a 2-out hit by Cannizzard, dropping to 5-0.

The Raccoons rallied for all of one run in the bottom of the third inning. It was a Ramos Special, with Berto stealing second base as soon as he reached base and then being singled home by Cosmo. That was it for the time being, although Tony Morales hit for Moreno in the bottom 5th with Salazar on base and hit a jack to right to cut the gap in half, 5-3. Berto and Cosmo reached base after that, and while Manny flew out to left, Kilmer dropped an RBI single, 5-4. Nelson then caught Balaski’s fly near the warning track to end the inning. There, they stalled, getting nobody on in the sixth, with Nick Valdes cussing that the team was built wrong from the get-go and that it was all the stupid GM’s fault, upon which I snapped and hit him over the head with the baguette. When he glared at me, I remained in my Cousin André disguise, raised an index finger, and in the thickest faux dialect implored: “Non-non! No coeur-sing!”

Morales and Berto went to the corners with hits to begin the bottom 7th, with Cosmo’s fly to left being good enough to bring in Morales, taking Nelson Moreno of a hook I had thought would be his forever. The eighth was uneventful, but Brent Clark walked Lira to begin the ninth. Campbell replaced him, allowed a single to Del Vecchio that sent Lira to third base and Del Vecchio then stole second, all with one out. Brayboy flew out to Manny, Lira went for home – and was thrown out, ending the inning and giving the Raccoons a chance to walk off. They hit three singles off Gualter Cymbron in the bottom 9th, which somehow didn’t amount to a W for them, with Berto, at the head of the pack, always held back on singles to left by Manny and Brito. There was no holding back when Bill Balaski peppered a liner over the head of Jared Paul and up the line for a walkoff knock, though…! 6-5 Raccoons. Ramos 2-3, 2 BB; Trevino 2-3, BB, 2 RBI; Brito (PH) 1-1; Morales (PH) 2-3, HR, 2B, 2 RBI; van Campenhout 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 2 K;

Don’t get excited – van Campenhout’s ERA is still over 11.

No Piedra on Sunday, instead we’d get Cesar Perez (8-1, 4.62 ERA). This would be the 28-year-old right-handers first start in the major leagues.

Game 3
MIL: 2B Lira – RF Duncan – SS Del Vecchio – 1B Brayboy – 3B Paul – C F. Gomez – LF Torri – CF Cannizzard – P C. Perez
POR: 3B Trevino – CF Hooge – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – 1B Salazar – 2B Lando – SS Caskey – P Sabre

The Loggers scored a run in the second on two singles and Dan Torri’s sac fly, then another one in the third, in which Sabre, again not very sharp, issued a walk, a single, and a run-scoring wild pitch. Del Vecchio, Brayboy, and Gomez all landed base hits off Sabre in the fifth, amounting to another pair of runs and a 4-0 deficit. Sabre had also pitched so shoddily that he was done at that point, having taken 106 pitches through five innings… As good as new was Perez, who at that point was only 33 pitches into his gig and had made it 12 up, 12 down. Nick Valdes was raging, but I didn’t care anymore and played the accordion as obnoxiously as I could while sitting between him and Slappy on the brown couch.

The Raccoons also went three up and three down in the fifth, and made another two outs to begin the sixth, when Juan Zabala, in for long relief, hopefully, singled through the left side, which was a cataclysmic anticlimax if I had ever seen one. Cosmo singled. Hoogey walked! But now, boys, now! … Now, Manny Fernandez struck out, stranding three runners in a 4-0 game. Even I started to get a little angry at the Critters now, but there was little in the world that another glass of red wine with a few laxatives dissolved in it couldn’t put right. Jeff Kilmer hit a solo homer in the seventh, but that was all in that inning, while Perez maintained a 3-hitter. Spotted another run in the ninth against inept tossing by Garavito and Fonseca, Perez remained in the game in the bottom of the final inning of regulation, facing the sort-of-meaty left-handed part of the Raccoons’ lineup. Hooge flew out to left. Manny flew out to right. Kilmer singled. Balaski singled, too, and that knocked out Perez, one out from the complete game. Berto hit for Salazar against Gualter Cymbron and whacked an RBI single, and Tony Morales hit for Lando as the tying run and shoved a ball through between Lira and Brayboy for another single. Balaski held at third base, and the bases were loaded for Matt Kilgallen – who could not be hit for because we needed Oliver Anderson to hit for the pitcher in the #9 hole, lest we wanted to send Chris Lancaster, the only other batter remaining on the bench. On the first pitch, Kilgallen grounded out. 5-2 Loggers. Kilmer 2-4, HR, RBI; Ramos (PH) 1-1, RBI; Morales (PH) 1-1; Zabala 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 2 K and 1-1;

In other news

September 3 – DAL 2B Hugo Acosta (.351, 3 HR, 75 RBI) has five hits and five RBI in an 18-9 win over the Gold Sox.
September 4 – SAC RF/LF/1B Carlos Cortes (.309, 27 HR, 96 RBI) could be out for the season with a shoulder strain.
September 4 – LAP SP Chris Sulkey (12-12, 4.20 ERA) shuts out the Warriors on four hits in a 5-0 Pacifics win.
September 5 – There is a 10-month timetable for CIN SP Chris Inderrieden (8-10, 4.82 ERA) to return from a torn labrum.
September 6 – Thunder 1B Danny Cruz (.255, 17 HR, 52 RBI) hits his 300th home run in an 8-6 win over the Condors. The career Thunder player is a career .276/.372/.468 batter with 1,025 RBI and 1,792 hits. He is still the defending CL Player of the Year, having won his fourth home run crown and second slugging and OPS title in 2039.
September 8 – PIT OF/3B Manny del Toro (.215, 12 HR, 53 RBI) goes yard for the only score in a 1-0 Miners win over the Blue Sox.
September 9 – LAP SP Chris Sulkey (13-12, 4.01 ERA) faces the minimum and no-hits the Stars in Los Angeles, striking out eight and allowing only one walk in a 3-0 Pacifics win. DAL 2B/SS Oscar Aguirre (.236, 14 HR, 58 RBI) draws a walk, but gets doubled up. This is the fourth no-hitter in Pacifics history after those by Bob “Butcher” Haines (1984), Angel Romero (1994), and Dave Christiansen (2036).

FL Player of the Week: LAP SP Chris Sulkey (13-12, 4.01 ERA), tossing a no-hitter in a week of 2-0, no runs in 18 innings, and 12 K
CL Player of the Week: OCT C/1B Austin Raydon (.750, 2 HR, 7 RBI), batting .750 (6-8), 2 HR, 7 RBI

Complaints and stuff

Nick Valdes had an asthma attack when the Sunday game concluded, so that pacified him before I had a chance to sing a soul-soothing chanson pour l’amour.

Boring times in Portland!

In terms of mathematical shenanigans, the Raccoons were eliminated from playoff contention on Friday, despite a lame-duck 4-3 win over the Loggers. Only the Titans remained as company for the damn Elks at that point.

Will we have a protected pick next year or not? Right now there is 12 losing teams, so that would be a nope. On the other paw, what do we need a protected pick for? It’s not like we’re gonna buy the entire market in the fall.

Fun Fact: The Stars found themselves in a no-hitter for only the second time. They lost both of them.

That despite their guy, Mark Holliday, pitching a no-hitter against the Warriors in 2037. He still lost.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (72-72) @ Indians (52-91) – September 11-13, 2040

Last games with the Indians for the year, which they wished over even more than the Raccoons did. They were still bottoms in the league in runs scored and runs allowed, but were no longer rushing towards -300 run differential. In fact they had recovered *a bit* recently and now sat at -203. Such heroes! The Raccoons had already bagged the season series, 10-5, which barring a sweep over the Titans in the final week of the year would be their only season series win against a CL North opponent in 2040.

Projected matchups:
Bernie Chavez (5-10, 4.62 ERA) vs. Jake Jackson (7-14, 4.32 ERA)
Ian Wilson (4-4, 2.83 ERA) vs. Manuel Herrera (10-16, 4.37 ERA)
Nelson Moreno (5-5, 3.26 ERA) vs. Luke Moses (2-3, 3.88 ERA)

The Coons skipped Sal Lozano after an off day on Monday. The Indians had only right-handers to offer, regardless of skipping games.

Rain followed the Critters to Indianapolis though, wiping out the opener on Tuesday. A double header was scheduled for Wednesday. We stuck to our Bernie/Wilson arrangement.

