Raffy plays all the positions

[jaa36]

Rafael Devers has always been a team-first player, and now the Red Sox are truly putting him to the test.

After nine Red Sox succumbed to season-ending injuries (related to falling down the stairs, getting into fistfights at their children's Little League games, and trying to win kewpie dolls at the county fair), general manager Craig Breslow asked him if he'd be willing to play another position. "Of course," said Devers. "I'm just happy to do anything for the team. I'm a ballplayer, they can expect me to be able to play wherever they think I should." The only position that does not need to be filled is third base, where Alex Bregman will play.

Devers also agreed to undergo John Henry's revolutionary new human cloning technology. The other Deverses will play at every position except third base (without complaint) for the league minimum.

[jaa36]

The early returns have been... OK? for the Red Sox. Boston won on Opening Day, with a timely hit provided in the tenth inning not by one of the Deverses, but by Romy Gonzalez. The Sox went 2-3 in April, with the worst loss (unsurprisingly coming) on the day that Rafael P Devers took the mound- he gave up eight runs in 1 2/3 innings. The Deverses have struggled to just a .698 OPS so far, so the offense is likely to improve...

[jaa36]

The Red Sox limped to a 9-18 record in April, leaving them at 11-21 overall. Rafael 1B Devers won the AL Player of the Year of the Month, hitting .317 with 10 homers and 20 RBI, and playing a passable first base. Rafael P Devers is now 0-5 with a 28.54 ERA and will be relegated to the bullpen. To the surprise of no one, the Sox have the worst defensive team in the majors, but now lead the league in home runs and OPS.

[jaa36]

The Red Sox remain in last place, but were a respectable 13-15 in May, including a five-game winning streak. They scored 17 runs in two consecutive games, and they lead the league in runs scored by almost a hundred, and also lead in on-base percentage, slugging percentage and home runs. The Deverses have stayed relatively healthy so far, with the left field and right field version dealing with some nagging injuries.

[ayaghmour2]

Originally Posted by jaa36

Rafael Devers has always been a team-first player, and now the Red Sox are truly putting him to the test.

After nine Red Sox succumbed to season-ending injuries (related to falling down the stairs, getting into fistfights at their children's Little League games, and trying to win kewpie dolls at the county fair), general manager Craig Breslow asked him if he'd be willing to play another position. "Of course," said Devers. "I'm just happy to do anything for the team. I'm a ballplayer, they can expect me to be able to play wherever they think I should." The only position that does not need to be filled is third base, where Alex Bregman will play.

Devers also agreed to undergo John Henry's revolutionary new human cloning technology. The other Deverses will play at every position except third base (without complaint) for the league minimum.

This might be the funniest thing I've seen in a while! As I can already see, it's going to be pure chaos for the Red Sox! Those poor pitchers...

[jaa36]

Things got rough in June, as the Red Sox lost eight in a row and went just 8-18 to drop to 32-54 overall. Rafael 1B Devers remains the most productive player on the team, hitting .292 with 29 homers and 65 RBI. Rafael C Devers complained about his role on the team and wanted to bat cleanup, though he's actually been the worst Devers at the plate, hitting .230/9/21. The Brewers tried to acquire Rafael RF Devers in a trade... nope! Rafael P Devers has settled into a bullpen role and has dropped his ERA all the way down to 22.56.

[jaa36]

The Sox continued to slide further into the basement, and now have a record of 42-68. However, Rafael 1B Devers remains an MVP candidate and leads the AL in home runs (39), RBI (81) and WAR (4.7). Rafael 2B and Rafael RF Devers both demanded to bat cleanup. Several Deverses were sought after in trades prior to the deadline--I didn't trade them, but did send Aroldis Chapman back to the Yankees. Rafael C Devers demanded a trade himself- denied.

[jksander]

What, no SP Devers or RP Devers?

[jaa36]

The Red Sox battled August to a draw, going an even 14-14 on the month. Rafael 2B Devers hit the IL with a strained shoulder, with Vaughan Grissom coming up to replace him. Rafael P Devers won his first game of the season, and allowed just one run in dropping his ERA to 23.65. With 250 homers on the season, the Red Sox have a decent chance to set the all-time record.

[jaa36]

The final results are in... the Red Sox did not lose 100 games, finishing at 66-96. CF and SS Deverses got injured in September, allowing rookies Marcelo Mayer and Roman Anthony to play a bit. Rafael P Devers also came down with a sore arm, though he really wasn't throwing that hard.

The Sox led the league with 859 runs scored and ended up with 286 home runs, so did not break the league record of 307. They also gave up a league-leading 1005 runs and had the worst defense in the league by a mile.

Rafael 1B Devers led the club with 48 home runs, and Rafael DH Devers drove in 110. Rafael RF Devers was perhaps the most productive Devers overall, managing a .927 OPS and not-terribly-atrocious defense. Rafael C Devers was a real liability behind the plate and didn't even hit all that well. Rafael P Devers did a ton of damage even in mop-up duty, with a 4/96 strikeout to walk ratio and allowing 26 homers in just 43 innings.

I'll sim forward a bit to see what becomes of the Deverses next. They are slated to hit free agency, Boston is out of money, and they're all pretty mad...