Game 1
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – CF Hooge – 1B Anderson – SS Caskey – P Chavez
IND: RF D. Gonzales – LF A. Torres – 3B Hutson – 1B Dodson – C E. Thompson – SS D. Serrato – CF Crocker – 2B E. Vargas – P J. Jackson

The Raccoons initially continued their regrettable pacifist approach from the previous week, being retired for the first seven straight, but then scored the tiniest of runs in the third inning on a shy single by Jon Caskey, a bunt by Bernie, and another shy single by Berto that was just enough to get Caskey around before Cosmo struck out. For Bernie on the mount it was two walks, two hits, and two double plays in the first three innings, keeping Indy off their own board. Dan Hutson drew a leadoff walk in the fourth, but Elliott Thompson found his way into yet another double play, his second of the game.

Yes, it was anti-baseball, and the home crowd had taken the hint even before the Raccoons had come to town. The attendance was announced as 9,360 – but sure looked thinner than that. Both pitchers had 2-hitters through six innings, and when Jackson nicked Morales in the seventh, Balaski was quick to hit into a fielder’s choice at second base, then stole second base himself. Hoogey struck out, however, and the inning ended. The Raccoons loaded the bases the following inning, but with two outs. Bernie hit a single to right, then advanced on a wild pitch. Berto walked, Cosmo legged out a grounder to the left side of the mound, and Manny came up in that spot. Manny had led the Continental League in RBI in early September, then had driven in absolutely nobody last week. That changed with a brutal blast to rightfield; high, deep, long gone – GRAAAAAAAAAAND SLAAAAAAAAAMMMM!!!

Bernie now had a chance for a 5-0 shutout, but instead retired nobody to begin the bottom 8th, allowing a single to Nick Crocker and walks to Enrique Vargas and Josh Garbinski. Alex Ramirez largely dug him out, conceding one run on a sac fly by David Gonzales, and nothing else. Mauricio Garavito had a much calmer ninth inning to finish the game. 5-1 Coons. Fernandez 1-4, HR, 4 RBI; Chavez 7.0 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 5 BB, 5 K, W (6-10) and 1-2;

Game 2
POR: 2B Brito – 3B Trevino – CF Fernandez – RF Balaski – SS Kilgallen – 1B Salazar – LF de Wit – C Lancaster – P Wilson
IND: RF D. Gonzales – 3B Hutson – C Mordino – 1B Dodson – 2B E. Vargas – LF Zimmerman – SS D. Serrato – CF Crocker – P M. Herrera

The crowd remained thin and both teams stayed inept for the second half of the day’s allotment of baseball. The Raccoons couldn’t even make something out of a leadoff double by Chris Lancaster in the third inning, while the Indians would score in the bottom of the inning. Wilson walked two, including the pitcher (…) and Dan Hutson, then struck Sal Mordino in the knee with an 0-2 pitch. Mordino required replacement by Edwin Alfonso, but for consolation purposes Pat Dodson flicked a 2-out, 2-run single before Vargas flew out. Top 4th, Manny singled softly to lead things off, advanced on a wild pitch by Herrera, but Balaski’s triple would have scored him anyway, 2-1. Kilgallen tied it all up with a sac fly.

Wilson would never get a lead, and instead fell behind 3-2 in the fifth when he was taken deep to left by Dan Hutson (who hit #30, leading the CL). He also walked Serrato and Crocker with one out in the sixth to get yanked. He had walked six and struck out one in a rather dismal start. A 2-out, 2-run single David Gonzales socked off Juan Zabala assured Wilson the full allotment of runs on his ledger, with Portland then down 5-2. The Raccoons nevertheless rallied in the seventh with a string of 2-out singles starting with Lancaster. Kilmer and Brito also hit singles to load the bags, and Cosmo scored two with yet another single to center. Manny, he of the big knock in the first game, settled for the fifth single in a row, plating Brito to tie the game at five. After Balaski walked and filled the bases, Berto batted for Kilgallen and slapped a 2-run single to center for a 7-5 lead. The Indians only now replaced their pitcher after seven straight Critters had reached base. Nate Norris walked Anderson, hitting for Salazar, before Jay de Wit flew out to center, thus making the second and third outs in the same inning on different plays. Good job, Jay. Good job. Stay you.

The 7-5 lead survived the pitchery of both Jermaine Campbell and Ryan van Campenhout through eight innings, with Berto doubling home Manny in the ninth for a tack-on run. When the Indians began the bottom 9th with pinch-hitter Josh Garbinski, the Raccoons sent Chuck Jones for the inning, since Garavito had been used already and Brent Clark was still on my personal penalty bench. Garbinski and Gonzales grounded out. Hutson flew out to center. 8-5 Raccoons. Trevino 2-5, 2B, 2 RBI; Fernandez 3-4, BB, RBI; Ramos (PH) 2-2, 2B, 3 RBI; Lancaster 2-4, 2B; Kilmer (PH) 1-1;

Hitting safely in both ends of the double header got Cosmo to a 16-game hitting streak. Furthermore, Manny Fernandez was the first CL batter to 100 RBI and now trailed only Salem’s Jose Rivera (103).

The Raccoons got the final injury return of the season for Thursday, activating Jesus Maldonado from the DL. The remaining DL dwellers (Dominy, Hunter, Nettles) would not come back this season.

Maldo still had a paw in the batting title race, trailing only Jerry Outram among qualifiers. Maldo was batting .325 upon activation. The damn Elks was hitting .333 … The Condors’ Willie Ojeda (who we’d see on the weekend) was third with a .322 clip.

Game 3
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – SS Maldonado – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – CF Hooge – 1B Salazar – P Moreno
IND: RF D. Gonzales – LF A. Torres – 3B Hutson – 1B Dodson – C E. Thompson – SS D. Serrato – CF Crocker – 2B E. Vargas – P Moses

Dave Serrato took Nelson Moreno deep in the second for a 1-0 Indians lead, while the Raccoons took their sweet time again. Berto and Cosmo would both get on in the third inning, but Maldonado struck out and Manny grounded out to strand them. Instead an Alberto Torres double and a Hutson single gave the Indians a 2-0 lead in the bottom 3rd. And while the Indians would continue to land hits off Moreno, they also struck out quite a bit, with Nels giving up seven hits and whiffing just as many through five innings. Unfortunately Dodson had a leadoff hit in the sixth inning, Kilmer fumbled a ball that allowed him to go to second base, and Moreno didn’t get K’s against Thompson and Serrato, surrendering the run on two productive outs. That made it 3-0, while the Raccoons remained appallingly absent in the box score. Instead, Indy tacked on a run in the seventh on hits by Gonzales and Torres and a bad throw to home plate by Ed Hooge. Nelson Moreno was done after that inning, having allowed ten hits and four runs for eight strikeouts. The Raccoons would not make it to the board until the ninth inning, when Jon Caskey, of all people, socked a pinch-hit homer off Joe Robinson. And that was precisely as far as the Critters got… 4-1 Indians. Trevino 2-4; Caskey (PH) 1-1, HR, RBI;

Raccoons (74-73) @ Condors (64-82) – September 14-16, 2040

The Condors were fifth in the South, eighth in runs scored, and second from the bottom in runs allowed, giving the Raccoons yet another test of how badly they could perform against the worst pitching staffs around. This season series was also already in the Critters’ bag at 5-1.

Projected matchups:
Raffaello Sabre (13-8, 3.26 ERA) vs. Steve Corcoran (7-6, 4.62 ERA)
Sal Lozano (2-4, 4.37 ERA) vs. Edward Flinn (7-14, 4.77 ERA)
Angelo Montano (3-8, 6.42 ERA) vs. Bill Quintero (11-10, 3.63 ERA)

Corcoran would be the only southpaw opposition this week.

The Raccoons brought back Angelo Montano to make the start on Sunday. Bernie would have been next in order, but there would not be any short-rest heroics at this point.

Game 1
POR: 3B Trevino – CF Maldonado – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – 1B Salazar – 2B Lando – SS Caskey – P Sabre
TIJ: C Sawyer – SS Obando – RF Willie Ojeda – 2B Ragsdale – LF St. Pierre – 3B Toohey – CF J. Simmons – 1B Arnett – P Corcoran

Caskey took a baseball to the knee to load the bases with nobody out in the second inning after Salazar and Lando had already gotten on base with a single and a walk, respectively. Unfortunately, the next batter was the pitcher, and Sabre hit into a double play right away. At least it got Salazar across home plate… Cosmo flew out, stranding Lando at third base. The bottom half of the lineup would stir again in the fourth inning, with Balaski and Salazar reaching the corners to begin the inning, and Lando walked a second time to load the bags with nobody out. Matt Kilgallen, who had replaced Caskey, shoved a double into the gap to drive in two runs, and Sabre hit a sac fly to Willie Ojeda, 4-0. Corcoran walked Cosmo, who was still hitless and was the last Critter to do anything of use in the inning. But – that bottom of the order kept going! Damian Salazar walked with two outs in the fifth, then was doubled in by Lando, running the score to 5-0. Lando was stranded, with Kilgallen being walked intentionally and Sabre flying out to Jon St. Pierre to end the inning.

Sabre pitched five scoreless before a sudden thunderstorm scattered everybody, then dissolved as quickly as it had broken. All in all, the game was delayed for an hour. When play resumed, Maldo hit a solo jack in the sixth off Bryce Neal, 6-0. Sabre was lifted after 60 pitches, replaced in a double switch with Pena and Hoogey (for Balaski). Ed Hooge promptly drove in Nick Lando in the seventh after Lando had hit another single and had stolen second base. Lando was not retired by a Condor until the eighth inning, when he grounded out to strand the bases loaded with Maldo, Manny, and Salazar, with the Coons not scoring for the first time since the third inning. The Condors didn’t score until the ninth inning, and then with two outs. Bryce Toohey singled off Nelson Fonseca, and Justin Simmons buried a ball in the gap for an RBI triple. James Arnett then flew out to right. 7-1 Coons. Maldonado 3-6, 2B, RBI; Salazar 3-5; Lando 2-3, 2 BB, 2B, RBI; Hooge 2-2, 2B, RBI; Sabre 5.0 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K, W (14-8); Pena 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 0 K;

Jon Caskey will have to sit out for a week with a knee contusion.

Cosmo went 0-for-5 to end his 17-game hitting streak.

Game 2
POR: 3B Ramos – CF Hooge – SS Maldonado – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – 2B Lando – 1B Salazar – P Lozano
TIJ: SS Obando – C Sawyer – RF Willie Ojeda – 2B Ragsdale – 3B Toohey – CF Phinazee – LF Riquenes – 1B Vitalini – P Flinn

Lozano got shackled quickly by the Condors, allowing a run on a Guillermo Obando double and two productive outs in the first, then three runs in the second inning. Mal Phinazee and Sergio Riquenes reached base, were doubled home by Giacomino Vitalini, and that guy then scored on a pitcher-supplied single to run the tally to 4-0. The Raccoons remained meh, not getting a good chance until Maldonado hit a leadoff double in the fourth, and then three successive batters failed to even advance him 90 feet, let alone plate him. Portland only made it to the scoreboard in the fifth; Nick Lando singled, stole second, and was singled home by Berto with two down. Berto then stole second, but was stranded when Hooge flew out to Riquenes.

Lozano was yanked after just 4.1 innings after allowing a single to Flinn (again) and walking Obando in the bottom 5th. Zabala whiffed Mike Sawyer and Willie Ojeda grounded out to solve that tight spot. But Zabala was at the head of the column of the sixth inning’s 4-run bullpen explosion. One run was eventually on him, three on Brent Clark, and David Lindstrom at least gave up Obando’s 2-out, 2-run double at the end… and it was at *that* point that the offense woke up against Flinn. Salazar, Brito, and Berto all singled in the seventh inning to get one run against Flinn, and then Hoogey socked a 3-run homer, cutting the lead down to three runs. But that was also as good as it got. Balaski hit a single in the eighth. Cosmo hit a single in the ninth. Neither runner made it off first base, and the Critters lost. 8-5 Condors. Ramos 3-5, 2 RBI; Trevino (PH) 1-1; Brito (PH) 1-1;

Game 3
POR: 2B Brito – 3B Trevino – SS Maldonado – CF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – 1B Salazar – LF de Wit – P Montano
TIJ: SS Obando – C Sawyer – RF Willie Ojeda – LF St. Pierre – CF Phinazee – 2B Shay – 3B Riquenes – 1B Vitalini – P B. Quintero

Brito and Cosmo opened with singles, pulled off a double steal, and two ****** flies later still stood in scoring position. They only scored because Obando had Morales’ grounder clank off his reaching glove for a 2-out, 2-run single and the first markers on the board. In any case, Angelo Montano appeared to be just as brilliant on the mound as when he had left us, walked the first two batters he saw, and gave up a sac fly to St. Pierre in the bottom 1st. The Condors put off eating him whole early on, and instead had Quintero give up doubles to Cosmo, Manny, and Morales in the third inning to drop into a 4-1 hole. The Coons had eight hits through five innings compared to one hit for Tijuana, although Montano walked four batters and struck out only two in the first five frames.

Montano got three soft grounders for outs in the sixth inning in what despite the walks actually looked like a semi-decent start, a whole new concept for him. And then he filled the bags after all in the seventh. Phinazee walked, Adam Shay singled, and Vitalini again walked. For odd reasons probably related to tanking, the Condors did not pinch-hit for Quintero, who would indeed bat with one out and the tying runs all around the bases. The Raccoons took the bait and kept Montano in for one more batter. He surrendered a grounder to second base for one out and a run, then was lifted before Obando could do physical AND emotional harm to him. Jermaine Campbell appeared, which made the Condors send PH Vinny Chavira for Obando, but he flew out to left to end the inning. The Raccoons didn’t get another base hit until the ninth, in which Fernandez singled, and Bill Balaski, still facing Quintero, went deep to right-center to run the score to 6-2. The Raccoons grabbed the opportunity to give Mauricio Garavito his annual save – the lefty had finished the eighth inning with the 4-2 lead, then remained in and retired Tijuana in order in the ninth. 6-2 Coons. Trevino 3-4, 2B; Fernandez 2-4, 2B, RBI; Morales 2-4, 2B, 3 RBI; Garavito 1.2 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K, SV (1);

In other news

September 10 – WAS 3B/2B Rich Falzone (.257, 7 HR, 63 RBI) has his season end with a strained hip muscle.
September 11 – The Buffaloes win a rain-shortened game from the Cyclones, leading 6-1 when a storm curtails the game in the sixth inning.
September 13 – OCT SP Casey Pinter (14-10, 3.73 ERA) 3-hits the Falcons in a 2-0 shutout.
September 14 – The Warriors pick up OF Juan Garcia (.245, 3 HR, 32 RBI) from the Crusaders in a waiver deal, with New York receiving LF/RF Federico Nuno (.203, 1 HR, 11 RBI).
September 14 – DEN OF/1B Rich de Luna (.317, 5 HR, 64 RBI) is out for the year with a sprained ankle.
September 15 – Nashville’s SP Kevin Stice (12-7, 3.49 ERA) dominates the Warriors in a no-hitter, allowing just two walks and whiffing seven in a 4-0 Blue Sox win. This is the third no-hitter for the Blue Sox after Ray Shaw (1987, also against the Warriors) and Donovan Mason (2033), and the second no-hitter in the ABL in six days.
September 15 – BOS SP Mario Gonzalez (15-4, 2.49 ERA) shuts out the Falcons on a 2-hitter, Boston winning 4-0. Unfortunately for the Titans, they lose the second game of their rain-induced double-header, 12-9, which is enough to eliminate them from playoff contention and hand the CL North to the Canadiens.

FL Player of the Week: WAS C Nate Evans (.330, 11 HR, 67 RBI), hitting .520 (13-25) with 3 HR, 7 RBI
CL Player of the Week: ATL INF/RF Joe Crim (.309, 2 HR, 21 RBI), batting .424 (14-33) with 5 RBI

Complaints and stuff

Unfortunately, Maldo came cold off the DL and is now 12 points behind damn Jerry Outram for the batting title.

Two weeks left. We will spend the first at home against the Thunder and Crusaders, and the last on the road, in Elk City and Titans.

You might frown at Jay de Wit’s slash line, but please remain polite – he’s about the best Aruba has. Surely the only major leaguer they had right now. In fact, not only was de Wit the first Aruban major leaguer of his own lifetime, but of this millennium. The most-recent Aruban in the majors prior to that had been SP Samuel Bodenham, making 11 starts for the Titans in 1999 for a 3.55 ERA. Then he promptly tore his UCL and was never decent again.

That was in the barbaric times when they still snipped ligaments from elsewhere in your body to implant it into the elbow. Nowadays they’re just 4D-printed. Isn’t that right, Dr. Padilla? Still remembering the old butcher times? (hits Dr. Padilla on the shoulder just as he’s injecting something into Jon Caskey’s knee)

(Jon Caskey whines)

Legit prospect (though unranked) 2B Arturo Carreno broke his elbow with two games left to the Alley Cats’ season. The 20-year-old is not expected to be back for the 2041 opener. How that affects his prospects of getting ranked next year has yet to be determined. The Critters signed Carreno for $60k out of the Dominican Republic in July 2036.

The Alley Cats became entirely tethered at the end, finishing the season with precisely nine living position players. 1B Jason Robinson and OF Van Anderson went down in the season finale to whittle them down to that. The team itself, largely plundered to keep the big-league team spinning for most of the season, finished 64-78 and 19 games out. The Ham Lake Panthers went under, 50-90, in AA. The Beagles were yet the least-worst of the bunch, 65-75, 13 1/2 games out.

Fun Fact: The Sulkey and Stice no-hitters are the closest-together no-hitters have been tossed since 2024.

Back then the Loggers’ Jorge Villalobos no-hit the Indians on September 6, followed two days later by the Caps’ Eric Williams’ perfect game against the Rebs.

Adding on Joe Feltman’s no-hitter on June 30 of this year, and the three no-hitters spun last year by Willie Gallardo, Sal Chavez, and Ben Lipsky, this is the first time consecutive seasons have each seen 3+ no-hitters pitched in league history. The only other pair of seasons with a total of six no-hitters between them were 2017 and 2018, with two in the former and four in the latter. Brian Furst chipped in one no-no in each of them, the rest being covered by Jaylen “Midnight” Martin, Michael Foreman, Andrew Gudeman, and John Key.

The Raccoons were not involved in any of these no-hitters in any form, although Jonny Toner would no-hit the Thunder on April 23, 2019, making it seven no-hitters in a 730-day span, the first time in the league that happened.

We are living in those wonderful times (7 no-hitters within 730 days) again and will continue to do so until September 28, when Brian Frain’s 2038 no-no will “expire”.

Seven no-hitters were also packed into the July 15, 2029 – June 15, 2031 stretch. Tom Shumway made a Raccoons contribution back then, the most-recent Raccoons no-hitter on record.

+++

I am not fond of Chris Lancaster. I’m a Yorkist.

My puns are getting worse and worse.

[Westheim]

(alternatively takes oxygen from a tank and breathes into a paper bag)

Okay, everybody calm down! We have – (shattering noises from the side) … Chad, please! … Maud called in ill today, and we are mostly on our ow- (tumbling noises from the side) … Chad, can you please just sit down?? … Obviously not.

(Chad tumbles by the desk, wearing the mascot costume except for the head, which has gone missing; instead he has a lamp screen stuck over his head)

Things are so far still fairly calm, I think.

(Hoogey gallops by, screaming bitterly with a fork stuck in his left front paw)

Ah, here is Steve from Accounting bringing the cookies. – Steve, that’s not cookies. That’s tuna on white bread. – Steve, you’re doing it wrong.

(Steve from Accounting sits down on the chair in front of the desk, upon which the floor breaks open and sends him plummeting into the room below)

All is well. (dons the oxygen mask again)

Raccoons (76-74) vs. Thunder (86-63) – September 17-19, 2040

With the season series even, the Thunder tried to keep their hold on the CL South. They were only one game ahead of the Knights, so there was no room for stumbles. Thankfully the Raccoons were ready to roll over – maybe literally.

Projected matchups:
Bernie Chavez (6-10, 4.44 ERA) vs. Juan Ramos (12-9, 3.23 ERA)
Ian Wilson (4-4, 3.15 ERA) vs. Casey Pinter (14-10, 3.73 ERA)
Nelson Moreno (5-6, 3.37 ERA) vs. Alan Fleming (13-8, 4.34 ERA)

Two right-handers sandwiching a southpaw here. We’ll see how deep we can make it into the series before everything caves in here.

Game 1
OCT: CF C. Vega – 2B Martell – C Adames – RF Marz – LF E. Moore – SS Kuhn – 1B M. Vasquez – 3B Nieblas – P J. Ramos
POR: 3B A. Ramos – 2B Trevino – CF Maldonado – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – 1B Anderson – SS Kilgallen – P Chavez

Things got marginally better as soon as the actual baseball stuff started, except for Cosmo Trevino not finding uniform pants in his place in the clubhouse and having to take his first at-bat in his boxershorts adorned with little red hearts. He grounded out. Kilgallen was drilled with two outs in the bottom 2nd, angrily stole a base and was singled home by Bernie for the first run of the game, while Bernie put up three scoreless for two hits early on. Tony Morales brought home another 2-out run in the third inning, singling in Manny Fernandez. We will just not go into the details how Maldonado was thrown out at third base on an attempted double steal before that play, and Berto hit a sac fly with Anderson and Bernie (!) on the corners and one down in the fourth, 3-0. Cosmo drew a walk, but Maldonado struck out, ending the inning. It was right around that time that I suddenly felt intestinal discomfort. (bends over the desk and hollers into the hole Steve from Accounting disappeared in) Where did you find that tuna?? – In *which* dusty closet??

Worse yet, Maldonado tore out a hamstring racing after a Jimmy Kuhn drive in the fifth inning, which would turn out to end his season. Hoogey replaced him, still with a fork in the paw, and another one in his right ear, while Bernie Chavez gave up a run on a 2-out Orlando Nieblas single and then a loud double into the corner by Jon Ramos. Carlos Vega grounded out to end the inning, keeping it 3-1.

It was still 3-1 to begin the eighth inning, which was when I came back from a silent place after getting an ugly divorce from the tuna. When I came back into the office, I caught Cristiano Carmona sitting behind my GM desk, and when I chased him around that desk he accidentally rolled into the hole that Steve from Accounting had already disappeared in. At least Bernie made it through the eighth inning despite a bloop single by Nieblas. Zabala got the ball for the ninth inning against the meat of the order, with Jesus Adames flying out to Hoogey, who still had one unpierced body part to catch the ball with. John Marz popped out to Balaski in shallow right. Ethan Moore ripped a 2-2 single, but Adam Dubas struck out to end the game. 3-1 Coons. Maldonado 2-3; Anderson 1-2, BB; Chavez 8.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 4 K, W (7-10) and 2-2, RBI;

Maldonado was indeed out for the season with a strained hammy and was sent back to the DL. At least Dr. Padilla he was pretty sure that it was only a strain – he had to make the diagnosis by the light of a flickering candle because as soon as the game was over, the power in the entire ballpark went out.

The Raccoons brought up another player to make up for the Maldonado injury, promoting 24-year-old switch-hitting LF/CF Jordan Gonzalez, our sixth-round pick in 2034. He had been in Ham Lake from 2035 through 2040, hitting precisely nothing. Depletion in AAA meant he got promoted to the Alley Cats anyway, hitting .272/.356/.369 with three homers in 79 games. Gonzalez arrived in Portland just as the we managed to stomp most of the plus-sized cockroaches that had broken out of the walls overnight.

Game 2
OCT: CF C. Vega – 3B McWhirter – C Adames – RF Marz – 1B D. Cruz – 2B Martell – SS Nieblas – LF M. Vasquez – P Pinter
POR: 3B Ramos – SS Kilgallen – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – 1B Salazar – 2B Lando – CF Gonzalez – P Wilson

Bottom 2nd, Dr. Padilla came in and asked me whether the fennel tea also tasted funny to us, then rolled his eyes upwards and slumped into a corner. Since neither me nor Slappy had anything to do with Maud’s fennel tea, we could not advise him as to that, or revive him since neither of us had any experience in first aid. As an aside, the Raccoons got Kilmer on with a walk, Balaski with a single, and Lando with a Bill McWhirter error and one out, bringing up the debutee Jordan Gonzalez, who ripped an 0-2 pitch to left for a 2-run single, as did Ian Wilson on a 1-0 pitch by Pinter, running the score to 4-0, and we also found our scout guy, who patted Dr. Padilla’s cheek until he opened his eyes again. Berto and Kilgallen reached to load the bases, and Manny hit a sac fly for the final run in the 5-run inning before Kilmer flew out to John Marz.

The Raccoons stopped hitting right away after that, although it was hard to remain concentrated at the plate with all the doves darting straight for the batters’ eyes for the next few innings. I don’t think it helped that I tried to shoot them down with the blunderbuss. I mean, I hit one of the beasts, but it plunged right into the ice cream bowl of a fat lady, who shrieked loud enough to be heard in Vancouver. The irritation all this havoc caused to the batters helped Wilson, without a doubt, who held the Thunder to four hits against six strikeouts through six innings, and no runs. Nieblas hit a 2-out single in the seventh, but the other three batters Wilson faced all grounded out. Wilson was toast after eight, though – stamina was a real issue for him, and he was exhausted after 95 pitches. Even another run scored by the Raccoons on a Kilmer sac fly in the bottom 8th couldn’t keep him in the game – he was finished. Nelson Fonseca got the ball for the ninth, facing the meat of the order just as news spread that the ballpark’s sewers had been overwhelmed and the fans in the bottom deck should better evacuate now. Thankfully Fonseca retired Oklahoma before the seepage could make its way onto the field. 6-0 Coons. Wilson 8.0 IP, 5 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 7 K and 1-3, 2 RBI;

None of the Critters had more than one base hit in the game. Also, has anyone seen Damian Salazar? Did he make it to the clubhouse or was he washed away by the brown flood?

When I arrived at the ballpark on Wednesday, it somehow smelled of smoke, but before I could investigate that I had to free Nick Lando from a dumpster near the rear parking lot. The heavy metal lid had come down just as he had tried to climb back out and had pinned him, but Dr. Padilla ensured us that he only had mild contusions all over his body.

Game 3
OCT: CF C. Vega – 2B Martell – C Adames – 1B D. Cruz – RF Marz – LF E. Moore – SS Kuhn – 3B Nieblas – P Fleming
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – CF Hooge – 1B Anderson – SS Kilgallen – P Moreno

For mild catastrophies, Danny Cruz doubled home Al Martell off Nels in the first inning, and the catering had mixed up the order and had sent broccoli and eggplant for dinner rather than our customary 250 pounds of beefsteaks. Cosmo and Manny, despite being robbed of all energy by malnutrition, still made it to the corners in the bottom of the first inning, but Kilmer popped out. The following Critters were so starved they could barely hold the stick. Fleming walked both Balaski and Hooge, though, forcing in the tying run. Anderson at 1-2 dropped a dying quail between Martell and Carlos Vega for a 2-run single, but Kilgallen grounded out. Thankfully somebody got the boys a few hot dog from the vendors between innings, and by the third inning Hooge whacked a 2-run homer to take a 5-1 lead, and Anderson made it back-to-back with a solo deed to right, 6-1. That didn’t prevent a runaway AI-controlled city bus from bursting through the shrubbery that served as batter’s eye in centerfield and through the centerfield fence in the fourth inning. It rolled around the warning track in anti-clockwise fashion, stopped at the Raccoons’ dugout, and when nobody got on or off the bus, drove back around to centerfield and left through the hole in the fence, with Hoogey curiously looking after it.

While something definitely smelled of smoke in here, at least Nels was going well. He allowed only one hit between the Cruz double in the first inning and an unfortunate Adames homer in the seventh. Kilmer countered with a solo shot of his own making in the bottom 7th, and on an 0-2 pitch by Tim Steinbach. Jimmy Kuhn reached on a Berto error in the eighth inning, but was picked off by Moreno, and other than Wilson the day before, Moreno on 92 pitches was nowhere near done – he came back out for the ninth inning, facing the top of the order. Unfortunately that was when he got actually under the wheels, with Carlos Vega and Al Martell reaching on soft singles before Adames drew a walk. All the runners would score against the bullpen; two on groundouts given up by Alex Ramirez, and one more on a Chuck Jones-induced grounder that Jose Brito filed away for an error. Somehow, the game ended before it became a complete farce, and before the ballpark burned down altogether, because I *definitely* smelled smoke…! 7-5 Critters. Trevino 3-4; Kilmer 2-4, HR, RBI; Anderson 3-4, HR, 3 RBI;

So Moreno was back even in terms of record, but his ERA went up to 3.44 on five runs (four earned). How that would reflect in Rookie of the Year voting… (shrugs)

I only know that it’s pitch black now as far as a good draft pick is concerned……

But there were some good news, too – Maud came back on Thursday, still a little bit red around the nose, but that didn’t stop me from giving her a smooch on the cheek! – Hey, everybody, Maud is back! – Maud, can you make this place whole again? – Good! – Also, do you smell smoke?

Raccoons (79-74) vs. Crusaders (72-80) – September 21-23, 2040

Final home series of the season – good thing the ballpark didn’t burn down before we could complete our loss of the season series to the Crusaders. They led the things, 9-6, and the best we could still achieve was a tie, which would also give us a winning record for this rotten season, which sounded weird, to be honest. They were tenth in runs scored, sixth in runs allowed, and probably locked into fifth place for the year. Maybe. Who knows. At least I don’t smell smoke again.

Projected matchups:
Raffaello Sabre (14-8, 3.17 ERA) vs. Josh Brown (12-8, 3.90 ERA)
Sal Lozano (2-5, 4.65 ERA) vs. Todd Lush (11-10, 3.81 ERA)
Bernie Chavez (7-10, 4.26 ERA) vs. Dave Hils (1-6, 5.28 ERA)

That would be two left-handers followed by a right-hander on Sunday. Since we had both been off on Thursday, they could easily make other arrangements though.

…or the weather made other arrangements. Friday saw terrible weather, rain all day, and no baseball. We got a double header rescheduled for Saturday. When Saturday rolled around, the Crusaders suddenly led off with Dave Hils.

Game 1
NYC: SS Adame – 1B Rudd – 2B Briones – CF Besaw – 3B Sifuentes – C D. Phillips – RF Platero – LF L. Herrera – P Hils
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – CF Hooge – 1B Anderson – SS Kilgallen – P Sabre

The weather was still meh on Saturday, but Sabre retired eight in a row to begin the first game. Then Hils singled. Then it began to rain. Before long, there was a 25-minute delay, but also a Manny Fernandez RBI double, plating Cosmo in the bottom 3rd for the first run of the game. Hoogey then hit a leadoff triple in the bottom of the fourth inning before Anderson and Kilgallen made highly annoying outs that didn’t get him across. Sabre helped out, singling to center for a 2-0 lead. That was about it for offensive exploits by the Raccoons for the time being, while Sabre kept clicking off batters not named Dave Hils. Nor did he strike somebody out – it was just poor contact upon poor contact upon more poor contact. Through seven, Sabre had neither a K, nor a hit allowed to a position player. His spot also led off the bottom 7th, but he wasn’t hit for. Time to go for the shutout, Raffaello! He opened the inning with a single to right, then was doubled up by Berto. Cosmo singled, advanced on a wild pitch, and scored on Manny’s single. Kilmer was retired at the fence by Jose Platero to end the inning. Then the Crusaders chewed up Sabre with Ramon Sifuentes and Lorenzo Herrera doubles, and Hils (!) hit another bloop single to score Herrera with two outs. Sabre was yanked, while Chuck Jones at least struck out PH Rich Salek to get out of the damn inning. Bottom 8th, Ed Hooge doubled, and was sent around third base when Kilgallen hit a 2-out single to center. Joe Besaw threw him out at home plate. At least Lindstrom retired New York in order to keep Sabre’s W in one piece… 3-2 Critters. Fernandez 2-3, BB, 2B, 2 RBI; Hooge 2-4, 3B, 2B; Sabre 7.2 IP, 4 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 0 BB, 0 K, W (15-8) and 2-3, RBI;

Game 2
NYC: SS Adame – LF L. Herrera – 2B Briones – 3B Sifuentes – CF Besaw – 1B Rudd – C J. Herrera – RF Melendez – P J. Brown
POR: SS Brito – 3B Trevino – LF Fernandez – RF Balaski – 1B Salazar – 2B Lando – CF Gonzalez – C Lancaster – P Lozano

A Lorenzo Herrera single, an error by Brito, pressed into service at shortstop for a lack of other options at this point, and a 3-piece by Sifuentes got the New Yorkers going early against Sal Lozano in the second part of the day’s allotment of baseball. Sifuentes would walk his next time up in the third inning, advanced on a wild pitch, then scored on a Besaw single, 4-0. That was pretty much all the offense in the early going, with the Raccoons amounting to one (1) base hit through five innings.

Lozano looked like he’d at least make it six innings and get out with some scuff marks. Yes, Tom Rudd and Bill Melendez reached base in the sixth, but he faced Josh Brown with two outs and Brown was even a left-handed hitter, so – … Brown then whacked an 0-2 pitch into the leftfield corner for a 2-run double, which made him indeed Lozano’s final batter in a 6-run shakedown. While the Raccoons then got out of the inning with Zabala and two scoreless from Pena, their lone Bill Balaski single stood alone into the eighth inning until joined by a pinch-hit single by *Jay de Wit* in the H column. Of course nothing came of that knock, either. The Raccoons then put Jermaine Campbell in for the ninth, where he logged two outs before calling for Dr. Padilla and left the game. Ryan van Campenhout got the final Crusaders out instead. Jeremy Bloedow retired Manny, Balaski, and Morales in order to finish a Crusaders’ combined 2-hitter. 6-0 Crusaders. De Wit (PH) 1-1; Pena 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 2 K;

Jermaine Campbell (3-0, 3.46 ERA, 3 SV) unwittingly suited up for Portland the final time on this Saturday. A shoulder strain meant that he was out for the season and would finish his Raccoons days on the DL before getting his team option for ’41 nixed.

Game 3
NYC: SS Adame – RF Melendez – 2B Briones – CF Besaw – 3B Sifuentes – C D. Phillips – 1B Stedham – LF L. Herrera – P Lush
POR: SS Brito – 3B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – 2B Lando – 1B Salazar – CF de Wit – P Chavez

Bernie showed ill command, walking two and running quite a few long counts in the early innings, but didn’t allow a run. He also drew a leadoff walk off Lush that soon blossomed into bases loaded with one down in the bottom 3rd, with Cosmo also walking and Manny hitting a soft single to left. Kilmer’s sac fly to center was all the Coons got for a 1-0 lead, with Balaski grounding out to second base rather poorly. Kilmer’s RBI was the only run through five, with neither team getting the ball to fall in when they needed it. The Crusaders got Lorenzo Herrera to third base in the top 5th, but left him there. Bernie retired three in a row in the sixth, and Balaski and Salazar hit a pair of singles to go to the corners in the bottom of that inning. Next up was Jay de Wit, and if we actually played for something, we’d bat for him, but … eh! De Wit promptly sunk a gapper for an RBI double, 2-0. Bernie tacked on a run with a sac fly, while Brito struck out.

Bernie didn’t go past seven, which to complete already required him to throw 104 pitches, but he held the Crusaders to three hits and shut out. Ramirez retired New York in order in the eighth, while Zabala got the ninth. Mario Briones popped out to Lando. Besaw grounded out to Cosmo. Sifuentes singled. Devin Phillips walked. The runners advanced on a wild pitch – but the Crusaders forgot to do something about Jesse Stedham, next in line, who, as we could vouch for, was as unclutch as they come. He grounded out to Salazar, concluding the series. 3-0 Raccoons. Salazar 3-4; de Wit 2-4, 2B, RBI; Chavez 7.0 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 5 K, W (8-10) and 0-1, BB, RBI;

In other news

September 17 – Falcons and Indians scatter a combined 22 hits so perfectly in a regulation game that Indy barely wins, 2-1. The teams strand a combined 23 runners in 8 1/2 innings.
September 19 – The Scorpions are forcefully made to walk off by the Capitals in the ninth inning on not one, but two errors by 1B/3B Vince Lutch (.314, 5 HR, 19 RBI), a grounder, and a walkoff balk by Dusty Kulp (5-3, 4.43 ERA, 3 SV), giving Sacramento a 6-5 win.
September 21 – LAP 2B/SS Jose Cruz (.290, 8 HR, 49 RBI) has 6 RBI in a 17-6 rout of the Gold Sox.
September 22 – VAN OF Jerry Outram (.338, 21 HR, 93 RBI) is out with a strained hip flexor, but the Canadiens claim he will be ready for the CLCS. The injury paradoxically assures him the CL batting title.
September 23 – The Canadiens rout the Loggers, 10-0, behind a 1-hitter by SP Mike Mihalik (19-5, 3.24 ERA). Pinch-hitting, MIL OF/1B Tim Cannizzard (.288, 4 HR, 38 RBI) drops in a single to stave off the no-hit threat in the sixth inning.

FL Player of the Week: DEN 1B Mark Cahill (.294, 13 HR, 60 RBI), hitting .440 (11-25) with 1 HR, 7 RBI
CL Player of the Week: LVA SS/2B Chris O’Keefe (.230, 10 HR, 70 RBI), batting .423 (11-26) with 4 RBI

Complaints and stuff

What did we learn this week? First, Maud is irreplaceable. Second, the Raccoons have no sense for situational losing, as I like to call it.

Sabre wants a new contract. He’s serious. He’s actually begging. He *made me a sandwich* every day this week. Some of them I even ate, but the one on Tuesday was crawling with roaches. The conditions for an extension are the same as before, though – if he is compensation eligible, he’s gone, as much as we may like him, and as much as he may be begging. (looks down) Please let go of my leg, Raffaello. Please. – (shakes his leg with the Critter clung to it)

The ex-Coons featured strong in that walkoff in the Cali state capital on the 19th.

Fun Fact: In ABL history, two no-hitters have been pitched on September 23, both in the 1990s.

LAP Angel Romero no-hit the Warriors in 1994, with the Pacifics squeezing out just enough offense for a 1-0 win. In 1997 Henry Selph pitched his first no-hitter, also in a 1-0 win over the Knights.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (81-75) @ Canadiens (101-55) – September 24-26, 2040

Spoiler alert: this series had not worked out for us in 2040. Of 15 games played, the Raccoons had won a whole pair, and it’s not like the damn Elks had won the North on our broken spines alone, but we had surely had a paw in them winning the division with a million innings to spare. They remained first in offense and first in pitching, and only a cruel joke by the perpetually untrustworthy baseball gods would stop them from getting that fourth set of rings this time.

Projected matchups:
Nelson Moreno (6-6, 3.44 ERA) vs. David Arias (15-8, 4.02 ERA)
Ian Wilson (5-4, 2.90 ERA) vs. Alexander Lewis (6-5, 2.79 ERA)
Angelo Montano (4-8, 6.11 ERA) vs. Matt Sealock (22-5, 2.45 ERA)

Saturday’s double-header prevented Sabre from going on Wednesday. Meanwhile, the damn Elks carted up two right-handers surrounding a left-hander.

Game 1
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Morales – CF Hooge – RF Balaski – SS Kilgallen – 1B Salazar – P Moreno
VAN: CF Foss – 1B J. Lopez – 2B Schneller – 3B Sprague – RF R. Phillips – C D. James – LF V. Vazquez – SS Cabral – P D. Arias

The damn Elks began by tearing my precious pitching prospect right in half, with Aaron Foss opening with a single that the defensive nightmare Balaski overran for his seventh error of the year. Johnny Lopez hit another single and one run scored on Dan Schneller’s double play grounder, but Glenn Sprague reached anyway and Ryan Phillips hit a bomb to right to put them up 3-0 right away. Moreno continued to get crowded with two more runners in the second inning, then was hit by an Arias pitch to begin the top 3rd. Somehow the Raccoons filled the bags with Cosmo and Morales reaching on a walk and single, respectively, but with two outs Ed Hooge grounded at Schneller … who flubbed the ball for an error, and Nels scored. Then Balaski hit the worst fly out ever to Victor Vazquez, stranding a full for good.

Schneller would leave the game in the fifth inning after being bowled over by Cosmo in breaking up a double play attempt on Manny Fernandez’ grounder. Manny Mongome replaced the second baseman, and the damn Elks, who had already lost Jerry Outram to injury, were not amused. (hugs Honeypaws a little tighter) We should just take out every player we truly love, right? The inning itself led nowhere despite a 2-out single by Hooge, with Balaski hitting another pathetic fly to Vazquez. Moreno lasted six innings, but not without getting another run shoved onto his ledger when a Sprague double to left conincided with Derek James singling with two outs in the bottom 6th. The Raccoons had just as many answers down 4-1 as they had had down 3-1, and that was before Mauricio Garavito and Alex Ramirez were singled to death for three runs in the eighth inning. 7-1 Canadiens. Trevino 4-5; Brito (PH) 1-1; Gonzalez (PH) 1-1;

Jon Caskey’s knee contusion consistently refused to get any better, and the Raccoons pulled the plug on his season after another setback was reported by Dr. Padilla on Tuesday and dumped him onto the DL. He would technically be eligible to be activated as soon as Saturday, since he had last appeared in a game on the 14th.

Game 2
POR: SS Brito – 3B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – 1B Salazar – 2B Lando – CF Gonzalez – P Wilson
VAN: CF Foss – 1B J. Lopez – 2B Sibley – 3B Sprague – C Clemente – LF DeVita – RF V. Vazquez – SS Cabral – P A. Lewis

Wilson did even worse than Moreno on Tuesday, conceding a run on two singles and two walks even before Marc DeVita raked a bases-clearing triple to put the game into the books, 4-0. Neither Victor Vazquez nor Ramon Cabral managed to bring in DeVita from third base, which was such a relief… The Raccoons didn’t even get a hit the first time through; but Manny Fernandez hit a solo homer in the fourth inning to at least get them on the board. Hooray.

I called Slappy to inquire the phone number of One-Eyed Jack, to see whether he had some of his special booze on stash. Turned out, he had, and the boss delivered in person by the fifth inning, a crate of six bottles, each of which looking different thanks to being repurposed from something else entirely, and one of them looked really mucky brown inside, but then again, One-Eyed Jack’s was so high-volume that it probably killed everything that would otherwise kill the drinker. Since Jack, who wore a rainbow-colored eye patch and was tattooed all over, had nothing else to do, he watched the rest of the game with me and Honeypaws at home. He would not drink his own booze, saying that it was for mere mortals. Instead he licked a crystal of unknown provenance and then zoomed out, not saying anything from the sixth through the eighth innings.

All of that was long after Wilson’s demise, squeezed out in the fifth inning of a 4-2 game. The Raccoons had scratched out a run in the top 5th on a Lando single, a groundout, Lando stealing third base, and then Brito legging out an infield roller with two outs. The damn Elks clawed that run back off David Lindstrom, with Vazquez hitting a leadoff double in the sixth and not being contained on base by Chuck Jones. Elk City tacked on two more runs in the seventh on four straight 2-out singles off Pena, one of which was overrun by Balaski (…!) to put the game into no-doubt territory. Although, to be fair, the Raccoons hadn’t looked like rally material even before that late onslaught against generally overwhelmed AAA pitching… Lewis went the distance on nothing more than a 4-hitter. 7-2 Canadiens. Brito 1-2, BB, RBI;

What do you mean, One-Eyed Jack, “what happened”? The Raccoons lost. – Why did you put down a fiver on the Coons against the *Elks*??

Oh never mind. (takes another voluminous sip from the brown-stained bottle)

That bottle looked almost as bad as Jon Caskey’s knee, as I saw from pictures Dr. Padilla sent me from the Arctic Circle. Like One-Eyed Jack’s eye patch, it was all the colors of the rainbow.

Game 3
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Morales – CF Hooge – RF Balaski – 1B Anderson – SS Kilgallen – P Montano
VAN: CF Foss – 1B J. Lopez – 2B Sibley – C Clemente – RF R. Phillips – LF DeVita – 3B R. Ashley – SS Cabral – P Sealock

Starting Montano in Elk City amounted to intense animal cruelty, but I kept blaming the rainout on Friday – otherwise Sabre would have been in this game and Montano would have been left to rot in the pen. Instead he’d get to rot out in the open, although miraculously the damn Elks couldn’t score off him in the early innings. They had a walk and a single in each of the first two frames, didn’t score anybody, and were sat down in order in the third. The Critters scattered four hits for no gains in the first three innings, keeping the game scoreless.

The fourth began with Ed Hooge singling to right and stealing second base. Balaski singled, putting them on the corners, which almost looked like a scoring opportunity. And they did actually score… on Oliver Anderson’s 4-6-3 double play grounder. Kilgallen then singled with two outs, as did Montano, and they reached the corners for Berto, who lined out to DeVita in left… Four singles, one run in the inning, and eight hits for one run in the game! The Elks had 2-out singles from DeVita and Ray Ashley in the inning, but left them on the corners when Ramon Cabral grounded out to Anderson. Top 5th, Cosmo and Morales hit singles and Ryan Phillips threw away the ball on the latter so thoroughly that Cosmo scored from first base on a single and error. Morales was stranded in a 2-0 game.

And the Elks? No discernible rally reaction as of the sixth inning. The Raccoons knocked out Sealock after 12 hits in 6.2 innings, while Montano faced the bottom of the order in the 2-0 game in the seventh, entering on 88 pitches. This was likely his last inning anyway. He nailed Ashley with a 1-2 pitch. The runner advanced on grounders by Cabral and Mongome. The opportunity to bring a left-hander was there for both of those batters as well as for Foss, but why not see how far you can bend Angelo Montano before he snaps in a meaningless game (even for the Elks, who had the top seed locked up by quite the margin)? Foss ran a 2-1 count, then popped out, completing *seven scoreless* for Montano in Elk City. Neither me nor Honeypaws could believe it. As soon as the pen got involved, though… Timóteo Clemente took Brent Clark deep in the eighth, cutting the lead in half. The Raccoons didn’t tack on against Tim Zimmerman, giving the lead to Alex Ramirez without a cushion in the bottom of the ninth. He promptly walked DeVita leading off, who was run for by Alex Perez. Ashley grounded out, Cabral walked. Glenn Sprague pinch-hit with one out and popped out to Brito at second base, which brought back Foss. The Raccoons made another move and brought in Chuck Jones for the lefty batter. The damn Elks countered with right-handed bat carrier Derek James. Jones got the K anyway. 2-1 Critters. Ramos 2-5; Fernandez 2-5, 2B; Balaski 2-4; Anderson 2-4; Montano 7.0 IP, 5 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 4 K, W (5-8) and 1-3;

Angelo ******* Montano!!

Raccoons (82-77) @ Titans (85-74) – September 28-30, 2040

The Titans had lost five in a row, but it wasn’t like that had killed their playoff ambitions, either. They were fifth in runs scored and fourth in runs allowed with a run differential about one fifth of the damn Elks’. The season series stood 8-7 in favor of Boston.

Projected matchups:
Raffaello Sabre (15-8, 3.14 ERA) vs. Blake Sciulli (4-7, 4.85 ERA)
Bernie Chavez (8-10, 4.06 ERA) vs. Javy Santana (12-12, 4.22 ERA)
Nelson Moreno (6-7, 3.55 ERA) vs. Seth Green (4-3, 4.12 ERA)

Three right-handers coming up, it seems.

Game 1
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Brito – RF Fernandez – C Morales – CF Hooge – 1B Salazar – LF de Wit – SS Kilgallen – P Sabre
BOS: 3B Rangel – RF J. Davis – CF Vermillion – 1B A. Zacarias – LF W. Vega – C Duryea – SS Bunyon – 2B Toney – P Sciulli

A Ramos Special involving a walk, a stolen base, and a Brito single put the Raccoons up 1-0 in the first inning, while Sabre seemed to be doing alright until Sciulli hit a leadoff double in the bottom 3rd and Kilgallen dropped a pop by Ruben Rangel to put runners on the corners. John Davis tied the game with a single to center, Sabre hit Mark Vermillion, and Alex Zacarias and Willie Vega both hit singles. Down 3-1, Michael Duryea’s comebacker was taken for an out at home plate, the first out of the ******* inning. Donovan Bunyon popped out and Mike Toney grounded out to Berto to end the inning…

Sabre was chewed up in just five innings, while the Raccoons looked overeaten and didn’t get anything moving, landing only one base hit in addition to the Brito RBI single through five innings. Berto and Morales found singles off Sciulli in the sixth, which was enough to score a run and narrow the gap to 3-2, but the Titans got the run right back off certified waste of oxygen, Francisco Pena in the bottom of the inning. He walked Toney to get going, threw a wild pitch, then conceded the run on a 2-out RBI single by Davis. But it was late for everybody – Gold Glover Willie Vega had an easy fly by Berto come right at him and dropped it in the seventh. The play should have stranded Kilgallen and Anderson on the corners, but instead became a run and a 2-base error, and then three runs and a Coons lead once Brito slapped a single through the hole on the left side to score Anderson and Ramos. That 5-4 lead then somehow survived a parade of Fonseca, Garavito, and Lindstrom and three Titans runners in the next two innings. The Coons offense failed to tack on and Lindstrom was left in for the ninth inning. Zacarias struck out. Vega flew out to Jordan Gonzalez in center while it started to rain. Duryea fanned. 5-4 Coons. Ramos 2-3, BB; Trevino (PH) 1-1; Brito 2-5, 3 RBI; Morales 2-3, BB, RBI; Anderson (PH) 1-1;

John Davis was 5-for-5 for the Titans, which was more than half the Raccoons’ output on hits. And Boston still lost.

Game 2
POR: SS Kilgallen – 3B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Morales – RF Balaski – 1B Anderson – 2B Lando – CF Gonzalez – P Chavez
BOS: 3B Rangel – RF J. Davis – CF Vermillion – 1B A. Zacarias – LF W. Vega – C Duryea – SS Santillan – 2B Toney – P J. Santana

Bernie still had a chance for an ERA under four, but sure liked to play with fire, conceding three singles in the second inning. Zacarias, Vega, and Toney were all stranded though, with the three other batters in the inning all striking out. Bernie reached 3.99 when Rangel lined out to Kilgallen to begin the bottom 3rd, and the game remained scoreless through three. Balaski hit a double in the second, Anderson hit a double in the fourth, and that was about it for actual threats from the Portland team so far. When Jordan Gonzalez socked a home run to right leading off the fifth inning it came as quite the surprise indeed. It was obviously the young Gonzalez’ first major-league home run. Kilgallen hit a 1-out triple in the same inning, coming around on Cosmo’s groundout to run the score to 2-0. Boston countered with Jose Santillan landing a leadoff single, followed by Toney walking in the bottom 5th. Santana bunted them over, but crucially, Rangel struck out. Davis was then out to Balaski to strand the tying runs in scoring position. Bernie completed seven shutout innings with as many strikeouts, but that took 103 pitches and he would not return for the eighth – at least he had gotten that ERA into the threes! Clark and Zabala held the Titans away in the eighth, and Anderson and Lando dropped singles against Santana in the ninth inning. Gonzalez hit a run-scoring groundout to knock him out, while Ed Hooge raked a pinch-hit RBI triple off Santana’s replacement, Mike Hugh. Kilgallen struck out before the Raccoons provoked the baseball gods by inserting Ryan van Campenhout into a 4-0 game. He walked Vega and allowed a single to Duryea before consecutive Titans hit grounders to third base that kept the runners in scoring position. Matt Dear pinch-hit in the pitcher’s spot, and after the pitching coach ventured out to lie to van Campenhout about being confident in him, the hopeless right-hander balked in one run and conceded the other on a single. Chuck Jones replaced him, walked the bags full, and then somehow got a grounder from Vermillion to Lando to bail out. 4-2 Blighters. Balaski 2-4, 2B; Lando 2-4; Gonzalez 2-4, HR, 2 RBI; Hooge (PH) 1-1, 3B, RBI; Chavez 7.0 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 7 K, W (9-10) and 1-2;

Our mighty pen offered two hits and four walks (one by Clark) in two innings.

Thankfully, only one more game remains…

Although it was a bit of a drag. Sunday brought terrible weather, leading to a postponement and a makeup arrangement on Monday. Since the game had ranking implications, the league insisted on it being played. Regardless of result, the Raccoons would wind up in a tie in the North, either for second place with the Titans, or for third place with the Loggers.

The Loggers!

Game 3
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – LF Fernandez – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – SS Kilgallen – CF Gonzalez – 1B Salazar – P Moreno
BOS: SS Gil – RF J. Davis – CF Vermillion – 1B A. Zacarias – LF W. Vega – C Duryea – 3B Rangel – 2B Santillan – P S. Green

Portland went up 1-0 in the first with Berto and Cosmo reaching base before Manny and Kilmer hit into a pair of force plays at second base that allowed Berto to circle around. The game fell apart though for Moreno as early as the second inning. The Titans tied it up on a Vega double and Rangel single, but Moreno then also walked Jose Santillan and Berto fell onto Seth Green’s 2-out grounder without playing it. Antonio Gil’s single and a bases-loaded walk to David both brought in a run for a 3-1 deficit, although only one run was earned. Portland returned with leadoff hits by Cosmo and Manny in the third, plus Matt Kilgallen’s 2-out, 3-run blast to left, putting the Critters back on top, 4-3, but Moreno couldn’t hold on to that either, and the game became tied at four after a Gil single and a Vermillion double.

It remained like that through six, with Nels at least not taking another loss. Salazar and pinch-hitting Ed Hooge made quick outs to begin the seventh but Berto and Cosmo stumbled on base with two outs, which already involved a Santillan error. Manny grounded out to Gil, though, and that ended Moreno’s hopes to finish at .500 for the year. The tie was broken on a Ruben Rangel home run off Nelson Fonseca in the eighth inning. With Duryea on base it counted for two, and the Raccoons had the bottom of the pack up for the ninth inning against Gilberto Castillo. Jordan Gonzalez struck out. Damian Salazar lined out to Rangel. Nick Lando popped out to Zacarias to finish the season. 6-4 Titans. Ramos 2-4; Trevino 1-2, 2 BB; Gonzalez 2-4;

In other news

September 24 – RIC RF/CF Joe Ritchey (.267, 31 HR, 92 RBI) is out for the season with a broken thumb. Ritchey starves in third place in the Federal League home run race behind NAS Sean Ashley and CIN Jamie King.
September 25 – The Buffaloes and Rebels play 17 innings, nearly six hours, and use *61* players before Topeka eeks out a 6-4 win. The game was actually scoreless for *15* innings before both teams scored two runs in the 16th. The Buffos broke out for four in the top 17th before barely holding on.
September 26 – The Aces’ 1B/LF/RF/SS John Byrd (.266, 2 HR, 19 RBI) is only a part-time player and spent most of the year in AAA, but still breaks out by hitting for the cycle in a 5-3 win over the Falcons. Byrd goes 4-for-4 and drives in two runs in the victory. It is the second cycle of the year and the 94th in league history.
September 26 – Dallas RF/LF Sean Calais (.370, 7 HR, 34 RBI) has a 20-game hitting streak with a single in a 7-3 loss to the Warriors.
September 26 – TOP 1B Chris Delagrange (.240, 19 HR, 95 RBI) could miss the rest of the season with a knee contusion, including the playoffs.

September 27 – The FLCS gets set on the same day entirely, with the Buffaloes beating the Rebs, 11-2, to win the FL East, while the West is won by the Wolves with a 3-1 win over the Gold Sox.
September 27 – The 20-game hitting streak of DAL Sean Calais (.366, 7 HR, 34 RBI) ends abruptly with an 0-for-4 in a 4-3 loss to the Warriors.

September 28 – The Knights win the CL South with a 3-2 squeezer against the Thunder.
September 28 – The Canadiens will be in the playoffs without 2B Dan Schneller (.298, 29 HR, 97 RBI) who is out for the year with a strained hamstring.
September 28 – SFW SP Tony Galligher (9-11, 4.43 ERA) is scratched from his final start of the season with a bad case of shoulder inflammation and is questionable for the start of the 2041 season.
September 28 – TIJ RF/LF/1B Bryce Toohey (.369, 3 HR, 15 RBI) has three doubles and two singles with two RBI in a 12-6 win over the Falcons.
September 29 – New York’s Rich Salek (.257, 4 HR, 17 RBI) hits a 3-run walkoff home run to beat the Canadiens, 3-0 in the 10th inning. The game had been scoreless throughout regulation.

Complaints and stuff

(breathes deep sigh of relief)

Maud, we have to write a letter of apology to Ryan Bedrosian. – Yes, for having won the ERA and strikeout titles in the CL. – Yes, he won only 13 games. – Of course it was our team’s fault.

To be complete about our shame, Bedrosian won 5 of his 19 Raccoons starts (…!) with a 2.06 ERA. His ERA ballooned to 2.65 with Atlanta, but he won 8 of 15 games there.

Our tie with the Loggers is for the #12 and #13 pick. Only one of those is protected. At least we don’t plan on signing any big names this offseason…

Manny Fernandez led the CL in runs batted in, which is one of my favorite stats to evaluate players. He should definitely be Player of the Year again with his .751 OPS. He won hit with just 90 RBI in ’36, so I don’t see any issues here.

Fun Fact: John Byrd’s cycle on Wednesday was the first cycle to occur in the month of September since 2017.

Back then, Dallas’ Stephen St. George cycled against the Gold Sox. In between there were 32 other cycles, none of them in the month of September. I am still waiting for a rational explanation of that.

[DD Martin]

Surprised and for draft purposes disappointed this walking MASH unit found a way to play decent ball down the stretch to win 84 games. How on earth with all those ahem “interesting” AAA players did they pull that off

[Westheim]

Originally Posted by DD Martin

Surprised and for draft purposes disappointed this walking MASH unit found a way to play decent ball down the stretch to win 84 games. How on earth with all those ahem “interesting” AAA players did they pull that off

You don't sound like you'd be into a Bill Balaski shirt for 25% off. (waves off Maud) How about a Sabre uni for 40%... make that 50% off?